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You're listening to the loving BDSM podcast episode

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419.

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A confused Kayla Lords here with the one,

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the only, the what the fuck was that

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John Brownstone?

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I'll explain later. Okay. Good. He he cued

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me in to start speaking weirdly, and and

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I nope. Nope. Didn't know about that.

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Anyway,

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that's what we're here for.

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This week, we asked Instagram to ask us

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anything, and now we're gonna answer some of

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those questions.

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Welcome to the Loving BDSM podcast. If this

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is your first time listening, glad to have

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you. You're back for another week, welcome back.

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Loving BDSM is produced every Monday Friday for

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your kinky pleasure in education, and show notes

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are found at lovingbdsm.net.

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Come back often and feel free to add

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the podcast to your favorite podcast app. You

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can also follow the show on FetLife at

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loving BDSM PC

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on Instagram and technically threads at that handle

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I will forever fucking hate, loving d s

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and the number 1. So that's at loving

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d s one. Or on YouTube at youtube.com/loving

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BDSM where you can watch us livestream the

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podcast every Wednesday. All links are in the

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show notes. A big thanks as always

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to our kinky patrons over on Patreon, including

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our newest peeps. We are able to keep

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being weirdos on the Internet, in large part

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to our kinky community

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on Patreon.

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We are grateful for every fuck I wanna

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be. If you'd like to join our kinky

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community and get access to extra content and

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a Discord server with a group of super

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cool, super nice, super chill kinksters, you can

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do that. Join us at patreon.com/kaylallords.

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That's patreon.com/kaylallords

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or use the link in the show notes.

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Okay. Before we get into the

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questions, a very simple announcement. It's literally the

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same as last week. All of our Etsy

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shops are on sale. There's sales through the

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end of the year.

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If you want some kinky stuff, the like

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workbooks and coloring books and stickers and whatever,

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loving BDSM Etsy shop. If you are a

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reader and love little bookish things,

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from stickers to tote bag tote bags to

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whatever,

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my Etsy shop book dreams. If you are

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looking for gifts and you like wood and

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you like things that are handmade,

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JB's,

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Etsy shop, the Wood Dom. Every everything's

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on sale. Yep.

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So

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and that'll that'll keep being true. Next week,

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the livestream will be right before Thanksgiving. We

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will talk about Black Friday

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deals, not just ours, but, like, places that

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we're like, no. No. No. Really go check

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them out.

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We'll we'll do a little bit of that.

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But, yeah, just for right now, we're sponsoring

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us because I like to pay the mortgage.

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Yeah. And and, actually,

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I just

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received and am now in possession of

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a candle wax melter

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so that I can make more candles

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faster for the kinkery, and I'm so

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excited.

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So excited.

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I don't have to do a double boiler

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with a little pour thingy or manage to

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make, like, 10 at a time. I I

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hope it works as well for you as

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as it did in the reel that I

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saw it in. And I did try to

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do my research and check yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

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I know. Anyway, anyway,

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we're gonna answer questions.

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So over on Instagram, I basically said ask

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us anything,

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and people did. Uh-oh.

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Okay. So we did get a lot. We're

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not gonna be able to answer them all.

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So

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not even gonna try, but let's see what

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we can get through. And so these questions

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tend to be about just about kink in

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general, but some of them are specific to

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us. So we'll just we'll just do the

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thing.

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What actually goes into planning a scene and

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how do you do it?

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Well,

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you plan the scene. You think about what

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you wanna do. You think about you have

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to know what your options are though. True.

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You gotta, like, do what you can do.

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You you have to know the person that

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you're you're impacting.

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Yeah.

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Yes. If if impact play is what you

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wanna do. Right. Really does it also starts

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with, well, what do you like to do?

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What do you wanna try? What have you

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done before?

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What is interesting to you?

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Then, yeah, what is your partner like? Right.

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Or not like? What are y'all's mutual kinks?

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Mhmm. Does it require

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equipment?

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Can you do it with stuff around your

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house or your hand? Spanking scenes are kind

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of the easiest, assuming you have a hand.

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You're good. Mhmm.

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But, yeah, the planning of it. Yeah. I

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mean, the the planning I mean, you can

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make a scene as as simple or as

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elaborate Right. As you want.

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Okay?

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You know,

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I

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was at the woodshed

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one night and there was an older couple

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on one of the spanking benches, and he

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was just

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for about half hour, 45 minutes, just, like,

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lightly flogging her. Mhmm. And and they were

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having a blast. And I think that's where

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people get themselves messed up. Scene implies, role

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play implies, theatrics.

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Yeah, you can. You can get real real,

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like, intricate. You could have dialogue.

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Not my jam, but go for it. But

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really, it's the kink thing you're doing together.

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Right. I mean, then then another time I

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was there, there was a dom, he was

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dressed up as a,

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circus ringmaster.

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And his

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partner

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was dressed as a unicorn.

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Oh my God, that's so funny.

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Kingsters are creative fuckers, is all I'm saying.

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Yep. Very creative. Yep. And and, you know,

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yeah, you you you need you need to

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think about about the thing, and I I

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I think one of the big things that's

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overlooked a lot

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in, plan planning, any scene are the expectations.

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What are your expectations? What are your partner's

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expectations? Trying to get out of it? Right.

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Right. Yeah. What do you wanna experience?

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Mhmm. And that go that's goes beyond the

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logistics

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of I want you to spank me with

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your hand. I want you to use a

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flogger. I want blah blah blah. It's I

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want to feel this way. I want to

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experience this sensation.

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I'm looking for stress relief. I'm looking for

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orgasms.

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I'm looking for denial. I'm looking for pain.

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Like, what are you looking for? I mean,

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you know, there there were times, even with

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you, you know, you wanted to be

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spanked until you cried Yeah. Because you needed

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that release. And other times, you just wanted

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to be spanked just to kinda, you know,

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let go and float. I want the deep

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tissue massage kind of impact Yeah. So I

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can just melt. That's what that's what I'm

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craving right now. Mhmm. But it scene planning

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starts

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like,

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it's the very first step is figuring out

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what you're curious about or into. Lola

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agrees. Agrees. Okay. Yeah.

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But, yeah, I I do think people make

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it more complicated than it is. Yeah. And

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it can be complex, and there's nothing wrong

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with that. Mhmm. But if you've never seen

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before in your life, just pick a kink

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activity that you either know you like or

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you would like to try to see if

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you like

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that,

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is compatible with a partner.

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And then part of part of scene planning

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is you gotta go learn how to do

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kinks, though. Like, you gotta have been watching

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videos, going to workshops, doing demos, reading books,

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listening to podcasts, like, whatever. However you learn,

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you have to go do that part first.

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Some are easy. Spanking a person, hand, ass,

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kinda done.

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But flogging, that's there's some technique to that.

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I'm thinking of Rah Rah here at needle

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play. Please don't go try that till you've

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learned from somebody who knows what they're doing.

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Right? So

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Yeah. True.

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Okay. Next question. Okay.

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What is our current coffee order

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when we're ordering?

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Like, when we're out in public and we're

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getting coffee. I I've been

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leaning towards,

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cold brew.

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Mhmm. We've been,

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hitting Dunkin'

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A lot. A lot, fairly regularly when we

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when we do go out for coffee right

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now. And,

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I've kinda taken a liking with their with

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their cold brew and, you know, a little

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cream in there and

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some mocha syrup. The yes. No. Not yesterday.

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A few days ago, we we got Dunkin',

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and you got the peppermint

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mocha cold brew with sweet cold foam on

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top. And that was very good. Mhmm. Yeah.

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You were making noises as you were drinking

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it when we were going down the road.

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I I was having cough cough orgasm. I

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mean, I'm not, you know yeah. I'm not

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gonna I'm not gonna hide it.

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You were having a moment. You were having

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a moment.

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My current coffee order so I prefer cold

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brew as well,

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but I'm a broke bitch, so it's usually

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Dunkin' iced coffee.

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And so then it's iced coffee with cream,

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and right now, pumpkin

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syrup or whatever swirl, whatever they call it.

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When that goes away, I'll go back to

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butter pecan. Like, the day Dunkin' added butter

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pecan

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as a sweet flavor to their, like, steady

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menu,

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I'm so happy. But, yeah, if there's extra

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cash, then I'm gonna get cold brew. Or

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if I've got points, I'll get a cold

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brew. And no I there's only really one

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place I like to get espresso drinks from,

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and that's a really special treat. It's a

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local place.

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And if we go in, even when we

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don't get the, like, the biggest size, it's

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still a $15 order between the 2 of

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us. Oh, yeah. So it's a very

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infrequent treat. And it's the only place I

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wanna get espresso drink from. But they the

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the their coffee is Mhmm. Mhmm. Mhmm. Yep.

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Wonderful. Yep. Mhmm. But, yeah, we're we're kinda

265
00:09:33,759 --> 00:09:35,379
simple these days. Yeah.

266
00:09:35,759 --> 00:09:37,360
And that's okay. We don't really get a

267
00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:39,440
lot of coffee out right now. Not right.

268
00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:40,899
We haven't for a while. I've,

269
00:09:41,684 --> 00:09:42,184
I

270
00:09:43,365 --> 00:09:43,865
I,

271
00:09:45,125 --> 00:09:47,445
in mass quantities, make cold brew at home.

272
00:09:47,445 --> 00:09:49,524
So much. Sometimes the fridge is just like

273
00:09:49,845 --> 00:09:51,524
On top of the fridge. Yeah. I can

274
00:09:51,524 --> 00:09:53,205
feel a sneeze coming on. I am so

275
00:09:53,205 --> 00:09:55,125
sorry. That's gonna hit right when I least

276
00:09:55,125 --> 00:09:58,529
expect it. That's not helpful. Okay.

277
00:09:59,629 --> 00:10:02,910
What are both of our favorite adult toys

278
00:10:02,910 --> 00:10:03,410
currently?

279
00:10:08,509 --> 00:10:09,809
I would have to say,

280
00:10:10,125 --> 00:10:10,865
for me,

281
00:10:11,325 --> 00:10:14,144
probably the the WeVibe bond.

282
00:10:14,684 --> 00:10:17,404
That's prostate massager. Right? No. No. Is it

283
00:10:17,404 --> 00:10:19,325
cock ring? That's the that's the cock ring.

284
00:10:19,325 --> 00:10:19,825
Okay.

285
00:10:20,445 --> 00:10:22,605
The vector. Vector is the prostate. Is the

286
00:10:22,605 --> 00:10:23,985
is the prostate. Yeah.

287
00:10:24,379 --> 00:10:26,299
But the cock ring is your is it

288
00:10:26,299 --> 00:10:28,700
a vibrating one? Yes. Are you able to

289
00:10:28,700 --> 00:10:30,799
feel the vibrates? Oh, yeah. Okay.

290
00:10:32,059 --> 00:10:33,500
I mean, I guess I shouldn't have had

291
00:10:33,500 --> 00:10:35,580
to ask that because if I knew if

292
00:10:35,580 --> 00:10:37,815
it was being used on me or with

293
00:10:38,294 --> 00:10:40,154
me, I would have known that. So clearly,

294
00:10:42,615 --> 00:10:44,394
he can feel whatever vibrations.

295
00:10:45,654 --> 00:10:47,735
That that's it for you. I don't currently

296
00:10:47,735 --> 00:10:49,754
have a favorite. I did just,

297
00:10:50,695 --> 00:10:51,835
try 2

298
00:10:54,350 --> 00:10:57,089
vibrators. 1 from WeVibe, 1 from Womanizer.

299
00:10:57,789 --> 00:11:00,829
Different styles than they usually have, which is

300
00:11:00,829 --> 00:11:01,649
very exciting.

301
00:11:03,470 --> 00:11:05,549
I have things I like and dislike about

302
00:11:05,549 --> 00:11:07,709
both, but I have not played with sex

303
00:11:07,709 --> 00:11:09,545
toys prior to these 2

304
00:11:10,004 --> 00:11:10,504
in

305
00:11:10,884 --> 00:11:13,524
a very long time. Minute for you. Yeah.

306
00:11:13,524 --> 00:11:15,465
In probably a year or more.

307
00:11:16,245 --> 00:11:18,404
So I don't currently have a favorite. Now

308
00:11:18,404 --> 00:11:20,585
if we're gonna talk about kink toys,

309
00:11:23,889 --> 00:11:24,709
I don't

310
00:11:25,570 --> 00:11:27,669
other than the kinkery, I don't have

311
00:11:28,610 --> 00:11:30,769
a specific one specific toy, but I have

312
00:11:30,769 --> 00:11:33,490
a specific type. Like, floggers that have, like,

313
00:11:33,490 --> 00:11:35,350
the suede or the soft leather

314
00:11:35,924 --> 00:11:36,424
strands,

315
00:11:37,044 --> 00:11:39,065
are is my favorite. Yeah.

316
00:11:39,605 --> 00:11:40,105
Yeah.

317
00:11:40,404 --> 00:11:41,684
If you ever learned how to make a

318
00:11:41,684 --> 00:11:43,924
flogger, I would be like, oh my god.

319
00:11:43,924 --> 00:11:44,825
Oh my god.

320
00:11:45,445 --> 00:11:47,524
Oh my god. I would not be able

321
00:11:47,524 --> 00:11:48,424
to be contained.

322
00:11:50,460 --> 00:11:54,000
Okay. And next question. Okay. I, switch male,

323
00:11:54,220 --> 00:11:56,539
wanna wear a chastity cage. How do I

324
00:11:56,539 --> 00:11:58,799
bring it up to my partner, switch female?

325
00:11:59,259 --> 00:12:00,000
Both switches.

326
00:12:05,545 --> 00:12:06,605
Talk to them?

327
00:12:07,144 --> 00:12:08,425
You know, I think it depends on how

328
00:12:08,425 --> 00:12:11,085
your dynamic is. You and I negotiate openly

329
00:12:11,465 --> 00:12:12,825
all the time. If one of us has

330
00:12:12,825 --> 00:12:14,985
a thought, we just say it. Yeah. Other

331
00:12:14,985 --> 00:12:17,225
folks might have, like, something more structured. So

332
00:12:17,225 --> 00:12:19,065
if you have that structured time, like, set

333
00:12:19,065 --> 00:12:19,440
it up.

334
00:12:20,159 --> 00:12:22,159
Right. You know, but, yeah, you you you're

335
00:12:22,159 --> 00:12:23,919
gonna have to talk about it one way

336
00:12:23,919 --> 00:12:25,679
or another. You you're gonna have to let

337
00:12:25,679 --> 00:12:27,600
it be known, you know, that this is

338
00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:28,500
what you want.

339
00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:32,080
You know, and and, you know, don't go

340
00:12:32,080 --> 00:12:34,495
in all hot, like, put the zombie, lock

341
00:12:34,495 --> 00:12:36,995
me up. Right. Right. You know,

342
00:12:38,014 --> 00:12:39,695
kind of ease into it, you know, maybe

343
00:12:39,695 --> 00:12:40,195
like,

344
00:12:40,735 --> 00:12:43,054
hey, have you ever heard about, male chastity

345
00:12:43,054 --> 00:12:45,134
devices? Like, what do you think about chastity

346
00:12:45,134 --> 00:12:46,335
cages? What do you think about being a

347
00:12:46,335 --> 00:12:48,279
key holder? Yeah. Yeah. And that's the other

348
00:12:48,279 --> 00:12:50,839
thing. Make sure you're clear on what you're

349
00:12:50,839 --> 00:12:51,980
asking for

350
00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:54,220
your partner to do and to participate.

351
00:12:54,679 --> 00:12:56,440
Do you just want them to know that

352
00:12:56,440 --> 00:12:57,820
you're doing it, and so,

353
00:12:58,440 --> 00:12:59,024
you know,

354
00:12:59,585 --> 00:13:01,985
your junk won't be as accessible? Do you

355
00:13:01,985 --> 00:13:03,985
want them to literally be the key holder

356
00:13:03,985 --> 00:13:06,305
and in charge of when this thing comes

357
00:13:06,305 --> 00:13:09,264
off or gets put back on? Like, think

358
00:13:09,264 --> 00:13:11,585
very clearly about what you're looking for, and

359
00:13:11,585 --> 00:13:12,565
then the conversation

360
00:13:12,865 --> 00:13:16,039
needs to be that negotiation between here's what

361
00:13:16,179 --> 00:13:18,740
my ideal world looks like, and then your

362
00:13:18,740 --> 00:13:20,179
partner gets the opportunity to go, okay. I

363
00:13:20,179 --> 00:13:21,460
don't wanna do that, but I could do

364
00:13:21,460 --> 00:13:23,480
this. We could try that. Blah blah blah.

365
00:13:24,100 --> 00:13:26,360
And then if they're not interested in participating,

366
00:13:26,659 --> 00:13:27,799
I know plenty

367
00:13:28,924 --> 00:13:29,424
of,

368
00:13:29,964 --> 00:13:32,204
people who will just wear a a cock

369
00:13:32,204 --> 00:13:34,044
cage because they like wearing it. They like

370
00:13:34,044 --> 00:13:35,264
the denial for themselves.

371
00:13:36,125 --> 00:13:38,365
So that would always be an option if

372
00:13:38,365 --> 00:13:41,404
your partner's not really down for, you know,

373
00:13:41,404 --> 00:13:43,769
managing your penis for you. Okay?

374
00:13:44,790 --> 00:13:46,309
I mean, if they are down for it,

375
00:13:46,309 --> 00:13:48,009
cool. Have fun. But yeah.

376
00:13:48,870 --> 00:13:49,370
Okay.

377
00:13:55,365 --> 00:13:57,845
I'm not sure I understand exactly what they're

378
00:13:57,845 --> 00:14:00,004
asking for here, so maybe you will and

379
00:14:00,004 --> 00:14:01,204
maybe if I say it out loud, I'll

380
00:14:01,204 --> 00:14:02,824
go, oh, I know what they mean now.

381
00:14:02,964 --> 00:14:06,105
The question is, do you use alter egos?

382
00:14:06,245 --> 00:14:07,845
I find them useful, but at the same

383
00:14:07,845 --> 00:14:09,144
time, it gives me confusion

384
00:14:09,620 --> 00:14:11,320
and even competition inside.

385
00:14:11,699 --> 00:14:13,240
So, like Okay.

386
00:14:14,100 --> 00:14:15,720
Yeah. I do. Okay.

387
00:14:16,579 --> 00:14:18,199
Like, I I know this

388
00:14:19,779 --> 00:14:20,279
mistress.

389
00:14:21,059 --> 00:14:21,559
Okay?

390
00:14:23,299 --> 00:14:24,039
She has

391
00:14:25,004 --> 00:14:27,585
her mistress persona. Mhmm. But then,

392
00:14:29,325 --> 00:14:31,644
she has an alter ego Mhmm. That is

393
00:14:31,644 --> 00:14:34,684
a male persona. Oh, wow. Okay. Okay. So

394
00:14:34,684 --> 00:14:36,524
I I I think that's kinda where they're

395
00:14:36,764 --> 00:14:39,309
Okay. Where they're in the parking. In my

396
00:14:39,309 --> 00:14:41,710
everyday life, I'm legal name. In my kink

397
00:14:41,710 --> 00:14:42,210
life,

398
00:14:42,590 --> 00:14:43,090
I'm,

399
00:14:43,710 --> 00:14:45,790
you know, a little bit different than my

400
00:14:45,790 --> 00:14:47,470
everyday life. Yeah. I mean that that's a

401
00:14:47,470 --> 00:14:49,230
simplistic way of looking at it. You know,

402
00:14:49,230 --> 00:14:51,309
yeah. We we have our vanilla lives and

403
00:14:51,309 --> 00:14:53,809
our alter ego or or, you know, whichever

404
00:14:54,164 --> 00:14:54,664
vice

405
00:14:55,044 --> 00:14:57,284
versa. But, you know, yeah. I I think

406
00:14:57,365 --> 00:14:58,664
I believe that's what they're

407
00:14:59,684 --> 00:15:00,745
they're coming at.

408
00:15:01,365 --> 00:15:03,924
We no. We've never really done any kind

409
00:15:03,924 --> 00:15:05,684
of play like that. No. And I don't

410
00:15:05,684 --> 00:15:08,160
I don't internalize it that way. The the

411
00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:10,160
name Kayla Lords is a pseudonym, and it

412
00:15:10,160 --> 00:15:13,279
has become my kink name, but it's just

413
00:15:13,279 --> 00:15:13,779
another

414
00:15:14,960 --> 00:15:17,360
it's the the kink side of myself, not

415
00:15:17,360 --> 00:15:20,500
an alter ego that I internalize in any

416
00:15:20,559 --> 00:15:22,915
sort of way. Mhmm. Where I don't

417
00:15:23,795 --> 00:15:25,715
that it's not is not the same thing,

418
00:15:25,715 --> 00:15:26,995
but that is too close to role play

419
00:15:26,995 --> 00:15:28,595
for me because now I gotta be somebody.

420
00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:30,514
And that's and that's the thing with you.

421
00:15:30,514 --> 00:15:32,195
Yeah. That That's never gonna happen. For you,

422
00:15:32,195 --> 00:15:33,795
the role play is just not ever gonna

423
00:15:33,795 --> 00:15:36,389
happen. No. No. Oh my god. No. No.

424
00:15:36,450 --> 00:15:38,690
Whatever the opposite of a kink or fetish

425
00:15:38,690 --> 00:15:40,470
is, that. It's a that.

426
00:15:41,169 --> 00:15:42,610
It's a that for me. That's a hard

427
00:15:42,610 --> 00:15:44,450
limit for you. Oh, my god. It gives

428
00:15:44,450 --> 00:15:46,629
me a feeling. I don't like it.

429
00:15:47,169 --> 00:15:49,330
But, you know, the So you were never

430
00:15:49,330 --> 00:15:51,455
a theater kid? Oh, god. No. Oh, god.

431
00:15:51,455 --> 00:15:51,955
No.

432
00:15:52,495 --> 00:15:53,774
No. No. No. No. No. No. I was

433
00:15:53,774 --> 00:15:55,455
a band kid who happened to play an

434
00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:57,554
instrument that put me 3 rows back.

435
00:15:58,174 --> 00:15:58,674
And

436
00:15:59,214 --> 00:16:02,014
marching band kid with a helmet hat thing

437
00:16:02,014 --> 00:16:03,659
on where you could barely see my face.

438
00:16:03,659 --> 00:16:06,220
Oh, no. Oh, no. No. Not a theater

439
00:16:06,220 --> 00:16:07,200
kid. Anyway,

440
00:16:09,100 --> 00:16:10,059
you know, I

441
00:16:10,940 --> 00:16:13,580
if the idea of an alter ego is

442
00:16:13,580 --> 00:16:15,360
no longer helpful to you,

443
00:16:15,899 --> 00:16:18,225
is it something that you can put aside,

444
00:16:18,225 --> 00:16:20,565
put down, give a rest for a while?

445
00:16:21,184 --> 00:16:23,205
Because if if that alter ego

446
00:16:23,904 --> 00:16:26,465
is creating something within you where you you

447
00:16:26,465 --> 00:16:27,684
were literally, like,

448
00:16:28,065 --> 00:16:29,764
your own internal world is, like,

449
00:16:30,080 --> 00:16:32,159
I I feel competitive. I feel I don't

450
00:16:32,159 --> 00:16:33,379
feel good about myself.

451
00:16:34,159 --> 00:16:35,379
I I don't

452
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:38,480
is it helpful anymore to do? And I

453
00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:39,700
I could never

454
00:16:40,399 --> 00:16:42,240
answer that for anybody, but it does make

455
00:16:42,240 --> 00:16:43,940
sense that you will have alter egos

456
00:16:44,639 --> 00:16:47,225
because sometimes you have things you wanna do

457
00:16:47,225 --> 00:16:48,845
that can seem so,

458
00:16:49,465 --> 00:16:51,705
you know, far apart from one another. You

459
00:16:51,705 --> 00:16:52,445
just create,

460
00:16:53,305 --> 00:16:55,144
you know, a different persona for each one,

461
00:16:55,144 --> 00:16:56,665
and I respect that. I just

462
00:16:58,580 --> 00:17:00,440
definitely not my thing. I'm here.

463
00:17:04,900 --> 00:17:05,880
We're gonna let

464
00:17:06,579 --> 00:17:09,079
JB bring Lola back in.

465
00:17:10,099 --> 00:17:12,315
She's been very vocal today. I don't

466
00:17:13,115 --> 00:17:15,115
I didn't I won't have to edit out

467
00:17:15,115 --> 00:17:17,835
as much in Monday's episode as I thought

468
00:17:17,835 --> 00:17:19,674
I would, but you hear Lola in that

469
00:17:19,674 --> 00:17:20,335
one too.

470
00:17:20,954 --> 00:17:21,454
Okay.

471
00:17:23,835 --> 00:17:25,994
What are some good first steps for someone

472
00:17:25,994 --> 00:17:28,799
new to kink to explore if they're single?

473
00:17:30,140 --> 00:17:31,900
There's as many first steps, potential

474
00:17:32,299 --> 00:17:34,080
Yeah. Opportunities as there are, like,

475
00:17:35,180 --> 00:17:37,680
things on planet Earth so that I I

476
00:17:37,980 --> 00:17:39,500
for me, I would I think I would

477
00:17:39,500 --> 00:17:41,019
have to say for someone who's single and

478
00:17:41,019 --> 00:17:42,400
and fairly new to kink,

479
00:17:43,454 --> 00:17:43,954
learn.

480
00:17:44,414 --> 00:17:46,015
In whatever way you like to learn. Whatever

481
00:17:46,015 --> 00:17:47,154
way you like to learn,

482
00:17:47,615 --> 00:17:49,535
whatever you think you might be interested in,

483
00:17:49,535 --> 00:17:51,134
even in some things you you may not

484
00:17:51,134 --> 00:17:53,295
be interested in, you may just explore them

485
00:17:53,295 --> 00:17:54,815
to find, you know, whether you like them

486
00:17:54,815 --> 00:17:57,519
or or you don't. But learn learn everything

487
00:17:57,519 --> 00:18:00,080
you can about what you can. Yep. I

488
00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:03,039
mean, there's nothing wrong with by yourself, single

489
00:18:03,039 --> 00:18:04,259
single kinkster,

490
00:18:04,799 --> 00:18:07,279
taking the, doing a BDSM checklist by yourself.

491
00:18:07,279 --> 00:18:08,565
They're geared often towards

492
00:18:10,484 --> 00:18:12,085
But they don't like, you use them on

493
00:18:12,085 --> 00:18:14,164
your own and then their conversation starts. So

494
00:18:14,164 --> 00:18:15,684
go through a list and go Yep. I

495
00:18:15,684 --> 00:18:17,444
don't even know what that is. So maybe

496
00:18:17,444 --> 00:18:19,125
that means you're just not worried about learning

497
00:18:19,125 --> 00:18:19,944
about it now.

498
00:18:20,404 --> 00:18:22,164
Maybe you're like, oh, then I'm gonna add

499
00:18:22,164 --> 00:18:24,460
that to my research list. Right? Like, do

500
00:18:24,460 --> 00:18:25,759
that. Yep.

501
00:18:26,220 --> 00:18:27,840
Yeah. If you're a video watcher,

502
00:18:28,620 --> 00:18:31,660
YouTube is they're kinksters aren't there. If you're

503
00:18:31,660 --> 00:18:33,279
a podcast listener, if you're a reader

504
00:18:33,660 --> 00:18:34,940
Mhmm. Like, what whatever

505
00:18:35,340 --> 00:18:37,054
If if if you're lucky enough, if you

506
00:18:37,054 --> 00:18:38,755
live in an area where there are workshops

507
00:18:38,894 --> 00:18:40,815
or or, you know, different things like that,

508
00:18:40,815 --> 00:18:42,515
those are fantastic to attend.

509
00:18:42,974 --> 00:18:44,335
A lot of times you can,

510
00:18:44,974 --> 00:18:47,554
you know, actually do some hands on. Right.

511
00:18:47,694 --> 00:18:49,615
Because the more you learn about what you're

512
00:18:49,615 --> 00:18:52,755
into and how things can can be done,

513
00:18:53,109 --> 00:18:55,289
then that gives you a direction for exploring

514
00:18:55,990 --> 00:18:57,130
beyond the theoretical

515
00:18:57,509 --> 00:18:59,750
and into the physical Mhmm. In whatever way

516
00:18:59,750 --> 00:19:01,849
that might work for you. But, yeah, the

517
00:19:02,389 --> 00:19:05,429
there's no bad time to learn about kink

518
00:19:05,429 --> 00:19:07,130
if you're into it and interested.

519
00:19:07,434 --> 00:19:09,035
But when you are single and you're not

520
00:19:09,035 --> 00:19:10,795
actively looking for a partner, this is a

521
00:19:10,795 --> 00:19:13,154
great time. Just just focus on you Yep.

522
00:19:13,275 --> 00:19:15,035
And what you're into and how other people

523
00:19:15,035 --> 00:19:17,375
are doing things and take in what resonates

524
00:19:17,434 --> 00:19:19,455
and reject the stuff that doesn't. And,

525
00:19:19,849 --> 00:19:21,930
you know, that means, ideally, by the time

526
00:19:21,930 --> 00:19:23,609
you're either ready to meet somebody or you

527
00:19:23,609 --> 00:19:24,910
just happen to meet somebody,

528
00:19:25,450 --> 00:19:28,330
you are able to talk about your boundaries,

529
00:19:28,330 --> 00:19:30,330
your wants, your needs, your things you're curious

530
00:19:30,330 --> 00:19:31,789
about, and and you're

531
00:19:32,170 --> 00:19:32,670
more

532
00:19:34,605 --> 00:19:36,625
educated on it. And so it's

533
00:19:37,085 --> 00:19:37,585
harder,

534
00:19:38,045 --> 00:19:39,664
not impossible, but harder

535
00:19:39,965 --> 00:19:42,224
for, you know, predatory bullshit

536
00:19:42,845 --> 00:19:44,465
because you're aware. Mhmm.

537
00:19:49,059 --> 00:19:50,500
I think this is a long distance question

538
00:19:50,500 --> 00:19:52,099
because it says, as a Dom, that is

539
00:19:52,099 --> 00:19:53,639
far I'm gonna go with away.

540
00:19:54,019 --> 00:19:55,859
How do I help my sub with sub

541
00:19:55,859 --> 00:19:56,359
drop?

542
00:20:02,065 --> 00:20:03,845
That's that's kind of tough, especially

543
00:20:04,465 --> 00:20:06,244
if you're in different time zones.

544
00:20:07,265 --> 00:20:08,785
You plan for it though. But you but

545
00:20:08,785 --> 00:20:10,384
you plan. Yeah. I mean, we were in

546
00:20:10,384 --> 00:20:12,144
different time zones and and that's what we

547
00:20:12,144 --> 00:20:14,819
did. We we planned for it And we

548
00:20:14,819 --> 00:20:16,419
were lucky enough that we were able to

549
00:20:16,419 --> 00:20:18,339
plan for it, and that we were able

550
00:20:18,339 --> 00:20:20,200
to create a a pretty

551
00:20:20,660 --> 00:20:23,220
set schedule that we could, you know, reach

552
00:20:23,220 --> 00:20:24,200
out to one another.

553
00:20:25,140 --> 00:20:27,720
You know, as far as helping them with

554
00:20:27,859 --> 00:20:29,079
with, SubDrop,

555
00:20:30,085 --> 00:20:30,825
you know,

556
00:20:31,765 --> 00:20:33,765
be be open to text messaging or phone

557
00:20:33,765 --> 00:20:34,265
calls.

558
00:20:34,644 --> 00:20:35,144
Yep.

559
00:20:35,445 --> 00:20:37,845
Or face to FaceTime or whatever your version

560
00:20:37,845 --> 00:20:39,205
is. FaceTime or Zoom, any

561
00:20:40,244 --> 00:20:41,845
You know, I've a lot of people want

562
00:20:41,845 --> 00:20:44,869
to fix or prevent drop for dom or

563
00:20:44,869 --> 00:20:47,430
sub completely. Mhmm. I've I've never heard of

564
00:20:47,430 --> 00:20:50,150
a thing that sounds valid that could actually

565
00:20:50,150 --> 00:20:52,230
prevent it. Yeah. All you can kind of

566
00:20:52,230 --> 00:20:53,829
do is mitigate it. So part of that

567
00:20:53,829 --> 00:20:55,450
is knowing that it's a possibility.

568
00:20:57,585 --> 00:20:59,744
The very beginning, I was shocked the few

569
00:20:59,744 --> 00:21:01,265
times I went through drop because I did

570
00:21:01,345 --> 00:21:02,865
until I understood what was happening. I was

571
00:21:02,865 --> 00:21:04,384
like, what is wrong with me? So you

572
00:21:04,384 --> 00:21:06,465
have to have an understanding that it can

573
00:21:06,465 --> 00:21:06,965
happen.

574
00:21:08,465 --> 00:21:10,859
If you've already experienced it before, your partner

575
00:21:11,019 --> 00:21:11,759
already experienced it before,

576
00:21:12,940 --> 00:21:15,019
1, it can feel different each time. But

577
00:21:15,019 --> 00:21:18,299
2, how like, is it an emotional thing

578
00:21:18,299 --> 00:21:19,579
or is it a physical thing or is

579
00:21:19,579 --> 00:21:20,480
it both? Because

580
00:21:20,859 --> 00:21:22,240
what you prepare for

581
00:21:22,700 --> 00:21:25,105
is determined by how you typically

582
00:21:25,565 --> 00:21:26,065
experience

583
00:21:26,605 --> 00:21:28,845
drop. I have gotten it all 3. It's

584
00:21:28,845 --> 00:21:30,524
been an emotional drop. It's been a physical

585
00:21:30,524 --> 00:21:32,365
drop. It's been a both. And I thought

586
00:21:32,365 --> 00:21:34,365
I was losing my mind that time because

587
00:21:34,365 --> 00:21:36,690
I was like, I am both sad and

588
00:21:36,690 --> 00:21:38,849
I have the flu. What is happening? It's

589
00:21:38,849 --> 00:21:40,690
kind if you don't know what it is,

590
00:21:40,690 --> 00:21:43,089
it's Right. Kinda like what's going on. You

591
00:21:43,089 --> 00:21:44,529
know, this is a little scary. We know

592
00:21:44,529 --> 00:21:46,450
it just came on so quick. So then

593
00:21:46,450 --> 00:21:47,970
you have to think about comfort items. What

594
00:21:47,970 --> 00:21:50,115
comforts me when I'm sad? What what makes

595
00:21:50,115 --> 00:21:52,195
me feel better when my body doesn't feel

596
00:21:52,195 --> 00:21:54,755
good? And you you try you do your

597
00:21:54,755 --> 00:21:57,075
best to plan so you have the things

598
00:21:57,075 --> 00:21:58,934
you need that will help you feel good.

599
00:21:59,075 --> 00:22:02,700
As a partner helping your partner through drop

600
00:22:02,700 --> 00:22:05,819
from a distance, it's it's connection. It's talking

601
00:22:05,819 --> 00:22:06,720
about it. It's

602
00:22:07,660 --> 00:22:09,419
you and I did this many times and

603
00:22:09,419 --> 00:22:10,799
it wasn't even through drop.

604
00:22:11,339 --> 00:22:13,839
We would be on the phone or connected

605
00:22:13,900 --> 00:22:15,884
in some way. We were just breathing to

606
00:22:15,884 --> 00:22:17,325
one another. I wasn't even neither of us

607
00:22:17,325 --> 00:22:19,884
was talking, but we were existing there at

608
00:22:19,884 --> 00:22:22,465
the same time. And that can be comforting.

609
00:22:22,525 --> 00:22:23,025
So,

610
00:22:23,325 --> 00:22:26,525
you know, the ideally, you talk about it

611
00:22:26,525 --> 00:22:29,085
out outside of it happening. Like, especially if

612
00:22:29,085 --> 00:22:30,319
you know that a possibility

613
00:22:30,619 --> 00:22:31,980
and you've gotten you know, you or your

614
00:22:31,980 --> 00:22:34,159
partner have gone through it, you talk about

615
00:22:34,380 --> 00:22:35,579
what did it feel like, what do you

616
00:22:35,579 --> 00:22:37,679
think would be helpful, what can we plan

617
00:22:37,740 --> 00:22:38,240
for,

618
00:22:38,940 --> 00:22:41,179
and then all that is gonna do is

619
00:22:41,179 --> 00:22:41,679
is

620
00:22:42,505 --> 00:22:44,845
make it feel maybe a little less shitty

621
00:22:45,944 --> 00:22:47,964
until it passes. Yeah.

622
00:22:48,424 --> 00:22:50,265
But, yeah, that's kind of the sort of

623
00:22:50,265 --> 00:22:53,144
the best I've ever heard or found that

624
00:22:53,144 --> 00:22:54,444
you can do. Mhmm.

625
00:22:55,065 --> 00:22:55,565
So

626
00:22:56,424 --> 00:22:59,240
next question. These are kinda going quick, so

627
00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:00,059
this is interesting.

628
00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:04,140
I

629
00:23:07,319 --> 00:23:09,319
I'm gonna read the question, but that's not

630
00:23:09,319 --> 00:23:11,559
actually the question I wanna answer and wait

631
00:23:11,559 --> 00:23:12,460
till you hear.

632
00:23:13,035 --> 00:23:16,414
Where would you recommend that beginner subs,

633
00:23:16,715 --> 00:23:17,934
newbie baby subs,

634
00:23:18,795 --> 00:23:20,335
start finding a dom?

635
00:23:20,795 --> 00:23:22,634
Where where should baby subs go to find

636
00:23:22,634 --> 00:23:23,775
themselves a dom?

637
00:23:24,154 --> 00:23:25,455
Can I be a bitch?

638
00:23:26,234 --> 00:23:28,200
Baby subs? I'm so happy that you've figured

639
00:23:28,759 --> 00:23:30,599
submissive. The first thing I want you to

640
00:23:30,599 --> 00:23:32,759
do is not go find a dog. I

641
00:23:32,759 --> 00:23:34,700
don't want that to be the thing you

642
00:23:34,759 --> 00:23:36,619
do as a newbie baby sub.

643
00:23:37,480 --> 00:23:39,480
It's not. I want you to go learn

644
00:23:39,480 --> 00:23:41,605
something. I want you to do a BDSM

645
00:23:41,904 --> 00:23:42,404
checklist.

646
00:23:42,785 --> 00:23:45,505
I want you to figure your shit out.

647
00:23:45,505 --> 00:23:47,105
Right. A little bit. Now, you don't have

648
00:23:47,105 --> 00:23:49,205
to know everything, but a little bit. Enough

649
00:23:49,265 --> 00:23:50,005
that you

650
00:23:50,465 --> 00:23:52,384
will be safe on, you know Oh, my

651
00:23:52,384 --> 00:23:53,525
god, please. Understand

652
00:23:54,224 --> 00:23:55,765
some of the things that you like,

653
00:23:56,149 --> 00:23:59,029
understand things you don't like, know what your

654
00:23:59,029 --> 00:24:01,190
boundaries and hard limits are. Right. And then

655
00:24:01,190 --> 00:24:03,750
the dissatisfying answer to the actual question being

656
00:24:03,750 --> 00:24:07,369
asked, wherever people are, there are kinky people.

657
00:24:07,750 --> 00:24:09,269
So are you do you wanna meet somebody

658
00:24:09,269 --> 00:24:11,105
online? Do you wanna meet them in person?

659
00:24:11,105 --> 00:24:11,764
In person,

660
00:24:12,784 --> 00:24:14,865
find in person community. Go to a much.

661
00:24:14,865 --> 00:24:17,024
You know? Get get involved with the local

662
00:24:17,024 --> 00:24:17,524
community

663
00:24:17,825 --> 00:24:19,924
if you feel comfortable doing that.

664
00:24:20,224 --> 00:24:21,825
If that's not an option for you or

665
00:24:21,825 --> 00:24:23,505
that's not what you wanna do, then you

666
00:24:23,505 --> 00:24:24,244
go online

667
00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:28,920
and you really can find kinksters everywhere. Mhmm.

668
00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:31,980
They're harder to find on non kink spaces,

669
00:24:33,559 --> 00:24:36,779
on in non kink spaces, but they're there.

670
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:39,255
You can go to FetLife, but that's another

671
00:24:39,255 --> 00:24:41,575
reason I don't I don't want beginner baby

672
00:24:41,575 --> 00:24:43,654
subs worried about finding a dom. Because you

673
00:24:43,654 --> 00:24:45,174
go to FetLife and you don't know any

674
00:24:45,174 --> 00:24:47,095
better, it is very easy for the predators

675
00:24:47,095 --> 00:24:49,515
to be like, oh, look, fresh meat.

676
00:24:51,894 --> 00:24:52,615
But, yeah, it

677
00:24:53,460 --> 00:24:55,380
people want there to be this magic place

678
00:24:55,380 --> 00:24:57,700
where, like, all the doms are housed waiting

679
00:24:57,700 --> 00:24:59,539
to be found by single subs, or all

680
00:24:59,539 --> 00:25:01,859
the subs live waiting to be found by,

681
00:25:01,859 --> 00:25:02,679
you know, dom

682
00:25:02,980 --> 00:25:05,940
no. Wherever people are, that's where kinky people

683
00:25:05,940 --> 00:25:07,700
are. If you're gonna try and find a

684
00:25:07,700 --> 00:25:09,585
part a kink partner in a non kink

685
00:25:09,585 --> 00:25:11,045
space, you have to be very intentional

686
00:25:11,744 --> 00:25:13,825
and you have to, you know, put out

687
00:25:13,825 --> 00:25:15,365
the signals and signs

688
00:25:15,744 --> 00:25:17,825
that, hey. I am kinky looking for a

689
00:25:17,825 --> 00:25:18,724
kinky partner.

690
00:25:19,025 --> 00:25:20,830
Or you go to kink spaces, and I

691
00:25:20,830 --> 00:25:22,110
want you to be a little bit more

692
00:25:22,110 --> 00:25:25,309
educated about how to navigate kink before you

693
00:25:25,309 --> 00:25:27,470
worry about getting a partner, especially in those

694
00:25:27,470 --> 00:25:27,970
spaces.

695
00:25:28,750 --> 00:25:29,250
Yeah.

696
00:25:29,950 --> 00:25:30,930
Lecture over.

697
00:25:32,430 --> 00:25:33,410
Lecture over.

698
00:25:36,515 --> 00:25:38,194
Some of these questions kind of relate to

699
00:25:38,194 --> 00:25:39,714
one another and had I been a better

700
00:25:39,714 --> 00:25:41,414
planner, I could have put them all together.

701
00:25:43,154 --> 00:25:45,394
So we've answered this before. We've answered many

702
00:25:45,394 --> 00:25:47,250
of these before. That's okay. This one is

703
00:25:47,250 --> 00:25:48,930
similar to our one of our top questions.

704
00:25:48,930 --> 00:25:50,789
But how do you come up with ideas

705
00:25:51,009 --> 00:25:51,509
for

706
00:25:51,890 --> 00:25:54,049
scenes or new kinks or things you wanna

707
00:25:54,049 --> 00:25:54,549
try?

708
00:25:57,250 --> 00:25:59,329
It's kind of the same way as anything

709
00:25:59,329 --> 00:26:00,390
else. What is interesting?

710
00:26:00,769 --> 00:26:01,269
Right.

711
00:26:01,650 --> 00:26:02,470
That's where

712
00:26:03,914 --> 00:26:06,875
being in on, kink spaces, online or in

713
00:26:06,875 --> 00:26:09,674
person, is so valuable because you will see

714
00:26:09,674 --> 00:26:10,174
somebody

715
00:26:10,474 --> 00:26:12,714
talking about something or doing something and you'll

716
00:26:12,714 --> 00:26:13,534
go, oh,

717
00:26:13,914 --> 00:26:16,095
I didn't even know that thing existed.

718
00:26:16,549 --> 00:26:18,390
And if it resonates with you, you'll be

719
00:26:18,390 --> 00:26:20,569
like, oh, maybe I should go learn more.

720
00:26:20,630 --> 00:26:22,549
Maybe I need to do some googling. Maybe

721
00:26:22,549 --> 00:26:23,990
I need to go to a workshop. And

722
00:26:23,990 --> 00:26:26,549
then the the ideas can start to flow

723
00:26:26,549 --> 00:26:28,890
because you're being inspired by

724
00:26:29,349 --> 00:26:31,049
the very real experiences

725
00:26:31,349 --> 00:26:32,169
around you.

726
00:26:33,804 --> 00:26:35,664
But, yeah, it it's more of

727
00:26:36,924 --> 00:26:38,684
a going to learn about the things that

728
00:26:38,684 --> 00:26:40,444
kind of interest you and seeing

729
00:26:41,325 --> 00:26:41,825
so

730
00:26:42,125 --> 00:26:43,804
we could say spanking. We could say impact

731
00:26:43,804 --> 00:26:45,724
play. We could say paddles. We're unpicking impact

732
00:26:45,724 --> 00:26:46,890
play because that's our

733
00:26:47,450 --> 00:26:50,250
fave. That that one word or that little

734
00:26:50,250 --> 00:26:52,829
phrase impact play means about

735
00:26:53,369 --> 00:26:56,109
50, 11000000 things. Right? Yeah. So

736
00:26:56,809 --> 00:26:59,365
a thing that sounds interesting to you will

737
00:26:59,365 --> 00:27:01,845
conjure up probably one image in your head

738
00:27:01,845 --> 00:27:03,365
when you're new and and haven't, you know,

739
00:27:03,365 --> 00:27:05,444
learned about something yet. And you'll go, oh,

740
00:27:05,444 --> 00:27:07,044
yeah. Maybe I'm kind of into that, but

741
00:27:07,044 --> 00:27:08,265
then you'll start learning.

742
00:27:08,644 --> 00:27:09,704
Videos, podcasts,

743
00:27:10,085 --> 00:27:12,565
works like, whatever, online education, like, however you're

744
00:27:12,565 --> 00:27:15,309
gonna learn. And you'll go, oh, this topic

745
00:27:15,309 --> 00:27:16,529
is clearly deeper

746
00:27:16,829 --> 00:27:19,009
than I knew it was, and now

747
00:27:19,309 --> 00:27:21,789
you have almost an infinite number of ways

748
00:27:21,789 --> 00:27:23,869
to explore that thing you thought of in

749
00:27:23,869 --> 00:27:27,089
one turn. So the more you go learn

750
00:27:27,149 --> 00:27:30,525
and experience and witness and hear from and

751
00:27:30,525 --> 00:27:32,924
talk to people about what they're doing, the

752
00:27:32,924 --> 00:27:33,904
more you're inspired,

753
00:27:34,285 --> 00:27:35,644
the more you go, oh, that's a thing

754
00:27:35,644 --> 00:27:37,565
I never heard of. That kind of intrigues

755
00:27:37,565 --> 00:27:39,325
me. Let me go learn. Let me go

756
00:27:39,325 --> 00:27:40,924
try. And next thing you know, you've got

757
00:27:40,924 --> 00:27:42,684
a a new king to try, a new

758
00:27:42,684 --> 00:27:43,589
scene to try. Mhmm.

759
00:27:44,630 --> 00:27:45,529
Mhmm. Mhmm.

760
00:27:45,990 --> 00:27:46,950
It's the very,

761
00:27:48,230 --> 00:27:49,210
boring but

762
00:27:49,909 --> 00:27:52,309
Yeah. I I knew. Kind of like the

763
00:27:52,309 --> 00:27:54,869
answer. You know? It's why, you know, man,

764
00:27:54,869 --> 00:27:57,589
I I can feel the eye rolls from

765
00:27:57,589 --> 00:27:59,085
some folks when we talk about

766
00:27:59,565 --> 00:28:01,724
community and and why we think community is

767
00:28:01,724 --> 00:28:05,085
so important. There's many reasons community in whatever

768
00:28:05,085 --> 00:28:07,984
form you have it in is important, but

769
00:28:08,444 --> 00:28:10,924
the seeing all the ways that things can

770
00:28:10,924 --> 00:28:14,119
be done Mhmm. Is huge. Yeah.

771
00:28:14,980 --> 00:28:16,440
Anything you would add? Nope.

772
00:28:19,460 --> 00:28:19,960
Mm-mm.

773
00:28:20,500 --> 00:28:21,000
Okay.

774
00:28:21,299 --> 00:28:23,619
This will be the last one from this

775
00:28:23,619 --> 00:28:25,700
collection, and this has gone so quick that

776
00:28:25,700 --> 00:28:27,059
I think we'll be able to take some

777
00:28:27,059 --> 00:28:28,355
from the live stream

778
00:28:28,931 --> 00:28:29,431
Okay.

779
00:28:30,008 --> 00:28:34,278
Audience. So that'll be fun. How do I

780
00:28:34,316 --> 00:28:38,585
approach kink with a spouse that does not

781
00:28:38,623 --> 00:28:42,893
understand it? Carefully? Yeah. Yeah. Carefully. You know,

782
00:28:42,931 --> 00:28:43,431
unfortunately,

783
00:28:44,349 --> 00:28:46,109
I mean, you can you can if if

784
00:28:46,109 --> 00:28:47,809
it's a matter of not understanding,

785
00:28:49,950 --> 00:28:51,809
you know, you you can give them

786
00:28:52,429 --> 00:28:54,509
articles to read, blog, you know, blog posts,

787
00:28:54,509 --> 00:28:56,450
books, anything like that,

788
00:28:57,335 --> 00:28:58,714
you know, that you can,

789
00:29:02,134 --> 00:29:03,575
that that you can do to help, you

790
00:29:03,575 --> 00:29:04,875
know, gain some understanding.

791
00:29:06,454 --> 00:29:08,375
Now if it's just a matter of the

792
00:29:08,375 --> 00:29:09,994
fact that you're kinky,

793
00:29:10,535 --> 00:29:11,035
and

794
00:29:11,519 --> 00:29:13,940
they don't understand it and don't want it,

795
00:29:14,640 --> 00:29:16,799
you know, then, unfortunately, there's nothing you can

796
00:29:16,799 --> 00:29:19,680
do. You can't make your partner want to

797
00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:21,440
be kinky for you or want to try

798
00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:24,740
it. You can create an environment where

799
00:29:25,279 --> 00:29:25,779
they

800
00:29:27,194 --> 00:29:29,595
can decide for themselves that they maybe become

801
00:29:29,595 --> 00:29:30,815
more comfortable with the idea

802
00:29:31,194 --> 00:29:34,394
over time. Slowly, they're willing to maybe look

803
00:29:34,394 --> 00:29:36,315
into it. Maybe they're willing to look into

804
00:29:36,315 --> 00:29:39,150
it just enough to support your interest. It

805
00:29:39,150 --> 00:29:41,070
does depend a lot on what kind of

806
00:29:41,070 --> 00:29:43,390
relationship you have with your spouse. If it's

807
00:29:43,390 --> 00:29:45,630
a contentious one where they don't usually like

808
00:29:45,630 --> 00:29:47,150
the things you like or if it's something

809
00:29:47,150 --> 00:29:50,670
they dislike or don't know about, it's like

810
00:29:50,670 --> 00:29:52,644
they shut down and shut it off, and

811
00:29:52,644 --> 00:29:54,585
they're just really not interested. If anything,

812
00:29:55,204 --> 00:29:57,765
then that's gonna translate to kink if they're

813
00:29:57,765 --> 00:30:00,484
not into it. Right. Now I I know

814
00:30:00,484 --> 00:30:01,865
for me early on,

815
00:30:02,164 --> 00:30:04,825
you know, obviously, coming into the the, lifestyle,

816
00:30:05,099 --> 00:30:06,619
I there were a lot of things I

817
00:30:06,619 --> 00:30:07,519
did not know,

818
00:30:08,779 --> 00:30:10,400
a lot of things I didn't understand.

819
00:30:11,179 --> 00:30:13,440
And what helped me was

820
00:30:15,259 --> 00:30:16,400
attending a munch,

821
00:30:17,500 --> 00:30:18,720
and meeting folks,

822
00:30:19,259 --> 00:30:21,775
and and just talking to them. They them

823
00:30:21,775 --> 00:30:23,875
telling me about their experiences, how

824
00:30:24,174 --> 00:30:24,674
how

825
00:30:24,975 --> 00:30:27,715
kink impacts them, what kink does for them.

826
00:30:27,855 --> 00:30:30,414
And and that was a big help for

827
00:30:30,414 --> 00:30:32,734
me, big thing that helped me, you know,

828
00:30:32,734 --> 00:30:34,654
understand a lot of things that that I

829
00:30:34,654 --> 00:30:35,394
did not

830
00:30:36,640 --> 00:30:37,700
know anything about.

831
00:30:38,079 --> 00:30:40,319
Yeah. I mean, but it that's from your

832
00:30:40,319 --> 00:30:41,920
perspective as the one who was interested in

833
00:30:41,920 --> 00:30:43,920
it and had to explore. Yeah. We you

834
00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:45,679
and I have and I think you've even

835
00:30:45,679 --> 00:30:46,400
said it on this,

836
00:30:47,039 --> 00:30:48,019
podcast before.

837
00:30:49,015 --> 00:30:49,755
Your previous spouse

838
00:30:50,535 --> 00:30:51,515
had a very

839
00:30:52,855 --> 00:30:55,974
distinct and unpleasant re reaction and response, and

840
00:30:55,974 --> 00:30:56,954
so there was

841
00:30:57,414 --> 00:31:00,535
no real room to navigate that. No. That

842
00:31:00,535 --> 00:31:01,595
got shut down.

843
00:31:02,519 --> 00:31:04,119
If you said it, I am so sorry

844
00:31:04,119 --> 00:31:04,619
because

845
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:07,000
the the brain just fuzzed out for a

846
00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:08,680
few minutes. There's, like, some light noise in

847
00:31:08,680 --> 00:31:09,340
my head.

848
00:31:10,200 --> 00:31:11,880
If you're gonna talk about it with your

849
00:31:11,880 --> 00:31:13,880
partner and you don't know how they feel

850
00:31:13,880 --> 00:31:16,515
about kink. Right? Like, you don't you know

851
00:31:16,515 --> 00:31:17,815
that maybe they're not

852
00:31:18,115 --> 00:31:20,274
into it in the sense of they did

853
00:31:20,274 --> 00:31:21,875
not approach you with kink, but you don't

854
00:31:21,875 --> 00:31:24,674
know their deep down opinion about it? Start

855
00:31:24,674 --> 00:31:25,575
with hypotheticals.

856
00:31:26,674 --> 00:31:28,835
Mhmm. Have you heard of? What do you

857
00:31:28,835 --> 00:31:29,549
think about?

858
00:31:29,950 --> 00:31:30,769
Have you know?

859
00:31:31,470 --> 00:31:33,950
The it that gives you at least a

860
00:31:33,950 --> 00:31:36,110
place to start with of Yes. What their

861
00:31:36,110 --> 00:31:37,250
reaction might be.

862
00:31:38,269 --> 00:31:40,769
But also think very honestly

863
00:31:41,070 --> 00:31:41,570
about

864
00:31:42,674 --> 00:31:46,134
your current relationship and how y'all communicate. Okay?

865
00:31:46,515 --> 00:31:47,975
Because telling somebody

866
00:31:48,355 --> 00:31:50,755
you're kinky and you wanna try x y

867
00:31:50,755 --> 00:31:51,255
z

868
00:31:51,795 --> 00:31:53,495
is a moment for vulnerability.

869
00:31:54,035 --> 00:31:56,090
Okay? You are you're bearing a part of

870
00:31:56,090 --> 00:31:58,570
your soul to your partner. And if they

871
00:31:58,570 --> 00:32:00,029
are not the type,

872
00:32:00,570 --> 00:32:02,330
if you're very honest with yourself and you

873
00:32:02,330 --> 00:32:04,410
think back about all the other times you've

874
00:32:04,410 --> 00:32:06,650
had to be vulnerable with one another, if

875
00:32:06,650 --> 00:32:07,869
they are not

876
00:32:08,224 --> 00:32:10,144
a safe place for you, if they are

877
00:32:10,144 --> 00:32:10,644
not

878
00:32:11,105 --> 00:32:13,505
typically open minded enough to at least listen,

879
00:32:13,505 --> 00:32:15,585
even if they ultimately don't like it, if

880
00:32:15,585 --> 00:32:17,125
they do not typically

881
00:32:17,424 --> 00:32:20,224
support the things that you're into, even if

882
00:32:20,224 --> 00:32:22,325
they themselves are not into it,

883
00:32:23,025 --> 00:32:24,650
I'm just gonna say don't expect a different

884
00:32:24,650 --> 00:32:26,829
reaction than that. Yeah. If they're mostly

885
00:32:27,450 --> 00:32:29,289
open with you and, like, happy to support

886
00:32:29,289 --> 00:32:30,990
you even if it's not their thing

887
00:32:31,289 --> 00:32:33,529
or willing to listen to stuff that they

888
00:32:33,529 --> 00:32:36,174
don't wanna do but you're curious about, that's

889
00:32:36,174 --> 00:32:38,575
at least a starting point. That's that's a

890
00:32:38,575 --> 00:32:39,954
basis for the conversations.

891
00:32:41,775 --> 00:32:43,855
But I see too many people who are

892
00:32:43,855 --> 00:32:45,535
like, I'm into this thing. I think it'll

893
00:32:45,535 --> 00:32:47,695
make our relationship better. And then they just

894
00:32:47,695 --> 00:32:50,430
decide their partners are completely different people than

895
00:32:50,430 --> 00:32:51,490
they actually are.

896
00:32:51,869 --> 00:32:53,710
And then they're shocked when it did not

897
00:32:53,710 --> 00:32:55,390
go well. I think the other thing is

898
00:32:55,390 --> 00:32:56,450
is you can't push.

899
00:32:56,910 --> 00:32:58,670
You've gotta be open to the fact that

900
00:32:58,670 --> 00:33:01,070
your partner may go, I am not into

901
00:33:01,070 --> 00:33:02,210
that, or I'm not interested, or I don't

902
00:33:02,345 --> 00:33:03,404
or I don't

903
00:33:05,545 --> 00:33:06,086
have time for this, or this makes me

904
00:33:06,086 --> 00:33:06,628
uncomfortable. You've gotta be okay with hearing that.

905
00:33:06,628 --> 00:33:07,169
It doesn't mean it's gonna be easy to

906
00:33:07,169 --> 00:33:08,105
hear. No. But you got you cannot push.

907
00:33:08,105 --> 00:33:09,224
If you push too hard, come across too

908
00:33:09,224 --> 00:33:11,464
forceful or aggressive, it is very easy to

909
00:33:11,464 --> 00:33:12,045
push somebody

910
00:33:17,670 --> 00:33:18,869
so far. They're like, I don't even let's

911
00:33:18,869 --> 00:33:20,570
not even fucking talk about this anymore.

912
00:33:21,029 --> 00:33:23,289
You know, you've gotta create the space for,

913
00:33:23,830 --> 00:33:25,670
I've said the thing. I'm into it. I'm

914
00:33:25,670 --> 00:33:27,430
gonna do my own research. I'm gonna go

915
00:33:27,430 --> 00:33:29,049
learn. Maybe you go to a munch.

916
00:33:29,509 --> 00:33:31,590
And they just know that you're not pushing

917
00:33:31,590 --> 00:33:32,765
it, but but they know that if they

918
00:33:32,765 --> 00:33:34,704
had a question, they could ask you. Mhmm.

919
00:33:35,164 --> 00:33:35,664
And,

920
00:33:35,964 --> 00:33:37,325
I mean, sometimes it's a little bit of

921
00:33:37,325 --> 00:33:38,944
just being exposed to

922
00:33:39,484 --> 00:33:40,684
it to see that, oh, wait. Now I'm

923
00:33:40,684 --> 00:33:43,244
kinda curious or wait. I'm seeing you be

924
00:33:43,244 --> 00:33:46,009
more confident, be happier. I wanna, you know,

925
00:33:46,009 --> 00:33:47,529
I'm a supportive partner and I wanna be

926
00:33:47,529 --> 00:33:49,609
a part of that. But that's a long

927
00:33:49,609 --> 00:33:51,389
term thing, especially

928
00:33:51,769 --> 00:33:53,929
if you don't know how they feel about

929
00:33:53,929 --> 00:33:56,250
kink. Mhmm. Or if you know that they

930
00:33:56,250 --> 00:33:58,490
don't want it for themselves, but you're fortunate

931
00:33:58,490 --> 00:33:59,869
enough that they're supportive

932
00:34:00,250 --> 00:34:02,315
of you wanting it. Yeah.

933
00:34:03,335 --> 00:34:03,835
So

934
00:34:06,454 --> 00:34:08,614
Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So those are the questions

935
00:34:08,614 --> 00:34:10,614
that I was willing for us to answer

936
00:34:10,614 --> 00:34:13,355
from Instagram. Some questions. Nope. Nope. Nope.

937
00:34:14,054 --> 00:34:14,554
Nope.

938
00:34:14,880 --> 00:34:15,380
Nope.

939
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:18,799
So Wow. During the Nope. I'll show up

940
00:34:18,799 --> 00:34:19,699
to you. Nope.

941
00:34:20,319 --> 00:34:22,319
During the webinar in the live stream, podcast

942
00:34:22,319 --> 00:34:23,779
listeners, you're time traveling.

943
00:34:24,559 --> 00:34:26,500
If you would like to ask us anything,

944
00:34:27,039 --> 00:34:28,559
you can do that in the live stream.

945
00:34:28,559 --> 00:34:29,920
What I need you to do is to

946
00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:32,035
please tag us. So as you ask your

947
00:34:32,035 --> 00:34:34,275
question, do at loving BDSM. It lights up

948
00:34:34,275 --> 00:34:35,974
for us. Do not spam

949
00:34:36,755 --> 00:34:38,755
the the live chat. You will get put

950
00:34:38,755 --> 00:34:40,675
in a time out. Mhmm. Also, if your

951
00:34:40,675 --> 00:34:43,349
question is longer than the character limit

952
00:34:43,889 --> 00:34:46,050
of a single message in live chat, it's

953
00:34:46,050 --> 00:34:48,289
it's probably too much for this space. So

954
00:34:48,289 --> 00:34:49,670
if anybody's got questions,

955
00:34:50,369 --> 00:34:51,269
feel free.

956
00:34:53,730 --> 00:34:56,130
Any thoughts, feelings about anything else we've talked

957
00:34:56,130 --> 00:34:57,190
about in general?

958
00:34:57,489 --> 00:34:58,184
Not really.

959
00:34:58,664 --> 00:34:59,164
I,

960
00:35:00,985 --> 00:35:02,045
not in this

961
00:35:02,425 --> 00:35:05,005
forum venue, whatever, but in other spaces.

962
00:35:06,824 --> 00:35:07,805
I could tell

963
00:35:08,425 --> 00:35:10,125
both long term listeners,

964
00:35:10,679 --> 00:35:12,780
watchers, like, subscribers, however you wanna,

965
00:35:13,319 --> 00:35:15,239
put that, but also just people who've been

966
00:35:15,239 --> 00:35:16,940
in kink for a while. Because

967
00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:19,500
one of the more common

968
00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:21,659
complaints is too strong, but,

969
00:35:22,039 --> 00:35:23,534
you know, we'll go with complaints because I

970
00:35:23,534 --> 00:35:25,694
can't think of a better word, is that

971
00:35:25,694 --> 00:35:27,534
we, you and I, get asked the same

972
00:35:27,534 --> 00:35:28,994
questions over and over again.

973
00:35:29,614 --> 00:35:31,234
And so then it starts to feel,

974
00:35:33,295 --> 00:35:33,795
repetitive.

975
00:35:35,375 --> 00:35:37,720
And, you know, you're you're you're right. If

976
00:35:37,720 --> 00:35:40,059
you were experienced or you've been around here,

977
00:35:40,200 --> 00:35:41,660
like, the whole fucking time,

978
00:35:41,960 --> 00:35:44,619
yes, we do get asked a lot of,

979
00:35:45,640 --> 00:35:47,420
questions over and over again because

980
00:35:48,039 --> 00:35:50,664
people are entering the kink world at their

981
00:35:50,664 --> 00:35:52,824
own time and their own pace, and not

982
00:35:52,824 --> 00:35:54,824
everybody will go listen to your back catalog

983
00:35:54,824 --> 00:35:57,164
nor lord, we're on episode 419.

984
00:35:58,105 --> 00:35:59,784
I would never expect a soul to do

985
00:35:59,784 --> 00:36:00,284
that.

986
00:36:03,144 --> 00:36:05,380
But, you know, a lot of the the

987
00:36:05,380 --> 00:36:06,760
things people wanna know

988
00:36:07,300 --> 00:36:07,800
are

989
00:36:08,500 --> 00:36:10,420
fairly common. You know? How do I meet

990
00:36:10,420 --> 00:36:12,099
somebody? How do I plan a scene? How

991
00:36:12,099 --> 00:36:13,940
do I learn about something? God help us.

992
00:36:13,940 --> 00:36:15,219
How do I talk to a partner I

993
00:36:15,219 --> 00:36:17,175
don't know is kinky? Right? And so, yeah,

994
00:36:17,175 --> 00:36:18,555
we're gonna answer those

995
00:36:19,015 --> 00:36:20,315
over and over again. Question,

996
00:36:20,855 --> 00:36:22,614
is there ever a way to ask your

997
00:36:22,614 --> 00:36:24,295
daddy for a collar or to just say

998
00:36:24,295 --> 00:36:26,555
how important it is for a submissive?

999
00:36:27,255 --> 00:36:28,474
Yes. You ask.

1000
00:36:28,775 --> 00:36:31,095
Now the structure of that is gonna be

1001
00:36:31,095 --> 00:36:33,429
dependent upon how y'all communicate. Yeah.

1002
00:36:34,210 --> 00:36:35,510
If you have any previous

1003
00:36:36,289 --> 00:36:39,589
expectations, rules, whatever in place for how,

1004
00:36:40,369 --> 00:36:42,049
you know, you as a sub approach your

1005
00:36:42,049 --> 00:36:44,369
partner, how you ask for things. We are

1006
00:36:44,369 --> 00:36:46,210
very casual. If I did not have a

1007
00:36:46,210 --> 00:36:48,474
collar and I wanted one, I would find

1008
00:36:48,474 --> 00:36:50,635
an appropriate time. It wouldn't be while, you

1009
00:36:50,635 --> 00:36:52,715
know, we were cooking dinner. It would probably

1010
00:36:52,715 --> 00:36:53,914
be at a quiet time when he could

1011
00:36:53,914 --> 00:36:55,695
focus on me. But I would just say,

1012
00:36:56,155 --> 00:36:58,315
hey, daddy. I I really would love a

1013
00:36:58,315 --> 00:37:00,839
collar. Like, do you know anything about them?

1014
00:37:00,839 --> 00:37:02,119
You know, can I tell you what I've

1015
00:37:02,119 --> 00:37:02,619
learned?

1016
00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:05,500
You know, whatever. If you are more structured,

1017
00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:07,880
then you're gonna have to work within the

1018
00:37:07,880 --> 00:37:10,440
structure that you have. But there should be

1019
00:37:10,440 --> 00:37:11,684
nothing wrong with going,

1020
00:37:12,565 --> 00:37:14,244
I've learned about collars, and I think they're

1021
00:37:14,244 --> 00:37:15,285
great. And can I share with you? And

1022
00:37:15,285 --> 00:37:16,885
I would really like one, and then go

1023
00:37:16,885 --> 00:37:19,204
from there. And and, again, the the whole

1024
00:37:19,204 --> 00:37:21,364
thing, the coloring can be as simple or

1025
00:37:21,364 --> 00:37:22,184
as elaborate.

1026
00:37:22,724 --> 00:37:23,224
Mhmm.

1027
00:37:23,684 --> 00:37:25,340
I actually don't even wear my collar all

1028
00:37:25,340 --> 00:37:26,940
the time. I mean, it was never all

1029
00:37:26,940 --> 00:37:28,860
the time. My current iteration of my collar

1030
00:37:28,860 --> 00:37:30,880
I've had for several years now from elegantly

1031
00:37:30,940 --> 00:37:33,660
owned, our friend Taye Shoe, Etsy, elegantly owned,

1032
00:37:33,660 --> 00:37:34,559
beautiful collars.

1033
00:37:35,260 --> 00:37:37,820
I never could wear it at night because

1034
00:37:37,820 --> 00:37:38,719
I have a

1035
00:37:39,835 --> 00:37:41,055
anxiety, claustrophobia,

1036
00:37:41,914 --> 00:37:43,835
sensory thing that if something is touching my

1037
00:37:43,835 --> 00:37:45,594
neck, I cannot sleep. I feel like I'm

1038
00:37:45,594 --> 00:37:46,974
choking even if I'm not.

1039
00:37:47,275 --> 00:37:49,594
But I don't we got out of the

1040
00:37:49,594 --> 00:37:50,094
habit,

1041
00:37:50,635 --> 00:37:52,409
which is something for us to talk about

1042
00:37:52,889 --> 00:37:54,569
in the between us and the future, of

1043
00:37:54,569 --> 00:37:56,650
me actually putting it on every day. It

1044
00:37:56,650 --> 00:37:58,010
doesn't make me wanna call her any less

1045
00:37:58,010 --> 00:38:00,429
important to me. It's just not

1046
00:38:00,889 --> 00:38:03,710
we don't currently have the ritual in place

1047
00:38:04,010 --> 00:38:05,295
to put it on every day.

1048
00:38:06,894 --> 00:38:08,494
Would I be okay if we sat down

1049
00:38:08,494 --> 00:38:10,295
together and went, hey. Can we get back

1050
00:38:10,295 --> 00:38:12,094
that if I was thinking like, I'm thinking

1051
00:38:12,094 --> 00:38:13,714
about it now because you asked about callers.

1052
00:38:13,775 --> 00:38:15,214
If I was thinking about it, I could

1053
00:38:15,214 --> 00:38:16,815
go to him and go, hey. We don't

1054
00:38:16,815 --> 00:38:18,989
do this anymore. What and I I don't

1055
00:38:18,989 --> 00:38:21,070
demand, even though I might be I clearly

1056
00:38:21,070 --> 00:38:22,050
know what I want.

1057
00:38:22,510 --> 00:38:24,670
I'm I'm the type of will be sassy

1058
00:38:24,670 --> 00:38:26,269
about it. I will be direct. I will

1059
00:38:26,269 --> 00:38:29,010
be assertive as we discussed last week.

1060
00:38:29,949 --> 00:38:31,710
But I tend to ask questions. What do

1061
00:38:31,710 --> 00:38:33,844
you think about? You know? I was thinking

1062
00:38:33,844 --> 00:38:35,844
about this. What do you think? That's how

1063
00:38:35,844 --> 00:38:37,844
I approach because I know I can, and

1064
00:38:37,844 --> 00:38:40,484
he's receptive to that. But, yeah, part of,

1065
00:38:42,565 --> 00:38:44,264
part of that is what is your communication

1066
00:38:44,405 --> 00:38:46,679
style? You know? If y'all have never set

1067
00:38:46,679 --> 00:38:49,239
up anything specific about how y'all communicate, then

1068
00:38:49,239 --> 00:38:51,800
to me, until you do, communication is wide

1069
00:38:51,800 --> 00:38:53,179
open. When is the

1070
00:38:53,480 --> 00:38:55,980
a good time? Like, there's also the,

1071
00:38:56,359 --> 00:38:57,800
method of, hey. I would like to talk

1072
00:38:57,800 --> 00:38:59,000
to you about something. When will be a

1073
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:00,195
good time to have your

1074
00:39:00,675 --> 00:39:02,835
attention and your time and attention? Right? Because

1075
00:39:02,835 --> 00:39:04,835
when it's serious stuff or stuff that's meaningful

1076
00:39:04,835 --> 00:39:07,155
to you, you it's not always great to,

1077
00:39:07,155 --> 00:39:09,015
like, slip it in between the,

1078
00:39:09,474 --> 00:39:10,135
you know,

1079
00:39:11,235 --> 00:39:14,755
my boss is a jerk and traffic sucked.

1080
00:39:14,755 --> 00:39:15,929
Right? You know, that

1081
00:39:16,469 --> 00:39:18,650
but, yeah, there's nothing wrong with asking.

1082
00:39:19,590 --> 00:39:20,489
Nothing at all.

1083
00:39:24,309 --> 00:39:25,130
Let's see.

1084
00:39:25,670 --> 00:39:28,025
How would you recommend starting a kinky community

1085
00:39:28,025 --> 00:39:29,625
in a place that doesn't seem to have

1086
00:39:29,625 --> 00:39:30,125
1?

1087
00:39:31,945 --> 00:39:33,885
From the ground up. It's not

1088
00:39:34,505 --> 00:39:35,224
helpful. It's not helpful.

1089
00:39:36,664 --> 00:39:37,885
I I think in

1090
00:39:38,265 --> 00:39:39,005
in starting

1091
00:39:39,449 --> 00:39:40,109
a community,

1092
00:39:41,609 --> 00:39:43,130
one of the first things you need to

1093
00:39:43,130 --> 00:39:45,210
do is to have a place to hold

1094
00:39:45,210 --> 00:39:47,130
the venue. And a place to tell people

1095
00:39:47,130 --> 00:39:48,989
about it? Yeah. Yep.

1096
00:39:49,609 --> 00:39:50,269
You know,

1097
00:39:51,609 --> 00:39:53,849
Yeah. Find finding a venue, you know, in

1098
00:39:53,849 --> 00:39:57,175
some areas, it's it's easy. Mhmm. You know?

1099
00:39:57,954 --> 00:39:58,775
Other areas,

1100
00:40:00,035 --> 00:40:01,335
not so much. Depends.

1101
00:40:01,635 --> 00:40:02,295
You know?

1102
00:40:02,914 --> 00:40:05,554
Now there was the the one month used

1103
00:40:05,554 --> 00:40:07,255
to attend years ago, West Pasco,

1104
00:40:08,409 --> 00:40:09,769
the place it was held at, they knew

1105
00:40:09,769 --> 00:40:11,289
what we were there for and what we

1106
00:40:11,289 --> 00:40:13,230
were doing. They Yeah. Yeah. They

1107
00:40:13,690 --> 00:40:16,250
no qualms about it. And but but they

1108
00:40:16,250 --> 00:40:18,890
then also understood the importance of giving us

1109
00:40:18,890 --> 00:40:21,105
a space that was private or semi private.

1110
00:40:21,105 --> 00:40:22,625
We had a private space in the back

1111
00:40:22,625 --> 00:40:24,085
anyway. Yes. Mhmm.

1112
00:40:25,105 --> 00:40:27,684
So, you know, that that's that's important too.

1113
00:40:28,545 --> 00:40:30,144
You know, is it some place where you

1114
00:40:30,304 --> 00:40:32,625
where it can be semi private or or

1115
00:40:32,625 --> 00:40:33,125
private?

1116
00:40:33,680 --> 00:40:34,820
Because, you know,

1117
00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:36,820
you you don't want to,

1118
00:40:38,880 --> 00:40:39,539
you know

1119
00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:42,000
if if if you're in a munch and

1120
00:40:42,000 --> 00:40:44,480
you're you're talking about kink, you know, you

1121
00:40:44,480 --> 00:40:45,220
don't want

1122
00:40:45,599 --> 00:40:46,420
other people.

1123
00:40:47,414 --> 00:40:50,215
Right. Munches can be held anywhere Right. In

1124
00:40:50,215 --> 00:40:52,535
any space that allows for public gathering, but

1125
00:40:52,535 --> 00:40:54,555
common spaces can be restaurants

1126
00:40:55,175 --> 00:40:57,575
Yeah. Bars. Because that's not my personal favorite,

1127
00:40:57,575 --> 00:40:59,750
but but Coffee shops. Coffee shops,

1128
00:41:01,010 --> 00:41:01,510
cafes.

1129
00:41:02,130 --> 00:41:03,190
Mhmm. Typically,

1130
00:41:03,889 --> 00:41:06,050
stereotypically, I should say, they're held in places

1131
00:41:06,050 --> 00:41:08,130
where people can eat and or drink. Yeah.

1132
00:41:09,010 --> 00:41:11,170
The reason I get cringey about bars is

1133
00:41:11,170 --> 00:41:13,094
because you don't know who can hold their

1134
00:41:13,175 --> 00:41:14,695
alcohol and you don't know what they might

1135
00:41:14,695 --> 00:41:16,295
be screaming in the middle of a bar

1136
00:41:16,295 --> 00:41:18,454
that you didn't necessarily want the attention on

1137
00:41:18,454 --> 00:41:21,114
you or your group. That's that's my personal

1138
00:41:21,734 --> 00:41:23,974
with bars, but they can be held there.

1139
00:41:23,974 --> 00:41:26,349
People do hold them there. Sometimes you get,

1140
00:41:26,410 --> 00:41:29,210
like, less weird looks from a space like

1141
00:41:29,210 --> 00:41:29,789
a bar.

1142
00:41:30,650 --> 00:41:33,309
When you're first starting out, unless you already

1143
00:41:33,369 --> 00:41:35,449
know you have, like, 10 people in your

1144
00:41:35,449 --> 00:41:37,550
life who are like, please, let's get together.

1145
00:41:37,929 --> 00:41:38,670
You don't

1146
00:41:39,224 --> 00:41:39,724
have

1147
00:41:40,345 --> 00:41:41,885
to be in a private space.

1148
00:41:42,505 --> 00:41:44,265
I knew much that got started after we

1149
00:41:44,265 --> 00:41:45,085
moved here,

1150
00:41:45,704 --> 00:41:47,945
started out with 2 tables pushed together in

1151
00:41:47,945 --> 00:41:50,744
a restaurant. We the time was set for

1152
00:41:50,744 --> 00:41:53,340
when that restaurant was less busy. K?

1153
00:41:53,980 --> 00:41:55,820
And then everybody understood we were literally sitting

1154
00:41:55,820 --> 00:41:57,019
in the middle of a restaurant, but the

1155
00:41:57,019 --> 00:41:58,700
rules kind of on the munch were like,

1156
00:41:58,700 --> 00:42:00,219
hey. We're at a restaurant. It's not a

1157
00:42:00,219 --> 00:42:03,760
private space. Act accordingly. This is vanilla friendly

1158
00:42:04,059 --> 00:42:05,039
location. Mhmm.

1159
00:42:05,795 --> 00:42:08,275
Once you establish a group or you outgrow

1160
00:42:08,275 --> 00:42:09,015
that space,

1161
00:42:09,394 --> 00:42:11,635
then it's time to start looking for places

1162
00:42:11,635 --> 00:42:14,135
where you have private or semi private space.

1163
00:42:15,075 --> 00:42:15,315
Some

1164
00:42:16,195 --> 00:42:19,094
whether you tell them you're kinky or not

1165
00:42:19,474 --> 00:42:21,569
depends on you, your community,

1166
00:42:22,030 --> 00:42:23,309
how well you know you know, if you

1167
00:42:23,309 --> 00:42:24,929
know the people you're talking to, whatever.

1168
00:42:27,069 --> 00:42:27,809
But venues

1169
00:42:28,349 --> 00:42:29,329
love to know

1170
00:42:29,630 --> 00:42:31,869
that they can expect once a month, once

1171
00:42:31,869 --> 00:42:33,089
a week, once or whatever,

1172
00:42:33,434 --> 00:42:36,035
a group of 20, 30, 40, 50 people

1173
00:42:36,315 --> 00:42:39,135
Mhmm. Many of whom will probably buy something.

1174
00:42:39,195 --> 00:42:39,695
Right?

1175
00:42:40,155 --> 00:42:41,914
That can be the sell once it gets

1176
00:42:41,914 --> 00:42:44,175
a little bit bigger if you're gonna be

1177
00:42:44,315 --> 00:42:46,230
in, like, a restaurant or a cafe or

1178
00:42:46,230 --> 00:42:46,730
whatever.

1179
00:42:48,150 --> 00:42:48,650
Now

1180
00:42:48,949 --> 00:42:51,030
picking your place is, like, half of it.

1181
00:42:51,030 --> 00:42:53,590
You gotta tell people that you gotta munch.

1182
00:42:53,590 --> 00:42:54,090
Mhmm.

1183
00:42:54,550 --> 00:42:55,369
The easiest

1184
00:42:55,750 --> 00:42:56,250
and

1185
00:42:56,789 --> 00:42:58,570
I don't know. Is it the best? Maybe.

1186
00:42:58,789 --> 00:43:01,244
The easiest is fat life. Yeah. Because you

1187
00:43:01,244 --> 00:43:03,404
can create an event. You can create a

1188
00:43:03,404 --> 00:43:04,545
community. You can

1189
00:43:05,005 --> 00:43:06,385
kinda tag the geographic

1190
00:43:06,764 --> 00:43:07,264
location

1191
00:43:07,804 --> 00:43:09,565
so people who were searching for events in

1192
00:43:09,565 --> 00:43:11,744
that area can hopefully find it.

1193
00:43:12,125 --> 00:43:13,964
But you gotta let people know that there's

1194
00:43:13,964 --> 00:43:15,025
a munch. Right?

1195
00:43:15,324 --> 00:43:17,329
But then you also have to expect that

1196
00:43:17,329 --> 00:43:19,250
unless you already have a bunch of people

1197
00:43:19,250 --> 00:43:20,530
who've been talking to you about this and

1198
00:43:20,530 --> 00:43:22,309
are like, yeah. We're down for it.

1199
00:43:22,849 --> 00:43:24,449
Your first several months, you might have 1

1200
00:43:24,449 --> 00:43:26,210
or 2 people that show up. You know?

1201
00:43:26,210 --> 00:43:28,070
It can take a while in some places

1202
00:43:28,130 --> 00:43:29,349
to grow that.

1203
00:43:29,864 --> 00:43:31,304
We had a recent q and a from

1204
00:43:31,304 --> 00:43:32,824
somebody who was like, I have been working

1205
00:43:32,824 --> 00:43:34,505
on this for months and I get, you

1206
00:43:34,505 --> 00:43:36,364
know, maybe one person comes.

1207
00:43:36,905 --> 00:43:38,505
And that's kind of the nature of it

1208
00:43:38,505 --> 00:43:39,164
as well.

1209
00:43:40,264 --> 00:43:40,764
So

1210
00:43:43,864 --> 00:43:45,360
anything else you would add to that?

1211
00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:46,340
Okay.

1212
00:43:46,640 --> 00:43:49,140
I see our name. Let me know.

1213
00:43:50,800 --> 00:43:51,700
Let's see.

1214
00:43:53,760 --> 00:43:56,019
Newbie question. How do I behave myself

1215
00:43:56,640 --> 00:43:58,640
if I run into an ex at a

1216
00:43:58,640 --> 00:43:59,140
munch?

1217
00:44:00,574 --> 00:44:02,094
I'm not I'm not that's not

1218
00:44:03,694 --> 00:44:04,494
It depends

1219
00:44:04,974 --> 00:44:06,434
Mhmm. On how

1220
00:44:06,734 --> 00:44:09,135
they became your ex. Yeah. If it was

1221
00:44:09,135 --> 00:44:09,635
contentious,

1222
00:44:10,335 --> 00:44:13,214
if it was traumatic for anybody, if it

1223
00:44:13,214 --> 00:44:13,714
was

1224
00:44:14,769 --> 00:44:16,630
anything less than amicable

1225
00:44:17,089 --> 00:44:17,589
and,

1226
00:44:18,130 --> 00:44:18,630
mature,

1227
00:44:20,529 --> 00:44:22,529
you have to decide if you feel comfortable

1228
00:44:22,529 --> 00:44:24,469
staying in that space or if you

1229
00:44:26,369 --> 00:44:28,130
I hate this because it is usually the

1230
00:44:28,130 --> 00:44:30,764
mature human being who knows how to act

1231
00:44:30,764 --> 00:44:32,525
in public, who has to be the one

1232
00:44:32,525 --> 00:44:33,264
to decide,

1233
00:44:34,204 --> 00:44:35,744
maybe I should remove myself

1234
00:44:36,364 --> 00:44:38,364
because this isn't gonna this is not gonna

1235
00:44:38,364 --> 00:44:40,444
end well. Right? But also, if you don't

1236
00:44:40,444 --> 00:44:42,464
feel safe, you may need to remove yourself.

1237
00:44:42,925 --> 00:44:44,844
If we're talking about it's just gonna be

1238
00:44:44,844 --> 00:44:45,239
awkward,

1239
00:44:48,199 --> 00:44:50,679
everybody handles it differently. But this question is

1240
00:44:50,679 --> 00:44:52,119
sometimes asked of what if I see my

1241
00:44:52,119 --> 00:44:52,619
coworker?

1242
00:44:53,559 --> 00:44:55,900
Some people prefer to pretend they

1243
00:44:56,360 --> 00:44:59,000
don't know you, didn't see you stay on

1244
00:44:59,000 --> 00:45:00,539
opposite sides of the room,

1245
00:45:01,925 --> 00:45:03,465
and there's nothing wrong with that.

1246
00:45:04,405 --> 00:45:04,905
Some

1247
00:45:05,284 --> 00:45:06,985
are willing to go, hey,

1248
00:45:07,364 --> 00:45:09,844
haven't seen you in a while. How are

1249
00:45:09,844 --> 00:45:11,224
you? And see what happens.

1250
00:45:12,324 --> 00:45:14,085
But I think it does come down to

1251
00:45:14,085 --> 00:45:15,989
the nature of how how did that how

1252
00:45:15,989 --> 00:45:17,769
did they become your ex. Right?

1253
00:45:18,309 --> 00:45:21,110
If it's if it was calm, cool, collected,

1254
00:45:21,110 --> 00:45:23,610
maybe, you know, hurt feelings, of course,

1255
00:45:24,150 --> 00:45:25,510
then I don't think you have to do

1256
00:45:25,510 --> 00:45:28,409
anything No. Really. But if it was contentious,

1257
00:45:29,474 --> 00:45:32,135
if there's still some, like, really negative

1258
00:45:32,994 --> 00:45:35,255
feelings or reactions to one another,

1259
00:45:36,755 --> 00:45:37,335
you know,

1260
00:45:38,595 --> 00:45:40,934
it it depends. It really does.

1261
00:45:41,315 --> 00:45:43,655
But if your safety is ever a question,

1262
00:45:44,699 --> 00:45:45,440
your comfort,

1263
00:45:46,139 --> 00:45:48,380
I I hate that this is true, but

1264
00:45:48,380 --> 00:45:49,340
you may need to be the one to

1265
00:45:49,340 --> 00:45:51,579
remove yourself because you can't make them do

1266
00:45:51,579 --> 00:45:52,559
shit. You know?

1267
00:45:53,260 --> 00:45:53,659
But

1268
00:45:54,460 --> 00:45:55,280
True. True.

1269
00:45:55,900 --> 00:45:59,454
Mhmm. Yep. Yep. You don't have to claim

1270
00:45:59,454 --> 00:46:00,815
your ex. You know, you don't have to

1271
00:46:00,894 --> 00:46:02,175
if you see somebody you know in any

1272
00:46:02,175 --> 00:46:03,695
munch, if you see somebody you know and

1273
00:46:03,695 --> 00:46:05,054
you did not know they were kinky and

1274
00:46:05,054 --> 00:46:06,594
they did not know you were kinky,

1275
00:46:06,974 --> 00:46:09,054
you can absolutely act like you didn't see

1276
00:46:09,054 --> 00:46:09,795
them. Right?

1277
00:46:11,890 --> 00:46:13,730
But and you don't have to tell anybody

1278
00:46:13,730 --> 00:46:16,869
you you dated them, fucked them, whatever them,

1279
00:46:17,170 --> 00:46:19,170
if you don't want to. But how are

1280
00:46:19,170 --> 00:46:20,949
they going to behave is really

1281
00:46:21,250 --> 00:46:21,989
the question.

1282
00:46:23,405 --> 00:46:25,324
And that will determine everything else that comes

1283
00:46:25,324 --> 00:46:27,505
after, I guess. Mhmm. Mhmm.

1284
00:46:28,605 --> 00:46:29,105
Okay.

1285
00:46:34,925 --> 00:46:35,425
So

1286
00:46:39,869 --> 00:46:41,869
that's all the questions we've had so far.

1287
00:46:41,869 --> 00:46:43,730
We have a few more minutes. If anybody

1288
00:46:44,269 --> 00:46:45,250
wants to,

1289
00:46:45,949 --> 00:46:48,030
in the livestream, wants to, ask a question,

1290
00:46:48,030 --> 00:46:50,030
please tag us. Please tag us. It does

1291
00:46:50,030 --> 00:46:50,894
light up, and we

1292
00:46:52,894 --> 00:46:55,054
really do see it. Yep.

1293
00:46:55,454 --> 00:46:58,494
Yeah. I I think in some ways, in

1294
00:46:58,494 --> 00:46:59,635
some circumstances,

1295
00:47:00,974 --> 00:47:02,355
we as kingsters

1296
00:47:03,389 --> 00:47:03,889
overcomplicate

1297
00:47:04,269 --> 00:47:07,010
some situations. We think that they are inherently

1298
00:47:07,069 --> 00:47:07,569
more

1299
00:47:07,949 --> 00:47:10,589
complex because it's kink, and a lot of

1300
00:47:10,589 --> 00:47:12,589
times it's just a human thing. Rara was

1301
00:47:12,589 --> 00:47:14,429
talking about with the munch. Well, if you

1302
00:47:14,429 --> 00:47:16,289
plan a munch and you host a munch,

1303
00:47:16,349 --> 00:47:19,015
your work has only begun because at the

1304
00:47:19,015 --> 00:47:21,094
munch, now you gotta work. Right? You gotta

1305
00:47:21,094 --> 00:47:23,175
talk to people, and you gotta be helpful

1306
00:47:23,175 --> 00:47:25,175
and social. However, if you know that's not

1307
00:47:25,175 --> 00:47:27,094
your skill, can you partner up with somebody?

1308
00:47:27,094 --> 00:47:29,355
Right. I was gonna say, I I know

1309
00:47:29,574 --> 00:47:31,199
the 1 munch here, there are a couple

1310
00:47:31,199 --> 00:47:33,460
people. The one person does all the admin,

1311
00:47:33,760 --> 00:47:36,079
you know, the posting and and, you know,

1312
00:47:36,079 --> 00:47:39,059
time and setting up the the location and

1313
00:47:40,320 --> 00:47:41,760
someone else who is a

1314
00:47:43,005 --> 00:47:44,545
sexual butterfly social butterflies.

1315
00:47:44,924 --> 00:47:45,744
Oh, yeah.

1316
00:47:46,125 --> 00:47:48,764
They they are in charge of, you know,

1317
00:47:48,764 --> 00:47:51,565
greeting people and, you know, making new people

1318
00:47:51,565 --> 00:47:54,364
feel welcome. They're the one person welcoming committee.

1319
00:47:54,364 --> 00:47:57,059
Yeah. They they clock a new person really

1320
00:47:57,059 --> 00:47:58,980
quickly Mhmm. And then talk to them and

1321
00:47:58,980 --> 00:48:00,180
get to know them and help them feel

1322
00:48:00,180 --> 00:48:01,719
welcome. And then if they

1323
00:48:02,420 --> 00:48:04,099
kinda figure out a little bit of their

1324
00:48:04,099 --> 00:48:05,940
interest or kinda what they're into, if if

1325
00:48:05,940 --> 00:48:08,500
that's a conversation that occurs, that person is

1326
00:48:08,500 --> 00:48:10,099
really good. I could never do this. They're

1327
00:48:10,099 --> 00:48:11,940
so good at this. They know enough people.

1328
00:48:11,940 --> 00:48:12,735
They're like, oh,

1329
00:48:13,215 --> 00:48:14,815
I want you to meet so and so,

1330
00:48:14,815 --> 00:48:17,215
and then they make the introductions between new

1331
00:48:17,215 --> 00:48:20,414
person and established people Yep. And get them

1332
00:48:20,414 --> 00:48:22,035
to talk to one another. Now

1333
00:48:22,414 --> 00:48:22,914
they

1334
00:48:23,375 --> 00:48:25,394
understand who they're talking to,

1335
00:48:25,775 --> 00:48:28,309
so they or about, so they will sometimes

1336
00:48:28,369 --> 00:48:30,210
know that that person's not open to that,

1337
00:48:30,210 --> 00:48:32,450
or they'll know, let me go check and

1338
00:48:32,450 --> 00:48:35,969
ask, but they do the work of partnering

1339
00:48:35,969 --> 00:48:38,450
and pairing people up so the new person

1340
00:48:38,450 --> 00:48:41,264
tends to have somebody to talk to beyond

1341
00:48:41,264 --> 00:48:43,824
just our our social butterfly. Mhmm. I I

1342
00:48:43,824 --> 00:48:45,824
love watching it. It's like it's amazing to

1343
00:48:45,824 --> 00:48:47,585
watch. You couldn't pay me enough to do

1344
00:48:47,585 --> 00:48:48,945
it. The thing the thing But it's fun

1345
00:48:48,945 --> 00:48:50,724
to watch. The thing that amazes me

1346
00:48:51,505 --> 00:48:52,644
with her is

1347
00:48:53,130 --> 00:48:55,549
there can be 30, 40 people there,

1348
00:48:56,650 --> 00:48:58,650
and she will know everybody's name. She's so

1349
00:48:58,650 --> 00:48:59,150
good.

1350
00:48:59,449 --> 00:49:00,809
Look. You don't have to be that way,

1351
00:49:00,809 --> 00:49:02,889
and you don't have to know somebody who's

1352
00:49:02,889 --> 00:49:05,529
that way. But because especially if it's new,

1353
00:49:05,529 --> 00:49:07,210
you've never done this before. You're gonna learn

1354
00:49:07,210 --> 00:49:09,224
as go. But that's the kind of thing

1355
00:49:09,224 --> 00:49:11,304
you need to be working towards and looking

1356
00:49:11,304 --> 00:49:12,344
for and who can help you with that

1357
00:49:12,344 --> 00:49:13,385
and who's willing to help you with that

1358
00:49:13,385 --> 00:49:15,464
if that's not you. Like, if we ever

1359
00:49:15,464 --> 00:49:18,025
did something like that, I'm gonna plan it.

1360
00:49:18,025 --> 00:49:20,125
It's gonna I'm I'm gonna coordinate.

1361
00:49:21,210 --> 00:49:22,730
And then I'm gonna be like, hey, JB.

1362
00:49:22,730 --> 00:49:24,170
You go have fun. I'm a sit over

1363
00:49:24,170 --> 00:49:26,409
here at the corner. Bring anybody who needs

1364
00:49:26,409 --> 00:49:27,469
to talk to me. Toomey,

1365
00:49:27,929 --> 00:49:29,309
go be our social guy.

1366
00:49:29,929 --> 00:49:32,590
That's Yep. That's how we're structured. Okay.

1367
00:49:33,130 --> 00:49:33,949
Next question.

1368
00:49:34,250 --> 00:49:36,644
What are our favorite episodes of the the

1369
00:49:36,644 --> 00:49:37,784
podcast that we've done?

1370
00:49:39,364 --> 00:49:41,284
I can hardly remember all the topics. I

1371
00:49:41,284 --> 00:49:43,364
know. I know. You know, it was 400

1372
00:49:43,364 --> 00:49:44,025
and some

1373
00:49:44,965 --> 00:49:46,664
plus all the other many

1374
00:49:47,125 --> 00:49:49,230
stuff we've done on the side. It it's

1375
00:49:49,309 --> 00:49:51,650
hard to say. I I don't really know.

1376
00:49:52,030 --> 00:49:53,650
I I can't think of specific

1377
00:49:55,230 --> 00:49:57,070
back up. I can't think of all the

1378
00:49:57,070 --> 00:49:59,150
times this has occurred. It's top of mind

1379
00:49:59,150 --> 00:50:00,769
because it occurred last week.

1380
00:50:01,150 --> 00:50:04,454
I like talking about, from, in my case,

1381
00:50:04,594 --> 00:50:05,094
submission

1382
00:50:05,394 --> 00:50:06,534
in ways that

1383
00:50:06,914 --> 00:50:09,255
are beyond the here's what a sub is.

1384
00:50:09,394 --> 00:50:11,974
Talking about assertive submissives. Talking about,

1385
00:50:15,155 --> 00:50:16,994
god. We did another thing on on submission.

1386
00:50:16,994 --> 00:50:18,289
And I was like, this

1387
00:50:18,590 --> 00:50:20,750
is this is a a direction of the

1388
00:50:20,750 --> 00:50:23,230
conversation that does not you know, anything that

1389
00:50:23,230 --> 00:50:25,150
breaks down a stereotype of what it means

1390
00:50:25,150 --> 00:50:26,750
to be a submissive, I fucking love talking

1391
00:50:26,750 --> 00:50:27,650
about that because

1392
00:50:28,670 --> 00:50:31,244
there's always at least one person who was

1393
00:50:31,244 --> 00:50:34,045
shocked by the revelation. Either that it's okay

1394
00:50:34,045 --> 00:50:35,744
that they are like that

1395
00:50:36,444 --> 00:50:38,525
or that there are submissives out there they

1396
00:50:38,525 --> 00:50:40,204
might come across who are like that. Like,

1397
00:50:40,204 --> 00:50:41,425
I fucking love that.

1398
00:50:42,204 --> 00:50:44,409
The other favorite episodes of mine are

1399
00:50:45,530 --> 00:50:48,010
is I do not ever plan to go

1400
00:50:48,010 --> 00:50:48,750
on a rant.

1401
00:50:49,050 --> 00:50:50,110
I do not ever

1402
00:50:50,809 --> 00:50:52,590
assume that I will rant.

1403
00:50:52,969 --> 00:50:53,469
But,

1404
00:50:53,929 --> 00:50:54,429
man,

1405
00:50:54,969 --> 00:50:55,630
a good

1406
00:50:56,025 --> 00:50:59,244
rant, that's just that's just cleansing. Like, that's

1407
00:51:00,105 --> 00:51:02,824
I work through some stuff when I go

1408
00:51:02,824 --> 00:51:04,764
home. Yeah. Right? Yep.

1409
00:51:05,944 --> 00:51:06,444
Yep.

1410
00:51:08,904 --> 00:51:11,039
Anything we've talked about where somebody goes, oh

1411
00:51:11,039 --> 00:51:12,079
my god. I thought I was the only

1412
00:51:12,079 --> 00:51:13,920
one. And they realize they're not the only

1413
00:51:13,920 --> 00:51:15,039
one. I I I think to me,

1414
00:51:15,599 --> 00:51:17,119
I I was thinking, you know, while you

1415
00:51:17,119 --> 00:51:19,119
were talking, I was thinking about it. I

1416
00:51:19,119 --> 00:51:20,500
I think for me,

1417
00:51:20,800 --> 00:51:23,760
a a favorite episode is when somebody reaches

1418
00:51:23,760 --> 00:51:25,905
out and says, you know, what you talked

1419
00:51:25,905 --> 00:51:27,605
about, what you were saying, it helped.

1420
00:51:27,985 --> 00:51:30,305
Yes. Oh, my god. I mean, that that

1421
00:51:30,305 --> 00:51:33,265
that's a wonderful thing. And, you know, to

1422
00:51:33,265 --> 00:51:35,125
to say have any one specific

1423
00:51:35,664 --> 00:51:37,985
episode, no, I really don't. But, you know,

1424
00:51:37,985 --> 00:51:40,465
when when people reach out about an episode

1425
00:51:40,465 --> 00:51:42,140
and it it helped them, it spoke to

1426
00:51:42,140 --> 00:51:44,400
them in some way, you know, that's

1427
00:51:45,019 --> 00:51:45,820
Yeah. It's,

1428
00:51:47,180 --> 00:51:47,680
419

1429
00:51:48,059 --> 00:51:48,559
episodes,

1430
00:51:48,860 --> 00:51:49,760
all the minis.

1431
00:51:50,059 --> 00:51:50,559
Mhmm.

1432
00:51:52,059 --> 00:51:53,500
And then anything we just did a video

1433
00:51:53,500 --> 00:51:55,324
about that we didn't do a podcast about,

1434
00:51:55,465 --> 00:51:55,965
it

1435
00:51:57,224 --> 00:51:59,144
it comes into your brain. You give it

1436
00:51:59,144 --> 00:52:00,744
the focus and concentration you can while you're

1437
00:52:00,744 --> 00:52:01,704
talking about it, and then you have to

1438
00:52:01,704 --> 00:52:03,465
let it go because I don't have enough

1439
00:52:03,465 --> 00:52:05,385
filing cabinets in my brain to hold that.

1440
00:52:05,385 --> 00:52:06,824
But what that means is I'll think I

1441
00:52:06,824 --> 00:52:08,869
have come up with an excellent idea. How

1442
00:52:08,869 --> 00:52:10,070
can we not talk about it? And then

1443
00:52:10,070 --> 00:52:11,510
I'll go to the archives. I'm like, oh,

1444
00:52:11,510 --> 00:52:13,610
we we have already talked about this

1445
00:52:13,910 --> 00:52:14,730
3 times.

1446
00:52:15,269 --> 00:52:16,410
Here's all the instances.

1447
00:52:16,789 --> 00:52:18,170
There's a downside to that.

1448
00:52:19,510 --> 00:52:22,625
JB, do you have any methods for resetting

1449
00:52:22,765 --> 00:52:24,625
yourself after being overwhelmed

1450
00:52:25,005 --> 00:52:27,425
from making all the choices in your dynamic?

1451
00:52:30,765 --> 00:52:31,265
No.

1452
00:52:31,885 --> 00:52:33,585
Wouldn't it be helpful if you did?

1453
00:52:33,885 --> 00:52:36,289
Well, you know, it it's it's funny you

1454
00:52:36,289 --> 00:52:37,190
you bring question

1455
00:52:37,489 --> 00:52:38,550
like that up.

1456
00:52:39,409 --> 00:52:40,469
I I have been

1457
00:52:41,489 --> 00:52:43,190
in in a in a space,

1458
00:52:44,369 --> 00:52:46,230
lately, probably about the last month,

1459
00:52:47,650 --> 00:52:48,150
easily,

1460
00:52:49,329 --> 00:52:50,469
where I realized

1461
00:52:50,875 --> 00:52:53,355
something about myself. And and, oddly enough, it

1462
00:52:53,355 --> 00:52:55,675
was from watching Fear the Walking Dead. Oh,

1463
00:52:55,675 --> 00:52:56,175
gee.

1464
00:52:56,715 --> 00:52:58,815
Inspiration can strike anywhere. Right.

1465
00:53:00,155 --> 00:53:00,894
I'm stuck.

1466
00:53:01,515 --> 00:53:02,015
Mhmm.

1467
00:53:02,715 --> 00:53:05,269
Mhmm. I'm I'm I'm I am stuck. With

1468
00:53:05,269 --> 00:53:07,269
with everything that has happened over the last

1469
00:53:07,269 --> 00:53:09,590
few years and and all the stress, I

1470
00:53:09,590 --> 00:53:11,989
am in a position I am stuck. And

1471
00:53:11,989 --> 00:53:13,989
in all honesty, I don't know how to

1472
00:53:13,989 --> 00:53:15,769
get the hell out of it.

1473
00:53:16,630 --> 00:53:17,510
So that is,

1474
00:53:18,070 --> 00:53:20,684
a goal coming up for me to work

1475
00:53:20,684 --> 00:53:21,424
through that.

1476
00:53:22,764 --> 00:53:23,744
You saying goal

1477
00:53:24,045 --> 00:53:25,565
makes me want to say, oh, by the

1478
00:53:25,565 --> 00:53:26,065
way,

1479
00:53:26,605 --> 00:53:28,204
I think one of our final episodes of

1480
00:53:28,204 --> 00:53:30,944
2024, we'll talk about our goals for 2025.

1481
00:53:31,085 --> 00:53:31,585
Yeah.

1482
00:53:33,565 --> 00:53:34,625
Yeah. I

1483
00:53:35,329 --> 00:53:37,570
I would agree with your assessment based on

1484
00:53:37,570 --> 00:53:39,989
what I have seen Mhmm. And experienced.

1485
00:53:40,530 --> 00:53:41,269
I don't

1486
00:53:41,570 --> 00:53:43,170
know if I would use that word about

1487
00:53:43,170 --> 00:53:43,670
myself,

1488
00:53:44,530 --> 00:53:47,110
but I think I'm in the same vibe.

1489
00:53:48,144 --> 00:53:49,125
I'm more

1490
00:53:50,385 --> 00:53:51,444
in a rut

1491
00:53:51,984 --> 00:53:53,744
because I have things to do. Like, if

1492
00:53:53,744 --> 00:53:56,164
they're set and established, I just do them.

1493
00:53:56,625 --> 00:53:58,005
You have to be the one,

1494
00:53:58,304 --> 00:53:58,804
like,

1495
00:53:59,184 --> 00:54:00,545
at the drop kind of the drop of

1496
00:54:00,545 --> 00:54:03,299
a hat to decide a thing, to come

1497
00:54:03,299 --> 00:54:04,839
up with a thing, to

1498
00:54:05,299 --> 00:54:05,799
whatever.

1499
00:54:07,539 --> 00:54:08,359
So, yeah,

1500
00:54:09,299 --> 00:54:11,460
maybe that will be a future topic. Mhmm.

1501
00:54:11,460 --> 00:54:13,404
Not anytime soon. He's gotta work through this.

1502
00:54:13,404 --> 00:54:13,904
Right.

1503
00:54:14,844 --> 00:54:16,545
Let me get to the other side first.

1504
00:54:17,085 --> 00:54:19,724
Yeah. So there there it is. Unfortunately, no.

1505
00:54:19,724 --> 00:54:20,944
I don't have an answer

1506
00:54:21,244 --> 00:54:22,125
for you on that.

1507
00:54:22,844 --> 00:54:25,085
It it's it's something I need to work

1508
00:54:25,085 --> 00:54:25,824
through myself.

1509
00:54:26,889 --> 00:54:29,550
I think the question is certainly worth

1510
00:54:30,250 --> 00:54:32,250
anybody who finds themselves in a dominant role,

1511
00:54:32,250 --> 00:54:34,489
whether you're a switch or Mhmm. You're a

1512
00:54:34,489 --> 00:54:37,530
dom, of asking yourself, do you have that?

1513
00:54:37,530 --> 00:54:39,849
Do you can you imagine how you would

1514
00:54:39,849 --> 00:54:40,510
do that?

1515
00:54:43,985 --> 00:54:45,045
Yeah. I keep

1516
00:54:45,505 --> 00:54:47,585
personally and this is just in life and

1517
00:54:47,585 --> 00:54:49,265
as a submissive, and it is different from

1518
00:54:49,265 --> 00:54:51,744
being a dominant. I keep telling myself the

1519
00:54:51,744 --> 00:54:52,244
lie.

1520
00:54:52,704 --> 00:54:55,409
When things calm down, I can focus on

1521
00:54:55,409 --> 00:54:56,389
that, and

1522
00:54:56,769 --> 00:54:58,929
it never comes. Happens, does it? It's life.

1523
00:54:58,929 --> 00:55:00,210
It's life. Right. It

1524
00:55:01,089 --> 00:55:03,329
if it calms down, I don't even trust

1525
00:55:03,329 --> 00:55:05,089
if it calms down. Yeah. That's too calm.

1526
00:55:05,089 --> 00:55:06,789
Right? I'll make up something

1527
00:55:07,329 --> 00:55:09,409
to happen to make it crazy again. Mhmm.

1528
00:55:09,409 --> 00:55:11,154
And I think that's that's the thing that

1529
00:55:11,714 --> 00:55:12,454
I know

1530
00:55:12,835 --> 00:55:13,954
it it does it to me. I think

1531
00:55:13,954 --> 00:55:15,154
it does it to you, and I'm sure

1532
00:55:15,154 --> 00:55:17,394
this is fairly common where we go, oh,

1533
00:55:17,394 --> 00:55:18,054
I can't

1534
00:55:18,434 --> 00:55:20,295
there's no time for that right now,

1535
00:55:20,755 --> 00:55:21,894
and there's never

1536
00:55:22,914 --> 00:55:24,054
time. Like, you

1537
00:55:25,315 --> 00:55:26,534
I know for me,

1538
00:55:27,210 --> 00:55:28,570
my brain lies to me and goes, you

1539
00:55:28,570 --> 00:55:29,869
know, if you cannot devote

1540
00:55:30,409 --> 00:55:32,269
8 solid hours to this,

1541
00:55:32,730 --> 00:55:34,109
what are you even doing?

1542
00:55:34,570 --> 00:55:36,969
Instead of the truth, which is even if

1543
00:55:36,969 --> 00:55:38,650
I can only give something 5 minutes a

1544
00:55:38,650 --> 00:55:39,150
day,

1545
00:55:39,614 --> 00:55:40,514
that's progress.

1546
00:55:40,974 --> 00:55:43,534
That's time spent. And that 5 minutes can

1547
00:55:43,534 --> 00:55:45,454
maybe grow to 10, can grow to an

1548
00:55:45,454 --> 00:55:47,375
hour, could you know what I mean? Mhmm.

1549
00:55:47,375 --> 00:55:49,954
But yeah. Yep. Mhmm. Mhmm.

1550
00:55:52,414 --> 00:55:53,074
I think

1551
00:55:56,010 --> 00:55:57,630
that, I think, will wrap up with

1552
00:55:58,410 --> 00:56:01,070
the those will be our last questions. Mhmm.

1553
00:56:01,530 --> 00:56:03,530
Because it's like a few minutes until the

1554
00:56:03,530 --> 00:56:05,890
end of the hour, and bonus sections Yeah.

1555
00:56:06,090 --> 00:56:08,505
Are a thing. Is a thing. So thank

1556
00:56:08,505 --> 00:56:10,984
y'all, whether on Instagram or here on YouTube

1557
00:56:10,984 --> 00:56:12,505
for the live chat. Thank you for your

1558
00:56:12,505 --> 00:56:13,005
questions.

1559
00:56:15,065 --> 00:56:16,585
We do if you were like, I had

1560
00:56:16,585 --> 00:56:18,264
a question and you did not answer it,

1561
00:56:18,264 --> 00:56:20,045
or I have a really complex question,

1562
00:56:20,344 --> 00:56:22,930
please use our contact link on our website.

1563
00:56:22,930 --> 00:56:24,150
I think for

1564
00:56:24,769 --> 00:56:26,930
I know for, podcast folks, it's in the

1565
00:56:26,930 --> 00:56:28,369
show notes. I think for YouTube folks, it's

1566
00:56:28,369 --> 00:56:29,510
down in the description box.

1567
00:56:30,130 --> 00:56:32,050
You can, like, type out the whole damn

1568
00:56:32,050 --> 00:56:32,550
story.

1569
00:56:32,930 --> 00:56:34,930
Send us the question. We do q and

1570
00:56:34,930 --> 00:56:37,494
a episodes every Monday, nearly every Monday, I

1571
00:56:37,494 --> 00:56:39,615
should say. Mhmm. Where we just take one

1572
00:56:39,615 --> 00:56:41,615
question and give it as much time as

1573
00:56:41,615 --> 00:56:42,275
it needs.

1574
00:56:43,375 --> 00:56:43,855
So,

1575
00:56:44,494 --> 00:56:45,635
that is always available.

1576
00:56:47,695 --> 00:56:49,315
Baby got a bubble? Yeah.

1577
00:56:49,855 --> 00:56:50,355
Man.

1578
00:56:51,369 --> 00:56:51,869
So

1579
00:56:52,650 --> 00:56:55,130
k. Yeah. So, yeah, I guess we're going

1580
00:56:55,130 --> 00:56:56,730
to the bonus section now. So are we

1581
00:56:56,730 --> 00:56:57,949
good? I don't know.

1582
00:56:59,609 --> 00:57:01,369
Keep it kinky, y'all. And we'll see you

1583
00:57:01,369 --> 00:57:02,109
next week.

1584
00:57:10,815 --> 00:57:11,315
Dottie.

1585
00:57:11,615 --> 00:57:14,494
Yes, baby girl. 1, why can't I remember

1586
00:57:14,494 --> 00:57:16,015
how to say the things I've been saying

1587
00:57:16,015 --> 00:57:16,835
since 2015?

1588
00:57:17,375 --> 00:57:17,875
2,

1589
00:57:18,255 --> 00:57:19,855
can we talk to the crickets? Yes. We

1590
00:57:19,855 --> 00:57:20,789
can. Okay. Thank you.

1591
00:57:21,750 --> 00:57:22,489
Okay. Thank

1592
00:57:26,390 --> 00:57:28,309
you. Yeah. DS Bunny and I I think

1593
00:57:28,309 --> 00:57:29,750
a couple other people, but I saw DS

1594
00:57:29,750 --> 00:57:31,030
Bunny do it in live chat. It was

1595
00:57:31,030 --> 00:57:33,349
like, oh, this top remember this topic you

1596
00:57:33,349 --> 00:57:35,164
did? That might be great for this question.

1597
00:57:35,465 --> 00:57:35,965
I

1598
00:57:36,265 --> 00:57:38,204
need I I I need that.

1599
00:57:38,585 --> 00:57:39,405
I need somebody

1600
00:57:40,025 --> 00:57:42,025
who could be like, this thing you're you've

1601
00:57:42,025 --> 00:57:43,864
already talked about it. I remember the episode.

1602
00:57:43,864 --> 00:57:45,144
You don't have to remember the name the

1603
00:57:45,144 --> 00:57:46,985
number. If you just remember the topic, it

1604
00:57:46,985 --> 00:57:49,239
could remind me that that topic exists. Decision

1605
00:57:49,239 --> 00:57:51,480
fatigue. If we didn't have that episode, I'd

1606
00:57:51,480 --> 00:57:52,679
be like, oh my god. We need that

1607
00:57:52,679 --> 00:57:55,400
episode. I do remember doing decision fatigue. That

1608
00:57:55,400 --> 00:57:57,579
makes me feel better. Yeah.

1609
00:57:58,199 --> 00:58:00,699
I can usually remember the topics we've done

1610
00:58:00,954 --> 00:58:03,034
within, like, the past year. I won't remember

1611
00:58:03,034 --> 00:58:04,474
which ones they were, but I can kinda

1612
00:58:04,474 --> 00:58:05,434
go, yeah. I think we talked about that.

1613
00:58:05,434 --> 00:58:06,795
I think we talked about that. Mhmm.

1614
00:58:07,594 --> 00:58:09,674
Once we get past the, like, the year

1615
00:58:09,674 --> 00:58:10,174
mark,

1616
00:58:11,194 --> 00:58:14,510
nope. Nope. Don't don't remember anymore. Nope.

1617
00:58:16,969 --> 00:58:18,889
So yeah. And I have 2 places I

1618
00:58:18,889 --> 00:58:19,389
look,

1619
00:58:20,010 --> 00:58:21,849
our archives. I have in Google Drive. I

1620
00:58:21,849 --> 00:58:23,530
have all the places where I've done I

1621
00:58:23,530 --> 00:58:26,190
call them scripts. They're not scripts. They're outlines,

1622
00:58:26,250 --> 00:58:26,750
y'all.

1623
00:58:27,050 --> 00:58:30,135
They're barely that. Yeah. So I have those.

1624
00:58:30,135 --> 00:58:31,515
And then, of course, in,

1625
00:58:32,775 --> 00:58:35,574
our website, in the dashboard part where I

1626
00:58:35,574 --> 00:58:37,594
do stuff, where I post the show notes,

1627
00:58:38,135 --> 00:58:39,114
I check there.

1628
00:58:40,135 --> 00:58:42,074
But what I've learned is sometimes

1629
00:58:43,079 --> 00:58:45,500
the word I'm using for a term today

1630
00:58:46,119 --> 00:58:49,000
is not the word I used 5 years

1631
00:58:49,000 --> 00:58:49,500
ago.

1632
00:58:49,960 --> 00:58:50,780
That's fun.

1633
00:58:51,480 --> 00:58:52,380
That's fun.

1634
00:58:54,039 --> 00:58:54,539
So

1635
00:58:56,875 --> 00:58:59,614
Lola's snoring now. Yep. She went out twice

1636
00:58:59,914 --> 00:59:01,355
while we've been just sitting down in front

1637
00:59:01,355 --> 00:59:02,494
of a camera and microphones

1638
00:59:02,954 --> 00:59:05,195
and wore herself out apparently. And and she

1639
00:59:05,195 --> 00:59:05,695
was

1640
00:59:06,635 --> 00:59:09,035
barking at the dog next door, and then

1641
00:59:09,035 --> 00:59:10,929
she was barking at the folks On the

1642
00:59:10,929 --> 00:59:12,610
other side. On the other side next door

1643
00:59:12,769 --> 00:59:14,630
Mhmm. Who were working in the backyard.

1644
00:59:15,010 --> 00:59:15,750
Mhmm. Mhmm.

1645
00:59:18,289 --> 00:59:20,769
Yep. So, you know, she she went out

1646
00:59:20,769 --> 00:59:22,610
there, she let everybody know who's

1647
00:59:23,890 --> 00:59:25,984
Yep. Yep. She was like, hi. I'm here.

1648
00:59:26,125 --> 00:59:29,344
I'm watching all of you. Mhmm. So

1649
00:59:31,164 --> 00:59:31,664
but

1650
00:59:33,884 --> 00:59:34,384
yeah.

1651
00:59:35,565 --> 00:59:37,264
We have a very,

1652
00:59:39,140 --> 00:59:41,059
I don't know. It feels crazy to me

1653
00:59:41,059 --> 00:59:43,539
because I would prefer to just be in

1654
00:59:43,539 --> 00:59:45,780
my soft close sitting on my couch every

1655
00:59:45,780 --> 00:59:47,719
night of the week, every day

1656
00:59:48,180 --> 00:59:49,940
of a week, every week of a year.

1657
00:59:49,940 --> 00:59:52,180
And that's not gonna be tonight. No. We

1658
00:59:52,180 --> 00:59:53,719
will finish up recording.

1659
00:59:54,244 --> 00:59:55,864
We get a little bit of time,

1660
00:59:56,485 --> 00:59:57,605
based on what time it is now. It's

1661
00:59:57,605 --> 01:00:00,344
2 PM our time. Around, what, 3:30

1662
01:00:00,644 --> 01:00:02,804
our time? Maybe a little bit earlier? A

1663
01:00:02,804 --> 01:00:04,485
little We have to be in the car.

1664
01:00:04,485 --> 01:00:06,344
Mhmm. We're all going. Yep.

1665
01:00:07,280 --> 01:00:09,699
The youngest has his social work thing,

1666
01:00:10,159 --> 01:00:12,000
and then we have to get dinner. Mhmm.

1667
01:00:12,000 --> 01:00:14,239
And then the oldest, thankfully in the same

1668
01:00:14,239 --> 01:00:15,940
city, has a concert tonight.

1669
01:00:17,280 --> 01:00:18,500
The only, like,

1670
01:00:18,880 --> 01:00:20,099
woo, yay, maybe,

1671
01:00:20,594 --> 01:00:22,434
is the oldest told me when we saw

1672
01:00:22,434 --> 01:00:23,795
him over the weekend, he was like, I

1673
01:00:23,795 --> 01:00:25,875
might not wanna go out after my concert.

1674
01:00:25,875 --> 01:00:27,155
I might wanna hang out with and he

1675
01:00:27,155 --> 01:00:28,135
was so apologetic.

1676
01:00:28,434 --> 01:00:30,215
I was like, dude, that's okay.

1677
01:00:30,914 --> 01:00:32,275
Do you know how much money you save

1678
01:00:32,275 --> 01:00:34,090
me when you don't wanna go get food

1679
01:00:34,090 --> 01:00:35,150
after a concert?

1680
01:00:38,250 --> 01:00:40,829
Yeah. And he's you know, they have Thanksgiving

1681
01:00:40,889 --> 01:00:42,650
break next week. He's only coming home for

1682
01:00:42,650 --> 01:00:45,150
the day next week, but that's fine.

1683
01:00:47,655 --> 01:00:48,155
But,

1684
01:00:49,094 --> 01:00:50,155
yeah. So we're

1685
01:00:50,934 --> 01:00:51,434
we're

1686
01:00:51,894 --> 01:00:53,894
gonna be out and about, and I'm not,

1687
01:00:54,054 --> 01:00:55,655
the type of person who likes to be

1688
01:00:55,655 --> 01:00:56,715
out or about.

1689
01:00:57,815 --> 01:00:59,675
Not not in real pants.

1690
01:01:00,135 --> 01:01:01,114
Not in a bra.

1691
01:01:05,050 --> 01:01:05,710
But yeah.

1692
01:01:09,690 --> 01:01:10,909
And before we,

1693
01:01:12,809 --> 01:01:14,969
in between stuff today, so you like, we're

1694
01:01:14,969 --> 01:01:16,730
working this morning. I was doing some stuff

1695
01:01:16,730 --> 01:01:19,094
this morning, and we had a a moment

1696
01:01:19,094 --> 01:01:21,414
of calm before we got ready for the

1697
01:01:21,414 --> 01:01:23,275
podcast and recording stuff.

1698
01:01:23,655 --> 01:01:25,275
And we had to map out the next

1699
01:01:25,574 --> 01:01:26,474
5 days

1700
01:01:27,014 --> 01:01:28,315
because for us,

1701
01:01:30,295 --> 01:01:32,155
we'll be lucky if we take Thanksgiving

1702
01:01:32,454 --> 01:01:34,619
Day off, which is next Thursday for anybody

1703
01:01:34,619 --> 01:01:36,159
who's not American and doesn't celebrate

1704
01:01:36,699 --> 01:01:38,859
Thursday, the I think that's 28th, whatever the

1705
01:01:38,859 --> 01:01:39,839
number that is.

1706
01:01:41,500 --> 01:01:44,239
Because we're getting ready for Black Friday. Yeah.

1707
01:01:44,539 --> 01:01:47,154
And normally, it's always kind of a cluster.

1708
01:01:47,154 --> 01:01:48,674
I bet if I went and listened to

1709
01:01:48,674 --> 01:01:50,594
us complain about it every year since they've

1710
01:01:50,594 --> 01:01:52,755
had the kinkery, we, you know, we are

1711
01:01:52,755 --> 01:01:54,454
always feeling overwhelmed.

1712
01:01:54,994 --> 01:01:55,494
But

1713
01:01:55,954 --> 01:01:58,855
this year is the 1st year we

1714
01:01:59,300 --> 01:02:01,859
are only or not only don't feel stocked

1715
01:02:01,859 --> 01:02:02,519
up enough.

1716
01:02:02,820 --> 01:02:04,980
So not stocked up enough, we didn't go

1717
01:02:04,980 --> 01:02:07,219
to Orlando to the woodshed this year because

1718
01:02:07,219 --> 01:02:08,739
there was no way we could stock for

1719
01:02:08,739 --> 01:02:10,340
both. We just didn't. It was not an

1720
01:02:10,340 --> 01:02:10,840
option.

1721
01:02:11,219 --> 01:02:13,065
Nope. And so we've had to map out

1722
01:02:13,065 --> 01:02:15,545
how we're going to get I think by

1723
01:02:15,545 --> 01:02:18,045
the time we're done, you will have, in

1724
01:02:18,264 --> 01:02:20,744
space of, like, 3 days made, like, 50

1725
01:02:20,744 --> 01:02:21,804
or 60 paddles

1726
01:02:22,184 --> 01:02:24,445
Mhmm. On top of other things. Like, I

1727
01:02:24,505 --> 01:02:26,949
I got a candle wax melter so I

1728
01:02:26,949 --> 01:02:30,090
can make more candles. I'm so excited.

1729
01:02:30,789 --> 01:02:32,550
Yep. And if it works like we want

1730
01:02:32,550 --> 01:02:34,329
it to, we will buy a second one.

1731
01:02:35,349 --> 01:02:36,250
I'm so excited.

1732
01:02:36,710 --> 01:02:38,469
Yeah. I've been been doing all that in

1733
01:02:38,469 --> 01:02:39,610
between. Been making,

1734
01:02:41,494 --> 01:02:45,015
families getting homemade Christmas Everybody's getting homemade this

1735
01:02:45,015 --> 01:02:45,675
year. Yep.

1736
01:02:47,094 --> 01:02:49,035
So I've been been working on those.

1737
01:02:50,535 --> 01:02:53,015
Gifts that everybody's getting in between when I

1738
01:02:53,015 --> 01:02:54,855
can. I sit and I've been watching Fear

1739
01:02:54,855 --> 01:02:55,914
the Walking Dead.

1740
01:02:56,329 --> 01:02:58,349
Mhmm. Mhmm. Been liking that. And,

1741
01:03:00,889 --> 01:03:02,269
what else been doing?

1742
01:03:02,889 --> 01:03:03,530
I have,

1743
01:03:04,489 --> 01:03:07,369
purposely pulled myself back on social media a

1744
01:03:07,369 --> 01:03:09,769
lot. Just deleted Twitter off my phone. Why

1745
01:03:09,769 --> 01:03:12,074
I still had it again, I don't know.

1746
01:03:12,094 --> 01:03:14,974
I've not been on in Instagram as much

1747
01:03:14,974 --> 01:03:16,114
other than to, like,

1748
01:03:16,655 --> 01:03:18,974
monitor the craziness on the Kinkering and Loving

1749
01:03:18,974 --> 01:03:19,474
BDSM.

1750
01:03:20,014 --> 01:03:21,695
So what that has meant is do you

1751
01:03:21,695 --> 01:03:23,534
know if you are not doom scrolling on

1752
01:03:23,534 --> 01:03:24,355
social media,

1753
01:03:24,940 --> 01:03:26,460
you have a lot of time for other

1754
01:03:26,460 --> 01:03:28,480
things. And my other thing has been reading,

1755
01:03:28,860 --> 01:03:30,160
like Yeah. A

1756
01:03:30,619 --> 01:03:32,940
a grotesque amount. I was feeling bad. I

1757
01:03:32,940 --> 01:03:34,699
was like, how am I reading so much?

1758
01:03:34,699 --> 01:03:36,320
And then I justified it by, well,

1759
01:03:36,699 --> 01:03:38,914
you would normally have scrolled this many hours.

1760
01:03:39,054 --> 01:03:39,554
Yeah.

1761
01:03:40,094 --> 01:03:40,675
Social media.

1762
01:03:40,974 --> 01:03:42,655
I mean, I I I I have done

1763
01:03:42,655 --> 01:03:44,434
the same thing. I've I've removed

1764
01:03:45,054 --> 01:03:45,795
a lot

1765
01:03:46,815 --> 01:03:48,195
of the social media

1766
01:03:48,494 --> 01:03:50,035
off of my phone. Most,

1767
01:03:50,574 --> 01:03:52,239
just left a couple, like I say, for

1768
01:03:52,239 --> 01:03:53,920
the for the businesses, for the,

1769
01:03:55,119 --> 01:03:57,539
the concrete and the wood dom. Mhmm.

1770
01:03:59,679 --> 01:04:01,279
And and I do not look at my

1771
01:04:01,279 --> 01:04:04,019
phone as much. No. And and I don't,

1772
01:04:05,945 --> 01:04:07,324
you know, intend to.

1773
01:04:08,264 --> 01:04:09,164
Yeah. So,

1774
01:04:09,704 --> 01:04:11,385
you know, I've been doing I've been doing

1775
01:04:11,385 --> 01:04:13,704
other things. I've I've got a 1,000 piece

1776
01:04:13,704 --> 01:04:14,204
puzzle

1777
01:04:14,664 --> 01:04:16,525
that I've been working on. Mhmm.

1778
01:04:16,905 --> 01:04:18,925
You know, I'll I'll take that in,

1779
01:04:19,385 --> 01:04:21,269
you know, take that out some nights and

1780
01:04:21,269 --> 01:04:24,150
work on it. Some nights I'll watch Fear

1781
01:04:24,150 --> 01:04:26,250
the Walking Dead. Some nights we'll watch

1782
01:04:26,710 --> 01:04:29,130
Outlander together. Mhmm. Mhmm.

1783
01:04:29,750 --> 01:04:31,349
What I have found, and I hate it

1784
01:04:31,349 --> 01:04:32,489
because I really enjoy,

1785
01:04:32,949 --> 01:04:33,449
Outlander,

1786
01:04:34,744 --> 01:04:36,364
but something about drama

1787
01:04:36,985 --> 01:04:38,585
shows of any sort, I have to be

1788
01:04:38,585 --> 01:04:39,885
in a very specific

1789
01:04:41,224 --> 01:04:42,905
frame of mind to watch it. Like, I

1790
01:04:42,905 --> 01:04:43,885
have to like,

1791
01:04:44,184 --> 01:04:45,945
the other night, you know, Jimmy's like, I

1792
01:04:45,945 --> 01:04:47,625
wanna watch TV. And I'm like, I would

1793
01:04:47,625 --> 01:04:49,119
love to sit and watch, but I don't

1794
01:04:49,119 --> 01:04:51,199
want anything serious and I don't want anything

1795
01:04:51,199 --> 01:04:52,880
I have to follow a plot to. Like,

1796
01:04:52,880 --> 01:04:54,880
I don't have that in me right now.

1797
01:04:54,880 --> 01:04:58,099
So we watched comedy specials on Netflix, which

1798
01:04:58,159 --> 01:04:58,900
was delightful.

1799
01:04:59,359 --> 01:05:02,340
Mhmm. JB, I think, discovered that he loves

1800
01:05:02,400 --> 01:05:04,775
Tom Papa, who is very funny. I think

1801
01:05:04,775 --> 01:05:06,555
it's because we're all, like, between

1802
01:05:07,015 --> 01:05:08,535
him at his age, you and I are

1803
01:05:08,535 --> 01:05:10,295
on each side of his age, and it's

1804
01:05:10,295 --> 01:05:11,755
very relatable to us. Yes.

1805
01:05:13,175 --> 01:05:14,394
Yes. Yes. Yes.

1806
01:05:14,775 --> 01:05:15,675
But yeah.

1807
01:05:17,655 --> 01:05:18,155
Yep.

1808
01:05:19,400 --> 01:05:22,760
So Rara invite invited you to, join Blue

1809
01:05:22,760 --> 01:05:25,160
Sky. I know. So here's my thing. I

1810
01:05:25,400 --> 01:05:27,880
if I were going to start another one,

1811
01:05:27,880 --> 01:05:30,200
it would probably be Blue Sky because I

1812
01:05:30,200 --> 01:05:32,440
tried Mastodon and that just wasn't my vibe.

1813
01:05:32,440 --> 01:05:33,739
Mhmm. I

1814
01:05:34,414 --> 01:05:36,494
am so out of practice on and no

1815
01:05:36,494 --> 01:05:37,315
longer know

1816
01:05:38,335 --> 01:05:40,894
how or what to ever post on a

1817
01:05:40,894 --> 01:05:43,454
text based social media. Pictures, I got. I

1818
01:05:43,454 --> 01:05:45,855
can Yeah. You know, video, I mean, it's

1819
01:05:45,855 --> 01:05:47,054
kind of a pain in the ass, but

1820
01:05:47,054 --> 01:05:48,409
I have figured myself out.

1821
01:05:48,869 --> 01:05:50,809
But just, like, my random

1822
01:05:51,109 --> 01:05:52,809
thoughts, I don't

1823
01:05:53,269 --> 01:05:56,230
know. I don't know. Yeah. So yeah. If

1824
01:05:56,230 --> 01:05:57,369
I, you know, I

1825
01:05:57,989 --> 01:06:00,010
I have not posted on Twitter

1826
01:06:00,469 --> 01:06:03,494
for loving BDS Summer, my personal Twitter in

1827
01:06:03,894 --> 01:06:06,155
a couple of years minimum. Yeah.

1828
01:06:06,454 --> 01:06:07,195
We still

1829
01:06:07,575 --> 01:06:09,595
post for the Kinkry to Twitter

1830
01:06:10,375 --> 01:06:11,655
because we do get a little bit of

1831
01:06:11,655 --> 01:06:13,434
traffic for it, but I've kind of gone,

1832
01:06:13,575 --> 01:06:16,469
I I don't I don't want to be

1833
01:06:16,469 --> 01:06:17,289
here anymore.

1834
01:06:18,469 --> 01:06:20,630
So maybe I'll move the Kinkery over to

1835
01:06:20,630 --> 01:06:22,550
Bluestock. I don't know. I don't know. I

1836
01:06:22,550 --> 01:06:24,329
know I've I've you know, with

1837
01:06:26,150 --> 01:06:27,050
Twitter, I

1838
01:06:27,724 --> 01:06:30,445
I removed, you know, my personal account. I

1839
01:06:30,445 --> 01:06:30,945
removed

1840
01:06:31,644 --> 01:06:32,625
the, Wood Dom

1841
01:06:33,565 --> 01:06:35,644
account, and those were the only two accounts

1842
01:06:35,644 --> 01:06:39,105
that I, you know Yeah. Curated and and

1843
01:06:39,724 --> 01:06:41,425
and I tell you what, when I

1844
01:06:42,989 --> 01:06:45,390
deleted the profiles and took the app off

1845
01:06:45,390 --> 01:06:47,570
of the phone and and my

1846
01:06:48,429 --> 01:06:50,829
iPad, I it was like a sigh of

1847
01:06:50,829 --> 01:06:51,329
relief.

1848
01:06:51,630 --> 01:06:52,690
Yeah. I

1849
01:06:52,989 --> 01:06:54,929
did I always forget until

1850
01:06:55,230 --> 01:06:56,445
I get to a point where I'm like,

1851
01:06:56,445 --> 01:06:58,364
what am I even doing? I always forget

1852
01:06:58,364 --> 01:06:59,905
how stressed out

1853
01:07:01,085 --> 01:07:02,864
being on Twitter makes me feel.

1854
01:07:04,204 --> 01:07:06,525
Like, it's I it's just become stressful. And

1855
01:07:06,525 --> 01:07:07,885
I'm like, why am I doing this to

1856
01:07:07,885 --> 01:07:09,150
myself? Yep.

1857
01:07:11,050 --> 01:07:11,869
So yeah.

1858
01:07:12,570 --> 01:07:13,070
But

1859
01:07:13,690 --> 01:07:14,510
Yep. Yep.

1860
01:07:18,170 --> 01:07:18,670
Anyhow.

1861
01:07:19,050 --> 01:07:20,349
Yeah. Right now, we're

1862
01:07:21,155 --> 01:07:22,054
working towards

1863
01:07:22,355 --> 01:07:24,675
Black Friday Mhmm. Because that's a very important

1864
01:07:24,914 --> 01:07:27,494
Yep. Time and anybody who sells things

1865
01:07:27,875 --> 01:07:30,214
kind of calendar. But we're also

1866
01:07:31,074 --> 01:07:32,355
I'm very proud of us because the past

1867
01:07:32,355 --> 01:07:33,795
couple years, this has been a struggle. I've

1868
01:07:33,795 --> 01:07:35,315
not been on top of it like I

1869
01:07:35,315 --> 01:07:37,014
used to be. We're actually

1870
01:07:38,010 --> 01:07:38,910
in 2024

1871
01:07:39,929 --> 01:07:40,429
looking

1872
01:07:41,050 --> 01:07:42,750
towards planning for

1873
01:07:43,210 --> 01:07:43,710
2025.

1874
01:07:44,489 --> 01:07:46,910
Yeah. Not everything. Like, there used to be

1875
01:07:47,050 --> 01:07:49,610
a time we would have multiple coffee dates

1876
01:07:49,610 --> 01:07:50,989
and I would plan out,

1877
01:07:52,885 --> 01:07:53,385
topics.

1878
01:07:54,085 --> 01:07:56,005
I would plan out this. I would plan

1879
01:07:56,005 --> 01:07:57,785
out that. No. No. No. No. No. No.

1880
01:07:59,045 --> 01:08:01,925
I am less intense about that. But we

1881
01:08:01,925 --> 01:08:04,025
are, yeah, we are actually, like, thinking

1882
01:08:04,805 --> 01:08:07,409
about the future and remembering that that it

1883
01:08:07,409 --> 01:08:08,630
will be a new year

1884
01:08:09,250 --> 01:08:10,929
sooner than we imagined. I'm very proud of

1885
01:08:10,929 --> 01:08:13,969
us. Yeah. That feels like it feels like

1886
01:08:13,969 --> 01:08:15,650
a turning point. Because for a couple of

1887
01:08:15,650 --> 01:08:16,149
years,

1888
01:08:17,170 --> 01:08:18,689
we did not get to plan anything. We

1889
01:08:18,689 --> 01:08:21,164
had to react to everything. Right. And I

1890
01:08:21,164 --> 01:08:24,465
would just literally forget time exists. And so

1891
01:08:24,765 --> 01:08:26,864
I was like, oh, yeah. It's like

1892
01:08:27,485 --> 01:08:29,564
3 days into January. Aren't we supposed to

1893
01:08:29,564 --> 01:08:32,539
do things? The first day, no. Yeah. I'm

1894
01:08:32,539 --> 01:08:33,819
being a little bit more on top of

1895
01:08:33,819 --> 01:08:36,239
it. Yeah. It's kinda nice. Bad cat asked,

1896
01:08:36,539 --> 01:08:38,859
do we have a which vending event coming

1897
01:08:38,859 --> 01:08:40,460
up? No. We do not.

1898
01:08:40,939 --> 01:08:43,599
We have done that event in the past.

1899
01:08:43,659 --> 01:08:46,005
This year, we we did not. We did

1900
01:08:46,005 --> 01:08:46,985
not have the,

1901
01:08:48,965 --> 01:08:52,005
bandwidth and inventory to do a do the

1902
01:08:52,005 --> 01:08:52,505
live,

1903
01:08:54,485 --> 01:08:56,485
event. We could not we could not make

1904
01:08:56,485 --> 01:08:58,405
enough stuff for for both. It was never

1905
01:08:58,405 --> 01:09:00,405
gonna happen. And, as for what I'm making

1906
01:09:00,405 --> 01:09:02,149
for family and friends, I'll give you a

1907
01:09:02,149 --> 01:09:05,189
quick peek of a couple things. Sure. And

1908
01:09:05,189 --> 01:09:07,350
for podcast listeners, we will try to verbally

1909
01:09:07,350 --> 01:09:10,069
describe it for you since you cannot see

1910
01:09:10,069 --> 01:09:10,569
that.

1911
01:09:13,029 --> 01:09:13,529
Yeah.

1912
01:09:14,284 --> 01:09:16,445
We have a very small family, so we

1913
01:09:16,445 --> 01:09:17,984
don't have we're not

1914
01:09:18,524 --> 01:09:20,685
we're not given a, like, a bunch of

1915
01:09:20,685 --> 01:09:22,045
guests having to you know, JB is not

1916
01:09:22,045 --> 01:09:24,225
making a lot a lot of things.

1917
01:09:24,845 --> 01:09:27,885
So and we have thankfully, our family members

1918
01:09:27,885 --> 01:09:28,545
are very

1919
01:09:29,810 --> 01:09:30,310
appreciative

1920
01:09:30,930 --> 01:09:32,869
of, you know, what

1921
01:09:33,250 --> 01:09:33,750
JB

1922
01:09:34,449 --> 01:09:35,270
can do.

1923
01:09:36,449 --> 01:09:38,289
And they've also learned that there are guinea

1924
01:09:38,289 --> 01:09:41,250
pigs. Yeah. Yeah. He'll go, I wanna try

1925
01:09:41,250 --> 01:09:42,755
making this. And then it's a it's a

1926
01:09:42,755 --> 01:09:44,594
Christmas present, and then he decides, do I

1927
01:09:44,594 --> 01:09:46,994
wanna make this all the time? So okay.

1928
01:09:46,994 --> 01:09:47,875
What you got? So,

1929
01:09:49,234 --> 01:09:51,554
you know, the the family members, they all

1930
01:09:51,554 --> 01:09:52,054
love

1931
01:09:52,354 --> 01:09:54,510
Christmas ornaments. Oh my gosh. Yes.

1932
01:09:55,149 --> 01:09:57,469
So, you know, in between everything, I've been

1933
01:09:57,469 --> 01:09:58,109
sitting at the,

1934
01:09:59,630 --> 01:10:00,529
scroll saw

1935
01:10:01,389 --> 01:10:02,849
and and have been making

1936
01:10:03,389 --> 01:10:06,210
Christmas ornaments. Yep. You've got an angel. Angel.

1937
01:10:06,590 --> 01:10:09,265
And, for podcast listeners, it's not like just

1938
01:10:09,265 --> 01:10:11,425
the outline. He's got these intricate cuts, like,

1939
01:10:11,425 --> 01:10:13,585
into the angel wings and down the angel,

1940
01:10:13,585 --> 01:10:16,064
like, robe thing and whatever. This this still

1941
01:10:16,064 --> 01:10:16,885
has the template

1942
01:10:17,345 --> 01:10:19,185
on it. These they're they are far from

1943
01:10:19,185 --> 01:10:22,484
done. Yeah. Because you've done done the cut.

1944
01:10:22,545 --> 01:10:24,149
Right. You'll have to do what? The sanding?

1945
01:10:24,149 --> 01:10:25,350
I have to I have to do some

1946
01:10:25,350 --> 01:10:27,189
sanding on them now. And then there's the

1947
01:10:27,189 --> 01:10:29,189
finishing. Then an ornament in the shape of

1948
01:10:29,189 --> 01:10:30,949
an ornament. I I love it when we

1949
01:10:30,949 --> 01:10:32,789
get meta. That's fine. But this and the

1950
01:10:32,789 --> 01:10:35,350
thing is, what makes these special and unique

1951
01:10:35,350 --> 01:10:37,189
is, again, it's not just that he cut

1952
01:10:37,189 --> 01:10:40,064
out the outline. There's designs cut out into

1953
01:10:40,064 --> 01:10:42,304
the center. Is that is that another ornament

1954
01:10:42,304 --> 01:10:44,324
in the shape of an ornament? Yeah. Okay.

1955
01:10:45,425 --> 01:10:47,024
That's a round one. Was is that a

1956
01:10:47,024 --> 01:10:49,284
Christmas tree cut out of the center? Yeah.

1957
01:10:49,609 --> 01:10:50,109
Okay.

1958
01:10:50,729 --> 01:10:52,569
You didn't have to do the booty guru

1959
01:10:52,809 --> 01:10:54,569
Oh, well, I know you have thing to

1960
01:10:54,569 --> 01:10:55,069
me.

1961
01:10:56,809 --> 01:10:58,250
Mhmm. Well but, yeah, these these are the

1962
01:10:58,329 --> 01:10:59,689
these are what some of the things I've

1963
01:10:59,689 --> 01:11:00,989
been working on. Mhmm.

1964
01:11:01,609 --> 01:11:03,770
And, I don't have do I have them?

1965
01:11:03,770 --> 01:11:06,645
Oh, yeah. The butter board. Butter boards. I

1966
01:11:06,645 --> 01:11:08,484
am still I think they're beautiful, but I'm

1967
01:11:08,484 --> 01:11:11,925
still confused about when a butter board is

1968
01:11:11,925 --> 01:11:12,425
used

1969
01:11:13,444 --> 01:11:14,185
or how.

1970
01:11:15,925 --> 01:11:18,185
Family dinner? So you're having a big meal,

1971
01:11:18,645 --> 01:11:20,479
and butter is gonna be served, like, for

1972
01:11:20,479 --> 01:11:22,239
bread or for whatever you might put. And

1973
01:11:22,239 --> 01:11:23,840
you would just put your butter on this

1974
01:11:23,840 --> 01:11:25,840
board. You put your stick of butter. Okay.

1975
01:11:25,840 --> 01:11:27,119
And then it then it has a,

1976
01:11:28,320 --> 01:11:29,680
a a butter knife. And you pull that

1977
01:11:29,680 --> 01:11:31,600
out, and it's right. The butter knife butter

1978
01:11:31,760 --> 01:11:33,895
when the butter knife's made, it sits. There's

1979
01:11:33,895 --> 01:11:36,614
a slot underneath the butter board. Right. And

1980
01:11:36,614 --> 01:11:38,695
so it it's all one it all looks

1981
01:11:38,695 --> 01:11:41,414
like one thing. So then after the meal

1982
01:11:41,414 --> 01:11:44,135
and you put your unused butter back wherever

1983
01:11:44,135 --> 01:11:46,375
you put it, fridge or whatever, how would

1984
01:11:46,375 --> 01:11:47,489
you clean that off?

1985
01:11:52,210 --> 01:11:52,710
Soap

1986
01:11:55,010 --> 01:11:57,250
same way you do the cutting boards. Okay.

1987
01:11:57,250 --> 01:11:58,310
Same same thing.

1988
01:11:58,770 --> 01:11:59,270
Just

1989
01:12:00,074 --> 01:12:02,735
water. Mhmm. If you really need to clean

1990
01:12:02,875 --> 01:12:03,454
it good,

1991
01:12:04,155 --> 01:12:07,914
salt Okay. And a lemon. Okay. Okay. And

1992
01:12:07,914 --> 01:12:08,815
then you just

1993
01:12:09,195 --> 01:12:11,275
And then you can always re wood butter

1994
01:12:11,275 --> 01:12:13,260
it. And then you re re re wax

1995
01:12:13,260 --> 01:12:16,939
Yep. Mhmm. Mhmm. Yep. Yep. Yep. So yeah.

1996
01:12:16,939 --> 01:12:18,699
I still I still have to make the

1997
01:12:18,779 --> 01:12:20,460
matter of fact, I just glued up the

1998
01:12:20,460 --> 01:12:22,539
the pieces for the to make the knives

1999
01:12:22,699 --> 01:12:24,300
To go with the to go with these.

2000
01:12:24,300 --> 01:12:24,800
Yeah.

2001
01:12:25,179 --> 01:12:27,524
Yep. Yep. So that's that's what I've been

2002
01:12:27,685 --> 01:12:30,664
playing with. Mhmm. In between everything else. Mhmm.

2003
01:12:31,765 --> 01:12:32,505
Yeah. And

2004
01:12:32,885 --> 01:12:34,725
think like I said, thankfully, our family is

2005
01:12:34,725 --> 01:12:35,204
very,

2006
01:12:35,685 --> 01:12:38,505
appreciative, and they they get that this was

2007
01:12:38,725 --> 01:12:41,670
skill and time and Mhmm. So they don't,

2008
01:12:41,829 --> 01:12:42,489
you know

2009
01:12:42,789 --> 01:12:44,789
plus they just think that whatever JB makes

2010
01:12:44,789 --> 01:12:46,149
is, like, the best thing they've ever seen

2011
01:12:46,149 --> 01:12:48,069
in their fucking life, which is helpful, which

2012
01:12:48,069 --> 01:12:48,729
is helpful.

2013
01:12:52,229 --> 01:12:53,289
So yeah.

2014
01:12:55,109 --> 01:12:55,609
But

2015
01:12:56,774 --> 01:12:58,875
I'll come. Okay. Anything else?

2016
01:12:59,654 --> 01:13:02,074
That's about it for me. Yeah. Me too.

2017
01:13:02,454 --> 01:13:04,295
There will be more next week because next

2018
01:13:04,295 --> 01:13:04,694
week,

2019
01:13:05,255 --> 01:13:07,335
will will we even still have hair left

2020
01:13:07,335 --> 01:13:08,534
or will we have pulled it out by

2021
01:13:08,534 --> 01:13:10,074
the time we do the Wednesday livestream

2022
01:13:11,399 --> 01:13:12,760
knowing that we're prepping for Black Friday? I

2023
01:13:12,760 --> 01:13:15,000
I intend I intend to buzz mine off

2024
01:13:15,000 --> 01:13:16,520
in the next couple days. That way, I

2025
01:13:16,520 --> 01:13:18,859
can't pull it out. There you go. Yeah.

2026
01:13:18,920 --> 01:13:20,939
We might we might just collapse

2027
01:13:21,319 --> 01:13:23,340
into our chairs for the livestream

2028
01:13:23,719 --> 01:13:26,104
and recording and just, like, look like zombies.

2029
01:13:26,104 --> 01:13:27,625
I don't know. Like, when we were talking

2030
01:13:27,625 --> 01:13:29,225
about it, I was like, okay. So over

2031
01:13:29,225 --> 01:13:30,664
the next 4 days, I'm gonna help you

2032
01:13:30,664 --> 01:13:32,664
make all these paddles. And then the 3

2033
01:13:32,664 --> 01:13:34,585
or 4 days after that, I'm gonna do

2034
01:13:34,585 --> 01:13:36,505
all these things. And in between, I'm gonna

2035
01:13:36,505 --> 01:13:39,064
make candles. And he was like, yep. That

2036
01:13:39,064 --> 01:13:41,170
sounds like you're saying you're gonna try to

2037
01:13:41,170 --> 01:13:42,310
do that. Mhmm.

2038
01:13:43,250 --> 01:13:45,649
Mhmm. So it's exciting. I I I love

2039
01:13:45,649 --> 01:13:46,470
it. I just

2040
01:13:47,409 --> 01:13:48,770
I'm now at an age where I just

2041
01:13:48,770 --> 01:13:50,689
know how tired we'll be. Yeah. So you

2042
01:13:50,689 --> 01:13:52,310
just Yep. You just know.

2043
01:13:52,850 --> 01:13:53,350
Anyway,

2044
01:13:54,215 --> 01:13:56,295
we're gonna go. Yeah. We'll see y'all next

2045
01:13:56,295 --> 01:13:56,795
week.

2046
01:13:58,215 --> 01:13:59,894
Thanks for being here. Thanks for sticking to

2047
01:13:59,894 --> 01:14:01,994
the bitter end. Always glad to have you

2048
01:14:02,135 --> 01:14:03,434
hang out with us. Yeah.

2049
01:14:03,894 --> 01:14:05,894
Oh, and spoiler, we're gonna do a Reddit

2050
01:14:05,894 --> 01:14:08,369
response episode next week, so maybe I'll rant,

2051
01:14:08,369 --> 01:14:10,210
and we'll all have a good time. Woo

2052
01:14:10,210 --> 01:14:11,430
hoo. We'll find out.

2053
01:14:12,130 --> 01:14:12,630
Okay.

2054
01:14:13,170 --> 01:14:14,310
Bye. Bye.