1
00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:02,720
If you are seeking practical advice for widowed

2
00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:05,379
Christian singles, you came to the right site.

3
00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:08,160
But let's get one thing straight. Being a

4
00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:09,300
widow is hard.

5
00:00:09,839 --> 00:00:11,919
No one enters a marriage thinking it will

6
00:00:11,919 --> 00:00:12,900
end that way,

7
00:00:13,314 --> 00:00:15,634
especially when you're someone who holds faith close

8
00:00:15,634 --> 00:00:16,454
to your heart.

9
00:00:17,315 --> 00:00:19,635
But as life can sometimes be messy, so

10
00:00:19,635 --> 00:00:20,855
too can our relationships.

11
00:00:21,714 --> 00:00:22,855
So here you are,

12
00:00:23,314 --> 00:00:26,149
a widowed Christian single, And you know what?

13
00:00:26,370 --> 00:00:27,190
That's okay.

14
00:00:27,970 --> 00:00:30,210
Life didn't turn out how you expected, but

15
00:00:30,210 --> 00:00:32,210
God's not done with you yet. Far from

16
00:00:32,210 --> 00:00:32,710
it.

17
00:00:33,170 --> 00:00:35,489
Let's unpack some of the common challenges and

18
00:00:35,489 --> 00:00:36,229
find hope,

19
00:00:36,609 --> 00:00:38,710
humor, and healing along the way.

20
00:00:39,895 --> 00:00:40,395
One,

21
00:00:41,015 --> 00:00:43,354
being a widowed Christian single in the church,

22
00:00:43,975 --> 00:00:45,674
feeling like a spiritual oddball.

23
00:00:47,335 --> 00:00:49,174
Being a widowed single in the church can

24
00:00:49,174 --> 00:00:51,494
sometimes feel like you're wearing a neon sign

25
00:00:51,494 --> 00:00:54,314
that says, please feel awkward around me.

26
00:00:55,469 --> 00:00:57,469
Maybe your church family isn't sure what to

27
00:00:57,469 --> 00:00:59,469
say or maybe some of them bless their

28
00:00:59,469 --> 00:00:59,969
hearts

29
00:01:00,350 --> 00:01:02,189
and treat you like a walking reminder of

30
00:01:02,189 --> 00:01:03,570
the w word.

31
00:01:05,150 --> 00:01:06,129
Here's the thing.

32
00:01:06,430 --> 00:01:08,744
Your value in God's eyes hasn't changed one

33
00:01:08,744 --> 00:01:09,244
bit.

34
00:01:09,704 --> 00:01:12,125
You are still a beloved child of God,

35
00:01:12,265 --> 00:01:14,364
no less because of what's in your past.

36
00:01:15,625 --> 00:01:16,765
Practical tip,

37
00:01:17,144 --> 00:01:20,204
seek out Christian communities that embrace your journey.

38
00:01:20,984 --> 00:01:22,504
If you feel out of place in your

39
00:01:22,504 --> 00:01:23,310
current church,

40
00:01:23,869 --> 00:01:26,509
consider looking for divorce recovery groups or bible

41
00:01:26,509 --> 00:01:27,569
studies for singles.

42
00:01:29,069 --> 00:01:31,709
In Matthew eleven twenty eight, Jesus invites the

43
00:01:31,709 --> 00:01:33,810
weary to come to him for rest.

44
00:01:34,670 --> 00:01:36,944
That includes you, and he's never weird about

45
00:01:38,545 --> 00:01:41,665
it. Whitehearted side note, be prepared for the

46
00:01:41,665 --> 00:01:44,805
occasional well meaning advice from church members like,

47
00:01:45,025 --> 00:01:47,125
God has someone even better for you.

48
00:01:48,064 --> 00:01:48,885
Smile politely,

49
00:01:49,265 --> 00:01:51,829
thank them, and avoid rolling your eyes.

50
00:01:52,290 --> 00:01:54,689
It's okay. They mean well, but God's plan

51
00:01:54,689 --> 00:01:57,010
is way bigger than another human filling a

52
00:01:57,010 --> 00:01:57,510
void.

53
00:01:59,329 --> 00:01:59,829
Two,

54
00:02:00,290 --> 00:02:00,790
dating.

55
00:02:01,170 --> 00:02:03,829
The wild west of Christian dating apps.

56
00:02:05,395 --> 00:02:07,954
If you thought dating was complicated before, try

57
00:02:07,954 --> 00:02:09,735
diving back in after a divorce.

58
00:02:10,675 --> 00:02:13,094
It's like discovering that the rules of monopoly

59
00:02:13,235 --> 00:02:16,455
have changed, and now there's online speed dating,

60
00:02:16,754 --> 00:02:17,814
courtship protocols,

61
00:02:18,540 --> 00:02:22,080
and vague references to being equally yoked everywhere.

62
00:02:23,419 --> 00:02:23,919
Spoiler,

63
00:02:24,300 --> 00:02:26,939
you'll find out that equally yoked doesn't mean

64
00:02:26,939 --> 00:02:28,879
both liking avocado toast.

65
00:02:30,620 --> 00:02:31,760
Biblical guidance.

66
00:02:32,694 --> 00:02:35,655
In first Corinthians seven thirty two to 35,

67
00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:37,995
Paul talks about the advantages of singleness.

68
00:02:39,014 --> 00:02:40,855
It can be a time of deep devotion

69
00:02:40,855 --> 00:02:42,314
to the Lord without distractions.

70
00:02:43,655 --> 00:02:45,594
Use this season to grow spiritually.

71
00:02:46,610 --> 00:02:48,530
But if you feel ready to date again,

72
00:02:48,530 --> 00:02:49,669
take things slow.

73
00:02:50,050 --> 00:02:51,669
Pray for wisdom and discernment,

74
00:02:52,290 --> 00:02:54,530
and maybe stay away from anyone whose idea

75
00:02:54,530 --> 00:02:56,129
of a first date is a two hour

76
00:02:56,129 --> 00:02:57,590
lecture on the end times.

77
00:02:59,425 --> 00:03:00,485
Practical tip.

78
00:03:01,025 --> 00:03:02,564
Set boundaries early.

79
00:03:03,185 --> 00:03:05,185
You've been through a lot and dating after

80
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:07,344
a divorce requires you to protect your heart

81
00:03:07,344 --> 00:03:08,564
and spiritual well-being.

82
00:03:09,905 --> 00:03:11,789
Pray about the kind of partner you want

83
00:03:11,949 --> 00:03:13,709
and keep in mind that it's okay if

84
00:03:13,709 --> 00:03:14,689
they're not perfect,

85
00:03:14,989 --> 00:03:15,969
just like you.

86
00:03:17,150 --> 00:03:18,370
Also, don't rush.

87
00:03:18,909 --> 00:03:22,049
God's timing, as frustrating as it sometimes feels,

88
00:03:22,189 --> 00:03:23,650
is always best.

89
00:03:25,305 --> 00:03:26,604
Dating fun fact.

90
00:03:27,145 --> 00:03:29,944
There are actual Christian memes about dating apps

91
00:03:29,944 --> 00:03:31,164
like Christian Mingle.

92
00:03:31,625 --> 00:03:33,705
And if you've spent even five minutes on

93
00:03:33,705 --> 00:03:35,884
one of those apps, you'll understand the humor.

94
00:03:37,169 --> 00:03:40,150
Be prepared for profile bios that range from

95
00:03:40,209 --> 00:03:42,629
I love Jesus and CrossFit to

96
00:03:43,090 --> 00:03:45,889
looking for a Proverbs 31 woman, but no

97
00:03:45,889 --> 00:03:46,389
pressure.

98
00:03:48,609 --> 00:03:49,109
Three,

99
00:03:50,049 --> 00:03:50,549
finances,

100
00:03:51,094 --> 00:03:54,614
that whole two incomes becoming one, oops never

101
00:03:54,614 --> 00:03:55,674
mind thing.

102
00:03:57,414 --> 00:04:00,134
Let's be real. Finances after a divorce can

103
00:04:00,134 --> 00:04:02,694
feel like someone upended your monopoly game and

104
00:04:02,694 --> 00:04:04,715
took half your properties with them.

105
00:04:05,790 --> 00:04:07,790
You might be adjusting from a two income

106
00:04:07,790 --> 00:04:08,930
household to one

107
00:04:09,550 --> 00:04:11,569
or dealing with a host of other financial

108
00:04:11,629 --> 00:04:12,129
challenges.

109
00:04:13,310 --> 00:04:15,629
It's normal to feel a bit overwhelmed by

110
00:04:15,629 --> 00:04:16,290
it all.

111
00:04:17,949 --> 00:04:19,009
Biblical encouragement.

112
00:04:20,245 --> 00:04:22,725
Philippians four nineteen reminds us that God will

113
00:04:22,725 --> 00:04:25,444
supply all our needs according to his riches

114
00:04:25,444 --> 00:04:26,105
and glory.

115
00:04:27,444 --> 00:04:29,865
That doesn't mean an ATM will miraculously

116
00:04:30,245 --> 00:04:31,384
appear in your backyard,

117
00:04:32,404 --> 00:04:34,404
but it does mean he is faithful and

118
00:04:34,404 --> 00:04:35,509
will provide for

119
00:04:37,250 --> 00:04:40,550
you. Practical tip. Create a financial plan.

120
00:04:41,170 --> 00:04:43,730
If budgeting wasn't your strong suit before, now's

121
00:04:43,730 --> 00:04:45,189
a great time to learn.

122
00:04:46,449 --> 00:04:48,850
Set up a savings account, pay down debts

123
00:04:48,850 --> 00:04:49,910
if you have them,

124
00:04:50,285 --> 00:04:52,764
and consider talking to a financial advisor who

125
00:04:52,764 --> 00:04:55,425
can help you organize your post divorce finances.

126
00:04:56,685 --> 00:04:58,785
Oh, and don't be afraid to use coupons.

127
00:04:58,925 --> 00:05:00,785
There's no shame in being frugal,

128
00:05:01,324 --> 00:05:02,865
especially when you're rebuilding.

129
00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:08,360
Humorous aside, there's something oddly satisfying about saving

130
00:05:08,360 --> 00:05:10,279
50¢ on a can of beans at the

131
00:05:10,279 --> 00:05:11,259
grocery store.

132
00:05:12,120 --> 00:05:14,540
Who knew adulting would include such thrills?

133
00:05:17,415 --> 00:05:19,675
Four, parenting as a widowed single,

134
00:05:20,535 --> 00:05:22,954
captain of the, sometimes chaotic,

135
00:05:23,334 --> 00:05:23,834
ship.

136
00:05:25,495 --> 00:05:28,454
If you have children, navigating parenthood after losing

137
00:05:28,454 --> 00:05:30,540
a mate adds an extra layer of

138
00:05:32,540 --> 00:05:34,160
complexity. Biblical guidance.

139
00:05:34,860 --> 00:05:37,740
In Deuteronomy six six to seven, parents are

140
00:05:37,740 --> 00:05:41,100
instructed to diligently teach their children about god's

141
00:05:41,100 --> 00:05:41,600
ways.

142
00:05:43,154 --> 00:05:44,834
While it might feel harder to do this

143
00:05:44,834 --> 00:05:46,914
alone, remember that God is with you in

144
00:05:46,914 --> 00:05:47,894
every conversation,

145
00:05:48,514 --> 00:05:49,894
every bedtime prayer,

146
00:05:50,354 --> 00:05:53,014
and every carpool sing along to Christian radio.

147
00:05:54,435 --> 00:05:56,834
Trust that his grace will cover where you

148
00:05:56,834 --> 00:05:57,574
feel inadequate.

149
00:05:58,060 --> 00:06:01,019
Practical tip. Establish routines that help your kids

150
00:06:01,019 --> 00:06:01,839
feel secure.

151
00:06:02,379 --> 00:06:04,699
Whether it's family bible time, game nights, or

152
00:06:04,699 --> 00:06:07,019
simply a regular let's talk about our day

153
00:06:07,019 --> 00:06:07,519
moment,

154
00:06:07,899 --> 00:06:09,680
these little things create stability.

155
00:06:10,475 --> 00:06:11,774
If you're co parenting,

156
00:06:12,475 --> 00:06:15,115
good communication is key, even if you sometimes

157
00:06:15,115 --> 00:06:16,955
wanna throw your phone out the window mid

158
00:06:16,955 --> 00:06:17,455
text.

159
00:06:17,995 --> 00:06:20,395
Breathe and remember that you're all doing your

160
00:06:20,395 --> 00:06:20,895
best.

161
00:06:21,835 --> 00:06:22,895
Parenting laugh.

162
00:06:23,259 --> 00:06:25,180
If you've ever had to explain why Jonah

163
00:06:25,180 --> 00:06:27,120
didn't just Uber home from Nineveh,

164
00:06:27,660 --> 00:06:30,300
you know the joys of Christian parenting. Kids

165
00:06:30,300 --> 00:06:31,360
keep you humble.

166
00:06:32,699 --> 00:06:35,660
Five, self worth. Rebuilding when you feel like

167
00:06:35,660 --> 00:06:36,240
a mosaic.

168
00:06:37,724 --> 00:06:39,644
The death of your loved one can shatter

169
00:06:39,644 --> 00:06:42,125
your sense of self worth, especially in the

170
00:06:42,125 --> 00:06:44,284
community where marriage is often held as the

171
00:06:44,284 --> 00:06:46,064
gold standard of Christian life.

172
00:06:46,764 --> 00:06:48,844
But you are not defined by your marital

173
00:06:48,844 --> 00:06:51,485
status, and your value isn't tied to being

174
00:06:51,485 --> 00:06:52,144
a spouse.

175
00:06:52,899 --> 00:06:54,819
God still has a purpose for you, and

176
00:06:54,819 --> 00:06:56,439
your story isn't over.

177
00:06:57,539 --> 00:06:58,680
Biblical reminder.

178
00:06:59,300 --> 00:07:02,500
In Isaiah 61 verse three, we're reminded that

179
00:07:02,500 --> 00:07:04,519
God gives beauty for ashes.

180
00:07:05,379 --> 00:07:07,104
Your life may feel like a pile of

181
00:07:07,104 --> 00:07:09,264
ashes right now, but God is in the

182
00:07:09,264 --> 00:07:10,324
business of restoration.

183
00:07:11,345 --> 00:07:12,485
You are a masterpiece

184
00:07:12,865 --> 00:07:13,685
in progress.

185
00:07:15,264 --> 00:07:19,764
Practical tip. Focus on self care, spiritual, emotional,

186
00:07:20,144 --> 00:07:20,884
and physical.

187
00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:23,980
Get involved in ministries that speak to your

188
00:07:23,980 --> 00:07:26,720
heart, surround yourself with supportive friends, and

189
00:07:27,340 --> 00:07:29,920
maybe take up a new hobby besides stress

190
00:07:30,779 --> 00:07:33,920
eating. Ice cream, though that's valid sometimes too.

191
00:07:34,779 --> 00:07:37,625
Most importantly, ask God to show you how

192
00:07:37,625 --> 00:07:40,365
he sees you because spoiler alert,

193
00:07:40,904 --> 00:07:42,685
it's with love and grace.

194
00:07:44,024 --> 00:07:45,084
Humorous reflection.

195
00:07:46,024 --> 00:07:48,264
Have you ever wondered if the Proverbs 31

196
00:07:48,264 --> 00:07:49,669
woman took a day off?

197
00:07:50,449 --> 00:07:53,009
Self care is a real thing. She probably

198
00:07:53,009 --> 00:07:54,470
had a spa day too.

199
00:07:56,449 --> 00:07:58,229
Six, hope for the future.

200
00:07:58,529 --> 00:08:00,789
It's not over. It's just different.

201
00:08:01,970 --> 00:08:04,485
Here's the best part. Your story isn't finished

202
00:08:04,485 --> 00:08:07,125
yet. Whether you're still healing, ready to dip

203
00:08:07,125 --> 00:08:09,205
your toes back into dating, or learning how

204
00:08:09,205 --> 00:08:10,345
to live on your own,

205
00:08:10,884 --> 00:08:12,725
God is with you every step of the

206
00:08:12,725 --> 00:08:13,225
way.

207
00:08:14,084 --> 00:08:16,264
Being a widow may have changed the landscape

208
00:08:16,324 --> 00:08:18,430
of your life, but it hasn't canceled the

209
00:08:18,430 --> 00:08:20,129
plans God has for you.

210
00:08:20,990 --> 00:08:23,250
Jeremiah twenty nine eleven says,

211
00:08:23,710 --> 00:08:25,389
for I know the plans I have for

212
00:08:25,389 --> 00:08:28,029
you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and

213
00:08:28,029 --> 00:08:29,009
not for evil,

214
00:08:29,389 --> 00:08:31,685
to give you a future and a hope.

215
00:08:32,704 --> 00:08:34,784
There's so much hope ahead even if the

216
00:08:34,784 --> 00:08:36,565
path looks different than you imagine.

217
00:08:37,105 --> 00:08:38,404
So take a deep breath,

218
00:08:38,865 --> 00:08:40,404
laugh at the awkward moments,

219
00:08:40,865 --> 00:08:42,945
and trust that God is weaving all these

220
00:08:42,945 --> 00:08:45,204
threads together into something beautiful.

221
00:08:46,149 --> 00:08:48,330
You've got this, and more importantly,

222
00:08:49,029 --> 00:08:50,490
God's got you.

223
00:08:51,750 --> 00:08:52,570
Final thought.

224
00:08:53,316 --> 00:08:54,755
You might not have planned to be a

225
00:08:54,755 --> 00:08:57,235
widowed Christian single, but God can still write

226
00:08:57,235 --> 00:08:59,415
a beautiful story from the broken pieces.

227
00:09:00,035 --> 00:09:02,035
And don't forget, you're not alone in this

228
00:09:02,035 --> 00:09:02,510
journey.