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I received this question from a Christian single

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woman who asked the question, how many dates

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should I wait before having sex?

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Coming from a Christian single person,

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it's a question that sparks controversy and curiosity,

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especially when society seems to place an increasing

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emphasis on physical intimacy

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early in relationships.

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But when you're striving to follow biblical principles,

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the answer is about more than just numbers

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or timing.

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It's about honoring God's design for intimacy.

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So let's approach this with a little humor

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and warmth, like a conversation you'd have over

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coffee with a close friend.

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You're not alone in wondering about this, and

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believe it or not, God has quite a

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bit to say on the subject,

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which is where we'll find our guidance.

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The question of dates, is there a magic

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number?

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Some people might throw out numbers.

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Three dates is enough. No. Wait until date

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10.

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Or you have to wait at least six

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months.

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But is there a magic number that dictates

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when it's appropriate to have sex?

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Spoiler alert, the Bible doesn't mention anything about

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three dates,

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six dates, or 100 dates before getting intimate.

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Instead, God's word is very clear about serving

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sexual intimacy

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for the covenant of marriage.

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That's right. No arbitrary number of dates will

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change what the Bible encourages.

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So the real answer to the question of

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how many dates is simple.

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Wait until after the wedding.

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But why?

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What's the reasoning behind this seemingly counter cultural

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idea?

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Let's break it down from a biblical perspective

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with some humor and grace sprinkled in for

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good measure.

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God's top 10 reasons to wait until marriage.

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Here's a little tongue in cheek look at

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why God in his wisdom

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calls us to save sex for marriage.

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While it's a serious topic,

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a little lightheartedness

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can help us understand these profound truths in

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a more relatable way.

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One,

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true commitment is made before a crowd

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not just on the couch.

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Marriage is a public declaration of commitment

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blessed by God and witnessed by your family,

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friends, and the community.

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It's not something you whisper in someone's ear

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on date number five.

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God designed sex to be a beautiful and

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private expression

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of that public commitment.

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So when you wait, you're saying,

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I'm reserving this deep connection for someone who

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has pledged to be with me for life.

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Two,

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because what would Jesus do

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doesn't involve awkward goodbyes after breakfast.

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We know Jesus led a life of purity

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and he called us to follow him.

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It might sound funny, but when you ask

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yourself,

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what would Jesus do in the context of

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dating,

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you're not picturing him navigating

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awkward morning after situations

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or casual hookups.

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He gave us the example of living with

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integrity,

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honor, and respect for ourselves and others.

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Plus, think about avoiding those post breakfast awkward

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silences.

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Three,

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the no regrets policy.

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Waiting until marriage eliminates the heartache of wondering,

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was that the right choice?

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Or dealing with emotional baggage from relationships

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that didn't work out.

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There's something freeing about knowing you'll enter your

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marriage without regrets

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having honored God's standards.

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No need for those cringeworthy,

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oops, what did I just do moments.

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Four,

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intimacy should be built on communication,

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not just chemistry.

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Let's be real.

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Chemistry is great, but it's not what keeps

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a relationship together.

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Waiting until marriage allows you to focus on

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building a solid foundation

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based on communication,

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trust, and mutual respect.

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It's easy to get swept up in physical

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attraction,

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but long lasting love is built on understanding

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and growing together,

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not just sparks and fireworks.

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Five,

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sex is like a fine wine.

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It gets better with time and the right

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conditions.

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Here's a fun analogy.

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Sex is like a fine wine. It gets

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better when aged in the right environment,

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which in this case is the safety and

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commitment of marriage.

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Rushing into it is like cracking open a

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bottle too

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soon. It's just not going to taste as

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good.

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Waiting gives you the assurance that you're experiencing

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intimacy

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the way God intended

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and with the person committed to sharing a

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lifetime

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with you. Six,

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you don't wanna confuse butterflies with commitment.

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The initial fluttery feelings when you meet someone

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can make you think this is the one,

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but feelings fade.

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Commitment lasts.

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God's plan for sex within marriage

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is like the seal on a lifelong commitment,

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not something you experiment with based on fleeting

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emotions.

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Waiting helps you discern true commitment

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from just infatuation.

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Seven, it's a gift you'll never regret giving

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to your spouse.

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Think of sex as a gift. And like

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any gift, it's special when given at the

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right time.

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By saving that gift for your spouse, you're

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offering something deeply personal that will be a

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blessing to both of you.

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There's no feeling like knowing that you've saved

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something sacred just for them.

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Imagine the joy of unwrapping that gift together

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in the context of a committed,

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God honoring marriage.

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Eight, no worries about becoming a relationship statistic.

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It's a sad fact that many relationships that

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become physically intimate too soon

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often struggle with issues of trust,

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insecurity, or disconnection later.

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Waiting until marriage offers the security of knowing

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you're entering a relationship

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where both parties have been intentional about keeping

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God's best for the right time.

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You're not just another statistic of couples who

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rushed in and fizzled out.

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Nine,

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sex is sacred, not casual.

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In today's world, it's easy to think sex

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is no big deal. It's just a fun

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thing people do when they're in a relationship.

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Right?

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But God sees sex as sacred, not something

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to be treated casually.

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It's not a recreational activity.

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It's a spiritual and emotional deep

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way. Treating it with the reverence it deserves

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by waiting until marriage helps us honor God's

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design.

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10,

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God's way is the best way. No assembly

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required.

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God's instructions aren't meant to ruin your fun

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or make you miss out on life.

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Instead, his way is the blueprint for living

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a life that's fulfilling,

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joyful,

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and without unnecessary

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complications.

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Waiting until marriage isn't some outdated rule. It's

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God's loving guidance to protect our hearts and

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help us experience the fullness of intimacy

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the way he designed it.

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No confusing instructions or assembly needed. Just trust

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his plan.

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But what if I've already had sex?

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You might be reading this and thinking,

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but I've already crossed that line. Does this

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mean it's too late for me?

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Absolutely not. God's grace is abundant and he

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offers forgiveness,

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healing, and a fresh start to anyone who

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seeks it.

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It's never too late to make the decision

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to honor him in your relationships going forward.

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If you've already experienced sexual intimacy

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outside of marriage, take heart in knowing that

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God can redeem any situation.

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You can make a commitment today to honor

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God's design for sex in the future,

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trusting in his grace and forgiveness.

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Your past doesn't define you.

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God's love and plan for your life does.

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Final thoughts. Waiting is worth it.

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In a world that seems to move faster

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and faster, the idea of waiting can feel

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countercultural

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and sometimes downright difficult.

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But as a Christian single woman, your commitment

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to following God's design for sex and marriage

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is not only a testimony to your faith,

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but also a powerful way to build a

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healthy, lasting relationship.

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Remember, there's no magic number of dates before

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having sex because the Bible's guidance is clear.

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Wait until marriage.

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It might not be the easiest path, but

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it's the one that will ultimately bring you

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peace,

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joy, and fulfillment in your relationships.

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So how many dates before sex?

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Let's go with one. Just make sure it's

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the wedding date.