You're listening to the Loving BDSM podcast episode
422.
Kayla Lords here with the one, the only,
the guy who looked like a grumpy polar
bear when somebody pointed out that he was
a grumpy polar bear, and there was an
image of a grumpy polar bear that he
looked like when he got called out for
being a grumpy polar bear.
John Brownstone.
Wow.
It was a very circular thing. That was
that was quite the journey. Yes.
Just admit you're a grumpy polar bear. Yeah.
Okay.
You don't have to, like, prove it by
getting grumpy when somebody calls you a grumpy
polar bear. Just own it. I thought it
was funny. Oh, it was hilarious, except you
did kinda give me that dom look where
you're like, oh, you done fucked up now?
And I was like, wait. This is a
joke. I'm being hilarious and everybody around me,
but you, thinks I'm being hilarious.
Anyhoo. Anyway,
weirdly, that's technically not what we're talking about,
but we are we are gonna our relationship
is gonna be, like, front and center.
We're answering,
vanilla relationship questions that were labeled
provocative.
Oh. So,
yeah, that's what that's that's what we're doing
this week. Welcome to the Loving BDSM podcast.
If this is your first time listening, glad
to have you. You're back for another week.
Welcome back. Loving BDSM is produced every Monday
Friday for your kinky pleasure and education.
And technically threads at that handle I will
forever fucking hate. Loving d s and the
number 1. So it's at loving d s
one.
Technically on blue sky.
Loving BDSM dot all the stuff blue sky
makes you do.
Or on YouTube at youtube.com/loving
BDSM, where you can watch us live stream
the podcast every Wednesday. All links are in
the show notes, and the show notes can
be found at lovingbdsm.net.
Okay. Before we get into the questions,
announcements.
The first one is the kinkery, thekinkery.com,
is having a sale right now. Unfortunately, the
sale does only apply to US orders. I
am so sorry, international folk.
But
now through December 15th at 11:59
PM EST, if you spend $35 or more,
you can get free shipping with a coupon
code, free shipping 24.
I don't expect you to remember that coupon
code. It is literally posted on our site,
and it'll be in all the places for
the this episode.
$35
is not hard to get to because most
of our paddles, I think all of our
paddles, except this slapstick,
start at $35.
So one paddle and you got free shipping.
If you wanted to buy, like, candles or
something, you gotta buy a couple. But if
you're looking for a paddle
and here's the thing, that's savings.
We do flat rate shipping, and we have
to base it on weight because some stuff
is heavy. So the savings of free shipping
is anywhere from 8 to $11
off.
And in some stuff, that's more than 20%
off your the purchase price. So it actually
really is a good deal.
We only do this for this one week,
each year at the holidays. Hopefully, helping folks
out who maybe are buying kinky presents or
or just wanna save some money. That's all
I'm saying.
And you're doing stuff so we can do
restocks on things. We just did a restock
today. Yep.
So, yeah, the kinkery.com,
$35
and up.
Free shipping shipping 24 is the code.
For international folks, we are doing something different.
I can't charge you any less for shipping
than I do because it's all it's really
expensive.
But we are now using UPS, so your
stuff gets to you quicker. Except if you're
in Canada because I didn't check to see
if the strike is still going on or
not. I was talking to my friend in
Canada the other day, and she said the
strike is still ongoing.
I I started using UPS because u USPS,
the post office,
is not even accepting stuff to Canada right
now.
UPS is at least accepting it, but they
were like, it could get stuck in customs.
I was like, okay. I wish somebody would
tell me that before I buy the shipping
label and bring it to the UPS store.
So, yeah, kinkery.com,
free shipping, 24.
$35 or more order, free shipping
there.
2nd announcements,
even though I don't think it's the 3rd
Friday this
this week, because I don't know how numbers
work in calendars, but I'm pretty sure that
we are doing our Friday night livestream. It
is bumped up a week early because of
the holidays later this month.
I didn't check Hanukkah dates. Are we in
Hanukkah right now? Whatever the holidays are, everything's
fucked this month. Okay?
Yeah.
I Oh, jeez. For not having checked what
the Hanukkah dates are. Wow. I'm losing it.
I am so out of touch with with
everything. I thought yesterday was Friday. I know,
I know. I know. I was ready for
the week to be over on a Tuesday.
For anybody who can't tell while we're just
in the announcements at this point,
it's
it's we're.
I I think we're ready for
our break. Our brain is melting.
Anyway, so this Friday, December 13th.
Yes. I believe that is correct. We are
doing our,
December
Friday night livestream,
from,
repeated requests. We will do demos for
dollars situation. So
you don't have to pay to watch the
stream,
or to watch me get hit with something.
But if you want to request what I
get hit with, you do the super chats.
That'll be Friday. We'll explain how it all
works on Friday.
And also,
because I like to multitask,
sure. We'll do a q and a while
I'm being hit with shit. That's happened before.
That has that has happened before.
So,
yeah. That's this Friday. Friday night livestream.
Tada.
I could have sworn there was another announcement,
but I didn't write it down. And so
now I don't remember it.
Oops. My bad.
So
okay.
Okay. And then, oh, thank you, rah rah
in live chat. Hanukkah doesn't start until 25th.
Perfect. Wonderful. Wonderful. I I really usually check
that because when I'm telling when I'm telling
folks from
with the Kinkery Excuse me. When the ideal
shipping dates are, I try to factor in
Hanukkah as well, and I just literally, like
Yeah. I don't know what was going on
this year.
Okay. So we're gonna
its whole purpose of this episode Mhmm. Is
to answer questions because we do not have
the brainpower for anything
super serious. I don't know if you could
tell or not.
I don't know if I made that wrong.
I don't know if I can even answer
these questions.
I saw them earlier.
Stop.
So, we haven't done one of these since
July of this year. I went and checked,
whatever, the archives or whatever.
These are from Therapy Jeff, who I like.
I have linked to the post
on his Instagram where I found these questions.
I'm sure he's on TikTok. I am not
on TikTok.
Instagram reels,
forever.
So,
if you want to,
answer these questions with a partner of your
own, feel free. He called them provocative. And
as as I was listening to him, I
was like, okay. Yeah. Provocative might be the
right word. They're they're, like, a little bit
spicy. Okay?
I don't know what you'll get out of
this other than maybe some entertainment because clearly
we're already feeling goofy and we haven't gotten
into them.
Already feeling goofy and we haven't gotten into
them. Yeah. I was kinda glad I was
looking at these and listening to these early
because I had to start thinking about what
the answers might be. Because some of them
it's about memory and I don't
Yeah. I don't have good memory. Same. Same
thing. I don't Yeah. I don't have good
memory. Same. Same thing. Same. So,
okay.
Okay. Here we go. First question.
Mhmm.
I I think we can fudge because it
does ask in detail and it's okay. And
if for anybody who needs a reminder, I'll
I'll be reading it, but JB's gonna answer
as if I asked him and then I'm
gonna answer as if he asked me. Right.
Right. Okay. There we go. Can you describe
in detail the moment you knew you were
attracted to me?
Was it when you saw my boobs on
the Internet?
Yeah. Yeah. How how did you know? How
did you know? I assumed.
I was like, oh, boobies.
That was before I got brave on putting
other parts there. So yeah. Yeah. No. But,
I I think for me, it was after
we moved to email
for our chats. Okay. You know, we moved
away from
the blog commenting.
Yeah. Yeah. Was it because I made the
first move with email? Did that was like
like a little little pep in your step
there?
A little bit. Yeah. I don't know why
I'm moving my body because podcast listeners provocative.
I'm so glad the podcast listeners can't see
that. I am so sorry to use your
plugs.
So, okay, was was it because our conversations
were maybe more in-depth than they had now?
Because they they were
getting into, you know,
actually getting to know one another. Gotcha.
So I feel bad now for my answer.
Uh-oh. The first time I knew I was
attracted so here's the thing. I knew I
was intrigued. I knew I felt comfortable with
you, which was that was huge. I couldn't
remember the last time I felt comfortable with
somebody
in email. But the time I realized, oh,
oh, oh, I'm
fucked, was when I heard your voice for
the first time
when we had that first phone call where
I was terrified and crying or almost crying
because I was so scared.
Because you have a good voice. You have
a good voice.
You have a good voice. Okay. Thank you.
It's subjective. That's fine. You don't have to
agree with me out there in the world.
Got a good voice. And you I I
don't like listening to the sound of your
voice. You don't. Most people don't. Because it's
not the same in your head as it
is to the right. So
no. It was you were you have one
of those voices
that especially when you're trying to come across
as kinda calm and, like, not frazzled. I
think it's why I get frazzled when you
get frazzled because that didn't feel right. It's
a very, like, calm, soothing, comforting voice, but,
also, I know you're a dom, and that's
kind of how we were relating to another.
So it was like, oh, it was like
being wrapped up in a warm hug. I
was like, oh, okay. Okay.
Yes. We both were attracted to one other
before we ever laid eyes on each
other. That's never been a secret, I think.
No. Okay.
This one
this one threw me, and I it's okay
if it throws you. Is there a scent
or fragrance you associate with our most intimate
moments?
I wouldn't say
intimate. Okay. Intimate moments, but,
it is
a scent that I associate with you,
from the first time meeting you. Okay.
And it's the rosemary peppermint
Shampoo. Shampoo and body wash I used to
use. Yeah. That I use again now. Yep.
But your smelling has gotten worse. I know.
Ability to smell has gotten worse over the
years. I I'd have you'd have to just
be in the shower with me while I'm
washing my hair to smell it. Then I
would probably. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So Yeah. It's
it's yeah. That's I like that. I like
that.
Well, here's what's funny because I couldn't use
that shampoo for a very long time because
my hair was being dyed. Not even the
vivid colors, like, just dyed. And now, no,
too broke for that. So I was like,
let me see if I could go find
the shampoo and conditioner again. I was very
nostalgic. I was like, yeah. My daddy liked
that, so I'll do it again. He can't
smell it now, but it makes me happy.
It's fine. I see the bottles of Michelle
and I smile all day.
So
I have
I have 2 smells that probably make sense
and one that is so inappropriate, but it's
us, so we're gonna go with it. So
I never know what beard balm lotion cream
you're using, but anytime
I smell it or I just sniff your
beard, oh,
it's like being in a warm hug. Like,
you're not even touching me. It does look
a little weird, but sometimes I'm literally nuzzling
his damn beard. Because it smells so good.
Actually, your scent
post shower, you're always like, yeah. That's what
soup will do. I'm like, yeah. But you
smell good. Okay? I'd like to hump your
leg right now.
Whatever.
The other smell, it's rare because it's been
so long,
is leather.
And that comes from a few different things.
When we used to ride your bike together
and you were wearing your leather jacket,
almost every vlogger that I've known and liked
had was kind of that Leather. Right. Right.
Right. Some form of leather. Right. Your your
big leather boots, like, just leather. It makes
me think of kink. It makes me think
of the motorcycle. It makes me think of,
like, all that stuff. Your your play collar
and cuffs? Yep. Yep. Yep. Oh, yeah. I
if I think about leather, I can actually
feel
the the the texture of the bit gag
in my mouth. And there's not actually I'm
not actually sucking on the leather. It's actually
a plastic thing, but still.
The third inappropriate
smell, It's a very personal one. It's not
like I go anywhere and I'd, oh, it
just I it hits me. No. No. No.
This one can only occur
in our bedroom,
and it is
post sex
smell.
I am sure anybody who walked in would
be like, what the fuck is this? Somebody
spray some Febreze.
But I'm like, like, the next day oh,
god. Especially if I hadn't changed sheets yet.
I don't know if you've noticed.
When I bend over this is I know
this is too much for some people. It's
fine. When I bend over at night when
you're like, we're getting ready for bed Mhmm.
Have you noticed?
Like, I'm pushing my face into the sheets.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
It's not that I find it a pleasant
smell, but it is a smell that represents
a good time.
And so, 1, I should change our sheets
more often.
2, maybe that shows how little we've had
sex over the past few years as our
libidos have gone wonky because
I don't have this impetus to immediately change
those sheets.
But, yeah. Yeah. That's why I've been doing
that. Okay. Now everybody's like, we can't make
eye contact with Kayla. We know too much.
It's fine. It's fine. Okay.
Describe a fantasy date,
and let's define that however we would like
to, that would make you want to rip
my clothes off by the end. Now, you
know, I'm I'm
Oh, no. Yeah. Oh, no. Oh, no. It
was right.
You know, it it's been
so long for so many things. I wouldn't
even really call it a date.
I would just be like
a weekend away at a hotel. Well, the
whole point would be for you to rip
my clothes off. Yeah.
Are you saying that if even if we
went and did touristy things,
by the time we got back to our
hotel room, you'd want to rip my clothes
off? Oh, yeah. Okay. You know, and and
and trash a hotel
for old time's sake. I don't are we
getting too old for that?
I mean, we're at a point now, if
I start screaming in pleasure, somebody might think
an old lady's dying. So they might they
might call security or an ambulance. I don't
know which.
Just saying.
I told you I was in rare form
today. Oh, boy. So I don't have
a a situation like date or like whatever.
Mhmm. Here's what makes me want to rip
your clothes off of you. Okay.
Anytime you dress in a way that makes
my brain scream,
oh my god. He's so dominant.
So
and this might actually, this will come into
another,
question because I thought about it both times.
So to give an example,
the times we've gone out on, like, date
dates where we dress up and you wear,
like, your black slacks and either a black
shirt button down shirt or the purple button
down shirt. And then, holy shit, once you
roll up your shirt sleeves and the forearms
are out, I could probably make money
off of your forearms. I'm just saying they're
they're excellent. They're excellent. You have these great,
like, hands that are clearly, like, hardworking hands
and you get it's it's delightful.
I will save the other outfit that is
coming to my mind, but to answer an
upcoming question.
But, yeah, that's that's when whatever we're doing,
by the time we're done, I'm like, it's
it's time to take all that off. And
I would rip that off, but
I need you to wear it again in
the future, so I won't do that.
And why why are my cheeks so hot?
Okay.
This one is weird. Okay. Because this is
not a way I would ever describe myself
or ask a question ever. Thanks, therapy Jeff.
When was the last time
you yearned for my body? Last weekend. Yeah.
That was good.
Okay.
I mean, same.
Same.
You picked up what I was putting down.
Yep. Yep. And
you know what though I ran with it.
Yeah. You did. You know what though? That
was that was less about, like, specifically your
body that was more like the feeling, the
connection, whatever.
I'm gonna sound like a broken record but
when do I yearn for the body? When
I see either.
Sometimes both at the same time. Mhmm. The
forearms.
Mhmm. The thighs. You got great thighs. I
know you're not a soccer player but it's
all those years on the motorcycle.
They're good legs. They're good they're not long
legs. He's a short king and we love
him but they're good legs.
Very good legs.
Just
yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You clench those thighs. I'm
good. I'm good. I'm probably, like, drooling. So
I'm also not much of a yearner. Like,
I don't need to yearn. I just need
to go, hey, daddy. I'm kinda turned on.
Are you turned on? Let's go. Like, I
no. I'm not saying it like that. Y'all
know I'm not saying it like that. But
I like, I don't have to yearn. Mhmm.
I could just be like, hey. Hey. Hey.
Pay attention to me. I'll probably do something
sexy over here. Hey. That's kind of how
last weekend went.
I couldn't say it. Because you're because you're
a baby girl, and you're always gonna be
like, look at me.
Only to you. Yeah. Only to
you. Okay.
Here, we're we're we're coming up to where
there was the whatever.
Which outfit of mine makes you find me
irresistible? Your birthday suit. Glad somebody likes it.
You
like
it better than I do. I'm
just saying. So if I just walk around
naked,
you'd be like, there's not
no time I'm wearing something and you're like,
oh. No. No. Not particular. No. Well, I
mean, I do dress like Adam Sandler on,
who's coming down from a a bender or
something.
I'm in my Adam Sandler era. Okay. I
don't love it, but here I am. Okay.
So I already talked about the slacks and
button down shirt and the roll. Okay. And
that, yes.
But also,
you don't I know why you haven't worn
it in a long time. I know you're
working towards being able to wear it. It
is oh my god. I'm drooling thinking about
it. It's your black kilt
with a black t shirt Mhmm. And your
black boots and nothing under the kilt.
What do they wear under their kilt?
JB wears nothing most of the time. Unless
they're going out in public, you will you
will wear something in there.
God, that is such a, like, a luscious,
luscious, you know, guilt. To see where I'm
at with that. And you should. And even
if you gotta suck it in a little
bit or just not snap it or what
however
it just oh my god. I'd yeah.
Yeah. I'd lift your skirt up in a
heartbeat.
I should be embarrassed that I'm not, y'all.
I'm not. Look. You can't put your tits
on the Internet and then be embarrassed about
anything else after that. Come on. True. True.
True. But, yeah, you are so dead sexy
in that. Holy shit. Holy shit. Whoo. Is
it hot in here? I shouldn't have worn
a long sleeve shirt. It is. Oh god.
I'm afraid.
What's the most attractive thing about my personality?
Wow. You know,
I I read that question when you sent
me these earlier.
Uh-huh.
And you know what immediately came to my
mind?
Your sassiness.
Yay.
That's Southern robbery.
Yay.
Yeah.
Well, if
you if you did not laugh with me
more often than you guys, like, a little
annoyed with me, then, yeah, it would it
would not be as fun. No. So I
mean and I also
I I don't think I could suppress it
if you didn't like it. We wouldn't work
if you didn't like it. Yeah. So it
does help that you like it. Most most
most of the time. Yeah. More times than
not. 95% of the time. Yeah. Alright. Alright.
Okay. So for me Mhmm. I don't wanna
pick one because there's lots. So there's okay.
There's your dom look and then there's you
putting on your dom look, and they're 2
different looks. When it comes to you naturally
and you weren't thinking about it, oh oh
my god.
I am both terrified and ready to roll
over and do whatever you need me to
do in whatever take that however you'd like.
You're like you're like Lola rolling over on
the back Right. Waiting for belly rubs. Or
sticking my ass in the air. Whatever. Whatever.
But then there is the part of your
personality that's that
calm,
confident, quiet part, like, especially when you take
charge, like, when I'm in freak out mode
and you're like, baby girl. And you're like,
no. It's been a hot minute because we've
been in freak out mode together Right. Which
is truly not my favorite place for us
to be. Only one of us should be
falling apart at a time. Okay?
And it should be the baby girl, I
think. I just think it should be.
But, yeah, when you there's a thing going
on or you are looking at me going,
oh, she's more of a hot mess than
usual. I need to take care of this.
That there's a part of the a way
you get it's the daddy side of you.
It's not the bratty daddy or the sadist
daddy. It's like the
but then you're you're still the dumb because
you're like sometimes you'd be like, listen. You
know? Like,
breaking through whatever the chaotic noise is in
my head. And, yeah, I like I like
that part. But I also like that you
listen really well and that you like this
should not the bar is in hell, okay,
for
hetero passing relationships.
I like that you've never once said, if
you'll make me a list, I'll I'll help
you tell me how to help you around
the house I also paid for. Right? Like,
you just, like, see shit, and you just
fucking get it done because you're a grown
ass man
who, right, like, has lived a life and,
you know, doesn't need anybody to quote take
care of him. I take care of you
because I choose to, not because you need
it because you're not my 3rd child.
I married my 3rd child, apparently, is what
I did the first time.
And I do like that about you. I've
we've never once had to sit down and
go,
I've had to ask you for more help,
but because I'm bad at asking for help
Mhmm. And or at times you weren't sure
of your role in a situation because it
was outside of our power exchange. Right. And
that I was, like, having a nervous breakdown,
and we just had to sort some stuff.
But in general,
you just,
you know Yeah. I do see it. I
like that about him. Okay. But it does
prove the bar is in hell because that
shouldn't be a thing that anybody has to
be praised for. Thank you for participating in
your own relationship.
Like, that that should not be praiseworthy, but
I do appreciate it. Because I'm one of
those people who knows what it's like to
not have it.
So
okay. Oh, I've already answered this, but we'll
answer it again. Okay. Is there a look
or gesture your eye make that really turned
you on? And then you wiggle your butt.
Yeah. That's what it was part of what
I did. So
now I'm learning since my favorite outfit is
my birth that your favorite outfit of mine
is my birthday suit. So when I do
it when I'm in my birthday suit, is
that, like, double the Double yeah. Double shot.
Okay. Okay.
I mean, I I do I wiggle my
butt. I wiggle my butt for many reasons.
But one of the butt things reasons I
wiggle my butt is to make it a
butt more obvious target than it already is.
If I'm if I wiggle it, you're like
it's like, hey. Pay attention to me if
my butt could talk. Right. And that's backfired
on you a few times, hasn't it? Goddamn.
Yeah. I know. Yeah. Yeah. I know. Because
that's the sadist daddy.
Also, maybe the bratty daddy. The bratty sadist?
I don't know.
The look or gesture,
you're actually kinda doing it a little bit.
It's not your dom look. You look really
relaxed but there's that leaning on your forearm
like that. But when and then pair it
with with the dom look that you're not
trying. The one that just like you had
that moment and it just
was there. Because there there really is a
difference. Usually,
I've I've caught you unawares, and you you
just naturally go into it.
Sometimes And I'm like,
baby girl, again?
Sometimes it's his what the fuck Dom look.
Okay? And sometimes
it's that's my baby girl Dom look. Sometimes
it's you are walking a thin line.
I like them all. I like them all
is what I'm saying.
Okay.
Now we're gonna get into a part where
I'm I don't I'm not good with the
talking Mhmm. When we're talking about, like, provocative
stuff. But
you are. He's a a talker, y'all. Get
him naked, and he's got stuff to say.
Anyway,
what have I said or could I say
that would really turn you on?
It's the only time I'm not talking y'all
is when I'm when it's, like, sexual, so
I don't Yeah. I mean
Like, if you want me to shut up,
apparently turn me on.
But so is there something I could say?
Like, I don't maybe, but if I did,
you'd be like, hot damn. Let's go.
I think if you gave me that,
you know,
why you give me that little koi side
eye.
I do it all the time.
I'm pretty much always giving you some form
of side eye. Well, there's different
flavors of side eye. There it's true. Just
like there's different flavors of dame lai. I
did preface that with koi side eye. And
I I could never purposely repeat that. I
it's got a I don't even know what
that one looks like. Right. Yeah. Not a
clue. It just kinda slips in there sometimes.
So
what the things you said there you say
plenty that turn me on. Like, anytime you
call me baby girl in your deep gravelly
voice. Like, I'm I'm like, fuck. What what
do I need to roll over? What do
you need? What do you need?
Anytime you you call me something, but it's
my my whatever, I'm like, I've just melted.
And if I wore panties, they'd be wet.
But, yeah, that's that's
yeah. It's more tone of voice than what
you say, but when you say baby girl
in that that voice, not the annoyed voice,
not the at his wits end voice, not
the
you think I've gone too far in sassiness.
No. No. No. No. No. No. Not the
I said none of those.
None of those. None of those. Don't like
those. Nope. Don't like those. I'm am I
gonna change my behavior to prevent them? No.
But I don't like them.
Okay.
This one kinda goes with that. Okay. What
words do you wish I'd whisper in your
ear more often?
Fuck me, daddy.
Let's go get cheese.
Goddamn it. I was gonna be all sexy
and you're like, I would like cheese, please.
Look. You don't have to threaten me with
a good time. I'm down to go get
more cheese
any day. Any day.
We literally buy more than £2 from Sam's
Club every month. You know, either they're they're
interchangeable.
It's more cheese. Jesus.
Not fuck me daddy? Not I'm yours daddy?
Come on now.
Goddamn it.
You're very pleased with your
self. This one's hard for me because
you are a talker. It's the only time
you're a talker. You're a talker. So I
like, what am I gonna what do I
wanna hear more often? You I don't know.
You've you've got a whole, like,
what's the word I want? Like, a a
not a script, but, like, you've got, like,
a whole cast of things that you'll just
pull out and they're all, like,
okay. But
Repoitwon?
Yes. That's the word. I would never have
said it like that. But yes.
It's right up there with how you you
pronounce extravaganza.
No. No. We're answering these questions.
We scared off any newcomers,
and we've annoyed the people who come for
the the topics they enjoy and don't come
for this. So
fine. It's fine.
I it goes back to,
I do like when you're, like, bend over,
like, bend over the bed.
Let me see that ass. I like that
one. Because it's usually something's gonna happen to
that ass. It's probably gonna get smacked. I'm
fucking here for it.
It's not a thing you whisper and it's
not a thing you say often, but you
have said it before. But basically,
when
I'm walking that fine line Mhmm.
But it's not like a corner time situation.
It's a I'm, I'm gonna learn how much
spankings can suck kind of a lot. And
you don't you say different things. It's usually
baby girl and that tone.
But it's the one where I kinda catch
the vibe of,
I'm not gonna like this, but also I
am going to to like this.
That one, I like that one too. Mhmm.
I like that one too. Okay. Okay.
It's okay if you can't answer this because
that's a long time ago. Okay? How did
you feel during our first kiss?
That was that was a while ago. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Because it was the first time we
physically met in person. Mhmm. And, I think
you spanked me before you kissed me. I
did. Which is how our relationship goes. We
don't we don't kiss a lot. I mean,
I kiss your cheek. You kiss my cheek,
but we're we're not making out. No. Because
mostly, I I would like you to be
focused on my ass more than anything. True
true true. But I mean, in the beginning,
we did kiss a lot. Yeah. We did.
You know, I
I think what I think what I
felt
during that first kiss was that,
yeah, I like this.
I mean, I is there any other response
that's appropriate?
So
I have the same thoughts whenever I kiss.
Mhmm. Like like like kiss, not a peck.
Like, you know, we're slobbering over one another
that I always have because I have issues
and should go back to therapy and it's
am I doing this right? Is this okay?
Do I remember how to do this?
Because by the time I was kissing you,
I hadn't kissed anybody in a while and
I've never been confident on my kissing abilities.
Mhmm. My when I'm kissing though, is the
one time I'm willing to, like,
play with not power, but, like, control a
little bit.
I don't I I
I know where that comes from, though. It
has nothing to do with you. I'll I
maybe I'll explain in a minute. But
it's that's mostly what I'm thinking. So that's
not the sexy thought.
I do kind of remember thinking
as sort of what I was thinking when
you spanked me the first time too,
finally.
Finally.
No. Okay. So I've done this this
dominance thing with kissing
since I started kissing, which when was that?
God. My first kiss was when I was
13,
I think. Oh, and he was an older
boy and that was a good kiss. And
no. My first kiss was before him and
that dude, it was very wet And I
was like, is this kissing? I don't
but then the next dude,
he's older and he was good. And yes,
I was still 13 at the time. That's
that's neither here nor there. Anyway,
I think I always do this, like, play
for dominance thing
with kissing.
And I think what I've always been waiting
for is the person who takes that control
back. Like, I'm like, oh, I'll I'll do
my tongue and my mouth, my lips the
way I want. What are you doing
about it? And quite frankly, nobody did nothing
about it until
I realized I was kinky and started dating
Doms only.
So, yeah,
that is more than anybody's ever wanted to
know about me, and it's okay. It's okay.
I have very little shame.
That went super super fast. Mhmm.
I feel like we there's should we talk
do you want me to find more questions?
Do you want to talk about anything else?
That was really fast. This does not feel
like an episode. No. This is like half
an episode. Yeah. I mean, I have things
I've been thinking about Okay. But I haven't
thought through my thoughts completely. Yes. That's a
thing you have to do sometimes.
Or at least I do.
But do you have anything on
your mind?
I've got lots of things on my mind,
but, you know kink oriented Yeah. Power exchange
oriented.
I don't know. I I just feel like
in in in recent
times that we've kind of been taking our
dynamic back a little bit more? Oh, absolutely.
Absolutely.
So this what I've been thinking goes along
with that a little bit because I have
felt myself
being a little bit more
my baby girl self Mhmm. Which
it's she's got to be able to relax.
Okay? Or Mhmm. To know it's safe to
whine. I don't know.
So
I know I'm a person who has said
for many years, and I still believe this,
that books should not fiction books should not
be treated as how to manuals. And you
shouldn't like, you could be inspired, but you
shouldn't, like, emulate shit you're reading to the
letter because it's fantasy and fiction and whatever
whatever.
But I've been reading a series that has
had me in a fucking choke
hold. And literally every time I'm like,
oh, I can't I mean, I know what's
gonna happen in all these because they're you
know, there's a formula to them, and that's
fine. Oh, maybe I should go read something
else to get, like, a palate cleanser. I'll
come back in a few weeks and finish.
Nope. Nope. I keep going. I keep going
because the characters are well written.
But it's kind of inspired me.
So the book series I'm reading is called
MC Daddies by Leila Roberts.
She apparently has written a shit ton of
other books. Will I be reading those? Probably.
In MC Daddies, that's a motorcycle club and
the people who are kind of,
related to that motorcycle club in different ways
or to the peep you know, kind of
connected to the people.
And they are all daddy dom so far,
and then their partners that they find are
littles.
And sometimes they know they're littles, and sometimes
they don't.
And it there's a there's a little formulaic.
It's got some age play, so that's not
really my jam.
But it was kind I was nervous about
it. I was like, oh my god. I
don't I don't wanna read something. And then
because that's so not my thing,
get out of the head space, like, you
know, of enjoying the book. Like, I don't
know.
Even though it's it's definitely not my thing,
the way it's written, it makes so much
sense with the characters and the story that
it's like,
I don't have to I I'm not a
person who thinks I have to find
people I'm reading about in books relatable. They
don't I don't have they just have to
be well written enough that I'm like, oh,
I am I actually give a fuck what
happens to you.
I don't have to relate to them. I
just gotta care.
And so the series is good. I'm on
book 9, which is where we finally get
to a non straight, nonmonogamous
situation.
It's been delightful so far.
But
even though most of the the littles
in this series that I've read
go, you know, behave in ways I would
never. It's just not who I am.
Being in their head and reading their stories,
which are fiction, I can't imagine a motorcycle
club would have this many fucking daddy doms
unless they advertised.
They were only looking for daddy doms. Like
but
it's made
me feel a little bit more in touch
with and want to be more in touch
with my baby girl side.
And I'm sorry for you that that so
far has looked like whining
in the middle of the night.
It has not looked like, you know,
being sweet and, you know, whatever. Playful and
what a no. No. No. It's been whining.
It's been whining. But you know what? What
I've what I have figured out about myself
as a baby girl, which to me is
on the spectrum of littles. I don't have
an age in my head. I don't do
age play. I don't like, I don't I
don't do any of that. That's that that
part's not me.
But it is my
almost younger seeming side. It's certainly the the
one who wants fewer responsibilities.
We have Onyx up here. Hope she doesn't,
like, rub on the mics too
much, or show her butthole to the camera
too late.
But,
it you know, I I don't I don't
want what they have,
but I want the feeling I get when
I'm reading them.
And sex scenes and not sex scenes,
like, these
these,
daddy dom,
so far they've all been men,
are written in from my imagination,
like, the exact kind of, I'm gonna protect
you whether you like it or not.
You are a danger to yourself. And so
clearly, you you need me.
And I I'm just like, yes. I am
a danger to myself, not in the way
these chicks have been because I'm not trying
to get, like nobody's trying to kill me
or kidnap me, but I don't always make
responsible decisions for myself.
And, yeah, I probably do need help with
that. Mhmm. And so to your point, Leila
Roberts, for anybody who's like, what series? Leila
Roberts. It's called MC Daddies. It's one of
many series she has. I have a feeling
I'll be reading all of them. She writes
good characters.
Re like, really good h.
Some of the daddy domes have some similarities,
but there's clear personality differences. And then The
Littles,
again, there's some formula there that I'm like,
but
the the personality of the woman,
not when they're in their little space or
whatever whatever. Mhmm. The woman, completely different. And
I've, like I've really enjoyed that.
The 9th book right now is my favorite.
It could be because the assassin who's, like,
got everybody fucked up and confused
has figured out he's a daddy dumb, and
so we're learning that actually he's not just
a cold hearted psychopath or sociopath.
He wants to be a good daddy,
and he's got 2 partners.
And that oh, that's been delightful to read.
Anyway anyway anyway.
But yeah. So,
yes, our power exchange has absolutely taken a
backseat to fucking everything lately.
But
being
a little bit more in touch with my
baby girl side makes me want to
you know, maybe it's not the
the control and the tasks and the rituals,
but the connection of when you use your
daddy voice and I'm all baby girl and
when we connect like that.
Mhmm.
Yes. That's that's why I've been webbed.
And
I apologize now.
So I'm probably setting myself up when I
ask this. Could you tell a difference?
Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah. What do you think
of the difference? I I like it. I
mean, you haven't heard me complain, have you?
Well, no. But you're usually so distracted. Unless
I, like, really fuck up, you really haven't
been complaining much.
That's what happens when the the power exchange
gets pushed back a little bit. Yeah. 1,
you let slip shit slide that I'm not
purposely trying to to do anything. Mhmm. But
there's times in retrospect, I'm like,
why don't he say something? Like, what the
hell? Even I know. I that was that
was out of pocket. I
but, also, what I've
noticed
Okay. So
in our power exchange, in our relationship, in
our sex life, you are the initiator.
I am the
please initiate with me. I don't know what
the word is I want.
Co instigator.
No.
I usually am waiting
for you
to initiate. And then a week or so
ago, a couple of weeks ago, whenever that
was, I, in my own way, initiated sex.
Yes. That was some good sex.
I feel like the past several days when
I've been more in my baby girl headspace,
I've initiated
that.
And I think what I'm kind of and
you've responded and you always respond.
What's different, and I can tell everything's kind
of wonky,
is that you are not initiating,
either in a power exchange baby girl daddy
drum kinda way or sex way. You're picking
up on my signals.
Thank god I'm very clear communicator.
Subtly is not my forte.
But, yeah, you have not every once in
a while, like, every once in a while,
I think, like, 2 butt rubs out of
10. I was like, there he is. There.
But that's a 20% success rate. I we
should at least be at a 50% success
rate.
I mean, look. I'm grateful anytime you touch
my ass. My my butt is this I'm
glad he's a butt guy. I'm glad I'm
a a butt no.
I'm glad I don't mind having my butt.
That's the no.
That's getting worse.
Anyway, I'm glad he's a butt guy.
But
let's not make that a drinking game. How
many times did I say but?
There is there's a vibe. And there have
been a couple of nights where it was
like,
this is good. This feels like the old
times. And then and I I know you're
tired and there's stress and there's stuff going
on. Wait till the bonus section when we
tell you about Lola. Oh my god.
But
however,
I don't I don't know.
You know, there was a time if my
baby girl voice came out,
get out of the trash can, you little
shit. That was Onyx Mhmm. Wanting to lick
plastic.
There was a time if my baby girl
voice even cropped up, oh, full on daddy
dom. Full on. Like, the energy was just
shift.
It was delight well, it was usually delightful
unless
I was walking that. Wasn't. Right? Unless I
was walking that fine line. Mhmm.
But I have not
noticed
that.
And I know you're all up in your
head. I I can tell before you can
tell when you're all up in your head.
Can.
So I'm it's not like a, oh, let
me put in a complaint to the complaints
department. It's more like a it is strange
to
be in the space and to see you
not
pick it up like you used to.
We're not feeding off of one another the
way we used to. I I I have
fallen into
this
headspace
recently of,
you know, to say, keep my nose to
the grindstone and just trying to get through
the holiday season. I know. I know. And
but here's the thing though. Mhmm. And this
has always been true, and it's not like
I'm, like, oh, having a revelation.
There will always be something we gotta get
through. True. Like,
I mean, it sucks. I am really tired
of always having something we gotta get through.
Yeah. So,
you know, I can't believe that I'm the
fucking one saying this because this is so
against type. Somebody should, like, take me to
a doctor and have me check. But
wouldn't it's better it's it's
getting it in small doses,
it's not as good as, you know, full
octane all the the way we used to
be. Sure. Sure. Sure. But it's
better than nothing.
And since we will always have shit to
go through Yeah. You know, I think we
lived a charmed life prior to 2021.
I don't
I don't know. Yeah. I don't know how
or what. I don't know. But, yeah, clearly,
we were living a charmed eye. And the
universe went,
yeah. You're I'm getting my beer. You're getting
too big for your britches over there.
And now I think here's what I think.
I know we did, and I think you're
still doing.
Sometimes I am too. We're waiting for things
to go back to the way they used
to be.
I don't think that's not gonna happen. Happen.
That's not gonna happen. No. And I don't
mean, like, for anybody out there. It's not
about our dynamic the way we used to
be. I think we could get back there
if that's what fits
us. But this whole
waiting for it to be better, waiting to
have time, waiting to not be so tired.
You know? And
I know that I can say that today
while I'm feeling I'm feeling weird today, but,
like, I'm feeling good in this conversation. And
it's easy to say right now. And believe
me, I am an impatient baby girl. In
5 minutes or 5 months, I'll be the
one going, it's not enough. It's not fair.
I want
more and or thinking
I don't have time for this. I don't
have time for this. I don't like, it
so I'll be the voice of reason today
so he can be the voice of reason
tomorrow.
You know, we kinda have to make time
for it, and we have to, like,
get okay with getting little bits
because that's what we have the energy and
time and whatever for. Mhmm. Because that is
what that is what will keep us connected
until we get to some mythical time in
the future when, air quote, things calm down.
Right. Yeah.
I mean, how many years do you have
to go where things aren't calm to finally
just go, no. They're never calming down. Mhmm.
This is the timeline we live in. I
I look at the news from time to
time. I know things are never calming down.
So,
you know, that's kind of where let me
tell you.
Look. I think I might now be Alela
Roberts stan because
she's making me feel shit when I'm reading
a kink I'm not even fucking into.
I don't want any of that, but it
makes sense for their characters. It makes sense
for the moment. I'm glad I just go
with it.
But a few of them, so far, I'm
only in book 9. There are 12, y'all.
Full length. And I think there's novellas. I
don't think I'll read those. But,
a few times,
she's had,
in the story, the littles gotten spanked purposely
until they cry. Like, the whole point was
to get that fucking emotion out. And I
cannot tell you in the past
48 hours
how many times I've almost come to you
and gone,
I need some of that. And here's the
thing, I do need that.
I'm terrified because it I don't, I don't
cry easily. It kind of in general.
It's my own issue. I should go to
therapy.
It's an it's not an issue to not
cry. It's the tight lock I have on
my emotions.
And also I'm a little afraid of what
my sadist daddy might have to do, how,
how much it might have to hurt. I'm
afraid it gets to the point where I
have a chance of crying and
I am
a little baby who can't handle this.
But, yeah, I was like, oh god. Yeah.
Wow. To just, like,
let it like, to get the catharsis.
You know? Mhmm. We have finally so thankfully,
the youngest is at the and he has
been for a while. We just didn't take
advantage of it. He is at that teenager
point in life where headphones or earbuds are
always on. Yeah. There's about 3 or 4
things coming at him from a screen,
whether it's his Xbox, it's his his
Chromebook, or it's his phone, at any given
moment, there's a certain point of the night.
We close the door. He does not know
we exist. He's not not only can he
not hear us because across the house, blah
blah blah. He
we we ceased to exist. He doesn't even
know we're there.
We could do more things as long as
I'm not screaming the house down.
And it's only been in the last
few weeks
that you've even gotten comfortable with it. So
I know part of that is a comfort
thing of Yeah. How much can be heard.
And, you know, if I come to you
and go, look. I'm and Yeah. How much
can be heard. And, you
know, if I come to you and go,
look, I'm gonna need June to spank me
until until something. I don't know. I don't
I I know that you can't
like, I can never guarantee that he'll spank
me away and I'm definitely gonna cry.
I used to be able to, and then
that stopped being a thing. Yeah. And so
I I don't know anymore. But it's like,
I'm I don't I don't know. Until I
say for it, until your arm gets tired?
I don't know.
If I cry, that's that's the signal. Stop
right there. But, like, I can't I don't
even know what I'm asking for, but I
feel like
we are at a point now and probably
have been at that point for several months
where we can do more than we have
done. Mhmm.
So Yep. Mhmm. Mhmm.
And it's been nice. It has been nice.
I just think that that whole our power
changes have been pushed back and both and
we're not
we're not we're waiting for that mythical time
when there's not a lot going on. Mhmm.
The I say all of that to just
go, okay. But that now it's an excuse.
We Yeah. We can do more. And, sure,
energy and where your head space is at,
all of that is important and has to
factor into it. But I also wonder how
much better might our head space be if
we pushed through some of that, not all
of it. Like, you gotta watch yourself push
through some of that. Maybe I'm not I
don't have the energy
to get to a place we know we
like to be at.
Maybe we need to explore that.
Just saying. I'm just saying.
Because I think even though we're not actively
doing anything new or
whatever
with the
dynamic part of things, I think that's not
where we need to focus our attention
because my my tasks are down. Yeah. You
know, we
the the bend over the bed, get your
nighttime spanking slash butt rub, that's been really
good. Mhmm.
If I got a little touchier feelier, and
I'm very grateful for that. It's like I'm
wiggling the fate, my fave your favorite part
of my body. Like, come on, man.
But so, like, all of that kind of
stuff, I think we're
as solid as we can get right now
with the life we have right now. Yeah.
Now it's the other it's the daddy and
baby girl. It's the play part
within our comfort level knowing we've got, you
know, somebody in the house all the time.
Like like that part. Part. You know?
I think if we could find ways to
reconnect there, I think you'd feel a little
bit better. I know someone would. I know
I would.
Just saying. Very possible.
He hates saying you might be right or
you are right.
Good lord. What was it last night? I
I I can't remember what we're talking about
anymore. I was like, you know I'm right.
And then he, like, waited a beat so
that he could prove me wrong
because
you just didn't want me to be right.
I think he was, like, searching up in
the,
like, depths of his memory to be able
to prove. Because I said, oh, you've already
forgotten. You don't even know what you said,
so you can't repeat it to me. But
and then, I mean, it was a pause.
It was like a 30 second pause. I
think he was going
through the filing cabinet. It is his brain
to find the thing that I accused him
of not remembering
just to prove me wrong. Because
it's not that hard to say, baby girl,
you're usually right. And
you also could be correct.
Yeah. I I did I take the line
and do, like, jump rope? Am I playing
double touch on the line between sass and
a step beyond sass?
See what happens when we answer provocative
questions?
Oh my god. The leaves just flew sideways
outside the window. I guess It's like the
weather's vicious wind out there right now. Picking
up. Mhmm. So anyway, if anybody would like
some actual good daddy dom little
fiction, highly recommend the MC Daddies, Leila Roberts.
I know Rah Rah really, really likes I
could see it. Rah Rah on the live
chat. Actually, I think what I can't remember
where I saw
the first book I read.
I think it might it might have just
kinda come up in a search I was
doing in Kindle Unlimited, and I scrolled. And
I I like to read reviews every once
in a while if it's a especially if
it's kink stuff because I need somebody
to to sometimes,
it doesn't always happen, but sometimes there'll be
somebody who's like, that's not how any of
this works. That's what I need to see.
And I scrolled, and I think it was
under reviews.
And Raw Rush's name came up, and I
went, oh, well, I fucking trust her. Okay.
It had the Raw Rush seal of approval.
It's like, I'll try the first one. Then
it would, you know, be personal preference if
I finished it or kept going. But
MC Daddy's, Layla Roberts.
Layla like Kayla but with an h on
the end? L a y l a h.
I think I'm spelling that right. Very good.
Very prolific writer.
A lot of it seems to be daddy
Tom's and, you know,
I'm here for that. You know.
And I'm reading Married to a Alien Cowboy.
Which is a book I got because I
was on my my future. I'm gonna read
this at some point,
and and thankfully, you're reading it and can
vouch that, no. No. You picked a good
one. This is a good book. I mean,
it it it has a little bit of
trope to it, but I think it makes
up for it with the, humor.
You know what? I don't mind tropes. They're
when they're done well
and
most tropes. Mhmm. The one that will have
me frothing at the mouth and wanting to
throw the book slash my phone across the
room is the miscommunication
trope. I think maybe 2 times I've read
it done well where
from the outside looking in, you would go,
of course, they wouldn't talk about that like
they should because they there's a trust there,
and that's a vulnerable conversation.
But when it's the
literally this could be cleared up with one
conversation
and y'all were dating and slash fucking for
6 months and you can't have this conversation.
No. I'm ready to throw something across the
room. But other than that, most tropes I
don't mind as long as they're executed fairly
well. You know, the tropes make things, for
me, kinda predictable.
When I when I recognize when I'm reading,
I'm like, I know how this goes. Every
once in a while, a really recognize when
I'm reading, I'm like, I know how this
goes. Every once in a while, a really
good writer will, like, turn it on its
head and I'm like, oh, that was surprising.
So
but Yeah.
So, yeah, that we went from questions to
the state of our power exchange. Right. I
thought that was gonna be next week's topic.
I I don't know what it'll be now.
It'd be a big bonus section. It might
be. Look. We did the questions.
We've done the Reddit stuff.
We've,
next week, whatever. We we are not functioning
at full
mental capacity, so
I'm I'm here for a good time, not
a long time. I don't know. I just
like, sometimes it's more important that you just
show up because that's what you do than
to, like, have something, you know,
profound
to say. Yeah.
These end of year
episodes
kinda tend to be for, like,
the folks who are gonna stay till the
end of a bonus section. Yeah. Because y'all
know at this point in the year, we
are
running on fumes and,
you know,
maybe some laughing gas, who the fuck knows,
because we get weird. We get weird.
So yeah.
So I think that's gonna be the end
of the episode.
I couldn't just have, like, a 25 minute
episode. That's the Monday episodes.
And we got to talk about a thing
that's been on my mind. So Oh, good.
And maybe we recommended an author to somebody.
I don't know.
We can do a bonus section because I
know you need to talk about Lola. Oh,
yeah. Oh, yeah. You you went through it
yesterday. She she went through it more than
anybody, but JB was, like, right on her
heels going through it. So Are we good?
That's not really for me to say. Keep
it kinky, y'all. And we'll see you next
week.
Dottie.
Yes, baby girl. Can we talk to the
crickets? We can. As if we haven't already
been doing that.
Tell them about Lola. Okay. First of all,
let me preface this.
There's gonna be a few moments of kind
of gross,
conversation about eyes. If that if clearly no
pictures. No. But if you or Squiggy out
about the like, fast forward or put us
on mute or whatever for, like, probably 2
minutes.
Start there so people have
She had an eye issue. Yeah.
So yeah. I had gotten out of the
shower,
and and
baby girl comes in the bedroom, and she's
like, you need to see your dog. Because
I almost couldn't look at her after what
I was seeing. I'm like, what? And she's
like, you you just need to see your
dog. Her eyeball was not facing the right
way, y'all. No. Her,
when I when I came out
to look at her, her eyeball had rolled.
It was actually coming back around because when
she showed it to me,
I literally only saw white and then, like
Mhmm. Red blood cell you know, like Yeah.
At by the time you looked shot. Yeah.
But it was white. Back around appropriately.
Mhmm. But that when he when he confirmed
I was not crazy,
I was like, I'm gonna call the vet.
And he goes, please do. Please do. And
I'm usually the look. I'm gonna tell my
kids to rub some dirt on it and
walk it out. Okay?
So I'm not the first one to call
a doctor. Let's get an appointment.
Especially when it's your pet, you know it's
a $500 visit. But eyeballs
are not supposed to do that. And No.
And it was one of those things we
do not know
when it happened. And what I mean by
that is she was perfectly fine. We've been
looking at her multiple times in the day.
Nothing wrong with her eye. She was laying
peacefully on her bed. I'm sitting at my
desk.
She walks up to me, which is not
unusual
because she'll lay, like, in between our chairs
or whatever over here at the the at
our desks. Yeah. But as she walks up
to me, she starts rubbing, like, trying to
get her paw up on her face, like,
when they're now, you know, is itchy or
something. She's rubbing
her side of her head with the the
left eye that was the issue, like, on
the carpet. And I'm like, oh, there's something
itching. And then she looked up at me,
and it I every time I think about
it, I can see it and mm-mm. Um-mm.
So I I was like, no. No. That
that's an issue we have to we have
to sort out. We do. Mhmm. She has
had known eye issues. So Right. I would
have taken her regardless of the cost. Eyeballs
aren't supposed to do that.
But what was we thought was gonna be
a 2 or $300 visit was only 70
because the vet's like, yeah. This is her
eye seems to be mostly okay, but here's
these drops and blah blah blah. Mhmm. And
her eye is going to have issues
until we have a surgery
procedure. We schedule that for her to fix
her eye eyelids, eyelashes.
Her she she has
what they what the vet called entropia.
Entropian? Entropia? I don't know how they pronounce
it. Yeah.
Can't remember. And, basically, what has happened
and it's happened to both her eyes, but
one The left eye is the worst. Left
eye is worse than the other. Her eyelids
have curled inwards. And so her eyelashes are
constantly Are constantly
irritating her eyes.
Yeah.
Apparently, this is something that's common
in in some of these some of the
this this breed,
her breed.
But, yeah, they they can
do a surgery to correct it. Otherwise, this
is just gonna apparently keep going on. Right.
And,
you know,
money wise, it's not it's not about that.
It's more her comfort is caught. And it
was and it was out. And anybody who's
ever had to take
anybody,
young or vulnerable, child or pet, to a
doctor knows
Something fucked up was going on. We called.
We get the appointment. They were like, can
you get here in 15 minutes? We're like,
actually, yes. We can. We'll be there. They're
like, we'll fit you in with the lap
you know, in between the last appointments of
the day. Fine. Thank you. We appreciate that.
Before we even walked out the door, her
eye was looking normal again, and I went,
I don't care. Right. That did a thing
it wasn't supposed to do. Mhmm. We're gonna
go get it looked at. And Yeah.
So it it was swollen, and she does
have the doctor called it an ulcer, but,
like, she has a sore that she did
not have before literally in her eyeball.
Yeah.
So she's on antibiotics.
She is very confused as to why Onyx
is sitting
6 inches away from her. Oh, wow. Yeah.
I wish I could show y'all this.
She is staring very intently at Onyx, who
is just cleaning herself like she has 0
fucks to give.
Anyway,
so,
we take her to the vet. She hates
going to the vet.
She they we have she wears a harness,
and it has one of those handle things
on top so she can be moved if
she needs to be.
And JB was basically picking up her 77
pound fucking ass and Mhmm. Kind of
scooting slash carrying her
in. Took 5 tries to get her on
the scale. And I'm like, you know, same
girl. I don't like being weighed either. You
know?
Onyx does not know that her life is
in potential danger. Well, actually, they were staring
at each other just a few seconds ago.
Oh oh, Lola's
Lola's making noise. Lola doesn't like it.
And then she made a whiny noise, y'all.
Onyx took the hint.
Onyx got so deep in cleaning herself
that she was not paying attention to Lola,
who was starting to do a little lip
curl.
Like, I don't like this. You're you're in
my bed and you're way too close.
And now,
maybe as a stress response, Onyx is licking
plastic. So
so now we get her to the vet,
and they had said it'll probably be awake
because we are fitting in. And we're like,
that's fine. We're just glad to be here.
So,
normally,
when Lola goes to the vet, she doesn't
like it. She paces for a while, and
then she plops down on the the floor,
and she just becomes a lump. She plops
a baked potato. It's fine.
She paced. She would come up to me,
look at me, knows me, walk back to
the door, look at me. She then she'd
from there, she'd walk up to JB, knows
him, walk back to the door, back and
forth and back and forth. And at one
point
so it's a bench and there's the door
to our left. JB is sitting closest
to the door. I'm in the corner. Mhmm.
Lola has come up to me, butted me
with her nose.
It's she acts it's like she wants pets,
but no. She's, like, trying to tell you
it's time to go, and here's the door.
So she's done that to me. She walks
back to the door,
and instead of coming around, because she had
been going around this bench thing we're sitting
on, she sit stands at the side of
the bench on the other side of JB
and doesn't look at him.
Lola.
What are we doing, ma'am?
Oh my god. She was standing up and
snarly
at onyx.
She really don't feel good, y'all.
Do you need to go in the other
room? She might. She's not usually like this.
No. Anyway,
she turns her head from standing at the
door,
pops her head up, like, extends her neck.
Her ears go up and the only expression
I can describe
on her face is,
do you not see me at this door,
bitch? I said, let's go.
I just went,
I can't take you seriously, Lola, when you're
you're literally looking at me like, what the
fuck?
Is it that Onyx is too close to
her bed? I think so. I need Onyx
to stop licking that plastic. I know.
They've lost their minds in here today is
what's happening. Mhmm. Mhmm. So JB is on
eye drop and warm compress duty. Yeah. Every
2 hours,
drop in the eye,
and then a warm compress for a few
minutes. Mhmm. Mhmm. And it it is less
swollen today.
She was miserable last night. Poor thing. She
just she didn't wanna really be touched. She
did not wanna get off the couch. No.
Barely wanted a treat. She just
Well, I She's miserable. I I did something
with her that I normally have not done.
I don't think I've ever done it, really.
She was laying on the sofa. She was
she was miserable
after the,
you know and rightfully so.
And,
you know, normally,
in the evening, we have a routine. She
gets her one
biscuit
at night
and she knows when it's when it's getting
ready because I'll come leave the office, I'll
go into the kitchen, I'll make myself a
drink, go sit down and, you know, she'll
hear me rattling around in the kitchen, and
she'll know. And she comes in. She did
not
come in last night, so I took the
biscuit to her. She had she had treats
in bed. Yeah. I mean, I think I
think if you're I've all those funky things,
you get you get a pass. You just
you do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You get to
be babied. Mhmm. You know? And you yeah.
You know, she's I didn't even try to
get her to go into her crate last
night. She just Well, that was a little
that was a little heartbreaking. So she had
She is now at a stage, maybe it's
age, maybe it's
pain, we don't know,
where she does not get up on the
couch that easily most of the time. Now
sometimes she can. She's got her full energy,
and she's bound to it.
So when we got home and she went
for a walk and we got after she
ate, she basically lived on the couch, and
she needed help getting up there, which made
sense. Her she looked miserable.
So she laid up there most of the
night, and then
we started kinda doing our shutdown routine.
And and he didn't make her go in
the crate, so we figured she'd stay in
the bed. Well, she heard rattling around in
the kitchen Yep. And she got curious. So
she got off the couch,
but then just decided not to come to
the kitchen, but I could hear her moving.
I'm like, she's not on the couch anymore.
And then I didn't hear her moving,
and I said, is she trying to get
back up on the couch and got stuck?
Yep. She needed a boost. I I I
went I looked around, and
she had her front paws on the couch,
her head
looking up, and that was all she did.
And when I walked around,
then she
raised up and started to get up, and
I put my hand out. She stepped on
my hand as a Oh.
See, I'm the more of the butt pusher.
I get my hand under her her booty
Yeah. And I just kinda go up, and
she just keeps going. Yeah. But yeah. But,
I I think it's gonna be time soon
for me to build her a little
step. Mhmm. Make it easier for her to
get up there. Could we train her not
to get on the couch? Yeah. But we're
not gonna do that. No. The couch is
definitely hers now because Oh, yeah. It looks
like it's been through some shit. Right. Yeah.
Yeah.
That's her couch.
You know, I'm
yeah.
I mean, I don't mind the sofa. You
know? I mean, for me, the big thing
is the the fur babies, none of them
sleep with us. No. I'm not. And I'm
not built for that. No.
I would have let Saki do it because
he was so little. Mhmm. And he very
rarely smelled like dog. Like, he maybe it's
because he was so little. I don't know.
I don't know.
He did. I mean, it wasn't that he
didn't, but he didn't go outside
the way Lola does. He didn't roll around.
Like, he just Yeah. Didn't have that dog
smell
quite as potently as our Lola girl. Yeah.
But he had no interest. He was like,
no. No. No. No. I'm an old man
with creaky bones. I like my bed over
there in the corner. Please and thank you.
Lola,
if we're we let her come into our
bedroom if we're awake and up, like, not
at night. She she has her space, and
we close the door.
But when we're it's a normal day, if
we're sitting in our bedroom or whatever doing
stuff, she'll walk in and we don't mind.
No. But if we happen to just be
stretched out in the bed,
she'll come up to either side and just
and our bed's kinda high, like,
not feet dangling high, but higher than I
think typical beds.
And she'll come to either side and just
look up at you like, I too would
like to be up there. And I'm like,
Boral,
I can't pick you up.
So
Yeah.
So that was kind of our
our day yesterday.
The day ended with a bang. Yep.
Yeah.
Yep. But she I mean, I think she's
feeling a little bit better if she can
be annoyed at Onyx. Right. And Onyx is
the last one to be annoyed at. Oh.
It's Ella who's kinda pushy. Right.
But I mean, Ella will steal her bed
in a heartbeat. Ella will steal her bed.
Mhmm. And and Lola has never felt like,
yeah. Ella will steal her bed. Mhmm. And
and Lola has never felt like, yeah. Yeah.
I can get up here too. She could.
Ella probably wouldn't even mind, but she won't.
Ella will clean her ears for her. Mhmm.
Will clean in between her toes.
I have questions for Ella. Right. Yeah. Your
king's not my king. Your king's not my
king. Ella ain't right. Ella ain't right.
No.
Thank god she's pretty. Yeah. But Yeah. Yeah.
Onyx is
and Onyx is going to town on that
plastic. Yeah. She is. Looking looking looking.
So, yeah, that's adventures
and fur babies
past 24 hours. Look at her. She is
going. I've I've
I
even if I had my phone, I could
not get a good picture of that.
So imagine a cat licking plastic. Sure. Sure.
But she's licking it so vigorously that the
whole flat of her tongue is coming out,
and you can see nothing but tongue. Mhmm.
And she's moving her whole head back and
forward
to make sure she gets maximum leakage apparently.
She's not biting it or tearing at it.
I think she's just it's licking. Yeah. Yep.
Britney asked what does Ella look like? She
is a, I guess, tuxedo cat. She's a
black and white cat.
I know that it's orange cats who don't
have a brain cell, but, she probably has
some orange cat in her genetics. So Right.
She's got an ancestor who was an orange
cat and Yeah. Did not pass down the
brain cell. We we often say it's a
good thing Ella's cute. Yeah. And she is
a beautiful cat. Oh, yeah. She's got the
pink nose and the perfectly pink little toe
beans.
Onyx is
amazing and and gorgeous too, just in a
different way. Onyx is full black. She's got,
like, 3 little hairs on her chest that
are white, but her toe beans are black.
Her nose is black. Mhmm.
I guess she got done licking the plastic.
Yeah.
It's funny. She's been she's been sleeping on
my pillow.
Mhmm. During the day. Both girls are sitting
on our pillows during the day. And, even
even in the evening. And it's funny, I'll
walk in there in the evening, you know,
and the light's off,
and
I can't really see her,
but then she opens her eyes, and you
see it out of the darkness, these two
little golden eyes. Blah blah.
Onyx does not want your attention. And I
don't even I don't think it's negative. She's
not growling or anything.
But she is £77,
and Onyx is £8. Yeah. Right. So Yep.
Yep. I'm pretty sure Onyx could take her.
Probably would probably kick Lola's ass, quite frankly.
Onyx is a bitch. She I love her.
She's a bitch. Mhmm. She's a Scorpio bitch
though. So we have that in common. Mhmm.
I know, baby. I'm so glad your eyeball
looks like eyeballs are supposed to look.
That was that was rough yesterday. Yeah. It
was.
I know. You're a sweet quarrel.
It's good to see her up and moving
around. Even if she's antagonizing Onyx. Yeah.
So, yeah. That's that's that's
Yeah.
That's it. Honestly.
You know, last last weekend we,
this past weekend we,
managed to escape
for a little bit, and and we went
out thrifting.
To the thrift stores that were open, because
we went on a Sunday like donuts. Mhmm.
Mhmm.
We actually went antiquing. And it ended up
being antiquing. Yeah. Ending antiquing. Because it was
the antique stores that were open, the thrift
stores weren't.
But, it was fun. We had a good
time.
Mhmm. Mhmm. And, we all we both came
away with some stuff. I got a new
coffee ornament. Mhmm. And you got 2 used
albums. Yeah.
Yep.
Oh, yes, ma'am. Is your head tired? You
need to rest it on me? Okay.
So, yeah. I am
Oh, big stretch. Mhmm. She's
okay. That was more of a butthole than
I wanted to see.
So
I think that's a good note to end
on. Yeah.
Lola's butt. No. Mm-mm. That's still wrong.
So, yeah, thank y'all for,
being here with us and letting us ramble
about
provocative
things.
Definitely
TMI.
Don't forget we have the livestream Friday 13th.
That is a week earlier than it would
normally be.
Are we
staying till our normal time, or are we
implementing the new
We'll we'll stay to the normal time. We
won't change that till after. Yeah. And in
2025,
the time when we end that Friday night
livestream will be changing. We'll talk about that
on Friday.
And then, yeah, the kinkery is having a
sale. Free shipping on US orders of $35
more. Thekinkery.com.
And
so, yeah, we're gonna go beat crazy cat
and dog parents now.
Yep. Mhmm. And I'm probably gonna go,
after we record the next thing, dive back
into this book because it's so fucking gone.
Anyway,
we will.
Talk to you next time. Okay. Alright. Bye.
Bye, y'all.