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You're listening to this save the marriage podcast,

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your marriage can be saved and strengthened if

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you have the right

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information,

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Join doctor Lee Ba as he explores ways

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for you to improve your relationship and your

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life, starting right now.

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Hey, this is Lee welcome, and this is

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the save the Marriage podcast.

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The podcast that I designed a number of

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years back. Now in order to help you

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save your relationship. You know, when I started

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this podcast, I wondered

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exactly how much I had to talk about.

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And here we are almost 400

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episodes in if you include a couple of

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bonus episodes.

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Wow. What a journey it's been? This has

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been listened to around the world. It's been

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download now over 3750000.00

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times it amaze me. It tells me a

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couple of things. 1 thing is that people

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are out to save their marriage. The other

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thing it tells me is that people are

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in trouble in their marriage. And I want

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to be a part of your process of

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rebuilding wherever you are In fact,

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that's what I wanna talk about today. Where

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you find yourself in the midst of this

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crisis?

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Are So in my saved the marriage system,

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which is really kind of the the beginning

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point for a lot of people of walking

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into saving their marriage.

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They have to get there first, but that's

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the place where they dig in and really

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learn the skills where you can learn the

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skills you need to save your marriage. But

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in that program,

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have a quick start guide.

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What I realized years ago is that you

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can't just say, marriage crisis. Here's where you

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are, and and get busy, it's marriage crisis,

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there are 8 stages to a marriage crisis.

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And each 1 actually needs a different approach

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Now there are parts that, you know, they

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might share. So 1 and 2 have some

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similarities and, you know, 7 and 8 have

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some similarities. There's a big break at 1

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point that... Now really kind of changes the

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whole pattern of this, and that is when

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a spouse moves out, and I I go

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through that in each of the stages.

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And describe that for you in death.

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But

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that is kind of the stage of the

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marriage crisis.

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And what I wanna focus on today is

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the stage of your awareness

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of the crisis.

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Because that can happen at at different levels.

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And in fact, it can grow as it

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it goes along, but there are different levels

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to

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understanding and realizing what's going on on around

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you. You have you notice that some people

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just kinda go through

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and are kind of oblivious of things that

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are going on around them.

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And I've had this experience where I've talked

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to people and 1 person will tell me

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about off these horrible things that happened, and

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someone who was with in the same time

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will go, wow. I didn't even notice that.

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I wasn't aware of that going on. All

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So we all have a different level of

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kind of

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situational awareness to use a term from, you

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know, from

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military and from safety perspective.

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Situational awareness means it went... Wherever you are,

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you kind of understand

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what's going on around you that may put

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you at risk.

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Situational awareness is something that, many people who

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are, you know, trying to be in protective

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occupations want to practice. In fact,

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when I was going through all of my

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first aid training, it's kind of the first

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point is situational awareness stop and notice what's

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around you.

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I remember the... And the times when I

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was going through each of the first aid

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trainings, And I I've done so many first

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aid trainings in my life. I remember, you

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know, when I was,

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training for junior lifeguard guarding, as a teenager

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at the pool, we had to go through

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that. And then, again, at another program, I

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was in, we had to all be certified

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in first aid. And then again, when I

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was helping out with my son's a Cup

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scout and then voice out program. And then

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again, as I was training to be a

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Scuba instructor, I had to go through an

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extensive first aid training. And the first rule

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stop and notice.

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Before you just jump in and do something,

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stop and notice.

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That's building the situational awareness.

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You're able to look around and and kind

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of scan for what the threat is. What

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what problems do you might have coming towards

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you.

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So Well, this is partly the case with

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a marriage crisis.

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A lot of people people... A lot of

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times, people just jump in. And start doing

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everything they can,

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looking at articles, looking at videos, looking at

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all kinds of things and they just kinda

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throw it under this thing of I'll do

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this. Right? And and it kinda feels like

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that, you know, throw everything against the wall.

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Let's see what sticks,

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except for some of them fight against each

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other.

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And if you're not aware of the subtle

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of what you're doing just because you don't

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have the awareness, you just start sling stuff

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at your marriage.

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Much to the cha of your spouse and

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much to the detriment of the relationship.

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So part of what we're starting with is

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this

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situational awareness of where things are. So let's

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just talk through

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these stages.

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That happen

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when there's a marriage crisis. So first of

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all, we've already assumed

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that there is a marriage

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crisis.

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And the starting point for this, the starting

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point, the first stage,

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I referred to is

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asleep.

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That's when,

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you know, the crisis is brewing, things are

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happening, but the person is just like they

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asleep at the wheel. They don't even notice

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what's going on around them.

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And for most people, this is a starting

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point.

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Oftentimes, a spouse is struggling long before the

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spouse admits to the struggling.

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And by the way, oftentimes the marriage is

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kind of sliding into a crisis,

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and neither person is even aware of it.

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Sometimes people talk to me, and they'll tell

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me you know, that the crisis started, and

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they'll name a time a week ago, 2

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weeks ago, a month ago, 6 months ago,

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a year ago, 5 years ago. But as

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they start talking to me, it's very clear

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that the crisis pre their awareness.

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So what was happening?

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There were asleep.

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They didn't notice what was happening.

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So sleep doesn't mean you're trying to ignore

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it. Right? It means that

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Your mind is elsewhere,

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sleeping,

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zeroed in on another reality.

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Kinda reminds me of what I see so

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often with that push button, the pause button

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marriage, that pause button marriage, meaning they hit

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the pause button, they pushed it

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of and they didn't really think much about

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it,

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but slowly over time, the relationship is being

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eaten away, and they don't know it.

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Because they're in the La land of whatever

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it was

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that led them to hit the pause button,

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parenting or job or whatever it was, so

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they hit pause and they stopped paying attention.

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So they fell asleep in the midst of

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the whole marriage

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Here's the problem.

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In those situations,

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once spouse often wakes up before the other

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1 does.

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And realizes there's a problem.

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So 1 person often coming to me has

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been asleep for some time and wasn't aware

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that maybe even the spouse was doing some

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things either to help the relationship or to

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help themselves,

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to deal with what's going on to deal

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with the disconnect to deal with the pain,

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but they have that level of being having

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been asleep.

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So sleep is what happens when the crisis

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is going on and you're not even aware

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that it's building.

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And so then we hit that next point

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of aware.

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You know something's is not right.

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And many times,

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this can be either a person who kinda

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of wakes up and says, things aren't right.

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There's something wrong here. I'm aware that my

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spouse is always irritated or I'm aware that

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my spouse doesn't wanna spend time with me,

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or I'm aware that I am always irritated.

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And I don't wanna spend time with my

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spouse. I'm aware we're not getting what we

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want out of relationship. I'm aware that things

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have changed.

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So there's an awareness to this.

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And at this point,

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it would be really cool if everybody suddenly

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it, hey, we need to address this.

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We're where there's a problem, let's figure out

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how to get through it. The reality is

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that's not the case.

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When I first wrote

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the primary module in the saved the marriage

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system,

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I wrote it as a way for people

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to have a great marriage.

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And the problem is that very few people

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look at a marriage

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process or a marriage program,

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not when their marriage is okay, and they

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wanna make it better.

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They don't look until it's

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less than okay. Right? It's in trouble.

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Or

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And the problem with

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aware

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is that most people just kinda go, oh,

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I hope it kate takes care of itself.

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Well, we'll wait for the kids to get

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old enough. Well, we'll wait for this other

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time to come.

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They don't really take action.

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And the problem is that being aware of

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a problem

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and not taking action

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doesn't change the trajectory very much.

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Sometimes people tell me about this stage as

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the place where they, you know, maybe try

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to take a few changes.

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Maybe they tried date night a little bit.

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Or maybe they try to be really nice

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with the presence or try a a holiday

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or a vacation or something like that. Just

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something that they felt might be like a

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band aid.

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And what they didn't realize was there was

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always

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already a fest

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infection going on in the relationship.

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And so the awareness usually doesn't lead to

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much change. In fact, in the cases I've

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seen where they become aware and decide to

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take action. It doesn't take a whole lot

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to get things back on track.

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But most of the time,

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they let it go.

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They're aware that something's not right,

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But they don't take the time, the energy

275
00:10:17,322 --> 00:10:19,548
the effort to figure out what it would

276
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be to turn it around.

277
00:10:22,345 --> 00:10:24,566
Which leads to the next stage,

278
00:10:25,915 --> 00:10:27,264
which is when you go on alert.

279
00:10:29,743 --> 00:10:30,859
When you're at alert,

280
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you're very clear that something is wrong.

281
00:10:35,725 --> 00:10:38,436
And it usually is something that is about

282
00:10:38,436 --> 00:10:41,649
your spouse Right? At alert, most people are

283
00:10:41,649 --> 00:10:44,209
looking for what's wrong with my spouse? Why

284
00:10:44,209 --> 00:10:46,769
is my spouse not happy? Why is my

285
00:10:46,769 --> 00:10:49,250
spouse? Know, spending time away. Why is my

286
00:10:49,250 --> 00:10:51,551
spouse not wanting to have deeper discussions. Why

287
00:10:51,551 --> 00:10:53,139
is my spouse not wanting to spend times?

288
00:10:53,536 --> 00:10:55,775
It's it's in many ways, you almost a

289
00:10:55,775 --> 00:10:57,684
blame of the spouse. The spouse is the

290
00:10:57,684 --> 00:10:58,320
problem here.

291
00:10:59,832 --> 00:11:02,855
Not noticing that it's the relationship that's the

292
00:11:02,855 --> 00:11:05,255
problem. It's So at alert,

293
00:11:06,289 --> 00:11:08,992
sometimes people begin to get into a blame

294
00:11:08,992 --> 00:11:09,469
process.

295
00:11:10,423 --> 00:11:12,729
They start making accusations to each other.

296
00:11:14,572 --> 00:11:17,273
They're on alert that something's wrong. They're on

297
00:11:17,273 --> 00:11:19,656
alert that the marriage is having trouble, but

298
00:11:19,656 --> 00:11:20,394
they're also

299
00:11:21,006 --> 00:11:22,357
under the belief.

300
00:11:23,484 --> 00:11:25,795
That the spouse needs to change something.

301
00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:28,424
Something's wrong with that spouse and they need

302
00:11:28,424 --> 00:11:29,061
to get it right.

303
00:11:30,910 --> 00:11:31,950
As you can imagine,

304
00:11:32,990 --> 00:11:35,470
spouse has a different opinion about that. Know

305
00:11:35,470 --> 00:11:37,470
what happens in a marriage when both people

306
00:11:37,470 --> 00:11:40,190
believe that it's the other person.

307
00:11:40,604 --> 00:11:41,642
That's causing the problem.

308
00:11:43,159 --> 00:11:46,272
And so unfortunately, even at alert, only a

309
00:11:46,272 --> 00:11:49,007
certain percentage of people will take action

310
00:11:50,993 --> 00:11:54,413
and others continue to think that the spouse

311
00:11:54,413 --> 00:11:56,084
will get in a better mood. The spouse

312
00:11:56,084 --> 00:11:58,165
will come around. The spouse will figure out

313
00:11:58,165 --> 00:11:58,903
what's wrong

314
00:11:59,595 --> 00:12:00,786
and they keep moving forward,

315
00:12:02,851 --> 00:12:04,304
which leads us to

316
00:12:04,677 --> 00:12:05,392
the next stage.

317
00:12:06,345 --> 00:12:07,632
And and that's alarm.

318
00:12:09,300 --> 00:12:11,128
Now the alarm bells are going off.

319
00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:14,584
Now we see that there is a big

320
00:12:14,642 --> 00:12:16,636
problem. Now we see that things are beginning

321
00:12:16,636 --> 00:12:17,434
to fall apart.

322
00:12:18,870 --> 00:12:22,799
And suddenly, at alarm, people in in reactionary

323
00:12:22,858 --> 00:12:25,987
mode. They're desperate to go to therapy or

324
00:12:25,987 --> 00:12:27,985
go to a conference or have a book

325
00:12:27,985 --> 00:12:30,482
read a a spouse read a book or

326
00:12:30,621 --> 00:12:32,060
do something active.

327
00:12:33,673 --> 00:12:36,789
And so in alarm, they're suddenly doing everything

328
00:12:36,789 --> 00:12:39,346
to scramble around to get things going. Now,

329
00:12:39,666 --> 00:12:40,465
the problem is,

330
00:12:41,357 --> 00:12:44,324
that while their activity level suddenly skyrocket,

331
00:12:45,097 --> 00:12:47,723
the relationship energy has bottomed out.

332
00:12:48,534 --> 00:12:50,368
The connection has bottomed out.

333
00:12:51,165 --> 00:12:53,716
And so they're applying all of this to

334
00:12:53,716 --> 00:12:56,130
a more desperate situation and often

335
00:12:56,507 --> 00:12:58,908
just the app actions of that drive the

336
00:12:58,908 --> 00:13:00,419
spouse even further away.

337
00:13:02,407 --> 00:13:04,872
Had somebody who said that just this last

338
00:13:04,872 --> 00:13:06,621
week that their spouse had said, you know,

339
00:13:07,114 --> 00:13:08,073
don't know what to do. I think I

340
00:13:08,073 --> 00:13:09,910
need to get out of the relationship. I

341
00:13:09,910 --> 00:13:11,269
don't want to be married anymore.

342
00:13:12,627 --> 00:13:15,118
And the other spouse, I And the next

343
00:13:15,118 --> 00:13:17,513
moment said, here's a book about how we

344
00:13:17,513 --> 00:13:18,790
can work on our relationship.

345
00:13:20,067 --> 00:13:22,142
And the spouse looked at and said, I

346
00:13:22,142 --> 00:13:22,861
just said,

347
00:13:23,594 --> 00:13:25,180
I don't want to be married.

348
00:13:26,688 --> 00:13:28,909
Now, what happened was the spouse with the

349
00:13:28,909 --> 00:13:30,655
book had hit alarm.

350
00:13:32,420 --> 00:13:33,320
The spouse

351
00:13:33,860 --> 00:13:36,100
that didn't wanna work on things was well

352
00:13:36,100 --> 00:13:37,300
past alarm at this point.

353
00:13:38,820 --> 00:13:41,230
They were well aware of the marriage crisis

354
00:13:41,230 --> 00:13:43,700
long before both of them became aware of

355
00:13:43,700 --> 00:13:43,859
it.

356
00:13:44,815 --> 00:13:47,546
And that's generally what happens. There's an uneven

357
00:13:48,321 --> 00:13:49,197
place in this.

358
00:13:50,566 --> 00:13:52,318
Many times, I hear people say, you know,

359
00:13:52,557 --> 00:13:54,149
I I worked on this for years,

360
00:13:55,264 --> 00:13:58,290
but the spouse didn't know about the crisis,

361
00:13:58,543 --> 00:14:00,156
while 1 person is

362
00:14:00,610 --> 00:14:02,677
saying they're working on the relationship.

363
00:14:04,108 --> 00:14:07,068
You really can't do this. You can't say

364
00:14:07,068 --> 00:14:08,906
you've worked on the relationship when your spouse

365
00:14:08,906 --> 00:14:10,824
isn't even aware that there's a problem, but

366
00:14:10,824 --> 00:14:12,342
that's often the claim that's made.

367
00:14:14,433 --> 00:14:17,133
So we would progress through that process. On

368
00:14:17,133 --> 00:14:18,722
a regular basis I see this.

369
00:14:19,754 --> 00:14:22,534
People go from asleep to suddenly being aware.

370
00:14:23,011 --> 00:14:24,696
Something wakes them up and they go, oh,

371
00:14:25,015 --> 00:14:26,768
we've got a problem here. Well, I hope

372
00:14:26,768 --> 00:14:28,600
it goes away to alert.

373
00:14:29,476 --> 00:14:31,801
This problem seems pretty bad. Come I hope

374
00:14:31,801 --> 00:14:33,255
my spouse gets in line

375
00:14:33,710 --> 00:14:34,210
to

376
00:14:34,903 --> 00:14:37,369
alarm. Oh my gosh. We're really in trouble.

377
00:14:37,846 --> 00:14:38,664
My spouse

378
00:14:39,118 --> 00:14:41,599
has to... Shift gears has to come back

379
00:14:41,599 --> 00:14:43,189
into this relationship so we can make it

380
00:14:43,189 --> 00:14:43,428
work.

381
00:14:45,813 --> 00:14:46,927
So what's the alternative?

382
00:14:49,010 --> 00:14:49,806
Oh, it's real simple.

383
00:14:52,670 --> 00:14:53,784
1 word. Act.

384
00:14:55,868 --> 00:14:57,695
When you become aware that there's a problem,

385
00:14:58,410 --> 00:14:58,728
act.

386
00:15:01,270 --> 00:15:02,780
When you have an alert,

387
00:15:03,355 --> 00:15:06,154
going off that something really is brewing and

388
00:15:06,154 --> 00:15:08,315
and your spouse really isn't a happy.

389
00:15:08,955 --> 00:15:09,274
Act.

390
00:15:11,206 --> 00:15:15,098
When you are at alarm, you still act,

391
00:15:15,893 --> 00:15:18,197
but you have to act more carefully.

392
00:15:20,835 --> 00:15:23,460
Back when I was a hospital chaplain. Sometimes,

393
00:15:24,097 --> 00:15:25,688
we had a couple of cases where someone

394
00:15:25,688 --> 00:15:28,049
would come in who had been suffering from

395
00:15:28,409 --> 00:15:30,883
hypothermia, extreme hypothermia so much so that the

396
00:15:30,883 --> 00:15:33,677
person was coma and very close to death.

397
00:15:34,954 --> 00:15:36,630
And what they had learned over the years

398
00:15:36,630 --> 00:15:39,582
is you can't simply warm the person back

399
00:15:39,582 --> 00:15:41,986
up rapidly. You have to slowly

400
00:15:42,359 --> 00:15:44,581
bring them back to body temperature.

401
00:15:46,107 --> 00:15:49,057
Otherwise, they go into shock. They can't handle

402
00:15:49,057 --> 00:15:50,173
the stress of the change.

403
00:15:50,971 --> 00:15:52,964
They've gone into it kind of a deep

404
00:15:52,964 --> 00:15:55,210
state of hi nation. With a cold,

405
00:15:56,164 --> 00:15:57,993
and you can't suddenly bring them out of

406
00:15:57,993 --> 00:16:01,015
that right up to normal body temperature. The

407
00:16:01,015 --> 00:16:02,708
body shuts down, the heart has

408
00:16:03,019 --> 00:16:05,893
an attack. And many things happen they go

409
00:16:05,893 --> 00:16:08,048
wrong because of that. And so it has

410
00:16:08,048 --> 00:16:09,645
to happen very slowly,

411
00:16:10,443 --> 00:16:11,422
but persistent

412
00:16:12,614 --> 00:16:15,411
they have to act. They can't simply have

413
00:16:15,411 --> 00:16:17,649
the body sitting there, waiting for it to

414
00:16:17,649 --> 00:16:19,567
naturally warm up, They have to move it

415
00:16:19,567 --> 00:16:19,887
along,

416
00:16:20,446 --> 00:16:21,485
but not too fast.

417
00:16:23,738 --> 00:16:25,576
And the fact is that many times I

418
00:16:25,576 --> 00:16:29,091
see people taking the wrong actions. So you

419
00:16:29,091 --> 00:16:30,231
have to act

420
00:16:31,423 --> 00:16:33,418
but you wanna act to make sure you're

421
00:16:33,418 --> 00:16:35,993
doing it in a way that actually addresses

422
00:16:36,051 --> 00:16:37,967
the issues that have been a problem.

423
00:16:39,740 --> 00:16:41,980
Many times, people tell me about things they're

424
00:16:41,980 --> 00:16:43,980
doing to fix the issue,

425
00:16:44,860 --> 00:16:46,779
but they fail to notice what the real

426
00:16:46,779 --> 00:16:47,259
issue is.

427
00:16:48,634 --> 00:16:50,475
Had somebody said, well, I tried to do

428
00:16:50,475 --> 00:16:51,034
date night.

429
00:16:51,674 --> 00:16:52,174
And

430
00:16:52,634 --> 00:16:54,154
my spouse said, I have no desire to

431
00:16:54,154 --> 00:16:55,595
go on a date with you. So I

432
00:16:55,595 --> 00:16:57,115
don't know what to do now. See, the

433
00:16:57,115 --> 00:16:57,754
problem was,

434
00:16:58,408 --> 00:17:01,507
the real issue was disconnection. And date night

435
00:17:01,507 --> 00:17:04,685
is a leap frog in connection. It's kinda

436
00:17:04,685 --> 00:17:06,354
like adding too much heat to that poor.

437
00:17:07,642 --> 00:17:08,142
Hyper

438
00:17:08,599 --> 00:17:12,130
body that hypo body can't handle that much

439
00:17:12,188 --> 00:17:12,428
connection.

440
00:17:13,225 --> 00:17:15,378
It has to be slowly warmed in. There

441
00:17:15,378 --> 00:17:16,256
are ways to do it.

442
00:17:17,069 --> 00:17:19,644
But the danger is trying to throw everything

443
00:17:19,702 --> 00:17:20,341
at it at once.

444
00:17:21,139 --> 00:17:22,118
You can easily

445
00:17:22,496 --> 00:17:22,996
overwhelm

446
00:17:23,453 --> 00:17:24,672
a spouse when

447
00:17:25,224 --> 00:17:26,265
there's a big crisis,

448
00:17:27,065 --> 00:17:29,304
and you simply are doing it because you're

449
00:17:29,304 --> 00:17:31,625
in an alarm stage and desperate to make

450
00:17:31,625 --> 00:17:32,184
things right.

451
00:17:34,358 --> 00:17:35,317
So what do you do?

452
00:17:36,915 --> 00:17:38,674
I've already said it at every stage act.

453
00:17:39,633 --> 00:17:41,710
My hope is that first 1, asleep.

454
00:17:42,844 --> 00:17:44,043
That you're well beyond that.

455
00:17:44,842 --> 00:17:47,079
In fact, my guess is you're well beyond

456
00:17:47,079 --> 00:17:49,417
to sleep because you're listening to a podcast

457
00:17:49,476 --> 00:17:50,595
on how to save your marriage.

458
00:17:51,329 --> 00:17:53,589
Which tells me that you are at least

459
00:17:53,730 --> 00:17:56,849
aware, if not at alert or alarm.

460
00:17:59,105 --> 00:18:00,945
So you wanna make a shift to act.

461
00:18:01,825 --> 00:18:03,984
How are you gonna act that will bring

462
00:18:03,984 --> 00:18:06,244
the system back online that will bring the

463
00:18:06,305 --> 00:18:08,230
connection. Back into the relationship.

464
00:18:09,978 --> 00:18:12,124
Here's my hope for you. I have the

465
00:18:12,124 --> 00:18:13,951
save of the marriage system. It's a program

466
00:18:13,951 --> 00:18:15,899
that I have had now

467
00:18:16,275 --> 00:18:19,061
for 20 years in various stages of development.

468
00:18:19,220 --> 00:18:20,892
As soon as we figure out something better,

469
00:18:21,370 --> 00:18:23,297
we added in. And I have a team

470
00:18:23,297 --> 00:18:25,132
of coaches that work with me to make

471
00:18:25,132 --> 00:18:26,727
sure that we are keeping on top of

472
00:18:26,727 --> 00:18:26,886
that.

473
00:18:27,684 --> 00:18:30,236
Because what we do is we learn, we

474
00:18:30,236 --> 00:18:31,353
reflect and we teach.

475
00:18:32,884 --> 00:18:34,164
And part of what we're trying to do

476
00:18:34,164 --> 00:18:36,325
is make sure that you have the most

477
00:18:36,325 --> 00:18:36,644
helpful.

478
00:18:37,444 --> 00:18:40,164
Most effective and most up to date information

479
00:18:40,164 --> 00:18:42,175
to help you move through that process. The

480
00:18:42,175 --> 00:18:44,087
save the mirror system is designed to walk

481
00:18:44,087 --> 00:18:46,796
you from disconnection back to connection to understand

482
00:18:46,796 --> 00:18:47,433
how to do that.

483
00:18:48,310 --> 00:18:50,565
That It works from A3C

484
00:18:50,565 --> 00:18:53,224
model. That's my model. My 3 c model

485
00:18:53,605 --> 00:18:56,085
for restoring a... A relationship which is based

486
00:18:56,085 --> 00:18:59,455
in connection. Change and creating a new path.

487
00:18:59,934 --> 00:19:01,690
Those are the 3 c's. Only 3 c's

488
00:19:01,690 --> 00:19:02,728
you have to focus on,

489
00:19:03,526 --> 00:19:05,681
connect, change, create a new path.

490
00:19:06,893 --> 00:19:08,802
My hope is that if you haven't found

491
00:19:08,802 --> 00:19:09,915
a path that's working.

492
00:19:11,268 --> 00:19:13,097
Even if you've made mistakes in the past,

493
00:19:14,150 --> 00:19:14,970
Even if you've

494
00:19:15,350 --> 00:19:17,509
chosen to ignore it in the past that

495
00:19:17,509 --> 00:19:19,670
now you're stepping into this, now you're ready

496
00:19:19,670 --> 00:19:22,320
to take action. And if you are, Please

497
00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:24,460
join me at save the marriage dot com

498
00:19:24,460 --> 00:19:27,153
that's save the marriage dot com. If you

499
00:19:27,153 --> 00:19:28,421
already have my system,

500
00:19:29,549 --> 00:19:32,750
notice where maybe you have been waiting for

501
00:19:32,750 --> 00:19:35,150
something to shift instead of taking action.

502
00:19:36,525 --> 00:19:38,365
It's time for us to move this along.

503
00:19:38,845 --> 00:19:40,444
It's time for us to make sure that

504
00:19:40,444 --> 00:19:42,285
your relationship comes back to where you want

505
00:19:42,285 --> 00:19:44,285
it to be a loving relationship that you

506
00:19:44,285 --> 00:19:45,164
both would treasure.

507
00:19:46,139 --> 00:19:47,897
So join me at save the marriage dot

508
00:19:47,897 --> 00:19:50,774
com. Now, to get the most up to

509
00:19:50,774 --> 00:19:52,393
date leading edge

510
00:19:52,851 --> 00:19:53,970
information on what to do.

511
00:19:55,103 --> 00:19:57,977
Take the free week of Vip. I offer

512
00:19:57,977 --> 00:19:59,493
it there. It's a free week of my

513
00:19:59,653 --> 00:20:02,127
Vip program. Go ahead and grab it. It's

514
00:20:02,127 --> 00:20:02,925
1 free week.

515
00:20:03,579 --> 00:20:05,337
And also sign up to meet with 1

516
00:20:05,337 --> 00:20:06,935
of my coaches. It's also free.

517
00:20:07,495 --> 00:20:09,253
It's about a 15 to 20 minute get

518
00:20:09,253 --> 00:20:10,851
started session to make sure we get you

519
00:20:10,851 --> 00:20:11,650
on the right path.

520
00:20:12,781 --> 00:20:14,392
The path that doesn't work

521
00:20:15,003 --> 00:20:16,035
is being asleep,

522
00:20:17,067 --> 00:20:19,075
slowly waking up to an awareness.

523
00:20:20,499 --> 00:20:22,496
But allowing it to go further to the

524
00:20:22,496 --> 00:20:24,733
point where you're suddenly alert to the problem,

525
00:20:25,612 --> 00:20:29,142
still not taking action up aligning yourself with

526
00:20:29,142 --> 00:20:29,642
alarm

527
00:20:30,420 --> 00:20:32,098
and then still not acting.

528
00:20:33,136 --> 00:20:34,355
Wherever you are

529
00:20:35,148 --> 00:20:36,425
aware, alert, alarm.

530
00:20:37,941 --> 00:20:40,016
It's time to act. Join me at save

531
00:20:40,016 --> 00:20:42,570
the marriage dot com that's save the myriad,

532
00:20:42,824 --> 00:20:43,303
dot com.

533
00:20:43,941 --> 00:20:45,615
This is Lee Ba wishing you the best

534
00:20:45,615 --> 00:20:47,769
as you work. To save your marriage.

535
00:20:49,604 --> 00:20:52,257
You've been listening to save the marriage podcast

536
00:20:52,729 --> 00:20:55,118
For more information and help, please visit us

537
00:20:55,118 --> 00:20:57,188
and save the marriage dot com.