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You're listening to living Bd podcast episode 3

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90 90MJ

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almost 400. Kill here were the 1, the

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only

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the man who has way too much patience

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for my bullshit, and that's why I love

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him. John Browns stone.

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I'm glad I'm good for something. I mean,

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I'm kind of the reason we're waking up

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at 05:30 in the morning a few days

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a week. Yeah. I'm the reason we had

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to re record the intro because apparently, I

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forgot how it works. Yep.

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So, yeah. I'm just grateful you love me.

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Here we are. Here we are.

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This week is can probably tell from the

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title. We're doing a Bd

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reddit

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response.

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Will I rant? I never know until I'm

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in the middle of it.

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Sometimes, I don't think I'm ranting, but that's

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how others perceive that. Yeah. Mh. So, yeah.

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Welcome to the loving Bd and podcast podcasts.

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Of this your first time listening. Glad to

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have you. If you're back for another week.

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Welcome back. Loving Bd has produced every Monday

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and Friday for your Kinky pleasure and education

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and notes are found at loving bd m

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dot net. Come back often and feel free

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to add the podcast to your favorite podcast

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app. You can also follow the show on

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Fe life at loving bd m pc

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on Instagram and threads at that handle, I

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will forever,

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fucking hate. Loving D and the number 1

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so that's at loving d 1.

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We're on Youtube at Youtube dot com slash

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loving where you can watch us live from

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the podcast every Wednesday.

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All links are in the show notes. Okay.

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So before we get into whatever

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reddit does to my blood pressure.

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But we have we have several several announcements.

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I thought It was just gonna be 1,

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and then I realized it was 2. And

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then I realized it was 3.

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So the first is just a reminder, we

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are still... We are always, but we are

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still

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collecting questions for our Monday episodes.

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We're gonna kinda let them, like, lump up

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and then start working on them again. So

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I have a feeling will be on a

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quick break from the Monday episodes for the

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month of June. It's what I'm thinking.

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But if you have a question, you would

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like us to answer

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it's 1 of those times you can give

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a big long backstory, you can get really

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in the weeds with it. Quite frankly the

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best questions are when you give us more

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detail. I've had to reject a few recently

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that were... What amounted to basically a Google

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search, and I was like I don't. I

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don't even... Like, this would be a to

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semester college course to try to explain this

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out.

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If you have any

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situational things that you would like us to

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answer in a future,

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Monday episode. The link is in the places.

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It takes you to a page that you

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fill out the information. You can keep yourself

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anonymous, and then comes to our email, and

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I just keep it there until we're ready

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to record our answer.

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The second thing

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is that. This... This is gonna be different.

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Not usual. This Saturday.

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I wrote down the... No. I didn't write

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down the day. Right. I think it's June

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eighth. I think it's June eighth.

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We are going to do a

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live stream starting at 09:30PM

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Eastern to celebrate the fact that on Youtube,

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we hit 10000

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subscribers a few days ago. Very exciting completely

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like nothing major happens at this number. We

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were just happy to hit Yeah.

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Just an arbitrary number that we were shooting

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for. It has been teased

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to me that there might be cake.

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Has also been teased that there may be

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a little I inviting to

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loosen everything up.

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But we'll treat it like, similar to the

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way we do a Friday night livestream. We'll

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last until probably midnight.

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We'll hang out bullshit, just sorta of chill

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and celebrate the fact that some of y'all

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are like, yeah, sure. I'll let you show

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up in my Youtube subscription feed, and we

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appreciate you.

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Third announcement.

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That planning got having this announcement today, but

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then I did a thing, and I got

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really focused.

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So on our Etsy shop, 1 of the

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products that we carry a lot is meant

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to help with power exchange relationships for submissive

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training. For when a is learning new habits

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or they're trying to remember to do tasks

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that their dominant partner wants them to do.

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We...

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For make and sell

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digital

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planner sheets. So you can print them and

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use paper and pen or you can use

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them like in a digital planner.

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And we make them for submissive them for

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dominance. For submissive, we have a daily task

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planner. We have a weekly. Tracker, we have

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a monthly habit tracker. For dominance, we created

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a week, you know, daily and weekly, I

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called it an accountability,

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track so you can keep up, did my

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submissive do the damn thing

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today or this week? What it... What, am

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I expecting for my of what did actually

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get for my submissive. Are they keeping up

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with their habits over the course of a

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week or whatever. So we always have those

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or try to add new ones each month.

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Well, in May and now,

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early June.

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Doing all pride themed things that will exist

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on our Etsy shop long after pride month

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because

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any ain't just 1 month is all year

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round is all the time. But

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for

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June

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in June just today, quite frankly day of

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recording. I just uploaded

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a bunch of

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pride themed what I call bundles. So the

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submissive bundle has 2 daily track, 2 daily

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task list

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of, a week track weekly tracker in a

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monthly tracker. The dominant bundle has 2 daily

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tasks,

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sheet and a weekly tracker.

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But they are...

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I don't even know how to properly say

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it, so I hope I do not fuck

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this up. Basically, it's each of this different

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I... Some of each of the different identities

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that have pride flags. So there's

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bisexual pride flag theme. There's pans bisexual pride

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flag theme. There's asexual. There's a romantic. There's

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there's 14

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for each dom and sub. Will it be

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every single possible identity that falls within

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Lgbtq a plus, no. Because if I couldn't

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find artwork I couldn't do it. But it's

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a lot. And as I find more to

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do, I won't keep adding it. And in

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the month of June, all of our pride

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stuff, which is all digital downloads right now.

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25 percent off. Just on top. Just just

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take the 25 people to off. So that

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literally just got added day, day of recording,

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linked to our Etsy shop always in the

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place

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if you were interested. I bundle... I put

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everything that's pride related into a category on

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our Etsy shop that says pride planner or

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collection. It's not a good name. Wanna came

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up with on the fly, But if you

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see pride, you'll go, oh, that... That's where

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I wanna go look. So we did that

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thing to help keep

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dom subs organized during your fitness of training

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during your task during your service, like, however,

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how your power change it works. If you

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would like something that feels closer to your

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identity

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and you wanna save a little bit in

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the month of June. There you go. It's

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there. Yay.

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Yeah.

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I lost my breath on that because I

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didn't actually plan to talk about that 1

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today all, but then I got super super

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gifts.

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And a thing that I thought would take

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me a week.

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Took me 5 hours.

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And it's done and it's up. So if

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anybody's interested, feel free. They will live up

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on the R etsy shop forever, so you're

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not gonna miss them if, like now, It's

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not a good time or whatever. It's it's

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fine.

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So

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Yeah.

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Okay.

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I don't

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I don't think she did

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breathe today. No. Do you bunny asked in

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the live chat. And no. I didn't. Not.

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I'm not breathing at all right now. I

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feel like I need to catch my breath.

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Okay. Let's go into these Reddit post. That

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was a lot of announcements. It was.

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Yeah. Up It was It was. Here we

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go. The first thing we're gonna do is

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1 that was sent to us.

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Did I write down the name of the

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person sent it to us? Nope. But thank

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you to that person who did. I appreciate

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it.

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So let's go ahead and get started. First

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1.

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Feeling bad after dom, your quote, demanded that

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I shave. Now this is where Have to

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lean into the screen. Bear with me Mh.

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During the session, my 32 female dom, 47

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female

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demanded that I completely shaved my pubic hair

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for the next time we see each other.

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It pulled me right out of what we

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were doing and I told them know which

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they didn't accept right away because their head

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was still in our dynamic, and they didn't

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quite register my shift in tone over the

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phone.

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I keep things neatly trimmed and I don't

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even enjoy receiving ore.

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Afterwards, I did tell them how much I

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didn't like it, and we are planning on

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talking more about it. I did get a

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bit defensive and mean. They're usually so good

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about asking me my limits before introducing new

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things.

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I'm upset and hurt. We've been playing for

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almost a year now, but part of me

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just wants to end it over this even

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though everything was going great up until this

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incident. I'm feeling so inadequate right now. I

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typically have a very high sex drive, but

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I have no desire right now. I'm planning

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on telling them that we need to go

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back a few steps and take it down

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a notch while we rebuild trust.

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Yeah. Yeah

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okay. So I'm moved 2 minds on 1

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part of this, Not not the shaving. Like,

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that, is that person's limit and they get

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to go fuck no. I'm not shaving. Go

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bear. That's fine.

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The part I'm on 2, I'm of 2

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mines okay. And the first 1 was, are

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you fucking kidding me? And the second 1

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was, well, maybe.

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Was that

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they're dominant in that conversation, and it was

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a phone conversation, so they didn't have the

270
00:09:37,142 --> 00:09:38,261
necessarily have faced...

271
00:09:38,821 --> 00:09:40,613
Right. In body excuse mh

272
00:09:41,706 --> 00:09:42,604
did not

273
00:09:43,059 --> 00:09:47,279
register the tone fast enough. Like, unless you

274
00:09:47,279 --> 00:09:48,257
play with some

275
00:09:48,729 --> 00:09:51,605
push back and maybe Brat behavior or something

276
00:09:51,605 --> 00:09:54,082
where you you you recognize your submissive Micah

277
00:09:54,082 --> 00:09:55,920
go. I'm not doing that and it's playful,

278
00:09:56,253 --> 00:09:58,184
Mh. How can you be in a

279
00:09:58,559 --> 00:10:00,070
conversation as a dom,

280
00:10:00,865 --> 00:10:04,179
get told no. Yeah. That and that not

281
00:10:04,538 --> 00:10:07,748
immediately, like, clock something different. Right. I don't

282
00:10:07,966 --> 00:10:09,480
that's that's a little difficult,

283
00:10:10,118 --> 00:10:11,814
especially since they they were

284
00:10:13,961 --> 00:10:15,878
been together for at least a year. Right.

285
00:10:16,516 --> 00:10:19,252
You know, you would think by that point

286
00:10:19,550 --> 00:10:21,966
being with someone you would pick up some

287
00:10:22,025 --> 00:10:22,678
contextual clues.

288
00:10:23,715 --> 00:10:25,310
Right. You would know the 1 well enough

289
00:10:25,310 --> 00:10:28,022
maybe hopefully, and or how deep into top

290
00:10:28,022 --> 00:10:30,254
space are you over a phone conversation that

291
00:10:30,254 --> 00:10:31,451
you can't. Mh.

292
00:10:32,342 --> 00:10:34,036
Except. Top space from

293
00:10:34,412 --> 00:10:36,959
not everybody. Yeah. Yeah. But it typically means

294
00:10:36,959 --> 00:10:39,108
hyper focus. Like, you're more focused. So, like...

295
00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:41,823
Yeah. I'm not buying that. I'm think that

296
00:10:41,823 --> 00:10:43,435
a person slipped that in

297
00:10:43,808 --> 00:10:46,768
because as the... This person says they normally

298
00:10:46,903 --> 00:10:48,906
bring... You know, new things to me in

299
00:10:48,906 --> 00:10:51,371
a much better manner. Right. I think it

300
00:10:51,371 --> 00:10:52,485
was 1 of those I'm a slippage and

301
00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:53,599
see what I can get away with.

302
00:10:54,648 --> 00:10:56,396
Let me dumb them through this because I

303
00:10:56,396 --> 00:10:57,111
really want it.

304
00:10:57,826 --> 00:10:59,335
Or let me just see how far I

305
00:10:59,335 --> 00:11:00,924
can go. Let's just see what happens.

306
00:11:01,719 --> 00:11:02,457
I'm not

307
00:11:03,325 --> 00:11:05,725
not fan of that part. No. No. I

308
00:11:05,725 --> 00:11:07,085
also can't catch my breath. Hold on a

309
00:11:07,085 --> 00:11:07,325
second.

310
00:11:08,764 --> 00:11:08,845
Okay.

311
00:11:09,644 --> 00:11:13,360
You... What... So overall, Mh. The demanding that

312
00:11:13,419 --> 00:11:15,899
she shaves. And then now she feels inadequate.

313
00:11:16,059 --> 00:11:19,740
What what do you say about? IIII

314
00:11:19,740 --> 00:11:22,070
know it's not going to to mean a

315
00:11:22,070 --> 00:11:23,421
whole lot, but

316
00:11:23,977 --> 00:11:25,486
you know, they really have no reason to

317
00:11:25,486 --> 00:11:28,028
feel inadequate. I know. It's it's easy to

318
00:11:28,028 --> 00:11:29,538
tell somebody that they don't have to and

319
00:11:29,538 --> 00:11:31,778
harder for to internalize. Yeah. Yeah.

320
00:11:34,402 --> 00:11:36,707
I think it's good that for the time,

321
00:11:36,866 --> 00:11:37,875
they wanna step back

322
00:11:38,629 --> 00:11:40,060
Yeah. I think probably that might be a

323
00:11:40,060 --> 00:11:41,728
good idea. You know, take take a step

324
00:11:41,728 --> 00:11:43,261
back and and

325
00:11:44,112 --> 00:11:45,066
kinda start from scratch.

326
00:11:45,719 --> 00:11:47,077
And I mean, not all the way to

327
00:11:47,077 --> 00:11:48,036
the beginning, but, you know...

328
00:11:48,834 --> 00:11:51,231
No. If I tell you no to something,

329
00:11:51,471 --> 00:11:52,684
Mh. And I mean,

330
00:11:54,922 --> 00:11:56,120
see, that's why I'm moved 2 months because

331
00:11:56,120 --> 00:11:58,038
if they were in some sort of scene,

332
00:11:59,477 --> 00:12:00,676
I guess it just depends on how they

333
00:12:00,676 --> 00:12:01,495
play. But

334
00:12:02,049 --> 00:12:04,361
this was such an ask that it's really

335
00:12:04,361 --> 00:12:07,551
affected this person Mh. Mentally like, an emotionally.

336
00:12:07,710 --> 00:12:10,262
Like, they are impacted by this. So I

337
00:12:10,262 --> 00:12:11,001
feel like

338
00:12:11,633 --> 00:12:13,549
Does this mean that this was something that

339
00:12:13,549 --> 00:12:17,142
had previously been discussed, told no brought back

340
00:12:17,142 --> 00:12:17,381
up,

341
00:12:18,499 --> 00:12:19,936
Or was this something that's been hinted at

342
00:12:19,936 --> 00:12:22,029
and hinted at not actually directly asked for,

343
00:12:22,190 --> 00:12:24,269
but the person's, like, kind of like, shrugged

344
00:12:24,269 --> 00:12:25,409
it off, and now

345
00:12:25,789 --> 00:12:29,162
direct ask was not immediately told, okay. My

346
00:12:29,162 --> 00:12:31,790
bad shouldn't have even asked. Like, doesn't sound

347
00:12:31,790 --> 00:12:33,166
like anything's been done

348
00:12:33,542 --> 00:12:34,042
to

349
00:12:34,498 --> 00:12:37,126
even even in a small late, like, after

350
00:12:37,126 --> 00:12:39,049
the the scene part of the conversation go,

351
00:12:39,606 --> 00:12:40,878
m, I came on too you strong that.

352
00:12:41,116 --> 00:12:43,365
That's my bad. Like, nothing's went under repair

353
00:12:43,580 --> 00:12:44,852
even that small,

354
00:12:45,503 --> 00:12:48,070
breach of trust, Something that might be inc

355
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:52,100
if the person immediately acknowledged. Oh, hey. Yeah.

356
00:12:52,338 --> 00:12:54,028
I overs up there. I probably shouldn't have

357
00:12:54,028 --> 00:12:55,227
done that, or I shouldn't have done it

358
00:12:55,227 --> 00:12:56,666
that way or shouldn't have done it that,

359
00:12:56,746 --> 00:12:58,024
you know, at this time. I should have

360
00:12:58,024 --> 00:12:59,702
done this in a different way. Because this

361
00:12:59,702 --> 00:13:02,180
person Walked away going, oh, my god, do

362
00:13:02,180 --> 00:13:03,335
they not like

363
00:13:03,875 --> 00:13:04,995
my pubic area.

364
00:13:05,955 --> 00:13:07,575
I didn't even want them down there, but

365
00:13:08,274 --> 00:13:09,975
like do they... That... I mean, the

366
00:13:10,434 --> 00:13:12,707
has to come from somewhere. Some of that

367
00:13:12,764 --> 00:13:15,071
likely comes from some, you know, their own

368
00:13:15,071 --> 00:13:16,981
internal stuff that they've been through over the

369
00:13:16,981 --> 00:13:19,368
years. Mh. But for it to be this

370
00:13:19,368 --> 00:13:20,584
messed up and this

371
00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:23,446
to for them, to be how they reacted.

372
00:13:23,765 --> 00:13:25,918
Yeah. I just... I'm questioning what else is

373
00:13:25,918 --> 00:13:28,651
going on. Because I really think that,

374
00:13:29,347 --> 00:13:29,666
you know,

375
00:13:30,397 --> 00:13:31,829
if it had been just a verbal, like,

376
00:13:32,147 --> 00:13:32,704
Oops c.

377
00:13:33,420 --> 00:13:35,011
I don't think you walk away from that

378
00:13:35,011 --> 00:13:36,919
going, maybe we shouldn't even be in a

379
00:13:36,919 --> 00:13:38,924
relationship Like, I feel like there's more. And

380
00:13:38,924 --> 00:13:40,439
they're from There may be... Or it was

381
00:13:40,439 --> 00:13:42,034
1 of those things that... Yeah, It's small

382
00:13:42,034 --> 00:13:44,268
on its own. But it's built up on

383
00:13:44,268 --> 00:13:45,703
top of a lot of other. Which 1

384
00:13:45,703 --> 00:13:47,618
of those things that it it could have

385
00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:50,348
been the destroy they broke the chemicals. Exactly.

386
00:13:50,587 --> 00:13:53,385
Yeah. Exactly. Maybe there's other small things that

387
00:13:53,385 --> 00:13:54,923
have occurred enough times

388
00:13:55,303 --> 00:13:57,620
over the past year. Mh... On their own,

389
00:13:57,780 --> 00:13:59,307
you don't really about, you kinda go on,

390
00:13:59,465 --> 00:13:59,862
whatever,

391
00:14:00,338 --> 00:14:02,164
and this 1 was just a step too

392
00:14:02,164 --> 00:14:05,100
far and 1 too many. Yeah. That's possible.

393
00:14:06,628 --> 00:14:08,384
The thing is... I mean, I get... I

394
00:14:08,544 --> 00:14:10,220
I can hear a dom out there saying,

395
00:14:10,539 --> 00:14:12,216
But I get lost in the heads space

396
00:14:12,216 --> 00:14:15,423
too. Yeah. You're human. You do, but use

397
00:14:15,423 --> 00:14:17,359
the dog have the fucking responsibility.

398
00:14:17,737 --> 00:14:20,050
Like, this this has a responsibility to advocate

399
00:14:20,050 --> 00:14:21,885
for themselves, and they did. They said,

400
00:14:22,615 --> 00:14:23,725
I don't want this I'm not doing it.

401
00:14:23,884 --> 00:14:26,974
Right? Mh. If you realize that you asked

402
00:14:26,974 --> 00:14:28,346
for something that

403
00:14:29,431 --> 00:14:32,467
clear early they've... You're submissive vehemently pushes back

404
00:14:32,467 --> 00:14:35,646
on, that's on you to, like, rectify that

405
00:14:35,646 --> 00:14:37,339
situation. And and

406
00:14:37,807 --> 00:14:39,237
dom who have the responsibility.

407
00:14:39,634 --> 00:14:41,699
If you know the normal way to do

408
00:14:41,699 --> 00:14:44,161
this is to talk about it before. Right.

409
00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:45,432
Outside of a scene,

410
00:14:46,403 --> 00:14:48,318
it really is on you if you air

411
00:14:48,318 --> 00:14:49,775
quote, slip up

412
00:14:50,712 --> 00:14:52,148
and bring it up in scene. Like, yeah.

413
00:14:52,467 --> 00:14:54,633
People are human tech. See Jb in the

414
00:14:54,633 --> 00:14:57,972
heat of the moment, not thinking too completely

415
00:14:57,972 --> 00:15:00,915
clearly and throwing out a suggestion. At this

416
00:15:00,915 --> 00:15:02,903
point after 10 years, I could absolutely see

417
00:15:02,903 --> 00:15:03,062
it.

418
00:15:03,794 --> 00:15:05,554
But he's not gonna let me walk away.

419
00:15:05,794 --> 00:15:06,595
If I say no,

420
00:15:07,315 --> 00:15:08,595
if I say for it if I do

421
00:15:08,595 --> 00:15:10,847
whatever to make it clear, the thing Happening.

422
00:15:11,085 --> 00:15:12,854
He's said let me walk away from that

423
00:15:12,989 --> 00:15:15,607
interaction without knowing that, hey, wait, we're good.

424
00:15:15,845 --> 00:15:18,642
Yeah. So like, yes. Happening Yes, dumb. I

425
00:15:18,642 --> 00:15:20,238
know some of you fucking hate it, but

426
00:15:20,238 --> 00:15:21,434
the onus is on you.

427
00:15:22,551 --> 00:15:23,987
You brought up a thing at the wrong

428
00:15:23,987 --> 00:15:24,706
fucking time.

429
00:15:25,359 --> 00:15:27,197
Now your partner has walked away feeling and

430
00:15:27,197 --> 00:15:27,516
adequate.

431
00:15:28,075 --> 00:15:29,433
What the fuck you doing to make sure

432
00:15:29,433 --> 00:15:30,072
that doesn't happen?

433
00:15:31,111 --> 00:15:32,721
It is on the submissive. To speak up.

434
00:15:32,959 --> 00:15:35,027
Mh. Never gonna not say that. And even

435
00:15:35,027 --> 00:15:36,856
now they need to speak up. They need

436
00:15:36,856 --> 00:15:37,492
to say something.

437
00:15:38,049 --> 00:15:38,685
But I just...

438
00:15:39,560 --> 00:15:40,696
It's 1... It's

439
00:15:42,516 --> 00:15:44,264
A person can decide that's a big enough

440
00:15:44,264 --> 00:15:44,502
thing,

441
00:15:45,694 --> 00:15:47,124
but the way they're describing it.

442
00:15:47,918 --> 00:15:50,063
I feel like it's a medium sized thing

443
00:15:50,063 --> 00:15:52,235
that was just 1 thing to. Building too.

444
00:15:52,475 --> 00:15:55,194
Yeah. Mh. Mh. And then may well be.

445
00:15:57,995 --> 00:15:59,850
That may well be. I mean, I know

446
00:15:59,850 --> 00:16:01,690
there are people out there who, you know,

447
00:16:03,850 --> 00:16:07,210
it it's their personal choice. Sure. Always. Yeah.

448
00:16:09,057 --> 00:16:11,442
Yeah, I don't And, of course, I mean,

449
00:16:11,601 --> 00:16:13,691
this kind of touches on the whole

450
00:16:14,780 --> 00:16:15,280
stereotype

451
00:16:16,131 --> 00:16:16,449
that...

452
00:16:17,419 --> 00:16:19,332
You know, sickness are supposed to be, like,

453
00:16:20,129 --> 00:16:22,860
clean shave or hair or whatever in whatever

454
00:16:22,998 --> 00:16:24,911
region of the body. Mh. The dom wants

455
00:16:24,911 --> 00:16:26,361
to, like, spend time. Yeah.

456
00:16:27,397 --> 00:16:27,897
And

457
00:16:28,593 --> 00:16:31,384
just because something is common or seems common,

458
00:16:31,623 --> 00:16:32,261
I should say.

459
00:16:32,898 --> 00:16:33,877
Doesn't mean

460
00:16:34,189 --> 00:16:35,407
anything. You should not

461
00:16:35,863 --> 00:16:37,617
expect that that's your partner wants to do

462
00:16:37,617 --> 00:16:39,928
that. It's a it's a legitimate ask. It's

463
00:16:39,928 --> 00:16:41,682
not a demand. You can have demand,

464
00:16:42,494 --> 00:16:45,365
Like... Yeah. I... It it it goes... Yeah.

465
00:16:45,604 --> 00:16:47,438
Yeah. It it's a stereotype type just like

466
00:16:47,438 --> 00:16:48,873
the whole thing, you know, you hear you

467
00:16:48,873 --> 00:16:50,468
hear people talk about... Oh,

468
00:16:51,425 --> 00:16:54,088
is... Everybody in Bd, Poly is

469
00:16:54,623 --> 00:16:57,407
Yeah. Just because somebody has had enough experience

470
00:16:57,407 --> 00:16:59,569
with it feeling like more... People than not

471
00:16:59,807 --> 00:17:01,875
Right. Yeah. It it seems like it may

472
00:17:01,875 --> 00:17:03,067
be be

473
00:17:04,419 --> 00:17:06,407
prevalent, but, you know, Yeah. And in some

474
00:17:06,407 --> 00:17:07,997
communities, it will be and in some places,

475
00:17:08,076 --> 00:17:10,405
yes. It might be really common that a

476
00:17:10,405 --> 00:17:12,480
lot of submissive are hair free.

477
00:17:14,395 --> 00:17:17,362
But it's it's literally like everything out we

478
00:17:17,362 --> 00:17:20,304
do. You have to, like, negotiate it and

479
00:17:20,304 --> 00:17:21,655
somebody concerns or they don't.

480
00:17:22,529 --> 00:17:24,517
And I just... I really wish I knew

481
00:17:24,517 --> 00:17:26,390
more. If because I just feel like,

482
00:17:27,009 --> 00:17:28,769
you know, this is more...

483
00:17:30,529 --> 00:17:31,650
This is... I don't know how to say

484
00:17:31,650 --> 00:17:33,329
it. It's not more than it is. It's

485
00:17:33,329 --> 00:17:34,220
just something... There's...

486
00:17:35,409 --> 00:17:36,757
It was a straw that broke of camel

487
00:17:36,757 --> 00:17:38,659
back. Yeah. And so I'm like, And you

488
00:17:38,659 --> 00:17:40,166
may be right on that. That that may

489
00:17:40,166 --> 00:17:41,410
be exactly what it

490
00:17:42,490 --> 00:17:43,609
In here... And the thing I would tell

491
00:17:43,609 --> 00:17:45,930
us is, if you walk away from encounters

492
00:17:45,930 --> 00:17:48,650
with your dominant partner feeling inadequate.

493
00:17:50,505 --> 00:17:51,244
I think

494
00:17:51,545 --> 00:17:54,105
my assuming you're... That's not a safety issue.

495
00:17:54,345 --> 00:17:56,640
My first instinct is always to tell you

496
00:17:56,838 --> 00:17:59,062
to at least let your dominant partner know.

497
00:18:00,333 --> 00:18:01,683
Unless this is a song of dance you've

498
00:18:01,683 --> 00:18:03,907
played about 12 times already. Mh. And this

499
00:18:03,907 --> 00:18:05,416
is just a pattern your end. But if

500
00:18:05,416 --> 00:18:07,345
this is like the first or second time,

501
00:18:07,585 --> 00:18:09,585
You've had this count... Some... This kind of

502
00:18:09,585 --> 00:18:12,644
encounter where things didn't quite go the way

503
00:18:12,785 --> 00:18:15,440
they usually do and it... You're you've walk

504
00:18:15,440 --> 00:18:16,339
away feeling

505
00:18:17,679 --> 00:18:19,920
less than your, you know, submissive of self

506
00:18:19,920 --> 00:18:21,734
or wondering if there's something wrong with you

507
00:18:22,494 --> 00:18:23,932
especially if you ever walk away wondering if

508
00:18:23,932 --> 00:18:25,530
there's something wrong with you. Mh.

509
00:18:26,089 --> 00:18:28,487
Have the conversation with your dominant partner. Most

510
00:18:28,487 --> 00:18:29,126
of the time,

511
00:18:30,419 --> 00:18:32,579
you're gonna get a sense pretty quickly if

512
00:18:32,579 --> 00:18:34,339
that was an oops scene or if that

513
00:18:34,339 --> 00:18:36,259
was A0I tried to get away with something

514
00:18:36,419 --> 00:18:36,740
I couldn't.

515
00:18:38,194 --> 00:18:39,471
And you might not know immediately because you

516
00:18:39,471 --> 00:18:41,307
have to watch patterns of behavior? Like, what

517
00:18:41,307 --> 00:18:42,823
do they actually do? Do they talk good

518
00:18:42,823 --> 00:18:44,658
game and then don't change anything? Or do

519
00:18:44,658 --> 00:18:46,910
they actually change their behavior? But if it's

520
00:18:46,910 --> 00:18:48,509
a relationship you think you want to keep.

521
00:18:48,669 --> 00:18:51,309
It's worth it to you. Have the conversation,

522
00:18:51,470 --> 00:18:53,230
let them know, then see what the hell

523
00:18:53,230 --> 00:18:54,604
they do and how they were. On.

524
00:18:55,322 --> 00:18:56,998
But if... We're on, you know,

525
00:18:57,717 --> 00:18:59,792
more than 2 or 3 times of going,

526
00:18:59,872 --> 00:19:02,960
hey, this... This interaction left me feeling like

527
00:19:03,079 --> 00:19:03,396
shit.

528
00:19:05,939 --> 00:19:08,322
That's probably not the person. For you. No.

529
00:19:09,752 --> 00:19:09,911
No.

530
00:19:10,963 --> 00:19:12,961
Yeah. But, yeah, it's he can't just tell

531
00:19:12,961 --> 00:19:14,799
somebody to not feel inadequate. I I wish

532
00:19:14,799 --> 00:19:15,539
it was that

533
00:19:15,918 --> 00:19:18,235
Know. I didn't walk around sprinkling that, like,

534
00:19:18,475 --> 00:19:18,849
ferry

535
00:19:19,286 --> 00:19:20,000
for people.

536
00:19:20,635 --> 00:19:22,405
But, you know, it's it's more

537
00:19:23,254 --> 00:19:25,238
either and it's an and or, I think

538
00:19:25,238 --> 00:19:26,587
it's... You can do both or you can

539
00:19:26,587 --> 00:19:28,591
do 1 of the 2. It's having a

540
00:19:28,591 --> 00:19:30,048
partner that genuinely

541
00:19:30,426 --> 00:19:32,500
makes you feel good about yourself. Mh.

542
00:19:33,138 --> 00:19:34,036
And or

543
00:19:34,813 --> 00:19:37,205
figuring out ways to to find that within

544
00:19:37,205 --> 00:19:40,416
your self. It's therapy. It's time away from

545
00:19:40,416 --> 00:19:42,973
a shitty partner. Yeah. You know. Yeah. Doing

546
00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:44,491
things that lift you up and build you

547
00:19:44,491 --> 00:19:46,342
up personally, but you can find that with

548
00:19:46,342 --> 00:19:47,933
the right partner. And if you are if

549
00:19:47,933 --> 00:19:50,081
we were in a relationship where you feel

550
00:19:50,081 --> 00:19:52,070
inadequate more often than not, either side of

551
00:19:52,070 --> 00:19:54,238
the slash, what we doing? Need to reassess.

552
00:19:54,398 --> 00:19:57,035
Yeah. Right. Yeah. I mean, you know, right,

553
00:19:57,434 --> 00:19:59,613
I I have to say kudos to

554
00:20:00,151 --> 00:20:01,211
to them for

555
00:20:02,002 --> 00:20:04,465
you know, standing their bounds and, you know,

556
00:20:04,941 --> 00:20:07,324
Right. Saying, you know, right away. No. I'm

557
00:20:07,324 --> 00:20:09,468
not gonna do it. Mh. Mh. Yep.

558
00:20:10,359 --> 00:20:12,035
Still give side eye to a dumb the

559
00:20:12,035 --> 00:20:12,194
camp.

560
00:20:13,391 --> 00:20:16,185
Can I see circumstances where it might be

561
00:20:16,185 --> 00:20:18,989
harder to pull back, like, really intense scenes

562
00:20:18,989 --> 00:20:21,210
physical scenes? You're in the room with 1

563
00:20:21,210 --> 00:20:23,431
another. Like, I can see it. And I'm

564
00:20:23,431 --> 00:20:26,366
not gonna say, it can't possibly happen over

565
00:20:26,366 --> 00:20:28,762
the phone, but I'm still gonna give some

566
00:20:28,762 --> 00:20:31,461
side I know still give inside either. No.

567
00:20:32,096 --> 00:20:33,445
Okay. So I don't know if that was

568
00:20:33,445 --> 00:20:35,855
a rant. Phone but here we are. Okay.

569
00:20:36,095 --> 00:20:37,474
And here we go. Next

570
00:20:37,775 --> 00:20:41,055
1KI

571
00:20:41,055 --> 00:20:43,394
feel like we're gonna ask how many

572
00:20:44,346 --> 00:20:46,573
rain drops are in a thunderstorm with this

573
00:20:46,573 --> 00:20:48,641
1, but I just I just felt do

574
00:20:48,641 --> 00:20:50,629
it. I I saw the title in like

575
00:20:50,629 --> 00:20:50,947
room.

576
00:20:52,394 --> 00:20:55,263
Title, what are the ways to vet to

577
00:20:55,263 --> 00:20:56,060
prevent ghost?

578
00:20:56,698 --> 00:20:59,567
I just got ghost twice in 3 months.

579
00:20:59,886 --> 00:21:02,295
Both times after the first scene. And let

580
00:21:02,295 --> 00:21:03,970
me tell you, it's happened other times too,

581
00:21:04,130 --> 00:21:04,928
just not recently.

582
00:21:05,486 --> 00:21:07,561
I don't have anybody image issues and both

583
00:21:07,561 --> 00:21:09,170
times we had times coffee The guy seemed

584
00:21:09,170 --> 00:21:11,000
to really into me. They even said that

585
00:21:11,079 --> 00:21:13,467
I'm hot during the scene. So what's the

586
00:21:13,467 --> 00:21:15,297
deal with Dom ghost after the first scene.

587
00:21:15,535 --> 00:21:17,127
What am I doing wrong that they can't

588
00:21:17,127 --> 00:21:18,650
tell me in my face or even over

589
00:21:18,650 --> 00:21:19,442
a freaking text.

590
00:21:20,235 --> 00:21:21,583
Is there a better way to vet them

591
00:21:21,583 --> 00:21:24,358
to avoid this? The last 1, I even

592
00:21:24,358 --> 00:21:27,240
joking asked during coffee if he'd ghost me

593
00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:28,836
because I'd been ghost recently.

594
00:21:29,315 --> 00:21:31,230
He said, of course, not.

595
00:21:32,188 --> 00:21:34,916
So frustrating it's getting hiring. Oh, I can...

596
00:21:35,155 --> 00:21:37,707
I can only imagine. Yeah. I mean, I'm

597
00:21:37,787 --> 00:21:39,622
I'm that time person if something bad happens

598
00:21:39,622 --> 00:21:42,174
once. I'm ready you're done. I'm already probably

599
00:21:42,174 --> 00:21:44,423
done, But twice, I would just go into

600
00:21:44,423 --> 00:21:46,660
a kinky nun and be the my damn

601
00:21:46,660 --> 00:21:48,737
himself. I just gonna be like, oh, clearly,

602
00:21:48,897 --> 00:21:50,495
this isn't for me. Mh. I don't want

603
00:21:50,495 --> 00:21:51,783
people to feel that, but I do know

604
00:21:51,783 --> 00:21:53,532
how I would react. Yeah. Oh,

605
00:21:54,644 --> 00:21:55,042
you know,

606
00:21:56,155 --> 00:21:56,893
I wish

607
00:21:57,904 --> 00:22:00,184
there there was a way to vet

608
00:22:01,019 --> 00:22:02,133
to prevent ghost.

609
00:22:03,007 --> 00:22:06,028
You know. There's no guarantee. There there there

610
00:22:06,028 --> 00:22:07,165
there is no guarantee.

611
00:22:08,429 --> 00:22:09,468
You know, I I...

612
00:22:10,427 --> 00:22:10,927
Whoever

613
00:22:11,626 --> 00:22:14,443
figures out a a ghost proof way

614
00:22:15,142 --> 00:22:16,795
to do it. They'll they'll make millions

615
00:22:17,153 --> 00:22:18,903
They absolutely won't. You know, They absolutely won't

616
00:22:18,982 --> 00:22:20,573
Yeah. Now I will say, and this...

617
00:22:22,243 --> 00:22:24,328
I don't know how helpful this advice because

618
00:22:24,328 --> 00:22:26,083
some people are just looking for play partners.

619
00:22:26,402 --> 00:22:27,917
Right. And so they're moving a little bit

620
00:22:27,917 --> 00:22:29,672
faster than a person who's looking for a

621
00:22:29,672 --> 00:22:31,825
long term power exchange relationship. Mh. If you

622
00:22:31,825 --> 00:22:34,072
are looking for a long term power, change

623
00:22:34,072 --> 00:22:35,904
strip, and you keep, like, picking up the

624
00:22:35,904 --> 00:22:37,178
ones that tend to fucking ghost.

625
00:22:38,214 --> 00:22:41,559
Yeah. It's time to drag the part out

626
00:22:41,559 --> 00:22:43,482
before the first scene. A lot longer. Now

627
00:22:43,482 --> 00:22:45,546
that's no fucking guarantee of anything. Something some

628
00:22:45,546 --> 00:22:47,213
of these fucker will play the long game.

629
00:22:47,610 --> 00:22:49,039
And they'll be like, oh, I've got someone

630
00:22:49,039 --> 00:22:50,548
on the side. I'm doing whatever. I don't

631
00:22:50,548 --> 00:22:51,262
have to commit anything.

632
00:22:51,834 --> 00:22:53,432
Gotta sail all the right words eventually I'll

633
00:22:53,432 --> 00:22:55,590
get what I'm looking for. I mean, I

634
00:22:55,590 --> 00:22:57,348
wish... I wish I could be a fly

635
00:22:57,348 --> 00:22:59,186
on the wall of some of these, like,

636
00:22:59,346 --> 00:23:01,758
the conversations that they would have had with

637
00:23:01,758 --> 00:23:04,076
these dom because it's like, were they giving

638
00:23:04,076 --> 00:23:06,713
off fake dom vibes that just because I

639
00:23:06,713 --> 00:23:08,072
see it all the time I would... I

640
00:23:08,072 --> 00:23:08,732
might recognize

641
00:23:09,431 --> 00:23:09,931
or

642
00:23:10,723 --> 00:23:12,873
were they... Did they actually come across as

643
00:23:12,873 --> 00:23:15,341
genuine and then did that thing that happens

644
00:23:15,341 --> 00:23:17,650
in all forms of dating in all flavors

645
00:23:17,650 --> 00:23:18,446
of relationship?

646
00:23:19,179 --> 00:23:21,579
And just, you know, instead of just taking

647
00:23:21,579 --> 00:23:24,460
responsibility and going, yeah. This isn't gonna work

648
00:23:24,460 --> 00:23:26,140
for me. Instead of... See here's the thing.

649
00:23:27,259 --> 00:23:29,511
I don't like ghost any level. Short of

650
00:23:29,511 --> 00:23:31,267
it being a safety issue. Mh.

651
00:23:31,826 --> 00:23:34,459
I think that as hard as it is,

652
00:23:34,698 --> 00:23:36,469
it's much easier to send a single long

653
00:23:36,469 --> 00:23:37,426
as you don't think you're dealing with a

654
00:23:37,426 --> 00:23:39,500
crazy person, send a single text that goes,

655
00:23:40,058 --> 00:23:41,095
so glad to have met you, this isn't

656
00:23:41,095 --> 00:23:42,610
a worker for me Gotta go. Yeah. And

657
00:23:42,610 --> 00:23:44,285
then if they can take a hint block

658
00:23:44,285 --> 00:23:45,663
delete to what you gotta do. But

659
00:23:46,771 --> 00:23:49,237
If you wanna call yourself a fucking dumb,

660
00:23:49,476 --> 00:23:52,180
and you can't just tell somebody, hey, I

661
00:23:52,180 --> 00:23:53,867
don't wanna play with you in more. Hey.

662
00:23:54,026 --> 00:23:56,655
Listen isn't working for me. Hang up your

663
00:23:56,655 --> 00:23:59,443
fucking little pretend dom hat and just call

664
00:23:59,443 --> 00:24:00,638
it a fucking day and go tell people

665
00:24:00,638 --> 00:24:02,311
you like kinky sex and move the fuck

666
00:24:02,311 --> 00:24:02,470
on.

667
00:24:03,360 --> 00:24:05,745
Because good god almighty. If you were gonna

668
00:24:05,745 --> 00:24:08,289
dumb, you better fucking learn how to have

669
00:24:08,289 --> 00:24:08,789
difficult

670
00:24:09,243 --> 00:24:11,311
conversations and to tell people shit, they might

671
00:24:11,311 --> 00:24:11,947
not wanna hear.

672
00:24:12,677 --> 00:24:13,154
Mh.

673
00:24:13,552 --> 00:24:16,676
And say Ra brought up something interesting. When

674
00:24:16,733 --> 00:24:18,244
was sex part of the scene.

675
00:24:19,198 --> 00:24:21,504
Yeah. You know, if it was, then there...

676
00:24:21,663 --> 00:24:23,191
You know, They got they said they got

677
00:24:23,191 --> 00:24:24,626
what they wanted and they're gone. I know.

678
00:24:24,785 --> 00:24:27,257
And there's just no way to to the

679
00:24:27,257 --> 00:24:29,568
to guarantee that he won't be ghost. Now

680
00:24:29,728 --> 00:24:30,286
I... You know,

681
00:24:30,940 --> 00:24:32,319
while this is no guarantee.

682
00:24:33,980 --> 00:24:36,799
Alright. And and this, I think would

683
00:24:37,914 --> 00:24:40,306
take a little intros intersection on this person's

684
00:24:40,306 --> 00:24:40,865
part? Yeah.

685
00:24:42,699 --> 00:24:45,968
Look down k... Okay. All these people how

686
00:24:45,968 --> 00:24:46,846
all these people.

687
00:24:47,659 --> 00:24:48,698
What do they have in common?

688
00:24:49,577 --> 00:24:50,935
Besides the fact that they ghost to me,

689
00:24:51,575 --> 00:24:52,634
what do they have

690
00:24:53,013 --> 00:24:55,810
in common? What is there any other common

691
00:24:55,810 --> 00:24:59,256
denominators? Mh. So at that point then, what

692
00:24:59,256 --> 00:25:02,207
do I need to change where I'm meeting

693
00:25:02,207 --> 00:25:04,759
these people, how I'm finding them. The rates

694
00:25:04,919 --> 00:25:07,640
I'm seeing, especially that that common traits. Mh.

695
00:25:08,116 --> 00:25:09,784
Talk a certain way. Act a certain way.

696
00:25:10,498 --> 00:25:12,483
You know, but I... Yeah. You found them

697
00:25:12,483 --> 00:25:14,468
a certain place if it... Right. If it's

698
00:25:14,468 --> 00:25:16,791
coming from, like, the same place over and

699
00:25:16,791 --> 00:25:18,626
over again. Yeah. Yeah. Time to time to

700
00:25:18,626 --> 00:25:20,302
stop that week. Mh. It's been a few

701
00:25:20,302 --> 00:25:21,897
years since we had this conversation with this...

702
00:25:22,057 --> 00:25:22,557
It

703
00:25:23,189 --> 00:25:24,462
thought about it with this. Yeah.

704
00:25:25,179 --> 00:25:27,885
I am not going to blame a person

705
00:25:27,885 --> 00:25:30,432
who finds themselves in a shitty situation with

706
00:25:30,432 --> 00:25:30,964
a partner

707
00:25:31,403 --> 00:25:33,559
in the sense that they, like, nobody deserves

708
00:25:33,559 --> 00:25:36,033
that. Right? Nobody deserves a a string of

709
00:25:36,033 --> 00:25:38,906
failed relationships when you were trying. Nobody deserves

710
00:25:38,906 --> 00:25:39,226
to, like,

711
00:25:40,356 --> 00:25:42,341
have the same kind of treatment from partner

712
00:25:42,341 --> 00:25:45,064
to partner partner. Nobody deserves that. However,

713
00:25:45,914 --> 00:25:48,073
if you keep picking the same kind a

714
00:25:48,073 --> 00:25:50,135
fucking people over and over again. Yeah. It

715
00:25:50,135 --> 00:25:52,356
is time to fundamentally change I and sometimes

716
00:25:52,356 --> 00:25:53,784
that change needs to be maybe I should

717
00:25:53,784 --> 00:25:55,950
be by myself for a minute. Because it.

718
00:25:56,109 --> 00:25:58,269
Your picker is off. It's the old axiom.

719
00:25:59,389 --> 00:26:01,230
If you do the same thing, or run

720
00:26:01,230 --> 00:26:03,884
over and expect different results. Right. I mean,

721
00:26:03,965 --> 00:26:06,205
there are therapeutic things I've heard about where...

722
00:26:06,845 --> 00:26:08,125
And I'm am you hall, I'm not a

723
00:26:08,125 --> 00:26:10,924
mental health professional. I'm not qualified somebody who

724
00:26:10,924 --> 00:26:13,571
actually knows, should should you know, speak up

725
00:26:13,571 --> 00:26:14,150
if you...

726
00:26:14,602 --> 00:26:15,237
Especially if I'm wrong.

727
00:26:16,189 --> 00:26:17,855
But the things that I've I've sort of

728
00:26:17,855 --> 00:26:19,282
heard recently from, like,

729
00:26:20,174 --> 00:26:23,369
therapist online is that when we seem to

730
00:26:23,369 --> 00:26:25,846
gravitate towards a specific type of person who

731
00:26:25,846 --> 00:26:28,518
is not good for that usually comes from

732
00:26:28,657 --> 00:26:30,576
often childhood trauma, but it's trauma in some

733
00:26:30,576 --> 00:26:33,213
way. It's something about this as stressful as

734
00:26:33,213 --> 00:26:35,131
this person is or this type of person

735
00:26:35,131 --> 00:26:36,270
is feels

736
00:26:37,384 --> 00:26:40,181
familiar enough. Mh. That we keep going back

737
00:26:40,181 --> 00:26:42,578
to it. And those kinds of cycles... It's

738
00:26:42,578 --> 00:26:44,097
it's probably time for therapy to try to

739
00:26:44,097 --> 00:26:45,136
break some of those cycles.

740
00:26:45,695 --> 00:26:47,307
But, I mean, that's just that's just the

741
00:26:47,307 --> 00:26:49,461
thing. You don't deserve shitty treatment?

742
00:26:50,179 --> 00:26:52,891
No. But if they're all doing the same

743
00:26:52,891 --> 00:26:53,210
thing.

744
00:26:53,703 --> 00:26:56,004
Mh. At a certain point, there's only 1

745
00:26:56,004 --> 00:26:56,980
common denominator?

746
00:26:57,987 --> 00:27:00,288
Yeah. But in this case, it's 2, okay.

747
00:27:00,447 --> 00:27:01,716
Are you finding them in the same place?

748
00:27:02,288 --> 00:27:03,723
Are you going to the same spot? Right.

749
00:27:04,839 --> 00:27:06,593
Do you think you have a type? You

750
00:27:06,593 --> 00:27:06,752
know?

751
00:27:07,470 --> 00:27:09,383
Maybe maybe ignore that type for me. Quite

752
00:27:09,383 --> 00:27:10,474
frankly, I found

753
00:27:10,914 --> 00:27:11,414
actual

754
00:27:11,953 --> 00:27:13,311
partnership and love and whatever when I went.

755
00:27:14,590 --> 00:27:16,668
The type has not helped me thus far

756
00:27:16,668 --> 00:27:17,567
and and went.

757
00:27:18,905 --> 00:27:20,989
We both went against what we thought we

758
00:27:20,989 --> 00:27:22,894
would be okay within a relationship. You were

759
00:27:22,894 --> 00:27:25,037
not looking for another single mother? No. And

760
00:27:25,037 --> 00:27:25,751
then I showed up.

761
00:27:26,624 --> 00:27:29,131
I thought I needed my partners to be

762
00:27:29,189 --> 00:27:31,742
taller than me. And somehow I liked them

763
00:27:31,742 --> 00:27:32,700
really skinny.

764
00:27:33,657 --> 00:27:34,455
I don't know why.

765
00:27:38,066 --> 00:27:39,743
And then I went for a short, and

766
00:27:39,743 --> 00:27:41,182
it worked out for me.

767
00:27:43,674 --> 00:27:45,674
So, yeah. I I wish there was like,

768
00:27:45,755 --> 00:27:46,494
a magic

769
00:27:47,115 --> 00:27:48,715
thing to do to tell everybody hey if

770
00:27:48,715 --> 00:27:50,154
you do this, you'll never be ghost.

771
00:27:50,807 --> 00:27:53,357
Ghost is about the person who ghost you.

772
00:27:54,233 --> 00:27:57,579
That's truly, maybe y'all weren't compatible, but the

773
00:27:57,579 --> 00:27:59,332
fact that they weren't willing to just tell

774
00:27:59,332 --> 00:28:01,417
you and just leave you hanging. That is...

775
00:28:01,656 --> 00:28:03,168
That says more about them than it does

776
00:28:03,168 --> 00:28:05,158
out. Yeah. Short of you being an unsafe

777
00:28:05,158 --> 00:28:07,148
person. There's always a caveat yell. Mh.

778
00:28:08,039 --> 00:28:10,188
Because that for me, if you feel unsafe

779
00:28:10,188 --> 00:28:11,859
if you're not sure that you're going to

780
00:28:11,859 --> 00:28:12,996
get a

781
00:28:13,371 --> 00:28:13,871
adult

782
00:28:14,247 --> 00:28:16,172
reaction from somebody, and this is... The only

783
00:28:16,172 --> 00:28:17,525
way you'll be able to sleep at night?

784
00:28:17,923 --> 00:28:18,719
Okay. Fine.

785
00:28:19,435 --> 00:28:21,187
But if it's... I just don't wanna say

786
00:28:21,187 --> 00:28:21,903
the hard thing.

787
00:28:23,828 --> 00:28:26,212
No. No. I'm not. I'm I'm not fan

788
00:28:26,212 --> 00:28:27,563
ghost thing. At all.

789
00:28:29,311 --> 00:28:29,470
Okay.

790
00:28:31,473 --> 00:28:33,228
Okay. Let's go to the next 1.

791
00:28:34,584 --> 00:28:34,664
Okay.

792
00:28:35,860 --> 00:28:38,412
I am perpetually out of breath this episode.

793
00:28:41,618 --> 00:28:43,532
Okay. I gotta get close. I gotta lean

794
00:28:43,532 --> 00:28:45,685
in. Got the old eyes. Here we go.

795
00:28:46,643 --> 00:28:49,195
Title, getting your sub to open up during

796
00:28:49,195 --> 00:28:50,870
check ins during singing.

797
00:28:51,841 --> 00:28:53,672
I'm just learning and exploring my style of

798
00:28:53,672 --> 00:28:55,822
dominance with my husband. When doing a scene,

799
00:28:55,981 --> 00:28:57,733
I find my husband does not want to

800
00:28:57,733 --> 00:28:59,246
communicate with me when things are not going

801
00:28:59,246 --> 00:29:01,728
right Like he sees it is his job

802
00:29:01,728 --> 00:29:04,036
to, quote, power through and suffer for me.

803
00:29:04,354 --> 00:29:05,707
Even when I check in with him, he

804
00:29:05,707 --> 00:29:06,901
replies, I'm fine, mistress.

805
00:29:07,378 --> 00:29:09,463
Today I gave him an example of of

806
00:29:09,463 --> 00:29:11,217
if I have him tied up, and I'm

807
00:29:11,217 --> 00:29:11,775
spanking him,

808
00:29:12,811 --> 00:29:14,246
you know, I wanted to power through the

809
00:29:14,246 --> 00:29:15,920
spanking unless he needs to use a safe

810
00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:17,569
word. But if he had a cramp, he

811
00:29:17,689 --> 00:29:19,920
needs to communicate that to me. The cramp

812
00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:21,752
is not the kind of suffering I want

813
00:29:21,752 --> 00:29:23,664
for him. Mh. I don't wanna find out

814
00:29:23,664 --> 00:29:25,258
after the scene that he suffered the whole

815
00:29:25,258 --> 00:29:26,851
time in a way I didn't even know

816
00:29:26,851 --> 00:29:27,010
about.

817
00:29:27,980 --> 00:29:30,229
Skilled dom can many times read their sickness

818
00:29:30,286 --> 00:29:32,194
body and expression and can tell something is

819
00:29:32,194 --> 00:29:34,340
wrong even when they don't say it. I

820
00:29:34,340 --> 00:29:35,931
don't feel like I'm a skilled at that

821
00:29:35,931 --> 00:29:36,885
yet as I want to.

822
00:29:37,778 --> 00:29:39,377
Do you have any tips for getting your

823
00:29:39,377 --> 00:29:40,975
submissive to open up about how they are

824
00:29:40,975 --> 00:29:42,972
doing during a scene? My husband seems to

825
00:29:42,972 --> 00:29:44,810
think that he's a better submissive if he's

826
00:29:44,810 --> 00:29:47,134
quiet about it? But then he tells me

827
00:29:47,134 --> 00:29:47,451
later,

828
00:29:48,007 --> 00:29:49,436
I hate that.

829
00:29:50,310 --> 00:29:52,851
Edit. Reading initial responses I need to clarify

830
00:29:52,851 --> 00:29:55,328
my thoughts. I think he will communicate, me

831
00:29:55,328 --> 00:29:57,636
when things are unsafe or his boundaries are

832
00:29:57,636 --> 00:29:59,865
being pushed, but what he doesn't communicate to

833
00:29:59,865 --> 00:30:02,173
me is when he's uncomfortable in a non

834
00:30:02,173 --> 00:30:04,561
kin way, and it's d distracting from being

835
00:30:04,561 --> 00:30:07,369
in us to submissive state when small adjustments

836
00:30:07,369 --> 00:30:07,848
can be made.

837
00:30:14,075 --> 00:30:15,765
It's a Wow. Mh.

838
00:30:17,599 --> 00:30:20,093
So I can't remember in our dynamic.

839
00:30:21,428 --> 00:30:24,194
If I was quick to communicate and see

840
00:30:24,315 --> 00:30:26,315
in the beginning or not. Do you remember?

841
00:30:26,794 --> 00:30:28,634
I mean, clearly, our very I safe for

842
00:30:28,634 --> 00:30:30,634
it. You next. You went seem fucking hard.

843
00:30:30,875 --> 00:30:32,889
Yeah. I did. I came in. Yeah.

844
00:30:33,929 --> 00:30:37,450
You. Yeah. Ex super. Yeah. Yep. But, I

845
00:30:37,450 --> 00:30:37,529
mean,

846
00:30:38,490 --> 00:30:39,849
do do you remember...

847
00:30:40,345 --> 00:30:42,265
Ever having a sense that I wasn't telling

848
00:30:42,265 --> 00:30:44,825
small things. Like, like this person says here,

849
00:30:45,384 --> 00:30:47,305
their sub will, you know,

850
00:30:47,959 --> 00:30:50,267
say, hey, boundary being pushed. I'm I'm feeling

851
00:30:50,267 --> 00:30:52,018
unsafe here safe word, But, like, the small

852
00:30:52,018 --> 00:30:54,087
things. No. I don't think you ever did.

853
00:30:54,405 --> 00:30:56,555
Okay. Okay. You know, but then that comes

854
00:30:56,555 --> 00:30:58,082
with the fact that you know,

855
00:30:59,674 --> 00:31:01,903
have talked about how, you know,

856
00:31:02,779 --> 00:31:04,314
need to know what's going on

857
00:31:05,008 --> 00:31:05,508
because,

858
00:31:06,140 --> 00:31:08,779
want to supply good pain as opposed to

859
00:31:08,779 --> 00:31:09,980
bad pain. Mh.

860
00:31:11,580 --> 00:31:14,299
And and, you know, I I need I

861
00:31:14,299 --> 00:31:15,420
need to know those things.

862
00:31:16,390 --> 00:31:18,299
Right. And it's a... And the way I've

863
00:31:18,299 --> 00:31:20,208
always kinda thought of it when I started

864
00:31:20,208 --> 00:31:22,849
actually, like, thinking about it, is a a

865
00:31:22,849 --> 00:31:25,805
safety precaution for both of us. Mh. Because

866
00:31:25,805 --> 00:31:26,305
if

867
00:31:26,764 --> 00:31:27,264
you

868
00:31:27,643 --> 00:31:28,143
accidentally

869
00:31:28,841 --> 00:31:31,170
cause me harm. If it's school mental emotional.

870
00:31:31,807 --> 00:31:34,035
Because I didn't fucking tell you something. Right.

871
00:31:34,274 --> 00:31:36,502
I've damaged you just as much as you've

872
00:31:36,502 --> 00:31:39,146
damaged me. Sure. It's Like, how do you

873
00:31:39,146 --> 00:31:41,220
feel comfortable going in and playing with a

874
00:31:41,220 --> 00:31:43,532
partner. After that, If you can't quite trust,

875
00:31:43,612 --> 00:31:45,526
they're gonna tell you shit you need to

876
00:31:45,526 --> 00:31:45,765
know?

877
00:31:46,563 --> 00:31:46,802
Yeah.

878
00:31:47,774 --> 00:31:48,013
I mean,

879
00:31:48,971 --> 00:31:50,408
the fact that they're like, well, you know,

880
00:31:50,568 --> 00:31:50,967
if they...

881
00:31:51,686 --> 00:31:54,080
If it's if boundary is pushed or, you

882
00:31:54,080 --> 00:31:55,997
know, safe word, they're they're going to do

883
00:31:55,997 --> 00:31:56,316
that.

884
00:31:57,130 --> 00:31:58,650
It doesn't they have proof that they will.

885
00:31:58,809 --> 00:32:01,049
They just... They leave Believe that they would.

886
00:32:01,930 --> 00:32:02,430
And

887
00:32:05,864 --> 00:32:07,000
You know, I've always

888
00:32:08,566 --> 00:32:09,940
said someone who,

889
00:32:10,552 --> 00:32:12,062
you know, says, oh, I don't need a

890
00:32:12,062 --> 00:32:14,367
safe word. I don't need, you know, mh.

891
00:32:15,098 --> 00:32:17,168
Not a fan. Not a fan. That that...

892
00:32:17,407 --> 00:32:19,397
That's... Because anything that happened at any point.

893
00:32:19,716 --> 00:32:21,069
Right. Anything could happen.

894
00:32:23,553 --> 00:32:25,069
So a couple things come to mind.

895
00:32:25,866 --> 00:32:28,121
1, I wonder how

896
00:32:28,658 --> 00:32:31,051
this dominant is checking in. Are they checking

897
00:32:31,051 --> 00:32:32,566
in and going? How are you doing? Mh.

898
00:32:32,806 --> 00:32:33,538
Are you k?

899
00:32:34,333 --> 00:32:35,527
Or are they...

900
00:32:36,243 --> 00:32:37,595
And our way is not the only way,

901
00:32:37,675 --> 00:32:39,584
but I just know our way. You do

902
00:32:39,584 --> 00:32:40,434
a a

903
00:32:40,951 --> 00:32:43,018
traffic light thing. Give me a color. Right.

904
00:32:43,257 --> 00:32:45,244
Now we talked about before the scene what

905
00:32:45,244 --> 00:32:48,185
the colors mean. Right? Mh. And the reality

906
00:32:48,185 --> 00:32:49,321
is is if I

907
00:32:50,348 --> 00:32:52,103
if I don't say anything because I'm, like,

908
00:32:52,262 --> 00:32:54,017
struggling or I'm in subs space, whole fucking

909
00:32:54,017 --> 00:32:56,511
scene ins immediately. Right. But the color

910
00:32:57,048 --> 00:32:57,548
allows

911
00:32:57,925 --> 00:32:59,701
Jb to know how to

912
00:33:00,015 --> 00:33:02,335
to moderate. How to navigate moderate. Yeah. As

913
00:33:02,494 --> 00:33:04,654
I got more comfortable over the years, I

914
00:33:04,654 --> 00:33:07,055
got I got sassy with my colors, like,

915
00:33:07,214 --> 00:33:08,355
we're... We are

916
00:33:08,654 --> 00:33:11,138
the rainbow here. Okay? Because it's not just

917
00:33:11,138 --> 00:33:12,804
green yellow red. It's green if I'm like,

918
00:33:13,042 --> 00:33:15,423
I'm I'm good. Let's keep going.

919
00:33:16,058 --> 00:33:17,645
It'll be red if it's like the worst

920
00:33:17,645 --> 00:33:17,962
thing ever.

921
00:33:19,090 --> 00:33:20,682
But if I need something to slow down

922
00:33:20,682 --> 00:33:22,671
or something Quite, you know, as a little

923
00:33:22,671 --> 00:33:25,456
off. I'll I'll give you a green yellow

924
00:33:25,456 --> 00:33:28,820
or an orange red or a pale orange.

925
00:33:28,980 --> 00:33:30,580
Like, I I mean, I'll do that, but

926
00:33:30,580 --> 00:33:33,059
that took years to get to. Yeah. You

927
00:33:33,059 --> 00:33:34,820
know, I feel like this is a conversation

928
00:33:34,820 --> 00:33:37,059
for them out of scene when everybody's got

929
00:33:37,059 --> 00:33:38,753
the close on this calm and it's not

930
00:33:38,753 --> 00:33:41,411
a king mindset said. Out out of scene

931
00:33:41,470 --> 00:33:42,529
and out of

932
00:33:43,468 --> 00:33:45,465
protocol. Right. And, like, look.

933
00:33:46,519 --> 00:33:47,796
Here... You know, is the way I'm checking

934
00:33:47,796 --> 00:33:48,913
a network and we we have to have

935
00:33:48,913 --> 00:33:50,828
a way. I think the other thing that

936
00:33:50,828 --> 00:33:52,504
needs to be in imparted to the submissive,

937
00:33:52,823 --> 00:33:55,154
is it is a trust thing. Right. There

938
00:33:55,154 --> 00:33:57,234
is no way that dominant can trusts their

939
00:33:57,234 --> 00:33:59,875
partner. Yeah. If they... If they're they're not

940
00:33:59,875 --> 00:34:02,774
telling if they're not giving them them added

941
00:34:03,009 --> 00:34:04,915
right. Yeah. I wondered they say that, you

942
00:34:04,915 --> 00:34:07,218
know, they're new to dom, So is the

943
00:34:07,218 --> 00:34:09,283
of new to submission? Mh. And do they

944
00:34:09,283 --> 00:34:11,164
need a little bit like, whether it's sight

945
00:34:11,522 --> 00:34:13,430
lunches or workshops or books or how I

946
00:34:13,430 --> 00:34:15,735
really fucking learn about shit. Do they need

947
00:34:15,735 --> 00:34:18,359
some more of that to understand? I also...

948
00:34:18,597 --> 00:34:20,187
And I don't like to reduce things down

949
00:34:20,187 --> 00:34:21,789
to gender. I really don't.

950
00:34:24,167 --> 00:34:25,277
Did did that... Yeah.

951
00:34:26,784 --> 00:34:29,344
It's a guy. Mh. The were they raised

952
00:34:29,344 --> 00:34:31,264
and socialize as a guy or not. I

953
00:34:31,264 --> 00:34:33,505
don't know. Can't know. But I do wonder

954
00:34:33,505 --> 00:34:35,364
if there's a little bit of the the

955
00:34:35,425 --> 00:34:37,919
gender... Oh, I'm supposed to be tough. I'm,

956
00:34:38,078 --> 00:34:40,393
yeah. I'm not allowed to tell you to

957
00:34:40,393 --> 00:34:42,547
do this that I'm struggling or something is

958
00:34:42,547 --> 00:34:43,346
not going well.

959
00:34:44,543 --> 00:34:46,634
That... I don't. I'm... An expert in how

960
00:34:46,634 --> 00:34:48,791
you deep program yourself or anybody else out

961
00:34:48,791 --> 00:34:50,390
of that. Is that's a time thing, and

962
00:34:50,390 --> 00:34:52,148
that's a... They have to be willing to

963
00:34:52,148 --> 00:34:54,705
see things differently than they've done before. If

964
00:34:54,705 --> 00:34:56,318
if that... The case? I mean,

965
00:34:58,556 --> 00:35:00,175
you know, can people learn

966
00:35:00,713 --> 00:35:01,513
more absolutely.

967
00:35:02,232 --> 00:35:03,511
Some people just don't want to?

968
00:35:04,883 --> 00:35:06,632
They don't think they should. They don't know.

969
00:35:06,791 --> 00:35:09,574
They can. Mh. Whatever their own past is

970
00:35:09,574 --> 00:35:11,244
done to them. I mean, all kinds of

971
00:35:11,244 --> 00:35:13,565
shit. But I do wonder. Is this part

972
00:35:13,565 --> 00:35:15,393
of. I say it's all of it, I

973
00:35:15,393 --> 00:35:17,858
think that's too dismissive. But if there's this...

974
00:35:18,016 --> 00:35:20,560
If that person has any background and believing

975
00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:21,992
that they're supposed to tough shit out,

976
00:35:22,961 --> 00:35:25,587
and endure and or is all their king

977
00:35:25,587 --> 00:35:26,702
information coming from fucking porn?

978
00:35:28,054 --> 00:35:30,703
Mh. Because there is a lot of submissive

979
00:35:30,760 --> 00:35:31,556
of all genders.

980
00:35:32,128 --> 00:35:33,582
Suffering and enduring

981
00:35:34,115 --> 00:35:34,934
for their

982
00:35:35,467 --> 00:35:37,455
dom, which can be hot and if you

983
00:35:37,455 --> 00:35:39,601
wanna know, like, negotiate, have a good time.

984
00:35:39,840 --> 00:35:42,080
Mh. But that doesn't mean that that's Miss

985
00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:44,065
won't tell you that their hand just went

986
00:35:44,065 --> 00:35:46,287
numb or you've got a cramp and hell

987
00:35:46,287 --> 00:35:48,827
right. Right. Right. Lauren doesn't show when they

988
00:35:48,827 --> 00:35:51,469
cut the scene, since to rub out the

989
00:35:51,469 --> 00:35:52,510
cramp. You know what I mean?

990
00:35:54,429 --> 00:35:55,949
And in the... You know, some of the

991
00:35:55,949 --> 00:35:56,109
more...

992
00:35:57,070 --> 00:35:59,003
I don't like to say extreme forms of

993
00:35:59,003 --> 00:36:01,401
porn because that's subjective. But there are, you

994
00:36:01,401 --> 00:36:03,559
know, especially in king porn. There are some

995
00:36:03,559 --> 00:36:05,397
things you'll see and you'll come across where

996
00:36:05,397 --> 00:36:07,530
it looks like those persons, the limits don't

997
00:36:07,649 --> 00:36:09,562
exist and they will endure anything, and it's

998
00:36:09,562 --> 00:36:11,873
like, yes. But that's fantasy. And that's pretend.

999
00:36:12,033 --> 00:36:13,866
We're not actually supposed to do it in

1000
00:36:13,866 --> 00:36:15,794
our bedroom at home. I mean, we all

1001
00:36:15,794 --> 00:36:17,411
get to have limits.

1002
00:36:17,869 --> 00:36:19,705
And it's okay if for let cramp. Good

1003
00:36:19,705 --> 00:36:21,302
lord. How many times have we been fucking

1004
00:36:21,302 --> 00:36:23,137
around. Both of us got guy. Either 1

1005
00:36:23,137 --> 00:36:24,829
1 over in the other. Yeah. Oh, my

1006
00:36:24,829 --> 00:36:25,230
god.

1007
00:36:25,869 --> 00:36:28,349
I. So... Yeah. And I I commend this

1008
00:36:28,349 --> 00:36:29,789
dom for going. Okay. I know I don't

1009
00:36:29,789 --> 00:36:31,469
have the skills for this. I know... I'm

1010
00:36:31,630 --> 00:36:34,030
I'm still new but also, I wanna take

1011
00:36:34,030 --> 00:36:35,617
the dominant by the hand and go, hey.

1012
00:36:36,649 --> 00:36:39,109
Even if you dom for years and years

1013
00:36:39,109 --> 00:36:40,797
and you get like, really know your partner,

1014
00:36:41,276 --> 00:36:42,713
and you can read their expressions.

1015
00:36:43,432 --> 00:36:45,507
You will still, like, not see something. You

1016
00:36:45,507 --> 00:36:45,588
will...

1017
00:36:46,386 --> 00:36:48,062
You're human, you will still make a mistake.

1018
00:36:48,222 --> 00:36:49,340
They need a safe word. They need a

1019
00:36:49,340 --> 00:36:51,444
way communicate. They need to be able to

1020
00:36:51,580 --> 00:36:53,804
communicate with the No no matter No how

1021
00:36:53,804 --> 00:36:55,632
well you know somebody and, you know, like,

1022
00:36:55,791 --> 00:36:57,317
III

1023
00:36:57,317 --> 00:36:59,867
feel I know you fairly well Mh. After

1024
00:36:59,867 --> 00:37:01,539
all these years, but, you know,

1025
00:37:02,655 --> 00:37:04,886
and it's not happened at any point. Sure.

1026
00:37:05,603 --> 00:37:06,103
So

1027
00:37:06,813 --> 00:37:08,722
It's not... I don't ever say that to

1028
00:37:08,722 --> 00:37:10,097
take away from somebody's

1029
00:37:10,552 --> 00:37:13,518
desire for or willingness to our ability to

1030
00:37:13,813 --> 00:37:16,378
really read their partner a skill that you

1031
00:37:16,378 --> 00:37:18,536
you can develop over time with a person,

1032
00:37:18,855 --> 00:37:21,113
and that's a great skill to have, but

1033
00:37:21,252 --> 00:37:22,711
do not get

1034
00:37:23,824 --> 00:37:26,478
so confident that you don't need backup

1035
00:37:27,014 --> 00:37:29,646
risk mitigation. That there shouldn't be something in

1036
00:37:29,646 --> 00:37:31,321
place that will snap you out of your

1037
00:37:31,321 --> 00:37:32,996
moment to go, Oh shit. Something's gone wrong.

1038
00:37:34,047 --> 00:37:34,366
You know,

1039
00:37:35,400 --> 00:37:37,731
I I don't I don't know any

1040
00:37:39,061 --> 00:37:42,099
anything scientific about this and it anything I

1041
00:37:42,099 --> 00:37:43,315
might know is really

1042
00:37:44,722 --> 00:37:46,947
me just looking at things and when I

1043
00:37:46,947 --> 00:37:47,901
think this is what this means. I don't

1044
00:37:47,901 --> 00:37:49,490
even know if I've ever heard anybody really

1045
00:37:49,490 --> 00:37:50,959
talk about it. Except for,

1046
00:37:51,895 --> 00:37:54,608
but I wonder how many people, dom or

1047
00:37:54,608 --> 00:37:54,927
subs.

1048
00:37:55,565 --> 00:37:57,001
Tops or we're bought. Mh.

1049
00:37:57,733 --> 00:37:58,233
Who

1050
00:37:58,847 --> 00:38:00,302
internalized in some way

1051
00:38:00,915 --> 00:38:02,427
that a Safe word is a fail a

1052
00:38:02,427 --> 00:38:04,750
failing. Because there's just too many fucking who

1053
00:38:04,750 --> 00:38:05,949
are like, I don't play with Safe words.

1054
00:38:06,030 --> 00:38:08,190
It's fuck you. I know. If I just

1055
00:38:08,190 --> 00:38:09,630
submissive play with a safe word. Guess what

1056
00:38:09,630 --> 00:38:10,829
maybe you play with a Safe for it

1057
00:38:10,829 --> 00:38:13,390
today. Because that's what I do. Yeah. But

1058
00:38:13,390 --> 00:38:15,960
it's like We don't wanna admit that that

1059
00:38:15,960 --> 00:38:18,434
the most random fucking thing can happen. You

1060
00:38:18,434 --> 00:38:21,627
don't actually have total control over all fucking

1061
00:38:21,627 --> 00:38:21,946
things.

1062
00:38:24,504 --> 00:38:27,041
So if there is... And not, obviously not

1063
00:38:27,041 --> 00:38:28,389
everybody feels that way. Like, I get that.

1064
00:38:28,628 --> 00:38:30,213
But if there is some, like...

1065
00:38:31,025 --> 00:38:32,945
Thought of that floating out in the ether

1066
00:38:32,945 --> 00:38:35,184
somewhere. It's gonna affect all sides of the

1067
00:38:35,184 --> 00:38:35,425
slash.

1068
00:38:35,985 --> 00:38:38,545
It's going to... Some people are gonna internalize

1069
00:38:38,545 --> 00:38:40,144
it and maybe not even realize it.

1070
00:38:40,798 --> 00:38:41,298
But

1071
00:38:41,677 --> 00:38:43,932
he... This submissive things he is supposed to

1072
00:38:44,070 --> 00:38:47,204
endure. Yeah. But maybe we don't endure in.

1073
00:38:47,742 --> 00:38:49,667
Like why we doing it? It it's supposed

1074
00:38:49,667 --> 00:38:50,326
to be

1075
00:38:50,859 --> 00:38:54,356
fun. It's supposed to be something that that

1076
00:38:54,356 --> 00:38:54,856
fulfill

1077
00:38:55,548 --> 00:38:56,978
for both sides of the slash.

1078
00:38:58,424 --> 00:38:58,663
Okay?

1079
00:38:59,537 --> 00:39:00,037
And,

1080
00:39:02,001 --> 00:39:02,954
you know, the...

1081
00:39:04,623 --> 00:39:06,312
Did our our video froze again.

1082
00:39:09,822 --> 00:39:11,578
Yes. It is supposed to be fun, and

1083
00:39:11,578 --> 00:39:13,909
it is... It's... Yeah. I and it can

1084
00:39:13,909 --> 00:39:16,469
be super intense. It can be, like,

1085
00:39:17,670 --> 00:39:19,989
make you wonder if, you know, you need

1086
00:39:19,989 --> 00:39:22,742
therapy later intent hint as long as

1087
00:39:23,120 --> 00:39:25,834
everest within bounds, you've played as safely as

1088
00:39:25,834 --> 00:39:28,070
you possibly can nothing's hundred works percent safe.

1089
00:39:28,469 --> 00:39:30,145
You've got after care, like,

1090
00:39:31,277 --> 00:39:32,097
if you can

1091
00:39:33,431 --> 00:39:36,324
have all that then go fucking crazy, but

1092
00:39:36,382 --> 00:39:38,137
everybody involved has to be able to trust

1093
00:39:38,137 --> 00:39:39,434
each other. And,

1094
00:39:39,891 --> 00:39:41,500
you know, We spent a lot of time

1095
00:39:41,500 --> 00:39:43,489
telling submissive was about, you know, a dom

1096
00:39:43,489 --> 00:39:45,716
needs to earn your trust, but Jesus christ

1097
00:39:45,716 --> 00:39:47,307
the sub needs to earn their dom trust.

1098
00:39:47,546 --> 00:39:50,186
Mh. And if that dom cannot depend on

1099
00:39:50,186 --> 00:39:52,412
you to speak that fuck up, you are

1100
00:39:52,412 --> 00:39:53,843
no longer a safe person to play with.

1101
00:39:54,082 --> 00:39:56,150
Yeah. And then you can't get intense in

1102
00:39:56,150 --> 00:39:57,342
the way that you might want to.

1103
00:39:58,233 --> 00:39:59,051
Because if

1104
00:39:59,586 --> 00:40:01,737
the the more trust there is and the

1105
00:40:01,737 --> 00:40:02,715
more willingness

1106
00:40:03,090 --> 00:40:04,148
everybody is to,

1107
00:40:04,524 --> 00:40:06,436
you know, mitigate as much risk as is

1108
00:40:06,436 --> 00:40:07,250
even possible.

1109
00:40:07,969 --> 00:40:09,969
The further if you choose to, you can

1110
00:40:09,969 --> 00:40:11,090
go. But without that,

1111
00:40:13,170 --> 00:40:15,170
first and also this caveat, if you don't

1112
00:40:15,170 --> 00:40:16,623
wanna go that far. You don't fucking have

1113
00:40:16,623 --> 00:40:18,541
to. I like to play in the middle

1114
00:40:18,541 --> 00:40:20,698
of my boundaries with a lot of room

1115
00:40:20,698 --> 00:40:22,296
between me and the men's line as.

1116
00:40:22,856 --> 00:40:23,095
I mean,

1117
00:40:24,068 --> 00:40:25,920
That's how I like to play. But,

1118
00:40:26,771 --> 00:40:30,110
yeah. I just this endurance bullshit. Yeah. You

1119
00:40:30,110 --> 00:40:32,575
know and believing that their partner would use

1120
00:40:32,575 --> 00:40:34,262
their Safe word, but not actually knowing,

1121
00:40:35,060 --> 00:40:37,134
You know, I I feel like they must

1122
00:40:37,134 --> 00:40:37,634
be

1123
00:40:38,808 --> 00:40:40,425
playing in a way that

1124
00:40:40,802 --> 00:40:42,717
that the dominant is trying to say well

1125
00:40:42,717 --> 00:40:44,800
within the boundary. Lines, especially as they're learning.

1126
00:40:44,879 --> 00:40:46,467
And I really respect that. I think that's

1127
00:40:46,467 --> 00:40:49,008
a good way to start, you know, until

1128
00:40:49,008 --> 00:40:51,788
you you're confident they're confident you've built up

1129
00:40:51,788 --> 00:40:52,875
some whatever, but

1130
00:40:53,791 --> 00:40:55,226
I don't know how that don't trust their

1131
00:40:55,226 --> 00:40:57,777
sub. Yeah. Yeah. That yeah. And that might

1132
00:40:57,777 --> 00:40:59,690
be the conversations. Like, until you get your

1133
00:40:59,690 --> 00:41:02,808
mind wrapped around this. We can't play. Why

1134
00:41:02,808 --> 00:41:05,590
can't... It's have the trust. Yeah. No. And

1135
00:41:05,590 --> 00:41:06,328
and it's

1136
00:41:06,702 --> 00:41:07,202
more

1137
00:41:07,735 --> 00:41:08,212
risky.

1138
00:41:08,783 --> 00:41:10,771
Than it already is. If you're not willing

1139
00:41:10,771 --> 00:41:11,589
to do then

1140
00:41:11,963 --> 00:41:12,463
And

1141
00:41:13,156 --> 00:41:15,621
I don't I don't like for everything to

1142
00:41:15,621 --> 00:41:17,944
fall back on a power, exchange. Right But

1143
00:41:17,944 --> 00:41:19,538
maybe it needs to be, I'm speaking as

1144
00:41:19,538 --> 00:41:21,211
your mistress here. This is a rule. Yeah.

1145
00:41:21,450 --> 00:41:22,746
If you break this rule

1146
00:41:23,282 --> 00:41:24,955
you wearing kinky play time.

1147
00:41:27,757 --> 00:41:28,313
1 second.

1148
00:41:28,950 --> 00:41:32,211
Okay. Okay. Next 1. Yeah. Hang on. Okay.

1149
00:41:32,371 --> 00:41:33,723
Oh, no. That was 1. I just read

1150
00:41:33,723 --> 00:41:36,050
next 1. Go head to what you gotta

1151
00:41:36,050 --> 00:41:36,210
do.

1152
00:41:37,409 --> 00:41:38,230
This 1

1153
00:41:38,609 --> 00:41:39,650
hit close to home.

1154
00:41:40,929 --> 00:41:43,250
And... Because I I saw myself in it,

1155
00:41:43,409 --> 00:41:45,023
and I didn't quite like. It, but it

1156
00:41:45,023 --> 00:41:46,560
did mean I had a very

1157
00:41:47,177 --> 00:41:47,677
specific,

1158
00:41:49,093 --> 00:41:50,530
response, mental response.

1159
00:41:51,487 --> 00:41:52,226
Are you

1160
00:41:53,259 --> 00:41:55,416
podcast you can't see. He... Jimmy just walked

1161
00:41:55,416 --> 00:41:56,555
away. He's doing something

1162
00:41:57,014 --> 00:41:57,333
across them.

1163
00:41:58,851 --> 00:42:01,019
Are you able to pay attention, or do

1164
00:42:01,019 --> 00:42:01,815
you want me to wait till you come

1165
00:42:01,815 --> 00:42:03,405
back? Give me 1 second. Okay.

1166
00:42:04,121 --> 00:42:05,870
Almost... I'm trying not to belt into the

1167
00:42:05,870 --> 00:42:08,494
microphone because I am a professional podcast house.

1168
00:42:08,972 --> 00:42:09,528
Thank you very much.

1169
00:42:11,057 --> 00:42:13,609
Look, drinking diet coke, and I'm talking too

1170
00:42:13,609 --> 00:42:15,044
fast, and I'm swallowing air.

1171
00:42:16,161 --> 00:42:17,916
The belt is coming. I'm just trying to

1172
00:42:17,916 --> 00:42:19,771
hold it off until we're denied

1173
00:42:20,164 --> 00:42:20,664
streaming

1174
00:42:21,045 --> 00:42:22,085
and recording.

1175
00:42:22,885 --> 00:42:24,324
Okay. Are you ready for me? I am

1176
00:42:24,324 --> 00:42:24,565
ready.

1177
00:42:25,204 --> 00:42:25,525
Title.

1178
00:42:26,164 --> 00:42:28,585
Acts of surface or just un.

1179
00:42:29,699 --> 00:42:30,418
Okay. Here we go.

1180
00:42:31,936 --> 00:42:33,934
So my dominant I have reached a talking

1181
00:42:33,934 --> 00:42:36,331
point that I'm not sure he understands what

1182
00:42:36,492 --> 00:42:38,090
I mean. Maybe I don't know how to

1183
00:42:38,090 --> 00:42:38,900
explain correctly.

1184
00:42:39,534 --> 00:42:41,197
In terms of what kind of sub I

1185
00:42:41,197 --> 00:42:43,257
am, I'm not entirely sure, but I know

1186
00:42:43,257 --> 00:42:45,476
that I love acts of service. I want

1187
00:42:45,476 --> 00:42:47,323
you anything that will make his life easier

1188
00:42:47,323 --> 00:42:49,474
and his day better. And while he does

1189
00:42:49,474 --> 00:42:51,706
fully appreciate it, I've tried to explain my

1190
00:42:51,706 --> 00:42:53,473
reasoning behind it, and I'm not shoot of

1191
00:42:53,473 --> 00:42:55,382
the message is really getting through to him.

1192
00:42:56,018 --> 00:42:59,120
I find myself very un unsatisfied to do

1193
00:42:59,120 --> 00:43:01,347
things if I'm just doing them for myself.

1194
00:43:01,745 --> 00:43:03,507
Sure I'll wash the dishes, take out the

1195
00:43:03,507 --> 00:43:05,890
trash, clean the bathtub, etcetera. But doing it

1196
00:43:05,890 --> 00:43:07,559
for myself gives me no desire to do

1197
00:43:07,559 --> 00:43:09,306
it. And since I don't see the reward

1198
00:43:09,306 --> 00:43:11,664
in doing a common chore, I did procrastinate

1199
00:43:11,704 --> 00:43:13,853
an 8 on them. On the flip side,

1200
00:43:14,410 --> 00:43:16,240
if I know that he'll be coming over,

1201
00:43:16,479 --> 00:43:17,911
and the dishes aren't clean or the floor

1202
00:43:17,911 --> 00:43:20,555
is vacuum, I am much more motivated in

1203
00:43:20,555 --> 00:43:22,548
doing these chores. If I do them for

1204
00:43:22,548 --> 00:43:24,403
myself, I don't have that sense of satisfaction

1205
00:43:24,541 --> 00:43:26,056
at the end of doing them, but when

1206
00:43:26,135 --> 00:43:28,461
I, quote, do them for him, I may

1207
00:43:28,461 --> 00:43:30,050
not enjoy the chore, but I have a

1208
00:43:30,050 --> 00:43:31,559
sense of pride for getting it done.

1209
00:43:32,512 --> 00:43:34,577
I've tried explaining this to him, and I

1210
00:43:34,577 --> 00:43:36,643
think he understands until I realize that maybe

1211
00:43:36,643 --> 00:43:37,119
he doesn't.

1212
00:43:38,009 --> 00:43:40,647
This does extend to other non chore related

1213
00:43:40,647 --> 00:43:42,005
areas of my life, but I don't know

1214
00:43:42,005 --> 00:43:43,524
how to explain to him that these things,

1215
00:43:44,243 --> 00:43:46,001
these are things that I want to give

1216
00:43:46,001 --> 00:43:48,730
myself and not necessarily for him. But before

1217
00:43:48,730 --> 00:43:50,484
he came into the picture, I would rather

1218
00:43:50,484 --> 00:43:52,317
have had all my teeth pulled before doing

1219
00:43:52,317 --> 00:43:52,955
any chores.

1220
00:43:53,672 --> 00:43:55,187
I think he may think of it as

1221
00:43:55,187 --> 00:43:57,847
me not having any self motivation or discipline

1222
00:43:58,140 --> 00:44:00,386
and needing to rely on him to basically

1223
00:44:00,442 --> 00:44:01,869
tell me what to do because I can't

1224
00:44:01,869 --> 00:44:02,584
do it myself.

1225
00:44:03,313 --> 00:44:05,693
Can understand if that's the thought process, but

1226
00:44:05,693 --> 00:44:08,391
he knows I'm very independent and occasionally stubborn

1227
00:44:08,391 --> 00:44:10,612
person who will still get things done that

1228
00:44:10,612 --> 00:44:12,455
need to be done. But made do a

1229
00:44:12,455 --> 00:44:13,730
half ass job because at the end of

1230
00:44:13,730 --> 00:44:15,163
the day, if I'm doing anything for myself,

1231
00:44:15,402 --> 00:44:16,596
I don't feel the need to put in

1232
00:44:16,596 --> 00:44:18,507
the extra effort to go above and beyond

1233
00:44:18,507 --> 00:44:20,592
when it's just another chore that have to...

1234
00:44:20,830 --> 00:44:22,339
That have to be done again, and again,

1235
00:44:22,498 --> 00:44:23,610
and again, anyways,

1236
00:44:24,404 --> 00:44:26,469
He feels I'm doing everything for him and

1237
00:44:26,469 --> 00:44:29,090
not for myself, which is again understandable but

1238
00:44:29,090 --> 00:44:29,726
not quite the case.

1239
00:44:30,455 --> 00:44:32,201
How would I go about explaining to him

1240
00:44:32,201 --> 00:44:34,605
that I would and could do these things

1241
00:44:34,661 --> 00:44:36,565
anyways, but having them be part of our

1242
00:44:36,565 --> 00:44:38,961
dynamic would make me more motivated and cited

1243
00:44:38,961 --> 00:44:41,183
for the most mundane and boring tasks.

1244
00:44:42,611 --> 00:44:43,722
I am in this,

1245
00:44:45,151 --> 00:44:47,706
post and III

1246
00:44:47,706 --> 00:44:49,854
mean, I could have fucking written that almost

1247
00:44:49,854 --> 00:44:50,490
word for word.

1248
00:44:52,479 --> 00:44:54,802
So I I definitely have my point, but

1249
00:44:54,802 --> 00:44:55,757
what are your thoughts?

1250
00:44:56,554 --> 00:44:59,023
Being the dominant who would be on the

1251
00:44:59,023 --> 00:45:01,354
flip side of this type of thing? Yeah

1252
00:45:01,650 --> 00:45:02,765
because you definitely are.

1253
00:45:07,780 --> 00:45:09,923
You know, there's there there's a few things

1254
00:45:09,923 --> 00:45:12,477
at play here. And and, yes, I do

1255
00:45:12,477 --> 00:45:12,873
see

1256
00:45:14,222 --> 00:45:16,600
little bit of someone IIIII

1257
00:45:16,600 --> 00:45:17,869
know Mh in there.

1258
00:45:27,015 --> 00:45:28,617
So let me put it you this to

1259
00:45:28,617 --> 00:45:29,514
because they

1260
00:45:30,125 --> 00:45:32,266
in... Like, literally came to you for a

1261
00:45:32,266 --> 00:45:34,750
thing and basically use this language of

1262
00:45:35,454 --> 00:45:36,486
I know I'm supposed to do it, but

1263
00:45:36,565 --> 00:45:37,676
I can't be motivated to do it on

1264
00:45:37,676 --> 00:45:38,945
my own so I need your help. Now

1265
00:45:38,945 --> 00:45:40,532
the way you ended up flipping at what

1266
00:45:40,532 --> 00:45:42,294
we're doing is you put your in it

1267
00:45:42,294 --> 00:45:43,892
because you... Like, you're, like, I need to

1268
00:45:43,892 --> 00:45:45,970
do this too. Right. But this was not

1269
00:45:45,970 --> 00:45:47,168
the first time I've come to you for

1270
00:45:47,168 --> 00:45:48,846
that. So when I come to you and

1271
00:45:48,846 --> 00:45:51,492
go look. Mh. I'm not motivated to do

1272
00:45:51,492 --> 00:45:53,559
this on my own. I need your help.

1273
00:45:54,354 --> 00:45:55,706
How do you feel that? How do you

1274
00:45:55,706 --> 00:45:56,819
handle it? How do you wrap your mind

1275
00:45:56,819 --> 00:45:58,887
around? You know, when when you do that,

1276
00:45:59,205 --> 00:46:00,890
III

1277
00:46:00,890 --> 00:46:02,402
feel kinda good that you're willing to come

1278
00:46:02,402 --> 00:46:04,549
to me and asked me, you know, those

1279
00:46:04,549 --> 00:46:04,788
things.

1280
00:46:08,625 --> 00:46:09,661
You know, I'm I'm gonna...

1281
00:46:10,539 --> 00:46:13,170
Because I am I am my fault on

1282
00:46:13,170 --> 00:46:15,244
the big D side of the slash, I'm

1283
00:46:15,403 --> 00:46:16,462
I'm kinda gonna

1284
00:46:16,933 --> 00:46:18,524
Are you Yeah. I just can't catch my

1285
00:46:18,524 --> 00:46:19,319
breath the word.

1286
00:46:20,114 --> 00:46:20,273
Okay.

1287
00:46:23,614 --> 00:46:24,807
Now wasn't been trained to pot.

1288
00:46:26,257 --> 00:46:26,416
Okay.

1289
00:46:28,011 --> 00:46:29,787
While I am I am not

1290
00:46:30,165 --> 00:46:31,680
a little SII

1291
00:46:31,680 --> 00:46:33,515
think what it comes down to is it's

1292
00:46:33,515 --> 00:46:34,493
not a matter

1293
00:46:35,523 --> 00:46:37,514
of the motivation like they are saying.

1294
00:46:39,665 --> 00:46:41,735
I think there's probably a number of things

1295
00:46:41,735 --> 00:46:43,510
that go on there. There's the accountability.

1296
00:46:43,965 --> 00:46:45,659
That that's what this person wants, and they

1297
00:46:45,659 --> 00:46:46,699
just don't know how to say that what

1298
00:46:46,699 --> 00:46:47,679
they want is a accountability.

1299
00:46:48,300 --> 00:46:49,760
They they want the accountability.

1300
00:46:50,699 --> 00:46:51,199
And

1301
00:46:52,788 --> 00:46:54,617
you know, I I would have to say,

1302
00:46:55,094 --> 00:46:57,399
you know, because III know with you and

1303
00:46:57,399 --> 00:46:59,679
and and with others, you know, when

1304
00:47:00,199 --> 00:47:01,800
when you are tasked to do something, you

1305
00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:04,199
know, you look also for the validation of

1306
00:47:04,199 --> 00:47:06,920
having done something. Yes. Yes. That that's very

1307
00:47:06,920 --> 00:47:09,327
true. You know, good job, good girl, you

1308
00:47:09,327 --> 00:47:11,321
know? We're just, like, this person said feeling

1309
00:47:11,321 --> 00:47:12,916
good that I did that thing. Yeah. Right

1310
00:47:12,996 --> 00:47:14,990
Yeah. You yeah. For sure. So so there

1311
00:47:14,990 --> 00:47:15,708
there is that.

1312
00:47:16,346 --> 00:47:16,800
And

1313
00:47:18,036 --> 00:47:18,514
that that...

1314
00:47:22,981 --> 00:47:25,374
The the the part of me that, you

1315
00:47:25,374 --> 00:47:26,592
know, is not very

1316
00:47:26,984 --> 00:47:28,820
generous is is kinda thinking,

1317
00:47:29,458 --> 00:47:31,236
well, you know, maybe this

1318
00:47:31,773 --> 00:47:34,168
don doesn't know what to do with a

1319
00:47:34,168 --> 00:47:36,178
service hub or how to handle them. They

1320
00:47:36,178 --> 00:47:37,929
might not... And this person doesn't even call

1321
00:47:37,929 --> 00:47:39,840
themselves a service. Yeah. They just know they,

1322
00:47:39,920 --> 00:47:41,136
like, axe of service and.

1323
00:47:41,751 --> 00:47:44,954
Mentally screaming, go, learn about service missing. Right.

1324
00:47:45,275 --> 00:47:47,434
Yeah. Yeah. Sounds a little bit like you

1325
00:47:47,434 --> 00:47:48,255
bum also.

1326
00:47:49,275 --> 00:47:50,715
The word you said is the first word

1327
00:47:50,715 --> 00:47:52,485
that came to mind. And that's accountability. Yeah.

1328
00:47:52,644 --> 00:47:54,390
Alright. Because I've had this conversation with you.

1329
00:47:54,629 --> 00:47:56,692
When there are things that I know I

1330
00:47:56,692 --> 00:47:58,915
need to get done, but good god almighty.

1331
00:47:59,153 --> 00:48:00,582
I don't wanna fucking do it.

1332
00:48:01,311 --> 00:48:03,535
I know we should I should clean this

1333
00:48:03,535 --> 00:48:05,202
more often do that, and this would be

1334
00:48:05,202 --> 00:48:07,108
really good for me. Like, I'm not stupid.

1335
00:48:07,346 --> 00:48:08,775
I have fucking know all of it and

1336
00:48:08,775 --> 00:48:09,967
something within me,

1337
00:48:10,619 --> 00:48:11,119
just.

1338
00:48:12,057 --> 00:48:15,414
Right? Yeah. Whether it's executive dysfunction, whether it's

1339
00:48:15,414 --> 00:48:15,914
just

1340
00:48:16,293 --> 00:48:18,931
procrastination, whether it's, like, I I've learned too

1341
00:48:18,931 --> 00:48:20,184
many things so I know it could be

1342
00:48:20,224 --> 00:48:21,605
any reason. You're dangerous.

1343
00:48:22,065 --> 00:48:22,565
Whatever

1344
00:48:22,945 --> 00:48:25,664
the thing is that prevents me from knowing

1345
00:48:25,664 --> 00:48:27,824
what to do and then just fucking doing

1346
00:48:27,824 --> 00:48:29,749
it. Any whatever that is.

1347
00:48:30,701 --> 00:48:32,763
In power exchange, Mh.

1348
00:48:33,556 --> 00:48:35,619
Especially because I love to do things for

1349
00:48:35,619 --> 00:48:38,099
the people I care about, True. But also,

1350
00:48:38,258 --> 00:48:40,091
yes, the validation. I come to you and

1351
00:48:40,091 --> 00:48:41,684
go look, I need you to hold me

1352
00:48:41,684 --> 00:48:44,329
accountable. Yeah. You don't give a fuck. I

1353
00:48:44,329 --> 00:48:45,688
do this. I mean you might care for

1354
00:48:45,688 --> 00:48:46,647
me because whatever.

1355
00:48:47,206 --> 00:48:49,763
But I know that I... And this is

1356
00:48:49,763 --> 00:48:52,181
what I would tell this person. Mh. The

1357
00:48:52,240 --> 00:48:52,980
conversation is

1358
00:48:53,293 --> 00:48:54,885
I don't need you to tell me what

1359
00:48:54,885 --> 00:48:56,079
to do for everything,

1360
00:48:56,477 --> 00:48:58,786
and I don't need everything I do to

1361
00:48:58,786 --> 00:49:01,349
be for you. Right? Because I I wonder

1362
00:49:01,349 --> 00:49:03,107
if that Dom is a little overwhelmed by

1363
00:49:03,107 --> 00:49:05,585
that? Like, why is doing your basic home

1364
00:49:05,585 --> 00:49:07,503
chores for me? Like, how does that work?

1365
00:49:07,742 --> 00:49:07,822
Right?

1366
00:49:08,701 --> 00:49:10,195
The conversation you and I've had. I want

1367
00:49:10,315 --> 00:49:12,392
person have is I need to be held

1368
00:49:12,392 --> 00:49:15,029
accountable. Mh. So the real conversation is,

1369
00:49:15,987 --> 00:49:17,505
here the things I struggle with doing,

1370
00:49:18,876 --> 00:49:21,283
I need a counter balance to know that

1371
00:49:21,498 --> 00:49:23,245
you're looking to see if I've done them,

1372
00:49:23,881 --> 00:49:26,105
not because it was actually for you, but

1373
00:49:26,105 --> 00:49:27,614
the... If I get them done,

1374
00:49:28,662 --> 00:49:29,854
Dom has some like,

1375
00:49:30,887 --> 00:49:32,874
good job or they're happy or they're proud

1376
00:49:32,874 --> 00:49:35,496
or their whatever, but the the outside...

1377
00:49:35,973 --> 00:49:36,688
What's the word?

1378
00:49:37,419 --> 00:49:38,213
There's a word I want.

1379
00:49:40,197 --> 00:49:41,546
It's not pressure, but a little bit of

1380
00:49:41,546 --> 00:49:44,086
the outside pressure. Mh. To get the thing

1381
00:49:44,086 --> 00:49:45,594
done is how shit gets done.

1382
00:49:46,484 --> 00:49:48,822
And so if I believe

1383
00:49:49,361 --> 00:49:51,599
even at if it's just mind factory. I

1384
00:49:51,599 --> 00:49:53,517
believe that I am accountable to you to

1385
00:49:53,517 --> 00:49:55,515
get my shit done. And that there might

1386
00:49:55,515 --> 00:49:58,235
even be a consequence if I don't. This

1387
00:49:58,235 --> 00:50:00,301
person might very well be a person who's

1388
00:50:00,301 --> 00:50:01,834
like, I don't want fucking consequences.

1389
00:50:02,288 --> 00:50:03,480
We'll then do your fucking shit. You know,

1390
00:50:04,606 --> 00:50:06,909
but but the idea that there could be

1391
00:50:06,909 --> 00:50:09,077
a consequence might be enough of a motivator

1392
00:50:09,688 --> 00:50:12,007
and enough of a... Okay. I I you

1393
00:50:12,007 --> 00:50:12,166
know,

1394
00:50:12,960 --> 00:50:14,152
they're gonna come to me if I don't

1395
00:50:14,152 --> 00:50:16,059
get this shit done. Or I have to

1396
00:50:16,059 --> 00:50:17,728
admit to them that I did not get

1397
00:50:17,728 --> 00:50:19,874
this thing done. Whatever it is that gets

1398
00:50:19,874 --> 00:50:21,795
that person like in their head space and

1399
00:50:21,795 --> 00:50:23,858
doing their shit and knowing that at the

1400
00:50:23,858 --> 00:50:25,446
end of the day, it's their dom who's

1401
00:50:25,446 --> 00:50:26,795
gonna be looking to see, did they do

1402
00:50:26,795 --> 00:50:27,113
their shit.

1403
00:50:28,065 --> 00:50:28,565
I

1404
00:50:29,907 --> 00:50:32,930
I don't necessarily think that a dom has

1405
00:50:32,930 --> 00:50:35,634
to be invested in the tasks itself.

1406
00:50:36,604 --> 00:50:37,562
I think it can be...

1407
00:50:38,280 --> 00:50:40,115
If you're not invested in the actual tasks,

1408
00:50:40,594 --> 00:50:43,466
it can be in the did my submissive

1409
00:50:43,466 --> 00:50:43,966
partner

1410
00:50:44,676 --> 00:50:46,980
do the things they assured me they would

1411
00:50:46,980 --> 00:50:48,966
do. And if they did not,

1412
00:50:49,602 --> 00:50:52,621
do I express some level of disappointment that

1413
00:50:52,621 --> 00:50:55,663
hit them in in the sub fields wherever

1414
00:50:55,663 --> 00:50:58,292
that might be. Mh. That keeps them motivated.

1415
00:50:58,531 --> 00:50:58,930
And I...

1416
00:50:59,647 --> 00:51:00,045
Also,

1417
00:51:00,603 --> 00:51:02,297
why do we have to be motivated

1418
00:51:02,689 --> 00:51:04,441
do bullshit stuff like chores.

1419
00:51:05,158 --> 00:51:07,490
Like, I if everybody gets fucking un unregulated

1420
00:51:07,547 --> 00:51:09,618
to do boring shit. Some of us are

1421
00:51:09,618 --> 00:51:12,663
just like... It's bigger for us. But everybody's

1422
00:51:12,663 --> 00:51:15,320
fucking like that. So if

1423
00:51:15,699 --> 00:51:16,498
outside pressure,

1424
00:51:17,137 --> 00:51:18,116
outside accountability,

1425
00:51:19,150 --> 00:51:21,168
is more fucking effective,

1426
00:51:21,946 --> 00:51:24,422
and the shit's still getting done if the

1427
00:51:24,422 --> 00:51:26,281
dom is willing and, of course, the dom

1428
00:51:26,340 --> 00:51:27,872
gets to side if they're willing to play

1429
00:51:27,872 --> 00:51:28,591
this game. Sure.

1430
00:51:29,549 --> 00:51:30,986
It is kind of a game because the

1431
00:51:30,986 --> 00:51:32,843
dom ultimately doesn't give a fuck

1432
00:51:33,381 --> 00:51:34,978
If the chores is done, but what they

1433
00:51:34,978 --> 00:51:36,276
might care about is

1434
00:51:36,829 --> 00:51:38,104
did you do a thing I expected you

1435
00:51:38,104 --> 00:51:39,539
to? Because that's a power thing. That's a

1436
00:51:39,539 --> 00:51:40,017
control thing.

1437
00:51:40,735 --> 00:51:42,568
And I'm curious because there have been things.

1438
00:51:42,887 --> 00:51:44,003
You've done this for me on.

1439
00:51:45,371 --> 00:51:47,833
Did it really fucking matter about the thing

1440
00:51:47,833 --> 00:51:49,978
being done or was it more that I

1441
00:51:49,978 --> 00:51:51,407
did what I was supposed to do because

1442
00:51:51,407 --> 00:51:53,234
you have control over me. In combination of

1443
00:51:53,234 --> 00:51:53,472
both.

1444
00:51:55,238 --> 00:51:56,994
Combination of both because that's I helped my

1445
00:51:56,994 --> 00:51:58,272
example, But Know where I was going with

1446
00:51:58,272 --> 00:51:59,230
it. Yeah. Right. I know...

1447
00:52:00,428 --> 00:52:02,025
I know what you're trying to do, but

1448
00:52:02,025 --> 00:52:04,360
the the fact of the matter for me

1449
00:52:04,913 --> 00:52:07,306
is I am the type a person, maybe

1450
00:52:07,306 --> 00:52:09,300
a little too pragmatic. I'm not gonna give

1451
00:52:09,300 --> 00:52:10,815
you task just for the sake of giving

1452
00:52:10,815 --> 00:52:12,171
you a task. If I give you a

1453
00:52:12,171 --> 00:52:13,846
task, it's because it needs to be done.

1454
00:52:14,005 --> 00:52:15,856
And that that's might be that same way,

1455
00:52:16,096 --> 00:52:17,952
but there's still stuff I need to do

1456
00:52:18,091 --> 00:52:20,326
that you don't... I mean, it doesn't affect

1457
00:52:20,326 --> 00:52:22,822
you if I don't do a through. So

1458
00:52:23,454 --> 00:52:25,764
it's not a task you would assign to

1459
00:52:25,764 --> 00:52:27,995
me that you would care if I did

1460
00:52:27,995 --> 00:52:29,748
it or not. Like, it wouldn't... You might...

1461
00:52:30,067 --> 00:52:31,673
My point is the what the reason you

1462
00:52:31,673 --> 00:52:33,742
would care is not because the lack of

1463
00:52:33,742 --> 00:52:34,958
the thing being done

1464
00:52:35,492 --> 00:52:36,367
impacts you. Mh.

1465
00:52:36,923 --> 00:52:37,321
More,

1466
00:52:37,894 --> 00:52:40,211
you control me to the extent that we've

1467
00:52:40,211 --> 00:52:42,289
negotiated, and I didn't get a thing done

1468
00:52:42,289 --> 00:52:44,286
that you expected me to get done me

1469
00:52:44,286 --> 00:52:45,898
because I told you I would, or because

1470
00:52:45,898 --> 00:52:47,731
you went, hey, These are your normal everyday

1471
00:52:47,731 --> 00:52:50,440
chores. You need to make sure. Mh. You

1472
00:52:50,440 --> 00:52:52,752
get your shit done. Not because... And this

1473
00:52:52,752 --> 00:52:54,199
is why I think the... Fusion is in

1474
00:52:54,199 --> 00:52:56,344
this conversation. The dom is like, none of

1475
00:52:56,344 --> 00:52:58,250
this impacts me directly. Why would I tell

1476
00:52:58,250 --> 00:53:00,156
you to do it? That's not the fucking

1477
00:53:00,156 --> 00:53:02,239
not conversation. That's not the point. Right Yeah.

1478
00:53:02,479 --> 00:53:03,997
And that's where I think that's getting lost

1479
00:53:03,997 --> 00:53:06,474
in translation. The person this is miss. I

1480
00:53:06,474 --> 00:53:07,374
need accountability.

1481
00:53:07,993 --> 00:53:08,893
I need somebody

1482
00:53:09,352 --> 00:53:11,644
who is not... Doesn't have to be impacted

1483
00:53:11,764 --> 00:53:14,311
I mean doing this. Mh. But we'll make

1484
00:53:14,311 --> 00:53:16,778
sure. We'll check in. Like, it's a little

1485
00:53:16,778 --> 00:53:18,449
bit of emotional labor on the part of

1486
00:53:18,449 --> 00:53:18,847
the dom.

1487
00:53:19,977 --> 00:53:22,708
Maybe maybe physical labor if they're consequence.

1488
00:53:23,165 --> 00:53:25,635
But like, it's not the the dom doesn't

1489
00:53:25,635 --> 00:53:27,204
even have to think of what the task

1490
00:53:27,562 --> 00:53:27,880
are.

1491
00:53:28,515 --> 00:53:31,214
This... The first task could be, the submissive

1492
00:53:31,214 --> 00:53:33,222
brings the list of tasks that they

1493
00:53:34,072 --> 00:53:34,969
find challenging

1494
00:53:35,501 --> 00:53:36,946
and go, these are the things I'm supposed

1495
00:53:36,946 --> 00:53:38,617
to get done on whatever schedule I don't

1496
00:53:38,617 --> 00:53:40,845
fucking them mh. And I need to know

1497
00:53:40,845 --> 00:53:42,061
that if I'm not

1498
00:53:42,675 --> 00:53:44,359
getting this done as And it's a little

1499
00:53:44,359 --> 00:53:46,504
bit of role play. Air quote for you.

1500
00:53:47,537 --> 00:53:49,682
Not because it benefits the Dom because the

1501
00:53:49,682 --> 00:53:52,002
dom sets the expectation that, hey, these are

1502
00:53:52,002 --> 00:53:53,592
your responsibilities and you'll take care of them.

1503
00:53:54,546 --> 00:53:56,375
You know, if they can... If the dog

1504
00:53:56,375 --> 00:53:58,998
can wrap their head around that, I think

1505
00:53:58,998 --> 00:54:00,271
they're fine. But I think the word that

1506
00:54:00,271 --> 00:54:01,819
the wants his accountability.

1507
00:54:02,829 --> 00:54:04,657
Yeah Because... And I just say that it's...

1508
00:54:04,817 --> 00:54:05,317
That's

1509
00:54:05,929 --> 00:54:07,678
that's what what works for me.

1510
00:54:09,268 --> 00:54:10,077
Oh ready.

1511
00:54:12,701 --> 00:54:14,053
Okay. This is our last 1.

1512
00:54:14,848 --> 00:54:16,438
Alright. I don't know if I picked an

1513
00:54:16,438 --> 00:54:17,869
easy 1 or not, but here we go.

1514
00:54:18,982 --> 00:54:21,625
Difference between wanting a dom or just a

1515
00:54:21,625 --> 00:54:22,103
nice guy.

1516
00:54:22,900 --> 00:54:25,290
I 28 female, am I'm not very experienced

1517
00:54:25,290 --> 00:54:27,297
in Bd bts at all but have always

1518
00:54:27,297 --> 00:54:29,370
been very interested in having a dom or

1519
00:54:29,370 --> 00:54:31,284
someone to take care of me. I've been

1520
00:54:31,284 --> 00:54:33,437
in a very few very brief relationships with

1521
00:54:33,437 --> 00:54:35,804
dom in the past who probably were way

1522
00:54:35,924 --> 00:54:38,561
too intense given my lack of experience. Nothing

1523
00:54:38,561 --> 00:54:41,278
bad happened. I just realized these were too

1524
00:54:41,278 --> 00:54:43,196
intense and not what I was looking for.

1525
00:54:43,436 --> 00:54:44,968
I guess I'm just wondering at how do

1526
00:54:44,968 --> 00:54:45,766
subs out there,

1527
00:54:46,803 --> 00:54:48,557
act... Know that they actually want to have

1528
00:54:48,557 --> 00:54:51,030
a dominant versus a partner that just, like,

1529
00:54:51,269 --> 00:54:53,104
make sure you drink water and eat 3

1530
00:54:53,104 --> 00:54:55,355
meals a day. So first of all, for

1531
00:54:55,355 --> 00:54:57,594
some of us, it's the difference between a

1532
00:54:57,594 --> 00:54:58,474
very intense,

1533
00:54:59,275 --> 00:54:59,775
dom

1534
00:55:00,554 --> 00:55:01,375
and a caregiver

1535
00:55:02,394 --> 00:55:03,214
and a nurture.

1536
00:55:04,009 --> 00:55:05,443
It's not exclusive but the.

1537
00:55:06,001 --> 00:55:08,311
And also sometimes no. You just want somebody

1538
00:55:08,311 --> 00:55:10,223
who cares enough about you to go, yeah.

1539
00:55:10,462 --> 00:55:11,817
Did you drink water today?

1540
00:55:12,693 --> 00:55:15,025
Probably, you know, the I In you're reading

1541
00:55:15,025 --> 00:55:17,105
this, the first thing that kinda jumped out

1542
00:55:17,105 --> 00:55:17,844
at me

1543
00:55:18,465 --> 00:55:20,465
is I just want someone to take care

1544
00:55:20,465 --> 00:55:22,898
of me. I said that so fucking often

1545
00:55:22,956 --> 00:55:24,470
before I even new Bd and was a

1546
00:55:24,470 --> 00:55:24,948
fucking thing.

1547
00:55:25,585 --> 00:55:27,737
And felt bad. And felt guilty for wanting

1548
00:55:27,737 --> 00:55:29,012
it. Yeah, you know,

1549
00:55:30,539 --> 00:55:32,130
what do you mean by 1 you being

1550
00:55:32,130 --> 00:55:35,891
taken care of. Right. And what if and

1551
00:55:36,759 --> 00:55:38,903
if you are submissive, what is it that

1552
00:55:38,903 --> 00:55:40,889
you're giving in return for that caring? Like,

1553
00:55:41,128 --> 00:55:43,193
are you willing to do things for a

1554
00:55:43,193 --> 00:55:45,514
partner that you are within your boundaries? But

1555
00:55:45,514 --> 00:55:47,110
you wouldn't otherwise do if they didn't ask

1556
00:55:47,110 --> 00:55:48,626
you to or tell you to. Right? Yeah.

1557
00:55:48,945 --> 00:55:51,099
You know, where... What are your own lines

1558
00:55:51,099 --> 00:55:53,070
for what you want to give in

1559
00:55:53,590 --> 00:55:55,430
Exactly. And and I think that, you know,

1560
00:55:55,750 --> 00:55:57,530
they they say, what

1561
00:55:58,230 --> 00:56:00,010
not very experienced at Bd.

1562
00:56:01,430 --> 00:56:01,930
So

1563
00:56:03,042 --> 00:56:05,510
you know, what what are they they wanting?

1564
00:56:06,386 --> 00:56:07,819
And I think that's part of the thing.

1565
00:56:07,978 --> 00:56:10,048
They're not very experienced. I think they need

1566
00:56:10,048 --> 00:56:12,606
to figure out who they are. Right. In

1567
00:56:12,606 --> 00:56:15,066
the Bd community. And if they even find

1568
00:56:15,066 --> 00:56:16,653
an place... And if they even have a

1569
00:56:16,653 --> 00:56:19,035
place and, You know, some people think, oh,

1570
00:56:19,114 --> 00:56:21,521
this this sounds great, and, you know, they

1571
00:56:21,521 --> 00:56:22,798
they dip their toes in and they're like,

1572
00:56:23,197 --> 00:56:24,475
oh, no. This is not what I want.

1573
00:56:24,714 --> 00:56:25,933
I know. Yep. But,

1574
00:56:26,471 --> 00:56:28,387
you, you know, they they really need to

1575
00:56:28,387 --> 00:56:29,559
figure out who

1576
00:56:29,998 --> 00:56:32,308
who they are in the community and and

1577
00:56:32,308 --> 00:56:34,561
what they really want out of a Bd

1578
00:56:35,177 --> 00:56:35,814
relationship. Right.

1579
00:56:36,452 --> 00:56:39,010
Exactly. Know, exactly. Right. Said they're, you know,

1580
00:56:39,328 --> 00:56:41,076
they went into some that were too and

1581
00:56:41,076 --> 00:56:42,347
and they were too intense.

1582
00:56:43,061 --> 00:56:45,788
Like, okay. Well, That's very vague. That does

1583
00:56:45,788 --> 00:56:47,327
that mean It it's very vague

1584
00:56:48,505 --> 00:56:49,005
and

1585
00:56:50,262 --> 00:56:53,071
what were the negotiations like? Were there Where's

1586
00:56:53,071 --> 00:56:55,059
their. Yeah. And that's... They... They were a

1587
00:56:55,059 --> 00:56:57,444
little too vague because I I have, like,

1588
00:56:57,524 --> 00:56:58,875
the thoughts come in. Y'all don't know how

1589
00:56:58,875 --> 00:57:00,704
my brain works. Yeah. So on 1 hand,

1590
00:57:01,022 --> 00:57:02,079
my thought is

1591
00:57:02,948 --> 00:57:04,465
Is it too intense because it's just not

1592
00:57:04,465 --> 00:57:06,301
really for them? It doesn't matter what flavor

1593
00:57:06,301 --> 00:57:07,578
where they tried. It just wasn't for them.

1594
00:57:07,738 --> 00:57:10,553
Yeah. Valid. That's so fucking valid. Mh. Or

1595
00:57:10,692 --> 00:57:12,403
was it too intense because

1596
00:57:13,098 --> 00:57:15,248
they found a partner that fit some kind

1597
00:57:15,248 --> 00:57:16,226
of stereotype

1598
00:57:17,318 --> 00:57:19,650
or they just happened to come across a

1599
00:57:19,787 --> 00:57:22,818
potential partner that was and an intense subjective

1600
00:57:22,818 --> 00:57:25,434
here, but was like more high protocol strict,

1601
00:57:25,672 --> 00:57:28,940
more rules, like, more structured power. Exchange. Mh.

1602
00:57:29,257 --> 00:57:32,379
And their net now, their only experience and

1603
00:57:32,435 --> 00:57:35,715
truth experience and knowledge of power exchange is

1604
00:57:35,930 --> 00:57:38,331
literally 1 single way of doing it. Yeah.

1605
00:57:38,650 --> 00:57:39,627
When there are

1606
00:57:40,082 --> 00:57:42,708
a million ways to do. Yeah. I... I

1607
00:57:42,708 --> 00:57:45,015
mean, you know, they're they're they're talking about

1608
00:57:45,015 --> 00:57:45,913
this and

1609
00:57:46,864 --> 00:57:49,105
you know, the whole intent. And and why

1610
00:57:49,184 --> 00:57:50,625
I say they they need to be a

1611
00:57:50,625 --> 00:57:52,224
little bit more in tune what what they

1612
00:57:52,224 --> 00:57:52,545
want.

1613
00:57:54,559 --> 00:57:56,475
You know, is it is it like a

1614
00:57:56,475 --> 00:57:57,295
a caregiver

1615
00:57:57,753 --> 00:58:00,568
that they are really looking for and and

1616
00:58:00,946 --> 00:58:03,740
in prior to this, maybe they were in

1617
00:58:04,074 --> 00:58:05,110
like a high protocol.

1618
00:58:05,668 --> 00:58:08,319
Right. You know, and sure that would be

1619
00:58:08,536 --> 00:58:10,927
hell attempt to somebody I couldn't do it.

1620
00:58:11,484 --> 00:58:13,317
No. You couldn't. I would drive that poor

1621
00:58:13,317 --> 00:58:16,193
dog crate see. They would question whether they

1622
00:58:16,193 --> 00:58:17,860
really were in into Bd at or not.

1623
00:58:18,019 --> 00:58:19,448
By the time I was. Good question all

1624
00:58:19,448 --> 00:58:20,242
their life's choices.

1625
00:58:20,798 --> 00:58:22,863
Their own sanity. Yeah. Time I was too.

1626
00:58:23,260 --> 00:58:25,344
See I mean, saying, Be there doing my

1627
00:58:25,344 --> 00:58:27,335
own version of it. So, you know, I'm

1628
00:58:27,335 --> 00:58:29,166
yeah. In the live chat, somebody brought up

1629
00:58:29,166 --> 00:58:30,758
something that is a very good point. Yeah.

1630
00:58:31,077 --> 00:58:32,445
Why is... Why is it the difference between

1631
00:58:32,525 --> 00:58:33,957
Dom and a nice guy? Like, right. Yeah.

1632
00:58:34,196 --> 00:58:34,912
Could be nice.

1633
00:58:35,469 --> 00:58:37,698
Yeah. I what would Domino's supposed to be

1634
00:58:37,698 --> 00:58:39,051
a nice guy I mean, supposed to be

1635
00:58:39,051 --> 00:58:41,041
forever river river. Which then makes me wonder

1636
00:58:41,041 --> 00:58:43,852
what what was their experience? Yeah. Did they

1637
00:58:43,852 --> 00:58:45,210
get them a grow, like,

1638
00:58:46,010 --> 00:58:48,647
tough personal bear. Right. That was, like, these

1639
00:58:48,647 --> 00:58:50,005
are my rules and you will follow them

1640
00:58:50,005 --> 00:58:52,173
and but, like, And there was no playful

1641
00:58:52,173 --> 00:58:54,800
or silliness? Yeah. Did they... Like, what...

1642
00:58:55,596 --> 00:58:57,108
I wish I knew that because then I

1643
00:58:57,108 --> 00:58:57,665
could go, oh,

1644
00:58:58,302 --> 00:59:00,309
well, you might still not be be into

1645
00:59:00,388 --> 00:59:02,939
Bd assembly. You just got, like, 1 little

1646
00:59:02,939 --> 00:59:05,728
sliver of 1 flavor. Like, there's... There... It's

1647
00:59:05,728 --> 00:59:07,099
taste the fucking rainbow by way. Out there.

1648
00:59:07,338 --> 00:59:09,195
Like, there's so many other ways

1649
00:59:09,811 --> 00:59:11,508
to experience power.

1650
00:59:12,045 --> 00:59:13,742
But also quite frankly,

1651
00:59:15,007 --> 00:59:16,592
Even if we were not on a power

1652
00:59:16,592 --> 00:59:18,810
exchange, I was still on a partner who's

1653
00:59:18,810 --> 00:59:21,266
gonna ask me did even how many fucking

1654
00:59:21,266 --> 00:59:21,480
want

1655
00:59:22,318 --> 00:59:24,716
like, who cares enough about me as a

1656
00:59:24,716 --> 00:59:27,512
fucking human being. To care to, you know,

1657
00:59:27,752 --> 00:59:30,644
be paying attention to whether I'm functioning and

1658
00:59:30,644 --> 00:59:32,162
if you have got what I... If my

1659
00:59:32,162 --> 00:59:32,961
needs are being met.

1660
00:59:34,160 --> 00:59:36,237
You don't you don't have to go search

1661
00:59:36,237 --> 00:59:38,394
for a dime for that, but also, if

1662
00:59:38,394 --> 00:59:40,877
you find a dom, that part or be

1663
00:59:40,877 --> 00:59:43,265
included or you can negotiate that or you

1664
00:59:43,265 --> 00:59:44,937
look wait until you find the person who

1665
00:59:44,937 --> 00:59:45,494
will give you that.

1666
00:59:47,495 --> 00:59:50,033
They're not mutually exclusive. No. They're not. Now

1667
00:59:50,033 --> 00:59:51,698
it can seem that way if you come

1668
00:59:51,698 --> 00:59:53,839
across some asshole dom, some air quote dom,

1669
00:59:53,998 --> 00:59:56,407
some Yeah. 1 true way. I mean, you

1670
00:59:56,407 --> 00:59:57,846
could be like, oh God, or all of

1671
00:59:57,846 --> 00:59:59,604
these people just some motherfuckers. I mean, some

1672
00:59:59,604 --> 01:00:00,963
of them are. Yes. Yeah

1673
01:00:02,002 --> 01:00:04,295
but yeah. You, you know, it it's it

1674
01:00:04,574 --> 01:00:06,414
it it may... It... I got a chuckle

1675
01:00:06,414 --> 01:00:08,255
when you read the the title to that.

1676
01:00:08,494 --> 01:00:10,734
Yeah. You know, being a dom does not

1677
01:00:10,734 --> 01:00:10,974
mean,

1678
01:00:12,734 --> 01:00:14,829
preclude you from being a nice guy. Right.

1679
01:00:15,148 --> 01:00:15,547
You know,

1680
01:00:16,347 --> 01:00:17,725
just like you can

1681
01:00:18,344 --> 01:00:21,114
be a a non kin person in be

1682
01:00:22,425 --> 01:00:24,809
raging asshole? Total un nice person. Right.

1683
01:00:25,842 --> 01:00:27,670
Yeah. I think I think your initial thought

1684
01:00:27,670 --> 01:00:29,656
is the exact right 1. What this person

1685
01:00:29,656 --> 01:00:31,581
needs to do is to go away and

1686
01:00:31,581 --> 01:00:34,786
learn more about Bd is specifically submission and

1687
01:00:35,162 --> 01:00:35,981
the vast

1688
01:00:36,754 --> 01:00:37,254
ways

1689
01:00:37,804 --> 01:00:39,639
number of ways that it can be expressed,

1690
01:00:39,798 --> 01:00:40,037
you know,

1691
01:00:41,393 --> 01:00:44,025
and maybe even, like, be around some kinky

1692
01:00:44,025 --> 01:00:46,577
people talk to some kinky people read watch

1693
01:00:46,577 --> 01:00:47,295
whatever whatever.

1694
01:00:47,869 --> 01:00:50,745
And then think for themselves, okay. Is any

1695
01:00:50,745 --> 01:00:54,021
of this resonating with me? Right? You know,

1696
01:00:54,994 --> 01:00:57,708
because is it that they're not kinky or

1697
01:00:57,708 --> 01:00:59,624
is it that they just came across the

1698
01:00:59,624 --> 01:01:01,700
partners that were not right for them? And

1699
01:01:01,700 --> 01:01:03,956
if you don't even know what you want

1700
01:01:04,429 --> 01:01:06,986
Like... And that's... Then you you can't possibly

1701
01:01:06,986 --> 01:01:09,064
find something who's gonna fit. Sure. However, the

1702
01:01:09,064 --> 01:01:11,861
other... The caveat, like, the the parent here

1703
01:01:11,861 --> 01:01:14,035
is, you can think know what you want

1704
01:01:14,035 --> 01:01:15,795
when you go into it, try it and

1705
01:01:15,795 --> 01:01:17,954
oh. 0 hell no. This is not what

1706
01:01:18,035 --> 01:01:19,795
I want. This is not for me. And

1707
01:01:19,795 --> 01:01:21,494
either find another flavor

1708
01:01:21,807 --> 01:01:24,351
or go Yeah. I'm I'm not actually kinky.

1709
01:01:24,510 --> 01:01:26,179
I'm gonna go over here to, you know,

1710
01:01:26,655 --> 01:01:27,768
the non king side of things.

1711
01:01:28,483 --> 01:01:31,123
But so just, you know, even trying to

1712
01:01:31,123 --> 01:01:32,639
figure out what you want before you get

1713
01:01:32,639 --> 01:01:36,150
some practical experience is imperfect. Yeah. But if

1714
01:01:36,150 --> 01:01:37,448
they haven't had

1715
01:01:39,035 --> 01:01:39,535
meaningful

1716
01:01:39,987 --> 01:01:42,131
good experiences with former partners,

1717
01:01:43,242 --> 01:01:44,354
and they're questioning this.

1718
01:01:45,227 --> 01:01:47,231
I and you know, go learn more about

1719
01:01:47,231 --> 01:01:49,385
it and then ask yourself the question? Do

1720
01:01:49,545 --> 01:01:50,741
I think I could live without this?

1721
01:01:51,618 --> 01:01:53,771
Because quite quite frankly, you can either just

1722
01:01:53,771 --> 01:01:55,980
not be kinky or this might not be

1723
01:01:56,099 --> 01:01:58,003
great season in your life. Yeah. To explore

1724
01:01:58,003 --> 01:02:01,019
this. Right. Too. That's true. God knows plenty

1725
01:02:01,019 --> 01:02:03,321
of us come to it much later in

1726
01:02:03,321 --> 01:02:06,041
long. Mh. Because that's the right time to

1727
01:02:06,041 --> 01:02:07,791
actually think about it and explore it. Yeah.

1728
01:02:08,825 --> 01:02:09,325
So

1729
01:02:10,416 --> 01:02:12,619
why can't I catch my birthday? I think

1730
01:02:13,299 --> 01:02:16,036
if I'm un diagnosed, and I'm I'm

1731
01:02:16,414 --> 01:02:18,731
not confident enough too self diagnosed. But if

1732
01:02:18,811 --> 01:02:20,742
I have the 80 8DI

1733
01:02:20,742 --> 01:02:21,141
think the

1734
01:02:21,859 --> 01:02:23,852
Adhd is Ad adhd ing today.

1735
01:02:24,729 --> 01:02:26,005
And I think that's my problem.

1736
01:02:26,642 --> 01:02:28,476
Okay. So that was the last 1.

1737
01:02:29,608 --> 01:02:31,203
So Yay for that. Mh.

1738
01:02:32,798 --> 01:02:33,617
And now

1739
01:02:34,473 --> 01:02:35,770
we can go into

1740
01:02:36,307 --> 01:02:37,743
a found a section. Right.

1741
01:02:39,034 --> 01:02:40,778
And I will try really hard to catch

1742
01:02:40,778 --> 01:02:41,413
my fucking breath.

1743
01:02:42,127 --> 01:02:44,190
Yes. Hell least just do that, you know,

1744
01:02:44,586 --> 01:02:46,514
I know it's making you very nervous.

1745
01:02:47,219 --> 01:02:47,537
Kidding.

1746
01:02:48,572 --> 01:02:50,004
I go through this every once in a

1747
01:02:50,004 --> 01:02:52,255
while. I do. And it's usually when

1748
01:02:52,630 --> 01:02:54,222
the the mind is just...

1749
01:02:55,176 --> 01:02:57,101
Okay. Laughing in there. And I'm I'm not

1750
01:02:57,101 --> 01:02:58,374
used to seeing this. I don't you have

1751
01:02:58,374 --> 01:03:00,762
to talk through it? Yeah. See, I... My

1752
01:03:00,762 --> 01:03:03,706
my midday, the noon fucking stream.

1753
01:03:04,679 --> 01:03:05,639
I'm much calmer,

1754
01:03:06,199 --> 01:03:07,960
usually. Mh everyone so... I mean, we get

1755
01:03:07,960 --> 01:03:10,760
chaotic. Y'all know that. But, like, my best

1756
01:03:10,760 --> 01:03:13,735
time for focus in the day is morning

1757
01:03:13,735 --> 01:03:14,375
to midday.

1758
01:03:16,055 --> 01:03:17,894
I used all of that today.

1759
01:03:18,855 --> 01:03:21,815
Gotcha. And then went into what I can

1760
01:03:21,815 --> 01:03:24,090
only described as possibly a hyper focus

1761
01:03:24,390 --> 01:03:26,150
and got a week... I said it earlier,

1762
01:03:26,309 --> 01:03:27,769
a week's worth of worked

1763
01:03:28,150 --> 01:03:28,630
5 hours.

1764
01:03:29,349 --> 01:03:30,869
And now I think my brain is just

1765
01:03:30,869 --> 01:03:33,681
trying catch up. Yeah. Okay. Alright.

1766
01:03:34,320 --> 01:03:37,277
Alright. So we're all that being said. That

1767
01:03:37,277 --> 01:03:38,875
was plenty to be sad. Are good.

1768
01:03:39,927 --> 01:03:41,440
I don't know. I just hope I would

1769
01:03:41,440 --> 01:03:42,476
scared anybody awake.

1770
01:03:45,581 --> 01:03:47,754
Keep it y'all. We'll

1771
01:03:48,384 --> 01:03:49,342
see you next week.

1772
01:03:59,176 --> 01:04:01,012
Hey. Yes, baby girl. Can we talk to

1773
01:04:01,012 --> 01:04:01,651
the crickets, please?

1774
01:04:04,365 --> 01:04:04,605
Yeah.

1775
01:04:05,642 --> 01:04:06,974
Next week is episode 4

1776
01:04:07,332 --> 01:04:07,490
Yep.

1777
01:04:08,364 --> 01:04:10,927
That's true. Mh. I had to quickly

1778
01:04:11,936 --> 01:04:14,555
text my mother this morning. She is coming

1779
01:04:14,555 --> 01:04:16,876
for a visit. She thought mid June. I

1780
01:04:16,876 --> 01:04:18,652
looked at a calendar and went, well, that

1781
01:04:18,711 --> 01:04:20,704
starts the next week. I need to text

1782
01:04:20,704 --> 01:04:23,017
my mother. Yeah. I like, hey, you know,

1783
01:04:23,097 --> 01:04:25,091
when you're coming because we're gonna take a

1784
01:04:25,091 --> 01:04:27,012
week off when she is here. So I

1785
01:04:27,012 --> 01:04:28,464
don't... We don't have to try to navigate

1786
01:04:28,677 --> 01:04:30,422
recording and drink really what it.

1787
01:04:31,453 --> 01:04:33,198
Hannah, I'm like, have you figured that out.

1788
01:04:33,356 --> 01:04:35,128
Yeah. Because I need to, like, plan my

1789
01:04:35,128 --> 01:04:37,286
my work life here. Mh. And she goes,

1790
01:04:37,606 --> 01:04:39,384
I have no clue, but it will definitely

1791
01:04:39,443 --> 01:04:40,483
not be next week.

1792
01:04:42,320 --> 01:04:44,249
Again, the evil step dad has been... Have

1793
01:04:44,249 --> 01:04:46,556
a medical stuff go on, and they're waiting

1794
01:04:46,556 --> 01:04:48,465
for results that they're waiting to make appointments

1795
01:04:48,465 --> 01:04:49,737
and, like, there's all kinds of stuff going

1796
01:04:49,737 --> 01:04:51,108
on. She's like, just like, I gotta be.

1797
01:04:51,187 --> 01:04:53,023
And I'm like no. My I goodness. Jay

1798
01:04:53,023 --> 01:04:53,980
you had to, like, I had to go

1799
01:04:53,980 --> 01:04:55,576
through some stuff. I sure ship me there.

1800
01:04:56,374 --> 01:04:57,890
I go into the doctor's office with them

1801
01:04:57,890 --> 01:05:00,058
though I talk to the doctor, Hip what?

1802
01:05:00,297 --> 01:05:00,935
We don't know her.

1803
01:05:04,444 --> 01:05:04,683
No.

1804
01:05:05,480 --> 01:05:07,568
I will point out if the symptoms he

1805
01:05:07,568 --> 01:05:09,165
is not telling them about.

1806
01:05:11,161 --> 01:05:13,237
So, yes, I would absolutely. I would be

1807
01:05:13,237 --> 01:05:14,355
in my mom's shoes. I be like, okay,

1808
01:05:14,514 --> 01:05:15,951
I guess I I'm not leaving town when

1809
01:05:15,951 --> 01:05:18,038
there's all this medical stuff going on.

1810
01:05:19,391 --> 01:05:21,619
So Yeah. It it kinda seems that way

1811
01:05:21,619 --> 01:05:23,768
silent... And live chat Silent asked, does that

1812
01:05:23,768 --> 01:05:26,369
mean we're celebrating 400 episodes and 10000 of

1813
01:05:26,489 --> 01:05:28,240
drivers at the same time, kind of. So

1814
01:05:28,240 --> 01:05:29,911
we have the live stream on Saturday for

1815
01:05:29,911 --> 01:05:33,436
10 k subscribers. And then Wednesday will stream

1816
01:05:34,304 --> 01:05:36,702
the 4 hundredth episode that is actually going

1817
01:05:36,702 --> 01:05:38,539
to be a q and a episode, we're

1818
01:05:38,539 --> 01:05:40,238
gonna ask for questions from

1819
01:05:42,215 --> 01:05:43,028
Instagram. Mh.

1820
01:05:44,463 --> 01:05:46,215
Just because it's so much easier to organize

1821
01:05:46,215 --> 01:05:46,773
them that way.

1822
01:05:48,686 --> 01:05:50,851
So, yeah, we will be doing that. Next

1823
01:05:50,851 --> 01:05:51,010
week.

1824
01:05:52,679 --> 01:05:53,179
So

1825
01:05:55,302 --> 01:05:56,573
I could sworn there was a thing I

1826
01:05:56,573 --> 01:05:58,257
told myself, hey. We'll talk that in the

1827
01:05:58,257 --> 01:05:59,791
bonus section, gone

1828
01:06:00,881 --> 01:06:01,994
poof out of the brain.

1829
01:06:06,050 --> 01:06:06,184
But

1830
01:06:06,942 --> 01:06:07,921
you and I

1831
01:06:08,777 --> 01:06:09,277
have

1832
01:06:10,611 --> 01:06:12,446
been... It's only the second time we've done

1833
01:06:12,446 --> 01:06:14,360
it. So it's a little new.

1834
01:06:15,237 --> 01:06:17,266
But we've been a Tim thing to takes

1835
01:06:17,403 --> 01:06:19,949
stupid fucking walks for stupid mental health. Yes.

1836
01:06:20,268 --> 01:06:22,518
And it works. I fucking hate that

1837
01:06:23,610 --> 01:06:23,664
sting

1838
01:06:26,163 --> 01:06:28,884
Shit. Well, I want I look, I want

1839
01:06:28,940 --> 01:06:30,922
an... An easy for me because I'm physically

1840
01:06:30,922 --> 01:06:33,083
capable of walking. I want an easy thing

1841
01:06:33,083 --> 01:06:34,914
that actually helps, but I don't want it

1842
01:06:34,914 --> 01:06:36,744
to be the thing. Everybody tells you you're

1843
01:06:36,744 --> 01:06:38,734
supposed to do. Like something about that rubs

1844
01:06:38,734 --> 01:06:40,662
me the wrong way. Like, I don't want

1845
01:06:40,662 --> 01:06:42,259
people to be right about that, but it...

1846
01:06:42,498 --> 01:06:44,254
Mh. And I'm sure it doesn't work for

1847
01:06:44,254 --> 01:06:46,010
everybody. I would never say that. But the

1848
01:06:46,010 --> 01:06:46,889
first day we did it,

1849
01:06:47,766 --> 01:06:48,245
Monday,

1850
01:06:48,898 --> 01:06:49,795
we came at

1851
01:06:50,168 --> 01:06:52,153
sweaty mess, not because it was even all

1852
01:06:52,153 --> 01:06:54,059
that hot outside We were walking at 05:30

1853
01:06:54,059 --> 01:06:54,774
in the morning, Y'all.

1854
01:06:55,489 --> 01:06:57,014
Yes. That's the time. I said,

1855
01:06:57,813 --> 01:07:00,290
but the perry menopause just fucking takes over.

1856
01:07:00,849 --> 01:07:03,007
And I got really hot. But we came

1857
01:07:03,007 --> 01:07:05,496
in Monday morning, and I just like... Started

1858
01:07:05,496 --> 01:07:08,117
day shit. You did. And kept doing shit

1859
01:07:08,117 --> 01:07:09,547
till I finally stopped at the end of

1860
01:07:09,547 --> 01:07:11,533
the day. And kinda so did I? Like,

1861
01:07:11,692 --> 01:07:13,851
what the fuck was that? I know. And

1862
01:07:13,851 --> 01:07:16,073
then today, now today's walk all in the

1863
01:07:16,073 --> 01:07:16,628
second 1.

1864
01:07:17,421 --> 01:07:18,294
Today's walk.

1865
01:07:19,166 --> 01:07:20,436
Started out stressful. 2 things.

1866
01:07:21,085 --> 01:07:22,911
Well this morning. The first thing I do

1867
01:07:22,911 --> 01:07:24,260
when my eyes open and I turn off

1868
01:07:24,260 --> 01:07:25,609
my fucking alarm is like, pick up It's

1869
01:07:25,609 --> 01:07:26,800
not a good habit. I pick up my

1870
01:07:26,800 --> 01:07:28,244
phone, and I start looking at this things.

1871
01:07:28,404 --> 01:07:29,922
And the first app I go to. I

1872
01:07:29,922 --> 01:07:31,760
go to email first. The first app I

1873
01:07:31,760 --> 01:07:33,118
go to after that is discord because we

1874
01:07:33,118 --> 01:07:35,116
have the discord server through at Patreon. And

1875
01:07:35,276 --> 01:07:36,887
I wanna make sure things that it's not

1876
01:07:36,887 --> 01:07:38,322
on fire in this morning

1877
01:07:38,960 --> 01:07:41,034
Fuck, I thought it was on fire. So

1878
01:07:41,034 --> 01:07:41,911
before we I could go for a walk,

1879
01:07:42,070 --> 01:07:44,542
I had to, like, temporarily fix things, which

1880
01:07:44,542 --> 01:07:45,340
it's handled its.

1881
01:07:46,472 --> 01:07:48,468
Shit happens. But then we get up We...

1882
01:07:48,628 --> 01:07:49,905
So I'm already rattled before I even get

1883
01:07:49,905 --> 01:07:51,900
out the bed I'm like, I, I'd haven't

1884
01:07:51,900 --> 01:07:53,976
even wiped the crust out of my eyes.

1885
01:07:54,868 --> 01:07:55,825
This is a little early.

1886
01:07:56,702 --> 01:07:58,694
But I am too panic and 2

1887
01:07:59,092 --> 01:08:01,563
to have gone. It can wait till 07:00

1888
01:08:01,563 --> 01:08:02,934
no. It had to be done right or

1889
01:08:02,934 --> 01:08:04,612
would never... I just... I couldn't... Oh, 0

1890
01:08:04,612 --> 01:08:04,931
my god.

1891
01:08:06,130 --> 01:08:07,647
So then we're a few minutes like out

1892
01:08:07,647 --> 01:08:09,005
for a walk. We go for a walk.

1893
01:08:09,899 --> 01:08:12,716
Crazy fucking neighbor who can't keep their pets

1894
01:08:12,775 --> 01:08:13,275
inside

1895
01:08:13,654 --> 01:08:16,211
has allowed out at 05:30 in the damn

1896
01:08:16,211 --> 01:08:16,451
morning.

1897
01:08:17,264 --> 01:08:19,817
They're basically... It... He's... The dog's a puppy,

1898
01:08:19,896 --> 01:08:22,050
but like an older puppy, not quite teenage

1899
01:08:22,050 --> 01:08:24,841
dog, but not a baby baby. Mh. Like,

1900
01:08:24,921 --> 01:08:26,756
right in that stage of the ain't got

1901
01:08:26,756 --> 01:08:29,340
not a fucking manner, and that dog

1902
01:08:30,271 --> 01:08:31,942
stood at the end of his driveway and

1903
01:08:31,942 --> 01:08:33,055
used his big boy.

1904
01:08:34,423 --> 01:08:36,889
And it's a strange dog. You'd... I don't

1905
01:08:36,889 --> 01:08:39,673
we don't know. Is he protecting the homestead

1906
01:08:39,673 --> 01:08:41,759
instead? Or is he trying to play? We

1907
01:08:41,759 --> 01:08:43,916
don't fucking know, and the dog in the

1908
01:08:43,916 --> 01:08:45,514
middle of barking at us with the big

1909
01:08:45,514 --> 01:08:48,150
boy voice, got the fucking zoo.

1910
01:08:48,724 --> 01:08:49,841
Because he's essentially a baby.

1911
01:08:50,639 --> 01:08:52,475
And we were out there for a couple

1912
01:08:52,475 --> 01:08:54,072
of minutes before the woman came out. I

1913
01:08:54,072 --> 01:08:55,668
was like, luke, let me try and get

1914
01:08:55,668 --> 01:08:57,265
him I'm so sorry. It took her 5

1915
01:08:57,265 --> 01:09:00,402
minutes Get, and he was steady zooming zoom

1916
01:09:01,012 --> 01:09:03,394
marriott backyard yard boy. I was like, oh

1917
01:09:03,394 --> 01:09:04,108
my god.

1918
01:09:05,060 --> 01:09:06,331
So I don't know if that was a

1919
01:09:06,584 --> 01:09:08,735
Shorter walk today? Maybe we just picked up

1920
01:09:08,735 --> 01:09:09,213
the pace.

1921
01:09:10,170 --> 01:09:12,082
Like we we walked the same amount. Did

1922
01:09:12,082 --> 01:09:14,050
we? Have you mapped art because we shorter

1923
01:09:14,328 --> 01:09:15,203
Jb leads the routes.

1924
01:09:16,079 --> 01:09:17,591
I just said, please don't take me into

1925
01:09:17,591 --> 01:09:19,422
total darkness at 05:30 in the morning. Go

1926
01:09:19,422 --> 01:09:20,218
over there are street lights.

1927
01:09:21,889 --> 01:09:23,481
And he just... He he told me I

1928
01:09:23,481 --> 01:09:25,011
could pick pace, and then I found myself

1929
01:09:25,011 --> 01:09:26,366
following them and I was like, I... I'm

1930
01:09:26,366 --> 01:09:27,243
not setting the pace here.

1931
01:09:28,041 --> 01:09:31,151
But I today ran Monday, you definitely. I

1932
01:09:31,151 --> 01:09:33,119
know. But then I watch Jb have

1933
01:09:33,639 --> 01:09:35,237
that moment that I think many of us

1934
01:09:35,237 --> 01:09:38,353
have had of having to not behind, but

1935
01:09:38,353 --> 01:09:38,853
with

1936
01:09:39,312 --> 01:09:39,812
walk

1937
01:09:40,350 --> 01:09:40,750
slower,

1938
01:09:41,323 --> 01:09:44,184
then you possibly want to. Thankfully, he wasn't

1939
01:09:44,184 --> 01:09:45,614
behind me because that's 1 of the most

1940
01:09:45,614 --> 01:09:47,918
frustrating things, but he still kept pace with

1941
01:09:47,918 --> 01:09:48,418
me

1942
01:09:48,807 --> 01:09:50,421
and it wasn't as fast as see

1943
01:09:51,749 --> 01:09:53,339
No when I'm first start. Now I gotta

1944
01:09:53,339 --> 01:09:55,167
get. I mean, you gotta warm this engine

1945
01:09:55,167 --> 01:09:57,496
up. Okay. I need a good my.

1946
01:09:58,203 --> 01:09:59,341
I am a bit

1947
01:10:00,594 --> 01:10:01,413
out of

1948
01:10:01,789 --> 01:10:02,289
practice

1949
01:10:02,666 --> 01:10:02,905
myself.

1950
01:10:04,020 --> 01:10:04,180
Okay.

1951
01:10:05,710 --> 01:10:06,609
Yeah. I use

1952
01:10:07,550 --> 01:10:08,590
there was a time I used to walk,

1953
01:10:08,670 --> 01:10:09,469
man. I... I'd...

1954
01:10:10,270 --> 01:10:12,349
You are a power walker. Oh, yeah. I

1955
01:10:12,349 --> 01:10:14,645
mean, I used to. I used to walk

1956
01:10:14,764 --> 01:10:17,221
5 k's and, like, actually care about beating

1957
01:10:17,221 --> 01:10:19,307
a time. So, yeah. I,

1958
01:10:20,790 --> 01:10:23,586
yeah. I I need to... Kind of... Yes.

1959
01:10:23,825 --> 01:10:24,224
But your...

1960
01:10:25,260 --> 01:10:27,891
Our fitness levels are not evenly matched. True.

1961
01:10:28,131 --> 01:10:30,283
True true true. So you're. True true true.

1962
01:10:30,602 --> 01:10:33,652
Slow is... I, oh, goodness Nothing and puff

1963
01:10:33,652 --> 01:10:34,451
a little bit.

1964
01:10:36,449 --> 01:10:36,769
Yeah.

1965
01:10:37,967 --> 01:10:39,486
So Oh god.

1966
01:10:41,578 --> 01:10:42,617
My sneakers are not.

1967
01:10:43,337 --> 01:10:45,893
Mine mine neither. I've got my sneakers are

1968
01:10:45,893 --> 01:10:47,572
really bad. I really need to replace them,

1969
01:10:47,731 --> 01:10:49,182
but that has not been a priority and

1970
01:10:49,182 --> 01:10:50,534
so we'll we'll work on and it'll be

1971
01:10:50,534 --> 01:10:51,409
fine. I'm still going.

1972
01:10:52,046 --> 01:10:53,716
Good so... And it it really...

1973
01:10:54,272 --> 01:10:56,817
I mean, can I blame whatever today's focus

1974
01:10:56,817 --> 01:10:58,779
thing was on the stupid walk for my

1975
01:10:58,978 --> 01:11:01,204
mental health? Am I like this now because

1976
01:11:01,363 --> 01:11:02,635
I got up at 05:30 and I went

1977
01:11:02,635 --> 01:11:04,702
for a walk. Mh. Can I can I

1978
01:11:04,702 --> 01:11:05,440
can I

1979
01:11:05,974 --> 01:11:06,769
use that as the?

1980
01:11:07,802 --> 01:11:10,128
It's not a me, it's the stupid walk.

1981
01:11:10,765 --> 01:11:11,483
05:30.

1982
01:11:12,360 --> 01:11:13,396
Yeah. And

1983
01:11:14,194 --> 01:11:17,157
silent, yes. It is still dark at 05:30.

1984
01:11:18,823 --> 01:11:20,673
But as it... As summer

1985
01:11:22,158 --> 01:11:24,484
progresses. Yeah. Well, we're we're almost at the

1986
01:11:24,793 --> 01:11:26,384
20 first, which was the longest day of

1987
01:11:26,384 --> 01:11:28,234
the year anyway. I mean... But

1988
01:11:29,404 --> 01:11:31,550
it... You know, yes. At at 05:30, it

1989
01:11:31,550 --> 01:11:32,185
is still dark.

1990
01:11:34,187 --> 01:11:36,808
But by the time we wake up, get

1991
01:11:36,808 --> 01:11:39,350
dressed and and get outside, it is starting

1992
01:11:39,350 --> 01:11:41,335
to get light. Yeah I mean... It's not

1993
01:11:41,335 --> 01:11:42,765
totally. Wouldn't read a book buy it, but,

1994
01:11:42,923 --> 01:11:45,490
yeah. You see the skylight. It's not gonna

1995
01:11:45,490 --> 01:11:47,805
be sun either, you know, but it's But

1996
01:11:47,805 --> 01:11:49,583
even as we get a little bit closer

1997
01:11:49,641 --> 01:11:50,141
to

1998
01:11:50,520 --> 01:11:51,877
the E or whatever,

1999
01:11:52,515 --> 01:11:54,914
it'll sun sunrise will back up a little

2000
01:11:54,914 --> 01:11:56,899
bit. Right now, our sunrise is, like, at

2001
01:11:56,899 --> 01:11:57,534
06:30,

2002
01:11:58,328 --> 01:12:00,947
the the full official Sunrise. Mh. I wanna

2003
01:12:00,947 --> 01:12:02,632
say, right at the not we get to

2004
01:12:02,632 --> 01:12:05,342
about 06:15 when we get sunrise. So we'll

2005
01:12:05,342 --> 01:12:06,857
get a couple weeks where it'll lighten up

2006
01:12:06,857 --> 01:12:08,610
a little bit more. Oh, yeah. And then

2007
01:12:08,610 --> 01:12:10,204
we'll be on the other side. And sorry

2008
01:12:10,379 --> 01:12:12,131
Going the other way. Yeah. But the nice

2009
01:12:12,131 --> 01:12:13,885
thing is is once it gets cool the

2010
01:12:13,885 --> 01:12:14,761
time changes,

2011
01:12:15,319 --> 01:12:17,868
we'll just walk in the evening and we'll

2012
01:12:17,868 --> 01:12:18,585
be okay.

2013
01:12:19,700 --> 01:12:20,908
So so... Yep.

2014
01:12:21,942 --> 01:12:22,442
But

2015
01:12:23,134 --> 01:12:23,690
you know.

2016
01:12:28,538 --> 01:12:28,936
What out?

2017
01:12:31,021 --> 01:12:33,274
I don't wanna talk about too much because

2018
01:12:33,412 --> 01:12:35,642
we got Saturday. Got Saturday. Yeah. I know.

2019
01:12:35,881 --> 01:12:37,805
And I think enough interesting things are gonna

2020
01:12:37,805 --> 01:12:39,555
have a trade. I was just gonna say

2021
01:12:39,635 --> 01:12:41,226
That just means we got do shit between

2022
01:12:41,226 --> 01:12:42,896
now and then. I mean, I got work

2023
01:12:42,896 --> 01:12:45,304
to do. That's that's funny. I only have

2024
01:12:45,304 --> 01:12:47,458
1 more doctor's appointment with the kid this

2025
01:12:47,458 --> 01:12:48,895
week. So that was good.

2026
01:12:49,613 --> 01:12:51,462
Got don't out the way. The way you

2027
01:12:51,462 --> 01:12:53,394
were saying, I thought there was gonna be

2028
01:12:53,929 --> 01:12:56,157
several doctor's appointments every day this week.

2029
01:12:56,794 --> 01:12:58,943
No. That's just me me in the hyper

2030
01:12:58,943 --> 01:12:59,579
way I speak.

2031
01:13:00,867 --> 01:13:02,720
I figured that. It was 3

2032
01:13:03,572 --> 01:13:04,072
appointments

2033
01:13:04,925 --> 01:13:06,595
over the course of the week. And for

2034
01:13:06,595 --> 01:13:08,913
me, that was just... A bunch of fucking

2035
01:13:08,913 --> 01:13:11,291
appointments. Yeah. But also there was a phone

2036
01:13:11,291 --> 01:13:12,558
call with a teacher that had to be

2037
01:13:12,558 --> 01:13:13,033
factored in,

2038
01:13:13,826 --> 01:13:16,537
Stuff. But, yeah. The 14 year old is

2039
01:13:16,537 --> 01:13:17,966
still on his health journey, but we are

2040
01:13:17,966 --> 01:13:19,395
getting more answers, so that is an nice

2041
01:13:19,633 --> 01:13:20,133
We're.

2042
01:13:20,982 --> 01:13:23,381
And and we're starting to make little tiny

2043
01:13:23,381 --> 01:13:25,533
progress here. It... Yeah. It's only been a

2044
01:13:25,533 --> 01:13:27,287
couple days and I'm already seeing it. Yes.

2045
01:13:28,164 --> 01:13:29,997
We discovered a delightful.

2046
01:13:30,969 --> 01:13:33,830
Health professional, that's on the kids team,

2047
01:13:34,704 --> 01:13:35,204
diet,

2048
01:13:35,817 --> 01:13:38,853
who was so delightful. We were quoting as

2049
01:13:38,853 --> 01:13:40,126
we walked back to the car.

2050
01:13:41,081 --> 01:13:42,752
Write on. Write on. Right on. Write on.

2051
01:13:45,537 --> 01:13:47,819
Every time, he was asking the kid question

2052
01:13:48,018 --> 01:13:49,689
I was trying to like, not to talk

2053
01:13:49,689 --> 01:13:51,360
too much, but mh kind of supply stuff.

2054
01:13:51,838 --> 01:13:55,122
And if what he heard was either usable

2055
01:13:55,737 --> 01:13:57,843
information or I think positive

2056
01:13:58,218 --> 01:13:58,456
information.

2057
01:13:59,171 --> 01:14:01,000
He would before he would tell us the

2058
01:14:01,000 --> 01:14:03,940
medical thing. His first response was right right

2059
01:14:03,940 --> 01:14:06,819
on. We've walked throughout this house. For the

2060
01:14:06,819 --> 01:14:08,574
rest of the week just going, right on

2061
01:14:08,574 --> 01:14:08,973
right on.

2062
01:14:10,171 --> 01:14:12,006
He was wonderful. He was fucking wonderful if

2063
01:14:12,006 --> 01:14:13,523
he was he was he was...

2064
01:14:14,241 --> 01:14:14,741
I

2065
01:14:15,854 --> 01:14:17,774
I liked him. Did. I him... I I

2066
01:14:17,774 --> 01:14:18,755
liked him. He

2067
01:14:20,095 --> 01:14:21,774
explained a lot of things.

2068
01:14:22,749 --> 01:14:24,347
Gap. I mean, he went over a whole

2069
01:14:24,347 --> 01:14:26,185
medical lesson and that That was amazing.

2070
01:14:26,743 --> 01:14:28,661
And and he did it in a way.

2071
01:14:30,112 --> 01:14:32,813
That we all understood it. Yes. Without being

2072
01:14:32,813 --> 01:14:35,594
condescending? Right. Absolutely. Absolutely. And and it was...

2073
01:14:35,832 --> 01:14:38,318
That in and of itself just amazing. Mh.

2074
01:14:38,557 --> 01:14:40,954
Mh. I mean, it helped me even learn

2075
01:14:40,954 --> 01:14:43,032
some things about myself. I know. I haven't

2076
01:14:43,032 --> 01:14:44,310
been able to have dessert.

2077
01:14:44,884 --> 01:14:46,557
For the past couple nights since Lauren I

2078
01:14:46,557 --> 01:14:48,631
a few things I'm like damn it. I

2079
01:14:48,631 --> 01:14:50,623
don't have 3 hours to sit up right

2080
01:14:50,623 --> 01:14:51,341
after I.

2081
01:14:53,349 --> 01:14:56,220
Right. So fully touch it. Yeah. Damn it.

2082
01:14:56,619 --> 01:14:57,576
Yeah. I know.

2083
01:15:00,128 --> 01:15:02,202
But, no. He he was he was a

2084
01:15:02,202 --> 01:15:02,760
big help.

2085
01:15:04,213 --> 01:15:04,713
And

2086
01:15:08,207 --> 01:15:08,686
silent

2087
01:15:09,246 --> 01:15:10,858
I absolutely thought about math Mc.

2088
01:15:12,135 --> 01:15:12,453
Talking.

2089
01:15:13,490 --> 01:15:15,724
Maybe he's just heavily influenced by Matthew Mc

2090
01:15:15,724 --> 01:15:17,819
mckenna and Matthew Mc mckenna is his personal

2091
01:15:18,355 --> 01:15:19,871
hero. Yeah. I'm here for that.

2092
01:15:20,842 --> 01:15:23,149
So... But, no. With with with some of

2093
01:15:23,149 --> 01:15:24,899
the stuff he will... He was talking about,

2094
01:15:26,728 --> 01:15:28,094
we we had started,

2095
01:15:28,808 --> 01:15:29,998
slowly implementing it.

2096
01:15:30,871 --> 01:15:31,371
And

2097
01:15:32,299 --> 01:15:34,520
just in a few days, we have started

2098
01:15:34,520 --> 01:15:35,734
seeing some positive

2099
01:15:36,122 --> 01:15:38,502
Yeah but positive changes. Yeah.

2100
01:15:39,296 --> 01:15:41,199
And for how deep some of the issues

2101
01:15:41,199 --> 01:15:42,548
went to even see, I mean,

2102
01:15:43,277 --> 01:15:44,707
I didn't expect to see changes at all

2103
01:15:44,707 --> 01:15:47,090
this Quickly, but small ones are it's huge.

2104
01:15:47,328 --> 01:15:47,488
Yeah.

2105
01:15:48,202 --> 01:15:50,426
Yeah. We'll follow up with the diet attrition

2106
01:15:50,426 --> 01:15:52,135
right on right on. The

2107
01:15:53,792 --> 01:15:55,470
which will also be the kids,

2108
01:15:56,189 --> 01:15:57,728
the kids Gi doctor

2109
01:15:58,587 --> 01:16:01,954
is retiring. Yeah. And the kid's appointment with

2110
01:16:01,954 --> 01:16:04,187
him is the dudes last day. And we

2111
01:16:04,187 --> 01:16:06,978
also learned at this appointment because he's he's

2112
01:16:06,978 --> 01:16:09,131
he's retiring from age, like, not, like, after.

2113
01:16:09,863 --> 01:16:11,215
We also learned that,

2114
01:16:12,009 --> 01:16:13,916
apparently, the... Those in the office who work

2115
01:16:13,916 --> 01:16:16,323
with the Gi doctor, call them grandpa

2116
01:16:16,777 --> 01:16:17,277
grandpa.

2117
01:16:19,257 --> 01:16:20,849
I hope it was said with love and

2118
01:16:20,849 --> 01:16:21,804
infection. Right. Right.

2119
01:16:22,440 --> 01:16:22,679
Right?

2120
01:16:24,192 --> 01:16:26,022
Right. I I hope it's meant as a

2121
01:16:26,022 --> 01:16:28,011
term of deal. Exactly. Exactly.

2122
01:16:29,621 --> 01:16:30,121
So

2123
01:16:32,490 --> 01:16:33,845
Kim, could we go back to the new

2124
01:16:33,845 --> 01:16:35,122
dessert because of the 3 hours thing. 1

2125
01:16:35,122 --> 01:16:37,216
of the things the diet explained to us

2126
01:16:37,928 --> 01:16:39,924
we were talking about what the kid is

2127
01:16:39,924 --> 01:16:41,920
dealing with. And so the thing you want

2128
01:16:41,920 --> 01:16:43,676
them to do is, I think specifically because

2129
01:16:43,676 --> 01:16:45,033
of this, But I think it's a best

2130
01:16:45,033 --> 01:16:46,731
practice. And that is

2131
01:16:47,600 --> 01:16:49,745
the reason the reason it's recommended that you

2132
01:16:49,745 --> 01:16:51,413
don't eat something heavier or eat food and

2133
01:16:51,413 --> 01:16:53,082
then immediately go to bed is because apparently,

2134
01:16:53,241 --> 01:16:54,218
once you lay flat

2135
01:16:54,766 --> 01:16:57,707
body... Like, you stop digesting. Right? And so

2136
01:16:57,707 --> 01:16:59,139
if you eat too much and immediately go

2137
01:16:59,139 --> 01:17:00,331
to bed that's kinda why you wake up

2138
01:17:00,331 --> 01:17:02,875
film like crap. So the recommendation for the

2139
01:17:02,875 --> 01:17:03,113
kid,

2140
01:17:03,923 --> 01:17:06,381
is after his last meal, he needs to

2141
01:17:06,381 --> 01:17:08,998
sit at at least 45 degree angle or

2142
01:17:08,998 --> 01:17:09,712
more up,

2143
01:17:10,267 --> 01:17:12,186
so that his body is still work and

2144
01:17:12,186 --> 01:17:15,206
digesting. Right. 3 hours before he Mh. For

2145
01:17:15,206 --> 01:17:16,796
at least 3 hours. So in that way,

2146
01:17:16,876 --> 01:17:18,385
it was really 3 hours before bed, but

2147
01:17:18,385 --> 01:17:19,911
that kid stays up late it's for 3

2148
01:17:19,911 --> 01:17:22,216
hours. I not I never heard that before.

2149
01:17:22,693 --> 01:17:25,078
None of us have had, you know, we're

2150
01:17:25,078 --> 01:17:26,906
we're aware of the fact you know, when

2151
01:17:26,906 --> 01:17:29,226
he was telling us that when... So when

2152
01:17:29,226 --> 01:17:32,006
you lay down. Everything stops. Everything stops working.

2153
01:17:32,403 --> 01:17:35,578
Sense. Everything everything stops working. He he explained

2154
01:17:35,578 --> 01:17:36,714
to us the whole process

2155
01:17:37,025 --> 01:17:39,604
of how when you swallow? We had diagrams

2156
01:17:39,664 --> 01:17:40,324
on the.

2157
01:17:40,864 --> 01:17:43,104
A diagram going and everything. And it was

2158
01:17:43,104 --> 01:17:44,625
a whole ass lesson he showed us is

2159
01:17:44,625 --> 01:17:46,739
a teaching hospital So I'm pretty sure

2160
01:17:47,280 --> 01:17:49,439
that or a teaching facility. So he's used

2161
01:17:49,439 --> 01:17:51,920
to doing the teaching part. So what's happening

2162
01:17:51,920 --> 01:17:53,600
is it might be 09:00 before I go

2163
01:17:53,600 --> 01:17:55,613
fuck, I wanna deserve I'm like, I'm not

2164
01:17:55,613 --> 01:17:56,172
sitting up it.

2165
01:17:57,291 --> 01:17:59,608
Now, for something like dessert, do you need

2166
01:17:59,608 --> 01:18:02,178
the 3 hours? Probably not, but... And the

2167
01:18:02,178 --> 01:18:04,570
diet right on right on has not told

2168
01:18:04,570 --> 01:18:07,541
me otherwise Lola agrees. Well agrees. So

2169
01:18:10,404 --> 01:18:11,763
just want attention. But...

2170
01:18:13,841 --> 01:18:14,160
Yeah.

2171
01:18:15,759 --> 01:18:16,259
So,

2172
01:18:16,717 --> 01:18:18,475
yeah, it's really fucked up my ability to

2173
01:18:18,475 --> 01:18:20,326
eat dessert. This past couple days, which is

2174
01:18:20,326 --> 01:18:22,161
not a bad thing. I'm pretty sure. I

2175
01:18:22,161 --> 01:18:22,900
didn't need

2176
01:18:23,278 --> 01:18:25,351
too much more dessert. Now. But, yeah, now,

2177
01:18:25,511 --> 01:18:27,106
I'm, I'm, like, paying attention to the clock

2178
01:18:27,106 --> 01:18:28,542
when I eat something. I'm like, well, it's

2179
01:18:28,542 --> 01:18:30,551
dinner time. We're not going to bed too

2180
01:18:30,551 --> 01:18:31,369
soon. It's

2181
01:18:33,661 --> 01:18:36,293
But, yeah, It's just it's kind of...

2182
01:18:37,011 --> 01:18:38,367
I think it's kind of... It is a

2183
01:18:38,367 --> 01:18:40,380
relief to feel like we have not just

2184
01:18:40,380 --> 01:18:42,860
answers because kid was getting diagnoses left right

2185
01:18:42,860 --> 01:18:45,100
and center. But then there's like, hey. Here's

2186
01:18:45,100 --> 01:18:47,020
the thing you do about this side.

2187
01:18:47,739 --> 01:18:49,594
You And what I really liked about the

2188
01:18:49,594 --> 01:18:50,635
diet. He was, like,

2189
01:18:51,274 --> 01:18:53,354
here's why this happens. Here's how this happens.

2190
01:18:53,515 --> 01:18:55,755
Yeah. And it was aligning with everything we've

2191
01:18:55,755 --> 01:18:57,688
been watching happen for, like, 3 years and

2192
01:18:57,688 --> 01:18:58,726
are like, oh,

2193
01:18:59,285 --> 01:19:01,443
I seen where that happened. Okay. That makes

2194
01:19:01,443 --> 01:19:03,200
sense to me. So that's nice.

2195
01:19:04,014 --> 01:19:06,091
Is. It's it was nice. It was it

2196
01:19:06,091 --> 01:19:08,089
was refreshing. Yeah. And a little bit of

2197
01:19:08,089 --> 01:19:08,988
a weight lifted

2198
01:19:09,367 --> 01:19:10,645
because it was like, oh, we have a

2199
01:19:10,645 --> 01:19:12,494
team here We have a team working on

2200
01:19:12,494 --> 01:19:15,123
this issue because this issue is the kind

2201
01:19:15,123 --> 01:19:16,796
of issue that sends people to hospital. I

2202
01:19:16,796 --> 01:19:18,390
mean, we've been looking at the kid going.

2203
01:19:18,708 --> 01:19:20,381
Is that where we're headed it? There we

2204
01:19:20,381 --> 01:19:21,453
go into hot.

2205
01:19:22,703 --> 01:19:25,248
Hopefully not. It it was weight lifted,

2206
01:19:28,350 --> 01:19:28,850
but

2207
01:19:30,037 --> 01:19:33,461
very encouraging to see the small changes in

2208
01:19:33,461 --> 01:19:34,337
the short time.

2209
01:19:35,212 --> 01:19:38,832
Well, also... That gives hope, Well, also

2210
01:19:40,002 --> 01:19:41,377
reminding ourselves that

2211
01:19:41,752 --> 01:19:43,819
these things aren't linear, so we'll do loop

2212
01:19:43,819 --> 01:19:45,091
your loops and go back and go forward

2213
01:19:45,091 --> 01:19:46,523
and jump up and go down, but... Yep.

2214
01:19:46,681 --> 01:19:47,318
Yep yep. Yeah.

2215
01:19:49,006 --> 01:19:49,722
What you said.

2216
01:19:55,062 --> 01:19:55,562
So

2217
01:19:56,033 --> 01:19:59,641
Yeah. Our we're talking about digestion and

2218
01:20:01,214 --> 01:20:03,525
stuff, and, Gi stuff.

2219
01:20:04,731 --> 01:20:06,159
That's what you come to the bonus section

2220
01:20:06,159 --> 01:20:08,142
for. Gotcha. I know I know that it

2221
01:20:08,142 --> 01:20:09,490
is. I know that it is.

2222
01:20:12,282 --> 01:20:14,668
Yeah. No. It's it's typical stuff it's work.

2223
01:20:14,828 --> 01:20:16,680
It's always work, but then it's

2224
01:20:17,692 --> 01:20:19,957
it's medical stuff. Yeah. And

2225
01:20:22,161 --> 01:20:24,865
it's dogs with big boy voices. That's but

2226
01:20:24,865 --> 01:20:25,661
what we got this week.

2227
01:20:26,313 --> 01:20:28,221
We gotta keep, like, we gotta minimize because

2228
01:20:28,221 --> 01:20:29,415
we got all Saturday night.

2229
01:20:30,369 --> 01:20:31,801
But if you've never been to,

2230
01:20:33,250 --> 01:20:35,247
evening livestream like, a Friday night, and this

2231
01:20:35,247 --> 01:20:36,605
1 will be a saturday and night It

2232
01:20:36,605 --> 01:20:38,444
gets random. It gets chaotic out. It's can

2233
01:20:38,444 --> 01:20:40,680
on purpose, Like, that's the point. We talk

2234
01:20:40,680 --> 01:20:41,814
about fucking it everything.

2235
01:20:42,531 --> 01:20:44,627
Not actually fucking everything,

2236
01:20:46,200 --> 01:20:48,354
but many, many, many topics.

2237
01:20:49,949 --> 01:20:50,449
What

2238
01:20:53,069 --> 01:20:55,373
so it... It's almost 08:30. Are we gonna

2239
01:20:55,373 --> 01:20:56,884
have time for dessert tonight or now?

2240
01:20:59,919 --> 01:21:02,859
We would have to sit up right until

2241
01:21:02,859 --> 01:21:03,677
11 minutes.

2242
01:21:04,528 --> 01:21:05,958
You wanna watch 3 episodes of?

2243
01:21:08,520 --> 01:21:10,194
I don't wanna get through season 2 and

2244
01:21:10,273 --> 01:21:12,264
Queen Charlotte too fast because I don't wanna

2245
01:21:12,264 --> 01:21:14,733
start season 3 until I could watch all

2246
01:21:14,733 --> 01:21:15,425
of season 3.

2247
01:21:19,521 --> 01:21:21,829
I mean, I'm thinking for a small thing

2248
01:21:21,829 --> 01:21:22,068
like,

2249
01:21:23,356 --> 01:21:24,631
dessert, you probably don't need the full 3

2250
01:21:24,631 --> 01:21:26,462
hours. Yeah. Because he did say after dinner,

2251
01:21:26,541 --> 01:21:28,770
which is typically right. The larger meal. With

2252
01:21:28,770 --> 01:21:30,123
the way the kids eating right now. It's

2253
01:21:30,123 --> 01:21:30,760
his largest meal.

2254
01:21:31,895 --> 01:21:32,395
So

2255
01:21:34,375 --> 01:21:35,574
maybe there can be to start.

2256
01:21:36,375 --> 01:21:37,494
Well you know what you said you know

2257
01:21:37,494 --> 01:21:38,555
wanna rush through

2258
01:21:39,175 --> 01:21:39,494
through

2259
01:21:43,346 --> 01:21:45,264
you said you don't wanna brush through Bridge.

2260
01:21:45,503 --> 01:21:47,501
I don't wanna get through too fast. I

2261
01:21:47,501 --> 01:21:47,661
think,

2262
01:21:48,634 --> 01:21:49,827
last season to sweet tooth.

2263
01:21:50,861 --> 01:21:53,247
Yeah. Is out. Feel free. I know. You're

2264
01:21:53,247 --> 01:21:54,122
you're not... You weren't.

2265
01:21:55,236 --> 01:21:56,847
Episode. It just wasn't 1 that, like, I

2266
01:21:56,847 --> 01:21:59,564
was r, Like... I've I've liked. I know

2267
01:21:59,564 --> 01:22:01,801
have, like, you were debt or Mh. Definitely

2268
01:22:01,801 --> 01:22:03,968
into it. Hey Yeah. I will say the

2269
01:22:03,968 --> 01:22:06,755
most recent doctor Hu episode was better or

2270
01:22:06,755 --> 01:22:08,984
was young? Also still good. Mh.

2271
01:22:10,019 --> 01:22:10,519
The

2272
01:22:11,309 --> 01:22:13,085
the end when you realize

2273
01:22:13,781 --> 01:22:16,174
more clearly what the actual point of this

2274
01:22:16,174 --> 01:22:16,653
episode was?

2275
01:22:18,487 --> 01:22:18,726
Yeah.

2276
01:22:21,373 --> 01:22:23,609
Yeah. How... It was it was powerful. I

2277
01:22:23,609 --> 01:22:25,226
would imagine people who actually

2278
01:22:25,685 --> 01:22:27,063
live through racism

2279
01:22:27,600 --> 01:22:29,117
how may have a different take or may

2280
01:22:29,117 --> 01:22:30,155
have spotted the signs.

2281
01:22:30,649 --> 01:22:32,883
Much quicker than we did, but... Yeah. Yeah.

2282
01:22:33,122 --> 01:22:34,479
Yeah. I was still... It was a good

2283
01:22:34,479 --> 01:22:35,595
episode and then it was jarring, and I

2284
01:22:35,595 --> 01:22:37,830
was like holy shit. I thought we were

2285
01:22:37,830 --> 01:22:39,993
here to have a little space of insurance

2286
01:22:39,993 --> 01:22:42,937
save people. Yeah. Okay. We did something different

2287
01:22:42,937 --> 01:22:44,688
to this time. Very different. And, I mean,

2288
01:22:44,926 --> 01:22:46,938
it's stuck with me since we watched it

2289
01:22:47,328 --> 01:22:48,523
And I do count it as 1 of

2290
01:22:48,523 --> 01:22:50,274
the top episodes for this season so far.

2291
01:22:51,150 --> 01:22:53,539
I mean, which isn't hard to do considering

2292
01:22:53,539 --> 01:22:55,744
the first 2 were won't won't

2293
01:22:56,341 --> 01:22:57,453
so disappointing.

2294
01:22:58,247 --> 01:22:59,996
I'm not going back into that rant. I'm

2295
01:22:59,996 --> 01:23:02,062
sure Saturday night, somebody will get me into

2296
01:23:02,062 --> 01:23:03,904
that rant because f day we need to

2297
01:23:03,904 --> 01:23:06,289
watch the next episode 1. Of doctor. Say

2298
01:23:06,368 --> 01:23:08,673
There you go. So on that note, Mh.

2299
01:23:08,991 --> 01:23:10,899
You wanna go watch sweet tooth because this

2300
01:23:10,899 --> 01:23:12,011
new season just came out. Yeah.

2301
01:23:12,742 --> 01:23:15,525
Or no That until tomorrow. Maybe tomorrow. I

2302
01:23:15,525 --> 01:23:16,320
don't remember.

2303
01:23:17,434 --> 01:23:19,262
Yeah. Maybe Thursday or Friday, I think it...

2304
01:23:19,581 --> 01:23:21,728
Date order numbers. That's not my job. It'll

2305
01:23:21,728 --> 01:23:22,046
be there.

2306
01:23:24,300 --> 01:23:25,420
But now we can need to go have

2307
01:23:25,420 --> 01:23:27,179
the debate about, can we have the cert?

2308
01:23:27,979 --> 01:23:28,539
Set upright.

2309
01:23:29,819 --> 01:23:31,635
That that's the real. Yeah,

2310
01:23:32,314 --> 01:23:33,992
decision trying to made around here. I know.

2311
01:23:36,628 --> 01:23:38,546
Okay. We're gonna go. I gotta go time

2312
01:23:38,546 --> 01:23:39,905
stamps in. I... We had stuff to him.

2313
01:23:40,304 --> 01:23:42,238
Yeah thanks for being here, especially to the

2314
01:23:42,238 --> 01:23:44,315
bitter end. Hopefully, we'll see you again on

2315
01:23:44,315 --> 01:23:46,952
saturday. Join us and. And then come hang

2316
01:23:46,952 --> 01:23:50,161
with us saturday podcast folks. If you don't

2317
01:23:50,161 --> 01:23:51,198
normally get to do it and near free

2318
01:23:51,357 --> 01:23:53,032
Saturday night. I know for some people it's

2319
01:23:53,032 --> 01:23:54,627
difficult because this is pride month and there's

2320
01:23:54,627 --> 01:23:55,984
lots of events going on and it's the

2321
01:23:55,984 --> 01:23:57,738
weekend and there's kin events and it's the

2322
01:23:57,738 --> 01:23:59,587
week. Like I get it. We will miss

2323
01:23:59,587 --> 01:24:01,183
you. But if you can, you got time.

2324
01:24:02,619 --> 01:24:04,055
I don't think it I don't think it

2325
01:24:04,055 --> 01:24:05,092
was Mo, Ken.

2326
01:24:07,181 --> 01:24:09,415
The live in live chat kim asked curious

2327
01:24:09,415 --> 01:24:11,011
as to whether or not the most recent

2328
01:24:11,011 --> 01:24:12,765
was written by Steven Mo. I don't know.

2329
01:24:13,005 --> 01:24:14,140
I I don't think it was.

2330
01:24:15,500 --> 01:24:16,539
Any anyhow. Mh.

2331
01:24:17,500 --> 01:24:18,960
We're gonna go back. Go

2332
01:24:19,739 --> 01:24:21,500
Thanks Thanks for being here. Yep. All that.

2333
01:24:21,739 --> 01:24:23,194
Yeah We love you. Bye.