You're listening to the Loving BDSM podcast, episode
four forty
nine. Kilolord's here with the one, the only,
the
I can't think of anything snarky to say,
and I don't know how I feel about
that, John Brownstone.
Wow.
I don't know if it's because of
the great dickening as mentioned
last
week
or
if it's actually because of what we've been
doing that is the topic of this week's
episode.
I don't know.
But every time I look at you, I'm
just like, I'm supposed to find something sort
of cheeky to say. I'm like, I just
wanna say I love him so much,
which is not a bad thing. I'm not
complaining. Yet. But it does make the
the sass a little harder to do. Yeah.
And I don't I don't think I do
well with sweet. I don't know if it's
Oh. Yeah. I prefer the sass.
Anyway, so that is and isn't what we're
talking about. This week, we're talking about our
experience over the past several weeks of using
the Obedience app. Welcome to the Loving BDSM
podcast. If this is your first time listening,
glad to have you. If you're back for
another week, welcome back. Living BDSM is produced
every Friday for your kinky pleasure and education,
and show notes are found at lovingbdsm.net.
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can also follow the show on FetLife at
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PC,
on Instagram,
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forever
fucking hate.
It's loving d s on the number one,
so it's at loving d s one.
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We are grateful for every single fucking one
of you. Yes. We are. If you would
like to,
you know, be part of an online kink
community,
get more of us, including
us talking about our experience using the Obedience
app as we were first trying it out
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or use the link in the show notes.
Okay. So
before we get into
the episode,
I would like to announce,
one, that I remembered this, and it's been
on my mind long enough for me to
have remembered it. But next week, we celebrate
our tenth podcast anniversary. Mhmm. 08/15/2005
is when we began. Mhmm. 08/15/2005.
Jesus. 2015.
You just let me go too. You're like,
yeah. 02/2005.
Yep. Yep. Twenty fucking years. '10. 2015.
Oh my god.
Professionals would redo that.
We've never claimed to be professionals. Yeah. 2015.
Yeah. 08/15/2015.
August 15. Next week is next is a
Friday. It's also our,
Friday night livestream. So, hopefully, that livestream will
be a part day. Mhmm.
So, yeah, we are gonna have a giveaway.
I'm finalizing that,
like, literally in the next two days.
We're gonna celebrate next week, and
we have not nailed down the topic for
next week, but I'm thinking it's a poll
questions,
from audience like we do sometimes on Instagram
or whatever.
So we shall see.
So, yeah, that's coming next week. We're very
excited. Yay. Okay.
So the topic
Mhmm. Is on our use for the of
the Obedience app.
We will talk about what it is if
you were not familiar with it, but,
we have used the free version this whole
time. We've been using it, what, like, two
months? That seems about right? About eight weeks?
Yeah. Somewhere in there? Yep. I can open
my phone and tell you. Mhmm. I'm just
not doing that right now. We we have
done everything we're gonna talk about using the
free version. There is a paid version. We
both agree if we get to a point
with our usage of the app that we're
like, oh, we want these features or we
need them to to do more of what
we wanna do, then we are we like
it enough. I'll go ahead and give you
the spoiler that we would pay for it.
But
as we're talking about this through this whole
episode, everything you're gonna hear from our experience
is the free version.
So you don't necessarily have to pay for
it to do what we have done with
it.
So yeah. That's kinda like the disclaimer.
If at any point you're like, I am
curious about the obedience app. There is a
link down below in the places blah blah
blah.
You can go clicky click and learn more,
tapy tap, whatever people do with links anymore.
I don't I am old school. You say
click the link, but most people are not
clicking links anymore. We are tapping.
And I just
it
I don't like to be imprecise.
Okay. Tap click.
So Yep. JB's got a whole portion he
is gonna have to do because he did
this,
not me, which was cool. But
well before we started using the obedience app
Mhmm. We talked about it. Right. Thank God
we talked about it because how this came
about, it was only because we had previously
talked about it. We're like, oh, yes. Part
of our, like, twenty twenty five. Let's, like,
figure ourselves out again. Maybe we try what
we said was maybe we'll try different apps.
Mhmm.
And obedience was one of them.
There is
another app called Embrace, which we are gonna
try, but it's not the same thing as
Obedience. It's has different
functions.
And I got an email from somebody who
wanted to promote their app, and I was
like, hey. Then we can compare apps. Right.
By the time I finally got to that
link in my inbox, they no longer existed.
I couldn't find them anywhere. Oh, dear. So
all I'm sure there are others out there.
Feel free to share other apps that are
BDSM apps, not
what we always have to do, which is
prefer a vanilla thing and and make it
work for us. But that's yeah. We're we're
focused right now on obedience, and I think
we're mostly happy.
Mhmm.
But we talked about it, and then we
both kinda kept saying, we should do something.
We should do that we're gonna do that
eventually. And that was one of the that
was one of the things that we it
was one of those things that you know
we we're just going back and forth talking
about it. Talk talk talk talk talk talk.
You know and and we both
liked the idea Yes. But it never moved
beyond
talking.
No. We were we were definitely,
it was wishful thinking. Yeah. It was we'll
do that later and then later never came.
Right. Until I decided later is now. And
so I'm gonna get in. I wanna talk
about what it is before we talk about
what we did with it. But what I'm
curious about
from you is, what was the impetus for
that? Where you finally went, fuck it. We're
just doing this. Mhmm.
You
know, there there were a couple different reasons.
You know, one,
I have been so busy lately immersed in
so many different things.
Heart keeping shit straight. Mhmm.
Mhmm. And I thought if that this if
this could help me,
then let's do it. Mhmm.
You know, and
that we had you know, the idea that
we had talked about it and we both
agreed with it,
I was just like,
you know,
time to, pull the trigger on this. Yeah.
It was really random. He is on the
couch. I'm on the love seat. I'm holding
my phone because, of course, I am. I'm
holding my phone, and here comes a a
text with a link, like an invite
from Southern Sir, and I'm like,
and so
click the link, download the app, set up
the account, put my picture in there,
and then see that there are at the
time, there was, like, one task. Yes. There
was one task in there. Mhmm.
There were
rewards.
There were punishments,
which
if we needed to, we would because that
is technically part of our power exchange. But,
man, it has to be real fucking egregious
to get to that damn point at this
point in our relationship. Yes.
So I was I was like, well, okay.
We're doing this. And Mhmm. So first, I
had the content creator wannabe educator pat on
and went, but, woah. We didn't actually talk
about this. And when we did talk about
it, but we didn't talk about it right
ahead of time. Well, I guess that's good.
We're a long term relationship. We could do
this. I wouldn't recommend that for everybody. No.
That is how my mind works.
So yeah. Before before Dawn's out there, before
you go, like, setting up links for folks,
make sure you've had the conversation.
But JB was able to set everything up
without my input because
you just took what things we already do
or we're trying to do and just made
them electronic essentially. Right. Okay. So let's talk
about what the Obedience app is, like, what
its main function is, and then we'll get
into all that. So
and I got this paraphrasing, but straight from
there, about page where you can actually, like,
read a little bit more. But this is
the essential thing. Dom's can set and track
tasks for their submissives. Correct.
Submissives can earn rewards based on the amount
of points they have. Mhmm. They can air
quote earn
discipline, but it's k.
Based on what you do or don't do.
So for everything
you tap off that, yes, I did the
thing, you gain a an amount of points
that is set by the Dom. Mhmm.
And I have learned
not when you don't do the thing, because
today was the first day I didn't do
the thing by the time, but I've done
the thing every fucking day since we started
using this app. But if you do not
do it by the time deadline set, you've
lost your fucking point. Sucks to be you.
Anyway, I'll get into that in a minute.
For anybody who is curious,
yes. You can have multiple partners,
and use this app. The way they say
it on the website is the tasks you
see are your tasks. You're not gonna see,
like, the whole, like, all the different partners
stuff. You're gonna see yourself. Just yours.
And you can use it as switches
because, again, you see your part as, like,
the Dom, what you're
looking at for yourself, and then you see
the things that are being tracked for you
on the sub side.
So, yes, you can do that.
And, yeah, points can be earned
or taken away. Yeah. All. Yeah. Yeah. That's
the name of the game.
The the basic version, the free version that
we've used,
you can you set habits, you set punishments,
you set rewards. There is a limit to
how many, habits you they call them habits,
habit tracking, but it could be task. Call
it what you want.
I think they really personally, I think they
call it habit tracking so that the,
the app stores
don't ding them too much. Yeah. Yeah. It's
like, yeah, it's a habit tracker.
And,
yes, but also Okay. So in in the
free version five
Okay. Because when you pay for it, I
think it's unlimited. Unlimited. Yes. Mhmm.
And
the sis the way we have it set
up with the free,
when I tap off that, yeah, I did
the thing by
you know what? Yeah. By the deadline,
I get a little, like, pop up thing,
and it says, good girl. And it tells
me how many points I've gotten for that
thing. I'm, like, check kind of checking off
that I've done.
And and JB has it set. So he
gets notifications. Like, as with any app, you
can turn off notifications. I I don't recommend
that if you want to remember shit. I'm
just saying.
So when I, you know, mark the thing
as completed, JB gets a notification. Yep. And
sometimes I get a surprise extra,
good girl via text, which
I'm not mad about.
I'm not mad about. So
do you wanna walk us through what you
like, what we've set up or what you've
initially set up and how you decided on
the points Mhmm. Kinda thing and all that.
You know,
now let me just kinda
start from here. When when I set this
up, we
something
in the morning,
one of the things
do is put her collar on. Yeah. We're
back we're making that a habit again because
we've kinda fallen into it. Gotten out of
that habit.
Sometimes she would remember. Sometimes I would remember.
And prior to that, nobody was remembering. And
literally, sometimes the only time I wore a
collar in a given week was when we
were streaming.
Yeah. It was bad. Yep. So we were
developing a new habit. And,
you know, that then
led me to thinking about all our talk
about this. Mhmm. And
it's like, okay. What if I can set
this up?
That way, I remember Mhmm. Gives you imp
gives you impetus
to remember,
and we all move on. Right. And nobody
is we can talk about it, like, in
a check-in or just a regular conversation. Right.
But nobody is carrying around the brainpower that
you have to remember to do this thing.
Right. Yeah. Yeah. So and and that was
absolutely,
you know, the the main reason Mhmm. I
jumped on this. And and that's how I
set it up. Now
when I initially set it up, you know,
during
day we are up and about, you know,
I'm up by 06:00 in the morning
because the fur babies don't allow for anything
Much later. Much later. Yeah.
But,
you know, and you're not up you're up.
The alarm goes off at 06:30. You're awake,
but you're not I'm not up. Yeah.
So, you know, the the setting the time
at eight in the morning was not a
problem. Right. And it says, you know,
caller by 8AM. Mhmm. Essentially is what it
says on my task.
And
it it was very easy
to set that up. It asked you to
give it a a name, you you put
a name, and,
you know, then it allows you to pick
your days,
you know, and times and all that, and
very simple to walk through. Mhmm. And easy
to refine and edit as we Yeah. Lose
later. Right.
And,
you know, I I set it up. She
got the thing and and away we went.
Mhmm.
And in all honesty, it has been
it it has become a helpful tool. Oh,
absolutely. It has become a helpful tool for
us. Folks, you can't remember as well as
we once could. Yeah.
Yeah. I too much, hard drive is full.
I need a Mhmm. Swiss cheese brain. Just
saying.
So here's a a quirk I learned. I
was just complaining about this a few minutes
ago. So
JB said to me verbally, the 8AM, I
only care about Monday through Friday. The weekends,
it doesn't matter. Okay. Cool.
Well,
two things.
One,
I was doing it daily before the 8AM.
Yeah.
But I was not always
remembering
to go in and tap
the thing to to indicate I done it
prior to 8AM. And what I quickly learned,
it took me a minute because I was
watching. Every time I tap that I've completed
something, if
it's something, if it's by the deadline that
is set Mhmm. The little circle is is
it's a little white circle, and it's it
shows that it's done. If you miss your
deadline,
you get an x.
Not my favorite. Yeah. So there were some
days I mean, up until, like, even, I
think, last week, it was still happening on
occasion where I was not yet in the
habit to go in by the time that
was set on a weekday. Excuse me. And
I had learned after a couple weeks that
JB didn't care
what time the collar went on on the
weekend, but I was not getting the points
that were due to Right. So at that
point, I dug into the app again, and
I realized I could set a set it
for
the week, Monday through Friday, and then have
the weekend as its own Yep. Little time.
Yep. And I the way you have it
set up is every day that I I
showed that I have gotten the collar on
on time, it's eight it's one point.
There have been other things that were more
points, which is cool. I like that. I
like that, you know, some activities, that's just
that's the point. That's just basic. Right? Some
things are a little bit extra, and I
am a fan.
I was mentally preparing this morning, like, while
eating my breakfast. I am mentally preparing for
today's live streaming episode because we decided this
topic two weeks ago. And I was like,
yes. I can't wait to tell them how
this is working out. But the thing I've
had to work through the most for an
early morning completion
is remembering to go into my app Mhmm.
To complete the task. And I was gonna
say prior to this morning
that I had remembered
every day to put the collar on. I
just
until
today
until today until
fucking the day we're supposed to talk about
it,
08:08
in the morning, I'm like,
I walk back into the bedroom,
and I see my collar,
and I grab it.
And I thought you were already so there's
a story here. Yeah. I thought JB was
already out in the shop, and I was
like, oh my god. I'm good. I mean,
I'm literally slack jawed because I was so
proud of myself
thirty seconds prior.
I think I'm gonna have to run out
to the shop and be, like, make him
stop working so I can get the damn
collar on. Thankfully, he's still
sitting at his desk, so no problem. But
why did I think he was in the
shop?
At some point at or right before, I
didn't look at the time. It was five
minutes it was 07:55.
Okay. JB, who is a who is a
great communicator,
he is
super fucking intelligent.
He is wonderful
on all levels.
This man
looked at me and said, at apparently five
till eight Mhmm.
That man, the morning has really gone by
fast. I can't believe it's almost 08:00. And
I'm not out in the shop. Like, it
was all centered around him being in the
shop. I gave him the most blank look
you could imagine. I'm like,
what?
What?
So at 08:08,
when I realized what the fuck happened,
he and I come to him. He goes,
well, I thought you would take my you
got my hint.
Hint. I'm trying to help you. I was
like, in what world was that? A hint?
A hint is,
baby girl, is there something that maybe you've
forgotten? Baby girls, there's something you still need
to do? Mm-mm. That'd be too easy. 08:00.
Deadline, 08:00. But I was supposed to understand
him talking about 08:00 in the shop, which
is not about me at all,
was supposed to be, bitch, you don't have
your collar on yet, and you're about to
legitimately lose a point.
Go get your collar.
Look. If if you out there
are like, oh, yeah. If I've gotten that
hint, I it totally yeah. I wouldn't know
what you're talking about.
I am so happy for you, but I
am not that bitch. Okay? I'm not
we were not we didn't say specifically caller.
We kept the the the example
very generic. But we were talking to kids
at dinner tonight, and the youngest goes,
you know, wouldn't it be nice if people
just, like, said what the hell they meant
so you didn't have to guess? And I
went, thank you, my child.
I've raised that one right.
Anyway And yet,
the oldest
Oh, was on your side completely? Mhmm.
I don't know where I went wrong with
that boy, but okay. Yeah. Anyway,
so the time my whole point to that
whole rant is if you set a time
for a task to be completed,
they meant that shit.
I have not certainly not on my side
as dismissive. There's no mechanism for me to
go, no. But really, I did the thing
at 07:30. I just forgot to come into
the app until 08:01, and they're not playing
y'all. I came into the app at 08:09,
and my opportunity
to show show that that was done was
already gone. There's Mhmm. Like, no leeway that
I found.
Now what I'm curious about on your end,
could you go back and give me those
points? I you know, I don't know. I
honestly don't know.
Okay. No. I don't need any.
No. Don't need that. But what yeah. What
we ended up doing for the weekend is
that's when we've we talked about it. Because
here's the thing.
We are not using this for me to
collect points. I have things I can trade
my points in for for a reward.
But at this moment in life, not in
general, not always, but at this moment in
life, I'm not really as reward driven. I
just kinda wanna get the shit done and
know it's done, and I want to carry
less
stuff in my brain that I have to
try and remember.
So on one hand, I kinda don't care
about the points. But on the other hand,
I am who I am and I don't
like to falsely
lose points. Are you kidding me?
Because you get, like I'm sure you can
set it for different time, but weekly, I
get, like, this notification that'll tell me how
many points I earned,
how many points I lost. And I'm like,
I'm only losing points because I'm not tapping
the thing
on time. And prior to today, JB was
like, I know you're doing it, so I'm
not mad at you but I was like,
yeah, but I'm kinda pissy about this point
thing. It's not accurate.
So what did you learn when you went
in? I do not see anywhere I can
do that. Okay.
It does, you know, each day it shows
me what you've done. I get a daily
summary. And then it also gives a week
weekly and monthly Mhmm. Summary. Mhmm. Alright.
Which is which is kinda cool. It tells
me what you've earned, what you've lost, you
know, goals reached, different things like that. That
lost thing is bullshit is all I'm saying.
Yeah. Today was the first day I genuinely
lost. I mean, we did we did talk
about that a little bit. You know, there
there is
to me, that's a little bit of a
imperfection. I mean a few times Right. If
you could go in as the DOM and
fix it, I think that would be fine.
I think I'd be cool with that. And
I might be able I wonder if that
is a Maybe a premium feature? Premium feature.
Okay. So Because I know one of the
other things with the premium feature, you can
now also,
set it for,
photo proof.
Yes. That is yeah. For that Mhmm. So
we are together so often. There's no way
he doesn't know if I haven't done something
Correct. You know, after I say that I've
done it in the app. But if something
has to be done while y'all are apart,
maybe you're already long distance, the photo thing
would probably come in very, very handy. As
somebody who sent proof of a photo proof
of the panties I was wearing every day
that we were long distance. Mhmm. The only
no. Look. We are we are living in
the twenty first century and we know how
these things go.
I think it is perfectly legit if you're
like, I am not putting up nakey photos
of myself
on this fucking app. I think that's fair.
I think that's fair. I think that's fair.
Definitely can you know, think about your own
sense of privacy and security. We know that
apps, like, get fucked with more often than
we would like. So Mhmm. You know,
make it as anonymous as you can if
you choose to use that. But I could
see that being a really, really handy tool
when you are long distance or just are
not physically together to see that the thing
was done. And it's a visual that you
have to be able to see to really
know that it was done.
I think if you have strong enough trust
in one another and, like, legit,
you don't need photo break. If JB was
out of town for a week
at one, we would turn off the collar
thing. But if he was out of town
for a week, I could still go
in and tap the, yes, I folded the
laundry to get my two points for that
because that's a weekly task. Mhmm.
And,
he he wouldn't doubt that because I wouldn't
give him a reason to doubt
that. Right.
So after you set up the daily thing
with with my collar, because that was a
habit we were actively actively, like, trying to
make a thing. And it was very, like,
all over the place.
Then you set up a random task Yes.
That was not, like, it was a one
off do thing. One off one time thing.
I we had we had become the recipient
of
pizza dough,
fresh homemade pizza dough. Mhmm. And
From an Italian bakery. From Italian bakery. Where
nonnas are making
the dough. That's all I'm saying. Yeah.
Yeah. That was some good shit. Mhmm.
And,
I really wanted to make
pizza from scratch. I had no idea how
to
achieve that. Mhmm. So I assigned her the
task
to find me a good pizza recipe. Mhmm.
Now he intended to come talk to me
about it after he had done it. But
sometimes, I'm actually on top of my game.
Yeah. So the Obedience app is literally when
I think, other than text messages and voicemail,
I don't let notifications come through on my
phone
for anything.
Except the Obedience app because I'll I need
a reminder.
What I like about that, my collar,
I know it has to be on by
8AM. I will certainly remember now that I
fucked it up today.
But I haven't note I set the time
of my notification. It pops up at seven.
So if I happen to be lying in
bed still and have not actually, like, started
moving yet, I'm like,
That's impetus. I need to get my ass
out of bed so I get this done
in time. Mhmm.
Apparently, that was a two birds one stone
situation.
Jimmy was like, I'm kinda tired of you
rolling out of bed later and later. Look,
look, this is a 45 year old
engine and transmission.
Okay? It has to be warmed up. Also
cooled off because it overheats very easily. And
it takes me a minute to get out
of, like, a mess in the morning. Anyway.
But two words, one stone. So that worked.
So
so I've got notification. The moment he assigned
something poof that notification pops up.
So at first I looked at it and
I had this
jittery moment of uh-oh.
When is this due? What does this mean?
Like I got like, for half a second,
I let myself feel overwhelmed that wasn't really
warranted. It was just like, oh, I wasn't
expecting this.
But
I still liked that because it meant the
moment he thought of a thing he wanted
me to do, he didn't have to try
and remember it
or try and meet up with me and
Exactly. He just put it in. And then
I could go in and it was like,
when is my deadline? Because I had understood
by at that point, you could set deadlines.
And JB
was who he always is. It was a
very generous deadline. Like, I think I got
the thing on, like, a Friday or Saturday.
Yeah. And the deadline was, like, for the
following Monday at 5PM or something.
It was plenty of time. Mhmm.
And what was really nice about that was
I had, like, a quiet moment probably thirty
minutes before that notification aft after that notification
came in, and I just went and did
it,
wrote up a very detailed email with links.
Mhmm.
And here and then
sent it, checked the thing off as done.
JB didn't see his notifications. He comes to
me and he goes,
so there's a task, like, twenty minutes after
I've done this.
So there's a task I've assigned to you.
And I go, I know. The response is
in an email in your inbox. He goes,
oh. I was like, look. You're a little
sad. Like, it is done.
Look. Look.
I was firing on all cylinders.
Okay?
I was on it. It was it was
like 35 year old me. Okay? Mhmm.
And that I like that because,
you know, I had that that initial, like,
uh-oh, how quickly? Then I could just go
fucking look and calm myself down. Then because
I had that extra time, but it was
I had the time I needed more time
than I needed.
I was able to the pressure was off.
And sometimes
when JB assigns a task verbally, even if
he tells me, you I don't need it
right now. You know, let me know tomorrow
or whatever. There's a pressure to remember. There's
a pressure to get it done. And then
there's the very real fear that I'm it's
I'm gonna forget about it. And if I
don't remember to write it down, it's gone.
It doesn't exist anymore.
This has alleviated a lot of that.
Then so that's a one off. Now it's
still sitting in our list. I'm sure you
could remove it if you want to. I'm
sure. Yeah. It's not one I'll need to
do again. Right.
So here's the thing. It talks about being
a habit tracker,
talks about, you know, assigning tasks is essentially
what it is. But we are definitely talking
about some
behavior
modification
slash,
like,
an assist for when
you you just got a Swiss cheese brain
and you're not gonna remember shit.
Also, I'm a goal oriented girl. You give
me a deadline look. I might slide in
Under the burrito. Thirty seconds right before Yeah.
But a deadline works for me. That kind
of air quote pressure,
I I used to say I thrive under
pressure. And what it meant was I work
real, really well when I know I've got
a deadline and no fucking time left. I
can get shit done,
because
I think it's I think it's neurodivergency,
but I don't actually know.
So a thing that we
had something that had been happening more and
more, JB washes. Like, he gets the clothes
in the washer. He gets them in the
dryer. He puts them in the basket. My
job is to fold and put away. Yep.
And some weeks, again, firing on all cylinders.
Yep. And some weeks, it's later and later.
And it there was we were getting to
the next Saturday when it was time to
wash Yeah. Clothes. Mhmm. And I hadn't put
away last Saturday.
Yeah. Something need to change. Yeah. So at
first,
it started off with, okay, have it done
by Wednesday. And that was verbal. And I
knew. And I I was I was walking
around with it in my head understanding
that I had to get it done by
Wednesday. There was no question about that. Mhmm.
But then at some point,
you made it a task. I I you
know, I
told you that, and then I was like,
a little,
what am I doing?
Right. What am I doing? We have the
technology.
Right. And and I just put it in
the app. Mhmm. And now you're for that.
Well and here is the realization
that I've come to about myself and I've
explained it to JB. And when he does
not remember six weeks from now, I'll explain
it again.
Because I don't expect him to remember, like,
every single one of my fucking quirks. That's
too much for a person. No. Nobody. No.
I barely remember
them all. And it's that some
weeks,
some days, I'm on top of it. Everything
is working as it should.
I have energy. I have motivation. I if
I'm a rolling stone, if I start, I
can gather no fucking moss, y'all. I got
this.
And so there are some
weeks where I've got it done before, like,
by the weekend. I'm just like, yeah. I
can do this. Mhmm. And then there are
some weeks where, I don't know, the dopamine
is low, the hormones are raging. I don't
know. I don't know. What do I
what do I blame it on? I don't
know.
And I thank God for the deadline because
I will get something done by a deadline.
I'm I'm wired that way. That's part of
who I am.
So
JB to encourage
the,
the part of me that loves a gold
star point whatever,
and we both understand the importance of positive
reinforcement. We have we have talked about it
on this podcast Yeah. Before.
If I get it done early, like, early,
early, like, it's still the weekend when it
should be put away if you're capable of,
you know, all your brain cells firing together.
I get an extra I get that extra
good girl text. Like, I get extra acknowledgment,
and I
love that.
But the first time he
like, that happened and he acknowledged it. We
then talked about it later. And that's when
I had to say, look,
I like that I could do this this
week.
I also like knowing
that if next week's a bad week, the
there's no false pressure. It's just
Wednesday at 5PM is the deadline. And Mhmm.
And please understand, some weeks I need that
deadline and some weeks I don't. Right. Past
two weeks, I haven't. I've just gotten it
done. Just gotten it done. I don't know.
So,
we have
used the basics.
So far, we have not needed the extra
features.
Every every
few days, a or not a notification. A
thing pops up when you go into the
Obedience app. App. It's like, oh, wouldn't you
like to do the premium? And they will,
you know, sometimes they're offering, like, 50% off
every so often. So we will at some
point. I'm sure I'm sure we will at
some point if we because what I'm finding
is,
you know, this is a great tool that
does not require either of us to use
extra brainpower.
Mhmm. Like, there's no walking around constantly, like,
on a on a tab that I can't
see, but I'm repeating my list to myself
over and over again to try to remember
things or that panic of, wait. Was there
something I'm forgetting?
You know? I like that I can set
my notifications
for each task
to arrive when I need them so that
I I get that. I also like that
I I think it's because I don't have
a lot of notifications set on my phone.
This is that doesn't feel overwhelming to me.
For anybody who feels maybe a little overwhelmed
by the supercomputer
that is supposedly a phone, who talks on
those? Whatever.
The best thing I ever did for myself
was to turn off all unnecessary
notifications.
All of them. Because it was I I
would get so distracted. It was not a
dopamine rush. It was I was angry Every
time I don't know if the case was
going through.
But it means that I'm more aware
Mhmm. With the obedience app. Yeah.
But I like that I'm I'm not worried
about forgetting all of the time or
going back and going, wait. I know you
wanted me to do that thing. Mhmm. And
when did I need to do that thing?
Right.
So that that has been the the best
part of this. I think that's a, you
know, an aging thing. Those of us who
don't have a fucking memory, neurodivergency,
any of that. Business logs. I am curious.
Can you go into the app and see
how many points you have accumulated?
Yes. I also have
some more notifications. Did you do something in
there? Yeah. I was poke I've been poking
around. Yeah.
Yeah. And,
okay. So I can I go into my
little thing? I go into activity.
I go into my reward history.
No.
Weekly summary,
and I can look at weekly and monthly.
The month of July, I earned 37 points.
I lost five.
Yeah.
Let's see. Account.
Can I see, I'm still learning some of
this stuff because
I I do this with every app I
have? I use it for what the hell
I need it for and not a fucking
thing other than that.
Oh, yes. When I go into my rewards
tab,
I can see that I have 42 points.
Okay. Now we were talking about earlier if
I can add or
and
on my point here Mhmm. I can add
or remove points. You can give me extra
points. Yes.
I'm good. I don't need that.
I can see that. Know a couple weeks
ago. Anyway,
there is a chat feature. We have not
used it because we are side by side
all day long. If there's something that needs
to be said, we'll say it. Alright. It's
fine.
Oh, yeah. You were playing. My notifications,
Southern sir has added one reward point. Southern
sir has subtracted one reward point.
Okay. I mean, a little freebie. Look at
me talking about it and, you know, being
mostly coherent. That that might
that might mean,
you know, that might be worth a point
or two. I'm just saying.
I had some points I was gonna make.
No. At those points, I had some things.
Did I write them down in my notes?
Oh, I hope so. No. I didn't. I
left it very generic so we could say
whatever we needed to say.
Oh, that's what it was because it's been
on my mind the past couple weeks.
So
I love the way we're using it. It
it has allowed us to to
do things that we already know we wanna
do or have done,
within our power exchange and be consistent. Right?
Mhmm. There's been the tweaking, like, changing it
from a timed thing of having my collar
you know, bringing my collar to JB is
essentially what I'm doing before 8AM.
And that went from every day by 8AM
to Monday through Friday. You know, we we
adjust as we need to go on. It
it's no different than
negotiating face to face per se. It's just
tech it's technological, and it's there for you
to look at whenever you need to. Correct.
But the other thing, I have not brought
this up to Jamie because I've not been
in the headspace for it. Uh-uh. But
when I've had moments of clarity
and enough dopamine to function
and enough serotonin,
I've had these thoughts about
how we could incorporate other things, and here's
the example that came up. And then I
it's made me spiral. So then I started
thinking about it. So let's let's talk about
it now. Alright. I'll spiral later.
If you are
a long time,
cricket
or you've gone through the archives,
you've probably heard us a few times over
literal ten years
talk about how
at different points in our power exchange, we
would try to incorporate
me trying to be a healthier human being
and doing things I need to do and
not doing things I don't need to do
into our Power Exchange. And every time it
fizzled, it flopped, it was never sustainable. Crashed
and burned. Just you know, I I needed
the accountability. JB didn't have the
it wasn't a thing that was important enough
to him. Like, it wasn't he wasn't driving
it. And also, if I wasn't driving it
with my own, like, ambition to be a
good girl,
like, it was easy for both of us
to go and it fizzled.
And I started thinking about, wait, What
if I started including
habits
that I do want to have and things
I do want to do, but I know
me
for whatever reason?
There can be one person on the planet
who I let tell me what to do.
I actually, I'm open to more than one,
but it's it's tough job to get. So
I get, like, it's fine. There's no line
out my door. I got one. I'm good.
His name is JB. Okay. And I've lost
you.
And so I thought about bringing that to
you because
Mhmm.
If that was a thing I was serious
about pursuing
Right.
The only, like, effort on your part is
in the setup.
And then you don't have to think about
is she doing the thing
thing, is she not? Your
notifications will tell you. Right. And I can
have that false, like, air quote pressure
of,
wait. You don't like losing brains.
Right.
You like having a deadline and this is
it's artificial. Like, we're
you know, we have free will. We can
ignore whatever we want, but it works for
me.
Maybe that's an option. And then
I got all of it in my head.
There was a spiral.
The,
the feel good
hormones and brain chemistry tanked for, like, two
weeks. And I haven't gone back to it.
But it was it got me thinking about
for other people who this app or an
app like it y'all,
that, you know, sounds like it might be
a good tool for you. Those things that
you keep saying to one another, you keep
having these conversations of, oh, we really wanna
do this. And then it fizzles out because
maybe it requires too much mental energy to
keep up with.
It you know,
one or both of you are like your
memory is faulty and it's easy to forget
stuff and it's really hard to change habits.
I the collar is meaningful and important to
me. I was pissed that I forgot it
today because this I'm
Today was the first fucking day. The whole
time. That you genuinely forgot it. Right. But
the thing I don't care about
is doing shit on apps on my phone.
Right?
So that's actually been the harder
part is is to remember to go into
my app at a certain time. But the
task, the activity because that part is meaningful
to me
knowing that it's there that I'm I'm accountable
in that way. Mhmm.
That's where the drive kind of comes from
of, oh, yeah. I will definitely get this
done knowing that I've agreed to it. It's
what I want. And
I'm not relying on my memory. I'm not
even I'm
I'm I am relying on my own willpower,
but also
no. I don't know if that would make
sense to anybody else. I have free will.
I have willpower. I can do what the
fuck I wanna do. Consent,
you know, means something. But also,
I am a service sub who is desperate
to be a good girl. You if you
are my trusted person person who's allowed to
tell me what to do, everybody else, I
have a whole you don't tell me what
to do and will purposely not do a
thing that somebody I don't want to tell.
Like, I I'll fuck myself over. But JB
can do it. So it's like,
if that, like, that
thing doesn't feel like willpower. It is. It
doesn't feel like
a thing I control. It is.
But it's ingrained in me in some way.
And so then I does am I making
any goddamn sense? Probably not.
Anyway.
Yeah. It got me thinking about things that
we could add. It got me thinking about
the reasons
it
feels like it works. I'm
also old enough, mature enough, something enough to
know that
a thing can work right now and there
can come a point down the line it
doesn't work anymore. Right now, it works really
fucking well. Yeah. And I can see where
I want to For both of us, actually.
Right. Because it's there's a level of pressure
that's not there anymore. There's a level of
angst and anxiety. It's probably too strong of
a a word. Mhmm.
I don't know what's lighter than that.
But I know how I feel when I'm,
one, trying to remember things and I I
get overwhelmed and anxious not because there's so
much to do, because it's so much to
fucking remember.
And how I feel when I can't remember
a thing that is important to me
because that's not how like first like
your feelings of it if it's a thing
you've had to live with
are your feelings I don't I can't relate.
The feeling I have is remembering how I
used to mind like a steel trap y'all.
You told me something I could fucking remember
it. Was my process, like, not good? I
was I was making myself anxious by my
process. Sure. But I could remember shit. And
now I'm at a point in life I
cannot remember shit and it's a it fucks
with me. So to have some of that
pressure
off
and some of that
angst, I don't think that's the right word,
but it's what I got.
That
is freeing. That is refreshing. That makes it,
you know, there's less
bad pressure and less stress over things that
I do want to be doing
because the stuff that makes it difficult, the
remembering,
the mental energy, all of that,
that's taken away with the way we're using
this app.
Is that
And,
I just learned I could remove the,
the one time. Okay. That would make sense
that you would. Yeah. Now
when you go in there and and and
you select that
particular task,
you then tap and you get a drop
down menu. Mhmm.
One of the options in there,
in addition to deleting the task, is to
archive it. Oh, okay. Okay. So you apparently
have it. Right. It's just not It's just
not visible.
That is only available in premium.
Okay. Okay. So so at that point with
the free, the only option to get rid
of that is then to delete it completely.
And it seems that if you were to
archive Mhmm. A task
that you weren't using, you could go in
and reactivate it. Oh, okay. If it came
up again. Mhmm. Oh, that's not see, the
more you're telling me about the premium because
I in the premium, I know it was
unlimited habits Right. And it was photos. I
I knew that off the top of my
head. Literally, every almost every time I go
on the app, the
the blurb of the ad of do you
wanna join premium comes with a list of
things, but those are the two things that
stuck in my head Mhmm. That you definitely
get. Yeah. It wouldn't do it because it
already did it once for me. But, yeah.
I like the
I like how much we're getting done without
paying a dime. Yeah. You know, for basic
stuff. For for basic stuff, it is an
app that you can pick up and start
using in your dynamic. Very sim very easily.
And, you know, you are the more savvy
one with both technology and online stuff. So
I would be surprised if you couldn't open
this up, set it up, and start doing.
I can get easily confused.
And I opened the app and immediately was
able to start tapping around and everything made
sense. It's for me, it was simple enough.
It didn't like, I wasn't overwhelmed. I was
not confused. Now Right. If JB had set
20 tasks and 85 rewards and 13 punishments,
that would have been overwhelming.
We started with one thing. Just like everything
else, we talk about you start slow. Yep.
And that's what that's what it did. Started
slow with one thing.
And
Lola is very opinionated today.
And the way we're using it, it's not
the stuff that is so ingrained in the
routine that there's no question, am I gonna
get it done? Making JB's coffee, getting the
bed ready, some of those things, those are
not in, in the app. We do not
use it for that. Those those are things
that at this point in our relationship that
it is so ingrained.
And, yes, there's kind of a time
requirement there, but it's like
JB wants his coffee before he's gone out
to the shop.
Even if I somehow for air quote, forget
to make coffee, I can make the coffee
in time. It's not something we're trying to
track or change habits on or, you know,
create a reward system for after all these
years. It does not need to go in
there. It it's these one offs. It's these
things where I am clearly
struggling
Yep. To remember to create the habit because
Lola
agrees.
I've never been able to easily create a
habit. Like, I I'm coming to terms with
that. Like, it used to be a guilt
thing and now I'm like, oh,
it's the wiring. It's it's the wiring.
If the engine and transmission are kinda, like,
old and need to warm up,
the computer
processing part of the car,
it it probably needs to be replaced. Like,
you need to put me up on the
thing and hook me up so the error
codes can come up. You know?
And trying to develop habits, if it's not
something I'm physically doing every single day without
fail and God was probably reminded of every
day for, like, two months when I first
started.
And even now, I I can kind of
go, oh, yeah. I was supposed to do
that.
This takes that away. This is, you know
Oh. It does take it away. It makes
it easier. God dang it, Lola. Silent. Silent
said, Lola Lola knows a thing about obedience.
That's where she's speaking out. That girl ain't
a good girl.
She is for her daddy. I mean, as
am I, but that's
we were sitting in this office today.
JB is taking a nap.
I'm sitting on one end.
Lola's on that, and she starts crying like
she's been abandoned and would not hear me.
Did not care that I was in that
room with her. Anyway, that's that's a side
tangent that is not about this Yeah. No.
Topic.
That's what the bonus section is for.
So, yeah. I you know, the people I'm
thinking of, if
you are drawn to this idea, if it
seems like it can be helpful,
are, you know, very busy folks who already
have plenty of shit to remember and you
need to free up some disk space.
Any anybody with memory issues for whatever the
reason might be.
And for Dom's out there who want to
help your sub do these things, but you
are overwhelmed
by trying to keep track of what you're
supposed to be doing and when.
You know? If it's an app or if
it's, like, a fucking Google Doc, like, whatever
method, like, get it the thing I've learned
about myself is get it out of my
brain and into
another,
for you know, format
that works for me that I'm go I'm
willing to access. My phone,
it's with me more often than it should
be. I mean, I there are times I
shouldn't put the fucking thing down. I'd get
more work done.
But the phone is always fucking there.
I'm being I'm being called out online
in chat.
Because you try to keep two
girls
as good girls, and one gets to be
told she's a good girl more than the
other,
I bet you could guess who it is,
and it's not
me.
Anyway, I'm not bitter. She's a dog, and
I love her.
But I do notice. I do notice.
So yeah. Yeah. We we took our sweet
ass time getting to the obedience because you
know what? There was a time we did
not need anything like this. We didn't we
didn't think we would need something like that.
It didn't it didn't interest. And and then
we had our little
Yeah. I think there if we had tried
to do it over the past few years
prior to this year, I think we would
have overwhelmed ourselves with Yeah.
Trying to do something that that we were
not in a headspace to
celebrate. I think it would have felt like
yet another obligation,
and that's not what you want
your power exchange to feel like.
You're supposed to want to do this. You
know, you might, like, look. Look. Let's be
real,
service subs out there.
Sometimes
I real I look. Look. Left to my
own devices, I don't think I'd ever fold
another fucking piece of laundry.
But for my daddy,
I can I can do all the chores?
It has given me back some confidence Mhmm.
Because okay. So the laundry thing
so not only
prior to all of this, prior to using
the app, prior to getting the deadline, blah
blah blah,
not you know, the laundry would take
a week sometimes before I would fold it,
and that was just, like, under duress because
Jimmy was like, I really need the basket
now. Thank you.
Or my favorite, baby girl, I have run
out of underwear. Could you?
Like, it's falling apart.
For the record, that only happened one time.
But folding sheets
is my fucking nemesis. I don't know what
it is about sheets. I'll fold towels all
day long. That is very easy. I think
that's what it is. Towels, easy sheets, bane
of my existence. Mhmm. But
ever since we started using
the app
to like, for me to track, you know,
yes. I've done the laundry. The sheets get
folded
most of the time the very same day.
I just do it all. Sometimes it's like
the next day because the main the points
are for the
daily like, the regular laundry sheets don't have
their own points.
I'm good with that. It's fine. I don't
need the pressure.
But as I've gained in, like, the confidence
of, oh, yeah. I'm doing this.
I can do other things that I have
struggled with. With. It's not major. It's not
mind blowing.
But, you know, I I kinda I kinda
like that
feeling. You know?
So,
anyway
so, yeah, I guess it's safe to say
overall, we are pro obedience app. Mhmm. Yep.
Yep. And I have another,
task I'm gonna be adding in there shortly
for you. Okay.
I need you to do some research for
me. Okay. Probably the thing I would say
to anybody who's considering it,
do not add anything first of all, unless
you're like
your relationship is long term enough, strong enough,
enough trust, and you've at least had one
conversation about using the fucking app, do not
do a fucking thing without talking to one
another
first. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.
No. No. No. Also,
unless you're brand new to a power exchange
and you were, like, newly negotiating things, I
would start with shit you're already trying to
do, but maybe there's a struggle. Right. Maybe
it's been difficult for some reason.
Mhmm. And, yeah, like JB said earlier, start
slow. Like,
get used to it. Get, like, into a
rhythm of using it. But you still have
to negotiate like you always did.
This time though, because it's so easy to,
like, add things, add things, do not overwhelm
yourself either side of the slash. It's um-mm.
Um-mm. Um-mm. Um-mm. Don't just don't do it.
Please please please for the love of all
that is
kinky and fucked up,
do not just assign shit you've never talked
to your partner. No. No. No. No. Like,
we have that ability where JB can just
assign a task, like a research or a
look this up or whatever, because that's the
nature of our relationship. He doesn't have to
come negotiate with me every time he wants
to give me
a one off task.
But if y'all don't have that, no no
no no no no. Don't add anything you
hadn't talked about.
Just saying. I just may have come across
a a a hack
for your sheep problem.
I did see somebody say just roll them
up in a ball. Panda rolls them up
and puts them in a pillowcase.
I so
the one that I want to roll up
and kind of mostly do
is the fitted sheet.
We are old. Apparently, the younger kids don't
do this. We do use a top sheet.
If you don't, that's one less thing you
gotta fall.
Lola,
goddamn it, girl.
It's it's really it's really the the fitted
sheet. There's some it's just tedious and it's
boring and who gives a fucking
And the sheets aren't doing anything to anybody
sitting off in the corner over there. So
does it even matter? Does it even matter?
So, yeah, she's
she's fussy. Yep. So, yeah, we are pro
obedience app. Do I think it's for everybody?
Of course not. Mhmm. But for anybody who's
been, like, looking for a tool,
you could try this one. It's free. Yeah.
So yeah. Now I'm I'm curious about one
thing. You have 42 points Uh-huh. But you
haven't cashed anything in for your rewards. Right.
Because,
I've been getting myself diet. Okay. So my
rewards for me,
Diet Coke Mhmm. Special coffee,
movie, animated movie. Right? Movie of my choice.
I've been getting my own damn Diet Cokes
whenever the hell I please.
Also we haven't had full access to the
car with
the oldest having to go to campus every
single day. That's about to end, so whatever.
Buying special coffees does not feel like a
financially responsible decision. Well, not right now.
At at the time I set it up,
it was It it was a little different.
Oh, okay. You know, but right now in
this time point in time, time, no. Goddamn
the summer slump.
But the third
But okay. So
I used to be a person who could
not function if there the TV was not
on in the background. I wouldn't necessarily watch
it. I just always had something on, and
I was, you know, interested in what might
be coming out. I don't know what it
is because I, there are movies I enjoy.
There are shows I enjoy but sometimes
something about,
one, something about watching a show or a
movie feels like pressure. Like I'm committing to
something and I'm not watching a show or
a movie feels like pressure. Like, I'm committing
to something and I'm not ready to commit.
Two,
sometimes
it's I don't think I could focus on
that if you paid me
to. And so
and then three, sometimes I I forget that
movies exist and that you can sit down
on your couch and watch your TV and
you can do like, I just it's so
not in my fucking head.
So,
like, you know, which one is it?
It changes minute by minute. May the odds
be ever in your favor. Mhmm. But some
of it is a little out of sight
out of mind.
So it's a sign.
But, yeah, I could I could I could
cash them. Mhmm. I I know. Mhmm.
So, yeah, I I like the app. Mhmm.
It,
it definitely helps.
Yeah.
Yeah. It's
it's been refreshing to use because it feels
like we're getting somewhere. We're getting forward movement
on things we wanna get forward movement on.
Exactly. Makes sense. Lot less effort, if that
makes sense. Mhmm. So anyway,
I think Excuse me.
I still remember how to burp babies from
all those years ago if you, you
know, need me to get that whole technique
out. Now you'll have to sit on the
edge of my leg, and you'll have to
lean forward while I hold your chin and
neck steady. And then I will I will
go back and forth between rubbing and patting
your back, but I'll keep your torso upright
and you will just but I'll have a
washcloth over my hand like one of those
soft cloths. So if you spit up, it
will be on my hand.
I don't know if I can remember how
to,
change a diaper at this point because last
time I did that was,
god, how old is the youngest? Almost 16.
It looks
like 14
ago.
I'll, pass on that thing. The burping? Because
that the when I learned that technique, it
was fucking life changing.
So I still remember it. So I got
a baby that needs burp. I can do
it.
Anyway.
So
yeah.
So,
are we good? As good as we'll ever
get. We're going to a bonus section. Okay.
Okay.
Keep it kinky, y'all. And we'll see you
next week.
Daddy.
Yes, baby girl. Can we talk about crickets
now? What do you think we've been doing?
No. No. No.
About things that
can we have a reason for me to
go off on tangents and derail the whole
conversation with a thing that is not, like,
off topic? That's what the bonus section is.
Have at it. Thank you.
Now Silent does point out that, the app
does not work nearly as well when your
big d has ADHD and forgets to look
at it. That is very true.
For me as somebody who forgets to look
at shit, it the notifications
were kind of handy, but, I mean, that
yeah. You gotta kinda know know thyself.
If that's if that's gonna be another struggle,
then Mhmm. Yeah. Then it's not it's not
gonna work quite as well.
But
anyway, so
Lola
has what I call her satellite ears up.
She is listening hard. Oh, yeah. But she
is now, like, right next to you. Yeah.
Yeah. She's she's laying next to my chair.
Now that we're no longer on the the
topic,
she's quiet. She wanted to add in. She
had stuff to say.
So
what's been going on?
I've I've been deep in I I think
it's his latest book, Stephen King's Never Flinch.
What's it about?
Psycho killers.
Oh, now the song's in my head. I
can just hear the lyric psycho killer.
Yep. Psycho killer.
Yeah.
Got the synth in the background.
Oh
god.
Oh my gosh.
So,
yeah.
I know
days happened prior to the one we're in
now.
What have I done? I
we had
a very nice day out on Saturday. We
did.
We did. We,
yeah, we we did a lot of things.
And we we did errands, but we also
did fun stuff. And you were, like, in
your big d,
like,
element. You You planned everything. Planned the whole
day. And see, I'm used to
asking questions about what we're gonna do. And
when I say asking questions, not the anxiety
questions, the would you like to do this
or would you like to do that? And
so I was realizing we were gonna be
out all day. I was gonna get hungry.
So I just said, hey.
I'm sure we're gonna get hungry while we're
out today. We have a big day plan.
I was like, do you wanna grab we
have coupons on our refrigerator that come in
the mail. I was like, do anyway, I
already have that planned out. And I went,
oh.
Okay.
And did I get a little thrill? Was
I like, whoop. Yes. Yes. I did. Yes.
I did. It was delightful.
Now we were both on the same page.
I have gotten some
two so far, but we haven't gone back
to look for anything else.
Cute little, like,
dresses from some thrift shops. And the the
reason they got to come home with me,
one,
they looked like I you know, something I
would but when I put them on, they
fit fine and and nothing was itchy, scratchy,
pulling in a weird like, it was just
like it was fine. Right?
And so I had you know, I recognized
this was a special day. We were gonna
we're doing something other than just errands. And
in my head, I was like, I'll wear
one of my cute dresses. And I was
surprised JB.
But JB was in his, like,
dom self, like, he was feeling his dom
self. He goes,
before I you know, I wanted to surprise
him with I'm gonna, like, not look like
Adam Sandler.
He was over
there going, today when you're getting ready, I
want you to pick out one of the
dresses you just got. And I was like,
you ruined my surprise.
I
was gonna surprise you with that.
So but we did.
But, yeah, we went
Our town has a museum of art. Mhmm.
And we were not sure what to expect.
We know they do exhibits. We've seen the
ads for them. It was like a fucking
TARDIS. We walked in, and Yeah. For a
hot minute, it felt like it did not
end. It it does not look when you
roll up, it does not look very big.
No. It does not.
And, yeah, you you will step into there,
and it's,
huge.
And two floors. Two floor. I I was
tired by the time we got through, and
I was starting to get hangry.
I was like, I'm going
to be a sweet submissive
who's looking super cute and with her daddy.
But in my head, I was like,
I'm a need to eat soon. Yeah. I'm
a need to eat soon. It it was
tiring. And, yeah, it was a lot of
walking, but it was very cool. It was.
It was interesting. Really, really neat stuff in
there. There was one ex a photograph exhibit
we were walking through, and
JB said as we walked past, there was
a person there with their camera take taking
photographs.
Hey. We walked past. He goes, I think
that was the artist
taking photographs of us reacting to his photos.
Was like, so Yeah. Photograph Inception? Like, what
are we doing? Right. Okay.
Okay.
The live chat, because podcast listeners Yeah. You
would not have caught this, wants to know
why JP is on the floor and why
I'm ignoring it. Because he was with his
best good girl.
I was.
She, you know, normally around this time of
night, we're we're settling oh, Lola. Lola don't
knock over the tripod. Right?
She was on her back doing her
Oh, yeah. That big old thing. Mhmm.
And,
hang on. Let's see how much she moved
this stupid thing. Oh, yeah. Is our camera
even, like, onto oh.
Oh. So she was doing a wiggle thing,
and you went down to what? Like
Well,
I thought she needed to go out.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
So I had gotten up to to let
her out, and she was like, no. That's
not what I want. You got out of
the seat. Now you can give me attention.
And and, like, started walking back, and that's
when she
plopped down and rolled over on her back
and for belly rubs.
The, entire episode is just the Lola shout.
So
So Yeah. It was it was, the museum
was was really nice. I was
I was you know, I didn't think it
would be bad. I I'm good with museums,
like, going into but I was genuinely impressed.
There were some things that I guess they
kinda
have exhibits
most of the year. They they they they
have stuff that swap some of them out.
Right? They they have,
some exhibits that are
the main
part of the exhibit is there year round.
It it's,
was all mostly all donated by a local
family at some point. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
Until we even have a museum like that.
Open, I think, '87.
Yeah. Somewhere around there, maybe.
And,
but they also have,
you know, rotating
Exhibits. Exhibits. Mhmm.
So Mhmm. The one on the the I
do not remember the artist name anymore. Yeah.
It was not what it was fascinating. It
was not my style of art where I
was like, oh, I can't I have to
keep looking at this. But it was,
an abstract
of massive canvases. Oh, yeah. And as you
walk through the full exhibit, like, we're literally
walking through different periods of his artwork. And
the very first one is, mixed media, bright
colors, like,
you know, thank God they have the plaque
of what it's supposed to mean because I
was not I was not getting that meaning,
but I was like, okay. That's what it
means. And then we go into another section
where,
it was
the medium was
oh, god.
It was
I mean, the way I interpret it was
pencil, but, like, not pencil. Like, not number
two pencils, but, like, that kind of
Charcoal? Maybe. That's the word that keeps coming
to mind. Yeah.
And that that was
amazing. That that the talent he has there,
but, yeah, that was that was all really
cool. And then there were parts where I
didn't expect it. I was like
in
my podunk country brain
who did not, you know, only did museums
because, like, there was a school trip and
maybe that was once every three years to
a museum.
And you always had to, like, leave the
city to go find a museum, sometimes the
street.
I think of, like, air quote classic art
pieces as being, like,
in, like, New York, in London, like, in
the big city.
We were walking through some exhibits. I was
like, oh, I know I took art history
for two semesters in college. I don't know
why. I don't I don't know anything about
art. I'm not drawn to it.
Pun not intended.
And I'm walking through going, I think I
remember that style. I think I know how
that works. Wow. That looks like something that
I that we would have seen in the
British Museum.
Yeah. And they have you down there. Mhmm.
Mhmm.
And they have the gift shop. Yep. We
walked in the front door, never having been
in there. It clearly looked like Like deer
in the headlights. Headlights. Yeah. And the the
there are several people working the desk because
it was the the one day a month
where it's free to come in. You have
to pay The first the first Saturday of
every month, it's they offer free admission. And
we have spent
six years saying we need to go do
that. We finally did it. Finally did it.
But we walk in like deer in headlights
because we're like, where do we go? Where
do we start? What do you like? What's
this all about? Right. And it's kinda busy
because it's the free day. Everybody with a
child who's like They had food trucks outside.
Right. And they had a whole kids' art
section where they, like, could create art and
whatever. And so we're, like, looking around like,
what do we do? And one of the
people working on the desk was like, is
this your first time here? Mhmm. Yeah.
So, you know, she tells us She gave
us a map and explained everything. Yeah. And
then we just started walking. My feet hurt
so bad when we were done. Yeah. You
weren't really wearing shoes. I was wearing cute
shoes because I was wearing a dress. And
you look very cute, Luke. Cute. Very nice.
Yeah. That was that was a nice little
date. Mhmm. I enjoyed that. Yep.
So
And then I surprised you for lunch. Mhmm.
I'm an out of sight, out of mind
kinda girl. I didn't used to be that
way, but whatever I am now.
And so
past couple of times, we've talked about, like,
getting,
like, some, not all, weeks.
We want one night where we don't have
to think we don't have to make dinner.
We don't have to think about what it
is. We don't have to preplan it. We're
like, we'll go get drive through. We'll do,
like, something. We got coupons or something. And
I had said a couple times over the
past few weeks, like, oh, Popeye's would be
really good.
Popeye's would be really good.
But it was like, it's kind of out
of the way. It's not a place that's
like, we're gonna go run and grab something
real quick. It's it's not located there. And
then if I don't see it, I don't
I'm not thinking about it.
So
right before we left the museum, I was
like, if we're gonna eat, it's gotta be
soon because you girl's hungry.
He's like, okay. And I asked, where are
we going? Nope. Can't tell you. It's a
surprise.
Which, I mean, did that make my little
subby heart kinda like go pitter patter a
little bit?
Because I get frustrated when I don't know
stuff, but also it's a control thing. And
I'm like, okay. I'm here for it. Mhmm.
So every road he took and he took,
like, a a straight path. He wasn't trying
to, like Mm-mm. Like, you know, have me,
like, fool me. It was a surprise not
fooling. Right?
But every road we went down, I was
like, okay. Well, it could be this or
it could be that or it could be
this or it could be that. And then
he turned off the road. I'm like, oh,
it can't it can't be any of that.
And so I started thinking when we got
on the main road to get there, like,
may maybe. I was like, don't get your
hopes up. It could be there's all kinds
of places and you like all of them,
so it's fine.
He turns down the way that immediately I
was like, oh, this is the easiest way
to get there because you can, like, kinda
get out of the way of traffic and
everything.
But I still wasn't sure because there was
also a McDonald's right there. And a Mexican
restaurant. And a Mexican restaurant that I didn't
even know was there.
And he starts pulling in the Popeyes and
it's, y'all, it's fried damn chicken.
And I started squealing. I was like, yep.
Yep.
I guess you did. That's the best surprise
ever. Mhmm.
I couldn't I couldn't even eat all my
food. I didn't like,
you know, I've just been told to just
be in there and have the Popeye's rides.
Yeah. I'll be able to go another six
months to a year without it. Now that
I've had it, I'm good.
There is such a thing as too much
Popeye's.
Yeah.
But,
yeah. It was it was it was such
a small thing, but, oh, it was it
was so so cool. It made me so
happy. Yeah. It was a very, very nice
day. Mhmm. And we were out much all
day.
The kids
okay. So the youngest is like, please leave
the house. Never come back. Okay? Just keep
the Wi Fi on and the AC on.
I don't give a fuck. I I never
see you again. And snacks. Right. The oldest
was like,
first, we walk in and he looks at
me like I'm,
I don't know, like, a freak of nature.
I am wearing a dress. This is very
cute. He's like, where did you go? And
I it took me a minute to realize.
He was like, you are dressed the fuck
up. What has happened? I was like, well,
we went out. Yeah. I can see that
where?
I was like,
dude,
we go places when you're not living here,
but where did you go, mom? I was
like, I'm glad somebody cared that we were
not
glad somebody cared. I was like, oh, it's
the museum. And we had to go run
errands and we got lunch. And I was
like, oh, well, you could've just told me
that. I'm like
what he didn't say, what she clearly wanted
to go is, why were you dressed like
that? I'm only used to you looking like
Adam Sandler. What is happening?
It was nice. Mhmm. It was nice. Yeah.
We had a very nice time.
Yeah.
I think that's about it. Mhmm. Especially since
I literally do not remember the past two
days. That's a little scary.
Mhmm.
Oh, because I did a lot of driving
in my car. You did a lot of
driving in the morning. Was. You were road
weary. And yesterday, most of the work I
did was in the morning, and I sweated
through my shirt multiple times. I was only
out there for, like, thirty minutes. I'm, like,
I'm soaked. This is gross. Maybe that's why
I don't remember anything. I I cannot believe
I I mean, it needed to be done.
The big the our we have a huge
old growth,
Laurel Oak in the front yard.
Mhmm. And this,
early spring,
I had someone come in and do a
heavy, heavy trim. We were a few years
overdue for trimming. Yeah. I I had been
keeping it up as best I could in
between, but it needed, you know, more than
what I could,
do. So they came in, and they they
trimmed it up. They cleaned out dead wood
and lifted and everything.
But what that did does now the house
does not get as much shade. So much
more sunlight. And the garage heats up so
fast now in the morning.
Mhmm. Mhmm.
So And I was being a good little
shop elf. Yeah. I was drilling holes and
diabolical
stick stuff.
She was doing that while I was turning
handles. Because eventually, we'll have diabolical sticks back.
We'll meet in the middle. The kingcurrythekingcurry.com.
So on that,
we're probably done. Right? I think so. Yeah.
Yeah.
Thanks for
being here. Hanging out with us. Especially to
the bitter end. OMG. Y'all are real ones
for that.
See, I can see both on YouTube and
in podcast stats. I can see how long
people listen on average. I can also see
when the majority of people drop. Yeah. Fuck.
I try to look at that. That's a
little depressing.
Because see, you would look at that in
order to maybe change how you're doing things
and no.
If this can't be a podcast I enjoy
doing,
then I can't do it. So,
I'm just grateful to those of you who
stick around to the bitter end. That's what
I'm saying. So anyway. I am. So I
guess we'll go. Yeah. Okay. Thanks, y'all. Bye.
Bye.