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You're listening to loving Bd and podcast episode

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04:01. Holy shit. Yeah. Kill here with the

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1 the only the guy who would totally

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do the podcast naked if he thought he

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could get away with it jump out soon?

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I wouldn't. If there was no live. There

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was no live component, I wouldn't. Yeah, Don't

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a mind to underwear back in the day.

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Just be naked. Yeah. Yeah. Mh. I mean,

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I'm I'm down for that. I'm pretty sure

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if we revived our only fan page, other

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people would probably be down for that too.

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Yeah. Just

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sit it... See us sitting there naked,

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talking into the mic. Her phone.

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Mh. Mh. Nick, oh, god. Don't give me

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more ideas. She said to herself. Okay. So

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worry your Nikki Time with Jb and Kayla.

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Know. You know I was thinking again.

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That is not what we are here for.

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This week... We're talking about something that I'm

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kind of calling Task creep in Ds relationships,

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Mh. Which is similar to just like the...

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I stole the idea from the concept. Of

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role or job creep in the workplace. Yeah.

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If... Anybody who's ever

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been slowly assigned more work or slowly taken

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on more work than you are paid to

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do. You know what this is.

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Yep. You got it. We're gonna talk about

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it in power exchange.

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Well, to the loving Bd podcast. This is

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your first time listening Glad to have you.

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If you're back for another week. Welcome back.

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Loving Bd has produced every Monday and Friday

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for your Kinky pleasure in education and show

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notes are found at loving bd m dot

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net. Come back often and feel free to

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add the podcast to your favorite podcast app.

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You can also follow the show on Fe

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life at Loving Bd Pc, the Pcs Dance

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podcast y'all. On Instagram and threads at that

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handle, I will forever. Fucking hate. Loving d

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and the number 1, so at loving DS1

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or on Youtube at Youtube dot com slash

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loving Bd where you can watch us live

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from the podcast every Wednesday.

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All links are in the show notes. A

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big thanks as always to our Kinky patrons

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over on Patreon including our newest

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We're able to be these wild ass weirdo

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on the Internet in large part because of

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our kinky patrons, and we are grateful for

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every fucking wonderful.

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If you'd like to join our kinky community

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and get access to extra content and a

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discord server with a group of super cool

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super nice gangster, you can do that. Just

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join us at patreon dot com slash kayla

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Lords that's patreon dot com slash kayla Lords,

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or use a link in the show notes.

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Your button push her from way back.

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Okay. Before we get into this week's topic,

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I've got

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announcements.

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The first 1 is,

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we are taking our little summer break that

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we do.

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Next week. So

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we are recording slash streaming on,

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June nineteenth, June. Happy June tenth for anybody

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who, acknowledge that 1.

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I shouldn't say acknowledge. Celebrate is it celebrating

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I should be celebrated?

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I don't know. But happy June teens. I

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have fucked that all the way up. I

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apologize.

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So the week after this week after June

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nineteenth,

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we're on a break. There'll be no podcast.

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No. There'll be no live stream. There'll be

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no newsletter. No. There's none of that. Why?

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Because my mother going to down.

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So, we're actually kind of starting our break

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a little early because we have to clean

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the house from top to bottom.

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The day after we record this. Mh.

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So

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1 thing of note because somebody will ask

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in our,

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Patreon community we do a monthly game night,

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which is next week during our break. Yes,

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We will still do game night.

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The other announcement it is that we are

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going live for our monthly

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virtual

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months,

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Friday night, June 20 first, starting at 09:30PM,

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Eastern.

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So

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hope you will join us for that.

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And then

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third announcement,

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it looks like as of our recording schedule

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and all of our plans.

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The Monday episodes will be back.

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July eighth.

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They could be back July first if we

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weren't going on a break extra.

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You're not recording that. So we'll bring it

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back the following week. So

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If you have questions, we are still accepting

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them. We just have enough now that we're

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like, yeah, Let's get back to it. But

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we are constantly

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accepting

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questions. And I wanna

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retry and redo a happy June team. Okay.

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If you don't know what June tenth is,

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certainly no expert. But basically,

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06/19/1865

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is when enslaved people in Texas were 5

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informed

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that they were supposed to be free.

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Not not at the actual time, please Don't

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asking me the data for other it up.

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So it's a federal holiday. It's a legit

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thing.

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Happy June team.

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Okay.

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Let's get into the topic. Now that I've

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butcher that. Just fucking

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that. Oh,

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okay.

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I have to go by the script because

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topped it all. Okay. So this week's topic

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is

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ripped from the headlines of our own life.

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But also, I stole a vanilla

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concept to because I recognized parallels.

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And in the vanilla world, what I want

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us to talk about in the whole idea

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of task creep is usually known as job

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creep, more roll creep. So let's talk about

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what that is.

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1 of the best definitions I

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found of my lord, of course. Mh he's

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and ads and just...

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There it is. Okay.

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Here's the definition. It 1 of the... They're

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all basically same, but it was an easy

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1 I found. Job creep also referred to

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as role creep happens when 1 performs tasks

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that are outside of their role or the

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agreed scope of their job.

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Anybody who's ever had to work for somebody

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else who gets to tell you what to

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do has probably experienced some level of this.

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I job creeped myself into 4 roles at

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my last big girl job. Job. And it

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wasn't until my last year there that I

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got paid

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more and had some of the work taken

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off of me. But, yeah, I was under

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the umbrella of ford job titles

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at 1 point in that job. There might

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be a reason why. I don't do that

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work anymore.

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So, yeah, there's this thing with you are

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expected to do a job, and you have

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somebody who manages you leads you is the

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boss of you.

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And over time, they may

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assign things to you, you may agree to

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take things on whatever it is. And before

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you know it, you are doing things. You

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should not agree to do that you're not

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in this case being paid to do.

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And you might not wanna do, Leads to

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burnout leads to resentment leads all kinds of

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bad feelings.

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Guess what? Something like that can have an

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power exchange.

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Shocking. Right? Shocking. Fascinating.

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So let's try to define task creep and

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power exchange. K. My experience with it as

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a service submissive has been

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doing things for my dominant partner that we

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did not sit down and negotiate and come

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up with parameters for. He did not ask

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me to do. I just started. Mh.

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And without that

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negotiation,

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the

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expectation was set that I would still do

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it. Now, I only know my ants, but

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I have no doubt that dominance can be...

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You can have task creep too. They might

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not... You might not think of it that

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way. Maybe roll creep where you're doing more,

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Mh. Than you originally agreed to do,

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and there hasn't been

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a solid serious

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conversation. Right? About it. Okay? And I think

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the same exact things that can have... That

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happen in the workplace are gonna happen in

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a relationship. If you don't talk about it

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and get it sorted, and that is resentment,

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and that is

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expectation management.

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That is where

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we realized that I was doing things. Mh.

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That we hadn't negotiated because I didn't do

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it 1 day because it wasn't an official

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task. Right. And somebody was not happy with

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that.

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I'm like, wait. What happened here? What's going

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on? And he used the. Big d voice

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and I pushed back

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because that was not the appropriate use of

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the big d voice.

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So it absolutely can happen to either side

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of the slash.

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Unless Jb b

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shocks me with something that he feels is

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task creep, But I have a feeling we'll

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probably focus more on the submissive side of

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things.

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It's okay if You young. We know you're

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not bored. We know you're exhausted. It's okay.

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Poor. Pocket listeners you can't see it, poor

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Jamie keeps trying to, like, swallow was jan.

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Okay. So

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Okay. So I do think it's more common

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amongst it missiles. Mh.

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I

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I think any kind of submissive can find

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themselves in this situation because it might be

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a thing that you're asked to do as

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a 1 off from a dominant partner Mh.

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And you do, and then somehow that kind

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of sets the expectation, you'll do it every

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time. And and and what it is kemp

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can be early anything.

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It could be a kin activity sexual activity.

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It could be task oriented. It could be

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in service of your dominant partner, like, it

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can be anything.

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I feel it, and I wonder if it

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maybe is more common in service submissive.

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Because as service,

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we tend to be,

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you know, trying to wanting to looking for

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ways to... In whatever way you define this

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for take care of our dominant partner,

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and it is real real easy to take

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on

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tasks

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and

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create habits around shit. You never had a

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conversation about, you know? Like we... Like,

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right out of the headlines of,

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our relationship. The 1 where Jb got upset

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with me.

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We had just started taking... I don't think

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we had just started. Had been trying to

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take probiotics

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to fix our own got health. Yeah. Doing

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it for a while. Had we been doing

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it for while? Okay. Mh. I had gotten

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a couple of times. I had

272
00:10:20,909 --> 00:10:23,241
been popping mine out of the blister pack,

273
00:10:24,193 --> 00:10:25,937
and I did it for Jb. 2 reasons.

274
00:10:26,095 --> 00:10:27,602
1, I was right there. I was like,

275
00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:28,315
oh I'll just do it.

276
00:10:29,187 --> 00:10:29,742
And 2,

277
00:10:30,789 --> 00:10:33,102
I love Jb. He is capable of many,

278
00:10:33,262 --> 00:10:35,416
many things. Blister packs or his enemy. I

279
00:10:35,416 --> 00:10:37,171
don't know what it is beautiful they are.

280
00:10:37,903 --> 00:10:39,569
They have some. And if you're like, what

281
00:10:39,569 --> 00:10:41,473
is a blister pack? It's the plastic pack

282
00:10:41,473 --> 00:10:43,060
that has, like, the aluminum foil on the

283
00:10:43,060 --> 00:10:44,250
back and your supposed a pop and then

284
00:10:44,250 --> 00:10:47,071
the paper. Over that. Yeah. Now. So.

285
00:10:47,766 --> 00:10:48,084
Hate.

286
00:10:49,597 --> 00:10:51,849
He was forgetting to take his probiotic

287
00:10:52,225 --> 00:10:52,725
regularly.

288
00:10:53,434 --> 00:10:55,273
If I wasn't having breakfast with him, he

289
00:10:55,273 --> 00:10:56,152
might not remember.

290
00:10:57,270 --> 00:10:58,389
I knew he struggled,

291
00:10:58,949 --> 00:11:01,586
and I am that type of person that

292
00:11:01,586 --> 00:11:03,025
if I do a thing for you 1,

293
00:11:03,439 --> 00:11:04,796
don't wanna be perceived while I'm doing it,

294
00:11:04,875 --> 00:11:06,312
but 2, I love it to be like

295
00:11:06,312 --> 00:11:07,988
a little happy surprise that you walk in

296
00:11:07,988 --> 00:11:09,743
and go, oh, this is already done me.

297
00:11:09,903 --> 00:11:11,434
I get a lot of fucking kick out

298
00:11:11,434 --> 00:11:14,225
of that. I pure joy when I can

299
00:11:14,225 --> 00:11:15,900
have a thing done and it's a pleasant

300
00:11:15,900 --> 00:11:17,416
surprise. I don't know whether that's about. Haven't

301
00:11:17,416 --> 00:11:18,054
investigated that.

302
00:11:18,851 --> 00:11:20,766
So I just started doing it. I just

303
00:11:20,766 --> 00:11:22,770
it would be be part of my rounds

304
00:11:22,770 --> 00:11:23,407
in the morning.

305
00:11:24,043 --> 00:11:26,192
About his probiotic pot mine out, Move on

306
00:11:26,192 --> 00:11:27,703
with my morning. Now. Now part of that

307
00:11:27,703 --> 00:11:29,454
come about too because a lot of times

308
00:11:29,454 --> 00:11:32,652
in the morning. Especially weekdays. She will start

309
00:11:32,652 --> 00:11:35,358
her breakfast before. Oh, yeah. I head into

310
00:11:35,358 --> 00:11:37,269
the kitchen. Yeah. Your sipping on your coffee.

311
00:11:37,507 --> 00:11:38,940
Long past the time, I'm ready to nam

312
00:11:38,940 --> 00:11:39,577
my own arm off.

313
00:11:40,229 --> 00:11:40,729
So

314
00:11:41,987 --> 00:11:43,666
1 day, and I don't remember what I

315
00:11:43,666 --> 00:11:46,063
was thinking about why I didn't do it.

316
00:11:46,223 --> 00:11:48,221
Mh. But I remember in my head going.

317
00:11:48,380 --> 00:11:51,352
Well, it's not an official task. I'm supposed

318
00:11:51,352 --> 00:11:51,912
to do.

319
00:11:52,711 --> 00:11:55,029
I'm not even sure anymore why I'm doing

320
00:11:55,029 --> 00:11:57,186
it. And for whatever reason that day, I

321
00:11:57,186 --> 00:11:58,705
was like, I just don't feel like doing

322
00:11:58,705 --> 00:12:00,308
it. And so I didn't.

323
00:12:01,972 --> 00:12:04,349
And when Jb went to have his breakfast,

324
00:12:04,508 --> 00:12:06,038
which is when he takes biotic

325
00:12:07,137 --> 00:12:07,637
he

326
00:12:08,009 --> 00:12:10,093
in a calm patient

327
00:12:11,099 --> 00:12:13,610
Daddy Dumb blew a gasket. Mh. He was

328
00:12:13,888 --> 00:12:16,455
mad y'all. He was like, where's my probiotic?

329
00:12:16,910 --> 00:12:18,977
I was like, I didn't do it.

330
00:12:19,693 --> 00:12:21,442
And he went, why the hell not? And

331
00:12:21,522 --> 00:12:23,135
I'm like, excuse me

332
00:12:23,923 --> 00:12:26,977
excuse No. Nope. That is not a negotiated

333
00:12:27,035 --> 00:12:27,514
task.

334
00:12:28,631 --> 00:12:30,306
And he was... Seized he's not his grumpy

335
00:12:30,306 --> 00:12:32,639
face on because was before breakfast fee, you

336
00:12:32,639 --> 00:12:34,799
know, yes, he had coffee, no to breakfast

337
00:12:34,799 --> 00:12:36,559
though a little hungry. About half a cup

338
00:12:36,559 --> 00:12:39,039
of coffee. Little hungry. And so in that

339
00:12:39,039 --> 00:12:39,600
moment I went.

340
00:12:40,333 --> 00:12:42,985
Would you like it to be a negotiated

341
00:12:43,202 --> 00:12:43,600
task.

342
00:12:44,875 --> 00:12:46,787
We did that negotiation in about 30 minutes.

343
00:12:47,026 --> 00:12:48,318
30 against yes.

344
00:12:48,878 --> 00:12:51,194
Yeah. Yep. Is this something you want me

345
00:12:51,194 --> 00:12:53,351
to do every day? Mh. You went, why?

346
00:12:53,511 --> 00:12:56,081
Yes. I would. I is fine. And now

347
00:12:56,081 --> 00:12:57,917
every day. You know, part of the product

348
00:12:57,917 --> 00:12:58,417
in

349
00:12:58,875 --> 00:13:00,630
with it not being there that day. Mh.

350
00:13:00,870 --> 00:13:02,306
I was like, I was in my head.

351
00:13:02,466 --> 00:13:04,156
I'm like, Did I take it? Did I

352
00:13:04,156 --> 00:13:05,432
not take it. I don't remember taking it,

353
00:13:05,512 --> 00:13:06,469
but I might have taken it.

354
00:13:07,347 --> 00:13:08,963
I don't know if I took it. Mh

355
00:13:09,740 --> 00:13:10,240
You

356
00:13:10,776 --> 00:13:12,792
doing 1 of those begging forth it. So

357
00:13:14,455 --> 00:13:17,236
Yes. And so, yeah. But because I had

358
00:13:17,236 --> 00:13:19,859
set that expectation and had been consistent. Like,

359
00:13:20,097 --> 00:13:21,706
I think... 1 thing if you do it

360
00:13:21,706 --> 00:13:23,142
1 time, and then you don't do it

361
00:13:23,142 --> 00:13:25,615
again for a long time. Mh. You it

362
00:13:25,615 --> 00:13:28,023
was... It was a 1 off, and You

363
00:13:28,023 --> 00:13:29,539
might have a partner who goes, hey, could

364
00:13:29,539 --> 00:13:30,735
you do that for me again?

365
00:13:32,011 --> 00:13:33,766
Sure, of course or negotiating. You know you

366
00:13:33,766 --> 00:13:35,361
can't. But it was the fact that I

367
00:13:35,361 --> 00:13:36,796
got into a bit of a routine.

368
00:13:37,529 --> 00:13:39,927
And so I set the expectation for Jb,

369
00:13:40,646 --> 00:13:42,963
and I I wondered at the time, we

370
00:13:42,963 --> 00:13:44,881
didn't really talk about it. If it was

371
00:13:44,881 --> 00:13:45,200
because...

372
00:13:46,413 --> 00:13:48,725
Because the things I do is tasks are

373
00:13:48,725 --> 00:13:49,225
so

374
00:13:50,479 --> 00:13:51,218
routine oriented.

375
00:13:51,835 --> 00:13:53,908
If you just sort of assumed that we

376
00:13:53,908 --> 00:13:55,673
must have had the converse station because here

377
00:13:55,832 --> 00:13:56,490
I was

378
00:13:57,259 --> 00:14:00,115
doing it consistently. Yeah. No. I I know

379
00:14:00,115 --> 00:14:00,908
we didn't have the con.

380
00:14:02,891 --> 00:14:05,060
When He has not hitting the bottle. Y'all.

381
00:14:05,220 --> 00:14:07,796
I promise. I'm sorry, Folks. I

382
00:14:08,413 --> 00:14:09,771
I mean, you want him to now now

383
00:14:09,771 --> 00:14:10,888
that I am so sorry.

384
00:14:12,979 --> 00:14:15,291
But anyway, no. I I knew that you

385
00:14:15,291 --> 00:14:15,791
hadn't

386
00:14:16,965 --> 00:14:18,799
you know, that we hadn't talked about it.

387
00:14:18,958 --> 00:14:19,357
Mh.

388
00:14:20,313 --> 00:14:20,792
But,

389
00:14:21,762 --> 00:14:24,145
you had been doing it for so long

390
00:14:24,224 --> 00:14:25,336
Mh. At that point,

391
00:14:26,209 --> 00:14:27,956
that I just become used to it. So

392
00:14:27,956 --> 00:14:29,624
it's funny because to me in my memory

393
00:14:29,624 --> 00:14:31,228
of it at least or my perception I

394
00:14:31,228 --> 00:14:32,423
didn't think I've been doing it that 1.

395
00:14:32,900 --> 00:14:36,086
0, yeah. How any idea? Because I would

396
00:14:36,086 --> 00:14:37,064
say probably

397
00:14:37,838 --> 00:14:39,804
3 months maybe. Oh, no. It would definitely

398
00:14:40,004 --> 00:14:42,241
I don't think Oh, yeah. Oh yes. I

399
00:14:42,241 --> 00:14:43,919
feel like it was a few weeks. No.

400
00:14:45,038 --> 00:14:47,275
No. Much longer than We'll have to agree

401
00:14:47,275 --> 00:14:48,649
to degree on that Good.

402
00:14:51,129 --> 00:14:53,210
But... And what I wish I remembered, I

403
00:14:53,210 --> 00:14:55,129
didn't know it would be content later. What

404
00:14:55,289 --> 00:14:56,509
I wish I remembered

405
00:14:56,984 --> 00:14:58,658
is why in that 1 day I went...

406
00:14:58,817 --> 00:15:00,730
No. I don't have to do it. Because

407
00:15:00,730 --> 00:15:02,563
when something is part of my routine,

408
00:15:03,121 --> 00:15:04,636
I just I just get on with it.

409
00:15:05,208 --> 00:15:06,187
Yeah. Think

410
00:15:06,564 --> 00:15:08,716
I think I've gotten maybe a little bored

411
00:15:08,716 --> 00:15:11,427
with that. Wasn't it was an exciting and

412
00:15:11,427 --> 00:15:11,927
interesting

413
00:15:14,475 --> 00:15:16,315
I don't know. I don't know why that

414
00:15:16,315 --> 00:15:18,074
matters, but I know how I am. And

415
00:15:18,074 --> 00:15:18,954
sometimes that matters.

416
00:15:19,914 --> 00:15:21,995
But, yeah, that was a real swift in

417
00:15:21,995 --> 00:15:24,029
the moment. Yeah. Task

418
00:15:24,408 --> 00:15:24,887
negotiation. Mh.

419
00:15:25,926 --> 00:15:27,704
It did her... I mean, I was annoyed

420
00:15:27,843 --> 00:15:30,400
because I knew we had negotiated it. Yeah.

421
00:15:30,735 --> 00:15:33,214
But I also understood Jb perspective. I have

422
00:15:33,214 --> 00:15:35,375
gotten him used to it? He... There... Why

423
00:15:35,375 --> 00:15:37,054
wouldn't he expect me to keep doing a

424
00:15:37,054 --> 00:15:38,355
thing I've been doing

425
00:15:38,827 --> 00:15:41,610
every day for somewhere between 1 and 3

426
00:15:41,610 --> 00:15:43,360
months will agree to disagree.

427
00:15:45,109 --> 00:15:48,091
So I I totally get your perspective. What

428
00:15:48,148 --> 00:15:50,618
helped in that moment is how quickly you

429
00:15:50,618 --> 00:15:53,087
backed off when I reminded you this was

430
00:15:53,087 --> 00:15:55,499
not 1 of my tasks to follow

431
00:15:56,289 --> 00:15:58,627
And I think it helped that I immediately

432
00:15:58,686 --> 00:16:00,444
turned to when, would you like it to

433
00:16:00,444 --> 00:16:02,682
be so we could get it resolved. And

434
00:16:02,682 --> 00:16:05,493
then after that 1 day, I I have

435
00:16:05,493 --> 00:16:07,831
been later in the morning with it sometimes,

436
00:16:08,449 --> 00:16:10,766
but I've never not done never forgotten in

437
00:16:10,766 --> 00:16:12,797
her. Yeah. If And,

438
00:16:13,251 --> 00:16:14,921
okay. Let me ask you this. Mh.

439
00:16:16,113 --> 00:16:18,577
The the the current box of probiotic that

440
00:16:18,577 --> 00:16:20,803
we have. Yes. When was that bought?

441
00:16:21,855 --> 00:16:22,495
A month ago.

442
00:16:23,214 --> 00:16:25,074
Okay. Then it's been at least 2 months

443
00:16:25,934 --> 00:16:27,454
because it was the... You were doing it

444
00:16:27,454 --> 00:16:28,355
with the prior

445
00:16:29,386 --> 00:16:29,625
Yeah.

446
00:16:30,820 --> 00:16:32,652
Do you know how long ago we negotiated

447
00:16:32,652 --> 00:16:32,811
that?

448
00:16:34,723 --> 00:16:36,077
Task... Do you know how long I've been

449
00:16:36,077 --> 00:16:37,033
doing that task for you?

450
00:16:38,244 --> 00:16:39,043
2 or 3 years.

451
00:16:39,682 --> 00:16:40,961
It wasn't this box.

452
00:16:41,839 --> 00:16:42,239
U.

453
00:16:44,156 --> 00:16:46,325
It's been since we moved in. Here, but

454
00:16:46,405 --> 00:16:48,076
I've been doing it 2 or 3 years

455
00:16:48,076 --> 00:16:49,611
because we've been taking a probiotic

456
00:16:50,225 --> 00:16:50,725
since

457
00:16:51,578 --> 00:16:54,546
right before or right after my his direct

458
00:16:55,240 --> 00:16:55,294
here

459
00:16:56,770 --> 00:16:59,562
Just been couple of years now. We're the

460
00:16:59,562 --> 00:17:00,439
hell Been.

461
00:17:02,353 --> 00:17:03,412
I don't know

462
00:17:04,507 --> 00:17:06,614
most certainly we've been taking a probiotic

463
00:17:07,146 --> 00:17:08,576
longer than 3 months.

464
00:17:11,516 --> 00:17:12,310
Oh, I.

465
00:17:15,737 --> 00:17:18,118
Okay. I am just gonna go sit quietly

466
00:17:18,118 --> 00:17:18,991
in the corner now.

467
00:17:20,279 --> 00:17:22,440
You'll look very handsome while you do it.

468
00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:27,000
I think the 1 you're thinking of.

469
00:17:27,734 --> 00:17:28,853
Is the 1 that we...

470
00:17:31,170 --> 00:17:33,807
I guess in a weird weird way. We

471
00:17:33,807 --> 00:17:36,855
kind of negotiated it, but not in the...

472
00:17:37,094 --> 00:17:38,763
We work very clear on our role here.

473
00:17:39,002 --> 00:17:39,479
And that.

474
00:17:40,036 --> 00:17:40,854
Stinky breakfast

475
00:17:41,785 --> 00:17:43,637
I now I have to explain more

476
00:17:44,171 --> 00:17:46,345
Scott explain what his stinky breakfast is.

477
00:17:47,065 --> 00:17:50,664
Okay. So first, what what happened was, we

478
00:17:50,664 --> 00:17:53,307
had been making our breakfast. Separate every morning

479
00:17:53,307 --> 00:17:54,575
regardless of what we ate. Yeah.

480
00:17:55,367 --> 00:17:56,952
And at some point over the past couple

481
00:17:56,952 --> 00:17:58,299
of months, this has been a couple of

482
00:17:58,299 --> 00:17:58,537
months.

483
00:17:59,503 --> 00:18:00,638
I started coordinating

484
00:18:01,090 --> 00:18:03,550
on the days that I wanted. Yes, I'll

485
00:18:03,550 --> 00:18:05,057
explain it. Stinky breakfast.

486
00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:08,258
I was like, why don't I just make

487
00:18:08,258 --> 00:18:10,016
it for Jb? Like, this doesn't make sense

488
00:18:10,016 --> 00:18:12,013
for us to waiting in line because we

489
00:18:12,013 --> 00:18:13,612
use the air fryer, and it's like, we're

490
00:18:13,612 --> 00:18:14,730
waiting in line to eat breakfast.

491
00:18:15,704 --> 00:18:17,539
So I started making if I was gonna

492
00:18:17,539 --> 00:18:20,011
eat stinky breakfast, I would make Jb stinky

493
00:18:20,011 --> 00:18:20,511
breakfast.

494
00:18:22,484 --> 00:18:23,680
It's so weird when you have to, like,

495
00:18:23,919 --> 00:18:25,569
say the language of your relationship

496
00:18:26,405 --> 00:18:28,473
in front of people. So let me explain

497
00:18:28,473 --> 00:18:29,530
real quick what

498
00:18:30,223 --> 00:18:32,234
what a stinky breakfast is

499
00:18:33,575 --> 00:18:33,813
k.

500
00:18:35,319 --> 00:18:37,379
Stinky breakfast is, you start with an air

501
00:18:37,379 --> 00:18:38,885
fryer and you get a tortilla.

502
00:18:39,281 --> 00:18:40,049
We get the brewery

503
00:18:40,961 --> 00:18:41,992
Yeah the big big ones.

504
00:18:42,627 --> 00:18:44,475
And you put that inside

505
00:18:46,275 --> 00:18:48,512
the air fryer basket. You kinda like like,

506
00:18:48,592 --> 00:18:50,504
it's a little bowl. Yeah. Like you... It...

507
00:18:50,902 --> 00:18:52,496
The sides come up and it forms like

508
00:18:52,496 --> 00:18:55,099
a little bowl in there. Then you'd... Like

509
00:18:55,778 --> 00:18:58,575
you can either scramble your eggs. I like

510
00:18:58,575 --> 00:19:00,731
them scrambled. I just crack kale cracks them

511
00:19:00,731 --> 00:19:01,930
and just drop them right in.

512
00:19:02,584 --> 00:19:04,499
And then sprinkle some cheese. You can do

513
00:19:04,579 --> 00:19:06,175
Ham. You can do whatever Wanna put ham

514
00:19:06,175 --> 00:19:08,171
in there, put cheese like a like a

515
00:19:08,171 --> 00:19:10,725
omelette on a burrito. Yeah. Open face stomp?

516
00:19:11,059 --> 00:19:13,799
Yeah kind of. And and you

517
00:19:14,580 --> 00:19:16,580
cook the air fryer. Cook near fryer. The

518
00:19:16,740 --> 00:19:18,660
Internet taught us that. I I found that

519
00:19:18,660 --> 00:19:20,993
recipe on on the What on the Internet,

520
00:19:21,233 --> 00:19:21,733
and

521
00:19:22,831 --> 00:19:25,149
else. Yeah. So the reason it's called stinky

522
00:19:25,149 --> 00:19:28,265
breakfast though that's the breakfast. Yeah. The 14

523
00:19:28,265 --> 00:19:30,512
year old. 1 for a time there was

524
00:19:30,512 --> 00:19:33,142
waking up or was already awake at... We're

525
00:19:33,142 --> 00:19:35,213
eating breakfast y'all between 06:30 and 7 in

526
00:19:35,213 --> 00:19:37,523
the morning. That's what We. And for different

527
00:19:37,523 --> 00:19:40,085
reasons, he would be awake or just waking

528
00:19:40,085 --> 00:19:41,915
up at around that time for a while.

529
00:19:42,551 --> 00:19:43,051
And

530
00:19:43,506 --> 00:19:45,119
I don't know how

531
00:19:45,495 --> 00:19:48,375
he's genetically my child. Or how he was

532
00:19:48,375 --> 00:19:50,947
raised by Jb. But that child

533
00:19:51,483 --> 00:19:54,352
hates cheese. Hates everything about it including the

534
00:19:54,352 --> 00:19:57,077
smell, health So he started. We didn't realize

535
00:19:57,077 --> 00:19:58,273
this till finally told us,

536
00:19:58,990 --> 00:20:01,222
and he started hiding away in his room

537
00:20:01,222 --> 00:20:03,215
and giving us, like sit on and make

538
00:20:03,215 --> 00:20:04,898
a money faces, and he was like, your

539
00:20:04,898 --> 00:20:05,398
breakfast

540
00:20:05,771 --> 00:20:07,144
stinks, and so

541
00:20:07,517 --> 00:20:09,580
because we... The 2 of us Jb and

542
00:20:09,580 --> 00:20:11,265
myself are a bunch of fucking winning weirdo

543
00:20:11,265 --> 00:20:12,804
house, we just started calling

544
00:20:13,105 --> 00:20:14,065
thank breakfast.

545
00:20:15,184 --> 00:20:17,105
And we... If the 14 year old is

546
00:20:17,105 --> 00:20:18,877
awake at that time, and we weirdo what

547
00:20:18,877 --> 00:20:20,869
1 or both of us want stinky breakfast

548
00:20:20,869 --> 00:20:21,347
that morning.

549
00:20:22,064 --> 00:20:23,896
We warn him, hey, we're closing your door

550
00:20:23,896 --> 00:20:25,250
because it's stinky breakfast the morning.

551
00:20:27,100 --> 00:20:28,854
So now you get an insight into our

552
00:20:28,854 --> 00:20:29,971
weird little life room. Okay.

553
00:20:30,689 --> 00:20:31,189
So

554
00:20:31,885 --> 00:20:34,517
out of a need for efficiency because I

555
00:20:34,517 --> 00:20:36,127
was tired to wait in turn because y'all

556
00:20:36,127 --> 00:20:37,962
know. I was gonna let Jb go ahead

557
00:20:37,962 --> 00:20:40,434
of me in line for something. Right? Including

558
00:20:40,434 --> 00:20:41,950
the use of the air fryer. Yeah.

559
00:20:42,748 --> 00:20:44,981
So I was tired waiting for my own

560
00:20:44,981 --> 00:20:47,169
damn based. And I started offering

561
00:20:47,625 --> 00:20:50,493
to make his stinky breakfast when I made

562
00:20:50,493 --> 00:20:52,246
my... Because we have an air fryer with

563
00:20:52,246 --> 00:20:54,635
dual dual. We can make. Yeah. 2 things

564
00:20:54,635 --> 00:20:54,795
I went.

565
00:20:56,083 --> 00:20:58,970
So it became this thing where 4

566
00:20:59,823 --> 00:21:00,221
weeks.

567
00:21:00,857 --> 00:21:03,099
Any day I was gonna have stinky breakfast.

568
00:21:03,258 --> 00:21:05,322
The question was do you want stinky breakfast.

569
00:21:05,799 --> 00:21:08,499
And in in 1 way, it wasn't task

570
00:21:08,499 --> 00:21:11,198
creep because every day for a while I

571
00:21:11,198 --> 00:21:13,704
asked. Right? And finally,

572
00:21:14,081 --> 00:21:15,277
I realized what I was doing it. I

573
00:21:15,277 --> 00:21:16,871
was just doing it. I was always asking,

574
00:21:17,110 --> 00:21:18,385
but I was just doing it. And I

575
00:21:18,385 --> 00:21:19,980
went, I'm tired to fucking ask it.

576
00:21:21,353 --> 00:21:23,750
Let's just... Let's set a rule? Am I?

577
00:21:23,990 --> 00:21:25,907
You know, would Jb prefer for me to

578
00:21:25,907 --> 00:21:26,387
ask?

579
00:21:27,186 --> 00:21:29,277
Or can we just 3 that on the

580
00:21:29,277 --> 00:21:31,669
days that we both want stinky breakfast, God,

581
00:21:31,909 --> 00:21:33,185
How many times can I say that?

582
00:21:34,222 --> 00:21:35,817
Should made that a drinking game? You know,

583
00:21:35,976 --> 00:21:36,933
am I gonna be the winner to make

584
00:21:36,933 --> 00:21:39,423
it? And that... Yeah. It's still never been

585
00:21:39,423 --> 00:21:41,820
like, what I think most people would consider,

586
00:21:41,900 --> 00:21:43,279
like, a power exchange

587
00:21:43,658 --> 00:21:45,176
negotiation where Mh. Hi. I'm The dom dome,

588
00:21:45,256 --> 00:21:46,549
and I'm gonna tell you the sub, I

589
00:21:46,549 --> 00:21:47,668
want you to do this and me, the

590
00:21:47,668 --> 00:21:49,266
sub is gonna go, let me think about...

591
00:21:49,506 --> 00:21:51,344
Okay. You know, whatever whatever. I don't know

592
00:21:51,344 --> 00:21:53,741
why imaginary me talks at life, whatever.

593
00:21:54,860 --> 00:21:57,770
Through This was just an in the moment

594
00:21:57,829 --> 00:21:58,329
thing

595
00:21:59,346 --> 00:22:00,942
where I've been doing it.

596
00:22:01,740 --> 00:22:03,257
I was tired of having to ask every

597
00:22:03,257 --> 00:22:03,816
fucking time.

598
00:22:04,709 --> 00:22:08,381
We just handled it. Now, I want to

599
00:22:08,381 --> 00:22:10,296
remind people because I think this can get

600
00:22:10,296 --> 00:22:10,796
forgotten

601
00:22:11,733 --> 00:22:14,718
that a task we in our power exchange

602
00:22:15,093 --> 00:22:18,137
can be literally anything. Mh. And is only

603
00:22:18,512 --> 00:22:22,026
a power exchange task air quote that if

604
00:22:22,026 --> 00:22:25,605
we assign that meaning to it. So you

605
00:22:25,605 --> 00:22:27,355
can do something for your partner as a

606
00:22:27,355 --> 00:22:29,122
sub or a dom, and it not be

607
00:22:29,122 --> 00:22:30,718
part of your power. You just do it

608
00:22:30,718 --> 00:22:32,394
because you're the the best 1 to do

609
00:22:32,394 --> 00:22:34,149
it. You want to do it for them,

610
00:22:34,468 --> 00:22:37,346
whatever whatever. And it... You can still negotiate

611
00:22:37,346 --> 00:22:39,090
that like, you negotiate anything else,

612
00:22:39,882 --> 00:22:42,974
But it doesn't necessarily have to be part

613
00:22:42,974 --> 00:22:46,105
of your... Power exchange because it's only my

614
00:22:46,105 --> 00:22:47,085
submissive task

615
00:22:47,545 --> 00:22:48,045
thing

616
00:22:48,585 --> 00:22:51,325
because it gives me the feels being,

617
00:22:51,625 --> 00:22:53,955
you know, submissive or because in my mind,

618
00:22:54,194 --> 00:22:56,185
I'm doing this for my daddy dom. Right?

619
00:22:56,903 --> 00:22:59,771
It's like the like the breakfast thing, that

620
00:22:59,771 --> 00:23:01,922
started out as efficiency. I was just fucking

621
00:23:01,922 --> 00:23:04,953
tired asking. But if I'm going to agree

622
00:23:04,953 --> 00:23:07,039
to do something for Jb

623
00:23:07,809 --> 00:23:09,474
on a consistent basis and I take that

624
00:23:09,474 --> 00:23:10,919
on and make that part of my teen.

625
00:23:11,477 --> 00:23:12,355
For me,

626
00:23:13,393 --> 00:23:14,371
that becomes

627
00:23:14,909 --> 00:23:17,303
part of the things I do as you're

628
00:23:17,303 --> 00:23:18,021
submissive. Yeah.

629
00:23:18,994 --> 00:23:19,494
And,

630
00:23:20,033 --> 00:23:21,891
you know, I will say too

631
00:23:23,069 --> 00:23:24,108
I'm not gonna say I do it all

632
00:23:24,108 --> 00:23:25,306
the time, but I try to do it.

633
00:23:26,345 --> 00:23:28,753
Good poor of the time, you know, because

634
00:23:28,753 --> 00:23:30,529
it was something that wasn't

635
00:23:31,464 --> 00:23:32,682
kinda negotiated

636
00:23:33,298 --> 00:23:35,712
between us, you know, while, while your

637
00:23:38,181 --> 00:23:38,681
creating

638
00:23:39,460 --> 00:23:40,418
the stinky breakfast.

639
00:23:42,735 --> 00:23:44,585
I kinda come behind you you're like, okay.

640
00:23:44,744 --> 00:23:46,498
You done with this? I'll put this away

641
00:23:46,498 --> 00:23:48,412
just... So can I tell you about that

642
00:23:48,412 --> 00:23:51,043
in this? So I don't know that you

643
00:23:51,043 --> 00:23:52,913
would consider a task creep

644
00:23:53,768 --> 00:23:55,839
or something we need to negotiate because I

645
00:23:55,839 --> 00:23:57,035
don't know if it hits you when the

646
00:23:57,035 --> 00:23:59,266
dom feels. Okay? So I don't wanna... Yeah.

647
00:23:59,584 --> 00:24:00,859
I don't wanna assign meaning when there is

648
00:24:00,859 --> 00:24:02,468
a. But here's what I can tell you

649
00:24:02,468 --> 00:24:02,787
about this.

650
00:24:04,622 --> 00:24:06,137
We do that with any meal. If 1

651
00:24:06,137 --> 00:24:08,849
of us is cooking in general. The other

652
00:24:08,849 --> 00:24:10,763
1 of us is setting the table, getting

653
00:24:10,763 --> 00:24:11,641
drinks, whatever whenever.

654
00:24:12,531 --> 00:24:13,485
That being said.

655
00:24:15,233 --> 00:24:16,585
I know this has happened to me when

656
00:24:16,744 --> 00:24:18,016
I've been cooking, and I'm sure I've done

657
00:24:18,016 --> 00:24:19,287
it to Jb. I just don't know how

658
00:24:19,287 --> 00:24:19,844
you feel about it.

659
00:24:20,718 --> 00:24:23,988
If they're... A day, a time. Breakfast lunch

660
00:24:23,988 --> 00:24:25,019
dinner, I don't care,

661
00:24:26,210 --> 00:24:27,186
where the

662
00:24:27,718 --> 00:24:28,218
unspoken

663
00:24:28,591 --> 00:24:31,233
expects tension is he will set the table.

664
00:24:31,710 --> 00:24:32,586
While, I'm cooking,

665
00:24:33,541 --> 00:24:35,532
and he gets distracted, and he does not

666
00:24:35,532 --> 00:24:39,230
do it. I am... So annoyed. I immediately

667
00:24:39,446 --> 00:24:39,946
become

668
00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:43,344
a mid evil peasant woman who has to

669
00:24:43,344 --> 00:24:46,943
do everything. I immediately become a single mom

670
00:24:46,943 --> 00:24:49,820
with 2 jobs who loves her kids,

671
00:24:50,460 --> 00:24:52,617
and, you know, can't make, like, like, my

672
00:24:52,617 --> 00:24:54,396
life before marriage. Like, I immediately

673
00:24:54,775 --> 00:24:57,507
think. I'm the most put upon human being.

674
00:24:58,146 --> 00:25:01,262
Right, who has ever fucking lived. Why? Because

675
00:25:01,262 --> 00:25:01,762
my

676
00:25:02,460 --> 00:25:02,960
expectation

677
00:25:03,353 --> 00:25:05,902
of the thing that he typically does what

678
00:25:05,902 --> 00:25:08,291
we don't have as a hard and fast

679
00:25:08,291 --> 00:25:08,610
role.

680
00:25:10,202 --> 00:25:11,397
Is not being done. I'm like,

681
00:25:12,369 --> 00:25:14,764
I have to do everything around here. That's

682
00:25:14,764 --> 00:25:16,621
not fucking true. At.

683
00:25:17,319 --> 00:25:20,113
The moment he shows up to do the

684
00:25:20,113 --> 00:25:21,710
thing. I calm the fuck down.

685
00:25:22,364 --> 00:25:24,282
My favorite. My favorite is when I do

686
00:25:24,282 --> 00:25:26,519
the superhuman thing of, I'm cooking,

687
00:25:27,079 --> 00:25:28,757
and I set the table, get the drinks

688
00:25:28,757 --> 00:25:30,036
put the condiments out do the whole thing,

689
00:25:30,196 --> 00:25:32,205
and he walks and goes, Oh, you got

690
00:25:32,205 --> 00:25:34,036
it done, and then I ba in the

691
00:25:34,036 --> 00:25:36,208
glory that I am clearly superhuman,

692
00:25:36,823 --> 00:25:38,096
and I can do it

693
00:25:42,326 --> 00:25:43,836
So what do you need me for? Nope.

694
00:25:44,154 --> 00:25:47,348
Nope. To prevent that initial annoy. That's it

695
00:25:47,348 --> 00:25:47,428
is.

696
00:25:48,382 --> 00:25:50,368
But it, you know, is that a thing

697
00:25:50,368 --> 00:25:51,266
that in any

698
00:25:51,640 --> 00:25:53,548
relationship you should talk about so that you

699
00:25:53,548 --> 00:25:55,138
don't have resentment and everybody kind of.

700
00:25:55,932 --> 00:25:58,652
Understands what the expectations are. Absolutely.

701
00:25:59,129 --> 00:26:02,174
Is that task creep? I don't think so

702
00:26:02,311 --> 00:26:05,515
unless you've... Feel it within the power sharing.

703
00:26:05,754 --> 00:26:07,372
Right? Like, it's a thing

704
00:26:08,149 --> 00:26:10,325
that you're agreeing to do primarily

705
00:26:10,863 --> 00:26:13,111
because you're my daddy doll and this is

706
00:26:13,111 --> 00:26:15,022
part of the control and the whatever, not

707
00:26:15,022 --> 00:26:16,239
as I am

708
00:26:17,013 --> 00:26:19,243
a grown ass adult partner living in this

709
00:26:19,243 --> 00:26:20,597
house with you and we gotta make it

710
00:26:20,597 --> 00:26:23,244
run together like... Yeah. I think I think

711
00:26:23,404 --> 00:26:24,622
Task creep can

712
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:26,356
occur outside of power range.

713
00:26:26,995 --> 00:26:30,124
As somebody who was vanilla or for a

714
00:26:30,124 --> 00:26:31,263
very long time ended

715
00:26:31,802 --> 00:26:33,421
way more than my share

716
00:26:34,039 --> 00:26:36,677
of the the household work. Abs are fucking

717
00:26:36,677 --> 00:26:39,960
loot. But within power change. I think it's

718
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:42,103
about what does it mean to the power.

719
00:26:42,341 --> 00:26:44,802
I think the conversation is different is what

720
00:26:44,881 --> 00:26:47,124
I'm trying to say. The and I have

721
00:26:47,124 --> 00:26:48,583
with you is your submissive

722
00:26:49,122 --> 00:26:51,039
who is, you know, wants to be told

723
00:26:51,039 --> 00:26:52,718
by her Daddy dom, what she needs to

724
00:26:52,718 --> 00:26:55,535
be doing. Right? Mh. Is different.

725
00:26:56,885 --> 00:26:58,500
Though maybe it's a subtle difference

726
00:26:59,275 --> 00:27:01,824
from the life partner and wife who just

727
00:27:01,824 --> 00:27:04,467
wants the household to run efficiently and to

728
00:27:04,467 --> 00:27:06,320
know what the to manage

729
00:27:06,695 --> 00:27:08,844
expectations for everybody. To kinda know is this

730
00:27:08,844 --> 00:27:10,140
a rule of our household,

731
00:27:10,675 --> 00:27:13,236
is this a rule within our relation shit.

732
00:27:13,792 --> 00:27:14,984
I think that's what goes back to where

733
00:27:15,063 --> 00:27:17,606
We're was saying, not every task is task

734
00:27:17,606 --> 00:27:20,228
creep. It's not every task is automatically part

735
00:27:20,228 --> 00:27:22,630
of your power exchange, like It only has

736
00:27:22,630 --> 00:27:24,304
meaning if you assign meaning to it. You

737
00:27:24,304 --> 00:27:26,456
know what I mean? And setting of the

738
00:27:26,456 --> 00:27:28,231
table is an a an

739
00:27:28,847 --> 00:27:29,347
equitable

740
00:27:29,659 --> 00:27:31,327
kind of thing we both do it to

741
00:27:31,327 --> 00:27:33,393
the best of our ability. Yeah, I don't

742
00:27:33,393 --> 00:27:35,777
do it because I'm submissive. I think is

743
00:27:35,777 --> 00:27:36,731
what I'm trying.

744
00:27:37,144 --> 00:27:40,260
To say. Gotcha. Am I everything I think

745
00:27:40,260 --> 00:27:42,358
so. Yeah. So

746
00:27:42,977 --> 00:27:44,950
that's been so far

747
00:27:45,627 --> 00:27:47,141
my personal service,

748
00:27:48,017 --> 00:27:49,212
sickness submissive. Mh.

749
00:27:49,770 --> 00:27:53,215
Experience with the idea of tax Creek. Mh.

750
00:27:54,015 --> 00:27:55,535
From a dominant perspective,

751
00:27:56,575 --> 00:27:58,494
do you feel like you have experienced this

752
00:27:58,494 --> 00:27:58,994
where

753
00:27:59,855 --> 00:28:01,566
mine aura another person's

754
00:28:02,335 --> 00:28:03,469
expectations of you

755
00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:05,293
of what you'll

756
00:28:05,824 --> 00:28:07,592
do as the dom

757
00:28:08,774 --> 00:28:10,532
changed because you took on something, but we

758
00:28:10,532 --> 00:28:12,209
didn't talk about it, and now you've created

759
00:28:12,209 --> 00:28:13,008
that expectation,

760
00:28:13,727 --> 00:28:17,432
or you did something 1 time, and now

761
00:28:17,886 --> 00:28:18,545
there's this

762
00:28:18,920 --> 00:28:21,783
it's expectation yeah. Right. Right. Right right. I

763
00:28:21,862 --> 00:28:23,850
I cannot think of anything off the top.

764
00:28:24,024 --> 00:28:25,718
Of my head. And,

765
00:28:26,253 --> 00:28:27,549
I wanna... The

766
00:28:28,084 --> 00:28:29,437
I wanna put it out there as a

767
00:28:29,437 --> 00:28:30,790
as a thing that can happen because I

768
00:28:30,790 --> 00:28:32,318
have no doubt that it can happen. But

769
00:28:32,398 --> 00:28:34,389
I also think it's... It may be less

770
00:28:34,389 --> 00:28:38,155
common in power exchange dynamics specifically because

771
00:28:38,849 --> 00:28:39,964
most of the time?

772
00:28:40,522 --> 00:28:40,761
No,

773
00:28:41,333 --> 00:28:43,320
Or many times? No more times than not.

774
00:28:43,717 --> 00:28:45,147
As a I'm gonna come to you and

775
00:28:45,147 --> 00:28:47,054
ask. Yeah. Right? Or you're gonna come to

776
00:28:47,054 --> 00:28:49,890
me and offer or ask me can can

777
00:28:50,009 --> 00:28:51,600
you know, you okay if I do this.

778
00:28:51,839 --> 00:28:54,488
And the opportunity for negotiation is

779
00:28:55,738 --> 00:28:58,778
there in a more clear, you way most

780
00:28:58,778 --> 00:29:01,087
of the time. Mh. Because if I ask

781
00:29:01,087 --> 00:29:02,999
you to do something for me. Right? Yeah.

782
00:29:03,317 --> 00:29:04,830
You can just tell me no if you

783
00:29:04,830 --> 00:29:05,945
don't wanna do it. Right?

784
00:29:07,079 --> 00:29:07,819
That doesn't

785
00:29:08,119 --> 00:29:10,599
mean that somebody can't feel a dominant can't

786
00:29:10,599 --> 00:29:12,539
feel an obligation to do a thing

787
00:29:12,919 --> 00:29:15,328
because they did it. Months before twice before

788
00:29:15,328 --> 00:29:17,399
done before. And that I think is the

789
00:29:17,399 --> 00:29:18,298
thing I want

790
00:29:19,311 --> 00:29:21,302
people of either side of the slash to

791
00:29:21,302 --> 00:29:22,679
realize it's that

792
00:29:23,548 --> 00:29:26,281
until you've negotiated it. The only

793
00:29:26,658 --> 00:29:27,876
obligation you

794
00:29:28,971 --> 00:29:31,943
ought to feel and mh. Air quote that

795
00:29:32,241 --> 00:29:34,249
is do you want to do it for

796
00:29:34,249 --> 00:29:37,062
your partner? And and I I think here's

797
00:29:37,599 --> 00:29:39,114
kind of an idea of that.

798
00:29:42,556 --> 00:29:44,775
Because, you know, we've... We've been having to

799
00:29:44,775 --> 00:29:45,275
do

800
00:29:46,282 --> 00:29:47,099
some shifting

801
00:29:48,501 --> 00:29:49,691
here around the house.

802
00:29:51,138 --> 00:29:51,797
Because of

803
00:29:52,730 --> 00:29:54,662
a lot of things going on. Mh

804
00:29:55,356 --> 00:29:56,811
you know, working with the

805
00:29:57,187 --> 00:29:59,256
the youngest health and trying to get them

806
00:29:59,256 --> 00:29:59,630
through

807
00:30:00,148 --> 00:30:02,143
school and... I can't wait till eighth grades

808
00:30:02,143 --> 00:30:04,218
officially over our home school child. You know.

809
00:30:04,298 --> 00:30:05,096
It's getting closer.

810
00:30:05,974 --> 00:30:07,432
I can see the end. I just wanna

811
00:30:08,303 --> 00:30:10,059
grab him and drag across the finish line,

812
00:30:10,218 --> 00:30:11,336
you know. But

813
00:30:12,054 --> 00:30:12,692
but anyway,

814
00:30:13,889 --> 00:30:15,485
you know, and and in between all that,

815
00:30:16,536 --> 00:30:18,687
she's trying to pull in some some, you

816
00:30:18,687 --> 00:30:19,643
know, extra writing.

817
00:30:20,599 --> 00:30:21,099
And,

818
00:30:21,555 --> 00:30:24,126
you know, we didn't really talk about it

819
00:30:24,183 --> 00:30:26,511
per s, but you know, I kinda started

820
00:30:26,511 --> 00:30:28,507
taking over the full load of of doing

821
00:30:28,507 --> 00:30:30,423
all the laundry again. Oh, my god. The

822
00:30:30,423 --> 00:30:32,338
couple of times. So this is what's funny

823
00:30:32,338 --> 00:30:34,429
about that's speaking of this topic. A few

824
00:30:34,429 --> 00:30:36,267
times you did that for me, where our

825
00:30:36,267 --> 00:30:36,767
current

826
00:30:37,146 --> 00:30:37,646
negotiated

827
00:30:38,184 --> 00:30:41,381
process is Jb b washes and dries, he

828
00:30:41,381 --> 00:30:43,950
gets it out of the drive all because

829
00:30:44,030 --> 00:30:45,546
I know me. I can get it in

830
00:30:45,546 --> 00:30:47,780
the washer and the dryer, I'll forget all

831
00:30:47,780 --> 00:30:50,447
the fuck about it. It exists yeah. He

832
00:30:50,661 --> 00:30:52,724
did laundry the full thing for so long

833
00:30:52,724 --> 00:30:54,097
when my freelance writing

834
00:30:54,629 --> 00:30:55,978
went through the fuck roof for a couple

835
00:30:55,978 --> 00:30:56,533
of years there.

836
00:30:57,183 --> 00:30:59,410
He burned out. So we renegotiate a few

837
00:30:59,410 --> 00:31:01,478
years ago, split the difference, went with our...

838
00:31:01,637 --> 00:31:03,227
What we're willing to do our strengths and

839
00:31:03,307 --> 00:31:05,868
Right doesn't overwhelm us. Okay. Fine. What we

840
00:31:05,868 --> 00:31:07,622
will do for each other as a nice

841
00:31:07,622 --> 00:31:09,616
thing is sometimes we will do the other

842
00:31:09,616 --> 00:31:12,807
person's side. My mother's day gift this year

843
00:31:12,807 --> 00:31:14,641
among many things that were done for me.

844
00:31:15,294 --> 00:31:16,967
Very service oriented for both Mother's day and

845
00:31:17,047 --> 00:31:18,879
Father's Day days He did all the the

846
00:31:18,879 --> 00:31:20,074
laundry for me, so I didn't have to

847
00:31:20,074 --> 00:31:21,509
do. Right? Mh. He made sure I'd have

848
00:31:21,509 --> 00:31:23,182
to wash a dish. I'm... The things I

849
00:31:23,182 --> 00:31:24,457
just do to help the household brand.

850
00:31:25,268 --> 00:31:27,099
For Father's day. I did the same thing.

851
00:31:27,337 --> 00:31:28,076
I did

852
00:31:28,531 --> 00:31:30,282
all of the laundry, so he didn't have

853
00:31:30,282 --> 00:31:33,068
to. Right? Mh. Okay. Fine. So what that

854
00:31:33,068 --> 00:31:34,444
means is that sometimes

855
00:31:34,994 --> 00:31:37,091
we'll do the other person's half

856
00:31:38,028 --> 00:31:39,863
because we're being nice and we see that

857
00:31:39,863 --> 00:31:41,779
they could use the help or they're busy

858
00:31:41,779 --> 00:31:44,428
or they're tired or yeah. Whatever. Right. But

859
00:31:44,428 --> 00:31:45,247
we've never

860
00:31:46,103 --> 00:31:48,098
negotiated that we will do that. It's just

861
00:31:48,098 --> 00:31:49,693
the thing we do if we too have

862
00:31:49,693 --> 00:31:52,739
the energy. Mh. Right So those few times

863
00:31:52,739 --> 00:31:55,631
you did it, it was such a delightful

864
00:31:55,929 --> 00:31:56,407
surprise.

865
00:31:56,806 --> 00:31:59,198
Now. I don't know if this is my

866
00:31:59,198 --> 00:32:01,389
people pleasing with. I don't know

867
00:32:02,327 --> 00:32:04,565
if it is my service submission. I don't

868
00:32:04,565 --> 00:32:05,204
maybe it's both.

869
00:32:06,402 --> 00:32:07,701
I often

870
00:32:08,480 --> 00:32:09,953
feels... So guilty

871
00:32:10,569 --> 00:32:12,723
because what I think is that's my job

872
00:32:12,723 --> 00:32:13,122
to do.

873
00:32:13,760 --> 00:32:14,478
And I,

874
00:32:16,631 --> 00:32:17,748
I can't think of the word I want,

875
00:32:17,907 --> 00:32:20,554
but, like, over achieve from hell with

876
00:32:21,751 --> 00:32:23,027
expectations that don't match reality,

877
00:32:23,825 --> 00:32:25,739
think that I should be able to do

878
00:32:25,739 --> 00:32:27,733
all the things all the time,

879
00:32:28,211 --> 00:32:28,610
whatever.

880
00:32:29,584 --> 00:32:31,282
I've been with you long enough

881
00:32:31,981 --> 00:32:34,718
that I don't let that feeling sort of

882
00:32:36,295 --> 00:32:38,708
overwhelmed. Right. I've I have the temporary. Oh,

883
00:32:38,867 --> 00:32:40,146
I should've have done it. And then I've

884
00:32:40,146 --> 00:32:41,824
gotten better at going Oh, but thing fuck.

885
00:32:41,984 --> 00:32:42,943
I don't have to do it.

886
00:32:43,742 --> 00:32:45,101
But that's 1 of those things where it's

887
00:32:45,101 --> 00:32:47,353
a nice do and we know that the

888
00:32:47,353 --> 00:32:49,910
other will do it. We also know that

889
00:32:49,910 --> 00:32:50,390
in a

890
00:32:51,748 --> 00:32:53,107
in a real bad moment, 1 of us

891
00:32:53,107 --> 00:32:54,146
could go to the other and go, I

892
00:32:54,146 --> 00:32:56,074
just I just can't this week can you

893
00:32:56,074 --> 00:32:58,061
help me out. So I don't feel like

894
00:32:58,061 --> 00:33:01,104
that would be something to negotiate because we're

895
00:33:01,557 --> 00:33:03,782
not we're not trying to take on the

896
00:33:03,782 --> 00:33:05,567
task we're trying to,

897
00:33:05,940 --> 00:33:09,111
in a pleasant surprise kind of way, acknowledge

898
00:33:09,111 --> 00:33:11,094
that the other person could use a break.

899
00:33:11,332 --> 00:33:11,570
You know?

900
00:33:12,779 --> 00:33:15,420
And then we do that once or twice,

901
00:33:15,820 --> 00:33:17,660
and then we get back on track because

902
00:33:17,660 --> 00:33:19,660
the person got their break. And then we

903
00:33:19,660 --> 00:33:21,668
go until the in that 1 is more

904
00:33:21,668 --> 00:33:23,895
of a... We're just ob ob observe of

905
00:33:23,895 --> 00:33:25,009
each other. Mh.

906
00:33:25,566 --> 00:33:26,759
And so I and I don't...

907
00:33:28,285 --> 00:33:31,623
The way we used our power exchange communication

908
00:33:31,623 --> 00:33:32,520
skills at

909
00:33:32,974 --> 00:33:35,223
negotiation to negotiate the

910
00:33:35,835 --> 00:33:40,224
divide of household tasks, but none very little

911
00:33:40,224 --> 00:33:41,361
of that is

912
00:33:42,133 --> 00:33:44,201
about Power exchange because it's about the household,

913
00:33:44,360 --> 00:33:47,008
how we as 2 adults living in the

914
00:33:47,008 --> 00:33:49,725
household, keep it running. That's not about our

915
00:33:49,725 --> 00:33:53,401
power exchange. Because, while, yes, there absolutely plenty

916
00:33:53,401 --> 00:33:54,380
of power exchange

917
00:33:55,093 --> 00:33:58,624
relationships where the domestic tasks are the submissive

918
00:33:58,682 --> 00:34:00,915
tasks. That's not how we roll around here.

919
00:34:01,474 --> 00:34:03,170
My submissive tasks

920
00:34:03,787 --> 00:34:04,559
in general

921
00:34:05,156 --> 00:34:07,862
are in direct service of Jb and they

922
00:34:07,862 --> 00:34:09,215
benefit nobody but Jb.

923
00:34:10,250 --> 00:34:12,319
If it's to keep the house running, so

924
00:34:12,319 --> 00:34:14,643
we don't think, and we're not dirty?

925
00:34:15,921 --> 00:34:17,278
That to me is not a submissive task.

926
00:34:17,517 --> 00:34:19,832
Yeah. That's a... I'm a adult who has

927
00:34:19,832 --> 00:34:21,429
to make it through this crazy life task.

928
00:34:21,988 --> 00:34:24,317
That's a... I don't want my house to

929
00:34:24,317 --> 00:34:26,552
get condemned because I didn't take care of

930
00:34:26,552 --> 00:34:29,606
it. Right. Task. Right? And the

931
00:34:29,983 --> 00:34:32,494
negotiations, I think should still occur because household

932
00:34:32,554 --> 00:34:35,830
labor is labor, and everybody who is capable

933
00:34:35,830 --> 00:34:37,029
of participating opt to.

934
00:34:38,467 --> 00:34:41,185
But that... I think you can handle Task

935
00:34:41,185 --> 00:34:42,796
creep can still happen there,

936
00:34:43,514 --> 00:34:44,950
but that's to me outside of the scope

937
00:34:44,950 --> 00:34:47,663
of power exchange. Yeah. If that makes. Now

938
00:34:47,822 --> 00:34:48,641
I I

939
00:34:49,274 --> 00:34:51,512
have a little story to tell more funny

940
00:34:51,512 --> 00:34:53,590
than anything kinda goes along with this a

941
00:34:53,590 --> 00:34:55,348
little bit. Okay. No,

942
00:34:56,866 --> 00:34:57,766
you know, Kayla

943
00:34:58,305 --> 00:34:58,679
had

944
00:34:59,435 --> 00:35:01,664
taken on the task for me, which has

945
00:35:01,664 --> 00:35:05,165
has been a tremendous help of doing the

946
00:35:05,165 --> 00:35:07,889
resin pores for the resin light paddle. For

947
00:35:07,889 --> 00:35:09,665
the shop, the king for the shop.

948
00:35:10,920 --> 00:35:12,696
And and that has been a big

949
00:35:13,552 --> 00:35:16,039
boom for me. Mh. For that to to

950
00:35:16,039 --> 00:35:18,599
have happened. And also what she has been

951
00:35:18,599 --> 00:35:18,839
doing,

952
00:35:19,639 --> 00:35:21,099
it, you know, when the

953
00:35:23,159 --> 00:35:24,460
resin is all cured

954
00:35:24,920 --> 00:35:26,764
to it's very uneven.

955
00:35:28,435 --> 00:35:30,583
So she has taken on. I taught her

956
00:35:30,583 --> 00:35:32,588
how to run the drum sand because it's

957
00:35:32,588 --> 00:35:34,581
not a blade it's machinery, but I won't

958
00:35:34,581 --> 00:35:36,255
hurt myself too bad with it. No. You

959
00:35:36,255 --> 00:35:36,653
won't. Yeah.

960
00:35:37,451 --> 00:35:37,770
And

961
00:35:38,726 --> 00:35:40,775
she's she's been doing that initial

962
00:35:41,454 --> 00:35:42,414
sanding. Mh.

963
00:35:43,214 --> 00:35:45,375
So the other day, I was working out

964
00:35:45,375 --> 00:35:45,934
in the garage.

965
00:35:47,375 --> 00:35:49,795
I was gluing up knives. I was oil

966
00:35:50,348 --> 00:35:52,097
wood and and doing some other things, and

967
00:35:52,177 --> 00:35:54,801
I found myself having some time in between

968
00:35:54,801 --> 00:35:56,789
where I was a standard t my thumbs,

969
00:35:58,141 --> 00:35:59,652
and there was a stack of paddle.

970
00:36:00,703 --> 00:36:01,523
Over there

971
00:36:01,902 --> 00:36:04,298
ready to... Waiting to go through the sander.

972
00:36:05,097 --> 00:36:06,934
So all I was like, well, since I

973
00:36:06,934 --> 00:36:08,867
have be here, and I've got nothing else

974
00:36:08,867 --> 00:36:10,625
to do at the moment. Let me start

975
00:36:10,625 --> 00:36:11,923
running some of those

976
00:36:12,302 --> 00:36:14,235
through the sander. Look at her paste. Look

977
00:36:14,235 --> 00:36:15,454
at her podcast

978
00:36:16,074 --> 00:36:17,755
you you can't see it, but it... It's

979
00:36:17,755 --> 00:36:18,815
it's it's this

980
00:36:19,275 --> 00:36:20,494
look of horror

981
00:36:20,875 --> 00:36:23,927
on her face. Annoy, but it's fine. Annoy

982
00:36:23,927 --> 00:36:25,765
with love with a ting of love.

983
00:36:26,564 --> 00:36:28,801
So, you know, while I'm waiting for the

984
00:36:28,801 --> 00:36:31,052
glue to set up on the on On

985
00:36:31,052 --> 00:36:32,905
the knives I was gluing and to,

986
00:36:33,360 --> 00:36:35,827
you know, slaps sticks to soak up the

987
00:36:35,827 --> 00:36:38,454
oil and and be done. I'm I'm running

988
00:36:38,454 --> 00:36:40,618
this. She comes out to the garage. To

989
00:36:40,618 --> 00:36:41,494
ask me a question.

990
00:36:42,369 --> 00:36:44,440
She opens door steps out into the garage.

991
00:36:44,599 --> 00:36:46,987
She sees me at the drum sander. She

992
00:36:46,987 --> 00:36:50,430
just stopped dead in her tracks, her mouth

993
00:36:50,430 --> 00:36:51,946
dropped to the floor, She you would looked

994
00:36:51,946 --> 00:36:53,541
at me and was, like, what are you

995
00:36:53,541 --> 00:36:53,861
doing?

996
00:36:54,898 --> 00:36:57,546
She said a not... The submissive voice over?

997
00:36:57,945 --> 00:36:59,540
No. She did not. And it, you know,

998
00:36:59,700 --> 00:37:01,455
it's almost like it's the opposite of Task

999
00:37:01,615 --> 00:37:03,311
Creep. Yeah. Is the

1000
00:37:03,942 --> 00:37:05,686
you were doing... You were keeping yourself busy,

1001
00:37:05,844 --> 00:37:07,748
but you were doing me a favor. Yeah.

1002
00:37:08,224 --> 00:37:09,041
An I

1003
00:37:09,730 --> 00:37:10,627
am the rapidly

1004
00:37:10,999 --> 00:37:12,288
possessive control freak.

1005
00:37:13,405 --> 00:37:15,322
We've talked about that control issues. Yes. Missile

1006
00:37:15,322 --> 00:37:18,115
gonna have control issues who sees that as

1007
00:37:18,115 --> 00:37:21,402
my job. Again, not my submissive job. A

1008
00:37:21,402 --> 00:37:22,436
business job. Right?

1009
00:37:23,630 --> 00:37:24,130
And

1010
00:37:24,744 --> 00:37:25,244
I

1011
00:37:25,779 --> 00:37:28,087
I wanna say, it is a point of

1012
00:37:28,087 --> 00:37:29,319
growth and

1013
00:37:29,696 --> 00:37:30,196
maturation

1014
00:37:30,813 --> 00:37:34,482
that the initial thought I had of...

1015
00:37:35,040 --> 00:37:36,396
He's not gonna do it right. He's not

1016
00:37:36,396 --> 00:37:37,592
doing it its way. I do it. So

1017
00:37:37,592 --> 00:37:38,550
therefore it it's not the right way.

1018
00:37:39,438 --> 00:37:40,335
I did

1019
00:37:40,946 --> 00:37:42,161
shut that down

1020
00:37:42,613 --> 00:37:44,438
more quickly than you would realize or you

1021
00:37:44,438 --> 00:37:46,423
would want? I'm I'm glad I'm that seeing

1022
00:37:46,423 --> 00:37:47,867
as I was 1 who kind talk to

1023
00:37:47,867 --> 00:37:49,536
you how to do all this. That was

1024
00:37:49,536 --> 00:37:51,364
what I haven't tell myself I was like,

1025
00:37:52,317 --> 00:37:54,914
he knows it better than you. No. He's

1026
00:37:54,954 --> 00:37:55,675
the weather to tell you.

1027
00:37:56,715 --> 00:37:58,074
And I don't know what the...

1028
00:37:58,795 --> 00:38:00,474
I... Maybe it's just called being an un

1029
00:38:00,474 --> 00:38:01,434
uncomfortable little bitch.

1030
00:38:02,235 --> 00:38:04,085
Does it know how to... The accept help.

1031
00:38:04,244 --> 00:38:06,393
The mother... The scorpio bit from hell. But,

1032
00:38:06,473 --> 00:38:08,223
you know what? The way I that too.

1033
00:38:08,621 --> 00:38:09,099
The way...

1034
00:38:10,372 --> 00:38:12,815
And this might be just meat other people

1035
00:38:12,934 --> 00:38:14,921
me and nobody else may relate, but I'll

1036
00:38:14,921 --> 00:38:15,954
tell you from my perspective.

1037
00:38:16,909 --> 00:38:18,124
I think that

1038
00:38:18,657 --> 00:38:21,295
in a weird way is how me I

1039
00:38:21,295 --> 00:38:23,438
can let tasks creep up on me.

1040
00:38:24,550 --> 00:38:27,408
Because there's the control issues of I have

1041
00:38:27,408 --> 00:38:29,330
a way to do it, I know I

1042
00:38:29,330 --> 00:38:32,114
can get it done. Right. Just let me

1043
00:38:32,114 --> 00:38:32,512
do it.

1044
00:38:33,546 --> 00:38:34,523
Tied to

1045
00:38:35,137 --> 00:38:38,766
the... Deep, deep desire that I have to

1046
00:38:38,986 --> 00:38:40,504
take care of you do for you,

1047
00:38:41,143 --> 00:38:43,222
you know, make your life easier, all the

1048
00:38:43,222 --> 00:38:44,954
things that speak to me as a service

1049
00:38:45,074 --> 00:38:45,391
mess.

1050
00:38:46,980 --> 00:38:47,480
So

1051
00:38:48,012 --> 00:38:49,838
when I see a thing that needs to

1052
00:38:49,838 --> 00:38:51,982
be done in a moment. And I know

1053
00:38:51,982 --> 00:38:52,697
in that moment,

1054
00:38:53,253 --> 00:38:55,338
I can do it free you. Mh.

1055
00:38:55,978 --> 00:38:57,416
That's just me be a nice and I

1056
00:38:57,416 --> 00:38:58,695
just took on an extra thing and it's

1057
00:38:58,695 --> 00:39:01,352
fine. It becomes task creep

1058
00:39:01,811 --> 00:39:02,870
when I

1059
00:39:03,343 --> 00:39:05,814
slot it right into my routine, and I

1060
00:39:05,814 --> 00:39:08,523
start doing it, except we've never talked about

1061
00:39:08,523 --> 00:39:10,889
it. So 1, let's be clear here. I

1062
00:39:11,088 --> 00:39:12,524
don't know if he even wants me to

1063
00:39:12,524 --> 00:39:13,343
do it. Now

1064
00:39:13,720 --> 00:39:15,872
we have good communication skills. If I did

1065
00:39:15,872 --> 00:39:17,547
a little thing for him and he didn't

1066
00:39:17,547 --> 00:39:19,675
like me doing that. I'm a no. I

1067
00:39:19,875 --> 00:39:21,554
a know after maybe the first time. You

1068
00:39:21,554 --> 00:39:22,835
might let me slide the first time, I

1069
00:39:22,835 --> 00:39:23,954
do it. The second time you're gonna be

1070
00:39:23,954 --> 00:39:25,315
like, I did not ask you to do

1071
00:39:25,315 --> 00:39:26,355
this. Please Don't do this. Right.

1072
00:39:27,074 --> 00:39:29,646
But in general, if it benefits you in

1073
00:39:29,646 --> 00:39:31,719
some way and you are okay with me

1074
00:39:31,719 --> 00:39:32,197
doing it.

1075
00:39:33,553 --> 00:39:34,053
Then

1076
00:39:35,068 --> 00:39:36,742
I can let that just oh what's part

1077
00:39:36,742 --> 00:39:38,591
of my routine now. And it makes my

1078
00:39:38,591 --> 00:39:41,065
daddy happy. And I like making my daddy

1079
00:39:41,065 --> 00:39:43,538
happy and them. Mh. The day comes at

1080
00:39:43,538 --> 00:39:44,176
some point,

1081
00:39:44,829 --> 00:39:46,416
that I go, but I don't have to

1082
00:39:46,416 --> 00:39:48,719
do this because we didn't negotiate it. I

1083
00:39:48,719 --> 00:39:50,148
just won't do it today, and I really

1084
00:39:50,148 --> 00:39:52,132
don't know what wild hair gets mask for

1085
00:39:52,132 --> 00:39:53,663
that. Because I am so routine.

1086
00:39:54,462 --> 00:39:56,081
Pressure you something them. Go

1087
00:39:56,539 --> 00:39:58,717
stars are in alignment. But now I've created

1088
00:39:58,777 --> 00:39:59,277
the

1089
00:39:59,735 --> 00:40:01,825
expectation that I will do a thing. And

1090
00:40:01,825 --> 00:40:04,616
what can come with that is if I

1091
00:40:04,616 --> 00:40:06,609
know the expectation is there,

1092
00:40:07,885 --> 00:40:08,784
but also,

1093
00:40:09,734 --> 00:40:13,087
we haven't negotiated. That's where resentment can build.

1094
00:40:13,327 --> 00:40:15,322
Mh. So the thing to do,

1095
00:40:16,280 --> 00:40:18,675
the ideal thing to do, I'll say to

1096
00:40:18,675 --> 00:40:20,604
service missiles out there, maybe some submissive in

1097
00:40:20,604 --> 00:40:22,439
general. If you have an idea of a

1098
00:40:22,439 --> 00:40:25,151
thing to do for your partner that make

1099
00:40:25,151 --> 00:40:26,188
gives you all the good feels.

1100
00:40:26,905 --> 00:40:29,154
The ideal thing is to ask first, because

1101
00:40:29,154 --> 00:40:30,591
you do want their consent.

1102
00:40:31,389 --> 00:40:34,524
Some things are harmless putting out his probiotic

1103
00:40:34,743 --> 00:40:37,058
every day was a net good. It was

1104
00:40:37,058 --> 00:40:39,145
a net benefit it helped him because I

1105
00:40:39,145 --> 00:40:40,493
watched his ass struggle. Okay.

1106
00:40:42,870 --> 00:40:43,370
So

1107
00:40:43,822 --> 00:40:46,453
there are short hands and understanding that and

1108
00:40:46,453 --> 00:40:48,440
in in relationships after a while where you

1109
00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:50,348
don't have to ask everything Mh.

1110
00:40:51,063 --> 00:40:54,164
But it's still good practice in an ideal

1111
00:40:54,164 --> 00:40:56,166
world. It would have been weapon better for

1112
00:40:56,166 --> 00:40:57,119
me to say.

1113
00:40:57,755 --> 00:40:59,027
Do you want me to just do this

1114
00:40:59,027 --> 00:41:00,775
for you? And that we have had moments

1115
00:41:00,775 --> 00:41:02,523
like that where I've seen a thing. And

1116
00:41:02,602 --> 00:41:04,608
I'm like, I could totally just do that

1117
00:41:04,608 --> 00:41:06,121
for now. And I've asked, do you want

1118
00:41:06,121 --> 00:41:06,918
me to do this for you?

1119
00:41:07,873 --> 00:41:08,692
And sometimes

1120
00:41:09,068 --> 00:41:10,900
it's led to a conversation of yet, add

1121
00:41:10,900 --> 00:41:13,230
this on and sometimes like, I can handle

1122
00:41:13,230 --> 00:41:14,590
this, but today I could use some help.

1123
00:41:14,909 --> 00:41:16,670
Yeah. And that's the ideal thing is ask

1124
00:41:16,670 --> 00:41:18,349
first. Right? Ask if you can do the

1125
00:41:18,349 --> 00:41:19,630
thing, ask if they want you to do

1126
00:41:19,630 --> 00:41:22,605
the thing that opens up the ability to

1127
00:41:22,605 --> 00:41:25,244
negotiate it, so you both are on the

1128
00:41:25,244 --> 00:41:26,125
same fucking page.

1129
00:41:27,005 --> 00:41:28,684
If you don't do that because you have

1130
00:41:28,684 --> 00:41:30,525
that kind of relationship where that shorthand is

1131
00:41:30,525 --> 00:41:31,495
sort of happens. Right?

1132
00:41:33,006 --> 00:41:34,596
And or if you're the type of person

1133
00:41:34,596 --> 00:41:35,948
is like, I see a need, I must

1134
00:41:35,948 --> 00:41:38,015
fill it. They won't even know it's me.

1135
00:41:38,890 --> 00:41:41,054
Happens until they see the job done. I'm

1136
00:41:41,054 --> 00:41:42,567
like a little fairy. I don't know what

1137
00:41:42,567 --> 00:41:45,193
the. I'm I'm I'm a kinky Santa's elf.

1138
00:41:45,830 --> 00:41:46,706
Just wants to, like,

1139
00:41:47,277 --> 00:41:49,025
in service to my job,

1140
00:41:49,581 --> 00:41:51,567
have him walk and be pleasantly surprised at

1141
00:41:51,567 --> 00:41:52,440
what I fucking did for him.

1142
00:41:53,552 --> 00:41:55,634
I get an extreme amount of satisfaction action

1143
00:41:55,634 --> 00:41:57,073
and validation for that, I don't know.

1144
00:41:58,271 --> 00:42:00,749
But if if you don't have the conversation

1145
00:42:00,749 --> 00:42:02,347
on the front side and now you find

1146
00:42:02,347 --> 00:42:04,185
yourself doing things that in your mind, you're

1147
00:42:04,185 --> 00:42:05,078
going, but didn't...

1148
00:42:05,717 --> 00:42:07,233
This isn't on a rule that I have

1149
00:42:07,233 --> 00:42:10,586
to follow. Mh. But I'm getting somebody's fuss

1150
00:42:10,586 --> 00:42:12,900
at me because I'm not doing it. Stop.

1151
00:42:13,219 --> 00:42:16,819
I have the conversation. Right? The other thing,

1152
00:42:16,979 --> 00:42:18,594
and this is the harder 1

1153
00:42:18,970 --> 00:42:20,643
because sometimes people are unreasonable.

1154
00:42:21,440 --> 00:42:23,526
It is too... I mean it's aren't unreasonable

1155
00:42:23,526 --> 00:42:24,960
because you shouldn't be with? And sometimes aren't

1156
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:27,748
unreasonable because sometimes people just... They need a

1157
00:42:27,748 --> 00:42:29,421
moment, and maybe they're hungry. I don't know.

1158
00:42:30,945 --> 00:42:31,445
Sometimes,

1159
00:42:31,977 --> 00:42:33,803
you're gonna have wanna who's gonna have partner

1160
00:42:33,803 --> 00:42:35,549
who asks you to do something, and they're

1161
00:42:35,549 --> 00:42:37,613
trying to negotiate a new task a new

1162
00:42:37,613 --> 00:42:38,980
ask and will you do this? For me,

1163
00:42:39,139 --> 00:42:40,260
daddy. Get out a little of that.

1164
00:42:42,179 --> 00:42:43,859
And you're not gonna wanna if Fucking can

1165
00:42:43,859 --> 00:42:44,260
do it.

1166
00:42:46,914 --> 00:42:49,465
To this ism out there. Please speak up

1167
00:42:49,465 --> 00:42:51,060
for yourself and say I don't want to

1168
00:42:51,060 --> 00:42:51,379
do that.

1169
00:42:52,973 --> 00:42:55,546
In an ideal world, your partner backs off

1170
00:42:55,939 --> 00:42:58,413
and or you brainstorm store between the 2

1171
00:42:58,413 --> 00:42:59,769
of you to figure out a way that

1172
00:42:59,769 --> 00:43:01,046
they get what they want and it's it

1173
00:43:01,046 --> 00:43:04,993
within your parameters. But the thing to remember

1174
00:43:06,409 --> 00:43:08,905
is that submissive are not under any

1175
00:43:09,283 --> 00:43:09,783
obligation

1176
00:43:10,161 --> 00:43:11,460
to say yes

1177
00:43:11,997 --> 00:43:14,725
to a negotiation a thing that be added

1178
00:43:14,725 --> 00:43:16,400
to your submissive of life for your dominance.

1179
00:43:16,719 --> 00:43:18,474
If you don't wanna fucking do it. That's

1180
00:43:18,474 --> 00:43:21,664
true. And that's hard. It's... I'm I'm saying

1181
00:43:21,664 --> 00:43:23,753
especially for your service of because I'm speaking

1182
00:43:23,753 --> 00:43:25,929
for my personal experience, and that is

1183
00:43:26,307 --> 00:43:28,702
I get great joy out of taking care

1184
00:43:28,702 --> 00:43:29,181
of Jb,

1185
00:43:29,820 --> 00:43:31,895
and it put hits me right in the

1186
00:43:31,895 --> 00:43:32,628
sub field. Those It's...

1187
00:43:33,507 --> 00:43:34,784
I've said this before, and I don't know

1188
00:43:34,784 --> 00:43:36,061
what this is about, and I should look

1189
00:43:36,061 --> 00:43:39,355
into it. I can feel a physical pain

1190
00:43:39,493 --> 00:43:40,451
in my body.

1191
00:43:41,010 --> 00:43:43,172
Those when Jb can't have something he wants.

1192
00:43:43,331 --> 00:43:45,797
When Jb b is disappointed, when I can't

1193
00:43:45,797 --> 00:43:47,150
give Jb b something he wants.

1194
00:43:49,239 --> 00:43:52,039
The fight for me. My own internal fight

1195
00:43:52,039 --> 00:43:55,420
is I have to be honest about what

1196
00:43:55,735 --> 00:43:57,575
I am capable of doing what I have

1197
00:43:57,575 --> 00:43:58,614
the energy levels for.

1198
00:43:59,255 --> 00:44:01,594
What I am willing to do because the

1199
00:44:01,655 --> 00:44:04,619
desire to to do things for Jb in

1200
00:44:04,619 --> 00:44:06,129
service of my dominant,

1201
00:44:07,639 --> 00:44:08,139
can

1202
00:44:08,672 --> 00:44:09,808
over power

1203
00:44:10,420 --> 00:44:11,874
my own good goddamn

1204
00:44:12,184 --> 00:44:14,184
sense of, you don't have any more time

1205
00:44:14,184 --> 00:44:15,704
in your date for that shit. Right. What

1206
00:44:15,704 --> 00:44:18,425
are you... And that that seems like that

1207
00:44:18,425 --> 00:44:21,237
is a danger or a downfall. All Mh.

1208
00:44:21,477 --> 00:44:23,253
To to task creep

1209
00:44:23,790 --> 00:44:26,422
because, you know, yeah, it's it's not something

1210
00:44:26,422 --> 00:44:28,017
that that was negotiated,

1211
00:44:28,576 --> 00:44:31,222
not something that was talked about. And and

1212
00:44:31,222 --> 00:44:31,780
you do it.

1213
00:44:32,656 --> 00:44:33,156
And

1214
00:44:34,488 --> 00:44:34,727
yeah.

1215
00:44:35,524 --> 00:44:36,024
1

1216
00:44:36,400 --> 00:44:37,856
of many, but 1

1217
00:44:38,551 --> 00:44:39,108
indication of...

1218
00:44:40,239 --> 00:44:41,617
Can this power exchange

1219
00:44:42,394 --> 00:44:42,894
potentially

1220
00:44:43,751 --> 00:44:46,146
go for the long term. Right? Potentially work

1221
00:44:46,146 --> 00:44:48,700
out be healthy and solid and something worth...

1222
00:44:49,114 --> 00:44:50,570
Having and fighting for

1223
00:44:51,106 --> 00:44:51,606
is

1224
00:44:51,983 --> 00:44:53,498
can either side of the slash,

1225
00:44:54,295 --> 00:44:57,337
handle being told no. Handle being told I

1226
00:44:57,337 --> 00:44:59,007
don't wanna do that. That's that's not a

1227
00:44:59,007 --> 00:45:00,041
thing I'm willing to do.

1228
00:45:00,756 --> 00:45:01,813
And I think

1229
00:45:02,426 --> 00:45:04,119
not always, but I think

1230
00:45:04,970 --> 00:45:07,688
many Kings find it, Easier and put air

1231
00:45:07,688 --> 00:45:09,276
quotes around that. Right because that's subjective.

1232
00:45:09,911 --> 00:45:11,739
To do it when we're talking about kinks.

1233
00:45:12,295 --> 00:45:14,043
No. I won't let you hit me. No.

1234
00:45:14,201 --> 00:45:15,790
I don't wanna be tied up. No. I

1235
00:45:15,790 --> 00:45:17,318
don't want to tee value you up and

1236
00:45:17,318 --> 00:45:18,914
call you names. Like, whatever.

1237
00:45:19,313 --> 00:45:21,947
Mh. But in power exchange where,

1238
00:45:23,065 --> 00:45:25,060
depending... No matter how you define your power

1239
00:45:25,060 --> 00:45:27,074
stranger or what your specific roles are, and

1240
00:45:27,074 --> 00:45:28,055
what kind of

1241
00:45:28,434 --> 00:45:29,735
power exchanger, the

1242
00:45:30,035 --> 00:45:30,275
relationship,

1243
00:45:31,315 --> 00:45:33,289
on some level, the submissive has to

1244
00:45:33,726 --> 00:45:34,702
do a thing

1245
00:45:35,312 --> 00:45:37,318
in some way that satisfies

1246
00:45:37,691 --> 00:45:40,149
the dom. The dom is going to demand

1247
00:45:40,149 --> 00:45:41,125
slash asks

1248
00:45:41,514 --> 00:45:44,646
request, things, and the submissive is going to

1249
00:45:45,182 --> 00:45:47,257
give up that control in some way to

1250
00:45:47,257 --> 00:45:49,410
do what's being asked of them. Mh. And

1251
00:45:49,410 --> 00:45:50,628
so I think

1252
00:45:51,005 --> 00:45:52,291
for some people,

1253
00:45:53,957 --> 00:45:54,910
especially if you...

1254
00:45:56,259 --> 00:45:57,766
You know, there's that part of you as

1255
00:45:57,766 --> 00:45:59,885
a submissive I'm speaking on that perspective for

1256
00:46:00,163 --> 00:46:02,785
you want to give your dominant what they

1257
00:46:02,785 --> 00:46:03,023
want.

1258
00:46:04,374 --> 00:46:06,679
I think too many people probably find it

1259
00:46:06,679 --> 00:46:07,076
harder,

1260
00:46:07,488 --> 00:46:09,313
to go... But I don't... That that I

1261
00:46:09,313 --> 00:46:10,266
don't want to do that. Like,

1262
00:46:12,488 --> 00:46:12,988
I'm

1263
00:46:13,361 --> 00:46:14,844
trying to think that about

1264
00:46:15,363 --> 00:46:18,157
if you came to me tomorrow and said

1265
00:46:18,157 --> 00:46:20,233
baby girl? I would like to go over

1266
00:46:20,233 --> 00:46:21,032
your task list...

1267
00:46:22,069 --> 00:46:23,746
Because you know, you know my buttons to

1268
00:46:23,746 --> 00:46:26,806
push and There's not a single task. He

1269
00:46:27,338 --> 00:46:28,926
sets for me that that we negotiate and

1270
00:46:29,005 --> 00:46:31,070
I agree to. That doesn't have some level

1271
00:46:31,070 --> 00:46:32,658
of I need you to do this for

1272
00:46:32,658 --> 00:46:35,938
me. The magic words are for me. Right?

1273
00:46:36,257 --> 00:46:37,773
Because I'm a sucker for that shit.

1274
00:46:39,208 --> 00:46:41,521
You came to me tomorrow and said for

1275
00:46:41,521 --> 00:46:43,515
me, baby girl. For my life from my

1276
00:46:43,515 --> 00:46:45,847
sanity for my mental health. Mh.

1277
00:46:46,407 --> 00:46:47,466
I need you

1278
00:46:48,245 --> 00:46:50,323
to take on the task of doing every

1279
00:46:50,323 --> 00:46:52,960
stitch laundry that we have work clothes, regular

1280
00:46:52,960 --> 00:46:53,200
clothes,

1281
00:46:54,092 --> 00:46:54,569
towels,

1282
00:46:55,284 --> 00:46:57,746
sheets. Mh. All of that. I don't wanna

1283
00:46:57,746 --> 00:46:59,494
do that anymore, and I want you as

1284
00:46:59,494 --> 00:47:02,055
my submissive to do that for me.

1285
00:47:06,676 --> 00:47:08,603
If he caught me in the right slash

1286
00:47:08,603 --> 00:47:11,316
wrong mood. He'd probably get a sassy cheeky

1287
00:47:11,316 --> 00:47:12,193
little answer. Okay?

1288
00:47:13,311 --> 00:47:15,225
But if we were, like, having, like, doing

1289
00:47:15,225 --> 00:47:17,237
the state of the union on our power

1290
00:47:17,237 --> 00:47:18,856
exchange, and we were like, let's

1291
00:47:19,555 --> 00:47:20,913
reconfigure things. Right.

1292
00:47:22,112 --> 00:47:26,143
I know that my initial non sarcastic response

1293
00:47:26,442 --> 00:47:28,040
would want to be yes.

1294
00:47:29,238 --> 00:47:32,215
Except 1, I fucking hate laundry

1295
00:47:33,404 --> 00:47:35,233
I can tolerate doing we part of it.

1296
00:47:35,392 --> 00:47:37,858
Right? I can make myself do that. 2,

1297
00:47:38,494 --> 00:47:40,501
within 2 we we'd don't be walking around

1298
00:47:40,501 --> 00:47:43,054
here, naked anyway because I...

1299
00:47:43,612 --> 00:47:45,686
Sometimes my only task is to fold it

1300
00:47:45,686 --> 00:47:47,600
and it still sits there for 4 days

1301
00:47:47,600 --> 00:47:49,927
before I finally get to it. And it's

1302
00:47:49,927 --> 00:47:50,963
1 of those things I would have to

1303
00:47:50,963 --> 00:47:52,398
be able to look at Jb and go.

1304
00:47:53,036 --> 00:47:55,028
I love you. I'm your submissive.

1305
00:47:55,586 --> 00:47:58,253
I'll do so much for you. But and

1306
00:47:58,626 --> 00:48:00,372
I'll do anything for love, but I won't

1307
00:48:00,372 --> 00:48:01,403
do that. Do that.

1308
00:48:02,118 --> 00:48:02,856
And that

1309
00:48:03,943 --> 00:48:04,682
that is

1310
00:48:05,134 --> 00:48:06,087
1 of many.

1311
00:48:06,657 --> 00:48:07,713
Reasons why

1312
00:48:08,244 --> 00:48:11,020
communications, slash negotiation, negotiation is just another word

1313
00:48:11,020 --> 00:48:13,454
for. Y'all. Yeah. Is so important

1314
00:48:14,369 --> 00:48:17,707
But it's also the insidious of where at

1315
00:48:17,707 --> 00:48:20,353
least for submissive, I can absolutely see

1316
00:48:21,045 --> 00:48:23,928
task creep occurring. Mh. Your ass to do

1317
00:48:23,928 --> 00:48:26,245
as a 1 off or you see a

1318
00:48:26,245 --> 00:48:28,083
need to help your partner and you do

1319
00:48:28,083 --> 00:48:30,400
something that you don't normally do as a

1320
00:48:30,400 --> 00:48:32,893
1 off. Next, you know there's an expectation

1321
00:48:32,893 --> 00:48:34,570
being created next thing, you know, you've got

1322
00:48:34,570 --> 00:48:37,208
a partner asking you, hey, as your dominant,

1323
00:48:37,367 --> 00:48:38,646
I'd like to ask you to do this.

1324
00:48:39,045 --> 00:48:39,785
It takes

1325
00:48:40,416 --> 00:48:42,564
sometimes more strengthen you might think you have,

1326
00:48:42,723 --> 00:48:45,848
but you do asset to go. I understand

1327
00:48:46,223 --> 00:48:47,987
that you want this, I cannot give it

1328
00:48:47,987 --> 00:48:50,054
to you in the way you're you're asking

1329
00:48:50,054 --> 00:48:51,087
for right now. Now,

1330
00:48:52,041 --> 00:48:53,789
negotiation tends to mean you can do the

1331
00:48:53,789 --> 00:48:56,039
back and forth. Mh Like, if you... It's

1332
00:48:56,039 --> 00:48:57,400
kind of what we did. You came to

1333
00:48:57,400 --> 00:48:59,160
me went. I'm so. On I'm fucking laundry.

1334
00:48:59,400 --> 00:49:01,640
I can't do this anymore. And I went,

1335
00:49:01,960 --> 00:49:03,891
I can't do it sorry.

1336
00:49:04,923 --> 00:49:07,170
Because I do know myself. And the

1337
00:49:07,543 --> 00:49:09,846
negotiation was, can you give a little and

1338
00:49:10,005 --> 00:49:11,117
I'll give a little? Right.

1339
00:49:11,767 --> 00:49:12,267
Sometimes

1340
00:49:12,879 --> 00:49:15,182
the answer is no. Sometimes it's so far

1341
00:49:15,182 --> 00:49:17,327
outside of your zone, you're like, pale fuck,

1342
00:49:17,407 --> 00:49:20,108
no. I'm not doing it. And no is

1343
00:49:20,108 --> 00:49:22,452
a complete sentence. You are not

1344
00:49:22,909 --> 00:49:25,939
obligated to to justify yourself and give 80

1345
00:49:26,019 --> 00:49:28,730
Ba reasons to a partner why you can't

1346
00:49:28,730 --> 00:49:32,011
do it. You can choose. Too. I'm happy

1347
00:49:32,011 --> 00:49:33,523
to tell Jb, You don't want me to

1348
00:49:33,523 --> 00:49:35,511
be responsible for that because we are gonna

1349
00:49:35,511 --> 00:49:36,227
be naked. Right?

1350
00:49:38,070 --> 00:49:40,212
The thing to... And this is just negotiation

1351
00:49:40,212 --> 00:49:42,195
01:01, I think at this point. The thing

1352
00:49:42,195 --> 00:49:43,091
to look for

1353
00:49:43,543 --> 00:49:45,606
in that instance is not just can your

1354
00:49:45,606 --> 00:49:46,577
part or accept no,

1355
00:49:47,215 --> 00:49:49,448
especially as a full fucking sentence either side

1356
00:49:49,448 --> 00:49:50,326
of slash on that 1.

1357
00:49:51,602 --> 00:49:52,102
It's

1358
00:49:52,958 --> 00:49:55,351
when they try to... Because sometimes you're really

1359
00:49:55,351 --> 00:49:57,515
good at this I go new. I can't

1360
00:49:57,515 --> 00:50:00,856
do that. Most often you. Okay. We'll figure

1361
00:50:00,856 --> 00:50:03,561
something else out, or you come back with

1362
00:50:03,561 --> 00:50:05,724
could you do this? And if I can

1363
00:50:05,724 --> 00:50:07,711
do this alternative. I will.

1364
00:50:08,585 --> 00:50:11,128
The the harder to to know if it's

1365
00:50:11,128 --> 00:50:14,045
gonna happen part is the partner who goes

1366
00:50:14,243 --> 00:50:16,387
starts doing the pressure thing and starts trying

1367
00:50:16,387 --> 00:50:18,848
to re word and twist the concept. So

1368
00:50:19,403 --> 00:50:22,659
It doesn't... They're they're getting more than they're

1369
00:50:22,659 --> 00:50:23,626
giving. Right? Right Like,

1370
00:50:24,341 --> 00:50:26,961
we split laundry in half. We split taking

1371
00:50:26,961 --> 00:50:28,470
care of the kitchen in half. The person

1372
00:50:28,470 --> 00:50:29,288
who cooks

1373
00:50:29,661 --> 00:50:32,004
does not wash the dishes now. Right generally.

1374
00:50:32,541 --> 00:50:34,776
Again, that's not Power exchange Cha household shit.

1375
00:50:35,016 --> 00:50:35,175
Right?

1376
00:50:36,133 --> 00:50:38,607
But if Jb was that We gross kind

1377
00:50:38,607 --> 00:50:40,770
of partner who was, like, well, You could

1378
00:50:40,770 --> 00:50:42,198
do it for me this? And could you

1379
00:50:42,198 --> 00:50:44,340
do that? Or if I said, hey, no.

1380
00:50:44,737 --> 00:50:45,848
I don't wanna do it that way. And

1381
00:50:45,848 --> 00:50:48,045
here's why. Yeah. Then what he did was

1382
00:50:48,164 --> 00:50:50,472
try and talk around my reason to make

1383
00:50:50,472 --> 00:50:52,303
my reason sound stupid to me so that

1384
00:50:52,462 --> 00:50:53,974
I backed off and went like, okay. If

1385
00:50:53,974 --> 00:50:54,930
you want me to That kind of thing.

1386
00:50:55,089 --> 00:50:55,248
Now.

1387
00:50:56,299 --> 00:50:57,576
Excuse me. That

1388
00:50:59,572 --> 00:51:02,067
kind of borders on something to master frostbite

1389
00:51:02,126 --> 00:51:02,924
said in the aisle.

1390
00:51:03,962 --> 00:51:04,680
Chat? Mh.

1391
00:51:05,650 --> 00:51:06,127
Said, so,

1392
00:51:07,001 --> 00:51:07,501
could

1393
00:51:08,592 --> 00:51:09,092
this

1394
00:51:09,625 --> 00:51:10,920
fall in the scope

1395
00:51:11,534 --> 00:51:12,885
of being a king dispenser?

1396
00:51:13,695 --> 00:51:15,363
Oh, like, from the dom side of things

1397
00:51:15,522 --> 00:51:18,143
Abs so fucking lily. If a dom... I

1398
00:51:18,143 --> 00:51:19,971
mean, the concept is the same. I just...

1399
00:51:20,527 --> 00:51:22,135
I'm curious as to how common it is.

1400
00:51:22,614 --> 00:51:24,454
If a dom does a thing for their

1401
00:51:24,454 --> 00:51:24,954
submissive

1402
00:51:25,414 --> 00:51:28,135
1 time. Mh. That wasn't necessarily negotiated, but

1403
00:51:28,135 --> 00:51:29,414
that they were like, yeah, we'll do that

1404
00:51:29,414 --> 00:51:31,904
thing, that you wanted to do. I'll I'll

1405
00:51:31,904 --> 00:51:33,419
leave that dom for you in that way.

1406
00:51:33,658 --> 00:51:35,731
Right. And then you set... And then there's

1407
00:51:35,731 --> 00:51:39,022
an expectation created. And sometimes you can hear

1408
00:51:39,255 --> 00:51:40,773
a person kind of doing that With, like,

1409
00:51:40,932 --> 00:51:43,010
well you did it for me last time.

1410
00:51:45,568 --> 00:51:48,045
And and, you know, yeah. That's that's something

1411
00:51:48,045 --> 00:51:48,365
that

1412
00:51:50,052 --> 00:51:50,370
you know,

1413
00:51:51,879 --> 00:51:54,818
could very definitely happen. And and on either

1414
00:51:54,818 --> 00:51:58,177
side, Yeah. Like that. Because, you know, you

1415
00:51:59,360 --> 00:52:00,552
as as a submissive,

1416
00:52:01,108 --> 00:52:02,697
you know, you could just take on more

1417
00:52:02,697 --> 00:52:04,207
and more and more sitting there. Well, yeah.

1418
00:52:04,445 --> 00:52:06,608
Look like she doing all great. Great. Right.

1419
00:52:06,848 --> 00:52:08,684
Nothing no. Right. And there arcs. And I

1420
00:52:08,684 --> 00:52:10,998
know I know that these dom exist. They're

1421
00:52:10,998 --> 00:52:13,233
absolutely dom exist. Think that's what missiles are

1422
00:52:13,233 --> 00:52:14,111
there for. Mh.

1423
00:52:15,003 --> 00:52:17,389
I am when I am able to. I'll

1424
00:52:17,389 --> 00:52:18,582
take on as much as I can hand.

1425
00:52:18,821 --> 00:52:19,878
I'll take on more

1426
00:52:20,332 --> 00:52:22,161
too much to my own detriment. Thankfully. I

1427
00:52:22,161 --> 00:52:23,116
have a partner who will not let me

1428
00:52:23,116 --> 00:52:23,329
do.

1429
00:52:24,086 --> 00:52:25,760
But I'm also willing to do that. That's

1430
00:52:25,760 --> 00:52:26,976
not just because I'm,

1431
00:52:27,512 --> 00:52:30,062
you know, let around by my own fucking

1432
00:52:30,062 --> 00:52:32,793
urges. It's because I'm receiving

1433
00:52:33,265 --> 00:52:35,265
as much as I'm giving, You know, I

1434
00:52:35,265 --> 00:52:37,525
have a partner. I have a person who

1435
00:52:37,825 --> 00:52:40,065
if I, you know, go to Jb 4

1436
00:52:40,065 --> 00:52:42,800
help or guidance or please please decide this

1437
00:52:42,800 --> 00:52:45,200
for me. Right? He's gonna do that. He's

1438
00:52:45,200 --> 00:52:47,380
going to fulfill his side of the bargain

1439
00:52:47,440 --> 00:52:47,599
here.

1440
00:52:49,215 --> 00:52:50,275
And that's why

1441
00:52:51,135 --> 00:52:53,934
task creep for us has been a 1

1442
00:52:53,934 --> 00:52:56,335
off. It's been a thing that got just

1443
00:52:56,335 --> 00:52:58,661
figured out real quick. Yeah. It's never been

1444
00:52:58,661 --> 00:52:59,796
a thing where

1445
00:53:00,488 --> 00:53:02,712
resentment was allowed to build within me.

1446
00:53:04,221 --> 00:53:06,206
Because once we recognized the thing was happening,

1447
00:53:06,365 --> 00:53:07,024
we just

1448
00:53:07,333 --> 00:53:08,443
dealt with it. Mh.

1449
00:53:08,920 --> 00:53:10,983
But also, he has proven over the years

1450
00:53:10,983 --> 00:53:12,887
that if he sees me doing too much,

1451
00:53:13,045 --> 00:53:15,425
he will... I will shut it down. Absolutely.

1452
00:53:16,235 --> 00:53:16,735
And

1453
00:53:17,666 --> 00:53:19,575
that's that's the... You know, we talk about

1454
00:53:19,575 --> 00:53:20,313
the responsibility

1455
00:53:20,847 --> 00:53:22,994
both sides have responsibility, but the responsibility of

1456
00:53:22,994 --> 00:53:23,391
a dom,

1457
00:53:24,201 --> 00:53:25,948
is not to just take and take and

1458
00:53:25,948 --> 00:53:27,853
take and take every fucking thing a submissive

1459
00:53:27,853 --> 00:53:29,862
will give them. It's to

1460
00:53:30,394 --> 00:53:30,894
sometimes

1461
00:53:31,506 --> 00:53:33,348
within the scope of your power. Change,

1462
00:53:34,066 --> 00:53:36,695
protect a missile from the fucking south. Right.

1463
00:53:37,014 --> 00:53:39,326
And and, you know, and and that's kind

1464
00:53:39,326 --> 00:53:39,826
why

1465
00:53:41,094 --> 00:53:42,795
you know, we had

1466
00:53:45,414 --> 00:53:47,175
kind a thing going on with with the

1467
00:53:47,175 --> 00:53:47,574
youngest,

1468
00:53:49,667 --> 00:53:52,529
and and and and this nice lady over

1469
00:53:52,529 --> 00:53:52,688
here,

1470
00:53:54,040 --> 00:53:56,743
you know, she she was bearing the brunt

1471
00:53:56,743 --> 00:53:58,118
of all the home

1472
00:53:59,462 --> 00:54:01,554
and and still taking care of her

1473
00:54:03,521 --> 00:54:06,170
tasks and doing her work and doing everything

1474
00:54:06,227 --> 00:54:06,679
out

1475
00:54:07,518 --> 00:54:09,673
and and that's when I finally stepped in

1476
00:54:09,673 --> 00:54:11,908
and we've gotten a little bit more... We've

1477
00:54:11,908 --> 00:54:13,824
gotten a little better. We have... More equitable

1478
00:54:13,903 --> 00:54:15,795
More more equitable. We've we've

1479
00:54:16,554 --> 00:54:18,974
established a little better routine that works

1480
00:54:19,674 --> 00:54:21,594
better for all of us. Mh.

1481
00:54:22,234 --> 00:54:22,734
And

1482
00:54:23,049 --> 00:54:25,045
Yeah. I I step in and and help

1483
00:54:25,045 --> 00:54:27,440
more even with the homeschool and And I've

1484
00:54:27,440 --> 00:54:29,994
gotten better at just asking you. That's another

1485
00:54:29,994 --> 00:54:32,045
thing. And I've... Again, this can be either

1486
00:54:32,164 --> 00:54:33,596
of the slash because I think this is

1487
00:54:33,596 --> 00:54:36,699
personality based. I just know from experience. It

1488
00:54:36,699 --> 00:54:39,961
happens to plenty of submissive, including myself. And

1489
00:54:39,961 --> 00:54:40,699
that is

1490
00:54:41,648 --> 00:54:43,643
as a submissive as a person in a

1491
00:54:43,643 --> 00:54:46,675
power change. You got to figure out how

1492
00:54:46,675 --> 00:54:49,320
to learn how to ask for help. Now

1493
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:51,627
does your partner of either side of the

1494
00:54:51,627 --> 00:54:52,127
slash

1495
00:54:52,820 --> 00:54:56,278
need to be a person who for will

1496
00:54:56,336 --> 00:54:59,440
give you that help who will step in

1497
00:54:59,440 --> 00:55:02,225
when you need support, who is paying enough

1498
00:55:02,225 --> 00:55:04,069
fucking attention to some, I'm see that you

1499
00:55:04,069 --> 00:55:05,818
need support before you Ask for. Mh. Yes.

1500
00:55:06,135 --> 00:55:07,668
Okay. 1 1

1501
00:55:08,122 --> 00:55:10,506
not easy but clear way to weed out.

1502
00:55:10,838 --> 00:55:13,540
A shitty shitty partner is what do they

1503
00:55:13,540 --> 00:55:15,289
do when you need help? You know, do

1504
00:55:15,289 --> 00:55:16,639
you even feel like you can ask for

1505
00:55:16,639 --> 00:55:18,824
help, but a I

1506
00:55:19,280 --> 00:55:20,315
probably knew.

1507
00:55:21,032 --> 00:55:23,821
I could ask for help long before I

1508
00:55:23,821 --> 00:55:26,609
started asking for help, and I still fucking

1509
00:55:26,609 --> 00:55:28,775
struggle. Give you example that has nothing new

1510
00:55:28,775 --> 00:55:30,608
with Power change. It's just about people in

1511
00:55:30,608 --> 00:55:31,245
a relationship.

1512
00:55:33,077 --> 00:55:35,945
The youngest has health issues and so what

1513
00:55:35,945 --> 00:55:38,028
he eats him when he eats is of

1514
00:55:38,028 --> 00:55:40,808
the utmost important these days. It's top priority

1515
00:55:40,808 --> 00:55:43,350
over everything. Mh. Mh. So when that kid

1516
00:55:43,350 --> 00:55:46,150
says, mom, I'm hungry, and I want this.

1517
00:55:46,710 --> 00:55:48,309
I stop everything. Doesn't fucking matter.

1518
00:55:49,510 --> 00:55:51,909
I am making him something to eat, and

1519
00:55:52,070 --> 00:55:53,530
I have a raging headache

1520
00:55:54,642 --> 00:55:57,744
and I am I'm desperately thirsty, like, should

1521
00:55:57,744 --> 00:55:58,619
have been drinking more water.

1522
00:55:59,494 --> 00:56:02,278
And I know that what needs the way

1523
00:56:02,278 --> 00:56:02,778
my

1524
00:56:03,088 --> 00:56:04,279
I know what could have happened. I know

1525
00:56:04,279 --> 00:56:05,074
all the ways I could've have done it,

1526
00:56:05,153 --> 00:56:06,344
but I know based on how I am.

1527
00:56:06,503 --> 00:56:08,489
I was like, I'm gonna start on his

1528
00:56:08,489 --> 00:56:10,077
food, But I also know how to distracted

1529
00:56:10,077 --> 00:56:12,082
it it. Right? So I I said, Jb

1530
00:56:12,162 --> 00:56:13,679
I was like, and it was the third

1531
00:56:13,679 --> 00:56:15,035
thing I had asked for help on in

1532
00:56:15,035 --> 00:56:16,951
the same day, and that's just not like

1533
00:56:16,951 --> 00:56:18,148
me. And I like oh my. I can't

1534
00:56:18,148 --> 00:56:19,320
believe I'm asking this. Oh my. I'm so.

1535
00:56:19,519 --> 00:56:21,039
He's was like, what, Just fucking ask me.

1536
00:56:21,599 --> 00:56:23,599
And I'm like, look, I gotta start making

1537
00:56:23,599 --> 00:56:26,400
this thing and it takes concentration. Could you

1538
00:56:26,400 --> 00:56:28,239
grab me some ibuprofen. Could you get me

1539
00:56:28,239 --> 00:56:30,324
something drink, and I'll pop it down real

1540
00:56:30,324 --> 00:56:31,755
quick while I'm doing this He's like, of

1541
00:56:31,755 --> 00:56:32,868
course, I fucking will.

1542
00:56:34,538 --> 00:56:37,582
Everybody out there deserves a partner that within

1543
00:56:37,797 --> 00:56:38,949
their abilities

1544
00:56:40,039 --> 00:56:41,493
gives help that enthusiastically.

1545
00:56:42,583 --> 00:56:44,196
It needs to be reciprocate.

1546
00:56:44,650 --> 00:56:46,081
You can't just be asking for help all

1547
00:56:46,081 --> 00:56:47,115
the time and never given it.

1548
00:56:48,244 --> 00:56:50,656
But that is another way to sometimes

1549
00:56:51,112 --> 00:56:52,944
avoid task creep. If you are the person,

1550
00:56:53,183 --> 00:56:55,972
either side of the slash, who thinks that

1551
00:56:55,972 --> 00:56:57,007
you are the best person for the job,

1552
00:56:57,166 --> 00:56:58,539
and you have all the things and people

1553
00:56:58,539 --> 00:57:00,380
are counting on you, and I know dominance

1554
00:57:00,380 --> 00:57:02,059
who feel that way. And you just go...

1555
00:57:02,139 --> 00:57:03,339
Well, I'll just do it. Just do it.

1556
00:57:03,500 --> 00:57:05,339
I'll just do it. You'll get task creep

1557
00:57:05,339 --> 00:57:06,894
that's not... Well habit,

1558
00:57:07,674 --> 00:57:08,954
you'll just take it on all the time

1559
00:57:08,954 --> 00:57:11,775
and then you're overwhelmed deed. We all deserve

1560
00:57:12,234 --> 00:57:14,130
the kind of relationship where we can at

1561
00:57:14,250 --> 00:57:15,849
as hard as it is. We can ask

1562
00:57:15,849 --> 00:57:17,690
a partner. Can you help me? And that

1563
00:57:17,690 --> 00:57:18,190
help

1564
00:57:18,730 --> 00:57:19,849
should not be conditional,

1565
00:57:20,730 --> 00:57:22,340
conditional on you not being an asshole in

1566
00:57:22,340 --> 00:57:24,173
your relationship, but this is not be conditional,

1567
00:57:24,890 --> 00:57:26,484
and it should be not just for the

1568
00:57:26,484 --> 00:57:29,528
big things when your life is... Floating around

1569
00:57:29,528 --> 00:57:31,444
you, but also when you just needed a

1570
00:57:31,444 --> 00:57:33,280
couple of Ibuprofen that was lost in the

1571
00:57:33,280 --> 00:57:34,078
depths of your purse,

1572
00:57:35,116 --> 00:57:37,670
and a refresh on your water, that, you

1573
00:57:37,670 --> 00:57:39,279
had left scattered to the winds in house.

1574
00:57:39,518 --> 00:57:41,271
III will say that,

1575
00:57:42,466 --> 00:57:44,002
you know, when when some of this

1576
00:57:44,378 --> 00:57:44,856
started

1577
00:57:45,748 --> 00:57:46,464
Creeping up.

1578
00:57:47,579 --> 00:57:49,730
I I love you. I love you so

1579
00:57:49,730 --> 00:57:49,889
much.

1580
00:57:51,960 --> 00:57:53,314
You you're the light of my life.

1581
00:57:54,681 --> 00:57:55,474
There are times,

1582
00:57:56,347 --> 00:57:58,092
you are a marty, and you will fall

1583
00:57:58,092 --> 00:58:00,233
on your sword. Oh, god. I then have

1584
00:58:00,233 --> 00:58:01,978
an attitude. Yeah.

1585
00:58:02,710 --> 00:58:04,309
And I'm. So sorry.

1586
00:58:05,510 --> 00:58:07,670
You know, you never asked for help. I

1587
00:58:07,670 --> 00:58:10,309
know. We can do task creep to ourselves

1588
00:58:10,309 --> 00:58:12,081
for fucking sure. You take on you take

1589
00:58:12,081 --> 00:58:13,356
on you take on. You do not ask

1590
00:58:13,356 --> 00:58:15,586
for help. And then again, you're the single

1591
00:58:15,586 --> 00:58:16,883
mom with 2 jobs

1592
00:58:17,339 --> 00:58:19,190
who loves your kids, and, you know, what

1593
00:58:19,349 --> 00:58:20,869
I can't remember the the Lyrics of the

1594
00:58:20,869 --> 00:58:21,989
song, but y'all know what I'm talking about,

1595
00:58:22,150 --> 00:58:22,309
Like,

1596
00:58:23,349 --> 00:58:23,590
yes.

1597
00:58:24,150 --> 00:58:26,630
Yes. I am I immediately become the most

1598
00:58:26,630 --> 00:58:28,801
put upon human being ever. And I...

1599
00:58:29,519 --> 00:58:31,672
Y'all, it is not a good look. It

1600
00:58:31,672 --> 00:58:33,427
is 1 of my red flags is I'm

1601
00:58:33,427 --> 00:58:34,623
not proud of it. Okay?

1602
00:58:35,500 --> 00:58:37,389
But, yeah. I... I mean, and that's why

1603
00:58:38,706 --> 00:58:41,018
you know, when the urge to ask for

1604
00:58:41,018 --> 00:58:43,491
help hit. Mh. I usually ignore that urge.

1605
00:58:43,730 --> 00:58:45,007
Okay. I usually just power through.

1606
00:58:48,926 --> 00:58:51,392
It... I stumbled. You heard me stumble over

1607
00:58:51,392 --> 00:58:53,143
my words because what I said was, I

1608
00:58:53,143 --> 00:58:54,630
wanna ask this thing, but I feel bad

1609
00:58:54,749 --> 00:58:56,022
asking for help for this because I could

1610
00:58:56,022 --> 00:58:57,693
just do it. I know I'm capable of

1611
00:58:57,693 --> 00:58:59,443
just doing it. And you were like, what

1612
00:58:59,443 --> 00:59:00,818
the fuck is it woman

1613
00:59:04,313 --> 00:59:06,625
In your case, you're so fucking eager to

1614
00:59:06,625 --> 00:59:09,335
help. You're like, please just ask me right.

1615
00:59:09,574 --> 00:59:09,893
Wow.

1616
00:59:12,778 --> 00:59:15,322
I know. And you know what? I I

1617
00:59:15,322 --> 00:59:17,548
know that happens in power exchange on either

1618
00:59:17,548 --> 00:59:19,218
side of the slash because there are plenty

1619
00:59:19,218 --> 00:59:20,434
of domes who

1620
00:59:20,904 --> 00:59:22,101
think they have to do it all, and

1621
00:59:22,101 --> 00:59:23,139
they have to carry it all on their

1622
00:59:23,139 --> 00:59:24,734
shoulders. And they've got some supporters who are

1623
00:59:24,734 --> 00:59:26,889
like, I would I would kill to fucking

1624
00:59:26,889 --> 00:59:28,565
help you, please give me something to do.

1625
00:59:29,379 --> 00:59:30,976
And then there is like me who are

1626
00:59:30,976 --> 00:59:32,574
like, nope. Nope. I got it. I've been

1627
00:59:32,574 --> 00:59:35,131
self sufficient. My whole ass adult life. I'll

1628
00:59:35,131 --> 00:59:36,065
just keep on going

1629
00:59:37,303 --> 00:59:38,661
I'm gonna say this wrong, and I'm not

1630
00:59:38,661 --> 00:59:40,338
a mental health professional, So I'm I might

1631
00:59:40,338 --> 00:59:41,617
not be using it quite correctly,

1632
00:59:42,336 --> 00:59:43,349
but there's this

1633
00:59:43,708 --> 00:59:45,144
thing I that keeps cutting up in my

1634
00:59:45,144 --> 00:59:46,123
feeds about

1635
00:59:46,739 --> 00:59:47,798
the coping mechanisms

1636
00:59:48,813 --> 00:59:51,126
that we learned through tough times life could

1637
00:59:51,126 --> 00:59:52,801
be childhood could be formal relationships.

1638
00:59:53,613 --> 00:59:55,468
Become I think the term is m

1639
00:59:56,244 --> 00:59:59,192
because they were helpful when we needed them.

1640
00:59:59,431 --> 01:00:01,516
Right? I need. I had a look life

1641
01:00:01,516 --> 01:00:03,183
where if I didn't do it, it didn't

1642
01:00:03,183 --> 01:00:05,246
get done, and that was, like, the most

1643
01:00:05,246 --> 01:00:08,364
important shit too didn't get done. So I

1644
01:00:08,420 --> 01:00:10,752
life figure out how to just do it

1645
01:00:10,752 --> 01:00:13,150
all and be burnout out and be exhausted.

1646
01:00:13,709 --> 01:00:16,186
But here I am no longer in that

1647
01:00:16,186 --> 01:00:19,791
kind of situation, and I still fall back

1648
01:00:19,791 --> 01:00:21,168
on that coping mechanism,

1649
01:00:21,784 --> 01:00:24,493
but it's no longer helpful. Yeah. And and,

1650
01:00:24,573 --> 01:00:27,219
you know, I... I have gotten better about

1651
01:00:27,219 --> 01:00:28,575
it. Still have a long way to go.

1652
01:00:30,649 --> 01:00:32,882
I am not always the best at asking

1653
01:00:32,882 --> 01:00:35,036
for help myself. No. For your own reasons

1654
01:00:35,036 --> 01:00:36,644
that are not that much different than mine.

1655
01:00:36,883 --> 01:00:39,910
Yeah. You know. And yeah, It it was

1656
01:00:39,910 --> 01:00:41,104
just recently that

1657
01:00:42,697 --> 01:00:43,197
I

1658
01:00:44,863 --> 01:00:46,937
had come to find out that a good

1659
01:00:46,937 --> 01:00:48,851
part of that it can be trauma related.

1660
01:00:49,011 --> 01:00:50,787
Mh. Mh. And

1661
01:00:51,164 --> 01:00:53,398
after hearing that, I I kinda started looking

1662
01:00:53,398 --> 01:00:54,409
back at my life and

1663
01:00:55,721 --> 01:00:56,039
Oh.

1664
01:00:57,708 --> 01:00:59,775
Sometimes you could pinpoint, the exact moment that

1665
01:00:59,775 --> 01:01:02,239
got hard coded into you. Yeah. You know,

1666
01:01:02,556 --> 01:01:04,963
asking for help is not just... Go ahead.

1667
01:01:05,123 --> 01:01:06,801
I'm sorry. And and, you know, there there

1668
01:01:06,801 --> 01:01:08,100
was a a certain

1669
01:01:08,480 --> 01:01:10,498
aspect of it too because in

1670
01:01:10,877 --> 01:01:11,697
in past

1671
01:01:12,235 --> 01:01:12,556
relationships,

1672
01:01:14,562 --> 01:01:16,391
even if I did ask for help,

1673
01:01:17,345 --> 01:01:18,560
I was just

1674
01:01:19,173 --> 01:01:20,684
dismissed. Sure. It's sure sure.

1675
01:01:21,735 --> 01:01:23,255
No. But you have...

1676
01:01:23,974 --> 01:01:25,655
See, I think you kind of have a

1677
01:01:25,655 --> 01:01:27,175
cheat code, and I think more dom with

1678
01:01:27,175 --> 01:01:28,775
service submissive have a cheat code that they

1679
01:01:28,775 --> 01:01:29,255
don't know about.

1680
01:01:30,224 --> 01:01:31,495
You don't ask me for help.

1681
01:01:32,289 --> 01:01:33,163
You don't use those words?

1682
01:01:33,958 --> 01:01:35,864
Not you rarely use those words. Do you

1683
01:01:35,864 --> 01:01:37,690
know what you do? I have a task

1684
01:01:37,690 --> 01:01:38,484
for you, baby girl?

1685
01:01:39,374 --> 01:01:40,729
You know what I'm fucking doing in that

1686
01:01:40,729 --> 01:01:43,359
house. I'm helping him. But he didn't have

1687
01:01:43,359 --> 01:01:46,070
to use the words help. He didn't actually

1688
01:01:46,070 --> 01:01:48,789
have tasks. That is not... Fucking criticism. That's

1689
01:01:48,789 --> 01:01:51,885
another coping skill. That's a way to get

1690
01:01:51,885 --> 01:01:53,154
the thing you need,

1691
01:01:53,710 --> 01:01:55,634
but avoid the part of it. That's hard

1692
01:01:55,634 --> 01:01:58,430
for you. Y'all use it. Make it a

1693
01:01:58,430 --> 01:01:58,989
check code.

1694
01:01:59,949 --> 01:02:00,748
Dom okay.

1695
01:02:01,946 --> 01:02:04,057
Because here's the thing everything you've ever

1696
01:02:04,829 --> 01:02:06,498
asked me to do as a task for

1697
01:02:06,498 --> 01:02:09,516
you specifically that was off the routine. Mh.

1698
01:02:09,755 --> 01:02:12,393
Was to your direct benefit. It helped you

1699
01:02:12,393 --> 01:02:13,192
in some way net.

1700
01:02:13,990 --> 01:02:16,864
You don't give me enough tasks for the

1701
01:02:16,864 --> 01:02:18,940
amount of help. I'm pretty sure you need.

1702
01:02:19,658 --> 01:02:21,748
Okay? So it's not like a per big

1703
01:02:21,748 --> 01:02:24,960
system. No. But it is your workaround where

1704
01:02:25,018 --> 01:02:26,613
you get the same outcome. You got some

1705
01:02:26,613 --> 01:02:29,166
help. Mh. That you got to avoid that

1706
01:02:29,166 --> 01:02:30,840
dreaded h Hard heart. Yeah.

1707
01:02:31,811 --> 01:02:35,234
Right. Now, should you practice actually asking for

1708
01:02:35,234 --> 01:02:37,940
help just like you require me to get

1709
01:02:37,940 --> 01:02:40,181
better at asking for Yes. I think you

1710
01:02:40,181 --> 01:02:40,418
should.

1711
01:02:41,132 --> 01:02:42,878
Here's the thing about asking for help is

1712
01:02:42,878 --> 01:02:43,774
not just

1713
01:02:45,971 --> 01:02:48,293
potentially part of word task. Creek can start.

1714
01:02:48,533 --> 01:02:50,130
Right? I mean, if we go back to

1715
01:02:50,130 --> 01:02:53,166
the original definition we're stealing from on Job

1716
01:02:53,166 --> 01:02:54,125
creep and roll Cr.

1717
01:02:54,857 --> 01:02:56,845
Somebody asked you for help at your job

1718
01:02:56,845 --> 01:02:59,152
and you said yes, and then that created

1719
01:02:59,152 --> 01:03:00,664
the expectation, you would always do it. Right?

1720
01:03:01,870 --> 01:03:04,014
That can happen in Power exchange 2.

1721
01:03:05,125 --> 01:03:06,871
You ask for you get asked for help,

1722
01:03:07,267 --> 01:03:08,537
you provide your help,

1723
01:03:09,109 --> 01:03:11,023
You get asked again. You say yes again,

1724
01:03:11,182 --> 01:03:13,017
and then it... The expectation is set, but

1725
01:03:13,017 --> 01:03:14,692
you haven't actually sat out and gone, hey,

1726
01:03:15,011 --> 01:03:16,527
Is this a thing you want me to

1727
01:03:16,527 --> 01:03:18,361
regularly do in our powerpoint?

1728
01:03:19,094 --> 01:03:21,411
But another thing that asking for help can

1729
01:03:21,411 --> 01:03:23,888
do if you are aware of what can

1730
01:03:23,888 --> 01:03:26,125
happen is, and I've sometimes do this.

1731
01:03:26,858 --> 01:03:29,397
With things that I can see could be

1732
01:03:29,397 --> 01:03:30,349
routine oriented,

1733
01:03:31,064 --> 01:03:32,596
that can open the

1734
01:03:33,127 --> 01:03:34,182
conversation for

1735
01:03:34,556 --> 01:03:34,714
negotiation.

1736
01:03:35,604 --> 01:03:37,282
If you came and ask, you know,

1737
01:03:38,401 --> 01:03:40,399
you asked me for help, this is not

1738
01:03:40,399 --> 01:03:42,397
power exchange for this business. You asked me

1739
01:03:42,397 --> 01:03:45,126
for help doing work resin work. On the

1740
01:03:45,126 --> 01:03:45,763
panels we sell.

1741
01:03:48,150 --> 01:03:50,695
I think within that first conversation because you

1742
01:03:50,695 --> 01:03:51,969
were explained to me what it would take.

1743
01:03:52,367 --> 01:03:53,582
I could see

1744
01:03:54,051 --> 01:03:55,320
that would be a thing that would need

1745
01:03:55,320 --> 01:03:56,986
to be repeated? What I was able to

1746
01:03:56,986 --> 01:03:58,811
do is go, is this something you want

1747
01:03:58,811 --> 01:04:00,239
me to do on a regular basis.

1748
01:04:00,874 --> 01:04:02,797
You thought you were asked skiing for 1

1749
01:04:02,797 --> 01:04:04,949
off help. Yeah. I could see where this

1750
01:04:04,949 --> 01:04:06,565
is a thing that's gonna come up

1751
01:04:06,942 --> 01:04:09,892
right. More than 1. Yeah. And so because

1752
01:04:10,051 --> 01:04:12,132
I could fore see that, you out there

1753
01:04:12,132 --> 01:04:13,800
being asked for help if you can foresee

1754
01:04:13,800 --> 01:04:15,943
this. You immediately get the opportunity to have

1755
01:04:15,943 --> 01:04:19,039
the conversation. You avoid task creep altogether, you

1756
01:04:19,039 --> 01:04:21,358
sit down and wash it out. Mh. You

1757
01:04:21,358 --> 01:04:22,709
know, is this something you would like me

1758
01:04:22,709 --> 01:04:24,458
to do more regularly for you? Would that

1759
01:04:24,458 --> 01:04:26,762
be beneficial to you? Right? And that was

1760
01:04:26,762 --> 01:04:27,135
how that

1761
01:04:27,732 --> 01:04:29,166
conversation happened. Yeah.

1762
01:04:30,999 --> 01:04:31,499
So

1763
01:04:32,831 --> 01:04:34,996
for don's out there who struggle because I

1764
01:04:34,996 --> 01:04:36,584
know you do because you send questions about

1765
01:04:36,584 --> 01:04:37,560
it? With

1766
01:04:39,204 --> 01:04:41,190
what tasks do I give a submissive of,

1767
01:04:42,063 --> 01:04:43,572
how do I set those up, How do

1768
01:04:43,651 --> 01:04:45,740
I figure that out. We've said this before.

1769
01:04:45,980 --> 01:04:47,735
1. I'm a keep on saying it. What

1770
01:04:47,735 --> 01:04:49,172
would you like help with? What when do

1771
01:04:49,172 --> 01:04:51,028
you have to do routinely that you

1772
01:04:51,566 --> 01:04:51,806
dread?

1773
01:04:52,619 --> 01:04:53,658
That you struggle with,

1774
01:04:54,377 --> 01:04:55,975
that if you did not have to think

1775
01:04:55,975 --> 01:04:58,213
about it much anymore, your life would be

1776
01:04:58,213 --> 01:04:59,012
a little bit better.

1777
01:05:00,450 --> 01:05:02,373
You ask for help, and you can you

1778
01:05:02,373 --> 01:05:04,119
can start it with, will you help me

1779
01:05:04,119 --> 01:05:05,229
with this and see if they're even willing

1780
01:05:05,229 --> 01:05:06,340
to do it and can do it and

1781
01:05:06,340 --> 01:05:07,634
you like the way they can do it

1782
01:05:07,927 --> 01:05:09,849
and let it lead into the converse conversation,

1783
01:05:10,809 --> 01:05:11,309
or

1784
01:05:11,849 --> 01:05:13,449
instead saying I have a task. I wanna

1785
01:05:13,449 --> 01:05:15,289
set rules. I wanna... You can have that

1786
01:05:15,289 --> 01:05:16,730
conversation, but if that is a struggle, say,

1787
01:05:16,889 --> 01:05:17,849
I need your help with something.

1788
01:05:18,664 --> 01:05:20,345
But I need that help on a consistent

1789
01:05:20,345 --> 01:05:21,465
on going basis.

1790
01:05:21,945 --> 01:05:23,864
It becomes a task. It becomes part of

1791
01:05:23,864 --> 01:05:25,704
your protocol. It becomes a routine,

1792
01:05:26,197 --> 01:05:27,868
Next thing you know if it has meaning

1793
01:05:27,868 --> 01:05:29,141
to 1 or both you, it's part of

1794
01:05:29,141 --> 01:05:29,777
your power strange.

1795
01:05:30,493 --> 01:05:33,454
True. And you avoided the creep pass greek

1796
01:05:33,454 --> 01:05:35,610
part. Might just fucking having the conversation. Just

1797
01:05:35,610 --> 01:05:37,768
talk. Yeah. At the front. But if you're

1798
01:05:37,768 --> 01:05:39,605
are... If you're thinking about the concept of

1799
01:05:39,605 --> 01:05:41,766
task and you're looking around your power change

1800
01:05:41,766 --> 01:05:42,322
going, oh,

1801
01:05:42,958 --> 01:05:44,229
I can relate to some of that.

1802
01:05:45,738 --> 01:05:48,854
The easiest way is just to to go

1803
01:05:48,854 --> 01:05:50,213
talk to your partner now? What that might

1804
01:05:50,213 --> 01:05:51,491
look like is, can we talk about it

1805
01:05:51,491 --> 01:05:52,769
right now? Or can we set a time

1806
01:05:52,769 --> 01:05:53,968
to talk about it or when can we

1807
01:05:53,968 --> 01:05:54,447
talk about this?

1808
01:05:55,567 --> 01:05:56,067
And

1809
01:05:56,845 --> 01:05:59,496
assume you're not in toxic relationship where you

1810
01:05:59,496 --> 01:06:01,413
both actually kind of hate 1 another.

1811
01:06:02,532 --> 01:06:03,351
I think

1812
01:06:03,730 --> 01:06:06,785
you kinda start off in the... Maybe you

1813
01:06:06,785 --> 01:06:09,285
probably haven't noticed that I've done this or

1814
01:06:09,585 --> 01:06:11,425
maybe you thought we had this conversation, but

1815
01:06:11,425 --> 01:06:11,985
we didn't...

1816
01:06:12,704 --> 01:06:14,793
I'd just like to formal it. Because then

1817
01:06:14,793 --> 01:06:15,690
in in those

1818
01:06:16,063 --> 01:06:17,570
negotiations, you can do that back and forth

1819
01:06:17,570 --> 01:06:19,634
of. I've done it this way for you,

1820
01:06:20,427 --> 01:06:22,356
non un renegotiate and

1821
01:06:22,744 --> 01:06:24,407
here's what works and here's what doesn't. Right?

1822
01:06:25,041 --> 01:06:27,101
I'm happy to do this part, but can

1823
01:06:27,101 --> 01:06:30,446
we modify that part. Right? Maybe you share

1824
01:06:30,446 --> 01:06:32,751
some of the the effort and the work

1825
01:06:32,751 --> 01:06:34,896
and the burden. Maybe you don't. Maybe your

1826
01:06:34,896 --> 01:06:36,407
partner goes, yeah. You've been doing that for

1827
01:06:36,407 --> 01:06:38,252
me and I appreciate it, but fucking meet

1828
01:06:38,252 --> 01:06:39,527
that. Like, you don't have to do it

1829
01:06:39,527 --> 01:06:41,997
at all. Right? You don't know until you

1830
01:06:41,997 --> 01:06:44,489
have the conversation. Right? And

1831
01:06:45,279 --> 01:06:48,716
of the 10000000 signs over 401

1832
01:06:48,716 --> 01:06:51,113
episodes now that we've probably shared of how

1833
01:06:51,113 --> 01:06:53,111
to kinda tell you're dealing with a Dud

1834
01:06:53,111 --> 01:06:53,511
partner.

1835
01:06:54,964 --> 01:06:57,598
If if they don't care that you've experienced

1836
01:06:57,758 --> 01:06:59,753
Task creep, if they don't care to fix

1837
01:06:59,753 --> 01:07:01,909
it. If they don't wanna have the conversation,

1838
01:07:02,228 --> 01:07:03,207
if they act

1839
01:07:04,237 --> 01:07:06,958
put out that a thing you never actually

1840
01:07:07,173 --> 01:07:09,077
negotiated and agreed to, you're coming to them

1841
01:07:09,077 --> 01:07:10,664
and would like to alter it or make

1842
01:07:10,664 --> 01:07:12,117
it formal. If they

1843
01:07:12,902 --> 01:07:14,969
are shitty about it. I feel like you

1844
01:07:14,969 --> 01:07:16,480
know some shit now about them.

1845
01:07:17,275 --> 01:07:17,775
Because.

1846
01:07:19,182 --> 01:07:21,026
None of us have are should be expected

1847
01:07:21,026 --> 01:07:23,569
to be perfect partners, but healthy partners partners

1848
01:07:23,569 --> 01:07:25,318
who are putting in legitimate effort.

1849
01:07:26,589 --> 01:07:28,894
They want you to negotiate this. They want

1850
01:07:28,894 --> 01:07:29,664
there to have been

1851
01:07:30,421 --> 01:07:33,365
conversation about it. They want you to want

1852
01:07:33,365 --> 01:07:34,081
to do the things.

1853
01:07:35,116 --> 01:07:37,344
Maybe not because you're excited about the task

1854
01:07:37,344 --> 01:07:39,588
because it has meaning for you because it

1855
01:07:39,588 --> 01:07:41,445
makes you feel good in some way because

1856
01:07:41,663 --> 01:07:43,259
whatever. You know it helps your partner. Like,

1857
01:07:43,419 --> 01:07:44,935
whatever the thing is is that makes you

1858
01:07:44,935 --> 01:07:46,552
all warm and gooey and inside

1859
01:07:47,819 --> 01:07:49,804
the kind of partner you want long term

1860
01:07:49,804 --> 01:07:50,756
wants that for you.

1861
01:07:52,105 --> 01:07:53,375
So they're not gonna, like,

1862
01:07:54,819 --> 01:07:56,518
try to get out of just having a

1863
01:07:56,578 --> 01:07:58,256
conversation even if it means a thing you

1864
01:07:58,256 --> 01:07:59,076
did for them

1865
01:07:59,534 --> 01:08:01,932
non negotiated, you don't do for them anymore.

1866
01:08:03,051 --> 01:08:05,003
And, you know, it goes back to

1867
01:08:05,376 --> 01:08:07,280
pay attention to how that person responds when

1868
01:08:07,280 --> 01:08:09,977
you say no, because that'll tilt... That will

1869
01:08:09,977 --> 01:08:11,898
tell you every fucking thing. Not tell you

1870
01:08:11,898 --> 01:08:14,634
that right now. Well, assuming they're not some

1871
01:08:14,693 --> 01:08:16,470
gross snake in the grass who

1872
01:08:16,928 --> 01:08:19,882
is professional liar. That's different. Most people aren't

1873
01:08:19,882 --> 01:08:20,201
like that.

1874
01:08:21,255 --> 01:08:21,755
So

1875
01:08:22,691 --> 01:08:24,207
I think that's Task creep.

1876
01:08:25,963 --> 01:08:28,278
Here's the thing. We hit the 07:20

1877
01:08:28,278 --> 01:08:30,369
mark, and I want, U0I

1878
01:08:30,369 --> 01:08:32,050
might not have a lot to say about

1879
01:08:32,050 --> 01:08:32,289
this.

1880
01:08:33,489 --> 01:08:35,250
We got into the communication side.

1881
01:08:37,010 --> 01:08:38,944
I always have things to say. Very go.

1882
01:08:39,343 --> 01:08:41,417
So all that being said, if you don't

1883
01:08:41,417 --> 01:08:42,932
have anything else you'd like to add,

1884
01:08:44,368 --> 01:08:46,202
we can do about section. Okay. So are

1885
01:08:46,202 --> 01:08:47,399
we good? I don't know.

1886
01:08:49,484 --> 01:08:49,984
Keep

1887
01:08:50,359 --> 01:08:52,583
y'all. And we will not see you next

1888
01:08:52,583 --> 01:08:54,252
week. We'll see you in 2 weeks.

1889
01:09:06,099 --> 01:09:08,171
Yes Big. Can we talk to the crickets,

1890
01:09:08,330 --> 01:09:09,287
please? Sure.

1891
01:09:09,844 --> 01:09:10,163
Okay.

1892
01:09:11,215 --> 01:09:13,132
What do you wanna talk about? Oh, I'm

1893
01:09:13,132 --> 01:09:14,810
just counting on you to have something. Well,

1894
01:09:15,130 --> 01:09:17,287
for the Youtube folks, I've already bitch about

1895
01:09:17,287 --> 01:09:19,938
how? I'm very excited my mother's coming. But

1896
01:09:19,938 --> 01:09:21,233
also, it is stressful

1897
01:09:21,846 --> 01:09:24,313
because people who love a plan still won't

1898
01:09:24,313 --> 01:09:26,142
make a plan. I don't understand that I.

1899
01:09:26,301 --> 01:09:26,595
I'm

1900
01:09:27,748 --> 01:09:29,100
Here's the thing... You know what it is.

1901
01:09:29,339 --> 01:09:33,157
We also are raging people please who don't

1902
01:09:33,157 --> 01:09:34,309
want to

1903
01:09:34,848 --> 01:09:36,845
step on the toes of a offend or

1904
01:09:36,845 --> 01:09:40,042
in any way, annoy each other, and we

1905
01:09:40,042 --> 01:09:41,880
mean the 3 of us... None of us

1906
01:09:41,880 --> 01:09:44,632
are afraid of offend our partners

1907
01:09:45,011 --> 01:09:47,648
or annoying them. We kind of revel in

1908
01:09:47,648 --> 01:09:47,728
it.

1909
01:09:49,086 --> 01:09:51,492
Mh. Look, the Sas had to come from

1910
01:09:51,492 --> 01:09:51,890
somewhere.

1911
01:09:52,527 --> 01:09:54,754
Yeah. I know. I... Oh I'd I... It

1912
01:09:54,754 --> 01:09:56,903
runs a deep. But it is 1 of

1913
01:09:56,903 --> 01:09:57,640
the most

1914
01:09:58,493 --> 01:09:58,993
annoying

1915
01:09:59,622 --> 01:10:02,645
factors of a family visit when the sisters

1916
01:10:02,645 --> 01:10:04,953
get together. Now here's the thing here... And

1917
01:10:05,192 --> 01:10:06,439
I don't know if anybody else can relate

1918
01:10:06,638 --> 01:10:06,797
this.

1919
01:10:07,511 --> 01:10:10,610
I know. I'm a 44 year old grown

1920
01:10:10,610 --> 01:10:14,043
ass woman with 2 children, my own fucking

1921
01:10:14,043 --> 01:10:14,543
business

1922
01:10:15,320 --> 01:10:16,676
who pays her own mortgage.

1923
01:10:17,953 --> 01:10:20,368
And yet, I do not

1924
01:10:21,318 --> 01:10:22,826
feel like, and you can tell me because

1925
01:10:22,826 --> 01:10:24,730
you've watched the... Mh, the dynamics.

1926
01:10:25,604 --> 01:10:27,429
I do not feel like I could tell

1927
01:10:27,429 --> 01:10:29,413
these women who are 20 years older than

1928
01:10:29,413 --> 01:10:29,572
me,

1929
01:10:30,784 --> 01:10:32,784
what I think we ought to do and

1930
01:10:32,784 --> 01:10:34,404
they would accept it because

1931
01:10:35,264 --> 01:10:37,264
both my mother and my aunt.

1932
01:10:38,304 --> 01:10:40,560
I have 44 years. Oh y'all, and they

1933
01:10:40,560 --> 01:10:41,920
still like to tell the stories of when

1934
01:10:42,079 --> 01:10:44,720
I was a little kid in diapers. I

1935
01:10:44,720 --> 01:10:46,239
that's just... I think that's just a common

1936
01:10:46,239 --> 01:10:48,248
thing they still see it that way. So

1937
01:10:48,408 --> 01:10:50,561
I hesitate. Like, I know what I'd like

1938
01:10:50,561 --> 01:10:51,917
to tell them to do look. You're gonna

1939
01:10:51,917 --> 01:10:53,034
go to your house. I'm a go to

1940
01:10:53,034 --> 01:10:54,709
mine. I'll see you for dinner at your

1941
01:10:54,709 --> 01:10:57,592
house on these days, After that, I don't

1942
01:10:57,592 --> 01:10:59,582
fucking care. Like, that's what I would say.

1943
01:11:02,606 --> 01:11:04,292
But I don't think they would. Up that

1944
01:11:04,292 --> 01:11:06,858
for me. Probably not. M. No. M.

1945
01:11:07,788 --> 01:11:08,606
No. M.

1946
01:11:08,980 --> 01:11:10,728
But now they've accepted it for me when

1947
01:11:10,807 --> 01:11:10,966
I've...

1948
01:11:11,617 --> 01:11:13,525
Because you got that dom voice and you

1949
01:11:13,525 --> 01:11:16,069
are their age. You are in between my

1950
01:11:16,069 --> 01:11:18,533
aunt and my mom. Yeah. He's 1 year

1951
01:11:18,533 --> 01:11:19,646
younger than my mom young.

1952
01:11:23,172 --> 01:11:25,409
Yeah. Well, part of that is I like

1953
01:11:25,409 --> 01:11:27,167
older partners. And part of that is my

1954
01:11:27,167 --> 01:11:28,926
mother was only 19 when I was born

1955
01:11:28,926 --> 01:11:29,645
so. Yeah.

1956
01:11:30,299 --> 01:11:31,489
It would act to me. It would be

1957
01:11:31,489 --> 01:11:32,839
weirder if you were older than her.

1958
01:11:33,632 --> 01:11:34,132
It's

1959
01:11:34,664 --> 01:11:36,728
think okay. Think that would make me go.

1960
01:11:39,998 --> 01:11:41,667
But you have... You know, first of all,

1961
01:11:41,826 --> 01:11:43,891
they give you that respect of knowing y'all

1962
01:11:43,891 --> 01:11:46,196
are all the same generation. Y'all within 2

1963
01:11:46,196 --> 01:11:48,916
years of like whatever you're right in the

1964
01:11:48,916 --> 01:11:49,076
middle.

1965
01:11:50,831 --> 01:11:52,027
Part of that is,

1966
01:11:53,622 --> 01:11:54,340
you are...

1967
01:11:55,696 --> 01:11:56,813
You doing this with a lot of people

1968
01:11:56,892 --> 01:11:57,690
I don't think you realize.

1969
01:11:59,850 --> 01:12:02,471
When the people in who are closest to

1970
01:12:02,471 --> 01:12:04,377
you in your life, figure out that they

1971
01:12:04,377 --> 01:12:05,648
can trust to you and that you're 1

1972
01:12:05,648 --> 01:12:06,719
of their peeps people

1973
01:12:07,336 --> 01:12:09,887
you you just have their confidence. Like, my

1974
01:12:09,887 --> 01:12:12,520
mother who trusts no fucking body. Had to

1975
01:12:12,520 --> 01:12:13,636
get that from somewhere too.

1976
01:12:14,514 --> 01:12:17,083
You tell her to journal she will almost

1977
01:12:17,083 --> 01:12:18,921
ask How high. She will at least say

1978
01:12:18,921 --> 01:12:20,519
in what direction. Point me in the right

1979
01:12:20,519 --> 01:12:22,516
direction I got this. Right? Like, you just

1980
01:12:22,516 --> 01:12:24,448
have that air about you. You have that,

1981
01:12:24,767 --> 01:12:27,798
they you inspire that level of confidence, at

1982
01:12:27,798 --> 01:12:29,393
least in my family. Mh.

1983
01:12:30,430 --> 01:12:31,945
I know you're thinking of your family like,

1984
01:12:32,503 --> 01:12:33,221
ma'am. Yeah.

1985
01:12:34,271 --> 01:12:36,255
Sure how mess anyway, but, yeah but, yeah,

1986
01:12:36,493 --> 01:12:38,239
Like... But you also have that big d

1987
01:12:38,239 --> 01:12:38,477
voice.

1988
01:12:40,222 --> 01:12:42,048
Look, this is... I mean, I know where

1989
01:12:42,048 --> 01:12:43,734
wearing bonus action, and this is probably in

1990
01:12:43,734 --> 01:12:45,109
the realm of

1991
01:12:45,644 --> 01:12:46,997
education. I need to know.

1992
01:12:48,351 --> 01:12:50,261
In your opinion from your experience, so we're

1993
01:12:50,261 --> 01:12:52,338
not speak for all dom out there. Mh.

1994
01:12:52,972 --> 01:12:54,265
Is the dom voice

1995
01:12:54,795 --> 01:12:57,330
something you're born with or you just learn?

1996
01:12:58,537 --> 01:12:59,334
Or combo,

1997
01:13:01,327 --> 01:13:03,637
because it's your fern stern voice is what

1998
01:13:03,637 --> 01:13:04,912
it is. You know, I...

1999
01:13:07,802 --> 01:13:09,560
I think it just kinda kicks in when

2000
01:13:09,560 --> 01:13:09,880
need.

2001
01:13:11,637 --> 01:13:12,836
Choke on a fucking straw.

2002
01:13:16,046 --> 01:13:18,603
And with 3 unruly women in the house

2003
01:13:18,603 --> 01:13:19,801
going, I don't know what do you wanna

2004
01:13:19,801 --> 01:13:21,100
do? I don't know any

2005
01:13:21,972 --> 01:13:23,506
I don't know how you put up a

2006
01:13:23,801 --> 01:13:25,789
gotta fucking make his decision. Look. You wanna

2007
01:13:25,789 --> 01:13:27,300
know how he puts up with us? He

2008
01:13:27,300 --> 01:13:29,924
goes, no no. You go spend the whole

2009
01:13:29,924 --> 01:13:31,037
day with your mother.

2010
01:13:31,609 --> 01:13:33,597
I'm gonna stay here You Nope. Nope. I

2011
01:13:33,597 --> 01:13:34,631
don't wanna go to lunch. You don't have

2012
01:13:34,631 --> 01:13:36,618
to bring me anything back. Nope. I gotta

2013
01:13:36,618 --> 01:13:38,925
self new hair. Right. I'm gonna... Yeah. I

2014
01:13:38,925 --> 01:13:40,118
don't... No. You don't have to tell me

2015
01:13:40,118 --> 01:13:42,119
how long you're gonna be gone. Just just

2016
01:13:42,119 --> 01:13:42,619
go

2017
01:13:43,550 --> 01:13:45,774
get in the car, enjoy yourself. Have have...

2018
01:13:46,251 --> 01:13:49,110
Spend... Spend some quality your on.

2019
01:13:50,634 --> 01:13:52,856
Man. Me and my mom together just the

2020
01:13:53,015 --> 01:13:53,490
2 us.

2021
01:13:54,284 --> 01:13:57,301
We are enough a like that decision making

2022
01:13:57,301 --> 01:13:57,935
is easier.

2023
01:13:59,141 --> 01:14:01,153
We're also not afraid to offend each other

2024
01:14:01,608 --> 01:14:02,108
because

2025
01:14:02,483 --> 01:14:05,187
without the buffer of her visiting her sister,

2026
01:14:05,346 --> 01:14:07,517
my aunt at the same time, she and

2027
01:14:07,597 --> 01:14:09,754
I can handle 1 another for about 48

2028
01:14:09,754 --> 01:14:10,552
to 72 hours.

2029
01:14:11,351 --> 01:14:13,682
And then we're done. Done. Yeah done. We've

2030
01:14:13,682 --> 01:14:15,759
had we've talked all we can talk. We've

2031
01:14:15,759 --> 01:14:16,796
done all we can do.

2032
01:14:17,515 --> 01:14:18,633
We need separate corners now.

2033
01:14:19,830 --> 01:14:22,225
But we stretch that out because she stays

2034
01:14:22,225 --> 01:14:23,356
at my end. House,

2035
01:14:23,912 --> 01:14:26,242
and then comes here and she comes here

2036
01:14:26,378 --> 01:14:27,095
to get peace.

2037
01:14:28,128 --> 01:14:30,530
I my aunt, lets her cut here, so

2038
01:14:30,530 --> 01:14:33,393
she could get peace and... Right. It somehow

2039
01:14:33,393 --> 01:14:35,779
works. But, yeah. Yep. Yep. So, yeah, that's

2040
01:14:35,779 --> 01:14:37,607
the thing coming up next week, But day

2041
01:14:37,607 --> 01:14:39,061
after this recording Thursday,

2042
01:14:40,007 --> 01:14:41,675
we have got to clean this house from

2043
01:14:41,675 --> 01:14:42,390
top to bottom. Yeah.

2044
01:14:43,502 --> 01:14:45,487
I am both dread it because I'm fucking

2045
01:14:45,487 --> 01:14:46,042
hate cleaning.

2046
01:14:46,916 --> 01:14:47,471
And also,

2047
01:14:48,028 --> 01:14:49,792
it's 1 of those things I don't want

2048
01:14:49,792 --> 01:14:52,182
to clean, but I want to have the

2049
01:14:52,182 --> 01:14:52,979
cleaning done.

2050
01:14:53,617 --> 01:14:56,007
And so I I know.

2051
01:14:57,059 --> 01:14:58,574
I will be very happy when it is

2052
01:14:58,574 --> 01:15:00,807
done after I take a shower and get

2053
01:15:00,807 --> 01:15:03,121
the sweat off of me. Have clean clothes

2054
01:15:03,121 --> 01:15:04,875
on again because I'll be like, oh, look

2055
01:15:04,875 --> 01:15:05,673
at my house.

2056
01:15:07,201 --> 01:15:09,744
I have my whole adult life have felt

2057
01:15:09,744 --> 01:15:12,764
so guilty about my lack of desire to

2058
01:15:12,764 --> 01:15:14,830
clean because my lack of desire means lack

2059
01:15:14,830 --> 01:15:17,000
of action. If I don't wanna fucking do

2060
01:15:17,000 --> 01:15:17,159
it.

2061
01:15:18,600 --> 01:15:20,280
Oh, unless you're paying me for it or

2062
01:15:20,280 --> 01:15:21,800
you're my daddy and you tell me I

2063
01:15:21,800 --> 01:15:22,439
have to.

2064
01:15:23,239 --> 01:15:24,280
I don't usually do it.

2065
01:15:25,330 --> 01:15:27,342
Which is actually part of the

2066
01:15:27,718 --> 01:15:29,310
topic that we'll do the week we come

2067
01:15:29,310 --> 01:15:30,662
back. I've already gotten that prepped.

2068
01:15:32,493 --> 01:15:32,970
But

2069
01:15:34,658 --> 01:15:37,529
the the cleaning 1, I I've always felt

2070
01:15:37,529 --> 01:15:39,125
guilty about it because I was raised with

2071
01:15:39,125 --> 01:15:40,321
a clean freak mom. Like,

2072
01:15:41,438 --> 01:15:43,591
her house has her, and the evil step,

2073
01:15:43,751 --> 01:15:46,070
not pet, not a child, not nothing. Mh.

2074
01:15:46,229 --> 01:15:48,136
And she mop every day. Y'all.

2075
01:15:49,408 --> 01:15:50,917
They're not tracking in mud at that house

2076
01:15:50,917 --> 01:15:52,665
either. She mop everything day eat off the.

2077
01:15:52,918 --> 01:15:53,554
Floor Yes.

2078
01:15:54,349 --> 01:15:56,811
And I am not like that. But part

2079
01:15:56,811 --> 01:15:57,470
of it

2080
01:15:58,559 --> 01:15:59,536
is that I

2081
01:16:00,640 --> 01:16:01,037
cleaning,

2082
01:16:01,990 --> 01:16:02,490
anything.

2083
01:16:02,944 --> 01:16:05,725
Anything. Mh. Feels like the most inefficient thing

2084
01:16:05,725 --> 01:16:07,155
you can do why because you will clean

2085
01:16:07,155 --> 01:16:09,079
a thing. You will clean it, it will

2086
01:16:09,079 --> 01:16:11,159
look beautiful. I'm only gonna get dirty again.

2087
01:16:11,640 --> 01:16:13,000
And you have to clean it so get

2088
01:16:13,000 --> 01:16:14,119
it didn't. Because you don't... I get it.

2089
01:16:14,280 --> 01:16:16,119
You don't want things to stay dirty. That

2090
01:16:16,119 --> 01:16:17,800
can be broke fast. Like, I get it.

2091
01:16:18,213 --> 01:16:19,327
But my brain goes,

2092
01:16:20,679 --> 01:16:22,827
I have to keep doing this thing. Oh,

2093
01:16:22,986 --> 01:16:24,202
it's already the most

2094
01:16:24,656 --> 01:16:26,485
boring thing I can think of. It is...

2095
01:16:26,899 --> 01:16:29,537
Also on top of that, the most inefficient

2096
01:16:29,537 --> 01:16:29,777
thing.

2097
01:16:30,895 --> 01:16:31,395
Ever.

2098
01:16:32,334 --> 01:16:34,252
You mean I have to just keep doing

2099
01:16:34,252 --> 01:16:35,072
it forever.

2100
01:16:35,930 --> 01:16:36,545
Nothing just

2101
01:16:37,225 --> 01:16:39,784
stays clean, and I know that, of course,

2102
01:16:40,024 --> 01:16:42,505
that's how the world works. With man.

2103
01:16:42,984 --> 01:16:44,438
If you're gonna ask me if about got

2104
01:16:44,438 --> 01:16:45,948
any fucking motivation to do.

2105
01:16:48,175 --> 01:16:50,162
Okay. Y'all. I'm probably gonna grow some clean

2106
01:16:50,162 --> 01:16:52,707
freak out out there. Completely out. You're gonna

2107
01:16:52,707 --> 01:16:54,634
be like, oh, my god. I Don't worry.

2108
01:16:54,793 --> 01:16:56,391
You never will come to my house and

2109
01:16:56,391 --> 01:16:57,670
never have to use any of my stuff.

2110
01:16:57,909 --> 01:16:59,587
The the night... Oh 0 god he's not

2111
01:16:59,587 --> 01:17:01,505
19 yet. The 18 year old texted it.

2112
01:17:02,078 --> 01:17:04,469
He started to lean into the... There are

2113
01:17:04,469 --> 01:17:05,505
adult things. I don't know how to do.

2114
01:17:05,663 --> 01:17:06,381
Let me ask my mom.

2115
01:17:07,417 --> 01:17:09,408
He texted me and went, how often should

2116
01:17:09,408 --> 01:17:12,210
you wash your shower curtain? And I went.

2117
01:17:13,242 --> 01:17:15,307
No. Think that's a thing I'm supposed to

2118
01:17:15,307 --> 01:17:17,134
know, but my my rule of thumb has

2119
01:17:17,134 --> 01:17:18,961
been when it gets gross enough that I

2120
01:17:18,961 --> 01:17:20,628
notice. It's time to wash it,

2121
01:17:21,996 --> 01:17:23,429
And so we talked about how you do

2122
01:17:23,429 --> 01:17:24,863
that. Now. I'm, like, I know how to

2123
01:17:24,863 --> 01:17:25,420
do these things.

2124
01:17:26,375 --> 01:17:28,684
So he called right after he texted and

2125
01:17:28,684 --> 01:17:29,162
we're talking.

2126
01:17:29,734 --> 01:17:30,453
And he goes,

2127
01:17:32,052 --> 01:17:33,650
he goes... He said something, and I went

2128
01:17:33,650 --> 01:17:35,088
no. You don't understand.

2129
01:17:36,367 --> 01:17:38,045
I said, I didn't know until the Internet.

2130
01:17:38,219 --> 01:17:39,731
Taught me in the past 2 years that

2131
01:17:39,731 --> 01:17:42,039
you could wash in the washing machine, the

2132
01:17:42,039 --> 01:17:44,189
plastic liner to your shocker. I y'all.

2133
01:17:44,984 --> 01:17:47,292
I did not know that because when I

2134
01:17:47,292 --> 01:17:48,662
was growing up, we were too fucking poor

2135
01:17:48,662 --> 01:17:51,215
for a liner. The liner was our shower

2136
01:17:51,215 --> 01:17:54,006
curtain what you're talking about. And my mother

2137
01:17:54,006 --> 01:17:56,079
cleaned that thing daily. So I didn't know

2138
01:17:56,079 --> 01:17:57,595
you could throw it in washing machine. Mh.

2139
01:17:58,168 --> 01:18:00,502
I said, dude, do you have no idea

2140
01:18:00,798 --> 01:18:01,298
how

2141
01:18:01,675 --> 01:18:02,949
many years I spent,

2142
01:18:03,587 --> 01:18:05,180
not no 1 I could clean the thing?

2143
01:18:05,993 --> 01:18:08,229
Waiting for it to get so gross. I

2144
01:18:08,229 --> 01:18:09,686
didn't want it to touch me

2145
01:18:10,225 --> 01:18:12,960
to throw it away. It was clearly done

2146
01:18:13,178 --> 01:18:14,056
to go fine.

2147
01:18:17,821 --> 01:18:20,554
I'm I'm better now y'all. The shower curtain

2148
01:18:21,011 --> 01:18:22,606
for the 1 shower curtain we have because

2149
01:18:22,606 --> 01:18:24,814
our our shower has a door. It gets

2150
01:18:24,934 --> 01:18:26,471
washed, semi humor.

2151
01:18:28,127 --> 01:18:29,722
Usually, when I think my mother is gonna

2152
01:18:29,722 --> 01:18:31,159
see it. And I'm like, oh no.

2153
01:18:33,569 --> 01:18:34,869
Am I proud

2154
01:18:35,250 --> 01:18:36,529
of that? No.

2155
01:18:37,250 --> 01:18:38,550
Is it reality

2156
01:18:39,010 --> 01:18:39,489
Yes.

2157
01:18:39,890 --> 01:18:43,338
Look, everybody has their strengths and everybody has

2158
01:18:43,338 --> 01:18:46,996
their challenges and opportunities or weaknesses, However, whatever

2159
01:18:46,996 --> 01:18:48,587
corporate speak you wanna use.

2160
01:18:50,813 --> 01:18:51,711
I keep

2161
01:18:53,376 --> 01:18:54,810
I do not keep a tidy house,

2162
01:18:55,687 --> 01:18:57,600
but I hate clutter, so that's annoying.

2163
01:18:58,876 --> 01:19:00,644
I won't let our house get grow gross.

2164
01:19:00,962 --> 01:19:03,032
Jb won't let our house not gross. The

2165
01:19:03,032 --> 01:19:05,180
house is not gross. But we're not going...

2166
01:19:05,420 --> 01:19:07,728
It's not eat off the floor clean. It's

2167
01:19:07,728 --> 01:19:10,036
lived in. In. Live home is lived in.

2168
01:19:10,274 --> 01:19:11,489
Gross Yeah. I mean, it's not...

2169
01:19:12,449 --> 01:19:14,289
I mean, yeah. It's not condemn, but...

2170
01:19:15,890 --> 01:19:17,890
Look, I've had family members who had that,

2171
01:19:18,050 --> 01:19:19,890
So I know what the extreme can be.

2172
01:19:20,225 --> 01:19:22,545
Yeah. I made the decision because I don't

2173
01:19:22,545 --> 01:19:24,145
know. I've already made it clear. I'm I'm

2174
01:19:24,145 --> 01:19:26,385
not the the neat freak cruise walking around

2175
01:19:26,385 --> 01:19:27,585
cleaning her floors every day. Yeah.

2176
01:19:29,034 --> 01:19:31,425
The moment I had the first kid. I

2177
01:19:31,425 --> 01:19:34,292
went. Oh, we're... I'm not fighting this. We're

2178
01:19:34,292 --> 01:19:35,806
gonna keep it clean enough that it's not...

2179
01:19:36,125 --> 01:19:38,445
There's no need for hazmat. Suits, we're gonna

2180
01:19:38,445 --> 01:19:41,484
let these children get out before I worry

2181
01:19:41,539 --> 01:19:44,078
about how neat and tidy anything is. So

2182
01:19:44,078 --> 01:19:46,319
we... I still... I'm not worried about having

2183
01:19:46,319 --> 01:19:48,069
super nice furniture. We have a few nice

2184
01:19:48,069 --> 01:19:49,819
pieces from when we moved in, But it

2185
01:19:49,819 --> 01:19:51,904
was because the kids were old enough. I

2186
01:19:51,904 --> 01:19:54,141
wouldn't worried about them drawing on our dining

2187
01:19:54,141 --> 01:19:56,458
room table. Right. Right. Right? But we still

2188
01:19:56,458 --> 01:19:58,696
have plenty of stuff. It's, like, we got

2189
01:19:58,696 --> 01:20:01,583
we got dog, cat and kids. Mh. The

2190
01:20:01,583 --> 01:20:03,495
couch is gonna look like shit. It'll be

2191
01:20:03,495 --> 01:20:03,814
fine.

2192
01:20:04,451 --> 01:20:06,283
Not worried about it. Yeah. Yeah. We're getting

2193
01:20:06,283 --> 01:20:07,957
to the point with with all the animals

2194
01:20:07,957 --> 01:20:09,962
in the sofa. We're gonna need AAA

2195
01:20:09,962 --> 01:20:12,587
throw to go over the Yeah cover something

2196
01:20:12,587 --> 01:20:13,699
to go over the... Yes.

2197
01:20:14,336 --> 01:20:17,039
Yeah. But that's why I'm so happy. We

2198
01:20:17,039 --> 01:20:20,078
have even though she's on the sad sad

2199
01:20:20,078 --> 01:20:20,957
end of failing.

2200
01:20:21,435 --> 01:20:23,112
We have Rosie the Roomba. Yeah.

2201
01:20:23,750 --> 01:20:24,250
Because

2202
01:20:26,224 --> 01:20:28,552
that the floors are not g task and

2203
01:20:28,552 --> 01:20:29,291
that is

2204
01:20:29,825 --> 01:20:30,325
matters.

2205
01:20:31,575 --> 01:20:33,882
But, yeah, like, look, I'm not I'm not

2206
01:20:33,882 --> 01:20:34,518
proud of it.

2207
01:20:35,409 --> 01:20:37,247
I am less ashamed than I used to

2208
01:20:37,247 --> 01:20:39,725
be. The internet showed me that there there

2209
01:20:39,725 --> 01:20:41,323
are people who are way worse than me

2210
01:20:41,323 --> 01:20:43,001
and there are people who are, like, I'm

2211
01:20:43,001 --> 01:20:44,280
on that level with them, and I'm like,

2212
01:20:44,520 --> 01:20:47,167
okay. Okay. And What... Was it show we

2213
01:20:47,167 --> 01:20:49,561
we started walking while back. Oh my god.

2214
01:20:49,801 --> 01:20:51,795
It was the was it the horror show?

2215
01:20:52,129 --> 01:20:54,039
It wasn't quarters, but it was... They they

2216
01:20:54,039 --> 01:20:56,188
were like, the the cleaners the Yeah. They

2217
01:20:56,188 --> 01:20:57,722
would go into these hoarding

2218
01:20:58,337 --> 01:21:01,042
hoarding homes Homes. And clean them out, and

2219
01:21:01,042 --> 01:21:02,654
they were, like... It they were like the

2220
01:21:02,654 --> 01:21:04,994
crew that came in in protective gear.

2221
01:21:05,854 --> 01:21:06,895
Oh my god.

2222
01:21:07,454 --> 01:21:07,694
Oh,

2223
01:21:08,414 --> 01:21:10,194
there are 2 things I've watched

2224
01:21:10,974 --> 01:21:12,506
in the past couple years that just make

2225
01:21:12,506 --> 01:21:14,737
me feel better as an adult human being.

2226
01:21:15,613 --> 01:21:18,003
1 is that show because I'm like, well.

2227
01:21:19,214 --> 01:21:20,649
You know, the thing is that that show

2228
01:21:20,649 --> 01:21:22,323
is sad though because it's usually a sign

2229
01:21:22,323 --> 01:21:25,432
of either mental health problems, mental illness or

2230
01:21:25,432 --> 01:21:27,426
physical disability. They just can't do it, and

2231
01:21:27,426 --> 01:21:29,265
they don't have help. Right. And that is

2232
01:21:29,265 --> 01:21:31,484
sad, but there's also that visceral reaction to

2233
01:21:31,563 --> 01:21:32,855
Oh god. No. At least.

2234
01:21:33,465 --> 01:21:35,024
The other thing is this

2235
01:21:35,619 --> 01:21:37,841
Youtube channel that keeps coming up in my

2236
01:21:37,841 --> 01:21:38,158
feed.

2237
01:21:39,110 --> 01:21:41,172
He's named Caleb something or other, and he

2238
01:21:41,172 --> 01:21:42,857
yells at people who are dumb about their

2239
01:21:42,857 --> 01:21:43,256
finances.

2240
01:21:43,734 --> 01:21:45,487
And again, the empathetic side of me goes,

2241
01:21:45,726 --> 01:21:48,059
clearly nobody ever taught them. Like, they

2242
01:21:48,436 --> 01:21:50,131
they they don't have

2243
01:21:50,444 --> 01:21:53,077
the education and the experience, but sometimes they

2244
01:21:53,077 --> 01:21:54,433
don't have the will to make the changes,

2245
01:21:54,832 --> 01:21:56,667
and I watch that and go okay. I'm

2246
01:21:56,667 --> 01:21:59,866
not great, money, but I'm not that. I'm

2247
01:21:59,866 --> 01:22:00,366
willing.

2248
01:22:00,821 --> 01:22:03,150
Not that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So

2249
01:22:04,320 --> 01:22:04,877
so yeah.

2250
01:22:06,150 --> 01:22:09,134
Money But, yeah. Sometimes some sometimes

2251
01:22:09,510 --> 01:22:10,863
you watch a thing then you go, okay.

2252
01:22:11,023 --> 01:22:13,172
It could be worse. Mh. And at least

2253
01:22:13,252 --> 01:22:15,495
I'm not there. Okay. Okay feel a bit

2254
01:22:15,495 --> 01:22:17,108
better. A little better. See

2255
01:22:17,800 --> 01:22:18,435
So yeah. No.

2256
01:22:19,864 --> 01:22:21,374
But, yeah, we're gonna take next week off.

2257
01:22:21,613 --> 01:22:23,775
Yeah. I We have the the live stream

2258
01:22:23,854 --> 01:22:26,003
Friday night, podcast listeners that's the day this

2259
01:22:26,003 --> 01:22:26,878
episode goes out,

2260
01:22:27,832 --> 01:22:30,555
09:30. We think 30 Pm. We're planning on

2261
01:22:30,555 --> 01:22:31,853
09:30PM because

2262
01:22:32,629 --> 01:22:35,341
neither my mom nor my aunt are the

2263
01:22:35,341 --> 01:22:37,653
type who stay at super late. Mh. We

2264
01:22:37,653 --> 01:22:39,764
expect them to be gone 9 to their

2265
01:22:40,303 --> 01:22:41,502
place. Their realm.

2266
01:22:42,381 --> 01:22:44,858
By that time. Mh. But if they somehow

2267
01:22:44,858 --> 01:22:47,256
have not yet. If we're late, we're late,

2268
01:22:47,416 --> 01:22:48,029
but we're comfortable

2269
01:22:48,627 --> 01:22:50,561
Mh. Because we don't have another

2270
01:22:51,018 --> 01:22:53,409
Friday in our schedule for this month to

2271
01:22:53,409 --> 01:22:54,286
move it to him. M.

2272
01:22:55,561 --> 01:22:57,407
And during the visit every night could be

2273
01:22:57,407 --> 01:22:58,521
like that. So we're just keeping it in

2274
01:22:58,600 --> 01:23:00,589
Friday. Yeah. And we didn't have time to

2275
01:23:00,589 --> 01:23:01,225
kind to

2276
01:23:03,055 --> 01:23:04,979
the shuffle everything wrong because it was very

2277
01:23:04,979 --> 01:23:06,730
last minute. And I knew that was gonna

2278
01:23:06,730 --> 01:23:08,481
happen this time. I knew that was gonna

2279
01:23:08,481 --> 01:23:10,789
happen. I'm just glad. I mean, we just

2280
01:23:10,789 --> 01:23:12,142
gave us 5 days now. Yeah.

2281
01:23:12,875 --> 01:23:14,074
I mean, we didn't know if it was

2282
01:23:14,074 --> 01:23:15,835
gonna be this month or next month. I

2283
01:23:15,835 --> 01:23:16,795
know. Wow,

2284
01:23:19,114 --> 01:23:21,114
And at 1 point you said this month

2285
01:23:21,114 --> 01:23:21,594
was out.

2286
01:23:22,405 --> 01:23:23,598
Right? But then it was banging.

2287
01:23:24,155 --> 01:23:25,211
Yeah. But

2288
01:23:25,665 --> 01:23:27,971
I believe she's planning on coming back at

2289
01:23:27,971 --> 01:23:28,845
the end of July.

2290
01:23:30,214 --> 01:23:30,374
Okay.

2291
01:23:31,332 --> 01:23:31,572
Okay.

2292
01:23:32,451 --> 01:23:32,771
So...

2293
01:23:35,568 --> 01:23:37,485
Actually, I really do enjoy seeing my mother.

2294
01:23:38,059 --> 01:23:40,052
I mean, like, most people, I have a

2295
01:23:40,052 --> 01:23:40,552
complicated

2296
01:23:40,930 --> 01:23:43,163
history with my mother, but, you know, I

2297
01:23:43,163 --> 01:23:44,520
love her, and I'm I'm glad to see

2298
01:23:44,520 --> 01:23:47,152
her. III like your, mom. I I yeah.

2299
01:23:47,470 --> 01:23:49,240
She's nigga is fuck, but her heart's in

2300
01:23:49,240 --> 01:23:49,878
the right place.

2301
01:23:51,314 --> 01:23:52,591
She's too much of a people please or

2302
01:23:52,591 --> 01:23:54,527
to, like, be that over bearing

2303
01:23:54,984 --> 01:23:57,796
person. She's... Mh. Also, she has

2304
01:23:58,428 --> 01:23:59,944
ben doing the work.

2305
01:24:00,662 --> 01:24:03,296
Probably since she got an Internet connection and

2306
01:24:03,296 --> 01:24:04,970
or just a phone that connected to the

2307
01:24:05,211 --> 01:24:07,135
Internet, she's been kinda doing the work to

2308
01:24:07,135 --> 01:24:07,794
un learn

2309
01:24:08,408 --> 01:24:10,317
bullshit things that she would have been taught

2310
01:24:10,317 --> 01:24:11,510
from her generation. Mh.

2311
01:24:12,957 --> 01:24:14,947
And so, you know, discovering that my mother

2312
01:24:14,947 --> 01:24:17,494
is possibly more of the growth than I

2313
01:24:17,494 --> 01:24:20,121
am was was a delight. Was a delight.

2314
01:24:23,251 --> 01:24:25,168
But, yeah, No. I mean, but it's still

2315
01:24:25,168 --> 01:24:27,725
it's an it's for we are people who...

2316
01:24:28,299 --> 01:24:29,495
You like to go out when you like

2317
01:24:29,495 --> 01:24:30,532
to go out and you like to be

2318
01:24:30,532 --> 01:24:31,808
around people when you like to be around

2319
01:24:31,808 --> 01:24:34,222
people. But there is still that thing of

2320
01:24:35,636 --> 01:24:38,005
people visiting. There's that expectation and it's...

2321
01:24:39,317 --> 01:24:42,021
It's messing up the routines. Mh. Thank god

2322
01:24:42,021 --> 01:24:43,453
we like my mom. Yeah.

2323
01:24:45,282 --> 01:24:45,782
So,

2324
01:24:46,555 --> 01:24:46,609
it's

2325
01:24:48,237 --> 01:24:49,904
Yeah, we can't say too much because we

2326
01:24:49,904 --> 01:24:52,920
gotta save something for Friday night. Night. So...

2327
01:24:53,555 --> 01:24:55,381
Yep. Also, we have time to watch an

2328
01:24:55,381 --> 01:24:55,515
episode,

2329
01:24:56,913 --> 01:24:58,192
and that is how I would like to

2330
01:24:58,192 --> 01:24:58,671
spend my.

2331
01:24:59,390 --> 01:25:00,668
So we are gonna go. Mh.

2332
01:25:01,547 --> 01:25:03,145
For anybody who maybe could relate to the

2333
01:25:03,145 --> 01:25:04,756
topic of I hope you found something helpful.

2334
01:25:04,994 --> 01:25:06,908
Mh. If it hasn't happened to you yet,

2335
01:25:07,069 --> 01:25:08,743
maybe you are now armed with the information,

2336
01:25:08,903 --> 01:25:11,614
so you can avoid task creep. Mh.

2337
01:25:13,860 --> 01:25:14,497
Wendy yeah.

2338
01:25:16,009 --> 01:25:18,555
Yeah. Yeah. I guess we can go. Okay.

2339
01:25:19,032 --> 01:25:19,988
Okay. Take a night?

2340
01:25:20,877 --> 01:25:23,096
Night. Goodbye. We're time traveling. I don't know

2341
01:25:23,096 --> 01:25:23,755
when you

2342
01:25:24,127 --> 01:25:25,475
hear us see us whatever.

2343
01:25:26,663 --> 01:25:27,932
Goodbye. Thank you for being here.

2344
01:25:28,823 --> 01:25:29,541
Appreciate the onion.