1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:00,740 Smarties, 2 00:00:01,280 --> 00:00:03,459 Steph and I are ridiculously 3 00:00:04,240 --> 00:00:07,279 excited for you to hear this episode. This 4 00:00:07,279 --> 00:00:10,894 episode is a master class with executive functioning 5 00:00:11,035 --> 00:00:14,554 expert, Mary d Sklar. Mary d is the 6 00:00:14,554 --> 00:00:15,054 founder 7 00:00:15,674 --> 00:00:17,940 of the see my Time program. You can 8 00:00:17,940 --> 00:00:20,260 learn more about it in this episode and 9 00:00:20,260 --> 00:00:22,359 also by going to her website, www.executiveflexdingsuccess 10 00:00:24,855 --> 00:00:27,574 dotcom. There are so many goodies in this 11 00:00:27,574 --> 00:00:30,614 episode that it actually became impossible for us 12 00:00:30,614 --> 00:00:32,475 to write an appropriate 13 00:00:32,934 --> 00:00:35,670 introduction to these next few episodes. Of course, 14 00:00:35,670 --> 00:00:37,989 we plan to just do 1 episode. We've 15 00:00:37,989 --> 00:00:39,530 now split this conversation 16 00:00:39,909 --> 00:00:41,909 into 2 episodes, so you'll hear the first 17 00:00:41,909 --> 00:00:44,284 part this week and the next part next 18 00:00:44,284 --> 00:00:45,984 week in episode 323. 19 00:00:46,445 --> 00:00:48,045 I don't wanna waste any more time, but 20 00:00:48,045 --> 00:00:50,340 I do wanna let you know that we 21 00:00:50,500 --> 00:00:53,159 did do a Patreon extended conversation 22 00:00:53,619 --> 00:00:56,260 with Mary d. We will be releasing that 23 00:00:56,260 --> 00:00:56,760 episode 24 00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:58,280 next week 25 00:00:58,615 --> 00:01:00,854 because you really do need to listen to 26 00:01:00,854 --> 00:01:03,674 the entire conversation before listening to that Patreon. 27 00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:06,234 If you want to hear that extended conversation, 28 00:01:06,670 --> 00:01:08,689 believe me, you do, go ahead 29 00:01:09,469 --> 00:01:12,109 and make sure you are a $5 a 30 00:01:12,109 --> 00:01:13,329 month monthly subscriber. 31 00:01:13,709 --> 00:01:16,265 Obviously, that $5 a month goes to support 32 00:01:16,265 --> 00:01:18,104 the podcast and the work that we're doing 33 00:01:18,104 --> 00:01:20,984 here, and we thank you through these extended 34 00:01:20,984 --> 00:01:23,144 conversations. You can go back as long as 35 00:01:23,144 --> 00:01:25,899 you want. They're all there and other things 36 00:01:25,899 --> 00:01:27,819 that we throw up there for you guys 37 00:01:27,819 --> 00:01:30,379 as well. Again, to become a patron and 38 00:01:30,379 --> 00:01:32,479 listen to our Patreon, go to www. 39 00:01:33,325 --> 00:01:33,825 Patreon.com/learn 40 00:01:34,924 --> 00:01:35,424 smarterpodcast. 41 00:01:35,965 --> 00:01:38,605 And that extended conversation with Mary d will 42 00:01:38,605 --> 00:01:41,930 be live next week. Let's dig in. You 43 00:01:41,930 --> 00:01:43,469 want to learn faster, 44 00:01:44,010 --> 00:01:46,189 but sometimes working harder 45 00:01:46,969 --> 00:01:49,784 is just not the answer. You have to 46 00:01:49,784 --> 00:01:50,284 learn 47 00:01:50,905 --> 00:01:51,405 smarter, 48 00:01:51,864 --> 00:01:53,405 the educational therapy podcast. 49 00:01:56,030 --> 00:01:58,129 Hi, smarties. Welcome to episode 322 50 00:01:58,829 --> 00:02:01,790 of learn smarter, the educational therapy podcast. I'm 51 00:02:01,790 --> 00:02:04,965 Stephanie Pitts. And I'm Rachel Capp. And today 52 00:02:05,025 --> 00:02:05,765 we are 53 00:02:06,225 --> 00:02:06,725 thrilled 54 00:02:07,265 --> 00:02:07,844 to have 55 00:02:08,224 --> 00:02:08,724 executive 56 00:02:09,425 --> 00:02:09,925 functioning 57 00:02:10,544 --> 00:02:11,044 expert, 58 00:02:11,905 --> 00:02:14,219 Mary d Sklar with us. Hi, Mary d. 59 00:02:15,080 --> 00:02:17,639 Hi. Thanks for coming on. This is very 60 00:02:17,639 --> 00:02:19,819 exciting to have you. A treat 61 00:02:20,120 --> 00:02:22,224 for us. Well, it's a treat for me 62 00:02:22,224 --> 00:02:24,625 because educational therapists will help get me get 63 00:02:24,625 --> 00:02:26,944 started. Okay? I saw the value in my 64 00:02:26,944 --> 00:02:28,889 work when before I even had it published. 65 00:02:28,969 --> 00:02:30,409 So I have a soft spot in my 66 00:02:30,409 --> 00:02:31,949 heart for educational therapists. 67 00:02:33,050 --> 00:02:35,849 Well, we both have used your work and 68 00:02:35,849 --> 00:02:37,770 your resources over the years, so we're just 69 00:02:37,770 --> 00:02:40,215 thrilled to have the opportunity to chat with 70 00:02:40,215 --> 00:02:40,875 you. But 71 00:02:41,335 --> 00:02:43,655 why don't you take a second and introduce 72 00:02:43,655 --> 00:02:45,735 yourself to our audience? Explain a little bit 73 00:02:45,735 --> 00:02:47,330 about who you are and what you do. 74 00:02:47,490 --> 00:02:49,409 I am primarily an educator. That was my 75 00:02:49,409 --> 00:02:49,909 background. 76 00:02:50,370 --> 00:02:52,629 I was a classroom teacher in a galaxy 77 00:02:52,770 --> 00:02:55,590 far, far away. That's how I describe myself, 78 00:02:56,525 --> 00:02:59,905 But I became very interested in executive functioning 79 00:03:01,245 --> 00:03:02,944 a long time ago, 80 00:03:03,485 --> 00:03:06,680 really before we even had the term, because 81 00:03:06,680 --> 00:03:09,159 I have a brain that has executive functioning 82 00:03:09,159 --> 00:03:09,659 challenges, 83 00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:13,420 and I did not understand that about myself 84 00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:14,540 and 85 00:03:15,254 --> 00:03:16,074 speech pathologist. 86 00:03:16,534 --> 00:03:17,594 I was running a program 87 00:03:18,615 --> 00:03:21,514 at a local elementary school to teach volunteers 88 00:03:21,574 --> 00:03:23,189 to teach at risk kids how to read. 89 00:03:23,669 --> 00:03:26,409 And I ended up, because of speech pathologist 90 00:03:26,469 --> 00:03:29,030 on campus, taking some training with doctor Ellen 91 00:03:29,030 --> 00:03:30,710 Arber at the University of Portland, who was 92 00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:31,770 also a speech pathologist. 93 00:03:32,365 --> 00:03:34,705 And at the time, that was 1994. 94 00:03:35,245 --> 00:03:36,705 She had a very interesting 95 00:03:37,085 --> 00:03:39,104 concept. She felt that 96 00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:40,300 our behavior 97 00:03:40,599 --> 00:03:42,760 was directly tied to the way our brains 98 00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:43,580 are wired. 99 00:03:43,960 --> 00:03:45,560 But what you guys most of the audience 100 00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:47,319 in the room are too young to understand. 101 00:03:47,319 --> 00:03:48,860 I'll be 71 soon. 102 00:03:49,625 --> 00:03:51,004 That was woo woo 103 00:03:52,424 --> 00:03:54,745 in 94. Okay. Literally it was woo woo. 104 00:03:54,745 --> 00:03:56,584 We didn't have the brain scans. We didn't 105 00:03:56,584 --> 00:03:59,004 understand the brain, anything like we do today. 106 00:03:59,560 --> 00:04:02,680 In fact, her accrediting organization, ASHA, they wanted 107 00:04:02,680 --> 00:04:04,199 to kick her out because she wasn't, you 108 00:04:04,199 --> 00:04:05,560 know, I was like, you're going into a 109 00:04:05,560 --> 00:04:07,240 sphere that has nothing to do with speaking 110 00:04:07,240 --> 00:04:08,205 language. Okay. 111 00:04:08,504 --> 00:04:10,044 But Ellen just have to be brilliant. 112 00:04:10,425 --> 00:04:12,685 Okay? And she was putting together 113 00:04:13,944 --> 00:04:15,485 the brain and behavior differences. 114 00:04:15,900 --> 00:04:18,060 I know this from hindsight. She was really 115 00:04:18,060 --> 00:04:18,560 focusing 116 00:04:18,939 --> 00:04:20,860 on a lot of the the students we 117 00:04:20,860 --> 00:04:22,240 now would call neurodivergent. 118 00:04:23,259 --> 00:04:24,720 We used to say, spectrum 119 00:04:25,314 --> 00:04:28,035 folks. Okay? That was really who was really 120 00:04:28,035 --> 00:04:28,935 intriguing her 121 00:04:29,395 --> 00:04:31,395 at the time, but we didn't have names 122 00:04:31,395 --> 00:04:33,795 for those either. Okay? We just didn't have 123 00:04:33,795 --> 00:04:34,855 terms to 124 00:04:35,300 --> 00:04:37,939 to describe people. Anyway, so I got into 125 00:04:37,939 --> 00:04:40,339 that. She helped me start to understand my 126 00:04:40,339 --> 00:04:43,300 own brain and the connection, which was marvelous 127 00:04:43,300 --> 00:04:44,785 because it took away the guilt and the 128 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:46,485 shame that I had for years. 129 00:04:46,944 --> 00:04:49,425 I described myself for over 40 years as 130 00:04:49,425 --> 00:04:50,165 an underachieving 131 00:04:50,705 --> 00:04:51,205 procrastinator, 132 00:04:52,460 --> 00:04:55,339 which is a terrible moniker to hang around 133 00:04:55,339 --> 00:04:57,180 your neck. I was always late. I would 134 00:04:57,180 --> 00:04:58,220 scream at the kids that came out the 135 00:04:58,220 --> 00:04:59,660 door in the morning. My house is welcome 136 00:04:59,660 --> 00:05:01,595 to your pile. So I would show up 137 00:05:01,595 --> 00:05:03,454 on the wrong day at the wrong time. 138 00:05:03,834 --> 00:05:06,314 I've been successful in my life, but I 139 00:05:06,314 --> 00:05:08,555 always felt like everything was gonna come crashing 140 00:05:08,555 --> 00:05:10,735 down. You know? There was no sense of 141 00:05:10,849 --> 00:05:13,649 of centeredness or self esteem connected to what 142 00:05:13,649 --> 00:05:15,029 I was doing in the world. 143 00:05:15,410 --> 00:05:17,250 So I got into it because of my 144 00:05:17,250 --> 00:05:19,269 own brain, and then my son had challenges. 145 00:05:20,785 --> 00:05:23,185 And Ellen helped me think about time very 146 00:05:23,185 --> 00:05:23,685 differently. 147 00:05:24,144 --> 00:05:25,044 She told me, 148 00:05:25,584 --> 00:05:27,264 after spending a whole week with her and 149 00:05:27,264 --> 00:05:29,209 one of the seminar things, I had gone 150 00:05:29,209 --> 00:05:30,810 up to her and I said, Ellen, I 151 00:05:30,810 --> 00:05:32,329 came here to teach kids how to learn 152 00:05:32,329 --> 00:05:34,089 to read. That's what I was looking for. 153 00:05:34,089 --> 00:05:36,435 It was information about brain and reading. Right. 154 00:05:36,675 --> 00:05:38,595 And I said, but you've given me this 155 00:05:38,595 --> 00:05:41,074 glamour of insight into my own behavior connected 156 00:05:41,074 --> 00:05:43,794 to time. I'll pay you anything. You know, 157 00:05:43,794 --> 00:05:44,535 just anything. 158 00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:45,620 And, 159 00:05:46,079 --> 00:05:48,240 so she had me draw, she said, oh, 160 00:05:48,240 --> 00:05:50,240 I've confused you enough for this week. I 161 00:05:50,240 --> 00:05:50,740 will, 162 00:05:51,120 --> 00:05:52,884 give you a free hour. But what I 163 00:05:52,884 --> 00:05:54,524 want you to do is to bring with 164 00:05:54,524 --> 00:05:55,024 you 165 00:05:55,324 --> 00:05:57,105 a drawing of a picture 166 00:05:57,564 --> 00:05:59,504 of what you need to do in that 167 00:05:59,564 --> 00:06:02,045 following 7 days. Basically, a plan for your 168 00:06:02,045 --> 00:06:04,990 week. K. And so I drew this picture, 169 00:06:04,990 --> 00:06:07,229 which, since this is all audio, I'm just 170 00:06:07,229 --> 00:06:09,229 gonna have to describe it to you. I 171 00:06:09,229 --> 00:06:11,410 drew this picture that took me 2 hours 172 00:06:11,550 --> 00:06:14,335 to draw, and it looks like total chaos. 173 00:06:14,335 --> 00:06:15,774 It's just like you know, it's got some 174 00:06:15,774 --> 00:06:17,295 images in it, but it's lots of words 175 00:06:17,295 --> 00:06:18,995 and it's I mean, it's just a mess. 176 00:06:19,295 --> 00:06:20,975 And Ellen took one look at it, and 177 00:06:20,975 --> 00:06:22,274 she said, oh, dear. 178 00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:25,680 Yeah. Oh, dear. It's what your brain felt 179 00:06:25,680 --> 00:06:28,560 like. That's exactly I show that picture all 180 00:06:28,560 --> 00:06:30,560 the time to people. Yes. And they just 181 00:06:30,560 --> 00:06:32,625 nod their heads going, yeah. Yeah. That's my 182 00:06:32,625 --> 00:06:35,425 brain. It's relatable. That's what that's happens to 183 00:06:35,425 --> 00:06:37,665 me. So she had given me this advice 184 00:06:37,665 --> 00:06:39,365 at the end of an hour. We refined 185 00:06:39,425 --> 00:06:41,585 what it took to, draw a picture for 186 00:06:41,585 --> 00:06:42,160 the week 187 00:06:42,639 --> 00:06:44,660 rather than have it be chaos 188 00:06:45,519 --> 00:06:47,279 and take me 2 hours. But at the 189 00:06:47,279 --> 00:06:48,580 end of the hour, I said, Ellen, 190 00:06:48,959 --> 00:06:51,214 wait a minute. There's way more to my 191 00:06:51,214 --> 00:06:52,675 problem than drawing a picture. 192 00:06:53,214 --> 00:06:55,935 I read every time management book, planning book, 193 00:06:55,935 --> 00:06:58,660 calendar system, you name it. I was brought 194 00:06:58,660 --> 00:07:00,339 home a book from the library, the time 195 00:07:00,339 --> 00:07:01,939 on the spine. I came home and my 196 00:07:01,939 --> 00:07:03,699 husband looked at it and he goes, honey, 197 00:07:03,699 --> 00:07:05,060 why did you bring this home? I said, 198 00:07:05,139 --> 00:07:06,740 it's about time. And he goes, honey, it 199 00:07:06,740 --> 00:07:08,355 has to do with, like, you know, physics, 200 00:07:08,355 --> 00:07:10,295 you know, like deep space physics. 201 00:07:11,795 --> 00:07:14,115 And I said, really? I mean, I'm I 202 00:07:14,115 --> 00:07:16,274 hadn't read the subs subtitle. I just grabbed 203 00:07:16,274 --> 00:07:18,019 it because it's had time on it. Okay. 204 00:07:18,259 --> 00:07:21,220 Sounds familiar. Yeah. Yeah. And so she said, 205 00:07:21,220 --> 00:07:22,979 gave me this advice, and I want everybody, 206 00:07:22,979 --> 00:07:24,819 you included and all the people in the 207 00:07:24,819 --> 00:07:26,979 audience to wrap your lovely minds around this. 208 00:07:26,979 --> 00:07:28,884 This is her advice. She whips out her 209 00:07:28,884 --> 00:07:30,404 finger. That's kinda who Ellen is. She's a 210 00:07:30,404 --> 00:07:31,145 brilliant woman. 211 00:07:31,524 --> 00:07:33,444 But she kinda boom in her face boom. 212 00:07:33,444 --> 00:07:34,964 She goes out her finger. She goes, go 213 00:07:34,964 --> 00:07:35,464 home. 214 00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:37,500 Take care of yourself 215 00:07:37,879 --> 00:07:38,699 in time 216 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:41,259 and space, and come back and see me. 217 00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:42,300 Got that? 218 00:07:43,704 --> 00:07:45,625 Cool. Take yourself in time and space, and 219 00:07:45,625 --> 00:07:46,365 we'll talk. 220 00:07:46,745 --> 00:07:48,504 And so I felt like I'd gone to 221 00:07:48,504 --> 00:07:50,584 see the guru, and I got a Buddhist 222 00:07:50,584 --> 00:07:51,810 conundrum. You know? 223 00:07:53,009 --> 00:07:55,730 How do I what does that mean? And 224 00:07:55,730 --> 00:07:56,389 it was you 225 00:07:56,769 --> 00:07:58,610 know, time and space, time and space, time 226 00:07:58,610 --> 00:08:00,735 and space over and over again because I 227 00:08:00,735 --> 00:08:02,814 forget things that people said to me pretty 228 00:08:02,814 --> 00:08:04,574 fast. And then my car was a long 229 00:08:04,574 --> 00:08:07,370 way from her office when I parked. Yeah. 230 00:08:07,370 --> 00:08:09,129 So you're just repeating it to yourself. This 231 00:08:09,129 --> 00:08:10,730 is the day you put cell phones. You 232 00:08:10,730 --> 00:08:12,810 know? Put it together enough to write it 233 00:08:12,810 --> 00:08:14,569 down. Right? You know? It's just like it 234 00:08:14,569 --> 00:08:16,394 was time and space time and space. And 235 00:08:16,394 --> 00:08:17,754 even if you had written it down, you 236 00:08:17,754 --> 00:08:19,675 would have lost the paper anyway. So, like, 237 00:08:19,675 --> 00:08:20,334 you could. 238 00:08:21,035 --> 00:08:22,475 It would never have made the half a 239 00:08:22,475 --> 00:08:24,714 mile to the car. Yeah. So time and 240 00:08:24,714 --> 00:08:25,935 space, time and space. 241 00:08:26,289 --> 00:08:27,970 It took me a year to figure it 242 00:08:27,970 --> 00:08:28,470 out. 243 00:08:29,250 --> 00:08:30,689 She gave me the clues of time and 244 00:08:30,689 --> 00:08:32,129 space, and she gave me the clues that 245 00:08:32,129 --> 00:08:33,750 it was all connected to my brain 246 00:08:34,434 --> 00:08:35,575 And that my brain 247 00:08:36,115 --> 00:08:38,355 her theory back then I don't know how 248 00:08:38,514 --> 00:08:39,875 I haven't worked with her for quite a 249 00:08:39,875 --> 00:08:40,695 number of years. 250 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:44,100 She described me as having a visual language 251 00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:44,740 system. 252 00:08:45,199 --> 00:08:45,699 Okay? 253 00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:48,740 Not visual learner. It's a different thing. Okay? 254 00:08:48,825 --> 00:08:51,644 It's more how you hold your interior language. 255 00:08:52,264 --> 00:08:55,164 And so I don't store things auditorially 256 00:08:55,625 --> 00:08:57,800 well at all. I just don't. If you 257 00:08:57,800 --> 00:08:59,399 do if you have a sound brain or 258 00:08:59,399 --> 00:09:01,240 a picture brain, as I would describe it 259 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:03,160 in my program, I am so far on 260 00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:04,840 the picture side, I have no sound. It's 261 00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:05,660 like I can't 262 00:09:06,134 --> 00:09:07,735 sing any songs. I don't know the words 263 00:09:07,735 --> 00:09:09,495 to songs. If you start singing next to 264 00:09:09,495 --> 00:09:10,955 me, I can match pitches, 265 00:09:11,335 --> 00:09:13,659 but I can't sing any of the Beatles 266 00:09:13,659 --> 00:09:15,259 songs or the Beach Boys songs that I 267 00:09:15,259 --> 00:09:16,319 listen to. Interesting. 268 00:09:16,779 --> 00:09:18,559 I can't remember them. Okay. 269 00:09:18,940 --> 00:09:20,779 The only songs I remember are some Girl 270 00:09:20,779 --> 00:09:22,985 Scout songs that I sang over and over 271 00:09:22,985 --> 00:09:25,144 and over and over and over again. At 272 00:09:25,144 --> 00:09:27,225 an early age. Uh-huh. Very early age. Other 273 00:09:27,225 --> 00:09:29,085 than that, nothing sticks. Okay. 274 00:09:29,419 --> 00:09:31,740 So, anyway, time and space got it figured 275 00:09:31,740 --> 00:09:34,000 out. And then my son had issues. 276 00:09:34,539 --> 00:09:36,940 His teacher 4th grader's teacher said he's being 277 00:09:36,940 --> 00:09:38,804 a complete flake, not turning anything 278 00:09:39,184 --> 00:09:40,884 in. Bright kid. No production. 279 00:09:41,825 --> 00:09:44,245 So he and I worked on paper management 280 00:09:44,705 --> 00:09:45,205 because, 281 00:09:45,690 --> 00:09:47,470 my son was one of those kids who 282 00:09:48,169 --> 00:09:49,929 was walking around a black hole. It's like 283 00:09:49,929 --> 00:09:52,009 he lost everything. You know? It didn't matter 284 00:09:52,009 --> 00:09:54,304 what it was, jackets, shoes, books. He couldn't 285 00:09:54,304 --> 00:09:55,504 hold on to a piece of paper from 286 00:09:55,504 --> 00:09:57,345 his desk to the teacher's desk. You know? 287 00:09:57,345 --> 00:09:58,485 It was not impossible. 288 00:09:59,105 --> 00:10:00,865 And so I worked on it from the 289 00:10:00,865 --> 00:10:03,024 point of view of what his brain needed 290 00:10:03,024 --> 00:10:03,764 to see. 291 00:10:05,009 --> 00:10:05,509 Okay? 292 00:10:05,889 --> 00:10:07,289 And put together a little system. And after 293 00:10:07,289 --> 00:10:08,769 a few weeks, I said, Josh, is this 294 00:10:08,769 --> 00:10:09,750 helping you any? 295 00:10:10,129 --> 00:10:13,095 And he paused. He was a very thoughtful 296 00:10:13,095 --> 00:10:15,752 little 4th grade kid. Now he's a very 297 00:10:15,752 --> 00:10:18,409 thoughtful 39 year old. Mhmm. He he said, 298 00:10:18,409 --> 00:10:20,710 yeah. I'm not so stressful. I'm not getting 299 00:10:20,710 --> 00:10:22,710 trouble for not turning on my work. You 300 00:10:22,710 --> 00:10:25,669 know? And, so then I ended up starting 301 00:10:25,669 --> 00:10:27,910 to work with my friends' kids where they're 302 00:10:27,910 --> 00:10:29,289 all hitting middle school, 303 00:10:29,725 --> 00:10:31,184 and, they've been 304 00:10:31,565 --> 00:10:34,044 reasonably successful in elementary school, most of them, 305 00:10:34,044 --> 00:10:35,884 because the elementary school teachers give a lot 306 00:10:35,884 --> 00:10:38,519 of support. Yep. And you have one teacher? 307 00:10:38,659 --> 00:10:40,759 One teacher, one system to understand. 308 00:10:41,860 --> 00:10:43,620 And when they hit middle school, boom, you 309 00:10:43,620 --> 00:10:45,764 know, the wheels fell. Yep. So that's who 310 00:10:45,764 --> 00:10:47,704 I thought I was gonna work with, 311 00:10:48,164 --> 00:10:48,664 and 312 00:10:49,125 --> 00:10:52,024 people just started showing up on my doorstep, 313 00:10:52,325 --> 00:10:52,825 literally. 314 00:10:53,209 --> 00:10:56,089 It was all word-of-mouth. I never advertised for 315 00:10:56,089 --> 00:10:59,870 15 years. I had a private practice of 316 00:11:00,089 --> 00:11:02,674 working with, I was a dyslexia specialist working 317 00:11:02,674 --> 00:11:03,335 with dyslexia, 318 00:11:03,955 --> 00:11:05,174 making math real, 319 00:11:05,554 --> 00:11:07,554 and, other language stuff I had learned from 320 00:11:07,554 --> 00:11:09,875 Ellen, help supporting written language. So I was 321 00:11:09,875 --> 00:11:12,449 being net doing that after school. But these 322 00:11:12,449 --> 00:11:13,669 kids and these families, 323 00:11:14,289 --> 00:11:17,350 started showing up who were getting things done. 324 00:11:17,409 --> 00:11:19,269 And back then, we called it 325 00:11:20,044 --> 00:11:21,565 poor study skills. I mean, that was the 326 00:11:21,565 --> 00:11:23,325 only that was the only phrase that they 327 00:11:23,325 --> 00:11:25,264 kind of onto that behavior. 328 00:11:26,044 --> 00:11:28,870 So these people showed up, these kids. Initially, 329 00:11:28,870 --> 00:11:30,730 I just showed worked with the kids. 330 00:11:31,590 --> 00:11:34,009 But then I went and heard a behavioral, 331 00:11:34,470 --> 00:11:35,769 pediatrician speak, 332 00:11:36,335 --> 00:11:38,915 and he talked about the brain and adolescent 333 00:11:39,055 --> 00:11:39,555 behavior. 334 00:11:40,014 --> 00:11:42,014 And that was my first, like, brain piece 335 00:11:42,014 --> 00:11:43,555 of it. I'm like, oh, 336 00:11:45,279 --> 00:11:47,679 that's why the kids have it sitting in 337 00:11:47,679 --> 00:11:49,919 my room with me because they look like 338 00:11:49,919 --> 00:11:51,919 they've got it right. But when they go 339 00:11:51,919 --> 00:11:54,934 home, they don't transfer it. Right. Until it 340 00:11:54,934 --> 00:11:57,654 all falls apart. So at that juncture, I 341 00:11:57,654 --> 00:11:59,495 made a decision, which I've stuck to all 342 00:11:59,495 --> 00:12:01,735 these years, is I never work with kids 343 00:12:01,735 --> 00:12:04,440 by themselves if they are living at home. 344 00:12:05,399 --> 00:12:07,639 I won't do it. K. 1 or more 345 00:12:07,639 --> 00:12:09,399 parents have to come there. They have to 346 00:12:09,399 --> 00:12:10,379 be part of the picture. 347 00:12:10,840 --> 00:12:13,179 Because from a developmental perspective, 348 00:12:13,684 --> 00:12:16,325 those brains you can teach teach in quotation 349 00:12:16,325 --> 00:12:18,004 marks. You can talk to them all you 350 00:12:18,004 --> 00:12:19,144 want about strategies, 351 00:12:19,845 --> 00:12:21,865 but their brains, because of development, 352 00:12:22,245 --> 00:12:24,970 it's not gonna stick. You know? It's a 353 00:12:25,190 --> 00:12:28,950 long term process, these executive functioning skills. And 354 00:12:28,950 --> 00:12:30,410 so these brains need 355 00:12:30,995 --> 00:12:33,714 support for all the transition points when things 356 00:12:33,714 --> 00:12:34,214 change. 357 00:12:34,514 --> 00:12:35,875 When they go from middle school to high 358 00:12:35,875 --> 00:12:38,214 school, high school to college, college to work, 359 00:12:38,389 --> 00:12:40,549 if somebody's not there helping them to scaffold 360 00:12:40,549 --> 00:12:41,289 that transition, 361 00:12:41,750 --> 00:12:43,370 their brains do not necessarily 362 00:12:43,909 --> 00:12:44,409 transfer 363 00:12:44,870 --> 00:12:47,845 the strategies that worked in situation a to 364 00:12:47,845 --> 00:12:49,065 the new situation 365 00:12:49,445 --> 00:12:52,325 b. It's very interesting. Some pulled off, other 366 00:12:52,325 --> 00:12:55,125 ones really, really can't. Okay. So you have 367 00:12:55,125 --> 00:12:56,745 to have parents involved because parents 368 00:12:57,379 --> 00:12:59,779 don't even realize that they need to be 369 00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:01,539 that kind of support, and the apple isn't 370 00:13:01,539 --> 00:13:03,539 far far from the tree. Mhmm. Have you 371 00:13:03,539 --> 00:13:05,320 listened to our podcast before? 372 00:13:07,284 --> 00:13:09,605 And, you know, so the parents come and 373 00:13:09,684 --> 00:13:12,904 so, anyway, for 15 years, people showed up. 374 00:13:13,445 --> 00:13:15,649 And I created the program that I now 375 00:13:15,730 --> 00:13:17,830 teach, which is called seeing my time. 376 00:13:18,529 --> 00:13:20,950 And now how do I teach these people? 377 00:13:21,170 --> 00:13:23,110 What do I understand about time and space? 378 00:13:23,924 --> 00:13:26,745 Because you see, my approach to executive functioning 379 00:13:26,884 --> 00:13:29,684 is somewhat unique, unless people have been exposed 380 00:13:29,684 --> 00:13:31,924 to some of my work. Okay? Right. It's 381 00:13:31,924 --> 00:13:33,269 that I'm an 382 00:13:33,730 --> 00:13:35,509 educator. I'm a reading specialist. 383 00:13:36,129 --> 00:13:37,750 I know how to teach 384 00:13:38,129 --> 00:13:39,509 in a very carefully 385 00:13:39,970 --> 00:13:42,310 scaffolded step by step program 386 00:13:43,075 --> 00:13:44,934 so that learning happens. 387 00:13:45,315 --> 00:13:46,855 It's hands on, multisensory 388 00:13:47,554 --> 00:13:49,335 so that learning happens. 389 00:13:50,090 --> 00:13:51,389 You know? And most 390 00:13:52,170 --> 00:13:53,629 people miss that. 391 00:13:54,170 --> 00:13:56,410 Okay? They don't get it. It was like 392 00:13:56,410 --> 00:13:58,330 a couple years ago, I was a keynote 393 00:13:58,330 --> 00:14:01,215 speaker at an event for a private school 394 00:14:01,274 --> 00:14:01,774 consortium. 395 00:14:02,154 --> 00:14:03,835 And a couple of teachers, bless their hearts, 396 00:14:03,835 --> 00:14:05,915 were talking about executive functioning. And I thought, 397 00:14:05,915 --> 00:14:08,000 I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. Because if 398 00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:08,899 they had got it, 399 00:14:09,259 --> 00:14:09,759 I 400 00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:10,620 can 401 00:14:10,980 --> 00:14:11,480 retire. 402 00:14:11,839 --> 00:14:13,440 I could be done. You know? Yeah. And 403 00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:14,879 I sat there listening to them, and I 404 00:14:14,879 --> 00:14:16,634 just put my head in my hands, and 405 00:14:16,634 --> 00:14:18,475 I'm like, oh, I don't have it. You're 406 00:14:18,475 --> 00:14:21,294 you're like, you can't retire. Sure. Just kidding. 407 00:14:22,750 --> 00:14:24,690 They're doing the same old stuff wrong. 408 00:14:25,389 --> 00:14:28,050 I can't quit. Okay? So I'm still working. 409 00:14:28,110 --> 00:14:29,570 We're still educating teachers. 410 00:14:30,054 --> 00:14:31,654 But so I got into it that way. 411 00:14:31,654 --> 00:14:32,634 That was my history. 412 00:14:33,174 --> 00:14:34,954 And to my utter surprise, 413 00:14:35,254 --> 00:14:37,034 here I am today. It was a therapist 414 00:14:37,495 --> 00:14:38,554 and speech pathologist 415 00:14:39,250 --> 00:14:40,769 who knew my work, who were sending me 416 00:14:40,769 --> 00:14:43,009 people, neuropsych sent all kinds of people sent 417 00:14:43,009 --> 00:14:44,930 me people, and they all wanted me to 418 00:14:44,930 --> 00:14:47,125 publish the work. And I was like, who'd 419 00:14:47,125 --> 00:14:49,605 buy it? All of them. Was like, who 420 00:14:49,605 --> 00:14:51,524 made this around my dining room table? You 421 00:14:51,524 --> 00:14:53,524 know, I'm not a PhD person from some 422 00:14:53,524 --> 00:14:54,665 university. You know? 423 00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:57,000 But I was really doing research, and I 424 00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,659 was applying what I understood from a learning 425 00:14:59,720 --> 00:15:00,220 perspective. 426 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:02,804 And I'm also a learner. 427 00:15:03,264 --> 00:15:06,465 I'm always learning. Okay. So I turn over 428 00:15:06,465 --> 00:15:09,184 every rock possible to expand my personal knowledge 429 00:15:09,184 --> 00:15:09,845 and spent 430 00:15:10,269 --> 00:15:11,790 a lot of years and a lot of 431 00:15:11,790 --> 00:15:14,430 money educating myself about the brain and executive 432 00:15:14,430 --> 00:15:16,110 functioning and all you know, I've hung out 433 00:15:16,110 --> 00:15:18,029 with all the big names and, you know, 434 00:15:18,029 --> 00:15:20,014 done training with them and everything else. 435 00:15:20,495 --> 00:15:22,654 And so what my brain is good at, 436 00:15:22,654 --> 00:15:24,835 it has executive functioning challenges, but 437 00:15:25,295 --> 00:15:27,855 it's a very creative brain, and it is 438 00:15:27,855 --> 00:15:30,000 a brain that synthesizes well. Yeah. It, like, 439 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:30,820 takes concepts 440 00:15:31,519 --> 00:15:33,139 from very different domains 441 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:35,680 and pulls them together, which I know is 442 00:15:35,680 --> 00:15:37,440 why saying my time is as successful as 443 00:15:37,440 --> 00:15:38,544 it is. Yeah. 444 00:15:38,845 --> 00:15:40,524 So yeah. So I just ended up here 445 00:15:40,524 --> 00:15:42,684 kind of by totally by accident. I didn't 446 00:15:42,684 --> 00:15:44,365 think I would ever be an entrepreneur of 447 00:15:44,365 --> 00:15:46,750 sorts. We train people now around the world 448 00:15:46,750 --> 00:15:48,509 teaching, say, my time. We have programs for 449 00:15:48,509 --> 00:15:50,669 educators. We have programs for parents. We do 450 00:15:50,669 --> 00:15:52,990 distance. We do local. We do groups. We 451 00:15:52,990 --> 00:15:54,049 do, planners. 452 00:15:54,665 --> 00:15:56,365 You know, all kinds of things that 453 00:15:56,825 --> 00:15:59,945 I never imagined happening, but all makes sense 454 00:15:59,945 --> 00:16:01,840 as I look back over the back. So 455 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:04,019 that's a quick dip into the whole thing, 456 00:16:04,320 --> 00:16:05,759 but I just I love my work, and 457 00:16:05,759 --> 00:16:07,860 I'm still doing it because I have satisfaction. 458 00:16:08,399 --> 00:16:11,300 And now I primarily work with adults myself 459 00:16:12,004 --> 00:16:13,684 because I don't have the energy to deal 460 00:16:13,684 --> 00:16:15,764 with teenagers and parents after 3 Yeah. In 461 00:16:15,764 --> 00:16:16,504 the afternoon. 462 00:16:17,605 --> 00:16:19,285 I just can't do it anymore. I put 463 00:16:19,285 --> 00:16:20,805 in my time. Now it's up to the 464 00:16:20,805 --> 00:16:21,480 rest of us. 465 00:16:21,959 --> 00:16:24,679 So I guess my first sort of question 466 00:16:24,679 --> 00:16:26,860 for you is, what do you wish 467 00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:29,339 people and that can be parents, 468 00:16:29,784 --> 00:16:32,044 teachers, a therapist, learning specialist, 469 00:16:32,504 --> 00:16:35,225 whoever you wanna make that people be. What 470 00:16:35,225 --> 00:16:36,524 do you wish people understood 471 00:16:36,985 --> 00:16:39,860 about time? Well, go back to the concept 472 00:16:39,860 --> 00:16:42,440 that Arvin said about time and space. 473 00:16:43,700 --> 00:16:44,919 People think 474 00:16:45,220 --> 00:16:46,360 time is stretchy. 475 00:16:47,075 --> 00:16:47,575 K? 476 00:16:47,955 --> 00:16:50,434 That sometimes it seems to go slow and 477 00:16:50,434 --> 00:16:52,355 sometimes it seems to go fast. You know, 478 00:16:52,355 --> 00:16:54,274 we've got all the circumstances where it slows 479 00:16:54,274 --> 00:16:56,370 down and it goes Yeah. Where did the 480 00:16:56,370 --> 00:16:58,850 time go? Boom. Gone. Yeah. It doesn't. It's 481 00:16:58,850 --> 00:16:59,589 just heartbeats. 482 00:17:00,209 --> 00:17:00,709 Okay. 483 00:17:01,250 --> 00:17:03,730 So time doesn't stretch, so you can do 484 00:17:03,730 --> 00:17:06,125 more, after dinner, I'll finish it. This weekend, 485 00:17:06,125 --> 00:17:07,904 I'll get it all done. You know? 486 00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:11,325 It's not gonna stretch for you. Everything takes 487 00:17:11,325 --> 00:17:13,265 a certain amount of heartbeats. 488 00:17:14,039 --> 00:17:16,440 K? You can't be, like, superficial. You can't 489 00:17:16,440 --> 00:17:17,900 multitask and make it all better. 490 00:17:18,279 --> 00:17:21,259 No. It's finite. It's very, very finite. 491 00:17:22,345 --> 00:17:24,184 And there are 3 truths of time in 492 00:17:24,184 --> 00:17:24,845 my program, 493 00:17:25,224 --> 00:17:27,085 seeing my time. And the third one is 494 00:17:27,224 --> 00:17:29,305 the way you use your time equals your 495 00:17:29,305 --> 00:17:32,029 life. Yep. Heavy. Right? Yeah. Wow. 496 00:17:32,490 --> 00:17:35,690 Okay. What it is, okay, is that our 497 00:17:35,690 --> 00:17:37,610 choices we make every day about how we 498 00:17:37,610 --> 00:17:38,590 use our time 499 00:17:38,965 --> 00:17:41,045 equals the total sum of our lives. You 500 00:17:41,045 --> 00:17:43,365 know? So knowing that time takes up space, 501 00:17:43,365 --> 00:17:45,225 that it is the most valuable, 502 00:17:45,684 --> 00:17:48,250 most valuable asset you have in your life, 503 00:17:48,410 --> 00:17:50,089 and you have no idea how much of 504 00:17:50,089 --> 00:17:52,670 it you've got. Yeah. K. We don't choose 505 00:17:52,809 --> 00:17:54,329 how much time we get to be here. 506 00:17:54,329 --> 00:17:54,829 K. 507 00:17:55,130 --> 00:17:56,809 So that would be my time thing is 508 00:17:56,809 --> 00:17:58,075 that people are unrealistic 509 00:17:58,934 --> 00:18:00,775 about what they can do in a given 510 00:18:00,775 --> 00:18:02,855 space of time. So you have to teach 511 00:18:02,855 --> 00:18:04,775 them how to figure out how long things 512 00:18:04,775 --> 00:18:05,640 take to do. 513 00:18:06,119 --> 00:18:07,500 But then the other component 514 00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:09,900 that was not in my mind 515 00:18:10,279 --> 00:18:12,940 when I originally wrote Seeing My Time. 516 00:18:13,634 --> 00:18:16,595 For many years, I didn't really understand this. 517 00:18:16,595 --> 00:18:18,115 But the more and more I learned about 518 00:18:18,115 --> 00:18:20,054 the brain, the more I realized 519 00:18:20,640 --> 00:18:23,380 that when people wanna talk about time management, 520 00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:24,799 which is kind of what's under, like, tell 521 00:18:24,799 --> 00:18:26,720 me about time. It's connected to time management. 522 00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:28,000 How do I get everything done? How can 523 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:29,539 I juggle this stuff? 524 00:18:29,914 --> 00:18:32,634 You'll never get good at time management unless 525 00:18:32,634 --> 00:18:34,414 you understand your brain 526 00:18:35,274 --> 00:18:36,414 and you understand 527 00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:40,730 the impact of your emotional brain, your limbic 528 00:18:40,730 --> 00:18:41,230 system, 529 00:18:41,609 --> 00:18:43,710 because your emotional brain, 530 00:18:44,445 --> 00:18:47,404 it controls everything. We are not logical thinking 531 00:18:47,404 --> 00:18:50,224 people. Okay? We are actually emotional. All information 532 00:18:50,285 --> 00:18:52,365 enters our brain through our limbic system, all 533 00:18:52,365 --> 00:18:53,265 sensory information. 534 00:18:53,929 --> 00:18:54,829 And if our 535 00:18:55,369 --> 00:18:56,910 brain is at peace and calm 536 00:18:57,849 --> 00:19:00,250 and the world seems safe, then the amygdala, 537 00:19:00,250 --> 00:19:02,190 which we're gonna focus on in the brain, 538 00:19:02,294 --> 00:19:04,534 and the limbic system, that's like the security 539 00:19:04,534 --> 00:19:07,414 guard. It's evaluating everything that comes in. Am 540 00:19:07,414 --> 00:19:08,474 I safe or not? 541 00:19:09,255 --> 00:19:11,569 Okay. If they make those as I'm safe, 542 00:19:11,630 --> 00:19:13,549 then that information goes into your brain and 543 00:19:13,549 --> 00:19:15,970 you can make good choices because you're accessing 544 00:19:16,029 --> 00:19:18,049 what I call your wise brain, your prefrontal 545 00:19:18,109 --> 00:19:18,609 cortex. 546 00:19:19,654 --> 00:19:21,674 But if there's something in the environment 547 00:19:22,054 --> 00:19:22,554 that 548 00:19:23,575 --> 00:19:26,054 sets off the amygdala, then it becomes what 549 00:19:26,054 --> 00:19:27,414 I call the bullying in the brain. Some 550 00:19:27,414 --> 00:19:28,880 people call it the watch dog or something 551 00:19:28,880 --> 00:19:30,660 like that. There's different names for it. 552 00:19:31,039 --> 00:19:33,119 I call it the bully because it activates 553 00:19:33,119 --> 00:19:35,555 a chemical response in your brain that shuts 554 00:19:35,795 --> 00:19:36,535 down communication 555 00:19:37,235 --> 00:19:39,555 between the neurons in your brain to get 556 00:19:39,555 --> 00:19:41,174 access to your prefrontal cortex. 557 00:19:41,475 --> 00:19:43,735 So you're operating out of fight or flight, 558 00:19:44,099 --> 00:19:44,599 okay, 559 00:19:44,900 --> 00:19:46,039 on a freeze component, 560 00:19:46,420 --> 00:19:49,000 and this is one nobody talks about, desire. 561 00:19:51,325 --> 00:19:53,265 I want to. I don't want to. 562 00:19:53,884 --> 00:19:56,924 Yeah. Nobody talks about that. Okay. So you 563 00:19:56,924 --> 00:19:58,099 have to get past 564 00:20:06,274 --> 00:20:08,115 Because if you can't get out of that, 565 00:20:08,115 --> 00:20:10,355 if you're only acting out of that, you'll 566 00:20:10,355 --> 00:20:12,194 never get good with time management. You have 567 00:20:12,194 --> 00:20:13,734 to be able to understand your brain. 568 00:20:14,115 --> 00:20:16,500 So at this point in time, when I'm 569 00:20:16,500 --> 00:20:18,259 working with people, like, we're always telling, I 570 00:20:18,259 --> 00:20:20,420 just give you strategies, a, to understand your 571 00:20:20,420 --> 00:20:20,920 brain. 572 00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,559 Because when I teach saying my time, it's 573 00:20:23,619 --> 00:20:25,480 a typically a 10 hour course. 574 00:20:26,365 --> 00:20:28,845 And the first three hours, I don't even 575 00:20:28,845 --> 00:20:31,005 talk about time. We're always talking about the 576 00:20:31,005 --> 00:20:33,485 brain, the why you act the way that 577 00:20:33,485 --> 00:20:36,440 you act. And then I'm giving them ways 578 00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:39,000 of thinking about their behavior, thinking about their 579 00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:39,500 choices, 580 00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:42,519 understanding their brain. I have to lay the 581 00:20:42,519 --> 00:20:43,019 foundation, 582 00:20:44,244 --> 00:20:45,785 and that's what people skip. 583 00:20:46,724 --> 00:20:48,565 They skip the foundation. Let's go to the 584 00:20:48,565 --> 00:20:51,285 strategies here. Use this timer. Make this list. 585 00:20:51,285 --> 00:20:53,750 Use this planner. You know, it'll all work. 586 00:20:54,309 --> 00:20:54,809 No. 587 00:20:55,430 --> 00:20:58,410 Because you're dealing with brains that are wounded. 588 00:20:58,869 --> 00:21:00,329 If you end up with somebody 589 00:21:00,950 --> 00:21:03,029 who is struggling, who has been struggling in 590 00:21:03,029 --> 00:21:03,529 school 591 00:21:03,964 --> 00:21:06,705 presently or in their past, struggling with work, 592 00:21:06,845 --> 00:21:07,904 and these are neurodivergent 593 00:21:08,205 --> 00:21:10,980 folks of the whole gamut. Okay? Those people 594 00:21:10,980 --> 00:21:13,059 are wounded, and the reason they're wounded is 595 00:21:13,059 --> 00:21:15,160 that they have an integrity issue. 596 00:21:16,099 --> 00:21:17,160 They have failed. 597 00:21:17,974 --> 00:21:20,134 They have let themselves down, and they've let 598 00:21:20,134 --> 00:21:23,194 the people around them down. They haven't met 599 00:21:23,255 --> 00:21:23,755 expectations, 600 00:21:24,375 --> 00:21:26,154 and so they're very defensive. 601 00:21:27,450 --> 00:21:29,470 And if they stay in defensive 602 00:21:29,929 --> 00:21:30,429 mode, 603 00:21:30,730 --> 00:21:32,509 that's in their emotional brain, 604 00:21:33,049 --> 00:21:34,669 they cannot change. 605 00:21:35,115 --> 00:21:37,055 It's fascinating. They cannot change. 606 00:21:38,315 --> 00:21:40,815 And my work because I'm not a therapist, 607 00:21:40,875 --> 00:21:43,115 but what I'm doing is a kind of 608 00:21:43,115 --> 00:21:45,750 cognitive behavioral therapy where it's like, you have 609 00:21:45,750 --> 00:21:47,769 to get them past that stuck point. 610 00:21:48,150 --> 00:21:50,309 Mhmm. You have to get them to this 611 00:21:50,309 --> 00:21:53,029 little space of time where they get a 612 00:21:53,029 --> 00:21:54,329 glimmer of 613 00:21:55,255 --> 00:21:57,515 hope of hope. I can get better. 614 00:21:58,694 --> 00:22:01,194 Mhmm. And it's pretty miraculous 615 00:22:01,575 --> 00:22:02,634 when that happens. 616 00:22:03,130 --> 00:22:05,049 I have an adult client right now. Oh 617 00:22:05,049 --> 00:22:05,710 my gosh. 618 00:22:06,170 --> 00:22:08,730 This gentleman and his intake form, it says, 619 00:22:08,730 --> 00:22:09,950 you know, other diagnoses. 620 00:22:10,570 --> 00:22:12,095 You know, what what do you got? Yeah. 621 00:22:12,174 --> 00:22:13,615 You have to look up one of them 622 00:22:13,615 --> 00:22:15,694 because I'd never seen that. I'd never seen 623 00:22:15,694 --> 00:22:18,434 those letter combinations before. What is that? K. 624 00:22:18,654 --> 00:22:20,494 This poor man, he let him he says, 625 00:22:20,494 --> 00:22:22,740 I'm just broken. I'm broken. I can't be 626 00:22:22,740 --> 00:22:25,299 fixed. And he's, like, 54 or something like 627 00:22:25,299 --> 00:22:25,799 that. 628 00:22:26,580 --> 00:22:27,080 Brilliant. 629 00:22:28,100 --> 00:22:30,680 Okay. Such a wonderful mind, 630 00:22:31,345 --> 00:22:32,884 but no self-concept 631 00:22:33,664 --> 00:22:35,045 of being able to be capable 632 00:22:35,505 --> 00:22:37,424 because he was always told, you're not living 633 00:22:37,424 --> 00:22:38,565 up to your potential. 634 00:22:39,319 --> 00:22:41,399 You know, you're being lazy. What blah blah 635 00:22:41,399 --> 00:22:43,500 blah blah. So it's been really interesting. 636 00:22:44,039 --> 00:22:46,299 Little by little, I'm getting him 637 00:22:46,759 --> 00:22:49,455 to to I had him smile. Mhmm. You 638 00:22:49,455 --> 00:22:51,455 know? I hope you're alright. But little by 639 00:22:51,455 --> 00:22:54,255 little, he's beginning to adapt and believe. It's 640 00:22:54,255 --> 00:22:56,650 a tiny thing. But he's using metacognition because 641 00:22:56,650 --> 00:22:58,250 you have to change people's way of thinking. 642 00:22:58,250 --> 00:22:59,529 That's the other thing about this time thing. 643 00:22:59,529 --> 00:23:01,450 Yeah. I can't change you. You know? I 644 00:23:01,450 --> 00:23:02,430 can't change anybody. 645 00:23:02,890 --> 00:23:04,490 And this is for the educators out there, 646 00:23:04,490 --> 00:23:05,390 for the ed therapist. 647 00:23:06,154 --> 00:23:08,634 Folks, step off your pedestal. You don't change 648 00:23:08,634 --> 00:23:11,775 anybody. Okay? Yep. They change themselves. 649 00:23:12,075 --> 00:23:14,095 Mhmm. You set up the situation 650 00:23:14,819 --> 00:23:15,720 and help them 651 00:23:16,099 --> 00:23:17,159 develop that metacognition. 652 00:23:17,460 --> 00:23:19,460 That's thinking about your thinking. You've thinking about, 653 00:23:19,460 --> 00:23:21,460 you know, why am I making these choices? 654 00:23:21,460 --> 00:23:24,174 You help them start to analyze it, and 655 00:23:24,174 --> 00:23:26,095 then you give them the the wings. It's 656 00:23:26,095 --> 00:23:27,054 like I said, you know, I like to 657 00:23:27,054 --> 00:23:28,335 send them out the door and and they're 658 00:23:28,335 --> 00:23:30,174 gone. They're flying at that point. You know? 659 00:23:30,174 --> 00:23:32,494 It's tentatively, you know, you don't get fixed 660 00:23:32,494 --> 00:23:35,130 overnight, but you've given them the underlying skills. 661 00:23:35,429 --> 00:23:37,929 So time is really complicated. It's invisible, 662 00:23:38,309 --> 00:23:39,990 so you have to make it concrete and 663 00:23:39,990 --> 00:23:41,954 real spatial. You have to help people think 664 00:23:41,954 --> 00:23:43,714 of it spatially. So you have to make 665 00:23:43,714 --> 00:23:45,714 it concrete and visible when you're talking about 666 00:23:45,714 --> 00:23:47,555 it, when you're working with it. And then 667 00:23:47,555 --> 00:23:49,474 you have to have to understand that their 668 00:23:49,474 --> 00:23:51,669 emotional brain gets in the way of their 669 00:23:51,669 --> 00:23:52,650 decision making 670 00:23:53,109 --> 00:23:55,769 when it comes to their choices. Complex stuff. 671 00:23:55,829 --> 00:23:57,289 I have a can you say that again? 672 00:23:57,349 --> 00:23:58,569 Making them understand 673 00:23:59,674 --> 00:24:02,335 that their behavior is tied 674 00:24:02,714 --> 00:24:05,194 to their emotional brain so that if they 675 00:24:05,194 --> 00:24:07,514 have control over that emotional brain, if they're 676 00:24:07,514 --> 00:24:09,134 aware of their emotional brain, 677 00:24:09,500 --> 00:24:11,440 then they can use metacognition, 678 00:24:12,220 --> 00:24:14,320 thinking about their thinking, to override 679 00:24:15,019 --> 00:24:18,105 that other voice, that negative voice that says 680 00:24:18,105 --> 00:24:19,804 I can't, I don't, I never. 681 00:24:20,345 --> 00:24:22,105 Yeah. Steph, why did you ask her to 682 00:24:22,105 --> 00:24:23,865 repeat that? Because I just thought it was 683 00:24:23,865 --> 00:24:26,600 powerful. Yeah. This is complicated work, you guys, 684 00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:28,519 and I think that's the challenge. I mean, 685 00:24:28,519 --> 00:24:30,279 from my perspective, everybody and their brother is 686 00:24:30,279 --> 00:24:32,855 an executive functioning coach right now. Because 10 687 00:24:32,855 --> 00:24:35,355 years ago, LDA conference in, like, 688 00:24:36,055 --> 00:24:38,615 2010, 11, 12, and put set my little 689 00:24:38,615 --> 00:24:40,654 booth up, my company's executive functioning success, and 690 00:24:40,654 --> 00:24:42,190 I sat there with my books. And I 691 00:24:42,190 --> 00:24:43,950 had people on the LDA board come by 692 00:24:43,950 --> 00:24:45,089 and say, what is this? 693 00:24:46,029 --> 00:24:47,789 You know, it wasn't that long ago, you 694 00:24:47,789 --> 00:24:48,289 guys. 695 00:24:48,589 --> 00:24:51,069 Mm-mm. And 2 years later, it was the 696 00:24:51,069 --> 00:24:51,569 headliner. 697 00:24:52,015 --> 00:24:55,394 Right? Yeah. You know? But what happened historically 698 00:24:56,174 --> 00:24:58,950 is that executive functioning back then, people got 699 00:24:59,589 --> 00:25:00,470 it. It was a bandwagon for a brief 700 00:25:00,470 --> 00:25:01,750 period of time. It was a little band 701 00:25:01,750 --> 00:25:03,190 wagon. You know, education is full of the 702 00:25:03,190 --> 00:25:05,190 buzzwords. Right? Yep. Totally. I'll just get on 703 00:25:05,190 --> 00:25:06,329 this bandwagon. Okay. 704 00:25:06,644 --> 00:25:08,404 It didn't last very long, but it was 705 00:25:08,404 --> 00:25:12,404 set for those kids. Yep. Okay. It was 706 00:25:12,404 --> 00:25:14,724 all about those kids, the kids on IEPs, 707 00:25:14,724 --> 00:25:15,704 the kids up 504s. 708 00:25:16,980 --> 00:25:18,759 Alright. So what changed, 709 00:25:19,299 --> 00:25:20,759 I had created a program 710 00:25:21,299 --> 00:25:21,779 for, 711 00:25:22,339 --> 00:25:23,319 classroom teachers, 712 00:25:23,855 --> 00:25:26,095 a program called building executive function skills in 713 00:25:26,095 --> 00:25:26,755 the classroom. 714 00:25:27,375 --> 00:25:29,055 And talking about labors of love, you know, 715 00:25:29,055 --> 00:25:30,335 you guys are talking about your work being 716 00:25:30,335 --> 00:25:31,315 a labor of love. 717 00:25:31,690 --> 00:25:34,669 I wanted to create a professional development program 718 00:25:35,450 --> 00:25:35,950 that 719 00:25:36,329 --> 00:25:38,990 I could share with classroom teachers of everything 720 00:25:39,130 --> 00:25:40,994 I wish I had known 721 00:25:41,774 --> 00:25:44,575 Mhmm. About the brain and learning before I 722 00:25:44,575 --> 00:25:45,714 ever entered a classroom. 723 00:25:46,095 --> 00:25:48,269 If only I had known that. So I 724 00:25:48,269 --> 00:25:49,789 put my heart and soul on 6 months 725 00:25:49,789 --> 00:25:51,490 of my life into creating this program. 726 00:25:51,789 --> 00:25:53,549 So this was 7, almost 8 years ago 727 00:25:53,549 --> 00:25:54,049 now. 728 00:25:54,509 --> 00:25:56,130 And what happened then? 729 00:25:56,654 --> 00:25:59,554 The bottom fell out of funding for professional 730 00:25:59,934 --> 00:26:01,714 development. It disappeared 731 00:26:02,095 --> 00:26:03,154 from school budgets. 732 00:26:04,090 --> 00:26:06,730 Gone. Around the country, particularly in Oregon, they 733 00:26:06,730 --> 00:26:09,070 took away the requirement for continuing ed 734 00:26:09,450 --> 00:26:11,085 because they were trying to save money because 735 00:26:11,164 --> 00:26:13,744 districts were funding teachers due to professional training, 736 00:26:13,884 --> 00:26:15,804 which is such a tragedy because I learned 737 00:26:15,804 --> 00:26:16,464 so much 738 00:26:16,845 --> 00:26:19,244 always, you know, keeping my credential current for 739 00:26:19,244 --> 00:26:21,669 professional development. Anyway, so I had this beautiful 740 00:26:21,669 --> 00:26:22,169 course, 741 00:26:22,630 --> 00:26:25,429 and a year later, Portland State University didn't 742 00:26:25,429 --> 00:26:28,390 even have a summer professional development program anymore 743 00:26:28,390 --> 00:26:29,049 for teachers. 744 00:26:29,554 --> 00:26:31,714 And I was like, oh, yeah. I was 745 00:26:31,714 --> 00:26:33,234 working to it. So it sat there and 746 00:26:33,234 --> 00:26:34,595 kind of languished. We left it on the 747 00:26:34,595 --> 00:26:36,355 on the website, but, you know, we were 748 00:26:36,355 --> 00:26:37,875 really happy if we got 5 people to 749 00:26:37,875 --> 00:26:40,490 find us. You know? Yep. And then along 750 00:26:40,549 --> 00:26:41,049 came 751 00:26:41,990 --> 00:26:42,490 COVID. 752 00:26:43,269 --> 00:26:43,769 Okay. 753 00:26:44,549 --> 00:26:45,049 And 754 00:26:45,590 --> 00:26:46,090 COVID 755 00:26:46,805 --> 00:26:48,744 really switched things around because 756 00:26:49,285 --> 00:26:50,984 it was so hard on educators, 757 00:26:51,285 --> 00:26:52,424 so hard on families. 758 00:26:52,805 --> 00:26:55,320 Oh my gosh. Those 1st 3 months, I 759 00:26:55,320 --> 00:26:57,480 had parents and kids screaming at each other 760 00:26:57,480 --> 00:26:58,706 and crying all the time. You know what 761 00:26:58,706 --> 00:27:01,180 I mean? It was a mess. And so 762 00:27:01,320 --> 00:27:03,080 it was crazy, all this distance learning, all 763 00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:04,994 the stressors. Well, if you stop and think 764 00:27:04,994 --> 00:27:06,994 about what I'd said earlier about the emotional 765 00:27:06,994 --> 00:27:07,494 brain, 766 00:27:07,795 --> 00:27:08,295 right, 767 00:27:08,755 --> 00:27:11,734 our brains, the world's brains, okay, 768 00:27:12,039 --> 00:27:15,000 were all on high alert thinking we might 769 00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:15,500 die. 770 00:27:16,360 --> 00:27:18,519 And so we forget about it. We're really 771 00:27:18,519 --> 00:27:20,934 good about putting history out of our minds. 772 00:27:20,934 --> 00:27:22,855 We're only interested in the present. Not that 773 00:27:22,855 --> 00:27:24,615 long ago, you know, there were mass graves 774 00:27:24,615 --> 00:27:26,234 in New York City. Okay. 775 00:27:26,695 --> 00:27:27,515 And so 776 00:27:27,950 --> 00:27:30,049 it was this time of just total upheaval. 777 00:27:30,670 --> 00:27:32,670 Everybody was struggling in the education world. Parents 778 00:27:32,670 --> 00:27:34,210 were struggling in the education world. 779 00:27:34,509 --> 00:27:36,769 Then things started to settle down again, 780 00:27:38,144 --> 00:27:39,904 and I got a call from a local 781 00:27:39,904 --> 00:27:42,464 private school that I've done different trainings with 782 00:27:42,464 --> 00:27:44,865 through the years. They called and said, Mary 783 00:27:44,865 --> 00:27:47,490 d, can you come and talk to us 784 00:27:47,710 --> 00:27:51,309 again about executive functioning for a professional development 785 00:27:51,309 --> 00:27:51,809 class? 786 00:27:52,269 --> 00:27:53,710 And it had been a couple of years 787 00:27:53,710 --> 00:27:55,515 since I'd been there. I said, yeah. Sure. 788 00:27:55,515 --> 00:27:56,795 That had to be really close to my 789 00:27:56,795 --> 00:27:58,634 house, and so I was like, I'm willing 790 00:27:58,634 --> 00:27:59,914 to get up and go. You're you're it's 791 00:27:59,914 --> 00:28:01,595 a mile away from my house. And I 792 00:28:01,595 --> 00:28:03,195 got there, and they were almost all the 793 00:28:03,195 --> 00:28:04,015 same teachers. 794 00:28:04,779 --> 00:28:06,860 Okay? And some of those teachers had taken 795 00:28:06,860 --> 00:28:09,100 my courses. What am I gonna tell you 796 00:28:09,100 --> 00:28:11,740 guys? You know, there's nothing earth shatteringly different 797 00:28:11,740 --> 00:28:13,920 about executive functioning and the time span. 798 00:28:14,595 --> 00:28:16,375 They, the audience, was different. 799 00:28:17,154 --> 00:28:18,534 They now saw 800 00:28:18,835 --> 00:28:22,615 that executive functioning impacted all of their students 801 00:28:23,080 --> 00:28:24,440 and impacted them 802 00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:25,660 themselves. 803 00:28:26,440 --> 00:28:29,000 Because what happens it's very interesting. I heard 804 00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:30,220 this at a conference where 805 00:28:30,954 --> 00:28:33,034 anxiety is an emotion. Alright? It's part of 806 00:28:33,034 --> 00:28:36,315 the sympathetic nervous system responses or parasympathetic. Yes. 807 00:28:36,315 --> 00:28:38,335 But, anyway, it's a nerve response. 808 00:28:39,170 --> 00:28:40,470 So anxiety emotion. 809 00:28:41,090 --> 00:28:42,789 When we are under high anxiety, 810 00:28:43,490 --> 00:28:46,070 it has a negative impact on working memory. 811 00:28:47,315 --> 00:28:50,134 Okay. It diminishes our working memory capacity. 812 00:28:50,595 --> 00:28:51,815 Well, working memory 813 00:28:52,674 --> 00:28:53,494 is critical 814 00:28:53,795 --> 00:28:55,974 for all of our executive functions. 815 00:28:56,950 --> 00:28:59,109 So when my neuropsych friends put it this 816 00:28:59,109 --> 00:28:59,609 way, 817 00:28:59,990 --> 00:29:02,950 if all of your executive functioning skills, and 818 00:29:02,950 --> 00:29:05,715 I'm talking about things like goal directed persistence, 819 00:29:06,974 --> 00:29:07,875 sustained attention, 820 00:29:08,335 --> 00:29:09,154 time management, 821 00:29:09,775 --> 00:29:10,835 planning an organization. 822 00:29:11,535 --> 00:29:13,490 That's just to name some of them. If 823 00:29:13,490 --> 00:29:16,789 all of those skills are pathways or highways 824 00:29:17,009 --> 00:29:19,170 in your prefrontal cortex, the the part of 825 00:29:19,170 --> 00:29:21,595 your brain behind your forehead, Okay? If those 826 00:29:21,595 --> 00:29:22,414 are pathways, 827 00:29:22,795 --> 00:29:25,755 working memory is the tunnel that all those 828 00:29:25,755 --> 00:29:28,320 pathways, those highways have to use. So if 829 00:29:28,320 --> 00:29:30,880 your working memory capacity is smaller, then not 830 00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:33,119 all the highways can get through. There's conversion 831 00:29:33,119 --> 00:29:34,580 at the block. It's got stuck. 832 00:29:35,174 --> 00:29:38,615 Well, during that COVID time, everybody was experiencing 833 00:29:38,615 --> 00:29:39,515 that high anxiety, 834 00:29:40,055 --> 00:29:42,615 and everybody was struggling. I had my friends 835 00:29:42,615 --> 00:29:44,394 who were good executive functioners 836 00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:46,220 or fallen apart. 837 00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:49,000 And they were like, what happened to me? 838 00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:50,039 I used to be able to do all 839 00:29:50,039 --> 00:29:51,480 this stuff. How come I can't finish a 840 00:29:51,480 --> 00:29:53,265 book? You know? How come I'm showing up 841 00:29:53,265 --> 00:29:54,625 late? How come I can't do x, y, 842 00:29:54,625 --> 00:29:56,945 and z? So that anxiety went way up 843 00:29:56,945 --> 00:29:59,859 and production went down with working memory. So 844 00:29:59,859 --> 00:30:02,119 it's fascinating. So the teachers were sitting there 845 00:30:02,500 --> 00:30:04,899 really relating to the fact that no longer 846 00:30:04,899 --> 00:30:07,079 was it executive functioning about them. 847 00:30:07,654 --> 00:30:09,835 It was about all of us. Yep. 848 00:30:10,214 --> 00:30:11,835 It's about all of our choices 849 00:30:12,214 --> 00:30:13,035 every day. 850 00:30:13,654 --> 00:30:16,009 So what was fascinating to me was that 851 00:30:16,009 --> 00:30:18,269 the enrollment in my courses just went boom. 852 00:30:19,450 --> 00:30:19,950 Okay. 853 00:30:20,490 --> 00:30:23,924 So now we have very full, robust courses 854 00:30:23,985 --> 00:30:26,244 of amazing teachers, okay, 855 00:30:26,545 --> 00:30:28,005 who are applying this 856 00:30:28,465 --> 00:30:31,559 to all subject matters across the curriculums in 857 00:30:31,559 --> 00:30:34,139 different age groups. It's amazing. It's wonderful. 858 00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:36,200 It took a long time for that to 859 00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:38,045 happen. It took years for it to come, 860 00:30:38,525 --> 00:30:41,244 but it's really rewarding because that's what executive 861 00:30:41,244 --> 00:30:43,404 functioning is, is it's part of our choices. 862 00:30:43,404 --> 00:30:45,325 It's all about our choices. And if we 863 00:30:45,325 --> 00:30:47,424 understand our brain, then we have choice. 864 00:30:48,009 --> 00:30:49,549 We can actually have that conversation, 865 00:30:49,849 --> 00:30:52,250 and we can maximize our potential. That's my 866 00:30:52,250 --> 00:30:53,950 mission in life, is to help people 867 00:30:54,250 --> 00:30:56,065 maximize their potential. Each of us have a 868 00:30:56,065 --> 00:30:57,904 unique potential. Each of us have a unique 869 00:30:57,904 --> 00:30:58,404 brain. 870 00:30:58,785 --> 00:31:00,144 And how do you figure out how to 871 00:31:00,144 --> 00:31:01,184 hack it? That's what I tell people. I 872 00:31:01,184 --> 00:31:02,464 say hack your brain. Don't let it get 873 00:31:02,464 --> 00:31:04,019 in the way. Who's in charge? You or 874 00:31:04,019 --> 00:31:05,779 your brain? You know? They look at me 875 00:31:05,779 --> 00:31:06,680 like, what? 876 00:31:07,539 --> 00:31:08,039 Mhmm. 877 00:31:08,980 --> 00:31:09,480 Yeah. 878 00:31:09,859 --> 00:31:11,640 So we talk about 879 00:31:12,164 --> 00:31:14,884 time and not letting it control you, but 880 00:31:14,884 --> 00:31:18,345 you controlling it and production and the ability 881 00:31:18,404 --> 00:31:18,904 to 882 00:31:19,365 --> 00:31:21,190 do what you need to do, when you 883 00:31:21,190 --> 00:31:22,549 need to do it, and how you need 884 00:31:22,549 --> 00:31:24,710 to do it, and Where to do it. 885 00:31:24,789 --> 00:31:27,049 Where to do it. And the difference of 886 00:31:27,755 --> 00:31:28,734 want and need 887 00:31:29,355 --> 00:31:31,914 because that is a lot of when the 888 00:31:31,914 --> 00:31:33,375 parents call and say 889 00:31:33,835 --> 00:31:36,210 the trigger word of lazy that we all 890 00:31:36,210 --> 00:31:38,309 feel is just so 891 00:31:39,569 --> 00:31:42,210 constantly reminding everyone, the parents that I speak 892 00:31:42,210 --> 00:31:44,130 to, that if your child could, they would. 893 00:31:44,130 --> 00:31:45,065 Right. So 894 00:31:45,365 --> 00:31:48,164 I'm sort of interested in when you're talking 895 00:31:48,164 --> 00:31:48,664 to 896 00:31:49,365 --> 00:31:50,105 the teachers 897 00:31:50,484 --> 00:31:52,744 about this, what have you noticed 898 00:31:53,089 --> 00:31:54,390 how they have started 899 00:31:55,089 --> 00:31:57,829 to approach that from your courses? 900 00:31:58,210 --> 00:32:01,750 Well, I have 2 courses. Okay? Okay. And 901 00:32:02,305 --> 00:32:05,424 one course was originally designed. It's called Teaching 902 00:32:05,424 --> 00:32:07,605 Seeing My Time. It goes with the workbook. 903 00:32:07,744 --> 00:32:10,005 Okay? It's a Mhmm. The curriculum, basically. 904 00:32:11,069 --> 00:32:13,250 And the market for that, originally, 905 00:32:13,950 --> 00:32:15,329 I saw as ed therapists. 906 00:32:15,710 --> 00:32:18,035 Okay? And so ed therapists use it, speech 907 00:32:18,115 --> 00:32:19,955 paths use it, OTs use it. There's a 908 00:32:19,955 --> 00:32:21,795 whole bunch of different people who use it, 909 00:32:21,795 --> 00:32:24,615 but I didn't see that in the classroom 910 00:32:24,994 --> 00:32:25,734 too much. 911 00:32:26,119 --> 00:32:27,500 Mhmm. The reason 912 00:32:29,080 --> 00:32:30,920 being, schools don't wanna spend any money on 913 00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:31,420 workbooks. 914 00:32:31,720 --> 00:32:32,220 Right? 915 00:32:33,799 --> 00:32:35,565 And it would be time 916 00:32:36,024 --> 00:32:38,264 in the school schedule is so oppressive to 917 00:32:38,264 --> 00:32:40,345 teachers. They've obviously, all this curriculum, all this 918 00:32:40,345 --> 00:32:41,944 stuff I have to cover. I Yeah. Add 919 00:32:41,944 --> 00:32:43,544 one more weird thing to my life, and 920 00:32:43,544 --> 00:32:44,365 it won't work. 921 00:32:44,890 --> 00:32:46,330 Whereas I'm sitting here going, oh my god. 922 00:32:46,330 --> 00:32:48,410 If you just invested 10 hours upfront in 923 00:32:48,410 --> 00:32:51,289 September, October, your whole school year would go 924 00:32:51,289 --> 00:32:53,755 so much better. Okay? It's front loading a 925 00:32:53,755 --> 00:32:55,835 calendar right there. Just can't do it. It's 926 00:32:55,835 --> 00:32:58,154 really interesting. One of the schools that has 927 00:32:58,154 --> 00:33:00,954 consist a public school, okay, which is rare, 928 00:33:00,954 --> 00:33:02,494 k, because of funding. 929 00:33:02,799 --> 00:33:05,220 The one public school that is consistently 930 00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:08,100 still using Seeing My Time workbooks, 931 00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:09,140 okay, 932 00:33:09,519 --> 00:33:10,740 and my planners, 933 00:33:11,120 --> 00:33:11,620 okay, 934 00:33:11,994 --> 00:33:12,894 is a relatively 935 00:33:13,275 --> 00:33:15,355 poor district. When I came to speak, I 936 00:33:15,355 --> 00:33:16,255 charged them $500, 937 00:33:16,555 --> 00:33:18,394 okay, which is pretty darn low for a 938 00:33:18,394 --> 00:33:20,394 speaking engagement, and I drove to get there. 939 00:33:20,394 --> 00:33:22,940 Okay? Like, an hour halfway. Yeah. When I 940 00:33:22,940 --> 00:33:24,240 got there, I was in the auditorium, 941 00:33:24,539 --> 00:33:27,100 small school, middle school. They had to split. 942 00:33:27,100 --> 00:33:29,279 The the middle school budget had $250, 943 00:33:29,984 --> 00:33:32,144 the principal, and they got 250 from the 944 00:33:32,144 --> 00:33:35,125 superintendent's fund, okay, to come up with $500. 945 00:33:35,424 --> 00:33:36,484 Alright. Mhmm. 946 00:33:36,785 --> 00:33:38,545 The reason why they still use it you 947 00:33:38,545 --> 00:33:39,845 know who was in the room? 948 00:33:40,339 --> 00:33:41,160 The superintendent. 949 00:33:42,019 --> 00:33:44,099 Mhmm. He was in the room. So it's 950 00:33:44,099 --> 00:33:46,740 a leadership issue in part. Getting a hold 951 00:33:46,740 --> 00:33:48,855 of them is really hard. Yeah. Okay. 952 00:33:49,794 --> 00:33:50,914 If you guys figure it out, let me 953 00:33:50,914 --> 00:33:53,954 know. Okay? Yeah. Yeah. Because they're the leadership 954 00:33:53,954 --> 00:33:56,194 at the top. Like I said, professional development 955 00:33:56,194 --> 00:33:57,909 training has just plummeted. You know, we used 956 00:33:57,909 --> 00:33:59,349 to be invited to public schools all the 957 00:33:59,349 --> 00:34:00,710 time. I did a lot of training with 958 00:34:00,710 --> 00:34:02,470 lots of people, and the money just dried 959 00:34:02,470 --> 00:34:04,710 up and disappeared, you know, prior to COVID 960 00:34:04,710 --> 00:34:05,194 even. 961 00:34:05,514 --> 00:34:07,835 So I didn't think peach people would come 962 00:34:07,994 --> 00:34:09,835 teachers would end up in teaching Saint My 963 00:34:09,835 --> 00:34:11,534 Time. That has changed 964 00:34:11,914 --> 00:34:14,010 in the last year. I have a lot 965 00:34:14,010 --> 00:34:15,150 of classroom teachers 966 00:34:15,530 --> 00:34:16,750 and learning specialists 967 00:34:17,449 --> 00:34:19,150 Mhmm. Taking that course. 968 00:34:19,690 --> 00:34:22,655 And that is wonderful because, again, that's very 969 00:34:22,655 --> 00:34:23,635 carefully scaffolded. 970 00:34:23,934 --> 00:34:25,614 You know? And it's a program in a 971 00:34:25,614 --> 00:34:26,894 box. You know what I mean? This is 972 00:34:26,894 --> 00:34:29,460 like, follow this. You do this, and it 973 00:34:29,460 --> 00:34:31,400 will work. Okay? You will have results. 974 00:34:31,860 --> 00:34:33,539 So then the other course, the building effect 975 00:34:33,539 --> 00:34:35,079 is functioning skills in the classroom, 976 00:34:35,940 --> 00:34:38,894 that came about because of an educator 977 00:34:39,275 --> 00:34:41,295 who took my previous first course, 978 00:34:41,594 --> 00:34:43,514 and she wanted to put more stuff about 979 00:34:43,514 --> 00:34:45,275 the brain and learning in, which I didn't 980 00:34:45,275 --> 00:34:47,589 really have the background in. So I didn't 981 00:34:47,589 --> 00:34:49,349 feel like at that point in time, I 982 00:34:49,349 --> 00:34:51,030 was able to speak to that. You know, 983 00:34:51,030 --> 00:34:52,789 how would I do that? Mhmm. And she 984 00:34:52,789 --> 00:34:54,309 happened to be a, you know, a Stanford 985 00:34:54,309 --> 00:34:55,210 PhD person. 986 00:34:55,885 --> 00:34:57,164 And she go, oh, Mary d, we can 987 00:34:57,164 --> 00:34:59,085 do this. And she kind of, you know, 988 00:34:59,085 --> 00:35:00,764 took me by the hand and found me 989 00:35:00,764 --> 00:35:01,264 resources. 990 00:35:02,125 --> 00:35:04,049 That course, I designed 991 00:35:04,349 --> 00:35:04,849 thinking 992 00:35:05,309 --> 00:35:06,049 my goal 993 00:35:06,909 --> 00:35:09,150 was to have teachers come away no matter 994 00:35:09,150 --> 00:35:10,849 what subject area they were in 995 00:35:11,755 --> 00:35:13,135 to be able to integrate 996 00:35:13,914 --> 00:35:15,694 teaching executive functioning 997 00:35:16,394 --> 00:35:18,174 into their daily curriculum. 998 00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:21,380 Integrated. Not as a separate thing, but integrated. 999 00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:22,739 And 1000 00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:24,960 I wanted to do it by going to 1001 00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:26,719 the brain. The whole course at the beginning 1002 00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:28,704 is all about brain learning. Yeah. It's great 1003 00:35:28,704 --> 00:35:31,105 course. People love it. Okay? They love both 1004 00:35:31,105 --> 00:35:31,844 of the courses. 1005 00:35:32,144 --> 00:35:32,804 The education 1006 00:35:33,105 --> 00:35:34,625 educators and parents who are taking 1007 00:35:35,344 --> 00:35:37,539 I signed up for this to help kids, 1008 00:35:37,539 --> 00:35:39,140 but, oh my god, this is doing my 1009 00:35:39,140 --> 00:35:41,640 life. Yeah. They're helping me. Yeah. You know? 1010 00:35:41,699 --> 00:35:43,539 But then so seeing my time, because the 1011 00:35:43,539 --> 00:35:45,380 beginning of that whole course is mostly brain 1012 00:35:45,380 --> 00:35:46,505 and learning stuff, 1013 00:35:46,824 --> 00:35:47,724 very again, 1014 00:35:48,184 --> 00:35:50,424 I'm a designer, I'm a creative, and I'm 1015 00:35:50,424 --> 00:35:52,505 a teacher. Okay? So all the videos are 1016 00:35:52,505 --> 00:35:53,864 short and distinct. You know what I mean? 1017 00:35:53,864 --> 00:35:56,284 It's, like, user friendly. It's learner friendly. 1018 00:35:56,960 --> 00:35:59,760 So seeing my time then is actually the 1019 00:35:59,760 --> 00:36:00,260 concepts 1020 00:36:01,279 --> 00:36:02,819 are at the end of that course. 1021 00:36:03,655 --> 00:36:05,974 Okay? Because I didn't expect the teachers to 1022 00:36:05,974 --> 00:36:07,815 be able to run a course with the 1023 00:36:07,815 --> 00:36:08,315 workbook. 1024 00:36:08,934 --> 00:36:11,175 But I then help them understand how they 1025 00:36:11,175 --> 00:36:13,630 can implement the same core concepts 1026 00:36:14,170 --> 00:36:15,150 without the program. 1027 00:36:15,769 --> 00:36:17,690 That said, what I always tell everybody is 1028 00:36:17,690 --> 00:36:18,510 like, and 1029 00:36:19,130 --> 00:36:20,730 figure out a way to communicate with your 1030 00:36:20,730 --> 00:36:22,005 parents. Yeah. 1031 00:36:22,465 --> 00:36:24,304 Mhmm. That's why I wrote my book, 50 1032 00:36:24,304 --> 00:36:25,764 tips to help students succeed 1033 00:36:26,144 --> 00:36:27,045 was because 1034 00:36:27,505 --> 00:36:29,264 seeing my time was beginning to be used 1035 00:36:29,264 --> 00:36:30,005 in schools. 1036 00:36:30,369 --> 00:36:32,449 And I had a problem with that because 1037 00:36:32,449 --> 00:36:33,269 of the transference 1038 00:36:33,650 --> 00:36:34,309 of information. 1039 00:36:34,690 --> 00:36:37,650 Parents not understanding brain development, not understanding executive 1040 00:36:37,650 --> 00:36:41,164 functioning, get labeling their kids lazy. Mhmm. Yep. 1041 00:36:41,164 --> 00:36:42,924 Sending their kids off to private school, thinking 1042 00:36:42,924 --> 00:36:44,764 the private school people are gonna fix them. 1043 00:36:44,764 --> 00:36:47,159 Okay? Yep. So I wrote that book for 1044 00:36:47,159 --> 00:36:47,659 them 1045 00:36:48,839 --> 00:36:50,839 because I know you have it, Steph. Mhmm. 1046 00:36:50,839 --> 00:36:52,839 It's very carefully written. There's like most of 1047 00:36:52,839 --> 00:36:55,179 the tips are 700 words or less. 1048 00:36:55,574 --> 00:36:57,494 Why? Because parents don't have time to read 1049 00:36:57,494 --> 00:36:59,734 more than that. Okay? Yep. And they're very 1050 00:36:59,734 --> 00:37:02,134 targeted. Because there were books written for parents 1051 00:37:02,134 --> 00:37:03,594 out there on executive functioning, 1052 00:37:04,329 --> 00:37:06,409 most of which I could not get through. 1053 00:37:06,409 --> 00:37:08,650 You have to have good executive functioning skills 1054 00:37:08,650 --> 00:37:10,730 to get through the EF books. Yeah. Yeah. 1055 00:37:10,730 --> 00:37:11,690 And then and then when you get to 1056 00:37:11,690 --> 00:37:12,885 the end, they'll say, and now what am 1057 00:37:12,885 --> 00:37:13,945 I supposed to do? 1058 00:37:14,244 --> 00:37:16,164 Right. What's the takeaway? So I wanted this 1059 00:37:16,164 --> 00:37:17,925 book to not be that way, you know. 1060 00:37:17,925 --> 00:37:20,500 But it's definitely not. Yeah. It's definitely like 1061 00:37:20,739 --> 00:37:22,340 Go to where you need. Go to where 1062 00:37:22,340 --> 00:37:24,660 you need. Yeah. I love how it's broken 1063 00:37:24,660 --> 00:37:26,579 down and where it's showing up in different 1064 00:37:26,579 --> 00:37:28,340 parts of their lives as well. It's not 1065 00:37:28,340 --> 00:37:30,925 just getting homework done. So Which guides me 1066 00:37:30,925 --> 00:37:32,224 into my next question. 1067 00:37:34,045 --> 00:37:35,699 We did do a Patreon 1068 00:37:36,099 --> 00:37:36,679 extended conversation 1069 00:37:37,460 --> 00:37:40,019 with Mary d. We will be releasing that 1070 00:37:40,019 --> 00:37:40,519 episode 1071 00:37:40,980 --> 00:37:44,065 next week because you really do need to 1072 00:37:44,065 --> 00:37:46,784 listen to the entire conversation before listening to 1073 00:37:46,784 --> 00:37:49,184 that Patreon. If you want to hear that 1074 00:37:49,184 --> 00:37:51,980 extended conversation, and believe me, you do, go 1075 00:37:52,059 --> 00:37:52,559 ahead 1076 00:37:52,940 --> 00:37:55,900 and make sure you are a $5 a 1077 00:37:55,900 --> 00:37:57,119 month monthly subscriber. 1078 00:37:57,579 --> 00:37:59,980 Obviously, that $5 a month goes to support 1079 00:37:59,980 --> 00:38:01,934 the podcast and the work that we're doing 1080 00:38:01,934 --> 00:38:04,894 here. And we thank you through these extended 1081 00:38:04,894 --> 00:38:06,974 conversations. You can go back as long as 1082 00:38:06,974 --> 00:38:09,775 you want. They're all there and other things 1083 00:38:09,775 --> 00:38:11,619 that we throw up there for you guys 1084 00:38:11,619 --> 00:38:12,359 as well.