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How do you help someone tell their spouse

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that they have secretly been viewing pornography?

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Wow. These are tough situations.

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Thankfully, one of my favorite and most effective

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therapist, Jeff Struer, put together a presentation about

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disclosing betrayal.

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Jeff explains how disclosing betrayal can make recovery

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and repentance

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so much more difficult if it isn't handled

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correctly.

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This isn't a rip the band aid off

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quickly type of situation.

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With a better understanding of betrayal, church leaders

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can be a strong resource

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in helping couples navigate the awful effects of

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pornography usage. You can watch Jeff's entire presentation

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at no cost in the Liberating Saints virtual

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library. Simply go to leading saints.org/14,

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and you can sign up for 14 days

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of free access to Jeff's presentation

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and the entire library. It's one of my

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favorite interviews.

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So you're checking us out as maybe a

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potential podcast you could start listening to. I

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know many of you have been listening for

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a long time, but let me just talk

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to the newbies for a minute. What is

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Leading Saints? What are we trying to do

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here with this podcast?

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Let me explain. Leading Saints is a nonprofit

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organization. A 501c3

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is what they call it, and we have

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a mission

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to help Latter day Saints be better prepared

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to lead. Now, of course, often means in

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the context of a calling. It may mean

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in your local community, your work assignments.

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We've heard about our content influencing

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all sorts of leaders in all sorts of

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different contexts.

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We invite you to listen to this episode

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and maybe a few others of our 500

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plus episodes that we have out there. Jump

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in and begin to learn and begin to

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consider some of these principles we talk about

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on the Leading Saints podcast. Here we go.

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The Robert Farrell

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episode is done. It's here. You're about to

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listen to it. This has been a long

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time coming.

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Not only has Robert Farrell been in Peru

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for the past 3 years serving as a

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mission president with his awesome wife, but we

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had a live event back in July, and

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we've been trying to edit this and get

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it ready for the the general audience. So

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this episode, as you're about to see, was

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recorded in front of a live studio audience.

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Right? And, my technical stuff isn't ideal, and

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we'll get through the there's a few little

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sound issues, but that's alright. You will get

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the content. You'll be inspired by it,

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and you will love it. It's just fun

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to hear

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of Robert's experience in Peru walking into this

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this experience that we're somewhat all familiar with.

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I mean, generally, we know what a mission

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president does, but we really don't know

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what a mission president does. And the the

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dynamics they face, the leadership challenges, and so

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it was just so fun picking the brain

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of Robert Ferrell and saying, how did you

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do it? How did you do the 1st

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year, the 2nd year, the 3rd year? And

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what would you face? How did you engage

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with these missionaries and and inspire them, you

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know, with life and in motivation and encouragement

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and listen for how he leveraged

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patriarchal

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blessings

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amongst his missionaries. It's just so inspiring,

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such a simple idea that really any leader

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can do with anybody that has a patriarchal

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blessing. And then I just love the sweet

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stories, the one on one experiences, how we

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engaged

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with missionaries

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to help them overcome what they saw as

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their their weakness in life, to overcome and

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focus on talents and abilities and engage them

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in the gospel.

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We talked about it all. And and in

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the best Robert Ferrell fashion, he gives it

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to us straight.

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He really challenges us as a as a

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leadership culture, as individuals, and I lean into

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it. I I love the straight talk from

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Robert Ferrell. He has such a good heart.

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I consider him a great friend. It's so

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nice to to have him back in the

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homeland here. And, this will not be the

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last time you hear from Robert Ferrell. I'm

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excited to get him back on the podcast

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and learn more and more from him. So

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here we go. Let's jump into it. Be

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sure to share this one. Lots of people

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are gonna benefit from it. So here's my

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interview in front of a live studio audience

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in Lehi, Utah with Robert Farrell.

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Welcome back to another episode of the Leading

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Saints podcast. Today, I'm in Lehi, Utah

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with a live studio audience. Let's hear it.

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That's 10,000 people strong, folks, so

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I swear.

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So I'll just give a little bit background

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how this came to be.

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A few years ago,

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a mutual friend connected me and Robert, and

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I get this a lot. Oh, you gotta

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talk to this guy. Yeah. I bet he's

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great. You know? And then I'm sometimes I'm

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disappointed. Well, I thought it would be better

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be to to be honest, but no. So

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we did lunch,

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and we met, one day in your dentist

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office, in your in your back office there.

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And as he's talking, I can tell that

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there's something special

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about this episode. And I think, I just

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hope my equipment just works. Like, I gotta

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make sure I get this. And I remember

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calling my wife on the way home and

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saying, I just recorded the best episode ever.

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And ever since then, it has literally been

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the best, most downloaded

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episode

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on the podcast. And, what is it with?

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Robert Farrell.

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So you're back from 3 years. So you

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got we we that was a couple years

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before your mission call.

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And then

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we did actually did some more content where

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you did 4 plus hours of

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a presentation

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in South Salt Lake and recorded that. And

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then you called me up and said, I'm

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being called to serve.

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And you were I almost left the church.

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Oh, I almost left the church. Yeah. Well,

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you're not the first one, my friend. So

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so,

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maybe tell us the story of,

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like, how the mission call came to be.

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What what do you remember from that? Yeah.

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I got a phone call from the office

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of Elder Redlin to wanting to meet with

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us. And

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so Laurie and I went down to church

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headquarters to meet with them. We weren't quite

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sure what that meant.

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And,

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it was funny because I'm a little bit

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of a rebel and kinda push the envelope

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sometimes.

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So the first thing Laurie said to me

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when I told her that elder Renlund's office

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had called, she said,

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what have you done now?

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That that was is that the truth on

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that you really said that? Yes. Okay.

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So we went down and,

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had about a 2 hour interview with Elder

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Renlund,

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and that was an absolutely amazing experience. It's

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too bad more of us can't have those

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interactions with the 12.

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So he could have asked us to do

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anything. I think at that moment, we would

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have said yes, but we didn't really know

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what would happen at that point. And then

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several weeks later, we got a call. I

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I guess, I didn't realize this, but only

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a member of the first presidency issues the

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call to mission president, mission leaders. So then

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we met with elder Ren or elder, president

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Irene for

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another 2 hours

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and got the call extended to us. And

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then you wait for the mission call? Yeah.

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And we waited for the mission call. We

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did a terrible thing. We, got the call

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about, oh, 2, 3 weeks before Christmas.

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We wrapped it up and put it under

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the Christmas tree. Don't do that.

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And ruined our Christmas Eve, you know, when

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we opened it up and we're going to

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Peru and little further away from home than

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everyone thought. And so So why did it

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ruin the Christmas Eve? Like, because the kids

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didn't know or what? 4000 miles away. You

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know? Oh, okay. It's a long ways away.

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We left,

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7, 6 kids behind. And so, know, they're

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all young adults. They're all starting their lives,

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so it's a tough time to leave. Yeah.

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Yeah. What do you remember from that time

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just, like, in preparation? Like, you get the

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call, like, you kinda your your brain shifts

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a little bit, I imagine.

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Yeah.

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The best counsel that I got, because you

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start thinking about all the things that you

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should be preparing to do and how you're

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gonna run the mission.

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And and someone gave me the best counsel

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that,

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you just need to prepare your heart

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to be teachable because it's not your mission,

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and it's the lord's mission. And

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prepare yourself.

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Don't prepare an agenda. Don't prepare programs.

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Just prepare yourself. Yeah. Because this is that's

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the temptation. Right? Because, obviously, you were a

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young missionary, and so you you remember that.

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And I think in all leadership experiences, you

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have this feeling of, you know, when we

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I remember being called as bishop and being

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you know, being like, okay. Now is my

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chance. Like, all those ideas I had, I

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can now implement them, but then I quickly

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realized, oh, there's a reason that the other

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guys didn't do that way. Right? And so

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you kinda

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psych yourself up that way and be disappointed

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later. Right. Yeah. Matter of fact, got one

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of a few of my missionaries. How many

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how many How many How many how many

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how many how many how many president Farrell

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missionaries do we have?

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Oh, wow. Hey. Stand up real quick so

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we can see you better.

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The best of the best right there. Oh

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my goodness. Wow.

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Awesome. And let's Along those lines, Ethan right

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there with the cowboy or the baseball hat.

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I'm gonna embarrass him for a minute. He

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was in the mission when I first got

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there, and he left, I think, in December.

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So he was there for our 1st 6

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months.

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And

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I have learned more from these missionaries

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than I have taught it.

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And

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lateral mentoring is really important,

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but having an environment of love and trust.

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Elder

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Harrison, Ethan,

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I was in the mission maybe a month

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or 2 with what you're just saying. All

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my ideas Yeah. All these,

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themes I wanted to do, all these brilliant

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ideas that I had.

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And good old elder Harrison walked into my

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office and had the guts to tell his

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mission present. You're distracting permission.

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You gotta stay and preach my gospel.

269
00:09:41,605 --> 00:09:43,205
You're giving all these other themes and all

270
00:09:43,205 --> 00:09:45,285
these other topics, and and the mission's going

271
00:09:45,285 --> 00:09:47,524
in that direction, and we gotta stay focused

272
00:09:47,524 --> 00:09:48,664
on preaching my gospel.

273
00:09:48,965 --> 00:09:51,285
And I thought, wow. What what courage that

274
00:09:51,285 --> 00:09:53,125
would have taken to do that to your

275
00:09:53,125 --> 00:09:54,264
brand new mission president?

276
00:09:54,699 --> 00:09:56,299
But that changed the course of my whole

277
00:09:56,299 --> 00:09:58,699
mission. It really helped me forget about myself,

278
00:09:58,699 --> 00:10:01,419
and it's about the brethren's program, the lord's

279
00:10:01,419 --> 00:10:04,539
program, not Yeah. My program. Right. And, again,

280
00:10:04,539 --> 00:10:07,259
you know, the so many dynamic people are

281
00:10:07,259 --> 00:10:07,759
called

282
00:10:08,125 --> 00:10:10,285
some with great lead or a great leadership

283
00:10:10,285 --> 00:10:12,764
or business experience. And so it's helpful to

284
00:10:12,764 --> 00:10:15,485
get that feedback. Right? Yeah. And bless your

285
00:10:15,485 --> 00:10:17,085
heart that you had a missionary giving it

286
00:10:17,085 --> 00:10:18,684
and that you were a a leader willing

287
00:10:18,684 --> 00:10:21,449
to receive it. So that's awesome. So anything

288
00:10:21,449 --> 00:10:24,490
else about those preparation year months leading up

289
00:10:24,490 --> 00:10:25,610
to your mission that,

290
00:10:26,089 --> 00:10:26,750
would be

291
00:10:27,129 --> 00:10:27,949
worth noting?

292
00:10:28,409 --> 00:10:30,089
To be honest, it was just a total

293
00:10:30,089 --> 00:10:32,009
whirlwind. We had to sell everything we had

294
00:10:32,009 --> 00:10:33,529
to go. So we are busy selling our

295
00:10:33,529 --> 00:10:36,254
house and my practice and and had everything.

296
00:10:36,254 --> 00:10:39,054
So almost didn't have time to really prepare

297
00:10:39,054 --> 00:10:41,054
a lot. Just getting that all ready to

298
00:10:41,054 --> 00:10:41,554
go.

299
00:10:42,014 --> 00:10:42,514
And

300
00:10:43,054 --> 00:10:44,815
so no. I think,

301
00:10:45,455 --> 00:10:47,294
we went to the mission field with very

302
00:10:47,294 --> 00:10:47,794
much

303
00:10:48,350 --> 00:10:50,110
a lot of humility. I I don't speak

304
00:10:50,110 --> 00:10:52,670
Spanish very well as my missionaries all know.

305
00:10:52,670 --> 00:10:54,430
Now you served in the Dominican Republic as

306
00:10:54,430 --> 00:10:56,269
a young missionary. The ugliest Spanish in the

307
00:10:56,269 --> 00:10:57,090
entire world.

308
00:10:57,950 --> 00:11:00,029
And and then I had a very speech

309
00:11:00,190 --> 00:11:02,269
a very severe speech impediment growing up. So

310
00:11:02,269 --> 00:11:04,545
I just struggle with Spanish in my primary

311
00:11:04,545 --> 00:11:05,045
mission

312
00:11:05,425 --> 00:11:07,665
and then really struggle with Spanish when we

313
00:11:07,665 --> 00:11:10,545
got there. So my wonderful wife saved the

314
00:11:10,545 --> 00:11:13,024
day. She speaks like a Latin, so she

315
00:11:13,024 --> 00:11:14,705
was really helping able to help us get

316
00:11:14,705 --> 00:11:16,485
on our feet and help out a lot.

317
00:11:16,610 --> 00:11:18,470
I think the 1st week we got there,

318
00:11:18,930 --> 00:11:20,610
oh, my smash is so bad. We could

319
00:11:20,610 --> 00:11:22,690
tell stories all night about it, but we

320
00:11:22,690 --> 00:11:24,529
had nothing about Latins because they couldn't get

321
00:11:24,529 --> 00:11:26,529
visas because of COVID and all kinds of

322
00:11:26,529 --> 00:11:27,730
things. And so we had this group of

323
00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:29,330
Latins, and I was out maybe 1 or

324
00:11:29,330 --> 00:11:29,990
2 weeks.

325
00:11:30,315 --> 00:11:32,075
And they're all in the office taking their

326
00:11:32,075 --> 00:11:34,415
pictures. They're there for the first time, and

327
00:11:34,794 --> 00:11:37,054
they're so serious and scared. And

328
00:11:37,355 --> 00:11:38,495
I wanted to say

329
00:11:39,035 --> 00:11:41,695
more smiles or, you know, smile more.

330
00:11:42,075 --> 00:11:44,075
And I don't know why, but for some

331
00:11:44,075 --> 00:11:45,539
reason, instead of saying mas

332
00:11:46,419 --> 00:11:47,240
sonrisas, I said

333
00:11:48,179 --> 00:11:48,679
cervezas.

334
00:11:50,419 --> 00:11:51,539
Some of you know what that I got

335
00:11:51,539 --> 00:11:52,820
a I got a smile out of him,

336
00:11:52,820 --> 00:11:54,339
so that was good. I think most English

337
00:11:54,339 --> 00:11:56,659
speaking people know what cervezas is. But for

338
00:11:56,659 --> 00:11:58,339
3 years, every time we took pictures, the

339
00:11:58,339 --> 00:12:00,740
missionaries would yell, cervezas. I'm like, no. We

340
00:12:00,740 --> 00:12:02,674
got general authority here. You can't say that.

341
00:12:04,415 --> 00:12:06,575
So so, yeah, that that was my Spanish

342
00:12:06,575 --> 00:12:08,894
and kept me very humble. And for those

343
00:12:08,894 --> 00:12:10,735
that aren't following on, that means more beer

344
00:12:10,894 --> 00:12:13,529
Yes. Just for Yes. Thank you. Nice. I

345
00:12:13,690 --> 00:12:15,210
wanna take more Laurie, would you mind standing

346
00:12:15,210 --> 00:12:17,610
up? Just recognize sister Farrell in the room

347
00:12:17,610 --> 00:12:18,590
here. So

348
00:12:20,330 --> 00:12:21,629
now for the record,

349
00:12:22,410 --> 00:12:24,009
I gave them the opportunity to make this

350
00:12:24,009 --> 00:12:26,889
a couple's interview, but Laurie is is deep

351
00:12:26,889 --> 00:12:27,389
into,

352
00:12:28,274 --> 00:12:30,434
she's back in school at BYU. Yeah. And

353
00:12:30,434 --> 00:12:30,934
so

354
00:12:31,394 --> 00:12:33,475
this was one less thing she needed to

355
00:12:33,475 --> 00:12:35,415
worry about, and that is just fine. So

356
00:12:35,634 --> 00:12:37,475
I'm I'm glad that that you're here and

357
00:12:37,475 --> 00:12:38,934
and and sharing in this. So

358
00:12:39,315 --> 00:12:41,495
alright. So you enter the MTC.

359
00:12:41,879 --> 00:12:44,440
Do you have a they the mission leader

360
00:12:44,440 --> 00:12:46,440
seminar. They change the name every so often.

361
00:12:46,440 --> 00:12:48,600
So about 3 or 4 days, you're there

362
00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:50,320
at the MTC. We didn't have that because

363
00:12:50,320 --> 00:12:51,799
it was COVID. So we Oh, you didn't?

364
00:12:51,799 --> 00:12:54,360
Okay. Peru. Yeah. That's right. So it was

365
00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:56,360
right into that. It was it was broadcast,

366
00:12:56,360 --> 00:12:58,274
but we didn't have it live. So and

367
00:12:58,274 --> 00:12:59,574
this is in the I

368
00:12:59,954 --> 00:13:01,554
mean, we're coming out of COVID, I guess.

369
00:13:01,554 --> 00:13:02,054
2021.

370
00:13:03,314 --> 00:13:03,814
So

371
00:13:04,194 --> 00:13:05,334
June of 2021,

372
00:13:05,794 --> 00:13:07,475
and Peru is about a year behind in

373
00:13:07,475 --> 00:13:07,975
COVID.

374
00:13:08,690 --> 00:13:11,269
There are more deaths per capita in Lima

375
00:13:11,490 --> 00:13:13,409
than there was anywhere in the world. Wow.

376
00:13:13,409 --> 00:13:15,809
So it really hit Peru hard. So we

377
00:13:15,809 --> 00:13:17,329
were about a year behind. When we got

378
00:13:17,329 --> 00:13:18,789
to the mission, we were masked.

379
00:13:19,250 --> 00:13:20,470
The plastic shields,

380
00:13:20,945 --> 00:13:23,504
Missionaries couldn't go into people's homes, so we

381
00:13:23,504 --> 00:13:26,164
are still very much in COVID. Yeah. Yeah.

382
00:13:26,544 --> 00:13:28,784
Anything else as far as explain just the

383
00:13:28,784 --> 00:13:31,284
scenario you walked into because so you watched

384
00:13:31,424 --> 00:13:33,365
all that training online virtually,

385
00:13:33,750 --> 00:13:35,990
and then you get on a plane. Was

386
00:13:35,990 --> 00:13:37,610
it hard to get in the country? Or

387
00:13:38,070 --> 00:13:40,070
Yeah. They called us in May and said

388
00:13:40,149 --> 00:13:42,070
because they're just little windows that were opening

389
00:13:42,070 --> 00:13:43,830
up, and they and you don't wanna have

390
00:13:43,830 --> 00:13:45,590
a general authority call you up and say

391
00:13:45,590 --> 00:13:47,129
this question to you. He said,

392
00:13:47,554 --> 00:13:49,654
this is not a question of your consecration.

393
00:13:50,194 --> 00:13:52,375
You don't lead the question with that. Right?

394
00:13:52,514 --> 00:13:53,794
I I said, okay. What are you gonna

395
00:13:53,794 --> 00:13:55,475
ask me next? He said, we have these

396
00:13:55,475 --> 00:13:57,074
little windows to get you into Peru. Can

397
00:13:57,074 --> 00:13:59,254
you leave in May to go to Peru?

398
00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:01,759
I said, well, I've got a daughter getting

399
00:14:01,759 --> 00:14:03,440
home from her mission the week before we

400
00:14:03,440 --> 00:14:05,440
leave and a son getting married the week

401
00:14:05,440 --> 00:14:06,899
before we leave. Wow.

402
00:14:07,279 --> 00:14:09,200
He says, okay. We won't we we won't

403
00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:09,860
do that.

404
00:14:10,559 --> 00:14:11,540
Nice. Nice.

405
00:14:11,875 --> 00:14:13,475
Now and so you had I mean, you

406
00:14:13,475 --> 00:14:14,915
had kids still at home. You were empty

407
00:14:14,915 --> 00:14:16,995
nesters going on. We had a 10 year

408
00:14:16,995 --> 00:14:18,274
old and a 13 year old that went

409
00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:20,055
with us and a senior in high school

410
00:14:20,195 --> 00:14:22,455
that spent her senior year online

411
00:14:23,075 --> 00:14:25,210
in Peru. Wow. And I'm sure if she

412
00:14:25,210 --> 00:14:27,049
was here, maybe she'd still be online, I

413
00:14:27,049 --> 00:14:28,190
don't know, with COVID.

414
00:14:28,889 --> 00:14:30,090
But so what was that like? How do

415
00:14:30,090 --> 00:14:32,410
you prepare your young family for this experience?

416
00:14:32,410 --> 00:14:34,970
I mean, it's an adventure, and it's it's

417
00:14:34,970 --> 00:14:37,610
gonna create memories. So there's some benefits to

418
00:14:37,610 --> 00:14:40,504
it, but it's also disruptive to their developmental

419
00:14:41,045 --> 00:14:43,304
years. Yeah. I think for our kids,

420
00:14:43,605 --> 00:14:45,785
you know, no one asked them to go.

421
00:14:45,924 --> 00:14:47,144
They don't get the calling.

422
00:14:47,764 --> 00:14:49,285
No one said, do you wanna do this

423
00:14:49,285 --> 00:14:51,205
or not? They just go with mom and

424
00:14:51,205 --> 00:14:51,705
dad,

425
00:14:52,049 --> 00:14:52,549
and,

426
00:14:53,409 --> 00:14:56,129
that's huge. Yeah. And for a 10 and

427
00:14:56,129 --> 00:14:57,269
a 13 year old.

428
00:14:57,649 --> 00:14:58,149
So,

429
00:14:58,850 --> 00:15:00,529
yeah, it was a hard it was hard

430
00:15:00,529 --> 00:15:01,990
emotionally for them. But,

431
00:15:02,370 --> 00:15:04,424
Laurie, it was hard for her because she's

432
00:15:04,584 --> 00:15:06,825
mission mom and mom, and she did a

433
00:15:06,825 --> 00:15:09,304
great job balancing that. And she really helped

434
00:15:09,304 --> 00:15:11,004
our children adjust very well.

435
00:15:11,384 --> 00:15:12,445
So we

436
00:15:13,384 --> 00:15:14,044
our kids,

437
00:15:14,584 --> 00:15:16,345
I can't believe how well they did. They

438
00:15:16,345 --> 00:15:18,639
really thrived to improve. I think our kids

439
00:15:18,639 --> 00:15:20,480
back home struggled more than our kids that

440
00:15:20,480 --> 00:15:21,300
were with us.

441
00:15:21,759 --> 00:15:23,519
And these are your adult kids. They're sort

442
00:15:23,519 --> 00:15:25,120
of on their own. Yeah. Yeah. Just that

443
00:15:25,120 --> 00:15:27,519
having that connection to home, and home is

444
00:15:27,519 --> 00:15:29,279
now 4,000 miles away. Right? At least mom

445
00:15:29,279 --> 00:15:31,735
and dad are. Right? Yeah. So and these

446
00:15:31,735 --> 00:15:34,295
are real scenarios that families you know, there's

447
00:15:34,295 --> 00:15:36,695
always something, right, that, that's gonna be a

448
00:15:36,695 --> 00:15:38,855
little awkward or but it is what it

449
00:15:38,855 --> 00:15:39,595
is. So

450
00:15:39,975 --> 00:15:42,134
so you you make in Peru, and, obviously,

451
00:15:42,134 --> 00:15:44,879
there's there's COVID. Now this maybe just explain,

452
00:15:44,879 --> 00:15:47,040
like, the demographics because this, I thought, was

453
00:15:47,040 --> 00:15:48,340
interesting of the

454
00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:51,220
Lima Peru central mission. Is that right?

455
00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:53,440
How's that made up? So they just created

456
00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:56,019
a 7th mission in Lima, the largest city

457
00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,759
with the most or the city with the

458
00:15:57,759 --> 00:16:00,074
most missions in the world. So we have

459
00:16:00,074 --> 00:16:02,414
just a very small sliver of Lima.

460
00:16:02,794 --> 00:16:04,714
Our mission was about 10 by 10 miles.

461
00:16:04,714 --> 00:16:06,954
So if you know Morgan County, it's the

462
00:16:06,954 --> 00:16:09,034
size of Morgan County, and you would put

463
00:16:09,034 --> 00:16:11,754
the entire population of Utah in Morgan County.

464
00:16:11,754 --> 00:16:13,695
Wow. We had 3 and a half 1000000

465
00:16:13,754 --> 00:16:14,254
people

466
00:16:14,669 --> 00:16:16,909
living in a 10 by 10 miles. So

467
00:16:16,909 --> 00:16:18,990
it's just stacked on top of each other.

468
00:16:18,990 --> 00:16:20,750
Yeah. And then at that time, they had

469
00:16:20,750 --> 00:16:21,570
6 missions,

470
00:16:21,950 --> 00:16:24,029
and the church is very strong in Peru.

471
00:16:24,029 --> 00:16:26,589
We had 8 stakes in our 10 by

472
00:16:26,589 --> 00:16:27,409
10 miles.

473
00:16:27,804 --> 00:16:29,825
We had 47 wards,

474
00:16:30,605 --> 00:16:31,825
30,000 members,

475
00:16:32,365 --> 00:16:33,904
and we had about an 18%

476
00:16:34,285 --> 00:16:37,325
activity rate. And people think, oh my goodness,

477
00:16:37,325 --> 00:16:39,825
that's terrible. But I was the stake president

478
00:16:39,884 --> 00:16:42,649
in Northern Utah and our activity rate in

479
00:16:42,649 --> 00:16:44,330
that stake in the heart of the church

480
00:16:44,330 --> 00:16:45,149
was 23%.

481
00:16:47,370 --> 00:16:50,330
So it's challenge across the board. Yeah. Yeah.

482
00:16:50,330 --> 00:16:52,350
Anything you say just about Peru in general

483
00:16:52,409 --> 00:16:54,649
in relation to the church with anything else

484
00:16:54,649 --> 00:16:56,774
to add there to understand the, you know,

485
00:16:56,774 --> 00:16:59,014
how to be a missionary there? Yeah. I'll

486
00:16:59,014 --> 00:17:01,095
tell you. There is something special. Many of

487
00:17:01,095 --> 00:17:03,254
the apostles have been to Peru. It's of

488
00:17:03,254 --> 00:17:03,754
good

489
00:17:04,134 --> 00:17:06,294
they were the area offices for a large

490
00:17:06,294 --> 00:17:08,634
part of South America. And

491
00:17:09,049 --> 00:17:11,690
there is a different feeling with Peru. The

492
00:17:11,690 --> 00:17:13,789
the church is progressing very quickly,

493
00:17:14,329 --> 00:17:16,669
and they're just very humble people, very teachable

494
00:17:16,730 --> 00:17:17,230
people.

495
00:17:17,690 --> 00:17:20,409
And it's sad. It's a country where you

496
00:17:20,409 --> 00:17:22,970
can talk about Jesus at any time to

497
00:17:22,970 --> 00:17:25,424
anybody at any place. You can't do that

498
00:17:25,424 --> 00:17:26,644
here. Mhmm.

499
00:17:26,944 --> 00:17:28,464
I have missionaries that get on the bus

500
00:17:28,464 --> 00:17:29,585
and they stand up in the bus and

501
00:17:29,585 --> 00:17:31,105
they just start preaching the gospel on the

502
00:17:31,105 --> 00:17:32,865
bus. You know, can you imagine if somebody

503
00:17:32,865 --> 00:17:33,605
did that

504
00:17:33,984 --> 00:17:35,444
on the subway in New York?

505
00:17:36,144 --> 00:17:36,865
Yeah. So

506
00:17:38,089 --> 00:17:38,589
nice.

507
00:17:38,890 --> 00:17:40,890
And you so it was a very urban

508
00:17:40,890 --> 00:17:41,710
area then?

509
00:17:42,009 --> 00:17:45,210
Oh, yeah. Like city, just dense population. You've

510
00:17:45,210 --> 00:17:47,289
never seen traffic like this. Matter of fact,

511
00:17:47,289 --> 00:17:49,930
I had special permission from the area president

512
00:17:49,930 --> 00:17:50,430
that

513
00:17:50,845 --> 00:17:52,605
when I was driving, I was allowed to

514
00:17:52,605 --> 00:17:54,785
swear while driving it. Oh, really? Wow.

515
00:17:55,085 --> 00:17:56,765
As long as there were no missionaries in

516
00:17:56,765 --> 00:17:58,365
the car. Okay. Alright. So every once in

517
00:17:58,365 --> 00:17:59,485
a while, I just tell the missionaries, can

518
00:17:59,485 --> 00:18:00,765
you please get out for a minute? And

519
00:18:00,765 --> 00:18:02,525
then I just, you know, swear, you know,

520
00:18:02,525 --> 00:18:03,779
invite him back in the car.

521
00:18:04,259 --> 00:18:05,240
So love it.

522
00:18:05,619 --> 00:18:07,940
And you lived, you lived outside of your

523
00:18:07,940 --> 00:18:10,440
mission in a building with other mission presidents.

524
00:18:10,500 --> 00:18:12,180
Yeah. 3. So I just lived in the

525
00:18:12,180 --> 00:18:14,340
same building. So how great was that? Wow.

526
00:18:14,340 --> 00:18:16,180
So power is so great. They taught us

527
00:18:16,180 --> 00:18:17,875
so much. And you see each other coming

528
00:18:17,875 --> 00:18:19,474
and going. And Yeah. Some days you come

529
00:18:19,474 --> 00:18:21,075
home crying, and they hug you. Other days,

530
00:18:21,075 --> 00:18:22,355
it's not coming. Door. And how do you

531
00:18:22,355 --> 00:18:23,474
do this? And how do you do that?

532
00:18:23,474 --> 00:18:25,795
And it was very, very powerful. Nice. That's

533
00:18:25,795 --> 00:18:27,015
awesome. That's cool.

534
00:18:27,315 --> 00:18:28,835
What do you remember just from that? Just

535
00:18:28,835 --> 00:18:30,595
walking in the mission, I appreciate that story

536
00:18:30,595 --> 00:18:33,390
of a missionary sort of helping you refocus

537
00:18:33,929 --> 00:18:35,309
on preach my gospel.

538
00:18:35,849 --> 00:18:37,230
Anything else about just

539
00:18:37,529 --> 00:18:39,769
finding your feet in this calling as a

540
00:18:39,769 --> 00:18:40,509
mission president

541
00:18:40,890 --> 00:18:41,710
in the beginning?

542
00:18:42,089 --> 00:18:42,589
Yeah.

543
00:18:43,049 --> 00:18:44,650
I learned this before. I had I think

544
00:18:44,650 --> 00:18:46,169
I had a real advantage to be in

545
00:18:46,169 --> 00:18:47,609
the young adult world for as long as

546
00:18:47,609 --> 00:18:49,174
I had before I served.

547
00:18:50,034 --> 00:18:52,034
It really helped me, I think, see some

548
00:18:52,034 --> 00:18:53,734
things with the young adults that

549
00:18:54,115 --> 00:18:55,875
maybe some other mission presence I had had

550
00:18:55,875 --> 00:18:57,355
that experience. It just take a little longer

551
00:18:57,355 --> 00:18:58,294
to see that.

552
00:18:58,914 --> 00:19:00,914
But I quickly realized that,

553
00:19:01,549 --> 00:19:03,230
my focus need to really be, of course,

554
00:19:03,230 --> 00:19:04,990
preach my gospel, but it had to be

555
00:19:04,990 --> 00:19:07,250
about helping them connect with Jesus Christ.

556
00:19:07,630 --> 00:19:09,150
And how do we use the doctrine of

557
00:19:09,150 --> 00:19:11,230
the gospel of Jesus Christ to truly, not

558
00:19:11,230 --> 00:19:13,730
just talk about it, but truly connect

559
00:19:14,029 --> 00:19:16,644
these missionaries to Jesus Christ. And that was

560
00:19:16,644 --> 00:19:18,964
a very important thing. We had a mission

561
00:19:18,964 --> 00:19:20,724
miracle. I should have one of my missionaries

562
00:19:20,724 --> 00:19:21,384
share it.

563
00:19:21,765 --> 00:19:23,525
That is the miracle of the man with

564
00:19:23,525 --> 00:19:24,025
palsy

565
00:19:24,724 --> 00:19:26,484
that's carried up on the roof and lower

566
00:19:26,484 --> 00:19:27,224
down. Right.

567
00:19:27,605 --> 00:19:29,625
And that was our mission miracle because

568
00:19:30,009 --> 00:19:32,009
you have to have the experience in the

569
00:19:32,009 --> 00:19:32,509
bed

570
00:19:33,049 --> 00:19:35,210
and before you get on the roof. And

571
00:19:35,210 --> 00:19:38,089
most missionaries go out, and they're trying to

572
00:19:38,089 --> 00:19:40,250
get on the roof to be missionaries, to

573
00:19:40,250 --> 00:19:42,569
carry people to Christ, but they haven't had

574
00:19:42,569 --> 00:19:44,190
their own personal experience

575
00:19:44,490 --> 00:19:46,744
with Jesus Christ. And so

576
00:19:47,125 --> 00:19:49,605
they're they're at obligation or pressure or their

577
00:19:49,605 --> 00:19:50,744
heart's not in it.

578
00:19:51,125 --> 00:19:54,085
So it's that that sweet balance of helping

579
00:19:54,085 --> 00:19:56,404
them have that personal experience with Jesus Christ.

580
00:19:56,404 --> 00:19:57,625
Because when that happens,

581
00:19:57,940 --> 00:19:59,700
boy, you don't have to tell them to

582
00:19:59,700 --> 00:20:00,980
get on the roof. They wanna be on

583
00:20:00,980 --> 00:20:02,660
the roof. Then they're on the roof and

584
00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:04,440
they see other people coming to Christ,

585
00:20:04,900 --> 00:20:07,000
and they see the miracle of the gospel

586
00:20:07,059 --> 00:20:09,220
occurring in other people's lives. And they realize

587
00:20:09,220 --> 00:20:10,740
I need more of that, and they're back

588
00:20:10,740 --> 00:20:12,384
in the bed. And you're in the bed,

589
00:20:12,384 --> 00:20:13,625
and you're on the roof, and you're on

590
00:20:13,744 --> 00:20:15,105
in the bed and on the roof. And

591
00:20:15,105 --> 00:20:17,744
that's discipleship. That's how we should constantly be

592
00:20:17,744 --> 00:20:20,305
living our lives. Right? And so that was

593
00:20:20,305 --> 00:20:22,545
a that was a very prominent message that

594
00:20:22,545 --> 00:20:23,924
we had in our mission.

595
00:20:24,289 --> 00:20:26,609
I think sometimes missions, we tend to focus

596
00:20:26,609 --> 00:20:28,289
too much on the mechanics of being a

597
00:20:28,289 --> 00:20:28,789
missionary.

598
00:20:29,089 --> 00:20:31,569
Right? You all heard about the numbers and

599
00:20:31,569 --> 00:20:33,329
all of that kind of stuff. That's important.

600
00:20:33,329 --> 00:20:35,890
We gotta do that. But if it's not

601
00:20:35,890 --> 00:20:37,190
coupled and balanced

602
00:20:37,490 --> 00:20:39,669
equally with the relationship with Christ,

603
00:20:39,970 --> 00:20:41,394
you get a lot of missionaries that come

604
00:20:41,394 --> 00:20:42,994
home and then don't stay faithful to the

605
00:20:42,994 --> 00:20:43,894
gospel because,

606
00:20:44,195 --> 00:20:46,275
you know, you look at I don't know

607
00:20:46,275 --> 00:20:47,015
the statistics.

608
00:20:47,555 --> 00:20:48,994
I've seen some things, but if I had

609
00:20:48,994 --> 00:20:49,654
to guess,

610
00:20:49,955 --> 00:20:51,015
probably about 30%

611
00:20:51,315 --> 00:20:53,174
of return missionaries are inactive

612
00:20:53,555 --> 00:20:55,980
upon returning home from their missions. And in

613
00:20:55,980 --> 00:20:59,039
South America, it's between 50 to 60%.

614
00:21:00,380 --> 00:21:00,880
So

615
00:21:01,339 --> 00:21:03,180
I will take that and tell you I

616
00:21:03,180 --> 00:21:06,000
personally believe that a huge portion of that

617
00:21:06,700 --> 00:21:08,640
is on the shoulders of mission presence

618
00:21:09,345 --> 00:21:10,565
because we're not

619
00:21:11,025 --> 00:21:13,924
connecting them to Christ and preparing them for

620
00:21:14,144 --> 00:21:15,845
what happens after the mission.

621
00:21:16,224 --> 00:21:18,544
And so we get so focused on the

622
00:21:18,544 --> 00:21:20,384
mechanics of teaching the gospel, and that's great.

623
00:21:20,384 --> 00:21:22,619
And they learn things, and they, you know,

624
00:21:22,619 --> 00:21:25,340
expand their knowledge, but nothing happens or as

625
00:21:25,340 --> 00:21:27,660
much happens here as should, and they go

626
00:21:27,660 --> 00:21:30,000
back to the world and it's hard. And

627
00:21:30,779 --> 00:21:32,940
stuff. It's you know, I it's hard for

628
00:21:32,940 --> 00:21:33,759
me. I

629
00:21:34,059 --> 00:21:36,160
I almost canceled doing this podcast.

630
00:21:37,005 --> 00:21:37,505
I

631
00:21:38,204 --> 00:21:40,305
am speaking of education week in August.

632
00:21:40,684 --> 00:21:42,065
I almost canceled that,

633
00:21:42,445 --> 00:21:42,945
because

634
00:21:43,805 --> 00:21:46,365
that same percentage of 30% is happening in

635
00:21:46,365 --> 00:21:47,265
my own family.

636
00:21:47,805 --> 00:21:50,224
So I've got children who are walking away.

637
00:21:50,419 --> 00:21:52,900
I have wonderful, great children. I love them.

638
00:21:52,900 --> 00:21:55,159
They're they're doing incredible things with their lives.

639
00:21:55,619 --> 00:21:56,119
But

640
00:21:56,500 --> 00:21:57,779
it's hard. It's hard not to feel like

641
00:21:57,779 --> 00:22:00,039
a hypocrite. It's hard to not feel like,

642
00:22:00,339 --> 00:22:02,419
you know, what have I done wrong? And

643
00:22:02,419 --> 00:22:04,585
have the contention as a parent or as

644
00:22:04,585 --> 00:22:06,505
a leader, and then here I am in

645
00:22:06,505 --> 00:22:08,045
front of you and doing this podcast.

646
00:22:08,664 --> 00:22:10,265
You know, it's we gotta do we're all

647
00:22:10,265 --> 00:22:12,345
in this together. We gotta figure out how

648
00:22:12,345 --> 00:22:14,684
to help people connect with Jesus Christ.

649
00:22:15,144 --> 00:22:16,605
Not just these young adults.

650
00:22:16,970 --> 00:22:19,549
A lot of us have struggled with that.

651
00:22:19,849 --> 00:22:22,009
Yeah. Yeah. That was probably the main takeaway,

652
00:22:22,009 --> 00:22:24,490
I think. Yeah. And this is why this

653
00:22:24,490 --> 00:22:27,130
audience is so endearing towards you is that

654
00:22:27,130 --> 00:22:28,490
not because you're the leader that has it

655
00:22:28,490 --> 00:22:30,570
all figured out, but you're the leader that's

656
00:22:30,570 --> 00:22:32,325
willing to be real and say, this is

657
00:22:32,404 --> 00:22:33,764
this is what I feel and this is

658
00:22:33,764 --> 00:22:35,524
we gotta change something about it. And you

659
00:22:35,524 --> 00:22:38,424
have a wonderful way of rallying that effort

660
00:22:38,644 --> 00:22:40,244
to do that. So I appreciate being here

661
00:22:40,244 --> 00:22:42,024
and being being open about that.

662
00:22:42,325 --> 00:22:44,565
So, I mean, I think all of us,

663
00:22:44,565 --> 00:22:46,804
like, we hear that. We think, yeah, we

664
00:22:46,804 --> 00:22:48,549
need to do that. And then we kinda

665
00:22:48,549 --> 00:22:50,410
show up Sunday morning, like, like,

666
00:22:51,029 --> 00:22:52,549
how do I do that? So, like, what

667
00:22:52,549 --> 00:22:53,910
are some things you try? Like, when a

668
00:22:53,910 --> 00:22:56,230
new missionary walks in, and maybe he's in

669
00:22:56,230 --> 00:22:58,390
that contention that you've talked about in previous

670
00:22:58,390 --> 00:22:59,289
episodes where

671
00:22:59,590 --> 00:23:01,590
he just misunderstood he's being consumed by the

672
00:23:01,590 --> 00:23:03,404
shame of it or thinks I if I

673
00:23:03,404 --> 00:23:04,465
just try harder,

674
00:23:04,845 --> 00:23:06,684
then it'll start to click in. Right? And

675
00:23:06,684 --> 00:23:09,005
so how do you shift somebody to and

676
00:23:09,005 --> 00:23:11,245
create a culture that that that does not

677
00:23:11,245 --> 00:23:13,005
saying that you did it perfectly or dialed

678
00:23:13,005 --> 00:23:14,684
in, but what what did your effort look

679
00:23:14,684 --> 00:23:17,059
like there? Yeah. Just to clarify, I

680
00:23:17,519 --> 00:23:19,119
I don't have all the answers. I'm no

681
00:23:19,119 --> 00:23:21,700
expert. Other Irene has said that

682
00:23:22,319 --> 00:23:24,559
once how's the quote go? We had it

683
00:23:24,559 --> 00:23:26,740
stapled to our door in our house.

684
00:23:27,039 --> 00:23:28,640
Once you think you have it all figured

685
00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:29,140
out,

686
00:23:29,494 --> 00:23:31,674
you've lost your usefulness to the Lord.

687
00:23:32,455 --> 00:23:34,134
And I can testify to you, I am

688
00:23:34,134 --> 00:23:36,775
one useful servant to the Lord because I

689
00:23:36,775 --> 00:23:38,615
don't have it figured out, and I'm trying

690
00:23:38,615 --> 00:23:40,215
to just learn and grow. Yeah. I love

691
00:23:40,215 --> 00:23:42,134
that. And so that's what we did, actually.

692
00:23:42,134 --> 00:23:44,399
We learned from our failures, and I I

693
00:23:44,399 --> 00:23:45,779
tried to create a culture

694
00:23:46,079 --> 00:23:48,740
that is okay to fail. My son, Elijah,

695
00:23:49,039 --> 00:23:51,839
is he just taught me something, last week,

696
00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:54,159
that happened in World War 2, which I

697
00:23:54,159 --> 00:23:55,599
think this is kind of the root of

698
00:23:55,599 --> 00:23:57,619
the problem that we're not maybe addressing.

699
00:23:58,255 --> 00:23:59,554
In World War 2,

700
00:24:00,015 --> 00:24:02,674
England was just getting all kinds of their,

701
00:24:02,974 --> 00:24:04,815
their planes shot out of the sky and

702
00:24:04,815 --> 00:24:05,714
losing many

703
00:24:06,015 --> 00:24:07,554
soldiers, and so

704
00:24:07,855 --> 00:24:09,214
they try to figure out what they could

705
00:24:09,214 --> 00:24:10,914
do. So the planes that survived

706
00:24:11,214 --> 00:24:12,275
would come into

707
00:24:12,929 --> 00:24:13,589
the airport,

708
00:24:13,970 --> 00:24:16,210
and wherever the bullet holes were, they would

709
00:24:16,210 --> 00:24:19,009
reinforce those sections of the plane to put

710
00:24:19,009 --> 00:24:21,509
thicker armor and try to protect those planes.

711
00:24:21,889 --> 00:24:24,210
And they found that the loss of planes,

712
00:24:24,210 --> 00:24:26,309
the loss of soldiers wasn't really changing.

713
00:24:26,954 --> 00:24:28,954
And so they brought this guy in. His

714
00:24:28,954 --> 00:24:30,575
name is Abraham Wald,

715
00:24:30,954 --> 00:24:32,794
and they brought him in to evaluate it.

716
00:24:32,794 --> 00:24:35,115
And he said, you're looking at the wrong

717
00:24:35,115 --> 00:24:35,615
thing.

718
00:24:36,075 --> 00:24:37,755
He calls it I've never heard this before.

719
00:24:37,755 --> 00:24:39,034
Maybe some of you have heard this. He

720
00:24:39,034 --> 00:24:40,095
calls it survivorship

721
00:24:40,714 --> 00:24:41,214
biased.

722
00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:44,000
So you're talking to the people that have

723
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:44,500
survived.

724
00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:48,000
You're not talking to the failures. You're not

725
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:50,160
talking to the planes that crashed. So he

726
00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:52,420
came in and he said, instead of reinforcing

727
00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:53,619
where the bullets are,

728
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:56,820
reinforce where the bullets didn't hit the plane.

729
00:24:57,345 --> 00:24:59,525
Because the ones that are coming in

730
00:25:00,224 --> 00:25:02,325
and they have bullet holes, they're surviving.

731
00:25:02,865 --> 00:25:05,585
So they reinforced where the the bullets of

732
00:25:05,585 --> 00:25:08,404
the surviving planes were not being hit and

733
00:25:09,025 --> 00:25:11,025
radically changed the number of planes and the

734
00:25:11,025 --> 00:25:12,724
number of survivals they had.

735
00:25:13,079 --> 00:25:15,720
And I don't think we do that very

736
00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:16,220
well.

737
00:25:16,759 --> 00:25:19,240
I think sometimes when people are walking away

738
00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:20,460
from the gospel,

739
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:23,159
we can kind of maybe shame them. We

740
00:25:23,159 --> 00:25:24,460
can isolate them.

741
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:27,799
We can judge them instead of learning from

742
00:25:27,799 --> 00:25:28,299
them.

743
00:25:28,625 --> 00:25:30,305
And I think that's the culture we have

744
00:25:30,305 --> 00:25:31,345
to have. I I would talk to my

745
00:25:31,345 --> 00:25:33,825
missionaries often about how do you lose the

746
00:25:33,825 --> 00:25:35,285
confidence of Jesus Christ?

747
00:25:35,904 --> 00:25:37,664
And because I have missionaries, I'm sure some

748
00:25:37,664 --> 00:25:39,505
of you feel this way. They're progressing. They're

749
00:25:39,505 --> 00:25:41,585
growing. Then they do something stupid, or they

750
00:25:41,585 --> 00:25:43,585
have a challenge or something hard happens in

751
00:25:43,585 --> 00:25:45,769
life, and they feel, I've lost the confidence

752
00:25:45,769 --> 00:25:47,630
of Christ. I gotta start all over again.

753
00:25:47,690 --> 00:25:48,970
So, yeah, how do you reinforce it? How

754
00:25:48,970 --> 00:25:50,569
do you yeah. So we we think we're

755
00:25:50,569 --> 00:25:52,890
building this confidence Jesus Christ has in us,

756
00:25:52,890 --> 00:25:54,970
and then we have trials, we have challenges,

757
00:25:54,970 --> 00:25:57,224
we commit sin, we do something wrong, we

758
00:25:57,224 --> 00:25:58,585
lose that confidence, we have to start all

759
00:25:58,585 --> 00:25:59,704
over again. I think a lot of people

760
00:25:59,704 --> 00:26:02,505
feel that way. And so, you know, how

761
00:26:02,505 --> 00:26:05,325
do we gain the confidence of Jesus Christ?

762
00:26:05,944 --> 00:26:08,184
And my missionaries oftentimes would say, well, I

763
00:26:08,184 --> 00:26:09,944
gotta be obedient, or I gotta do this

764
00:26:09,944 --> 00:26:11,625
or that. And, of course, those things are

765
00:26:11,625 --> 00:26:13,580
true, but you're not ever going to be

766
00:26:13,580 --> 00:26:14,480
perfectly obedient.

767
00:26:14,940 --> 00:26:16,380
Matter of fact, there's a line in the

768
00:26:16,380 --> 00:26:18,700
temple. Of course, we'll be careful with that,

769
00:26:18,700 --> 00:26:21,100
that where Satan is talking and gives his

770
00:26:21,100 --> 00:26:22,960
definition of what it means to be worthy.

771
00:26:23,259 --> 00:26:25,019
And I love the addition that's been made

772
00:26:25,019 --> 00:26:26,619
in the temple because it's quick to have

773
00:26:26,619 --> 00:26:28,484
Peter Wright stand right up and say, but

774
00:26:28,484 --> 00:26:30,325
you can repent and you can get back

775
00:26:30,325 --> 00:26:32,184
on your feet. Right? So

776
00:26:32,724 --> 00:26:35,224
how do we gain confidence in Jesus Christ?

777
00:26:35,765 --> 00:26:37,845
It's not just through repentance. Of course, we

778
00:26:37,845 --> 00:26:39,845
have to do that, but I have to

779
00:26:39,845 --> 00:26:40,345
learn

780
00:26:40,644 --> 00:26:42,910
from my failure. I have to learn from

781
00:26:42,910 --> 00:26:44,509
my sin. I have to learn from my

782
00:26:44,509 --> 00:26:45,009
mistake.

783
00:26:45,470 --> 00:26:46,690
If I do that,

784
00:26:47,070 --> 00:26:49,170
then I will not lose his confidence.

785
00:26:49,630 --> 00:26:51,309
He'll give me more opportunities to grow and

786
00:26:51,309 --> 00:26:53,470
more opportunities to grow. If I won't learn

787
00:26:53,470 --> 00:26:55,390
anything from that, then, yeah, I gotta start

788
00:26:55,390 --> 00:26:57,330
over again, and I'm gonna lose that confidence.

789
00:26:57,884 --> 00:26:59,805
So I think it's just simple things like

790
00:26:59,805 --> 00:27:02,205
that of these things that we do that

791
00:27:02,205 --> 00:27:04,545
just so quickly divide us from Jesus Christ.

792
00:27:05,005 --> 00:27:06,924
When in reality, these are things that should

793
00:27:06,924 --> 00:27:08,625
be connecting us to Jesus Christ.

794
00:27:08,924 --> 00:27:11,005
My failure should connect me to Jesus Christ

795
00:27:11,005 --> 00:27:12,705
if I can use it as an opportunity

796
00:27:12,765 --> 00:27:13,505
to learn.

797
00:27:14,019 --> 00:27:16,119
And, man, we sin really well.

798
00:27:16,420 --> 00:27:18,359
We repent muscle manos.

799
00:27:18,980 --> 00:27:20,279
So so, and

800
00:27:20,900 --> 00:27:23,140
we don't learn very well. Yeah. And so

801
00:27:23,140 --> 00:27:24,740
we get caught in these patterns of really

802
00:27:24,740 --> 00:27:25,480
not changing.

803
00:27:26,115 --> 00:27:28,835
So creating an environment there where it's okay

804
00:27:28,835 --> 00:27:30,214
to fail, and

805
00:27:30,515 --> 00:27:32,035
let's talk about that failure, and let's figure

806
00:27:32,035 --> 00:27:33,234
out how we can learn and grow from

807
00:27:33,234 --> 00:27:34,595
that. Yeah. And I think you shared with

808
00:27:34,595 --> 00:27:36,355
him. He wants sort of this, like, standing

809
00:27:36,355 --> 00:27:38,515
in his own conference and and communicating this,

810
00:27:38,515 --> 00:27:41,059
like, we want to see mistakes or failure.

811
00:27:41,059 --> 00:27:42,900
Like, how how did you frame that? What

812
00:27:42,900 --> 00:27:44,039
do you remember? Yeah.

813
00:27:44,340 --> 00:27:46,500
Yeah. Missionaries are surprising all the time. I'd

814
00:27:46,500 --> 00:27:48,360
say, I want a mission full of problems.

815
00:27:48,820 --> 00:27:50,420
And they would look at me like, what?

816
00:27:50,420 --> 00:27:51,860
I said, yeah. I want a mission full

817
00:27:51,860 --> 00:27:52,440
of problems.

818
00:27:52,740 --> 00:27:54,759
Because if this mission is full of problems,

819
00:27:55,195 --> 00:27:56,894
then you can trust me.

820
00:27:57,275 --> 00:27:59,515
You're talking about it. We know about it.

821
00:27:59,515 --> 00:28:01,434
We can deal with it. Right? We can

822
00:28:01,434 --> 00:28:02,575
overcome that.

823
00:28:02,955 --> 00:28:05,855
So yeah. Yeah. And this is the

824
00:28:06,234 --> 00:28:08,015
a tough place in leadership.

825
00:28:08,839 --> 00:28:10,200
Because you can sort of I guess, it

826
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:11,960
goes back to your plain analogy where you

827
00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:12,460
think,

828
00:28:12,759 --> 00:28:14,759
oh, nobody's setting up appointments with me as

829
00:28:14,759 --> 00:28:17,240
bishop. Things must be going pretty well. Right?

830
00:28:17,240 --> 00:28:18,759
Or Oh. I don't hear a lot of

831
00:28:18,759 --> 00:28:20,920
pornography issues in my ward. I think maybe

832
00:28:20,920 --> 00:28:22,279
that's not a thing in my ward. Or,

833
00:28:22,279 --> 00:28:24,255
you know, the list goes on. And then

834
00:28:24,255 --> 00:28:26,174
we can begin to believe that the problems

835
00:28:26,174 --> 00:28:27,234
don't exist. And

836
00:28:27,615 --> 00:28:29,775
so part of that is teasing those problems

837
00:28:29,775 --> 00:28:32,174
out, making a safe place for those problems

838
00:28:32,174 --> 00:28:33,934
to come up. Well, hopefully, I I was

839
00:28:33,934 --> 00:28:36,015
gonna share 5 things. My missionaries know I

840
00:28:36,015 --> 00:28:37,454
love the number 5, but I was gonna

841
00:28:37,454 --> 00:28:38,194
share 5

842
00:28:38,670 --> 00:28:40,190
principles that I and we can tie into

843
00:28:40,190 --> 00:28:41,650
one of those now. And that is

844
00:28:42,029 --> 00:28:42,529
time,

845
00:28:42,910 --> 00:28:43,410
training,

846
00:28:44,190 --> 00:28:44,690
team,

847
00:28:45,390 --> 00:28:45,890
traditions,

848
00:28:46,350 --> 00:28:47,170
and theology.

849
00:28:47,710 --> 00:28:50,110
And this comes into time. Yeah. I have

850
00:28:51,065 --> 00:28:52,825
and let me just back up and just

851
00:28:52,825 --> 00:28:53,805
maybe give some

852
00:28:54,825 --> 00:28:55,325
disclaimers.

853
00:28:55,944 --> 00:28:59,065
We have so many wonderful, great leaders in

854
00:28:59,065 --> 00:29:00,285
this church to get

855
00:29:00,744 --> 00:29:02,505
it. All of you are there. You're here.

856
00:29:02,505 --> 00:29:04,349
You're learning. You're trying to figure things out.

857
00:29:04,509 --> 00:29:06,669
We have incredible leaders that know how to

858
00:29:06,669 --> 00:29:08,849
connect with the youth and young adults.

859
00:29:09,309 --> 00:29:12,029
So as I speak in generalities and I

860
00:29:12,029 --> 00:29:12,769
give examples,

861
00:29:13,390 --> 00:29:15,490
please, I'm not trying to

862
00:29:15,869 --> 00:29:18,029
mock anybody or make fun of anybody or

863
00:29:18,029 --> 00:29:19,569
think I'm better than somebody

864
00:29:20,054 --> 00:29:22,315
or that all leaders are like this,

865
00:29:22,694 --> 00:29:24,634
but we have to be honest.

866
00:29:25,414 --> 00:29:28,794
We have some problems in leadership that's crushing

867
00:29:28,855 --> 00:29:31,414
and killing our young adults. And if we

868
00:29:31,414 --> 00:29:33,335
can't be honest about that and talk about

869
00:29:33,335 --> 00:29:36,019
that, then it's never gonna get better. You

870
00:29:36,019 --> 00:29:37,539
know, I I remember we had a mission

871
00:29:37,539 --> 00:29:38,759
president. He was new

872
00:29:39,139 --> 00:29:41,139
2, 3 months in the mission, and and

873
00:29:41,139 --> 00:29:42,899
we were meeting with him in a seminar,

874
00:29:42,899 --> 00:29:44,980
and and he was almost proud of the

875
00:29:44,980 --> 00:29:46,899
fact that he cleaned up the mission. He

876
00:29:46,899 --> 00:29:49,299
sent 15 missionaries home in his first 2

877
00:29:49,299 --> 00:29:51,319
or 3 mission 3 2 or 3 months.

878
00:29:51,694 --> 00:29:52,194
What?

879
00:29:52,815 --> 00:29:55,054
We have got to do better job at

880
00:29:55,054 --> 00:29:56,115
spending time

881
00:29:56,575 --> 00:29:58,994
with people because that's where you build

882
00:29:59,295 --> 00:30:01,775
the relationships and the trust and to pull

883
00:30:01,775 --> 00:30:04,190
out contention and to pull out, I'm okay

884
00:30:04,190 --> 00:30:05,710
to fail. I'm okay to have questions. I'm

885
00:30:05,710 --> 00:30:07,869
okay to have doubt. That takes time to

886
00:30:07,869 --> 00:30:10,589
do that, and we're not doing that. So

887
00:30:10,589 --> 00:30:12,430
when I have the mission president that I

888
00:30:12,430 --> 00:30:14,910
call because I'm constantly trying to learn from

889
00:30:14,910 --> 00:30:16,750
people, and I'll ask him, you know, how

890
00:30:16,750 --> 00:30:18,769
are you dealing with masturbation and your mission,

891
00:30:19,154 --> 00:30:20,434
and how big of a problem is in

892
00:30:20,434 --> 00:30:22,595
your mission? And he says, well, like you

893
00:30:22,595 --> 00:30:24,035
said, I don't have any of that in

894
00:30:24,035 --> 00:30:24,615
my mission.

895
00:30:24,994 --> 00:30:27,315
No. You creating an environment where you don't

896
00:30:27,315 --> 00:30:29,634
have time. I had a missionary that came

897
00:30:29,634 --> 00:30:31,795
in. I had the blessing of having a

898
00:30:31,795 --> 00:30:34,900
lot of reassigned missionaries. So it's very hard

899
00:30:34,900 --> 00:30:37,380
to get into Peru with visas. So hardly

900
00:30:37,380 --> 00:30:39,160
ever as you come right from the MTC

901
00:30:39,220 --> 00:30:39,799
to Peru.

902
00:30:40,100 --> 00:30:41,619
So the blessing of that is we have

903
00:30:41,619 --> 00:30:43,539
all these reassigned missionaries from all over the

904
00:30:43,539 --> 00:30:45,380
world that would come to our mission, and

905
00:30:45,380 --> 00:30:47,705
they had all these great ideas. We were

906
00:30:47,705 --> 00:30:49,705
constantly learning from their missions because they come

907
00:30:49,705 --> 00:30:51,144
in and, hey, we did this and we

908
00:30:51,144 --> 00:30:53,404
did that. It was awesome for our mission.

909
00:30:53,545 --> 00:30:54,744
But the other side of it too is

910
00:30:54,744 --> 00:30:55,705
you heard some of the things that were

911
00:30:55,705 --> 00:30:58,345
going on in other missions. And I just

912
00:30:58,345 --> 00:30:59,164
am surprised

913
00:30:59,545 --> 00:31:01,005
that we get so

914
00:31:01,384 --> 00:31:02,605
consumed with

915
00:31:02,990 --> 00:31:05,470
our time that we're not using the time

916
00:31:05,470 --> 00:31:07,710
to develop relationships. I had one missionary that

917
00:31:07,710 --> 00:31:10,430
came in his second interview with me, and

918
00:31:10,430 --> 00:31:12,430
he said, president, I was known as the

919
00:31:12,430 --> 00:31:13,410
2 minute missionary

920
00:31:13,869 --> 00:31:15,309
in his last mission. I said, what do

921
00:31:15,309 --> 00:31:17,154
you mean the 2 minute missionary? He said,

922
00:31:17,154 --> 00:31:18,434
I'd walk into my interview with the mission

923
00:31:18,434 --> 00:31:19,875
president, the mission president looked at me and

924
00:31:19,875 --> 00:31:22,275
he said, you're my 2 minute missionary. You

925
00:31:22,275 --> 00:31:23,875
don't have any problems, you're working hard, you're

926
00:31:23,875 --> 00:31:25,954
doing great, blah blah blah. Thanks. You know,

927
00:31:25,954 --> 00:31:26,934
let's be done.

928
00:31:27,315 --> 00:31:28,994
And he's been out 8, 9 months, and

929
00:31:28,994 --> 00:31:30,674
he breaks down and starts crying. He says,

930
00:31:30,674 --> 00:31:31,875
I got a I got a problem with

931
00:31:31,875 --> 00:31:32,375
masturbation.

932
00:31:32,809 --> 00:31:34,890
No one's talking to me. I'm not a

933
00:31:34,890 --> 00:31:36,890
gym leader missionary. I need someone to listen

934
00:31:36,890 --> 00:31:37,470
to me.

935
00:31:37,769 --> 00:31:39,609
So we have got to figure out how

936
00:31:39,609 --> 00:31:40,910
to have more time.

937
00:31:41,369 --> 00:31:42,910
The problem we have in the church,

938
00:31:43,369 --> 00:31:44,269
in our own families,

939
00:31:44,825 --> 00:31:46,924
is we spend so much time in administration

940
00:31:47,464 --> 00:31:49,644
that we don't have time to really minister.

941
00:31:50,345 --> 00:31:52,684
And and it's easy to do that because

942
00:31:53,305 --> 00:31:53,805
ministration

943
00:31:54,825 --> 00:31:57,305
Laurie would come in at 1 o'clock at

944
00:31:57,305 --> 00:31:59,625
night, and I'd be in my office working

945
00:31:59,625 --> 00:32:00,444
on transfers.

946
00:32:00,799 --> 00:32:02,400
And she's like, what are you doing? That's

947
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:04,079
not urgent. Why why are you doing that?

948
00:32:04,079 --> 00:32:05,200
Right? It's you know, you don't have to

949
00:32:05,200 --> 00:32:07,519
worry about that right now. It's because I

950
00:32:07,519 --> 00:32:08,980
had all this ministering

951
00:32:09,839 --> 00:32:12,179
that me going to administrating,

952
00:32:13,039 --> 00:32:15,200
I can control it. You know, I can

953
00:32:15,200 --> 00:32:16,965
organize it. It's

954
00:32:17,505 --> 00:32:19,505
easier. I would much rather be spending my

955
00:32:19,505 --> 00:32:20,725
time organizing,

956
00:32:21,265 --> 00:32:23,924
administrating than I would ministering because

957
00:32:24,305 --> 00:32:26,805
that ripped my heart out. That was emotional.

958
00:32:26,865 --> 00:32:28,705
That was hard. I don't know what I'm

959
00:32:28,705 --> 00:32:30,485
doing. I gotta figure things out.

960
00:32:31,025 --> 00:32:31,845
And so

961
00:32:32,279 --> 00:32:34,039
I see that as a real challenge, not

962
00:32:34,039 --> 00:32:35,880
just in the mission field. We have a

963
00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:36,779
real challenge

964
00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:39,259
in the church of

965
00:32:39,960 --> 00:32:42,779
spending time with people. We're all busy,

966
00:32:43,160 --> 00:32:44,700
but that is, I think,

967
00:32:45,065 --> 00:32:47,144
the crux of the problem. And what look

968
00:32:47,144 --> 00:32:48,904
at the brother and what they're doing. I

969
00:32:48,904 --> 00:32:50,585
mean, how long ago do they change the

970
00:32:50,585 --> 00:32:53,325
organization for bishops? How many bishops are here?

971
00:32:53,545 --> 00:32:56,585
Bishops? So we have several bishops. Yeah. Good

972
00:32:56,585 --> 00:32:58,424
representation. Change how long ago was it that

973
00:32:58,424 --> 00:33:00,629
we changed it that your responsibilities to judge

974
00:33:00,629 --> 00:33:02,149
in Israel and the youth, and that's pretty

975
00:33:02,149 --> 00:33:04,069
much it. How many words are really doing

976
00:33:04,069 --> 00:33:04,569
that?

977
00:33:04,869 --> 00:33:06,230
Because if and why are we doing that?

978
00:33:06,230 --> 00:33:08,629
Because the brethren get it. You need more

979
00:33:08,629 --> 00:33:10,169
time with the youth,

980
00:33:10,549 --> 00:33:12,230
so they can trust you, so they can

981
00:33:12,230 --> 00:33:13,849
open up, so they can share.

982
00:33:14,194 --> 00:33:16,535
And if it's the 5 minute interview and

983
00:33:16,835 --> 00:33:19,154
my missionaries complained that we had 2 our

984
00:33:19,154 --> 00:33:20,595
little reads were too long. So we had

985
00:33:20,595 --> 00:33:22,454
the opposite problem in our mission. But,

986
00:33:24,194 --> 00:33:24,694
but

987
00:33:25,154 --> 00:33:28,194
you gotta have the time to develop that.

988
00:33:28,194 --> 00:33:28,694
Yeah.

989
00:33:29,119 --> 00:33:30,019
And I I

990
00:33:30,400 --> 00:33:32,640
think we're too rushed. We're too busy. And

991
00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:35,140
we do that sometimes with therapy too. Right?

992
00:33:35,200 --> 00:33:38,160
I have an incredible opportunity to partner with

993
00:33:38,160 --> 00:33:40,320
some phenomenal people. Some of them are here

994
00:33:40,320 --> 00:33:41,539
today from Accepted.

995
00:33:42,224 --> 00:33:44,865
This is a therapy group that's doing some

996
00:33:44,865 --> 00:33:46,244
incredibly different things

997
00:33:46,704 --> 00:33:47,924
way beyond therapy

998
00:33:48,384 --> 00:33:49,365
with retreats

999
00:33:49,664 --> 00:33:50,484
and group

1000
00:33:50,944 --> 00:33:53,345
things, and I'm just so excited to be

1001
00:33:53,345 --> 00:33:55,980
part of that. And so I I'm a

1002
00:33:55,980 --> 00:33:58,140
huge proponent of therapy. I am a huge

1003
00:33:58,140 --> 00:34:00,299
proponent of that. And so don't take this

1004
00:34:00,299 --> 00:34:02,220
the wrong way. But I think sometimes as

1005
00:34:02,220 --> 00:34:04,140
leaders, we have a mess with somebody. And

1006
00:34:04,140 --> 00:34:05,039
what do we do?

1007
00:34:05,340 --> 00:34:06,000
We just

1008
00:34:06,434 --> 00:34:07,955
let's send them off to a therapist because

1009
00:34:07,955 --> 00:34:09,074
I don't have the time to deal with

1010
00:34:09,074 --> 00:34:11,315
that. And I also wanna be careful with

1011
00:34:11,315 --> 00:34:12,454
this comment because

1012
00:34:13,155 --> 00:34:15,635
mental health is real. It is so real.

1013
00:34:15,635 --> 00:34:18,835
I would never minimize that. It's legitimate. It

1014
00:34:19,315 --> 00:34:21,555
medication and therapy, all of that is so

1015
00:34:21,555 --> 00:34:22,055
real.

1016
00:34:23,079 --> 00:34:24,839
But also on the other side of it,

1017
00:34:24,839 --> 00:34:27,400
how much mental health is a result of

1018
00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:28,380
false doctrine,

1019
00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:29,420
contention,

1020
00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:31,719
not knowing how to apply the gospel in

1021
00:34:31,719 --> 00:34:33,719
our lives, not knowing how to connect with

1022
00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:36,945
Jesus Christ that causes anxiety, depression, and stress.

1023
00:34:37,244 --> 00:34:38,625
And as a key holder,

1024
00:34:39,085 --> 00:34:40,704
as a leader in the church,

1025
00:34:41,324 --> 00:34:43,244
we have to be using the doctrine more

1026
00:34:43,244 --> 00:34:45,244
and not just oh, there you just go

1027
00:34:45,244 --> 00:34:47,565
off to therapy. It's a when you combine

1028
00:34:47,565 --> 00:34:48,545
those two things,

1029
00:34:48,909 --> 00:34:51,469
when I've got a leader that is focusing

1030
00:34:51,469 --> 00:34:52,369
on the doctrine

1031
00:34:53,150 --> 00:34:56,349
and then a therapist that's focusing on skills

1032
00:34:56,349 --> 00:34:59,010
and techniques and getting to deep issues,

1033
00:34:59,389 --> 00:35:01,469
the combination of those two things is very

1034
00:35:01,469 --> 00:35:03,885
powerful. I just can't brush them off to

1035
00:35:03,885 --> 00:35:04,545
the therapist.

1036
00:35:05,164 --> 00:35:05,565
So

1037
00:35:05,965 --> 00:35:08,045
Now I wanna stick with this principle of

1038
00:35:08,045 --> 00:35:10,065
time because this is definitely

1039
00:35:12,204 --> 00:35:14,625
a factor in every leadership experience.

1040
00:35:15,329 --> 00:35:17,730
I have a friend serving as a mission

1041
00:35:17,730 --> 00:35:19,570
president right now. This is an individual who's

1042
00:35:19,570 --> 00:35:20,390
run international

1043
00:35:20,930 --> 00:35:23,329
companies, and he said, not even close. This

1044
00:35:23,329 --> 00:35:26,450
is the hardest thing I've ever done. Right?

1045
00:35:26,450 --> 00:35:28,210
And I think time is a big component

1046
00:35:28,210 --> 00:35:29,030
of that. And

1047
00:35:29,424 --> 00:35:31,505
and I imagine, like, from the minute you

1048
00:35:31,505 --> 00:35:33,585
wake up, I'm sure messages are coming in.

1049
00:35:33,585 --> 00:35:35,424
There's fires to be put out. I mean,

1050
00:35:35,424 --> 00:35:38,065
there's never a moment unless you create it

1051
00:35:38,065 --> 00:35:38,724
of just

1052
00:35:39,105 --> 00:35:41,364
separating yourself from the hustle and bustle,

1053
00:35:41,769 --> 00:35:44,010
connecting with God so that you can survive

1054
00:35:44,010 --> 00:35:46,250
as an individual and and actually, you know,

1055
00:35:46,250 --> 00:35:47,849
you you put your mask on first in

1056
00:35:47,849 --> 00:35:49,849
the in the airplane. Right? Anything else is

1057
00:35:49,849 --> 00:35:51,769
just about that. Like, how do you manage

1058
00:35:51,769 --> 00:35:52,829
the day to day

1059
00:35:53,210 --> 00:35:55,434
of it just coming after you? Okay. So

1060
00:35:55,434 --> 00:35:55,934
once

1061
00:35:56,234 --> 00:35:58,234
again, I I know I offend and I'm

1062
00:35:58,234 --> 00:36:00,414
I'm blunt, so forgive me. But

1063
00:36:00,875 --> 00:36:03,194
that's kinda arrogant to think I'm the guy,

1064
00:36:03,194 --> 00:36:04,954
and I'm the only one that's there in

1065
00:36:04,954 --> 00:36:05,534
the mission.

1066
00:36:05,835 --> 00:36:07,994
I am telling you, we have got to

1067
00:36:07,994 --> 00:36:10,980
stop looking at young adults as the problem.

1068
00:36:11,780 --> 00:36:12,760
They're the solution,

1069
00:36:13,539 --> 00:36:15,639
and we're not treating them like that.

1070
00:36:15,940 --> 00:36:18,019
So if I wanna be an effective mission

1071
00:36:18,019 --> 00:36:20,519
president, he gets this incredibly busy in time,

1072
00:36:20,579 --> 00:36:22,440
I have to enable my missionaries

1073
00:36:22,820 --> 00:36:25,514
to help each other. And when that happens,

1074
00:36:26,054 --> 00:36:28,054
that is powerful. I would sit with my

1075
00:36:28,054 --> 00:36:30,135
assistants, many of my assistants, and I'd say,

1076
00:36:30,135 --> 00:36:32,054
I I think I don't wanna do this,

1077
00:36:32,054 --> 00:36:34,054
but it's time to send this missionary home.

1078
00:36:34,054 --> 00:36:36,074
And the assistant would say, no president.

1079
00:36:36,510 --> 00:36:37,010
Release

1080
00:36:37,550 --> 00:36:39,010
me, and I'll be his companion.

1081
00:36:39,469 --> 00:36:40,769
Let me mentor him.

1082
00:36:41,150 --> 00:36:43,070
And we would do that. And I'll tell

1083
00:36:43,070 --> 00:36:45,630
you, short of, you know, obviously, sometimes worthiness

1084
00:36:45,630 --> 00:36:47,309
issues or mental health issues, people had to

1085
00:36:47,309 --> 00:36:50,349
go home, but my missionary wasn't me. My

1086
00:36:50,349 --> 00:36:52,704
missionary saved other mission missionaries.

1087
00:36:53,324 --> 00:36:54,565
I don't know who came up with this.

1088
00:36:54,565 --> 00:36:56,684
I think it's Tyler Griffin, who's got to

1089
00:36:56,684 --> 00:36:58,364
be one of the greatest teachers that we

1090
00:36:58,364 --> 00:37:00,125
have in the church today. But I think

1091
00:37:00,125 --> 00:37:02,545
he's the one who coined the civil launch

1092
00:37:02,684 --> 00:37:05,420
syndrome. Have you heard that Where Alma is

1093
00:37:05,420 --> 00:37:08,000
teaching his his three sons in Alma 36

1094
00:37:08,219 --> 00:37:10,859
to 42. Right? And he's got the future

1095
00:37:10,859 --> 00:37:13,819
leader, Helaman. He's got Shiblon, and he's got

1096
00:37:13,819 --> 00:37:14,319
Koryant

1097
00:37:14,619 --> 00:37:15,900
that, you know, we had a few problems

1098
00:37:15,900 --> 00:37:19,094
there. Right? And so who gets the bulk

1099
00:37:19,094 --> 00:37:21,515
of the time? Of the all the verses,

1100
00:37:21,735 --> 00:37:23,355
who gets the most attention?

1101
00:37:23,735 --> 00:37:25,594
Corianta does. Right?

1102
00:37:26,055 --> 00:37:28,135
And then who gets the net? He gets

1103
00:37:28,135 --> 00:37:29,675
50% of the verses

1104
00:37:30,130 --> 00:37:31,109
in those chapters.

1105
00:37:31,570 --> 00:37:32,309
Then Helaman,

1106
00:37:33,010 --> 00:37:34,309
the future prophet,

1107
00:37:34,690 --> 00:37:35,909
he gets 42%

1108
00:37:36,849 --> 00:37:38,949
of the verses, and Shiblon

1109
00:37:39,489 --> 00:37:40,389
gets 8%.

1110
00:37:41,090 --> 00:37:43,409
Well, this is the problem as a mission

1111
00:37:43,409 --> 00:37:45,684
president. I am dealing with the leaders and

1112
00:37:45,684 --> 00:37:47,284
trying to train leaders, and then I'm dealing

1113
00:37:47,284 --> 00:37:49,684
with all the struggling missionaries are going home.

1114
00:37:49,684 --> 00:37:52,425
What about the 70, 80% of the missionaries

1115
00:37:52,565 --> 00:37:53,464
that are the shiblands

1116
00:37:53,925 --> 00:37:55,065
that are good missionaries?

1117
00:37:55,364 --> 00:37:56,804
That if you would give them the time,

1118
00:37:56,804 --> 00:37:58,664
you could help them become great missionaries.

1119
00:37:59,210 --> 00:38:00,569
And this is the same problem we have,

1120
00:38:00,569 --> 00:38:02,089
I think, in words. This is the same

1121
00:38:02,089 --> 00:38:04,429
problem we sometimes have in families. Right?

1122
00:38:04,730 --> 00:38:05,549
And so

1123
00:38:06,009 --> 00:38:08,089
you just can't do it yourself. And as

1124
00:38:08,089 --> 00:38:09,849
a mission president, if you try to do

1125
00:38:09,849 --> 00:38:11,929
that, it's just it's not possible. You'll you'll

1126
00:38:11,929 --> 00:38:14,324
kill yourself. Yeah. So you have to use

1127
00:38:14,324 --> 00:38:15,545
these lateral mentors.

1128
00:38:16,005 --> 00:38:17,684
And then this is what's so heart wrenching

1129
00:38:17,684 --> 00:38:19,605
to me as you train these missionaries to

1130
00:38:19,605 --> 00:38:21,144
go rescue their peers,

1131
00:38:21,525 --> 00:38:23,364
and then they come home from their missions,

1132
00:38:23,364 --> 00:38:25,605
and dang it. We treat them like young

1133
00:38:25,605 --> 00:38:27,480
men and young women again. What are we

1134
00:38:27,480 --> 00:38:27,980
doing?

1135
00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:30,940
They're so prepared. They're so ready.

1136
00:38:31,239 --> 00:38:32,840
And we come home from their missions, and

1137
00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:34,760
they're like and we are blessed to have

1138
00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:36,280
the young adult programs here in Utah. You

1139
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:38,440
don't have that around the world. You can't

1140
00:38:38,440 --> 00:38:40,519
have a young adult program in Peru. Do

1141
00:38:40,519 --> 00:38:42,494
you know why? It would be so awesome

1142
00:38:42,494 --> 00:38:44,094
to have a young adult ward. You can't

1143
00:38:44,094 --> 00:38:44,755
do it

1144
00:38:45,054 --> 00:38:46,355
because the young adults

1145
00:38:46,974 --> 00:38:49,714
are what is causing the wards to thrive.

1146
00:38:50,094 --> 00:38:52,014
And you pull those return missionaries and those

1147
00:38:52,014 --> 00:38:53,775
young adults out of the wards, we would

1148
00:38:53,775 --> 00:38:54,994
be in so much trouble.

1149
00:38:55,934 --> 00:38:57,359
So we're lucky

1150
00:38:57,980 --> 00:38:58,219
here, but

1151
00:38:58,940 --> 00:39:01,739
Yeah. We gotta trust this generation more. Tell

1152
00:39:01,739 --> 00:39:04,139
me more about that enabling. Like like, how

1153
00:39:04,139 --> 00:39:05,260
do you get to that point where that

1154
00:39:05,260 --> 00:39:07,099
missionary, your assistant could speak up and say,

1155
00:39:07,099 --> 00:39:09,280
release me. Let me help him or stimulating

1156
00:39:09,339 --> 00:39:12,344
that so that the missionary himself feels like,

1157
00:39:12,344 --> 00:39:14,025
oh, I can make a difference. I can

1158
00:39:14,025 --> 00:39:16,184
mentor. We don't all have to wait for

1159
00:39:16,184 --> 00:39:18,425
our next interview with president. Is anything come

1160
00:39:18,425 --> 00:39:19,945
to mind as how you stimulate that? I

1161
00:39:19,945 --> 00:39:21,864
know these are nuance, but Well, I I

1162
00:39:21,864 --> 00:39:23,385
kinda I'm just looking at my,

1163
00:39:24,260 --> 00:39:25,940
so my top notes go to and we

1164
00:39:25,940 --> 00:39:27,619
talked about time. Let's talk about traditions here

1165
00:39:27,619 --> 00:39:29,380
for a little bit because this is one

1166
00:39:29,380 --> 00:39:31,780
of these traditions. There's so many traditions that

1167
00:39:31,780 --> 00:39:34,339
we have got to challenge, but this is

1168
00:39:34,339 --> 00:39:36,900
one of those traditions that we tend to

1169
00:39:36,900 --> 00:39:38,599
focus on our weaknesses,

1170
00:39:39,505 --> 00:39:41,425
are things we need to change, things don't

1171
00:39:41,425 --> 00:39:43,905
like about ourselves. Right? And if that's the

1172
00:39:43,905 --> 00:39:46,065
culture, I'd have missionaries that were just miserable

1173
00:39:46,065 --> 00:39:49,025
and unhappy. And I would say, well, what

1174
00:39:49,025 --> 00:39:50,625
are your goals? What are you focusing on?

1175
00:39:50,625 --> 00:39:52,484
And almost every single time.

1176
00:39:52,910 --> 00:39:55,070
And how many of us are focusing on

1177
00:39:55,070 --> 00:39:55,730
our weaknesses,

1178
00:39:56,269 --> 00:39:58,110
on the things we lack, the things that

1179
00:39:58,110 --> 00:40:00,030
we're not doing well, and we tend to

1180
00:40:00,030 --> 00:40:02,210
base all of our goals on that stuff.

1181
00:40:02,349 --> 00:40:04,530
Well, I'm sorry. That's incredibly discouraging.

1182
00:40:05,075 --> 00:40:06,434
I'm gonna get to your question here, but

1183
00:40:06,434 --> 00:40:07,635
just give me a second to get back

1184
00:40:07,635 --> 00:40:08,215
to that.

1185
00:40:08,755 --> 00:40:09,735
It's very discouraging

1186
00:40:10,355 --> 00:40:12,275
and doesn't create any joy or happiness with

1187
00:40:12,275 --> 00:40:14,835
that. So how do you move away from

1188
00:40:14,835 --> 00:40:16,454
the focus on weakness

1189
00:40:17,170 --> 00:40:18,849
And think if I would I would use

1190
00:40:19,010 --> 00:40:21,010
I would help them to try to focus

1191
00:40:21,010 --> 00:40:23,909
more on finding their talents and their gifts.

1192
00:40:24,210 --> 00:40:26,230
So I would ask people, missionaries,

1193
00:40:26,610 --> 00:40:27,889
how many gifts do you have when you

1194
00:40:27,889 --> 00:40:29,844
patriarchal blessing? I'm gonna put you on spot.

1195
00:40:29,844 --> 00:40:30,885
You're also with me on the spot. You

1196
00:40:30,885 --> 00:40:31,925
did this in the first one, and I

1197
00:40:32,085 --> 00:40:33,945
I got other questions to ask you. Okay.

1198
00:40:34,644 --> 00:40:36,085
So just off the top of your head,

1199
00:40:36,085 --> 00:40:37,125
how many gifts do you think you have

1200
00:40:37,125 --> 00:40:39,525
in your patriarchal blessing? A 100 and no.

1201
00:40:40,164 --> 00:40:40,664
15.

1202
00:40:40,965 --> 00:40:41,465
15.

1203
00:40:41,765 --> 00:40:44,405
K. Most missionaries would tell me 3 or

1204
00:40:44,405 --> 00:40:46,280
4 or 5. I've had some missionaries tell

1205
00:40:46,280 --> 00:40:47,480
me I don't think there's any gifts in

1206
00:40:47,480 --> 00:40:49,980
my patriarchal blessing, and I would say,

1207
00:40:50,679 --> 00:40:51,179
k.

1208
00:40:51,800 --> 00:40:52,780
Let's focus

1209
00:40:53,239 --> 00:40:56,360
on your gifts and your talents instead of

1210
00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:58,199
your weaknesses. So here's the other question for

1211
00:40:58,199 --> 00:41:00,925
you, Kurt. What is the greatest weakness you

1212
00:41:00,925 --> 00:41:02,684
have? What's the one thing you can't stand

1213
00:41:02,684 --> 00:41:03,425
about yourself?

1214
00:41:03,885 --> 00:41:06,045
I probably experienced some level of ADD, so

1215
00:41:06,045 --> 00:41:07,644
I have a hard time staying focused. Wait.

1216
00:41:07,644 --> 00:41:08,704
What did you just say?

1217
00:41:09,965 --> 00:41:12,125
K. No hesitation. He he knew he knew

1218
00:41:12,125 --> 00:41:12,360
what

1219
00:41:14,360 --> 00:41:14,431
that was. Right? Yes. Okay. He's probably got

1220
00:41:14,431 --> 00:41:15,559
10 other things on top of your head.

1221
00:41:15,559 --> 00:41:17,079
Right? Yeah. K. Now tell me what your

1222
00:41:17,079 --> 00:41:18,140
greatest talent is.

1223
00:41:18,440 --> 00:41:19,820
I'm extremely creative.

1224
00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:20,860
Okay.

1225
00:41:21,400 --> 00:41:21,900
So

1226
00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:23,880
I would ask this question all the time

1227
00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:26,135
to missionaries. What is your greatest weakness thing,

1228
00:41:26,135 --> 00:41:27,695
you know, like, and what is your talent?

1229
00:41:27,695 --> 00:41:28,594
Most missionaries

1230
00:41:29,135 --> 00:41:31,295
couldn't come up with a talent, or they

1231
00:41:31,295 --> 00:41:33,215
had to really think about the talent that

1232
00:41:33,215 --> 00:41:34,434
they had. But

1233
00:41:34,815 --> 00:41:37,795
if your struggle is you can't pay attention

1234
00:41:38,175 --> 00:41:39,394
and you can't focus,

1235
00:41:39,809 --> 00:41:41,030
Well, help me understand.

1236
00:41:41,329 --> 00:41:43,410
If that's a weakness, how can you be

1237
00:41:43,410 --> 00:41:45,030
creative? Because creation

1238
00:41:45,730 --> 00:41:46,230
demands

1239
00:41:46,690 --> 00:41:50,710
attention and and thought and development, and

1240
00:41:51,010 --> 00:41:52,710
so those two things can't coexist.

1241
00:41:53,164 --> 00:41:55,164
Right. So if you wanted to kill your

1242
00:41:55,164 --> 00:41:55,664
weakness,

1243
00:41:56,204 --> 00:41:58,204
why are you focused on the weakness? What

1244
00:41:58,204 --> 00:41:59,565
we should be doing is we should be

1245
00:41:59,565 --> 00:42:02,065
focusing on the talent and the gift

1246
00:42:02,445 --> 00:42:05,505
that just by focusing on that will automatically

1247
00:42:05,804 --> 00:42:06,704
kill the weakness.

1248
00:42:07,150 --> 00:42:09,070
And we don't do that very well. And

1249
00:42:09,070 --> 00:42:10,630
so this is one of those traditions that

1250
00:42:10,750 --> 00:42:12,769
let's talk about I mean, ether 1227

1251
00:42:13,150 --> 00:42:15,309
has got to be the most misquoted scripture

1252
00:42:15,309 --> 00:42:16,369
in all of the church.

1253
00:42:16,670 --> 00:42:18,769
We think it's talking about weaknesses.

1254
00:42:19,230 --> 00:42:21,234
It doesn't say that. It says if men

1255
00:42:21,234 --> 00:42:22,914
will come into me, I'll show unto them

1256
00:42:22,914 --> 00:42:23,574
their weakness.

1257
00:42:24,114 --> 00:42:25,894
It's singular. It's not plural.

1258
00:42:26,275 --> 00:42:28,275
Jesus Christ is not asking us to focus

1259
00:42:28,275 --> 00:42:30,434
on our weakness. I don't have chapter 6

1260
00:42:30,434 --> 00:42:31,655
and preach my gospel.

1261
00:42:31,954 --> 00:42:33,894
Weaknesses that missionaries need to overcome.

1262
00:42:34,260 --> 00:42:36,500
Nope. It's the attributes of Jesus Christ to

1263
00:42:36,500 --> 00:42:38,579
develop. Right? I don't think any of your

1264
00:42:38,579 --> 00:42:40,500
best of your patriarchal blessings list all of

1265
00:42:40,500 --> 00:42:42,119
your weaknesses and all your problems.

1266
00:42:42,659 --> 00:42:44,980
Nope. When I see Jesus Christ interact with

1267
00:42:44,980 --> 00:42:45,960
people in scriptures,

1268
00:42:46,265 --> 00:42:48,105
I don't think he's focused on he's focused

1269
00:42:48,105 --> 00:42:50,425
on their gifts, their talent, what they have

1270
00:42:50,425 --> 00:42:53,224
to give to the world. Right? So why

1271
00:42:53,224 --> 00:42:55,224
are we so focused on that? It says

1272
00:42:55,224 --> 00:42:56,285
weakness because

1273
00:42:56,664 --> 00:43:00,089
weakness is the natural man, and Jesus Christ

1274
00:43:00,089 --> 00:43:02,190
needs you to see the natural man

1275
00:43:02,489 --> 00:43:03,710
or you won't repent.

1276
00:43:04,250 --> 00:43:06,170
So if you come on to me, I'm

1277
00:43:06,170 --> 00:43:08,170
gonna show you your struggle with your natural

1278
00:43:08,170 --> 00:43:11,130
man. So you'll be humble. So you'll want

1279
00:43:11,130 --> 00:43:13,434
to repent. So that I can make a

1280
00:43:13,434 --> 00:43:16,894
weak thing, Rob Ferrell, strong when he's connected

1281
00:43:16,954 --> 00:43:19,434
with me. And so how do we get

1282
00:43:19,434 --> 00:43:21,195
back to this? How do you help with

1283
00:43:21,195 --> 00:43:24,554
that? You gotta help them. If they're gonna

1284
00:43:24,554 --> 00:43:27,054
go out and rescue their fellow missionaries,

1285
00:43:27,619 --> 00:43:28,280
then they

1286
00:43:28,739 --> 00:43:30,660
gotta be really focused on the gifts and

1287
00:43:30,660 --> 00:43:32,039
the talents that they have

1288
00:43:32,340 --> 00:43:34,199
and develop those gifts and talents.

1289
00:43:34,500 --> 00:43:35,780
And why do we have the gifts and

1290
00:43:35,780 --> 00:43:37,699
talents? They're not for our ego. They're not

1291
00:43:37,699 --> 00:43:39,300
for our pride. They're to be able to

1292
00:43:39,300 --> 00:43:42,099
bless the lives of other people. Right? And

1293
00:43:42,099 --> 00:43:42,599
so

1294
00:43:43,094 --> 00:43:45,514
that radically changed our mission

1295
00:43:45,894 --> 00:43:47,835
of focusing on those talents

1296
00:43:48,135 --> 00:43:50,795
and then missionaries asking for opportunities.

1297
00:43:51,414 --> 00:43:53,655
Hey, president. I I I wanna work on

1298
00:43:53,655 --> 00:43:55,175
this gift. I wanna work on this talent.

1299
00:43:55,175 --> 00:43:56,454
How can I do this? How can I

1300
00:43:56,454 --> 00:43:58,599
do that? Way Kay Packer says I'm preaching

1301
00:43:58,599 --> 00:44:00,679
my gospel. The study of doctrine will change

1302
00:44:00,679 --> 00:44:03,159
behavior faster than the study behavioral change behavior.

1303
00:44:03,159 --> 00:44:05,960
Right? That's to me. The study behavior is

1304
00:44:05,960 --> 00:44:07,639
focusing all the crap in my life. It's

1305
00:44:07,639 --> 00:44:09,800
all of my weaknesses, all my problems, all

1306
00:44:09,800 --> 00:44:11,239
the more I focus on that, I'm really

1307
00:44:11,239 --> 00:44:13,224
not going to change. What's gonna change me

1308
00:44:13,224 --> 00:44:14,764
is the focus on the doctrine.

1309
00:44:15,304 --> 00:44:16,764
So I would help missionaries

1310
00:44:17,065 --> 00:44:19,945
figure out their gifts and their blessings. I

1311
00:44:19,945 --> 00:44:21,784
would have missionaries tell me 3 or 5

1312
00:44:21,945 --> 00:44:23,385
I have 3 or 5 gifts. I would

1313
00:44:23,385 --> 00:44:25,465
say, bring your blessing to me the next

1314
00:44:25,465 --> 00:44:26,889
time we see each other. Now I wanna

1315
00:44:26,889 --> 00:44:29,050
be careful. Some people think I had missionaries.

1316
00:44:29,050 --> 00:44:30,650
I I can't do that. I can't share

1317
00:44:30,650 --> 00:44:33,630
my blessing with you. What? Yes. You can.

1318
00:44:33,769 --> 00:44:36,329
It's your decision intimately with leaders and family

1319
00:44:36,329 --> 00:44:37,690
and friends. You can do that. You don't

1320
00:44:37,690 --> 00:44:40,275
wanna talk about maybe in in sacrumeting or

1321
00:44:40,355 --> 00:44:41,714
or post it on your wall, your house

1322
00:44:41,714 --> 00:44:43,414
or something, but you can talk about it.

1323
00:44:43,635 --> 00:44:45,394
And we have to be very careful. We

1324
00:44:45,394 --> 00:44:47,894
help people with finding gifts and their blessings.

1325
00:44:48,194 --> 00:44:51,394
We can't interpret a patriarchal blessing. We cross

1326
00:44:51,394 --> 00:44:53,315
the line when we do that. But for

1327
00:44:53,315 --> 00:44:54,994
me to read, I would just read one

1328
00:44:54,994 --> 00:44:55,494
paragraph,

1329
00:44:55,940 --> 00:44:57,380
and I wouldn't put it in my own

1330
00:44:57,380 --> 00:44:59,300
words. I'd use the words of the blessing,

1331
00:44:59,300 --> 00:45:00,900
and I'd say, is this not a gift?

1332
00:45:00,900 --> 00:45:02,820
Is that not a gift? I remember I

1333
00:45:02,820 --> 00:45:04,260
had one missionary who told me he had

1334
00:45:04,260 --> 00:45:06,900
3 talents or gifts in his blessing. We

1335
00:45:06,900 --> 00:45:09,800
read one paragraph together. We found 17,

1336
00:45:10,315 --> 00:45:11,594
And he's like, okay. I gotta read this

1337
00:45:11,594 --> 00:45:12,255
over again.

1338
00:45:13,755 --> 00:45:15,755
I had a sister missionary just 2 months

1339
00:45:15,755 --> 00:45:16,255
ago,

1340
00:45:16,715 --> 00:45:19,375
struggling so much I'm not good enough comparing,

1341
00:45:19,914 --> 00:45:22,315
and we shifted the weaknesses, the problems, when

1342
00:45:22,315 --> 00:45:24,094
we focused on the gifts and the talents,

1343
00:45:24,339 --> 00:45:26,119
she came and she said she had

1344
00:45:26,420 --> 00:45:27,719
14, 15 talents.

1345
00:45:28,260 --> 00:45:29,159
We read a paragraph.

1346
00:45:29,619 --> 00:45:31,619
She texted me that night. Present, I found

1347
00:45:31,619 --> 00:45:32,280
a 133.

1348
00:45:33,460 --> 00:45:35,079
Do you think that ignited her?

1349
00:45:35,460 --> 00:45:36,839
To see have God

1350
00:45:37,139 --> 00:45:38,280
see her like that?

1351
00:45:38,625 --> 00:45:40,144
And so I had this missionary that came

1352
00:45:40,144 --> 00:45:42,804
into me and he was struggling with masturbation.

1353
00:45:43,505 --> 00:45:44,005
And

1354
00:45:44,545 --> 00:45:46,625
we did that. We shifted. He said, he

1355
00:45:46,625 --> 00:45:49,045
said that his blessing had no gifts.

1356
00:45:49,344 --> 00:45:50,940
So I said, okay, give me your blessing.

1357
00:45:51,179 --> 00:45:52,800
I read one line,

1358
00:45:53,179 --> 00:45:55,099
and the line said, you have the power

1359
00:45:55,099 --> 00:45:56,239
to thwart Satan.

1360
00:45:56,699 --> 00:45:58,460
I'm going home and I'm writing that in

1361
00:45:58,460 --> 00:46:00,719
my blessing because I want that one. Right?

1362
00:46:00,940 --> 00:46:03,260
And so we just stopped with that. And

1363
00:46:03,260 --> 00:46:05,039
I said, you don't think that's a gift?

1364
00:46:06,045 --> 00:46:08,844
And he said, well, maybe. I said, well,

1365
00:46:08,844 --> 00:46:10,545
let's do this for the next month.

1366
00:46:10,844 --> 00:46:12,764
I want you to take that gift, and

1367
00:46:12,764 --> 00:46:14,605
that's gonna be your focus for the entire

1368
00:46:14,605 --> 00:46:15,105
month.

1369
00:46:15,405 --> 00:46:17,804
And now, if doctrine is what's gonna change

1370
00:46:17,804 --> 00:46:18,304
us,

1371
00:46:18,609 --> 00:46:20,130
God gives us gifts to be able to

1372
00:46:20,130 --> 00:46:22,210
bless the lives of their people. So now

1373
00:46:22,210 --> 00:46:23,510
let's take your gift

1374
00:46:23,809 --> 00:46:26,849
and let's use the doctrine behind that gift,

1375
00:46:26,849 --> 00:46:29,829
and let's combine the doctrine and your gift,

1376
00:46:30,050 --> 00:46:31,809
and let's see what God's gonna do with

1377
00:46:31,809 --> 00:46:33,925
that. So for the next month, all of

1378
00:46:33,925 --> 00:46:35,684
your goals, all of your focus is gonna

1379
00:46:35,684 --> 00:46:37,385
be how you're gonna develop that gift.

1380
00:46:37,684 --> 00:46:39,925
So he studied about the power of Satan.

1381
00:46:39,925 --> 00:46:42,244
He studied about the priesthood. He asked a

1382
00:46:42,244 --> 00:46:44,085
special permission to go to the temple because

1383
00:46:44,085 --> 00:46:46,005
he wanted to study more about the power

1384
00:46:46,005 --> 00:46:47,940
of Satan in the temple. He calls me

1385
00:46:47,940 --> 00:46:49,460
up outside of the temple, and he says,

1386
00:46:49,460 --> 00:46:51,780
president Farrell, did you know that Satan is

1387
00:46:51,780 --> 00:46:53,780
the god of this world? Yeah. I knew

1388
00:46:53,780 --> 00:46:54,280
that.

1389
00:46:54,659 --> 00:46:57,619
He said, I have the power to thwart

1390
00:46:57,619 --> 00:46:59,940
the god of this world. I said, yeah.

1391
00:46:59,940 --> 00:47:00,920
That's pretty cool.

1392
00:47:01,864 --> 00:47:04,364
He was just so excited. He was learning

1393
00:47:04,505 --> 00:47:06,344
so much. What do you think that did

1394
00:47:06,344 --> 00:47:07,804
to his personal study?

1395
00:47:08,505 --> 00:47:10,984
It totally changed his he's not reading page

1396
00:47:10,984 --> 00:47:13,065
by page. He's reading about Moses, and he's

1397
00:47:13,065 --> 00:47:14,905
reading about the stories of Christ casting evil

1398
00:47:14,905 --> 00:47:17,109
spirits, and he's just going to town. And

1399
00:47:17,109 --> 00:47:19,109
so he has a whole month of focusing

1400
00:47:19,109 --> 00:47:21,510
on that. And he's checking in with me,

1401
00:47:21,510 --> 00:47:23,589
and he says, president, I have never had

1402
00:47:23,589 --> 00:47:25,190
so many people ask me to give him

1403
00:47:25,190 --> 00:47:27,510
a priesthood blessing. So I would encourage them

1404
00:47:27,510 --> 00:47:29,769
to set to study that

1405
00:47:30,070 --> 00:47:30,809
that gift,

1406
00:47:31,324 --> 00:47:33,744
to understand the doctrine behind that gift,

1407
00:47:34,045 --> 00:47:36,605
then write a talk about that gift, and

1408
00:47:36,605 --> 00:47:37,585
then practice.

1409
00:47:38,364 --> 00:47:40,684
Ask God to give you opportunities to practice

1410
00:47:40,684 --> 00:47:43,164
that gift, because if you see God giving

1411
00:47:43,164 --> 00:47:45,244
you opportunities to practice the gift, what's gonna

1412
00:47:45,244 --> 00:47:47,670
happen to your relationship with God? It's gonna

1413
00:47:47,670 --> 00:47:48,170
grow.

1414
00:47:48,789 --> 00:47:50,089
And then I promise

1415
00:47:50,389 --> 00:47:51,690
you will have a miracle.

1416
00:47:52,309 --> 00:47:54,389
So he's having a month, couple I don't

1417
00:47:54,389 --> 00:47:55,449
know, 4, 5 weeks,

1418
00:47:55,750 --> 00:47:57,429
and he calls me up. It's like 9

1419
00:47:57,429 --> 00:47:59,670
o'clock at night. I'm with my family. And

1420
00:47:59,670 --> 00:48:01,989
so sorry. I'm with family. Missionaries are calling.

1421
00:48:01,989 --> 00:48:03,644
They're gonna have to wait. Then he calls

1422
00:48:03,644 --> 00:48:05,644
again, and then he calls again, and then

1423
00:48:05,644 --> 00:48:08,125
the assistants call. Okay. Something's going on. Right?

1424
00:48:08,125 --> 00:48:09,724
So I pick up the phone call, and

1425
00:48:09,724 --> 00:48:10,625
he says panic.

1426
00:48:10,925 --> 00:48:12,945
And he says, president Farrell,

1427
00:48:13,405 --> 00:48:16,364
a less active man called me tonight, and

1428
00:48:16,364 --> 00:48:17,905
none of his family are members.

1429
00:48:18,300 --> 00:48:20,300
And he says there's someone in the home

1430
00:48:20,300 --> 00:48:22,860
tonight that's possessed of people's spirits. What do

1431
00:48:22,860 --> 00:48:24,699
I do, president? I said, what what do

1432
00:48:24,699 --> 00:48:26,619
you mean? What do you do? You've been

1433
00:48:26,619 --> 00:48:28,239
studying this for the last month.

1434
00:48:28,619 --> 00:48:30,864
You know exactly what to do. Call me

1435
00:48:30,864 --> 00:48:32,724
when it's over. And I hung

1436
00:48:33,105 --> 00:48:33,605
up

1437
00:48:33,985 --> 00:48:34,485
on

1438
00:48:34,865 --> 00:48:35,365
him.

1439
00:48:35,744 --> 00:48:37,364
And so he called me back,

1440
00:48:37,664 --> 00:48:39,744
and he said, we walked to this man's

1441
00:48:39,744 --> 00:48:41,744
house. He said, I stood in the street,

1442
00:48:41,744 --> 00:48:43,125
and I could feel darkness.

1443
00:48:43,610 --> 00:48:45,949
I could feel the presence of evil.

1444
00:48:46,489 --> 00:48:48,730
And now look what happened to him simply

1445
00:48:48,730 --> 00:48:50,829
by focusing on a gift of his.

1446
00:48:51,530 --> 00:48:53,390
He said, I remembered Moses

1447
00:48:53,849 --> 00:48:56,030
trying to cast out Satan 3 times.

1448
00:48:56,329 --> 00:48:58,510
And finally, the 4th time he figured out,

1449
00:48:58,655 --> 00:48:59,614
you gotta do it in the name of

1450
00:48:59,614 --> 00:49:00,355
Jesus Christ.

1451
00:49:00,815 --> 00:49:03,295
And so my companion and I prayed in

1452
00:49:03,295 --> 00:49:03,954
the street,

1453
00:49:04,255 --> 00:49:05,534
and we got done with the prayer. I

1454
00:49:05,534 --> 00:49:07,135
had my head down and opened my eyes,

1455
00:49:07,135 --> 00:49:08,514
and I saw my batch.

1456
00:49:08,894 --> 00:49:11,054
I said, oh, we have the name of

1457
00:49:11,054 --> 00:49:11,954
Jesus Christ.

1458
00:49:12,410 --> 00:49:14,190
He said I walked in that home arrogant,

1459
00:49:14,329 --> 00:49:16,170
but I walked in that home with such

1460
00:49:16,170 --> 00:49:16,670
confidence.

1461
00:49:17,450 --> 00:49:19,130
We walked into a home with 7 people,

1462
00:49:19,130 --> 00:49:21,130
and it was a little scary. This woman

1463
00:49:21,130 --> 00:49:23,210
was doing some odd things, and there was

1464
00:49:23,210 --> 00:49:25,530
definitely an evil presence there. I said, so

1465
00:49:25,530 --> 00:49:26,910
what you knew do next?

1466
00:49:27,335 --> 00:49:29,275
He said, I gathered the family together,

1467
00:49:29,734 --> 00:49:30,234
and

1468
00:49:30,534 --> 00:49:32,454
I talked to them about the miracles of

1469
00:49:32,454 --> 00:49:34,054
Christ and casting an evil spirit. So I

1470
00:49:34,054 --> 00:49:35,734
talked about the priesthood. I talked about having

1471
00:49:35,734 --> 00:49:37,815
that power today. He went on to all

1472
00:49:37,815 --> 00:49:39,815
these things that he'd been reading and studying

1473
00:49:39,815 --> 00:49:41,369
about. And then he

1474
00:49:41,829 --> 00:49:43,109
said, I want to know and these are

1475
00:49:43,109 --> 00:49:44,550
none of these are members of the church.

1476
00:49:44,550 --> 00:49:46,869
He said, I want to ask each of

1477
00:49:46,869 --> 00:49:49,210
you if you have faith in Jesus Christ.

1478
00:49:49,670 --> 00:49:52,309
Because if you will unite your faith in

1479
00:49:52,309 --> 00:49:53,849
Jesus Christ with mine,

1480
00:49:54,394 --> 00:49:56,234
then when I place my hands on her

1481
00:49:56,234 --> 00:49:56,734
head,

1482
00:49:57,275 --> 00:49:59,835
together, there will be a power to cast

1483
00:49:59,835 --> 00:50:01,594
out evil. So he went around there. Do

1484
00:50:01,594 --> 00:50:02,554
you have faith in Christ? Do you have

1485
00:50:02,554 --> 00:50:03,594
faith in Christ? Do you have faith in

1486
00:50:03,594 --> 00:50:05,755
Christ? I said, Eleanor, where did you learn

1487
00:50:05,755 --> 00:50:07,454
that? That is so good.

1488
00:50:07,900 --> 00:50:09,340
He said, Preston Ferrell, we learned that in

1489
00:50:09,340 --> 00:50:11,099
the temple. I said, what? Where did we

1490
00:50:11,099 --> 00:50:13,179
learn that in the temple? He says, we

1491
00:50:13,179 --> 00:50:15,179
don't stand in the circle and unite faith

1492
00:50:15,179 --> 00:50:17,599
to perform miracles on behalf of other people?

1493
00:50:17,739 --> 00:50:18,780
Oh, yeah. We do do that in the

1494
00:50:18,780 --> 00:50:19,280
temple.

1495
00:50:19,900 --> 00:50:21,739
And and so look what he do you

1496
00:50:21,739 --> 00:50:22,800
see what he's learning?

1497
00:50:23,285 --> 00:50:25,045
And then he puts his hands on her

1498
00:50:25,045 --> 00:50:26,985
head, and he cast out evil spirits.

1499
00:50:27,364 --> 00:50:29,285
And then he gets done, and we where

1500
00:50:29,285 --> 00:50:31,525
he's going to leave, and his father said,

1501
00:50:31,525 --> 00:50:32,985
you can't leave our home.

1502
00:50:33,285 --> 00:50:34,105
He said,

1503
00:50:34,405 --> 00:50:36,565
these evil spirits, this feeling will just come

1504
00:50:36,565 --> 00:50:37,305
back again.

1505
00:50:37,640 --> 00:50:39,739
And he had learned about, in his studies,

1506
00:50:40,119 --> 00:50:42,360
dedicating a home. He said, well, we can

1507
00:50:42,360 --> 00:50:44,119
dedicate your home, and we'll bless your home,

1508
00:50:44,119 --> 00:50:46,039
and we'll protect your home. So they did

1509
00:50:46,039 --> 00:50:48,199
that. And he says that was even a

1510
00:50:48,199 --> 00:50:50,599
more spiritual experience than casting out the evil

1511
00:50:50,599 --> 00:50:53,085
spirits. And then he grabbed his father, and

1512
00:50:53,085 --> 00:50:54,844
he said, you need to come to church

1513
00:50:54,844 --> 00:50:55,344
tomorrow,

1514
00:50:55,885 --> 00:50:57,264
and you need to take the sacrament.

1515
00:50:57,724 --> 00:50:58,224
And

1516
00:50:58,844 --> 00:51:01,005
the dad said, oh, elder. You you don't

1517
00:51:01,005 --> 00:51:03,005
know where I've been. I can't. I'm not

1518
00:51:03,005 --> 00:51:05,085
worthy to take the sacrament. And this is

1519
00:51:05,085 --> 00:51:05,664
a missionary

1520
00:51:06,125 --> 00:51:06,625
that

1521
00:51:07,005 --> 00:51:09,750
listened to me because he quoted doctrine and

1522
00:51:09,750 --> 00:51:11,829
covenant section 10, and he said, do you

1523
00:51:11,829 --> 00:51:13,910
have a desire to repent? Yes. I do.

1524
00:51:13,910 --> 00:51:15,030
Do you have a desire to come and

1525
00:51:15,030 --> 00:51:17,349
follow Jesus Christ? Yes. I do. Then you

1526
00:51:17,349 --> 00:51:19,210
come tomorrow and you take this sacrament.

1527
00:51:19,670 --> 00:51:20,170
So

1528
00:51:20,494 --> 00:51:22,574
you get done sharing this experience with me,

1529
00:51:22,574 --> 00:51:24,494
and with everybody else, and everyone's leaves, and

1530
00:51:24,494 --> 00:51:26,175
just this missionary and I are talking, and

1531
00:51:26,175 --> 00:51:27,775
this is his his comment to me. He

1532
00:51:27,775 --> 00:51:28,594
says, president,

1533
00:51:29,054 --> 00:51:31,074
what's the next gift we should work on?

1534
00:51:31,295 --> 00:51:33,614
See, that's how you get them empowered to

1535
00:51:33,614 --> 00:51:35,519
go then serve each other. And now as

1536
00:51:35,519 --> 00:51:36,500
a mission president,

1537
00:51:36,800 --> 00:51:38,559
I've got an army that can help me

1538
00:51:38,559 --> 00:51:40,500
with the shiblands in my mission. Right?

1539
00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:42,820
And the more powerful thing is

1540
00:51:43,280 --> 00:51:45,860
we didn't even talk about masturbation

1541
00:51:46,320 --> 00:51:49,140
throughout the entire month of his focus

1542
00:51:50,214 --> 00:51:52,375
of the power to thwart Satan. And as

1543
00:51:52,375 --> 00:51:53,974
he was sharing the experience with me, and

1544
00:51:53,974 --> 00:51:55,974
as we finished up, I said, elder, I'm

1545
00:51:55,974 --> 00:51:58,054
just curious. When's the last time you've had

1546
00:51:58,054 --> 00:51:58,635
a problem?

1547
00:51:59,014 --> 00:52:00,875
It's been a whole month being present.

1548
00:52:01,255 --> 00:52:01,755
So

1549
00:52:02,054 --> 00:52:04,614
these traditions of, oh, focus on your weaknesses

1550
00:52:04,614 --> 00:52:07,170
and old, all these things that we do,

1551
00:52:07,390 --> 00:52:09,309
we need to make sure we're challenging things

1552
00:52:09,309 --> 00:52:09,809
because

1553
00:52:10,430 --> 00:52:13,630
the gospel of Jesus Christ, the doctrine should

1554
00:52:13,630 --> 00:52:14,130
inspire

1555
00:52:14,670 --> 00:52:15,170
us.

1556
00:52:15,550 --> 00:52:17,890
Kevin Hall has a book out called Aspire,

1557
00:52:18,190 --> 00:52:19,949
The Power of Words. And in that book,

1558
00:52:19,949 --> 00:52:22,784
he defines the word inspire, which I just

1559
00:52:22,784 --> 00:52:24,324
love the definition of this.

1560
00:52:24,704 --> 00:52:26,164
Inspires to breathe

1561
00:52:26,545 --> 00:52:29,125
to breathe life into one soul.

1562
00:52:29,824 --> 00:52:31,844
That is the doctrine of Jesus Christ.

1563
00:52:32,144 --> 00:52:34,324
If the doctrine of Jesus Christ is overwhelming

1564
00:52:34,385 --> 00:52:35,925
us, crushing us,

1565
00:52:36,460 --> 00:52:39,739
discouraging us, then sorry, you don't understand the

1566
00:52:39,739 --> 00:52:42,000
doctrine of Jesus Christ. It doesn't do that.

1567
00:52:42,059 --> 00:52:42,800
And so

1568
00:52:43,180 --> 00:52:45,980
anything we're doing, losing confidence in Jesus Christ,

1569
00:52:45,980 --> 00:52:48,539
focusing on weak weaknesses, we could spend the

1570
00:52:48,539 --> 00:52:50,925
whole night on just some traditions that we're

1571
00:52:50,925 --> 00:52:52,704
doing in the church that we need to

1572
00:52:52,765 --> 00:52:55,085
probably challenge a little bit. And I wanna

1573
00:52:55,085 --> 00:52:56,684
be clear on that too. I'm not I'm

1574
00:52:56,684 --> 00:52:58,144
not saying we change the doctrine.

1575
00:52:58,605 --> 00:53:00,445
Anthony Sweat has a book you should all

1576
00:53:00,445 --> 00:53:02,144
read called Seekers Wanted.

1577
00:53:02,589 --> 00:53:05,069
He describes four levels of doctrine. You have

1578
00:53:05,069 --> 00:53:08,030
the core doctrine. You have supporting doctrine. You

1579
00:53:08,030 --> 00:53:10,690
have policy doctrine, and then you have esoteric,

1580
00:53:10,750 --> 00:53:11,489
but doctrine.

1581
00:53:11,789 --> 00:53:13,710
And many of us are not focused on

1582
00:53:13,710 --> 00:53:14,609
the core doctrine.

1583
00:53:14,914 --> 00:53:17,155
Well, the policy doctrine can change all the

1584
00:53:17,155 --> 00:53:19,175
time, and it does change all the time.

1585
00:53:19,234 --> 00:53:21,954
The core doctrine will never change, does not

1586
00:53:21,954 --> 00:53:23,175
change, it's eternal.

1587
00:53:23,554 --> 00:53:26,434
I'm not talking about that. Right? But there

1588
00:53:26,434 --> 00:53:26,934
are

1589
00:53:27,710 --> 00:53:30,989
policy procedural things that need to change, and

1590
00:53:30,989 --> 00:53:32,449
they are changing it.

1591
00:53:32,909 --> 00:53:33,650
The brethren,

1592
00:53:34,109 --> 00:53:35,170
I can testify,

1593
00:53:36,029 --> 00:53:38,369
the sweetness of being a mission president

1594
00:53:38,829 --> 00:53:41,630
is your interaction, a little interaction with with

1595
00:53:41,630 --> 00:53:42,369
the 12.

1596
00:53:42,864 --> 00:53:43,684
They get

1597
00:53:43,985 --> 00:53:46,644
it. They know what they're doing.

1598
00:53:47,344 --> 00:53:49,844
The problem, we've said this a thousand times,

1599
00:53:50,224 --> 00:53:51,445
is middle management.

1600
00:53:53,744 --> 00:53:56,065
We are still stuck in our program or

1601
00:53:56,065 --> 00:53:58,329
doing it this way. Like, for example, I

1602
00:53:58,570 --> 00:54:00,889
no raise of hands or anything, but I

1603
00:54:00,889 --> 00:54:02,089
bet you some of you in this room

1604
00:54:02,089 --> 00:54:03,609
have had kids come home early from their

1605
00:54:03,609 --> 00:54:04,109
missions.

1606
00:54:04,409 --> 00:54:05,769
You know, it used to be a mission

1607
00:54:05,769 --> 00:54:07,369
president didn't have a lot of control with

1608
00:54:07,369 --> 00:54:09,625
that. A missionary would confess, You would talk

1609
00:54:09,625 --> 00:54:11,144
to the area presidency. You would go to

1610
00:54:11,144 --> 00:54:13,465
the mission department. They would make decisions, and

1611
00:54:13,465 --> 00:54:15,305
that we would decide if that missionary came

1612
00:54:15,305 --> 00:54:17,144
home. Did you know there's been a change

1613
00:54:17,144 --> 00:54:19,945
in the missionary president handbook about that? That

1614
00:54:19,945 --> 00:54:21,405
now mission presidents

1615
00:54:22,079 --> 00:54:24,160
have much more of an ability to make

1616
00:54:24,160 --> 00:54:26,820
that decision, whereas before that wasn't the case.

1617
00:54:26,960 --> 00:54:30,180
Wonderful things are happening. Changes are happening. Yep.

1618
00:54:30,320 --> 00:54:32,579
But no. Thank you. Traditions.

1619
00:54:32,880 --> 00:54:34,559
And I I so much just appreciate the

1620
00:54:34,559 --> 00:54:35,059
practicality

1621
00:54:35,360 --> 00:54:37,184
of this. I think in my time of

1622
00:54:37,184 --> 00:54:37,925
of bishop,

1623
00:54:38,224 --> 00:54:40,065
I mean, this doesn't just work with young

1624
00:54:40,065 --> 00:54:43,184
single adults. Like, how many 40, 50, 60

1625
00:54:43,184 --> 00:54:43,845
year olds

1626
00:54:44,305 --> 00:54:45,125
have been

1627
00:54:45,664 --> 00:54:48,065
oriented towards their patriarchal blessing when they're going

1628
00:54:48,065 --> 00:54:49,345
a hard they were going through a hard

1629
00:54:49,345 --> 00:54:51,619
time and saying, let's not focus on your

1630
00:54:51,619 --> 00:54:54,180
weakness here. On the weakness here, let's focus

1631
00:54:54,180 --> 00:54:57,219
on what are the the talents. Right? The

1632
00:54:57,219 --> 00:54:58,440
the blessings, the strengths.

1633
00:54:58,820 --> 00:55:01,300
And, it's such a practical approach to so

1634
00:55:01,300 --> 00:55:02,039
many leadership

1635
00:55:02,420 --> 00:55:03,480
conversations. So

1636
00:55:03,795 --> 00:55:05,714
what's the next one? Yeah. Well, time we

1637
00:55:05,795 --> 00:55:07,234
then we were gonna talk about a little

1638
00:55:07,234 --> 00:55:08,295
bit about training.

1639
00:55:09,074 --> 00:55:10,835
This is a tough one. Yeah. Maybe let

1640
00:55:10,835 --> 00:55:12,434
me launch off on that. Like, how do

1641
00:55:12,675 --> 00:55:15,155
I love hearing how mister Perez just approach

1642
00:55:15,155 --> 00:55:17,155
a a typical zone conference. Like, what was

1643
00:55:17,155 --> 00:55:18,214
your approach there?

1644
00:55:18,639 --> 00:55:19,760
Well, once again,

1645
00:55:20,239 --> 00:55:22,719
you learn because I started off with all

1646
00:55:22,719 --> 00:55:26,260
my brilliant ideas and all my incredibly talented

1647
00:55:26,320 --> 00:55:28,739
things. Right? And I quickly learned, nope.

1648
00:55:29,199 --> 00:55:30,099
My missionaries

1649
00:55:30,480 --> 00:55:32,714
need to teach me this was happening in

1650
00:55:32,714 --> 00:55:34,154
the mission. This is what we need now.

1651
00:55:34,154 --> 00:55:34,894
And so

1652
00:55:35,355 --> 00:55:37,994
it shifted throughout the mission where it very

1653
00:55:37,994 --> 00:55:40,315
much became driven by our missionaries. What were

1654
00:55:40,315 --> 00:55:40,974
the needs

1655
00:55:41,355 --> 00:55:42,335
of the missionaries

1656
00:55:42,795 --> 00:55:45,760
as our leadership council would inform us? And

1657
00:55:45,760 --> 00:55:47,760
that would make the zone conference so much

1658
00:55:47,760 --> 00:55:49,920
more impactful because we're teaching to their needs

1659
00:55:49,920 --> 00:55:51,140
and not me thinking

1660
00:55:51,680 --> 00:55:53,680
I'm the leader in here. All all of

1661
00:55:53,680 --> 00:55:55,619
you listen to me and Yeah. You know?

1662
00:55:55,680 --> 00:55:57,039
So how how do you find out these

1663
00:55:57,039 --> 00:55:58,180
needs or or

1664
00:55:58,505 --> 00:56:00,265
survey the the group so that when you

1665
00:56:00,265 --> 00:56:01,545
go to the zone conference, you know the

1666
00:56:01,545 --> 00:56:02,684
needs to to address?

1667
00:56:03,144 --> 00:56:03,644
Time.

1668
00:56:03,945 --> 00:56:05,005
I talk to missionaries.

1669
00:56:05,465 --> 00:56:08,125
I talk to missionaries all the time. Interviews,

1670
00:56:08,664 --> 00:56:09,485
phone calls,

1671
00:56:09,945 --> 00:56:12,045
our leadership meetings. We took time.

1672
00:56:12,400 --> 00:56:15,119
We talked every week or to our leadership

1673
00:56:15,119 --> 00:56:18,800
team. It's comes back to time. Nice. Anything

1674
00:56:18,800 --> 00:56:20,820
else as far as training? Like,

1675
00:56:21,440 --> 00:56:22,900
how else did you you train?

1676
00:56:23,199 --> 00:56:25,519
Yeah. Training, this is just a little bit

1677
00:56:25,519 --> 00:56:27,114
of a pet peeve of mine is that

1678
00:56:27,114 --> 00:56:28,655
we have once again these traditions.

1679
00:56:29,195 --> 00:56:30,954
Now we have this idea that, k, we

1680
00:56:30,954 --> 00:56:33,295
get set apart. We have the keys. Revelation

1681
00:56:33,355 --> 00:56:34,015
will come,

1682
00:56:34,394 --> 00:56:36,875
and so we're gonna reinvent the wheel. We

1683
00:56:36,875 --> 00:56:39,375
have got to change that. It is unbelievable

1684
00:56:39,515 --> 00:56:41,980
to me that we'll call,

1685
00:56:42,359 --> 00:56:44,039
you a young adult bishop or a new

1686
00:56:44,039 --> 00:56:44,859
mission president,

1687
00:56:45,400 --> 00:56:45,900
and

1688
00:56:46,440 --> 00:56:47,960
we kinda think we gotta figure it all

1689
00:56:47,960 --> 00:56:48,619
by ourselves.

1690
00:56:49,000 --> 00:56:50,760
And as you're trying to figure it out

1691
00:56:50,760 --> 00:56:52,920
as a mission presence, a stake president, as

1692
00:56:52,920 --> 00:56:55,465
a dad, You're trying to figure it out.

1693
00:56:55,925 --> 00:56:58,885
How much damage is happening while I'm trying

1694
00:56:58,885 --> 00:57:01,125
to figure it out? How many mistakes do

1695
00:57:01,125 --> 00:57:03,525
I need to make? How many young adults

1696
00:57:03,525 --> 00:57:04,985
lives do I damage

1697
00:57:05,285 --> 00:57:07,800
before I sit back and say, that's not

1698
00:57:07,800 --> 00:57:08,300
working.

1699
00:57:08,840 --> 00:57:11,260
This is pushing them away. Right?

1700
00:57:11,559 --> 00:57:12,300
And so

1701
00:57:12,760 --> 00:57:13,820
I've just been surprised

1702
00:57:14,519 --> 00:57:15,980
to see how many

1703
00:57:16,360 --> 00:57:18,200
times we get in this leadership, and there's

1704
00:57:18,200 --> 00:57:20,875
this, like, unspoken thing, like, well, you're the

1705
00:57:20,875 --> 00:57:22,555
leader, and and and you do need to

1706
00:57:22,555 --> 00:57:24,555
do with your personality, and your way, and

1707
00:57:24,555 --> 00:57:26,394
your talents, and gifts. I a 100% agree

1708
00:57:26,394 --> 00:57:27,755
with that. But I don't care if you're

1709
00:57:27,755 --> 00:57:30,175
the primary teacher. Why would you not call

1710
00:57:30,235 --> 00:57:32,635
the very best primary teacher that you know

1711
00:57:32,635 --> 00:57:34,474
and say, how do I do this? What

1712
00:57:34,474 --> 00:57:37,570
worked? What didn't work? We don't have that

1713
00:57:37,570 --> 00:57:40,050
culture. This is why Leading Saints is absolutely

1714
00:57:40,050 --> 00:57:41,969
phenomenal. And, of course, we're preaching to the

1715
00:57:41,969 --> 00:57:43,190
choir. Oh, go on.

1716
00:57:44,690 --> 00:57:47,409
But I am surprised. Are you advocating for

1717
00:57:47,409 --> 00:57:48,630
this for Leading Saints?

1718
00:57:48,945 --> 00:57:51,344
We have got to be telling people about

1719
00:57:51,344 --> 00:57:53,985
this. I cannot believe how many people I

1720
00:57:53,985 --> 00:57:56,644
hear, oh, our work counselors are so bad.

1721
00:57:56,785 --> 00:57:58,945
They were our leading saints? No. What's that?

1722
00:57:58,945 --> 00:58:01,265
What? They got all kinds of podcasts about

1723
00:58:01,425 --> 00:58:02,644
just about work councils.

1724
00:58:03,269 --> 00:58:05,750
We have got to promote people. We have

1725
00:58:05,750 --> 00:58:07,989
to promote therapists. We have to promote books.

1726
00:58:07,989 --> 00:58:09,690
We have to promote podcasts.

1727
00:58:09,989 --> 00:58:12,710
Not for our own self promotion. I hate

1728
00:58:12,710 --> 00:58:15,510
that. I cannot stand. I have a hard

1729
00:58:15,510 --> 00:58:17,894
time. Right? I had to drag you there.

1730
00:58:17,894 --> 00:58:19,594
Yes. I don't like doing that.

1731
00:58:20,215 --> 00:58:22,695
But we need to promote people who have

1732
00:58:22,695 --> 00:58:23,195
ideas

1733
00:58:23,494 --> 00:58:23,994
and

1734
00:58:24,375 --> 00:58:26,155
welcome this open environment.

1735
00:58:26,535 --> 00:58:27,755
Us, men,

1736
00:58:28,295 --> 00:58:29,434
we have a problem

1737
00:58:30,055 --> 00:58:32,075
going to other men for counsel.

1738
00:58:32,589 --> 00:58:34,530
And that's gotta change because,

1739
00:58:35,069 --> 00:58:37,150
man, if if you're a plumber or a

1740
00:58:37,150 --> 00:58:39,329
dental surgeon, and now I'm a

1741
00:58:39,630 --> 00:58:40,210
a bishop,

1742
00:58:42,349 --> 00:58:44,670
I I'm counseling people, and I gotta figure

1743
00:58:44,670 --> 00:58:46,605
out addictions, and I gotta figure out false

1744
00:58:46,684 --> 00:58:48,625
doctrine. I gotta figure all this stuff out.

1745
00:58:48,844 --> 00:58:50,465
You will figure it out in time,

1746
00:58:50,925 --> 00:58:53,025
but how long does it take? And

1747
00:58:53,565 --> 00:58:55,405
how many of our ward meetings are stake

1748
00:58:55,405 --> 00:58:57,724
meetings? It's all about administration. How many of

1749
00:58:57,724 --> 00:58:59,585
you have been, as a bishop,

1750
00:58:59,900 --> 00:59:01,360
have gone to a stake

1751
00:59:01,660 --> 00:59:03,599
president meeting, leadership meeting,

1752
00:59:03,900 --> 00:59:05,980
and all you did was talk about, okay.

1753
00:59:05,980 --> 00:59:07,660
How do we use the doctrine? How do

1754
00:59:07,660 --> 00:59:09,500
we help people with false doctrine? How do

1755
00:59:09,500 --> 00:59:10,860
we help people with contention? How do we

1756
00:59:10,860 --> 00:59:12,880
help addictions? What are you doing with pornography?

1757
00:59:13,019 --> 00:59:13,980
What are you doing with this? What do

1758
00:59:13,980 --> 00:59:16,054
you? And we open it up to this

1759
00:59:16,054 --> 00:59:18,954
this format to really learn from each other

1760
00:59:19,255 --> 00:59:21,574
and have a men's therapy group with the

1761
00:59:21,574 --> 00:59:23,574
bishops and the stake press. Maybe I'm wrong,

1762
00:59:23,574 --> 00:59:24,635
but is that happening?

1763
00:59:25,094 --> 00:59:27,355
I don't think so. Yeah. Not much.

1764
00:59:27,894 --> 00:59:28,394
So

1765
00:59:28,800 --> 00:59:32,019
we should be getting mentors and finding people.

1766
00:59:32,640 --> 00:59:33,140
And

1767
00:59:33,599 --> 00:59:35,680
I'm just surprised that we struggle with that

1768
00:59:35,680 --> 00:59:36,260
so much.

1769
00:59:36,559 --> 00:59:39,039
And for some reason, we struggle with paying

1770
00:59:39,039 --> 00:59:40,820
for things when it comes to religion.

1771
00:59:41,119 --> 00:59:43,199
You know, like, we can't remote or we

1772
00:59:43,199 --> 00:59:45,574
can't buy things or and no one's trying

1773
00:59:45,574 --> 00:59:47,514
to sell a program or anything, but

1774
00:59:48,054 --> 00:59:49,894
the apostles write books and Selman does her

1775
00:59:49,894 --> 00:59:52,135
book, and we buy them. So what's wrong

1776
00:59:52,135 --> 00:59:55,034
with promoting Kirk Franklin's book? What's wrong with

1777
00:59:55,414 --> 00:59:57,034
I think I have bought probably

1778
00:59:57,590 --> 00:59:59,590
5 well, not that. I probably have bought

1779
00:59:59,590 --> 01:00:00,250
a 1,000

1780
01:00:00,710 --> 01:00:01,210
continuous

1781
01:00:01,829 --> 01:00:03,530
atonement books by Brad Wilcox.

1782
01:00:03,829 --> 01:00:05,690
I would love to meet that man someday.

1783
01:00:05,989 --> 01:00:07,369
That book has changed

1784
01:00:07,750 --> 01:00:09,849
so many lives. There's not a better book

1785
01:00:10,150 --> 01:00:12,730
applicable book about the atonement of Jesus Christ.

1786
01:00:12,885 --> 01:00:14,885
Do we promote? Do we do we encourage?

1787
01:00:14,885 --> 01:00:16,885
Do we give? We just gotta do a

1788
01:00:16,885 --> 01:00:18,105
better job at that

1789
01:00:18,485 --> 01:00:20,644
and learn from each other instead of trying

1790
01:00:20,644 --> 01:00:21,864
to figure it out.

1791
01:00:22,164 --> 01:00:25,125
I had Mike Strong was the mission president

1792
01:00:25,125 --> 01:00:27,809
before I, was the mission president. Of your

1793
01:00:27,809 --> 01:00:30,289
mission. My mission now. And it was tough

1794
01:00:30,289 --> 01:00:31,430
to follow him because

1795
01:00:32,050 --> 01:00:33,410
the strongs are just some of the best

1796
01:00:33,410 --> 01:00:34,469
people on the planet.

1797
01:00:34,849 --> 01:00:37,010
And there's just kind of that unspoken thing

1798
01:00:37,010 --> 01:00:39,250
that I'm the new mission president. You don't

1799
01:00:39,250 --> 01:00:41,170
talk to the old mission president. Right? You

1800
01:00:41,170 --> 01:00:43,635
had your couple hours with him, and then

1801
01:00:43,635 --> 01:00:46,835
that's it. Well, tough. This guy knows how

1802
01:00:46,835 --> 01:00:48,355
to be a mission president in my mission,

1803
01:00:48,355 --> 01:00:49,735
and I would call him frequently.

1804
01:00:50,195 --> 01:00:52,035
And he mentored me. He was so good

1805
01:00:52,035 --> 01:00:54,300
at not crossing lines, but he mentored me.

1806
01:00:54,539 --> 01:00:56,140
And I remember one of the things he

1807
01:00:56,140 --> 01:00:57,820
taught me that was so powerful is he

1808
01:00:57,820 --> 01:01:00,380
says, Rob, you just have to listen to

1809
01:01:00,380 --> 01:01:01,280
their stories.

1810
01:01:02,059 --> 01:01:04,000
Because when you hear their stories,

1811
01:01:04,860 --> 01:01:07,260
you will love them. You will fight for

1812
01:01:07,260 --> 01:01:08,960
them. You will be an advocate.

1813
01:01:09,635 --> 01:01:10,135
So

1814
01:01:10,594 --> 01:01:11,255
I am

1815
01:01:11,635 --> 01:01:13,974
at the point of sending a missionary home

1816
01:01:14,114 --> 01:01:16,835
because he's just disobedient, and he's a clown.

1817
01:01:16,835 --> 01:01:19,094
He's a goof off, and he's just distracting.

1818
01:01:19,554 --> 01:01:21,554
I can't keep companions with them, and I've

1819
01:01:21,554 --> 01:01:22,214
had it.

1820
01:01:22,530 --> 01:01:23,030
And

1821
01:01:23,650 --> 01:01:25,489
it's time. It's time to send him home.

1822
01:01:25,489 --> 01:01:27,010
So he's coming into my office for a

1823
01:01:27,010 --> 01:01:29,170
special interview, and I'm gonna tell him you're

1824
01:01:29,170 --> 01:01:29,910
going home.

1825
01:01:30,449 --> 01:01:32,849
And good old Mike Strong teaches me this

1826
01:01:32,849 --> 01:01:35,989
about listen to their stories. So I thought,

1827
01:01:36,315 --> 01:01:38,635
well, I'm sending him home, but I'll listen

1828
01:01:38,635 --> 01:01:39,454
to his story.

1829
01:01:39,914 --> 01:01:41,614
And I listened to his story

1830
01:01:42,474 --> 01:01:45,195
from the poorest place you can imagine in

1831
01:01:45,195 --> 01:01:47,295
Peru. No dad in the picture,

1832
01:01:47,675 --> 01:01:48,815
living on the streets,

1833
01:01:49,434 --> 01:01:51,534
sexual abuse, physical abuse.

1834
01:01:52,299 --> 01:01:56,000
Mom is working, never around. Grandparents racing him.

1835
01:01:56,299 --> 01:01:58,380
I mean, I listened to this young man's

1836
01:01:58,380 --> 01:02:00,619
story, and that just hit me. He needs

1837
01:02:00,619 --> 01:02:01,359
a dad.

1838
01:02:01,819 --> 01:02:04,380
He needs me to fight for him. And

1839
01:02:04,380 --> 01:02:06,079
so he came into my office,

1840
01:02:06,525 --> 01:02:08,525
pretty much ready to go home, and he

1841
01:02:08,525 --> 01:02:09,424
left my office

1842
01:02:09,885 --> 01:02:11,585
being called to be a district leader.

1843
01:02:11,885 --> 01:02:12,385
Because

1844
01:02:12,844 --> 01:02:15,984
when you know the stories of peep and

1845
01:02:16,125 --> 01:02:18,704
that happened not because I'm wonderful, it's because

1846
01:02:18,844 --> 01:02:21,025
Mike Strong taught me some principles

1847
01:02:21,500 --> 01:02:23,579
on how to be a better leader. And

1848
01:02:23,579 --> 01:02:23,980
I just

1849
01:02:24,539 --> 01:02:25,519
we have to do

1850
01:02:25,980 --> 01:02:29,099
that better, I think. I wanna just open

1851
01:02:29,099 --> 01:02:30,859
it up for the audience. Is anybody wanna

1852
01:02:30,859 --> 01:02:32,619
ask a question, a follow-up question? It can

1853
01:02:32,619 --> 01:02:34,619
be related to something we've talked about or

1854
01:02:34,619 --> 01:02:36,239
something different. Here we go.

1855
01:02:36,785 --> 01:02:37,445
Here it comes.

1856
01:02:38,144 --> 01:02:39,425
I just want to make the com oh,

1857
01:02:39,425 --> 01:02:41,125
this is a speaker. This is cool.

1858
01:02:41,505 --> 01:02:42,965
I just wanted to say,

1859
01:02:43,985 --> 01:02:46,785
president and and use leaders that It's Robert.

1860
01:02:46,785 --> 01:02:48,945
Robert's no president. Robert anymore. Yeah. I was

1861
01:02:48,945 --> 01:02:51,525
just gonna say, I love the idea of

1862
01:02:51,900 --> 01:02:53,519
a state priesthood council

1863
01:02:54,219 --> 01:02:57,119
with your state presidency, your high council,

1864
01:02:57,819 --> 01:02:59,039
the whole body of the priesthood,

1865
01:02:59,659 --> 01:03:02,219
having an open dialogue like you've discussed. Like,

1866
01:03:02,219 --> 01:03:04,539
how was your ward handling pornography? How was

1867
01:03:04,539 --> 01:03:06,079
your how was your ward handling

1868
01:03:06,585 --> 01:03:07,945
masturbation? You know, how are you handling that

1869
01:03:07,945 --> 01:03:09,565
with your youth? I love that dialogue

1870
01:03:10,264 --> 01:03:11,804
to think, like you said, that men

1871
01:03:12,105 --> 01:03:13,644
probably have a little bit of a challenge

1872
01:03:14,105 --> 01:03:16,045
kind of having a rapport with each other.

1873
01:03:16,184 --> 01:03:17,545
I've tried to bring some of those kinds

1874
01:03:17,545 --> 01:03:19,244
of things up in stake meetings before,

1875
01:03:19,579 --> 01:03:22,300
and again I'm not pointing fingers, but generally

1876
01:03:22,300 --> 01:03:24,239
speaking having an open dialogue people

1877
01:03:24,780 --> 01:03:25,679
kinda get nervous,

1878
01:03:26,059 --> 01:03:28,219
and they don't I think the stake president

1879
01:03:28,219 --> 01:03:30,460
or whatever, they may be too nervous to

1880
01:03:30,460 --> 01:03:32,400
have a dialogue that is that open.

1881
01:03:32,945 --> 01:03:34,385
But the idea of an open dialogue, I

1882
01:03:34,385 --> 01:03:35,764
think in a lot of those circumstances,

1883
01:03:36,704 --> 01:03:38,164
in a stake meeting, whatever,

1884
01:03:39,025 --> 01:03:39,605
can bring

1885
01:03:40,224 --> 01:03:41,204
fruitful ideas

1886
01:03:41,585 --> 01:03:42,565
that can bring,

1887
01:03:42,945 --> 01:03:44,885
you know, something that you can do

1888
01:03:45,184 --> 01:03:45,925
together openly,

1889
01:03:46,579 --> 01:03:48,019
take your guard down and say, hey. How

1890
01:03:48,019 --> 01:03:49,460
can we learn from each other, from other

1891
01:03:49,460 --> 01:03:52,840
wards, other, you know, other priesthood members, other

1892
01:03:52,900 --> 01:03:55,000
mem sisters of the Relief Society, whatever,

1893
01:03:55,699 --> 01:03:58,179
to have a conversation that's open about how

1894
01:03:58,179 --> 01:04:00,500
can we learn about, you know, principle a,

1895
01:04:00,500 --> 01:04:02,445
principle b, principle c, and just have it

1896
01:04:02,445 --> 01:04:04,445
be open and see where it goes. In

1897
01:04:04,445 --> 01:04:07,025
general, like I've said, for the most part,

1898
01:04:07,085 --> 01:04:08,285
when I've tried to do that in the

1899
01:04:08,285 --> 01:04:10,684
stake meeting, most of the leaders are pretty

1900
01:04:10,684 --> 01:04:13,265
nervous and pretty well shut down the openness

1901
01:04:13,565 --> 01:04:15,825
context of the meeting in general.

1902
01:04:16,309 --> 01:04:18,309
We definitely need to be more vulnerable. That's

1903
01:04:18,309 --> 01:04:19,909
for sure. But, I mean, what about the

1904
01:04:19,909 --> 01:04:20,409
discussion?

1905
01:04:20,710 --> 01:04:22,150
When should you have the sacrament? When should

1906
01:04:22,150 --> 01:04:23,829
you not have the sacrament? When is the

1907
01:04:23,829 --> 01:04:26,150
sacrament withheld? When is it not withheld? How

1908
01:04:26,150 --> 01:04:27,429
do you handle that with youth? How do

1909
01:04:27,429 --> 01:04:28,550
you handle that with the young adults? I

1910
01:04:28,550 --> 01:04:30,329
mean, there are some hard questions.

1911
01:04:31,094 --> 01:04:33,094
And I bet you in one stake, how

1912
01:04:33,094 --> 01:04:35,094
they're doing that is totally different from word

1913
01:04:35,094 --> 01:04:35,755
to word.

1914
01:04:36,215 --> 01:04:37,734
And those are the kinds of things that

1915
01:04:37,734 --> 01:04:39,914
are crushing people. I mean,

1916
01:04:40,215 --> 01:04:40,695
I have a

1917
01:04:41,574 --> 01:04:42,875
we had you know,

1918
01:04:43,369 --> 01:04:45,269
this is what's right in the eyes. I

1919
01:04:45,289 --> 01:04:47,050
hate to say it like this because it

1920
01:04:47,130 --> 01:04:48,730
once again, it makes me look like I've

1921
01:04:48,730 --> 01:04:50,329
got it figured out, and I I don't.

1922
01:04:50,329 --> 01:04:52,969
I've just learned the hard way. But, you

1923
01:04:52,969 --> 01:04:55,449
know, we were very compassionate and loving, and

1924
01:04:55,449 --> 01:04:58,295
and there was we tried to minimize the

1925
01:04:58,295 --> 01:04:58,795
shame

1926
01:04:59,094 --> 01:04:59,755
of problems.

1927
01:05:00,614 --> 01:05:02,775
But I have I have multiple missionaries. I

1928
01:05:02,775 --> 01:05:04,694
had a missionary just went home with me,

1929
01:05:04,694 --> 01:05:06,234
so he's been home for 3 weeks.

1930
01:05:06,614 --> 01:05:09,094
He gets home. He's super excited. Right? He

1931
01:05:09,094 --> 01:05:10,855
wants to work hard in his word. He

1932
01:05:10,855 --> 01:05:11,994
wants to go to the temple.

1933
01:05:12,500 --> 01:05:15,380
He messes up and masturbates once. He's from

1934
01:05:15,380 --> 01:05:15,880
Peru,

1935
01:05:16,260 --> 01:05:17,460
and he goes in and talks to his

1936
01:05:17,460 --> 01:05:17,960
bishop.

1937
01:05:18,739 --> 01:05:20,280
Now what is his anticipation?

1938
01:05:20,739 --> 01:05:22,819
What what do you think he thinks kind

1939
01:05:22,819 --> 01:05:25,284
of the reaction the bishop's gonna be? Probably,

1940
01:05:25,284 --> 01:05:27,605
he's thinking he's gonna have a similar reaction

1941
01:05:27,605 --> 01:05:28,585
that he's had with

1942
01:05:28,965 --> 01:05:30,885
me. Well, that bishop said, give me your

1943
01:05:30,885 --> 01:05:31,704
temple recommend.

1944
01:05:32,085 --> 01:05:33,925
You're not taking the sacrament for 5 weeks

1945
01:05:33,925 --> 01:05:36,344
or 5 months. I'm sorry. 5 months,

1946
01:05:37,000 --> 01:05:38,380
and you can't have a calling.

1947
01:05:38,760 --> 01:05:39,260
Culture.

1948
01:05:39,960 --> 01:05:43,239
So, you know, we're not talking about some

1949
01:05:43,239 --> 01:05:45,079
of that stuff. And you think, oh, that's

1950
01:05:45,079 --> 01:05:45,900
in Peru.

1951
01:05:46,440 --> 01:05:48,440
Oh, let me tell you how many return

1952
01:05:48,440 --> 01:05:50,140
missionaries I have here in Utah

1953
01:05:50,594 --> 01:05:51,335
that have

1954
01:05:52,114 --> 01:05:52,775
had harsh

1955
01:05:53,315 --> 01:05:53,815
reactions

1956
01:05:54,114 --> 01:05:57,335
from bishops. We jump right into the consequences.

1957
01:05:57,635 --> 01:06:00,275
We jump right into no. What let time

1958
01:06:00,275 --> 01:06:02,195
out. Let's talk about the atonement. Let's talk

1959
01:06:02,195 --> 01:06:04,514
about Jesus Christ. Let's talk about love and

1960
01:06:04,514 --> 01:06:07,429
hope, and let's talk about grace and mercy.

1961
01:06:08,050 --> 01:06:09,429
I've got a quote in here.

1962
01:06:09,730 --> 01:06:10,230
Andy,

1963
01:06:10,769 --> 01:06:11,269
Stanley,

1964
01:06:12,050 --> 01:06:12,550
evangelical

1965
01:06:13,090 --> 01:06:13,590
preacher.

1966
01:06:13,969 --> 01:06:15,989
Maybe it's what I should have been. But

1967
01:06:16,769 --> 01:06:19,875
he said listen to this. When theology becomes

1968
01:06:19,875 --> 01:06:21,335
an obstacle to mercy,

1969
01:06:21,715 --> 01:06:23,094
adjust your theology.

1970
01:06:23,635 --> 01:06:26,035
Let me read that again. When theology becomes

1971
01:06:26,035 --> 01:06:27,974
an obstacle to mercy, adjust

1972
01:06:28,275 --> 01:06:29,094
your theology.

1973
01:06:29,394 --> 01:06:31,394
Once again, I'm not talking about the core

1974
01:06:31,394 --> 01:06:31,894
doctrine,

1975
01:06:32,434 --> 01:06:32,934
but

1976
01:06:33,339 --> 01:06:35,819
we have got to have more mercy and

1977
01:06:35,819 --> 01:06:38,380
grace and helping them connect to Jesus Christ

1978
01:06:38,380 --> 01:06:41,019
because all that does is takes a return

1979
01:06:41,019 --> 01:06:42,880
missionary and says, ciao ciao.

1980
01:06:43,179 --> 01:06:45,579
I'm I'm out. Anything else as far as

1981
01:06:45,579 --> 01:06:48,000
the training? Do we cover that pretty well?

1982
01:06:48,315 --> 01:06:50,155
Yeah. Take us to the next tee. Seek

1983
01:06:50,155 --> 01:06:53,695
mentors. Go find yeah. And don't be scared

1984
01:06:53,755 --> 01:06:55,214
to have your children

1985
01:06:55,755 --> 01:06:58,315
seek mentors outside of your home. Of course,

1986
01:06:58,315 --> 01:07:00,414
you gotta be careful with that. But,

1987
01:07:00,809 --> 01:07:01,309
man,

1988
01:07:02,010 --> 01:07:03,550
what would happen if

1989
01:07:03,930 --> 01:07:06,570
to create experiences for your kids to have

1990
01:07:06,570 --> 01:07:07,630
outside mentors?

1991
01:07:08,090 --> 01:07:09,769
Of course, we have the organization of the

1992
01:07:09,769 --> 01:07:10,750
church, but

1993
01:07:11,130 --> 01:07:13,335
we're gonna do some exciting things. We're gonna

1994
01:07:13,335 --> 01:07:15,574
do worries retreats with young adults. We're gonna

1995
01:07:15,574 --> 01:07:16,795
do humanitarian

1996
01:07:17,094 --> 01:07:19,574
trips with young adults and youth that are

1997
01:07:19,574 --> 01:07:22,635
not your typical humanitarian trips. We're gonna have

1998
01:07:23,014 --> 01:07:23,514
incredible

1999
01:07:23,894 --> 01:07:26,340
people. It will be a mini education week.

2000
01:07:26,420 --> 01:07:29,380
We're gonna do some exciting things. Look for

2001
01:07:29,380 --> 01:07:30,599
opportunities like that.

2002
01:07:30,900 --> 01:07:34,119
Be involved with upper promote opportunities like that.

2003
01:07:34,340 --> 01:07:36,200
We need outside mentors.

2004
01:07:36,739 --> 01:07:38,820
It's hard. I think the hardest thing for

2005
01:07:38,820 --> 01:07:41,015
my wife and I my daughter can't repeat

2006
01:07:41,015 --> 01:07:43,255
this. I got my wonderful daughter here. She

2007
01:07:43,255 --> 01:07:44,715
is oh my goodness.

2008
01:07:45,095 --> 01:07:47,015
She is just like her mom. I'm not

2009
01:07:47,015 --> 01:07:48,474
a prophet in my own home,

2010
01:07:48,934 --> 01:07:51,835
and that's true. And so you need people

2011
01:07:52,230 --> 01:07:55,110
to be second, 3rd, 4th witnesses, right, to

2012
01:07:55,110 --> 01:07:56,869
what you're trying to teach them now. Tell

2013
01:07:56,869 --> 01:07:57,769
me about team.

2014
01:07:58,070 --> 01:07:59,750
That's the next t. Right? Well, I was

2015
01:07:59,750 --> 01:08:01,989
just talking to elder Harrison, you know, his

2016
01:08:01,989 --> 01:08:04,630
experience of telling me, you know, being honest

2017
01:08:04,630 --> 01:08:05,289
with me.

2018
01:08:05,635 --> 01:08:06,614
I'm telling you,

2019
01:08:07,235 --> 01:08:09,015
we have to have the young adults

2020
01:08:09,474 --> 01:08:10,215
in council.

2021
01:08:10,595 --> 01:08:12,835
They've got to be involved in what's going

2022
01:08:12,835 --> 01:08:13,974
on in the wards.

2023
01:08:14,355 --> 01:08:17,255
I am still surprised how many in Utah

2024
01:08:17,730 --> 01:08:20,850
are not supporting young adult programs. You're hanging

2025
01:08:20,850 --> 01:08:22,630
on to your young adults in your wards.

2026
01:08:23,010 --> 01:08:24,710
This is the most incredible

2027
01:08:25,090 --> 01:08:26,949
program there is, but

2028
01:08:27,489 --> 01:08:29,570
we need to invite the young adults to

2029
01:08:29,570 --> 01:08:30,230
the table.

2030
01:08:30,685 --> 01:08:33,324
Once again, we come time sometimes look at

2031
01:08:33,324 --> 01:08:35,164
them as the problem, and they're all leaving

2032
01:08:35,164 --> 01:08:37,324
the church and all the got this and

2033
01:08:37,324 --> 01:08:39,744
that. They're gonna help us find the solutions.

2034
01:08:40,284 --> 01:08:42,465
And so having them in a ward council,

2035
01:08:42,780 --> 01:08:44,460
if you do have young adults in your

2036
01:08:44,460 --> 01:08:46,380
ward, are they in a calling so they're

2037
01:08:46,380 --> 01:08:47,760
involved in your ward councils?

2038
01:08:48,300 --> 01:08:50,380
Like, that's part of the team is they've

2039
01:08:50,380 --> 01:08:52,780
got to be part of the team. Part

2040
01:08:52,780 --> 01:08:55,034
of that enabling dynamic that you alluded to

2041
01:08:55,034 --> 01:08:56,875
earlier as well. Right? And we have and

2042
01:08:56,875 --> 01:08:58,314
this is this is what's great about these

2043
01:08:58,314 --> 01:09:00,475
young adults that I think my generation struggles

2044
01:09:00,475 --> 01:09:02,555
with. For crying out loud, we have got

2045
01:09:02,555 --> 01:09:04,895
to stop having yes men in this church.

2046
01:09:05,354 --> 01:09:06,335
Right? Yes, sir.

2047
01:09:08,489 --> 01:09:11,449
We gotta have people that, 1, the leader

2048
01:09:11,449 --> 01:09:13,550
has to create an environment where it's comfortable

2049
01:09:14,090 --> 01:09:16,010
to talk and to challenge and to talk

2050
01:09:16,010 --> 01:09:18,170
about things, but just yes men. Okay. That's

2051
01:09:18,170 --> 01:09:19,689
what we're gonna do. Okay. Let's do that.

2052
01:09:19,689 --> 01:09:21,494
Let's do that. Let's do that. Instead of,

2053
01:09:21,574 --> 01:09:23,255
nope. I don't that's not gonna work or

2054
01:09:23,814 --> 01:09:26,555
and this generation will do that. We have

2055
01:09:27,015 --> 01:09:29,835
so many in the church that are afraid

2056
01:09:29,975 --> 01:09:31,914
of, I don't know what, but

2057
01:09:32,215 --> 01:09:35,310
instead of saying, k. Let's can we think

2058
01:09:35,310 --> 01:09:36,909
about this? And there's another way of looking

2059
01:09:36,909 --> 01:09:38,510
at this, or maybe we should go talk

2060
01:09:38,510 --> 01:09:40,350
to young adults about this, or how do

2061
01:09:40,350 --> 01:09:43,149
we include this? And start challenging things a

2062
01:09:43,149 --> 01:09:45,710
little bit more. Sometimes we're yes men because

2063
01:09:45,710 --> 01:09:46,770
we're worried about,

2064
01:09:47,314 --> 01:09:49,314
people are worried sometimes worried about the next

2065
01:09:49,314 --> 01:09:49,814
calling.

2066
01:09:50,354 --> 01:09:52,595
I sat next to a general one of

2067
01:09:52,595 --> 01:09:55,335
the presidents of the 70 in a mission

2068
01:09:55,395 --> 01:09:56,935
retreat that we had once.

2069
01:09:57,555 --> 01:09:59,074
And I got to sit next to him

2070
01:09:59,074 --> 01:10:00,199
at lunch. And

2071
01:10:00,579 --> 01:10:02,180
so there you are. Right? And you're sitting

2072
01:10:02,180 --> 01:10:04,439
next to this this president of the 70,

2073
01:10:04,979 --> 01:10:06,359
and you're asking yourself,

2074
01:10:06,659 --> 01:10:08,420
what am I gonna be like? And he

2075
01:10:08,500 --> 01:10:09,779
his first thing he says to me, he

2076
01:10:09,779 --> 01:10:11,380
says, president Farrell, do you know what my

2077
01:10:11,380 --> 01:10:14,055
number one responsibility is as one of the

2078
01:10:14,055 --> 01:10:16,135
presidents of the seventy? I said, I have

2079
01:10:16,135 --> 01:10:17,675
no idea. He said,

2080
01:10:18,135 --> 01:10:19,594
it's to find general authorities.

2081
01:10:20,215 --> 01:10:21,914
So I'm gonna be super vulnerable.

2082
01:10:22,454 --> 01:10:23,194
Do I

2083
01:10:23,494 --> 01:10:25,895
try to impress the guy? Because, you know,

2084
01:10:25,895 --> 01:10:28,409
that's the next thing. And if, oh, if

2085
01:10:28,409 --> 01:10:30,170
I'm a general authority, well, then, you know,

2086
01:10:30,170 --> 01:10:30,670
I've

2087
01:10:31,050 --> 01:10:32,189
the validation

2088
01:10:33,050 --> 01:10:35,529
so messed up. This validation we have in

2089
01:10:35,529 --> 01:10:38,250
the church that somehow a calling means that

2090
01:10:38,250 --> 01:10:39,869
we're better or more important.

2091
01:10:40,250 --> 01:10:42,350
We're seeking validation in such

2092
01:10:42,935 --> 01:10:45,895
sad ways in the church. But because of

2093
01:10:45,895 --> 01:10:48,135
that, by being too honest, am I off

2094
01:10:48,135 --> 01:10:50,234
base here? Because of that,

2095
01:10:50,534 --> 01:10:52,854
we're not being honest in our wards, in

2096
01:10:52,854 --> 01:10:55,359
our stakes, and with our leaders. Right? And

2097
01:10:55,359 --> 01:10:57,279
we gotta drop that a little bit. K.

2098
01:10:57,279 --> 01:10:59,439
Awesome. Anything else with team? No. No. That's

2099
01:10:59,439 --> 01:11:01,199
good. Any other questions come up? Here we

2100
01:11:01,199 --> 01:11:02,500
come. Oh.

2101
01:11:04,000 --> 01:11:06,579
Bring it to you. Don't worry about that.

2102
01:11:07,545 --> 01:11:09,465
I had an experience this week. I approached

2103
01:11:09,465 --> 01:11:11,085
my bishop, and I said, bishop,

2104
01:11:11,864 --> 01:11:14,344
I've just been thinking about something. For the

2105
01:11:14,344 --> 01:11:16,664
last 10 years in the church, we always

2106
01:11:16,664 --> 01:11:19,645
thank the organist, the chorister, and the deacons.

2107
01:11:20,930 --> 01:11:21,670
What if

2108
01:11:22,289 --> 01:11:24,530
we thank the missionaries for going out this

2109
01:11:24,530 --> 01:11:25,030
week?

2110
01:11:25,570 --> 01:11:26,470
What if

2111
01:11:27,250 --> 01:11:29,590
we thanked a primary teacher?

2112
01:11:30,369 --> 01:11:31,189
What if

2113
01:11:31,810 --> 01:11:33,329
and he shot me a text, and he

2114
01:11:33,329 --> 01:11:35,270
said, I I'm not gonna change.

2115
01:11:36,315 --> 01:11:38,574
Keep on it. You're doing great. Yeah. It's

2116
01:11:40,074 --> 01:11:41,914
it's tough sometimes. Yeah. It takes time to

2117
01:11:41,914 --> 01:11:43,375
change traditions and habits.

2118
01:11:44,395 --> 01:11:45,854
So on that same vein,

2119
01:11:46,795 --> 01:11:47,935
you have a ward

2120
01:11:48,235 --> 01:11:50,095
that they've always done the same

2121
01:11:50,590 --> 01:11:51,409
ward party,

2122
01:11:53,789 --> 01:11:55,170
and they spend

2123
01:11:55,550 --> 01:11:56,770
far too much money.

2124
01:11:57,149 --> 01:11:59,229
And as a stake president, you go and

2125
01:11:59,229 --> 01:11:59,969
you say,

2126
01:12:00,590 --> 01:12:01,729
do something different.

2127
01:12:02,270 --> 01:12:03,569
And the bishop says,

2128
01:12:03,885 --> 01:12:06,364
I can't because people in my ward will

2129
01:12:06,364 --> 01:12:06,864
revolt.

2130
01:12:07,645 --> 01:12:10,685
Because we've always done a ward party like

2131
01:12:10,685 --> 01:12:11,185
this.

2132
01:12:11,885 --> 01:12:13,824
And if you will, I've asked,

2133
01:12:14,284 --> 01:12:16,465
well, do you bring Christ into the party?

2134
01:12:16,710 --> 01:12:18,550
Do you bring is there is there a

2135
01:12:18,869 --> 01:12:20,489
no. We can't change anything.

2136
01:12:21,109 --> 01:12:22,329
How do you

2137
01:12:23,430 --> 01:12:25,369
get rid of the people that

2138
01:12:25,750 --> 01:12:27,449
how do we kill golden calf?

2139
01:12:29,350 --> 01:12:31,210
In in legal ways, of course.

2140
01:12:32,925 --> 01:12:34,524
Yeah. Well, I think you see this in

2141
01:12:34,524 --> 01:12:36,125
the church. Right? Look in the last look

2142
01:12:36,125 --> 01:12:37,645
just in the last 10 years, how much

2143
01:12:37,645 --> 01:12:39,805
things have changed in the church. I think

2144
01:12:39,805 --> 01:12:41,824
we're making a lot of progress,

2145
01:12:42,364 --> 01:12:45,185
but also leaders have got to be bold

2146
01:12:45,564 --> 01:12:47,185
to call bold leaders.

2147
01:12:47,630 --> 01:12:49,949
We call the same 10% people over and

2148
01:12:49,949 --> 01:12:50,849
over and over again.

2149
01:12:51,229 --> 01:12:53,710
Call some new people that are bold and

2150
01:12:53,710 --> 01:12:55,710
courageous and are gonna maybe shake things up

2151
01:12:55,710 --> 01:12:57,710
a little bit. We gotta be flipping some

2152
01:12:57,710 --> 01:13:00,109
tables. We gotta be challenging them some things.

2153
01:13:00,109 --> 01:13:02,274
And if it Wait. You gotta tie in

2154
01:13:02,274 --> 01:13:03,314
the mic or it won't get down to

2155
01:13:03,314 --> 01:13:06,054
the recording. I've called plenty of new people,

2156
01:13:06,755 --> 01:13:08,054
and they do nothing.

2157
01:13:08,675 --> 01:13:10,614
I'm a stake president. I've called

2158
01:13:11,314 --> 01:13:14,454
young high councilman, old high councilman, past bishops.

2159
01:13:14,780 --> 01:13:17,260
I've called elders quorum presidents. Are you stake

2160
01:13:17,260 --> 01:13:19,039
president? Uh-huh. That nobody

2161
01:13:19,739 --> 01:13:21,360
I called the guy in the corner,

2162
01:13:21,739 --> 01:13:22,880
and they do nothing.

2163
01:13:23,500 --> 01:13:25,340
They just do the same thing, and I

2164
01:13:25,340 --> 01:13:28,239
tell them, take a risk. Do something different,

2165
01:13:28,619 --> 01:13:29,520
and they don't.

2166
01:13:29,994 --> 01:13:32,475
I totally hear you, and I try. But

2167
01:13:32,475 --> 01:13:33,594
you know what? I go back to the

2168
01:13:33,594 --> 01:13:36,255
10% because I know what they'll do something.

2169
01:13:36,795 --> 01:13:38,715
I mean, that's certainly valid, and I wish

2170
01:13:38,715 --> 01:13:41,274
I had just some wonderful response to that.

2171
01:13:41,274 --> 01:13:43,649
Just gotta keep trying. And this is where

2172
01:13:43,649 --> 01:13:44,949
I think once again,

2173
01:13:45,409 --> 01:13:46,949
are you calling younger people?

2174
01:13:47,409 --> 01:13:49,090
I call the I just call the 28

2175
01:13:49,090 --> 01:13:49,909
year old bishop.

2176
01:13:51,090 --> 01:13:52,789
And? And you're being awesome,

2177
01:13:53,649 --> 01:13:55,755
but I've called the same on the high

2178
01:13:55,755 --> 01:13:56,255
council

2179
01:13:58,154 --> 01:14:00,094
and they've even gotten to speak.

2180
01:14:03,034 --> 01:14:04,954
I've called 65 year old men that have

2181
01:14:04,954 --> 01:14:06,015
been commissioned before,

2182
01:14:07,034 --> 01:14:09,109
and they're their boats on the lawn.

2183
01:14:09,729 --> 01:14:11,590
And but I I but if I call

2184
01:14:11,729 --> 01:14:12,869
the past state president,

2185
01:14:13,890 --> 01:14:14,789
you know what?

2186
01:14:15,250 --> 01:14:17,170
Things get done. I think what it what

2187
01:14:17,170 --> 01:14:18,710
what comes back to is,

2188
01:14:19,409 --> 01:14:20,929
it's not just the young adults that are

2189
01:14:20,929 --> 01:14:23,395
struggling with connection with Jesus Christ. It's the

2190
01:14:23,395 --> 01:14:24,695
membership of this church.

2191
01:14:25,155 --> 01:14:27,574
And I do not like the word motivate.

2192
01:14:28,114 --> 01:14:29,715
Jessica and I are gonna talk about that.

2193
01:14:30,195 --> 01:14:30,695
Because

2194
01:14:31,395 --> 01:14:34,034
motivate is external. Right? And what you're doing

2195
01:14:34,034 --> 01:14:35,635
is all these external things to try to

2196
01:14:35,635 --> 01:14:37,239
get people to motivate to change things, and

2197
01:14:37,239 --> 01:14:39,159
it doesn't really work. That's not very effective.

2198
01:14:39,159 --> 01:14:40,920
Right? I go to a zone conference that

2199
01:14:40,920 --> 01:14:42,780
I can I can be the greatest cheerleader,

2200
01:14:42,840 --> 01:14:44,760
and I can motivate them, and they're walking

2201
01:14:44,760 --> 01:14:46,760
out of there? We're gonna baptize the world,

2202
01:14:46,760 --> 01:14:48,280
and then tonight, we're just right back to

2203
01:14:48,280 --> 01:14:50,284
the same things again. Right? It's

2204
01:14:50,664 --> 01:14:51,164
inspiration.

2205
01:14:51,625 --> 01:14:54,425
I've got to breathe life into their soul,

2206
01:14:54,425 --> 01:14:56,204
and we have to do that

2207
01:14:56,744 --> 01:14:58,984
through a connection of Jesus Christ. I was

2208
01:14:58,984 --> 01:15:00,425
gonna finish with this story, but let me

2209
01:15:00,425 --> 01:15:01,880
just share it now. And I I don't

2210
01:15:01,880 --> 01:15:03,319
even I've looked for this. I don't even

2211
01:15:03,319 --> 01:15:05,500
know if it's a correct story or not.

2212
01:15:05,560 --> 01:15:08,359
So it might not be historically correct. Doesn't

2213
01:15:08,359 --> 01:15:11,399
matter. The principle is powerful. K? The story

2214
01:15:11,399 --> 01:15:13,000
goes that there was a group of people

2215
01:15:13,000 --> 01:15:14,359
in World War 2 that were in a

2216
01:15:14,359 --> 01:15:15,579
concentration camp,

2217
01:15:15,975 --> 01:15:18,135
and they were planning an escape. And in

2218
01:15:18,135 --> 01:15:20,215
this group was a young mother that had

2219
01:15:20,215 --> 01:15:22,454
a child, and her husband has had been

2220
01:15:22,454 --> 01:15:25,255
killed. And there was an elderly man that

2221
01:15:25,255 --> 01:15:27,335
kinda became a father like figure to this

2222
01:15:27,335 --> 01:15:30,369
woman, Looked over her, protected the baby, gave

2223
01:15:30,369 --> 01:15:32,449
extra rations to her, was really caring for

2224
01:15:32,449 --> 01:15:35,189
her. Well, they were part of this escape.

2225
01:15:35,729 --> 01:15:37,810
And the night came, and I don't know

2226
01:15:37,810 --> 01:15:39,189
the details, and they

2227
01:15:39,649 --> 01:15:41,635
planned their escape, And they had to run

2228
01:15:41,635 --> 01:15:43,175
across this empty field

2229
01:15:43,475 --> 01:15:44,835
to get to the tree line to have

2230
01:15:44,835 --> 01:15:47,074
a chance for escape. I can't even imagine

2231
01:15:47,074 --> 01:15:48,994
the feeling that would be running across that

2232
01:15:48,994 --> 01:15:49,814
empty field

2233
01:15:50,194 --> 01:15:52,354
and then get to the tree line. Well,

2234
01:15:52,354 --> 01:15:53,954
they they get to the trees, and there's

2235
01:15:53,954 --> 01:15:56,034
that surge of hope that maybe they're gonna

2236
01:15:56,034 --> 01:15:57,770
be able to escape. And as they hit

2237
01:15:57,770 --> 01:16:00,170
the tree line, the lights of the prison

2238
01:16:00,170 --> 01:16:02,569
camp come on, the sirens come on, the

2239
01:16:02,569 --> 01:16:05,130
dogs are barking, the guns are firing, the

2240
01:16:05,130 --> 01:16:07,369
hunt is on. Right? And they're running through

2241
01:16:07,369 --> 01:16:09,550
the forest, and this elderly man cannot

2242
01:16:10,010 --> 01:16:12,034
keep up with the group. And he keeps

2243
01:16:12,034 --> 01:16:14,195
falling back. So the group stops and they

2244
01:16:14,195 --> 01:16:15,954
go back and get him, and they lift

2245
01:16:15,954 --> 01:16:18,354
him, and they encourage him, and they motivate

2246
01:16:18,354 --> 01:16:20,114
him, and let's get going. And he they

2247
01:16:20,114 --> 01:16:21,335
get running, and

2248
01:16:21,875 --> 01:16:24,114
he falls back again. And he's does this

2249
01:16:24,114 --> 01:16:26,680
2 or 3 times. And finally, they get

2250
01:16:26,880 --> 01:16:28,640
come back to him again, and he says,

2251
01:16:28,640 --> 01:16:29,140
listen.

2252
01:16:29,520 --> 01:16:31,140
You have to leave me.

2253
01:16:31,440 --> 01:16:33,199
If you keep coming back to me, you

2254
01:16:33,199 --> 01:16:34,100
will be captured.

2255
01:16:34,560 --> 01:16:35,920
So they make the hard choice. I mean,

2256
01:16:35,920 --> 01:16:39,215
can you imagine leaving grandpa behind? Right? Because

2257
01:16:39,595 --> 01:16:41,435
he's holding the group up, and so the

2258
01:16:41,435 --> 01:16:43,375
group decides we're gonna leave him behind.

2259
01:16:43,835 --> 01:16:45,914
So this mother who has had this baby

2260
01:16:45,914 --> 01:16:48,074
that has this connection with this man, as

2261
01:16:48,074 --> 01:16:49,135
the group leaves,

2262
01:16:49,515 --> 01:16:51,835
the mother hands the baby to this elderly

2263
01:16:51,835 --> 01:16:53,860
man and says, will you just kiss my

2264
01:16:53,860 --> 01:16:56,260
baby goodbye one last time? And he takes

2265
01:16:56,260 --> 01:16:58,600
this baby in his arms, and he just

2266
01:16:58,659 --> 01:17:01,800
holds that sweet, innocent thing and kisses it.

2267
01:17:02,020 --> 01:17:03,699
And then the mother does something that I

2268
01:17:03,699 --> 01:17:04,760
couldn't even imagine.

2269
01:17:05,265 --> 01:17:05,765
She

2270
01:17:06,225 --> 01:17:08,625
ran, and she left that little baby in

2271
01:17:08,625 --> 01:17:10,704
this man's arms. And what do you think

2272
01:17:10,704 --> 01:17:11,284
he did?

2273
01:17:11,664 --> 01:17:13,844
He got up and ran like never before.

2274
01:17:14,385 --> 01:17:16,385
See, to me, that's the power of the

2275
01:17:16,385 --> 01:17:18,304
connection of Jesus Christ, and this is what

2276
01:17:18,304 --> 01:17:19,045
we're lacking

2277
01:17:19,470 --> 01:17:20,689
all the way through the

2278
01:17:21,069 --> 01:17:21,970
church. We're just

2279
01:17:22,350 --> 01:17:23,090
I think

2280
01:17:23,470 --> 01:17:25,550
the young adults aren't playing the game that

2281
01:17:25,550 --> 01:17:28,270
my generation sometimes plays. I don't have the

2282
01:17:28,270 --> 01:17:30,189
connection, but I have the culture and the

2283
01:17:30,189 --> 01:17:31,710
routine, so I'm not gonna go anywhere. I'm

2284
01:17:31,710 --> 01:17:33,390
just gonna kinda keep doing what I'm supposed

2285
01:17:33,390 --> 01:17:35,135
to be doing. They're not gonna play the

2286
01:17:35,135 --> 01:17:37,395
game. They're just gonna walk away. And so

2287
01:17:37,935 --> 01:17:40,354
how do we find ways to inspire

2288
01:17:41,055 --> 01:17:41,555
people

2289
01:17:42,175 --> 01:17:44,735
instead of trying to motivate people and truly

2290
01:17:44,735 --> 01:17:47,155
getting that baby or Jesus Christ

2291
01:17:47,534 --> 01:17:48,675
back in their lives?

2292
01:17:49,159 --> 01:17:50,439
I don't know how many of you there's

2293
01:17:50,439 --> 01:17:52,300
plenty of old people my age in here.

2294
01:17:52,600 --> 01:17:54,220
Have you seen them? The musical,

2295
01:17:55,000 --> 01:17:56,220
Fiddler on the Roof.

2296
01:17:56,600 --> 01:17:57,100
K.

2297
01:17:57,560 --> 01:17:59,720
This is such if you haven't seen this,

2298
01:17:59,720 --> 01:18:01,659
you should rent the movie and watch it.

2299
01:18:02,015 --> 01:18:04,015
It is a story of Jews being pushed

2300
01:18:04,015 --> 01:18:04,914
out of Russia,

2301
01:18:05,295 --> 01:18:07,954
pre World War 2, and it's this father's

2302
01:18:08,095 --> 01:18:08,595
challenge

2303
01:18:09,295 --> 01:18:10,814
of this is where we're at in the

2304
01:18:10,814 --> 01:18:12,994
church today. There is not a better

2305
01:18:13,614 --> 01:18:15,475
description of where we're at in the church.

2306
01:18:15,829 --> 01:18:18,710
This idea of the father struggling with the

2307
01:18:18,710 --> 01:18:20,409
relationships with his family

2308
01:18:21,109 --> 01:18:22,889
and the tradition and the culture

2309
01:18:23,189 --> 01:18:25,510
of his faith. And it's the fiddler on

2310
01:18:25,510 --> 01:18:27,189
the roof. What a crazy name for a

2311
01:18:27,189 --> 01:18:27,689
play.

2312
01:18:28,585 --> 01:18:30,744
Because you're we're trying to squeak out the

2313
01:18:30,744 --> 01:18:31,885
music of life,

2314
01:18:32,265 --> 01:18:34,265
and you have to have the balance on

2315
01:18:34,265 --> 01:18:34,925
the roof.

2316
01:18:35,305 --> 01:18:37,225
And if you lose the balance, you don't

2317
01:18:37,225 --> 01:18:39,704
play the music. And so look what we

2318
01:18:39,704 --> 01:18:41,710
can do sometimes. We get

2319
01:18:42,170 --> 01:18:43,789
too far to the relationship

2320
01:18:44,570 --> 01:18:45,070
and

2321
01:18:45,449 --> 01:18:48,409
our family and the relationship. And then all

2322
01:18:48,409 --> 01:18:50,750
of a sudden, we're abandoning the doctrine,

2323
01:18:51,289 --> 01:18:52,430
and we're fighting

2324
01:18:53,064 --> 01:18:55,224
against the doctrine on behalf of our children,

2325
01:18:55,224 --> 01:18:57,564
and we go too far to that side,

2326
01:18:57,784 --> 01:18:59,704
and we get out of balance. And how

2327
01:18:59,704 --> 01:19:01,625
many of you are seeing young adults leave

2328
01:19:01,625 --> 01:19:02,284
the church,

2329
01:19:02,744 --> 01:19:04,984
but they're taking their parents with them? Have

2330
01:19:04,984 --> 01:19:05,804
you seen that?

2331
01:19:06,460 --> 01:19:09,020
We're tipping too far, and the opposite is

2332
01:19:09,020 --> 01:19:12,059
a bigger problem. Right? We tip too far

2333
01:19:12,059 --> 01:19:15,260
the tradition and and the doctrine, and we're

2334
01:19:15,260 --> 01:19:17,819
so hard on that that we lose the

2335
01:19:17,819 --> 01:19:20,139
relationship with our children. So, yeah, I've got

2336
01:19:20,139 --> 01:19:22,645
some kids that are struggling. I hope that

2337
01:19:22,645 --> 01:19:24,265
they know that I love them,

2338
01:19:24,645 --> 01:19:27,524
but they also know where dad stands. And

2339
01:19:27,524 --> 01:19:30,564
I'm gonna defend Jesus Christ, and I'm gonna

2340
01:19:30,564 --> 01:19:31,545
follow the apostles.

2341
01:19:32,164 --> 01:19:34,905
And I gotta have the balance to squeak

2342
01:19:34,965 --> 01:19:36,985
out the music of life

2343
01:19:37,590 --> 01:19:38,729
between relationships

2344
01:19:39,670 --> 01:19:42,010
and good tradition, doctrine.

2345
01:19:42,469 --> 01:19:43,850
Thank you for this and

2346
01:19:44,229 --> 01:19:47,449
the perspective. And you're speaking at Education Week.

2347
01:19:47,909 --> 01:19:50,489
I am. We're tag teaming. I'm sort of

2348
01:19:50,664 --> 01:19:52,185
on different parts of the campus, but we're

2349
01:19:52,185 --> 01:19:54,344
both speaking education week. If you don't know

2350
01:19:54,344 --> 01:19:55,784
what education week is, like, I go there.

2351
01:19:55,784 --> 01:19:57,385
I'm like, how how come, like, the whole

2352
01:19:57,385 --> 01:19:59,404
church doesn't come to this? This is phenomenal.

2353
01:19:59,704 --> 01:20:00,024
And,

2354
01:20:00,664 --> 01:20:01,904
it'd be worth the time if you want

2355
01:20:02,024 --> 01:20:04,659
I want more. And I want hopefully, this

2356
01:20:04,659 --> 01:20:06,579
is, one of many conversations we get to

2357
01:20:06,579 --> 01:20:07,079
have.

2358
01:20:07,380 --> 01:20:10,260
You're home now. So Yeah. No more. We

2359
01:20:10,260 --> 01:20:11,960
have so many we have a long library

2360
01:20:12,099 --> 01:20:13,000
of Facebook,

2361
01:20:13,460 --> 01:20:16,340
voice voice memos going back and forth. Many

2362
01:20:16,340 --> 01:20:18,260
of you, just driving around in Peru in

2363
01:20:18,260 --> 01:20:20,175
your car. And, I won't He's been a

2364
01:20:20,175 --> 01:20:22,095
great mentor to me. I won't disclose the

2365
01:20:22,095 --> 01:20:24,354
words that he's he said during that. But,

2366
01:20:25,215 --> 01:20:27,854
so just a few remaining questions. What's next

2367
01:20:27,854 --> 01:20:28,515
for you?

2368
01:20:28,895 --> 01:20:31,695
Well, my my wife is full time student,

2369
01:20:31,695 --> 01:20:33,935
like you mentioned, at BYU. 20 credits this

2370
01:20:33,935 --> 01:20:34,435
semester.

2371
01:20:34,920 --> 01:20:35,420
She's,

2372
01:20:36,199 --> 01:20:39,659
she's doing a master's of, religion at BYU,

2373
01:20:40,600 --> 01:20:41,079
and,

2374
01:20:41,640 --> 01:20:43,880
I'm starting a new career as a partner

2375
01:20:43,880 --> 01:20:46,760
with Accepted and still doing a little dentistry

2376
01:20:46,760 --> 01:20:47,579
on the side.

2377
01:20:47,954 --> 01:20:50,514
So we are poor college students all over

2378
01:20:50,514 --> 01:20:51,494
again. Right, honey?

2379
01:20:51,795 --> 01:20:53,574
My biggest fear is she's gonna get pregnant.

2380
01:20:53,635 --> 01:20:54,747
That that

2381
01:20:55,474 --> 01:20:58,454
that's what I'm worried about. So That's great.

2382
01:20:59,554 --> 01:21:01,234
Awesome. And I wanna give a good plug.

2383
01:21:01,234 --> 01:21:04,079
Would the accepted guys stand up that are

2384
01:21:04,079 --> 01:21:06,020
here? Just stand up. Because if

2385
01:21:06,560 --> 01:21:09,039
if whenever anybody calls me, it's like, alright,

2386
01:21:09,039 --> 01:21:10,020
podcast boy.

2387
01:21:10,320 --> 01:21:11,840
I need a therapist. Where do you send

2388
01:21:11,840 --> 01:21:13,359
me? This is where I send them. Accepted

2389
01:21:13,359 --> 01:21:13,859
therapy.

2390
01:21:14,399 --> 01:21:16,399
So if you get a chance to snag

2391
01:21:16,399 --> 01:21:17,680
one of them, if you have a question,

2392
01:21:17,680 --> 01:21:18,420
if struggle,

2393
01:21:18,755 --> 01:21:20,215
now's your chance. So

2394
01:21:20,594 --> 01:21:22,034
We're gonna shake it up, aren't we? We're

2395
01:21:22,034 --> 01:21:24,434
gonna do some incredible things together. Robert's gonna

2396
01:21:24,434 --> 01:21:25,574
be part of their team,

2397
01:21:25,875 --> 01:21:27,474
and it's gonna be it's gonna be great.

2398
01:21:27,474 --> 01:21:27,974
So

2399
01:21:28,354 --> 01:21:30,994
and there there's a manuscript somewhere in your

2400
01:21:30,994 --> 01:21:32,755
in your hard drive that needs to be

2401
01:21:32,755 --> 01:21:34,470
a book. Right? You've been working on it.

2402
01:21:34,470 --> 01:21:36,070
It's I haven't done 3 years ago, and

2403
01:21:36,070 --> 01:21:38,010
I haven't edited it yet, but it's coming.

2404
01:21:38,470 --> 01:21:39,930
Last question I have for you.

2405
01:21:40,310 --> 01:21:42,869
Just reflecting on the last 3 years, the

2406
01:21:42,869 --> 01:21:45,850
struggle, the heartache, the excitement, the energy,

2407
01:21:46,685 --> 01:21:48,545
the call to serve energy.

2408
01:21:49,244 --> 01:21:51,485
As a leader, last 3 years, have you

2409
01:21:51,485 --> 01:21:53,985
become a better follower of Jesus Christ?

2410
01:21:54,364 --> 01:21:56,545
Yeah. This is why having the opportunity

2411
01:21:57,085 --> 01:21:59,005
to you know, I I hear people talk

2412
01:21:59,005 --> 01:22:00,445
about how why do we go to church?

2413
01:22:00,445 --> 01:22:01,960
And I don't need church and all this

2414
01:22:01,960 --> 01:22:04,780
kind of stuff. I had a sister missionary

2415
01:22:05,319 --> 01:22:05,819
that

2416
01:22:06,199 --> 01:22:08,280
I had several missionaries that had their parents

2417
01:22:08,280 --> 01:22:10,520
get divorced while they're on their mission. Can

2418
01:22:10,520 --> 01:22:12,760
you imagine how tough that would be? And

2419
01:22:12,760 --> 01:22:14,619
I remember this certain sister missionary.

2420
01:22:14,975 --> 01:22:17,074
It was shortly after I found out

2421
01:22:17,774 --> 01:22:19,935
about one of my children's decision to walk

2422
01:22:19,935 --> 01:22:21,555
away from the church. And,

2423
01:22:22,175 --> 01:22:23,935
and I was a little mad at God.

2424
01:22:23,935 --> 01:22:25,614
You know, here I am serving. Here I'm

2425
01:22:25,614 --> 01:22:27,375
doing what I'm supposed to be doing. Where

2426
01:22:27,375 --> 01:22:28,734
are the blessings? Why am I not, you

2427
01:22:28,734 --> 01:22:30,015
know, why is it not working out like

2428
01:22:30,015 --> 01:22:30,869
it's supposed to?

2429
01:22:31,989 --> 01:22:33,989
And she was having these same questions to

2430
01:22:33,989 --> 01:22:34,489
me.

2431
01:22:35,110 --> 01:22:37,289
And this is why we serve.

2432
01:22:37,909 --> 01:22:40,010
We are rescued in our service.

2433
01:22:40,390 --> 01:22:42,250
We're healed in our service.

2434
01:22:42,789 --> 01:22:43,289
And

2435
01:22:44,064 --> 01:22:45,904
I looked at that sweet sister, and she

2436
01:22:45,904 --> 01:22:48,145
was crying. And she says, I'm working so

2437
01:22:48,145 --> 01:22:50,304
hard, and I'm obedient, and I'm trying to

2438
01:22:50,304 --> 01:22:52,804
do what's right. Why my parents getting divorced?

2439
01:22:53,264 --> 01:22:54,404
Where are the blessings?

2440
01:22:55,264 --> 01:22:57,310
And I don't know if you've had this

2441
01:22:57,310 --> 01:22:58,590
experience, but this is why it's great to

2442
01:22:58,590 --> 01:23:00,190
be a missionary. This is why once again

2443
01:23:00,190 --> 01:23:00,930
we serve.

2444
01:23:01,470 --> 01:23:03,630
This is why I'm here. I'm here doing

2445
01:23:03,630 --> 01:23:04,369
this podcast.

2446
01:23:04,750 --> 01:23:06,190
I'm not didn't get much out of this

2447
01:23:06,190 --> 01:23:07,994
maybe, but I got a lot out of

2448
01:23:08,314 --> 01:23:09,755
it. I had to prepare for it. I

2449
01:23:09,755 --> 01:23:12,074
got some new ideas sitting here. The spirits

2450
01:23:12,074 --> 01:23:13,375
talked to me about some things.

2451
01:23:13,675 --> 01:23:16,255
This helped me be a better father.

2452
01:23:16,555 --> 01:23:18,475
And at the end of the day, that's

2453
01:23:18,475 --> 01:23:20,635
what it comes down to. And I told

2454
01:23:20,635 --> 01:23:23,454
this wonderful sister, missionary, I said, maybe

2455
01:23:23,890 --> 01:23:25,510
the miracle you're looking for,

2456
01:23:25,970 --> 01:23:27,989
maybe the blessing you're looking for

2457
01:23:28,289 --> 01:23:29,029
is you.

2458
01:23:29,569 --> 01:23:31,029
God's changing you

2459
01:23:31,489 --> 01:23:33,890
so you can go home and you can

2460
01:23:33,890 --> 01:23:36,289
be a blessing to your family. And so

2461
01:23:36,289 --> 01:23:37,029
to me,

2462
01:23:37,735 --> 01:23:39,994
that's the experience of the mission.

2463
01:23:40,375 --> 01:23:42,695
I love the miracles of Jesus Christ. And,

2464
01:23:43,095 --> 01:23:45,815
one of my favorites is the odd miracle

2465
01:23:45,815 --> 01:23:48,215
of Christ spitting in the dirt and making

2466
01:23:48,215 --> 01:23:50,395
the mud and wiping in this man's eyes.

2467
01:23:50,539 --> 01:23:53,260
He did that 1000 of years ago with

2468
01:23:53,260 --> 01:23:53,760
Enoch,

2469
01:23:54,140 --> 01:23:56,619
who wasn't physically blind, but he performed the

2470
01:23:56,619 --> 01:23:57,359
same miracle.

2471
01:23:57,899 --> 01:23:58,399
And

2472
01:23:58,699 --> 01:24:00,640
as I I thought about that miracle,

2473
01:24:01,340 --> 01:24:02,399
that's my miracle.

2474
01:24:02,985 --> 01:24:05,625
Because, you know, what is I think the

2475
01:24:05,625 --> 01:24:07,545
symbol of what Christ is trying to teach

2476
01:24:07,545 --> 01:24:08,364
in that miracle

2477
01:24:08,985 --> 01:24:12,284
is what's another word for mud or dirt

2478
01:24:12,345 --> 01:24:13,085
or earth?

2479
01:24:13,625 --> 01:24:15,164
How about the world?

2480
01:24:15,930 --> 01:24:18,810
That miracle is about washing the world out

2481
01:24:18,810 --> 01:24:19,710
of my eyes

2482
01:24:20,170 --> 01:24:22,489
so I can see who he is, and

2483
01:24:22,489 --> 01:24:24,650
I can see who I am. And this

2484
01:24:24,650 --> 01:24:26,409
is the this is why we have a

2485
01:24:26,409 --> 01:24:28,795
church. This is why we serve. This is

2486
01:24:28,795 --> 01:24:30,954
why we sacrifice. This is why we have

2487
01:24:30,954 --> 01:24:31,454
families.

2488
01:24:31,994 --> 01:24:33,774
It's because this is how you,

2489
01:24:34,234 --> 01:24:36,555
I believe, grow and truly learn how to

2490
01:24:36,555 --> 01:24:38,654
become like our heavenly father and our savior.

2491
01:24:45,909 --> 01:24:47,189
Hey. You made it to the end of

2492
01:24:47,189 --> 01:24:49,430
the episode. Wasn't that so good? You know,

2493
01:24:49,430 --> 01:24:51,270
I tend to pinch myself that this is

2494
01:24:51,270 --> 01:24:52,390
what I get to do. I get to

2495
01:24:52,390 --> 01:24:55,270
sit down with some remarkable people across the

2496
01:24:55,270 --> 01:24:56,409
world, experts,

2497
01:24:56,824 --> 01:25:00,185
everyday leaders, PhDs, therapists, whatever it be, and

2498
01:25:00,185 --> 01:25:02,824
have such an impactful conversation. I hope you'll

2499
01:25:02,824 --> 01:25:04,824
share it. Drop it into text message and

2500
01:25:04,824 --> 01:25:06,744
email and share it to someone who maybe

2501
01:25:06,744 --> 01:25:09,310
came to mind during this episode. And if

2502
01:25:09,310 --> 01:25:10,590
you go to the show notes and scroll

2503
01:25:10,590 --> 01:25:12,189
to the bottom, there's actually a list of

2504
01:25:12,189 --> 01:25:14,670
some of our most popular episodes. So don't

2505
01:25:14,670 --> 01:25:16,350
stop with this episode. I mean, you're not

2506
01:25:16,350 --> 01:25:18,110
done with the dishes or mowing the lawn

2507
01:25:18,110 --> 01:25:19,550
or working out, so you might as well

2508
01:25:19,550 --> 01:25:21,229
keep it going at the bottom of those

2509
01:25:21,229 --> 01:25:23,614
show notes and, make sure you you listen

2510
01:25:23,614 --> 01:25:25,215
to each one maybe a couple times on

2511
01:25:25,215 --> 01:25:26,114
a few of them.

2512
01:25:26,494 --> 01:25:29,055
Remember, learn more about disclosing betrayal from Jeff

2513
01:25:29,055 --> 01:25:31,234
Struer by visiting leading saints.org/14.

2514
01:25:42,159 --> 01:25:44,659
It came as a result of the position

2515
01:25:44,720 --> 01:25:47,699
of leadership, which was imposed upon us

2516
01:25:48,079 --> 01:25:50,180
by the God of heaven who brought

2517
01:25:50,554 --> 01:25:53,854
forth a restoration of the gospel of Jesus

2518
01:25:53,994 --> 01:25:54,494
Christ.

2519
01:25:55,194 --> 01:25:56,175
When the declaration

2520
01:25:56,554 --> 01:25:58,814
was made concerning the only

2521
01:25:59,514 --> 01:26:01,914
true and living Church upon the face of

2522
01:26:01,914 --> 01:26:02,654
the earth,

2523
01:26:03,149 --> 01:26:05,810
We were immediately put in a position of

2524
01:26:05,949 --> 01:26:06,449
loneliness,

2525
01:26:06,909 --> 01:26:08,449
the loneliness of leadership

2526
01:26:09,069 --> 01:26:12,050
from which we cannot shrink nor run away,

2527
01:26:12,829 --> 01:26:15,229
and to which we must face up with

2528
01:26:15,229 --> 01:26:16,850
boldness and courage

2529
01:26:17,310 --> 01:26:18,130
and ability.