1 00:00:00,599 --> 00:00:03,256 Humankind is produced in association with W 2 00:00:03,714 --> 00:00:06,990 Boston and supported by the humankind program fund. 3 00:00:07,804 --> 00:00:10,044 Additional funding for the series has been provided 4 00:00:10,044 --> 00:00:12,924 by the corporation for public broadcasting, the National 5 00:00:13,324 --> 00:00:13,964 Institutes of Health, 6 00:00:14,619 --> 00:00:17,488 Annie e casey foundation and the Park Foundation. 7 00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:22,030 This notion of, if I can just be... 8 00:00:22,764 --> 00:00:24,362 Still enough to listen to you. 9 00:00:25,082 --> 00:00:27,020 Just in that process of listening 10 00:00:28,118 --> 00:00:28,618 creates 11 00:00:29,797 --> 00:00:30,297 understanding 12 00:00:31,075 --> 00:00:31,929 and a connection 13 00:00:32,609 --> 00:00:33,008 between us. 14 00:00:34,526 --> 00:00:36,544 Promotes from me the possibility 15 00:00:36,923 --> 00:00:37,801 of peace making. 16 00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:41,252 The promote for me, the the possibility that 17 00:00:41,252 --> 00:00:43,430 we really can get along 18 00:00:43,809 --> 00:00:44,709 in society 19 00:00:45,088 --> 00:00:46,627 that we really can create 20 00:00:47,006 --> 00:00:47,939 institutions in places 21 00:00:48,459 --> 00:00:50,137 where peace building is sustainable. 22 00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:53,733 A simple way of communicating that can help 23 00:00:53,733 --> 00:00:57,250 us to heal conflict and foster greater compassion. 24 00:00:57,823 --> 00:01:01,011 You're listening to humankind. I'm David Freud. 25 00:01:13,909 --> 00:01:16,212 It's been said that we've learned how to 26 00:01:16,212 --> 00:01:18,832 speak, but not necessarily how to communicate. 27 00:01:19,547 --> 00:01:22,167 Rarely, we taught the art of deep listening. 28 00:01:22,659 --> 00:01:25,531 Or how to respond to someone without accusation 29 00:01:25,531 --> 00:01:28,960 or blame or the ability to articulate our 30 00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:31,991 own needs without putting others on the defensive. 31 00:01:32,803 --> 00:01:35,109 These are some skills taught in a system 32 00:01:35,109 --> 00:01:36,563 known as non nonviolent 33 00:01:37,256 --> 00:01:40,437 communication. Its aim is to promote more understanding 34 00:01:40,437 --> 00:01:42,345 in a world riddled with conflict. 35 00:01:43,157 --> 00:01:45,627 Finding ways to do that has long been 36 00:01:45,627 --> 00:01:48,257 a quest of Betty Bi an educator in 37 00:01:48,416 --> 00:01:48,735 Cambridge, 38 00:01:49,293 --> 00:01:49,691 Massachusetts. 39 00:01:50,264 --> 00:01:53,217 In an age where language is sometimes cheap 40 00:01:53,217 --> 00:01:53,935 and cra, 41 00:01:54,493 --> 00:01:57,366 her manner of speech is quiet and considered. 42 00:01:58,178 --> 00:01:58,496 I 43 00:01:59,052 --> 00:02:00,267 was in the peace corps, 44 00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:01,832 when I was very young, 45 00:02:03,023 --> 00:02:03,523 and 46 00:02:04,135 --> 00:02:05,882 I read a montessori school. 47 00:02:07,648 --> 00:02:08,684 For many years. 48 00:02:10,038 --> 00:02:10,538 I 49 00:02:11,073 --> 00:02:13,940 was very involved in the women's internationally Peace 50 00:02:13,940 --> 00:02:14,418 and freedom. 51 00:02:15,309 --> 00:02:16,184 For many years. 52 00:02:18,172 --> 00:02:21,752 In all of those environments, conflict was very 53 00:02:21,752 --> 00:02:22,205 present 54 00:02:23,039 --> 00:02:24,889 mean, conflict is a very normal 55 00:02:27,567 --> 00:02:29,791 condition in our lives. It and the conflict 56 00:02:29,791 --> 00:02:31,314 is not ever the problem. 57 00:02:31,870 --> 00:02:33,774 Of course, it's always the ways in which 58 00:02:33,774 --> 00:02:35,836 we try to solve it that we get 59 00:02:35,836 --> 00:02:36,709 into trouble. 60 00:02:37,661 --> 00:02:38,891 The the complex 61 00:02:39,265 --> 00:02:39,765 in 62 00:02:41,172 --> 00:02:43,318 teaching and running a school often had to 63 00:02:43,318 --> 00:02:44,056 do with 64 00:02:45,145 --> 00:02:46,202 people's assumptions, 65 00:02:47,549 --> 00:02:48,049 about 66 00:02:49,069 --> 00:02:50,129 what was actually 67 00:02:50,590 --> 00:02:51,729 happening or 68 00:02:52,109 --> 00:02:52,609 being 69 00:02:52,909 --> 00:02:54,750 required or requested of them. 70 00:02:55,709 --> 00:02:56,209 So 71 00:02:57,162 --> 00:02:57,560 Again, 72 00:02:59,392 --> 00:03:01,145 I've discovered it over and over again, 73 00:03:02,340 --> 00:03:04,570 the way to solving conflicts in a way 74 00:03:04,570 --> 00:03:06,419 that we all can live with it, is 75 00:03:06,419 --> 00:03:08,439 to listen deeply to people's needs 76 00:03:09,379 --> 00:03:11,159 that are at the center of the conflict 77 00:03:11,860 --> 00:03:13,379 and more often than not, 78 00:03:14,912 --> 00:03:16,263 the needs aren't in conflict. 79 00:03:17,138 --> 00:03:19,999 It's the strategies that we're trying to use 80 00:03:19,999 --> 00:03:20,714 to solve them. 81 00:03:21,668 --> 00:03:22,168 So 82 00:03:25,430 --> 00:03:25,930 My 83 00:03:26,307 --> 00:03:26,807 approach 84 00:03:27,823 --> 00:03:29,679 has always been to listen 85 00:03:30,136 --> 00:03:31,731 to listen and to listen. 86 00:03:32,859 --> 00:03:34,524 And in that listening process, 87 00:03:37,459 --> 00:03:38,515 looking for 88 00:03:39,125 --> 00:03:40,260 a place of 89 00:03:41,610 --> 00:03:42,009 agreement, 90 00:03:42,810 --> 00:03:43,769 a common ground. 91 00:03:45,129 --> 00:03:45,629 And 92 00:03:47,530 --> 00:03:48,569 more often than not, 93 00:03:49,381 --> 00:03:52,324 finding enough common ground to then move more 94 00:03:52,324 --> 00:03:55,108 deeply into where the conflict or the the 95 00:03:56,079 --> 00:03:59,112 The disconnect around the need is. Betty Bi 96 00:03:59,112 --> 00:04:00,650 has worked toward conflict 97 00:04:01,188 --> 00:04:04,222 resolution in venues ranging from a preschool on 98 00:04:04,381 --> 00:04:04,940 Cape Cod. 99 00:04:05,513 --> 00:04:08,933 To the United Nations department of disarm affairs. 100 00:04:09,648 --> 00:04:11,898 But whether in the playground or in the 101 00:04:12,193 --> 00:04:15,056 international arena or in personal relations at home. 102 00:04:15,866 --> 00:04:18,809 For Betty Burke the same principles of non 103 00:04:18,809 --> 00:04:19,309 nonviolent 104 00:04:19,923 --> 00:04:21,298 communication or Nbc 105 00:04:21,673 --> 00:04:22,071 apply. 106 00:04:22,802 --> 00:04:23,860 Listen respectfully, 107 00:04:24,874 --> 00:04:26,011 communicate authentically. 108 00:04:26,627 --> 00:04:29,495 She rarely attends a practice group with others. 109 00:04:29,828 --> 00:04:32,531 Trying to hone the skills of Nbc. 110 00:04:32,929 --> 00:04:33,985 In my own 111 00:04:34,995 --> 00:04:35,472 struggles, 112 00:04:36,426 --> 00:04:38,755 there is this sense of often 113 00:04:39,543 --> 00:04:40,600 this sense of 114 00:04:41,614 --> 00:04:42,751 wanting to fix 115 00:04:43,606 --> 00:04:44,504 somebody else's 116 00:04:45,677 --> 00:04:46,177 distress 117 00:04:47,430 --> 00:04:47,930 because 118 00:04:49,199 --> 00:04:51,297 there's some way in which I have 119 00:04:52,236 --> 00:04:54,654 taken on the notion that I'm responsible 120 00:04:55,433 --> 00:04:55,933 for 121 00:04:56,871 --> 00:04:57,671 their feelings. 122 00:04:58,963 --> 00:04:59,463 And 123 00:05:00,716 --> 00:05:03,845 having the opportunity through the Nbc practice group 124 00:05:04,780 --> 00:05:05,678 to actually 125 00:05:06,468 --> 00:05:08,700 understand my responsibility for what I've done. 126 00:05:10,135 --> 00:05:12,787 But also the fact that the other person 127 00:05:13,004 --> 00:05:15,254 makes choices about how they feel about what 128 00:05:15,414 --> 00:05:15,735 I've done, 129 00:05:16,694 --> 00:05:18,555 and that I don't get to 130 00:05:21,574 --> 00:05:22,074 control 131 00:05:22,854 --> 00:05:24,309 or be in charge of the choice is 132 00:05:24,309 --> 00:05:24,947 that they make. 133 00:05:26,063 --> 00:05:27,520 And that's both liberating 134 00:05:28,933 --> 00:05:29,752 in the end 135 00:05:30,688 --> 00:05:32,782 and goes against what 136 00:05:33,414 --> 00:05:35,349 we're brought up to to believe 137 00:05:36,205 --> 00:05:36,923 that in fact, 138 00:05:39,236 --> 00:05:41,310 I can behave in a particular way. I 139 00:05:41,310 --> 00:05:42,666 can... Whatever I do, 140 00:05:43,716 --> 00:05:47,056 you have the choice about your feelings around 141 00:05:47,056 --> 00:05:47,556 it 142 00:05:48,408 --> 00:05:50,498 that I can say something that's 143 00:05:50,873 --> 00:05:53,043 quite un and quite rude 144 00:05:53,754 --> 00:05:55,432 But how you receive it is up to 145 00:05:55,432 --> 00:05:57,930 you. You can choose to hear it as 146 00:05:57,989 --> 00:05:59,049 rude and 147 00:05:59,587 --> 00:05:59,987 cruel, 148 00:06:00,466 --> 00:06:01,846 or you can hear it as 149 00:06:02,637 --> 00:06:05,280 Betty not being very skill in trying to 150 00:06:05,415 --> 00:06:05,915 communicate 151 00:06:06,526 --> 00:06:07,423 and that it 152 00:06:07,955 --> 00:06:10,415 it truly is not about you. Not taking 153 00:06:10,415 --> 00:06:11,050 it personally. 154 00:06:11,624 --> 00:06:11,864 Yeah. 155 00:06:12,583 --> 00:06:13,802 How much of this 156 00:06:14,181 --> 00:06:17,298 practice of non nonviolent communication boils down to, 157 00:06:18,417 --> 00:06:20,115 not taking personally 158 00:06:21,069 --> 00:06:23,226 the things that other people say or do. 159 00:06:24,745 --> 00:06:25,304 All of it. 160 00:06:27,542 --> 00:06:28,921 All of it is about 161 00:06:29,873 --> 00:06:32,684 I mean not taking it personal is about 162 00:06:33,299 --> 00:06:34,994 really knowing that you aren't 163 00:06:35,370 --> 00:06:35,870 creating 164 00:06:36,963 --> 00:06:38,397 the other person's reality. 165 00:06:39,447 --> 00:06:39,923 It's hard. 166 00:06:41,433 --> 00:06:44,055 It is because it's not how we are 167 00:06:44,055 --> 00:06:44,452 raised. 168 00:06:45,088 --> 00:06:47,233 It's not the messages that we get as 169 00:06:47,233 --> 00:06:47,551 children. 170 00:06:48,205 --> 00:06:50,384 So if we're not creating the other person's 171 00:06:50,525 --> 00:06:50,845 reality, 172 00:06:51,884 --> 00:06:53,745 what is our role in 173 00:06:54,845 --> 00:06:55,978 communicating with the other person, 174 00:06:56,775 --> 00:06:58,130 especially in a case of conflict. 175 00:07:02,275 --> 00:07:03,312 Holding up our own. 176 00:07:04,519 --> 00:07:06,658 Like, being in touch with them authentically about 177 00:07:06,658 --> 00:07:07,846 our own reality. 178 00:07:09,035 --> 00:07:09,535 And 179 00:07:12,466 --> 00:07:15,260 being with them in a way that supports 180 00:07:15,260 --> 00:07:15,500 them, 181 00:07:16,458 --> 00:07:18,772 being in being with them in a relationship 182 00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:20,024 to them that supportive 183 00:07:20,463 --> 00:07:21,660 about their true nature, 184 00:07:23,655 --> 00:07:24,475 which is 185 00:07:25,251 --> 00:07:25,751 quite 186 00:07:26,528 --> 00:07:27,028 beautiful. 187 00:07:28,218 --> 00:07:29,966 And sacred and special. 188 00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:31,818 Even if 189 00:07:32,351 --> 00:07:33,543 covered over sometimes. 190 00:07:35,053 --> 00:07:36,643 Always, it's covered over. 191 00:07:38,812 --> 00:07:40,911 It is about unpacking it about 192 00:07:41,849 --> 00:07:42,828 restoring it sometimes, 193 00:07:45,618 --> 00:07:47,152 red it sometimes, 194 00:07:48,322 --> 00:07:49,037 but the... 195 00:07:50,866 --> 00:07:52,456 I believe and I I think it's at 196 00:07:52,456 --> 00:07:53,433 the basis of 197 00:07:53,744 --> 00:07:56,397 not nonviolent communication is that we are all 198 00:07:57,413 --> 00:07:57,732 good, 199 00:07:58,450 --> 00:07:58,950 loving, 200 00:08:00,284 --> 00:08:01,422 beautiful beings 201 00:08:02,438 --> 00:08:04,447 and that... At core. At core. 202 00:08:05,802 --> 00:08:06,542 And that 203 00:08:07,078 --> 00:08:09,790 Nbc is about helping us be in touch 204 00:08:09,790 --> 00:08:10,507 with that core. 205 00:08:11,066 --> 00:08:12,102 More and more and more. 206 00:08:13,792 --> 00:08:16,105 On a daily basis moment to moment. 207 00:08:17,700 --> 00:08:19,774 And of course, we will slip out of 208 00:08:19,774 --> 00:08:19,934 it, 209 00:08:20,891 --> 00:08:21,949 but we can always 210 00:08:22,406 --> 00:08:23,019 reestablish it 211 00:08:45,164 --> 00:08:48,434 The simply yet powerful skill sat known as 212 00:08:48,434 --> 00:08:49,253 non nonviolent 213 00:08:49,790 --> 00:08:52,745 communication has been championed by a tireless world 214 00:08:52,745 --> 00:08:54,595 traveler named Marshall Rosenberg. 215 00:08:55,286 --> 00:08:58,798 In 19 84, he founded the nonprofit center 216 00:08:58,798 --> 00:08:59,776 for non nonviolent 217 00:09:00,232 --> 00:09:02,485 communication based in La Sent California. 218 00:09:03,340 --> 00:09:06,105 Raised in a turbulent neighborhood of Detroit 219 00:09:06,541 --> 00:09:07,756 He has long been 220 00:09:08,129 --> 00:09:10,750 preoccupied with the question of what motivates some 221 00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:11,941 people toward violence, 222 00:09:12,417 --> 00:09:15,117 while others are moved to compassion instead. 223 00:09:15,769 --> 00:09:17,769 It spends much of the year training people 224 00:09:17,769 --> 00:09:18,909 in non nonviolent 225 00:09:19,450 --> 00:09:19,610 communication. 226 00:09:20,409 --> 00:09:22,169 Well, first, we try to get people to 227 00:09:22,169 --> 00:09:25,783 see the difference between intellectual understanding. Which is 228 00:09:25,783 --> 00:09:27,879 going up to our mind and classifying 229 00:09:28,257 --> 00:09:29,236 and trying to 230 00:09:29,614 --> 00:09:31,529 intellectually understand what somebody is saying. 231 00:09:32,168 --> 00:09:34,735 And empathy, which for us is to connect 232 00:09:34,735 --> 00:09:36,648 with the life that's coming through the other 233 00:09:36,648 --> 00:09:37,844 person at this moment. 234 00:09:39,836 --> 00:09:41,924 I was in a refugee camp for in 235 00:09:41,924 --> 00:09:44,657 the Middle East and when my interpreter 236 00:09:45,035 --> 00:09:47,348 announced that I was from the United States. 237 00:09:48,464 --> 00:09:50,937 A gentleman jumped to his feet and screamed 238 00:09:50,937 --> 00:09:52,470 at me, me do it. 239 00:09:53,670 --> 00:09:55,830 And here was my response to him. I 240 00:09:55,830 --> 00:09:55,990 said, 241 00:09:57,269 --> 00:09:57,509 sir, 242 00:09:59,519 --> 00:10:00,336 Are you 243 00:10:00,708 --> 00:10:01,208 irritated 244 00:10:01,660 --> 00:10:03,509 annoyed? I guess even furious 245 00:10:03,961 --> 00:10:06,920 with my government because your need for 246 00:10:07,707 --> 00:10:09,381 support is not being met by some of 247 00:10:09,381 --> 00:10:10,098 our policies. 248 00:10:11,055 --> 00:10:13,207 See We try to hear people's feelings and 249 00:10:13,207 --> 00:10:14,801 needs behind what they say. 250 00:10:15,611 --> 00:10:17,680 He was rather shocked, I think, to to 251 00:10:17,680 --> 00:10:19,986 hear that. I guess he was expecting a 252 00:10:19,986 --> 00:10:21,657 defensive or aggressive response. 253 00:10:22,229 --> 00:10:24,063 And after he stopped for a moment. And 254 00:10:24,063 --> 00:10:25,260 he said you're darn right. 255 00:10:26,217 --> 00:10:28,609 We don't have housing. We don't have sewage. 256 00:10:29,248 --> 00:10:30,843 Why are you sending your weapons? 257 00:10:32,934 --> 00:10:34,934 So again, I continued trying to hear the 258 00:10:34,934 --> 00:10:36,774 life that was coming through him, and I 259 00:10:36,774 --> 00:10:36,934 said, 260 00:10:37,735 --> 00:10:39,495 so, sir, am I hearing you correctly that 261 00:10:39,495 --> 00:10:41,748 it's very painful when you have such basic 262 00:10:41,748 --> 00:10:43,905 needs not getting met, and you see a 263 00:10:43,905 --> 00:10:46,062 lot of weapons being sent over here. 264 00:10:46,701 --> 00:10:47,900 You said you're darn right. 265 00:10:48,552 --> 00:10:50,141 You know what it's like to live under 266 00:10:50,141 --> 00:10:51,015 these conditions? 267 00:10:52,365 --> 00:10:54,669 I said sir, so you'd like some understanding 268 00:10:54,669 --> 00:10:54,828 of. 269 00:10:55,559 --> 00:10:57,317 Just how painful it can be to live 270 00:10:57,317 --> 00:10:58,356 under these conditions. 271 00:10:59,235 --> 00:11:01,652 Now in a couple more sentences, he felt 272 00:11:01,792 --> 00:11:03,390 understood and he could start to hear me. 273 00:11:04,123 --> 00:11:06,117 And about 40 minutes after that when the 274 00:11:06,117 --> 00:11:08,270 meeting was over, he invited me to Rama 275 00:11:08,270 --> 00:11:09,386 down dinner at his house. 276 00:11:10,582 --> 00:11:12,917 Was your first goal to 277 00:11:13,627 --> 00:11:17,367 diffuse the anger and intensity by asking those 278 00:11:17,367 --> 00:11:17,867 questions 279 00:11:18,242 --> 00:11:19,060 trying to 280 00:11:19,436 --> 00:11:21,284 understand him and hear him out. Oh, my 281 00:11:21,284 --> 00:11:22,962 first goal was to see the beauty in 282 00:11:22,962 --> 00:11:23,841 this human being. 283 00:11:25,040 --> 00:11:26,878 I know that whatever is coming through a 284 00:11:26,878 --> 00:11:29,035 human being is a very precious energy. 285 00:11:30,168 --> 00:11:32,475 A divine energy, and I wanna commit with 286 00:11:32,475 --> 00:11:32,634 that. 287 00:11:33,430 --> 00:11:35,681 If even if the person is 288 00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:39,251 being nasty and he's only nasty if I'm 289 00:11:39,251 --> 00:11:42,033 diagnosing him? I don't diagnose him. I try 290 00:11:42,033 --> 00:11:43,861 to hear what is his pain right now 291 00:11:43,861 --> 00:11:45,609 that leads him to call me this name? 292 00:11:46,499 --> 00:11:48,415 What needs of his or not being met. 293 00:11:48,894 --> 00:11:51,230 So you are not perceiving him 294 00:11:51,927 --> 00:11:54,023 as threatening or as 295 00:11:54,401 --> 00:11:54,641 unpleasant? 296 00:11:55,453 --> 00:11:57,362 Let me say that the first... When he 297 00:11:57,362 --> 00:11:58,794 jumped to his feet in the tone of 298 00:11:58,794 --> 00:12:01,260 his voice, my first reaction, I was scared. 299 00:12:02,548 --> 00:12:04,218 I was really scared so I took a 300 00:12:04,218 --> 00:12:06,548 deep breath before I said anything and just 301 00:12:07,559 --> 00:12:10,196 saw my fear, but I didn't see him 302 00:12:10,196 --> 00:12:12,099 as the problem. I just saw that I 303 00:12:12,099 --> 00:12:12,837 was scared 304 00:12:13,606 --> 00:12:16,302 and giving myself just that much understanding. I 305 00:12:16,302 --> 00:12:18,625 could then shift my attention to what he 306 00:12:18,625 --> 00:12:20,779 might be feeling and needing when he said 307 00:12:20,779 --> 00:12:21,257 that. Now, 308 00:12:22,214 --> 00:12:24,129 I had some clues to go on because 309 00:12:24,129 --> 00:12:26,442 as we were walking into the refugee camp 310 00:12:26,442 --> 00:12:28,450 that day, we had to kick out of 311 00:12:28,450 --> 00:12:29,009 the path, 312 00:12:30,125 --> 00:12:32,198 empty tear gas grenades. There were hundreds of 313 00:12:32,198 --> 00:12:34,192 them all over the ground. There had been 314 00:12:34,192 --> 00:12:36,639 a riot in this refugee camp the night 315 00:12:36,759 --> 00:12:39,060 4 and hundreds of tear gas grenades were 316 00:12:39,060 --> 00:12:41,124 shipped in there. And on the side of 317 00:12:41,124 --> 00:12:43,822 these empty grenades was written made in Usa. 318 00:12:44,554 --> 00:12:46,552 So if people are seeing that as they 319 00:12:46,552 --> 00:12:48,091 walk the paths of their 320 00:12:48,789 --> 00:12:49,269 refugee camp, 321 00:12:50,867 --> 00:12:51,767 they have some 322 00:12:52,146 --> 00:12:53,265 associations to people. 323 00:12:53,839 --> 00:12:54,658 Non nonviolent 324 00:12:55,196 --> 00:12:58,229 communication recognizes that there's often a story behind 325 00:12:58,229 --> 00:12:58,788 the story. 326 00:12:59,347 --> 00:13:01,822 The ideas people express and the tone of 327 00:13:01,822 --> 00:13:02,961 voice they use 328 00:13:03,274 --> 00:13:06,327 Don't always convey fully their are true underlying 329 00:13:06,386 --> 00:13:06,705 concerns. 330 00:13:07,343 --> 00:13:09,657 A good listener will notice not only what's 331 00:13:09,657 --> 00:13:13,039 being said, but also what's been left said 332 00:13:13,096 --> 00:13:15,164 and we'll try to get clarification on the 333 00:13:15,164 --> 00:13:16,300 source of conflict. 334 00:13:16,994 --> 00:13:19,221 For Betty Bi, who is African American, 335 00:13:19,954 --> 00:13:21,573 peer beneath the surface 336 00:13:21,952 --> 00:13:24,690 helped her to get past appearances while 337 00:13:25,069 --> 00:13:27,247 participating in a circle of peace activists. 338 00:13:27,786 --> 00:13:28,606 I joined 339 00:13:29,399 --> 00:13:32,772 the circle after the invitation quite joyful 340 00:13:33,708 --> 00:13:34,187 and 341 00:13:35,782 --> 00:13:36,761 fell quite 342 00:13:37,554 --> 00:13:39,875 privileged and honored to be invited. 343 00:13:41,075 --> 00:13:42,754 Out of my own sense of my own 344 00:13:42,754 --> 00:13:43,254 work 345 00:13:43,634 --> 00:13:44,615 and my own 346 00:13:45,484 --> 00:13:45,984 accomplishment 347 00:13:47,948 --> 00:13:50,991 around non violence and peace education and 348 00:13:51,365 --> 00:13:52,875 and those values that I hold in the 349 00:13:52,875 --> 00:13:54,662 world in the place that I have 350 00:13:55,036 --> 00:13:55,536 actually 351 00:13:55,910 --> 00:13:57,181 had an opportunity to work. 352 00:13:59,247 --> 00:14:01,019 And as the meeting 353 00:14:01,329 --> 00:14:02,147 of the circle 354 00:14:02,763 --> 00:14:04,037 progressed over the year. 355 00:14:05,631 --> 00:14:06,131 I 356 00:14:06,826 --> 00:14:07,326 through 357 00:14:08,340 --> 00:14:09,158 conversations and 358 00:14:09,774 --> 00:14:10,274 observations 359 00:14:10,983 --> 00:14:11,483 realized 360 00:14:11,854 --> 00:14:12,354 that 361 00:14:14,153 --> 00:14:15,842 I had actually been invited 362 00:14:16,372 --> 00:14:18,140 because I filled a particular 363 00:14:19,321 --> 00:14:20,273 diversity slot. 364 00:14:21,702 --> 00:14:23,154 And I was 365 00:14:23,765 --> 00:14:24,265 quite 366 00:14:26,146 --> 00:14:26,646 hurt 367 00:14:27,754 --> 00:14:28,574 and felt 368 00:14:30,554 --> 00:14:31,054 angry 369 00:14:31,995 --> 00:14:32,634 about that. 370 00:14:34,315 --> 00:14:34,769 But 371 00:14:35,684 --> 00:14:37,912 actually, I got some empathy around it. 372 00:14:38,867 --> 00:14:40,242 I was able to 373 00:14:42,208 --> 00:14:43,584 separate my own 374 00:14:44,451 --> 00:14:44,951 personal 375 00:14:46,359 --> 00:14:46,859 internalized 376 00:14:48,347 --> 00:14:49,960 feelings of not 377 00:14:50,653 --> 00:14:53,378 being enough just as who I was, and 378 00:14:53,378 --> 00:14:55,135 for the work I done to be invited, 379 00:14:56,254 --> 00:14:57,792 but that it was 380 00:14:59,703 --> 00:15:00,601 a racial 381 00:15:01,772 --> 00:15:03,442 slot that need to be filled and I 382 00:15:03,442 --> 00:15:05,351 met that race and I was invited. 383 00:15:06,226 --> 00:15:07,537 I was able to 384 00:15:07,912 --> 00:15:10,298 do some empathy for the person who was 385 00:15:10,298 --> 00:15:11,332 organizing this circle, 386 00:15:12,048 --> 00:15:12,548 and 387 00:15:14,369 --> 00:15:16,696 understanding that the need to 388 00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:20,668 diversify the circles to invite 389 00:15:22,574 --> 00:15:23,074 people 390 00:15:24,170 --> 00:15:26,665 into it who would meet her needs for 391 00:15:26,803 --> 00:15:27,920 inclusion and diversity. 392 00:15:28,573 --> 00:15:30,485 Really had nothing to do with my worth 393 00:15:30,485 --> 00:15:31,281 and my value. 394 00:15:32,237 --> 00:15:34,729 It was really about her need to 395 00:15:35,519 --> 00:15:37,433 feel her circle in a particular way. 396 00:15:38,629 --> 00:15:40,326 And I was able to 397 00:15:40,863 --> 00:15:43,255 reconnect with my own self around my own 398 00:15:43,255 --> 00:15:44,553 worth and my own value. 399 00:15:45,661 --> 00:15:46,400 And not 400 00:15:47,091 --> 00:15:47,591 around 401 00:15:48,600 --> 00:15:49,100 my 402 00:15:49,871 --> 00:15:51,006 feelings of 403 00:15:52,968 --> 00:15:56,269 diminish or feelings of not enough ness 404 00:15:57,529 --> 00:15:59,149 that got stimulated 405 00:15:59,769 --> 00:16:01,949 when I real when I understood 406 00:16:02,490 --> 00:16:05,139 the circumstances that had included me in the 407 00:16:05,139 --> 00:16:05,537 circle, 408 00:16:06,094 --> 00:16:07,846 that that was not about me at all. 409 00:16:15,176 --> 00:16:17,080 In the heat of a moment of conflict, 410 00:16:17,794 --> 00:16:20,333 especially if we're feeling slight or even attacked. 411 00:16:20,983 --> 00:16:23,049 It can be extremely hard to see the 412 00:16:23,049 --> 00:16:25,751 other people as they really are, rather than 413 00:16:25,751 --> 00:16:28,135 through this subjective lens that we may have 414 00:16:28,135 --> 00:16:29,168 created about them. 415 00:16:30,059 --> 00:16:30,878 Non nonviolent 416 00:16:31,494 --> 00:16:34,444 communication offers some tools for breaking through those 417 00:16:34,444 --> 00:16:34,944 pre 418 00:16:35,879 --> 00:16:38,031 toward a more authentic way of interacting. 419 00:16:38,843 --> 00:16:39,637 Marshal Rosenberg. 420 00:16:40,273 --> 00:16:42,180 Well, the first thing you is that all 421 00:16:42,180 --> 00:16:45,064 this language that we first hear is criticism 422 00:16:45,518 --> 00:16:46,790 attack in insult. 423 00:16:47,837 --> 00:16:50,775 Is a tragic expression of what the speaker 424 00:16:50,775 --> 00:16:52,364 is feeling and needing. 425 00:16:52,999 --> 00:16:54,587 And we show people that if you can 426 00:16:54,587 --> 00:16:55,302 see the truth, 427 00:16:56,113 --> 00:16:58,027 The truth, you see. Now I was working 428 00:16:58,027 --> 00:16:59,144 with Israeli police. 429 00:16:59,941 --> 00:17:01,776 And when I didn't make this clear at 430 00:17:01,776 --> 00:17:03,690 first. 1 of the police... Let me see 431 00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:05,126 if I'm understanding you, Marshal, 432 00:17:05,699 --> 00:17:08,411 you're saying if somebody spits on me, I'm 433 00:17:08,411 --> 00:17:10,086 supposed to tell myself it's raining up. 434 00:17:11,522 --> 00:17:13,436 I said, thank you for that question. I 435 00:17:13,436 --> 00:17:14,792 think it'll help me be clear. 436 00:17:15,683 --> 00:17:18,222 No. Telling yourself it's raining out is looking 437 00:17:18,222 --> 00:17:20,601 at the world through rose colored glasses that 438 00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:23,457 I'm saying is it requires seeing the truth. 439 00:17:23,949 --> 00:17:26,817 See what that person is feeling and needing 440 00:17:26,817 --> 00:17:29,048 at the time you get this message. Whatever 441 00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:31,199 the message is even if it is spitting. 442 00:17:31,756 --> 00:17:33,212 So you're seeing a difference 443 00:17:33,924 --> 00:17:36,345 between when somebody lashes out 444 00:17:36,884 --> 00:17:38,585 through insult or Vi, 445 00:17:39,765 --> 00:17:40,265 and 446 00:17:40,724 --> 00:17:44,008 who the person is that doing the lashing 447 00:17:44,008 --> 00:17:46,547 out. But I'm gonna be even more concrete 448 00:17:46,547 --> 00:17:48,529 than the the abstract, who the person is. 449 00:17:48,847 --> 00:17:50,775 I wanna hear something very concrete 450 00:17:51,083 --> 00:17:53,539 What are they feeling at this moment? What 451 00:17:53,539 --> 00:17:53,777 emotions? 452 00:17:54,410 --> 00:17:57,287 And what needs of theirs are creating the 453 00:17:57,342 --> 00:17:57,579 emotions? 454 00:17:58,625 --> 00:18:01,244 See all human beings have the same needs. 455 00:18:02,196 --> 00:18:04,101 So when I see the need of this 456 00:18:04,101 --> 00:18:06,585 person that's being expressed through this 457 00:18:07,214 --> 00:18:07,694 language. 458 00:18:08,892 --> 00:18:10,970 I see another human being like me like 459 00:18:10,970 --> 00:18:13,048 you. I don't see an enemy. 460 00:18:13,607 --> 00:18:15,925 I don't see him lashing out or insulting 461 00:18:15,925 --> 00:18:17,930 me. I see him as trying in the 462 00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:20,022 best way he knows how to tell me 463 00:18:20,238 --> 00:18:22,546 that something I've done is a stimulus for 464 00:18:22,546 --> 00:18:23,262 pain for him. 465 00:18:23,913 --> 00:18:25,658 And it didn't meet some needs of his, 466 00:18:26,293 --> 00:18:28,039 or maybe it isn't something I did. It's 467 00:18:28,039 --> 00:18:29,943 the fact that I'm from the United States. 468 00:18:30,102 --> 00:18:30,340 Well, 469 00:18:31,228 --> 00:18:33,953 that's not something about the country I'm associated 470 00:18:34,089 --> 00:18:37,188 with is doing something that's stimulating great pain 471 00:18:37,188 --> 00:18:39,334 for him. It's not meeting his needs. 472 00:18:40,384 --> 00:18:42,460 So as we put it this way sometimes 473 00:18:42,460 --> 00:18:43,098 in our training. 474 00:18:43,737 --> 00:18:47,330 Never hear what somebody thinks about you. You'll 475 00:18:47,330 --> 00:18:49,645 live longer and enjoy people more. 476 00:18:50,778 --> 00:18:52,456 Instead of hearing what they think about you, 477 00:18:52,616 --> 00:18:54,613 even when they say, I think you're this 478 00:18:54,613 --> 00:18:55,172 or that. 479 00:18:55,891 --> 00:18:58,451 Hear the truth. Here at that moment, what 480 00:18:58,451 --> 00:19:00,593 that person is feeling and needy. 481 00:19:01,228 --> 00:19:04,559 What they're telling you about themselves. Hear what 482 00:19:04,559 --> 00:19:05,789 they are feeling 483 00:19:06,089 --> 00:19:08,329 and needing, and that does tell you about 484 00:19:08,329 --> 00:19:10,409 themselves. Yes. It says that at that moment 485 00:19:10,409 --> 00:19:12,169 what they're feeling and needing. 486 00:19:12,890 --> 00:19:14,829 Now we have to guess at this because 487 00:19:15,064 --> 00:19:17,382 they're not using a language of feelings and 488 00:19:17,382 --> 00:19:17,701 needs. 489 00:19:18,740 --> 00:19:21,536 However, even if I guess wrong, I am 490 00:19:21,536 --> 00:19:24,107 still seeing a human being. I'm not hearing 491 00:19:24,107 --> 00:19:24,927 any criticism. 492 00:19:25,385 --> 00:19:26,364 I'm not diagnosing 493 00:19:26,742 --> 00:19:29,297 them. I'm connecting with their human. 494 00:19:45,252 --> 00:19:47,264 The philosophy of non nonviolent 495 00:19:47,973 --> 00:19:51,476 occasion requires deeply respecting the humanity of others. 496 00:19:52,033 --> 00:19:55,638 But that doesn't dictate yielding to unreasonable demands 497 00:19:56,108 --> 00:19:58,730 or ac whenever someone tries to get their 498 00:19:58,730 --> 00:20:00,557 way by use of bully tactics. 499 00:20:01,271 --> 00:20:04,313 Treating the other person with dignity while treating 500 00:20:04,449 --> 00:20:05,402 oneself with dignity, 501 00:20:05,973 --> 00:20:07,724 can mean walking a fine line. 502 00:20:08,361 --> 00:20:09,657 The line is 503 00:20:10,510 --> 00:20:11,010 understanding 504 00:20:12,420 --> 00:20:15,205 my responsibility versus your responsibility. 505 00:20:16,334 --> 00:20:18,106 And my taking responsibility 506 00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:20,230 for what I'm responsible for. 507 00:20:20,946 --> 00:20:23,490 And how do you see your responsibility in 508 00:20:23,490 --> 00:20:26,530 a mode of communication and based on non 509 00:20:26,530 --> 00:20:26,929 violence? 510 00:20:28,922 --> 00:20:31,154 Consciousness and awareness around speech. 511 00:20:32,908 --> 00:20:33,839 The way I speak 512 00:20:35,702 --> 00:20:36,575 the way I listen, 513 00:20:39,349 --> 00:20:40,380 my intentions, 514 00:20:44,211 --> 00:20:44,711 my 515 00:20:47,314 --> 00:20:49,326 commitment to staying self connected 516 00:20:49,941 --> 00:20:52,502 in the process of being connected to the 517 00:20:52,502 --> 00:20:53,139 other person. 518 00:20:54,333 --> 00:20:56,243 So to remain true to yourself. 519 00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:57,698 To remain 520 00:20:59,762 --> 00:21:02,154 present with myself. That's the kind of truth, 521 00:21:02,793 --> 00:21:05,366 but not abandoning my own 522 00:21:05,824 --> 00:21:08,296 emotions, my own feelings and my own needs, 523 00:21:08,949 --> 00:21:10,625 in the moment of listening to the other 524 00:21:10,625 --> 00:21:11,024 persons. 525 00:21:11,982 --> 00:21:14,615 So sometimes it's about taking time out. It's 526 00:21:14,615 --> 00:21:17,583 about saying, you know, I'm not I'm not 527 00:21:17,583 --> 00:21:19,199 able to give you the kind of 528 00:21:19,735 --> 00:21:21,490 listening and the kind of attention that you 529 00:21:21,490 --> 00:21:23,323 need right now because I'm needing so much. 530 00:21:23,802 --> 00:21:25,657 Could we make some time 531 00:21:26,447 --> 00:21:28,913 just to be quiet together, just to give 532 00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:30,049 me a chance to 533 00:21:31,061 --> 00:21:33,463 reconnect with myself so that I can more 534 00:21:33,463 --> 00:21:34,261 connected to you. 535 00:21:35,058 --> 00:21:37,132 So you said a moment ago that your 536 00:21:37,132 --> 00:21:37,632 responsibility 537 00:21:38,009 --> 00:21:40,503 included being responsible for 538 00:21:41,040 --> 00:21:41,599 your speech? 539 00:21:42,317 --> 00:21:42,556 Yes. 540 00:21:43,527 --> 00:21:45,599 It seems we live in a culture where 541 00:21:45,599 --> 00:21:46,816 there's a lot of reckless 542 00:21:47,272 --> 00:21:47,511 speech. 543 00:21:49,184 --> 00:21:50,974 What does it mean who 544 00:21:51,589 --> 00:21:52,089 consciously 545 00:21:52,465 --> 00:21:52,965 take 546 00:21:53,819 --> 00:21:55,730 responsibility for what we say. 547 00:21:56,925 --> 00:21:59,018 It means staying in 548 00:22:00,046 --> 00:22:01,342 a place of 549 00:22:01,717 --> 00:22:03,172 wake and consciousness 550 00:22:04,344 --> 00:22:05,219 about myself, 551 00:22:06,731 --> 00:22:08,881 staying connected to myself and my values. 552 00:22:10,324 --> 00:22:10,824 And 553 00:22:13,656 --> 00:22:15,108 which is which is 554 00:22:16,527 --> 00:22:19,962 being aware that really my intention is to 555 00:22:20,335 --> 00:22:21,946 be in the service of 556 00:22:22,794 --> 00:22:23,588 staying connected. 557 00:22:25,592 --> 00:22:27,348 And if that's what I want, 558 00:22:28,705 --> 00:22:29,205 then 559 00:22:31,100 --> 00:22:32,297 I have to do certain things. 560 00:22:33,827 --> 00:22:35,180 Like monitor my speech, 561 00:22:36,930 --> 00:22:38,623 monitor my responses, 562 00:22:40,271 --> 00:22:41,703 be aware of my feelings. 563 00:22:43,385 --> 00:22:43,885 Maintain 564 00:22:44,733 --> 00:22:48,088 an environment that nurture and contributes 565 00:22:48,539 --> 00:22:49,570 to those values. 566 00:22:50,936 --> 00:22:53,824 Which for me means not watching television, 567 00:22:55,314 --> 00:22:56,429 turning off the news. 568 00:22:58,592 --> 00:23:01,058 Monitoring the newspapers or the the media that 569 00:23:01,058 --> 00:23:02,012 comes into my house. 570 00:23:03,125 --> 00:23:03,864 So really 571 00:23:04,557 --> 00:23:08,726 being very discriminating in what you allow into 572 00:23:09,099 --> 00:23:11,638 your thinking? Yes. The books that I choose 573 00:23:11,638 --> 00:23:13,804 to read, the movies I choose to see 574 00:23:14,114 --> 00:23:14,933 So choice 575 00:23:15,870 --> 00:23:17,727 is at the heart of 576 00:23:18,664 --> 00:23:19,563 some of that 577 00:23:20,819 --> 00:23:22,517 consideration in how I 578 00:23:24,508 --> 00:23:27,644 live in order to maintain that quality of 579 00:23:28,023 --> 00:23:28,523 speech 580 00:23:28,982 --> 00:23:29,622 or action. 581 00:23:30,341 --> 00:23:31,060 It's so easy. 582 00:23:31,554 --> 00:23:32,054 Nevertheless, 583 00:23:32,430 --> 00:23:34,503 for us to blur out things, we don't 584 00:23:34,503 --> 00:23:35,003 really 585 00:23:36,177 --> 00:23:39,365 intend. Mh. To say. Yes. Of course. 586 00:23:40,496 --> 00:23:41,771 I make lots of mistakes. 587 00:23:43,842 --> 00:23:45,856 The level of skill that I 588 00:23:46,232 --> 00:23:47,211 want to live 589 00:23:47,747 --> 00:23:49,021 is often not there. 590 00:23:50,308 --> 00:23:51,125 Its practice. 591 00:23:51,895 --> 00:23:53,665 It's about being in the 592 00:23:54,117 --> 00:23:56,340 commitment and intention of practice. 593 00:23:57,387 --> 00:24:00,194 And you know, I I do believe that 594 00:24:01,285 --> 00:24:04,045 when the intention is there, when the intention 595 00:24:04,243 --> 00:24:07,656 is good even when we lack our skill 596 00:24:07,656 --> 00:24:08,767 or we make a mistake. 597 00:24:09,481 --> 00:24:10,934 There is a way of 598 00:24:11,465 --> 00:24:13,097 recur reads much more quickly 599 00:24:13,555 --> 00:24:15,471 than when the intention is not good. 600 00:24:16,987 --> 00:24:19,143 You know, I might hurt your... I might 601 00:24:19,143 --> 00:24:20,441 do something that 602 00:24:21,632 --> 00:24:24,905 is hurtful that results in hurting or someone 603 00:24:24,905 --> 00:24:25,804 feeling hurt 604 00:24:27,859 --> 00:24:30,069 But if my intention was not to 605 00:24:30,668 --> 00:24:32,104 my intention was not to harm. 606 00:24:32,742 --> 00:24:34,817 The way in which we can reconnect and 607 00:24:34,817 --> 00:24:37,291 recover it is much is much quicker. 608 00:24:38,341 --> 00:24:39,874 And for you, what is 609 00:24:40,248 --> 00:24:44,142 what is the intention that underlies your interest 610 00:24:44,142 --> 00:24:46,605 in communicating with people in a nonviolent way. 611 00:24:48,289 --> 00:24:48,925 Promoting peace, 612 00:24:49,560 --> 00:24:50,060 promoting 613 00:24:50,832 --> 00:24:51,309 promoting, 614 00:24:52,421 --> 00:24:53,931 a way of being in the world. 615 00:24:54,662 --> 00:24:56,650 That I would like everybody to be able 616 00:24:56,650 --> 00:24:57,446 to be in the world, 617 00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:00,093 living in a way that 618 00:25:00,627 --> 00:25:03,134 really come out of doing into others 619 00:25:03,749 --> 00:25:05,343 as I would have them do unto to 620 00:25:05,343 --> 00:25:05,582 me. 621 00:25:06,379 --> 00:25:08,744 And my doing into others is really 622 00:25:10,384 --> 00:25:12,305 coming out of a place of love and 623 00:25:12,305 --> 00:25:13,444 acceptance and 624 00:25:15,025 --> 00:25:15,525 appreciation 625 00:25:15,904 --> 00:25:16,404 and 626 00:25:17,265 --> 00:25:19,219 recognizing the sacred 627 00:25:20,071 --> 00:25:21,265 in all beings. 628 00:25:23,016 --> 00:25:23,516 So 629 00:25:25,801 --> 00:25:27,814 that's my intention. That's what 630 00:25:28,681 --> 00:25:29,818 that's what motivates 631 00:25:30,352 --> 00:25:30,852 my 632 00:25:32,023 --> 00:25:32,523 desire 633 00:25:33,296 --> 00:25:35,046 of, a way of being in the world. 634 00:25:35,619 --> 00:25:37,932 And I don't often don't come up to 635 00:25:37,932 --> 00:25:39,607 it, but it's still what I'm holding. 636 00:25:40,803 --> 00:25:41,303 And 637 00:25:41,760 --> 00:25:44,573 is there anything in your personal life personal 638 00:25:44,632 --> 00:25:45,325 story that 639 00:25:45,924 --> 00:25:47,464 drives you to want to 640 00:25:48,005 --> 00:25:49,284 make the world more peaceful. 641 00:25:50,244 --> 00:25:52,585 David, I grew up in a family. 642 00:25:53,696 --> 00:25:54,196 With 643 00:25:54,971 --> 00:25:56,485 a grandmother and a father, 644 00:25:57,680 --> 00:25:58,078 who, 645 00:25:59,035 --> 00:26:00,252 modeled for me 646 00:26:01,603 --> 00:26:03,041 a way of being in the world that 647 00:26:03,201 --> 00:26:03,701 I 648 00:26:04,080 --> 00:26:04,580 integrated 649 00:26:05,598 --> 00:26:08,496 in a non stage at and 650 00:26:09,368 --> 00:26:11,382 it's deeply embedded in me 651 00:26:11,837 --> 00:26:13,612 this this notion that 652 00:26:14,307 --> 00:26:15,741 the way to be in the world is 653 00:26:15,741 --> 00:26:17,175 to be in in the world in a 654 00:26:17,175 --> 00:26:18,232 loving kind 655 00:26:20,614 --> 00:26:21,114 generous 656 00:26:22,127 --> 00:26:22,366 spacious, 657 00:26:23,640 --> 00:26:24,038 abundant, 658 00:26:25,790 --> 00:26:26,267 message, 659 00:26:27,794 --> 00:26:28,272 that 660 00:26:29,067 --> 00:26:30,738 there is enough for everyone, 661 00:26:31,931 --> 00:26:32,488 and that, 662 00:26:33,283 --> 00:26:35,113 part of our being on this planet is 663 00:26:35,113 --> 00:26:36,344 to be in this service 664 00:26:37,037 --> 00:26:37,775 of others 665 00:26:38,865 --> 00:26:39,922 and that 666 00:26:40,615 --> 00:26:42,682 others are here to be in the service 667 00:26:42,682 --> 00:26:44,829 of us as well that is... It's about 668 00:26:44,829 --> 00:26:45,329 mutual. 669 00:26:46,594 --> 00:26:48,207 And we have some responsibility 670 00:26:48,582 --> 00:26:49,082 to 671 00:26:50,570 --> 00:26:53,115 create the kinds of communities that we want 672 00:26:53,115 --> 00:26:53,592 to live in. 673 00:26:55,023 --> 00:26:57,434 And it's it's to be done in a 674 00:26:57,434 --> 00:26:57,934 collective, 675 00:26:58,875 --> 00:26:59,375 collaborative, 676 00:27:02,154 --> 00:27:02,795 holy way. 677 00:27:04,005 --> 00:27:05,061 Not in a 678 00:27:06,783 --> 00:27:07,283 hierarchical, 679 00:27:09,322 --> 00:27:11,227 mean spirited competitive way. 680 00:27:13,473 --> 00:27:15,231 It it's it's a message that I got 681 00:27:15,231 --> 00:27:16,669 as a child, and it... 682 00:27:17,548 --> 00:27:18,507 It's been tested. 683 00:27:19,146 --> 00:27:20,185 I've tried other ways. 684 00:27:20,919 --> 00:27:23,316 But they've never felt off intake in the 685 00:27:23,316 --> 00:27:24,195 way this 1 does. 686 00:27:25,554 --> 00:27:28,770 Educator Betty Bi and earlier, Marshall Rosenberg. 687 00:27:29,244 --> 00:27:30,781 Author of non nonviolent 688 00:27:31,319 --> 00:27:33,234 communication, a language of life. 689 00:27:48,343 --> 00:27:51,533 You're listening to humankind. I'm David Freud, 690 00:27:52,092 --> 00:27:55,539 studio recording by Steve Colby at tutorial assistance 691 00:27:55,539 --> 00:27:56,659 from Thomas Royal, 692 00:27:57,539 --> 00:27:59,700 special thanks to Nancy Carlson Page. 693 00:28:00,339 --> 00:28:03,654 Our program is presented by human media in 694 00:28:03,868 --> 00:28:05,798 association with the network incorporated 695 00:28:06,330 --> 00:28:10,064 program development and support provided by short media. 696 00:28:11,508 --> 00:28:13,736 You can hear more episodes of our series 697 00:28:13,736 --> 00:28:18,213 at humankind podcast dot org. That's humankind podcast 698 00:28:18,603 --> 00:28:19,319 dot org. 699 00:28:19,876 --> 00:28:21,968 This segment on non nonviolent 700 00:28:22,423 --> 00:28:25,448 communication is humankind program number 100. 701 00:28:26,419 --> 00:28:29,610 If you enjoyed this episode, please consider leaving 702 00:28:29,610 --> 00:28:32,323 us a review at Apple podcast podcasts or 703 00:28:32,323 --> 00:28:33,680 another podcast service. 704 00:28:34,254 --> 00:28:36,491 It goes a long way in helping people 705 00:28:36,491 --> 00:28:38,250 find the kind series. 706 00:28:39,049 --> 00:28:41,846 If you'd like additional content not available on 707 00:28:41,846 --> 00:28:44,095 our podcasts you can head over to our 708 00:28:44,493 --> 00:28:48,480 Patreon page where we release monthly episodes. 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