Hey, humans. How's it going? Susan, Ruth here.
Thanks for listening to another episode of Hey Human Podcast.
Before I get into it,
I want to acknowledge that the past couple episodes have had some major
technical difficulties.
I've been working really hard to try and figure them out.
Never placed cords and turned dials and reloaded Zoom,
and I think I have fixed it. Uh, please be patient with me,
and I appreciate your patience through the previous episodes.
I'm doing all of this on my own, and I definitely learn in real time. Uh,
I know it sounds a little ooky on some of those previous episodes, but I,
I think I've fixed the problem. This is episode 3 83,
and I had a conversation with Anthony Rosano.
At 12 years old, Anthony was burned over 80% of his body.
His parents were told he would not survive.
He endured 43 surgeries, 134 blood transfusions,
a couple months in the hospital,
and the loss of his left hand,
he was given last rights three times.
He tells an interesting story of a memory he had while
basically straddling the line between life and death. I think that's accurate,
but he survived and beating every odd imaginable.
He pursued his love of sports and channeled his relentless spirit into
not only healing, but accomplishing incredible feats in his life,
including playing football. By the way, uh,
his new book Against All Odds, a Story of Faith, courage,
and Never Giving Up came out this year.
It was important to me to put out this episode right now,
uh, right away highlighting something good and inspirational.
Anthony's story moved me deeply, greatly. I hope it does.
You too.
I think humanity,
we have to keep shining the light in the good places and on the inspiration.
'cause it's really hard sometimes to
keep going and to believe that
love is greater and stronger than the bad
stuff that goes on in the world,
the horrific things that we find to do to each other.
Uh, yeah. And just know I'm lifting you up,
and I know you would be lifting me up as well.
And thank you for listening and for sharing this show with people.
Take care of each other, be kind,
be love. Hold each other up,
hold each other close when none of us know when our last day is.
And it's scary sometimes in the world.
Scary a lot of times in the world. And we need each other
to do. Remind people you love them,
especially if you haven't talked to them for a while. And
again, thank you. All right, here we go.
Hi.
Hey, how you doing?
Doing fine. How are you?
I'm doing well, thank you. Good.
I like that painting behind you.
Oh, thank you. I appreciate that.
Did you do that?
No, no. That's just, uh, something my wife had bought.
Oh, it's cool.
Yeah.
That's one of those kinds of paintings you could stare at for a while and see
something different every time.
Isn't that the truth? That's a, that's a good,
that's a good perspective on life also. Yeah.
That's a good metaphor for how we see humans, right?
Yeah. Yeah. It's true.
Do you have any questions before we start?
I'm excited. I just, uh, just wanted to let you know,
I'm real excited to be here and, and, uh, to talk with your audience,
and this is gonna be really cool.
Ano welcome to Hey, human.
Hey human. What's up, ?
How's it going?
It's going good. It's going real well. Uh, life's good. I'm happy.
And, um, I'm just excited for a lot of the things that are going on right now.
Well, good. Well, let's jump in. Tell me where you were raised,
where were you brought up?
I was born and raised in, uh, western Pennsylvania. Uh, new Castle, pa,
which is about, uh, 55 miles, uh, north of Pittsburgh.
Uh, just, uh, it, it's between Pittsburgh and Cleveland, Ohio. Uh,
so a very, uh, ethnic town, you know, a lot of, uh, people from,
uh, where our family originally, uh, originated in the Amalfi Coast in Italy,
uh, migrated to, uh, to New Castle in the early, uh,
20th century. Worked in the railroad steel industry and such. And, um,
and then it's just, uh, the, and it just was a really wonderful place to grow,
grow up and, uh, and, and be raised.
Have you been to the Amalfi Coast? I want to go there desperately.
I hear it's absolutely stunning.
You know, it is stunning. Now, I will say that I've been all around, uh,
Italy. I've been to Portugal, I've been to Spain, I've been to France.
I've been, uh,
to the Czech Republic and to Poland and all throughout Eastern Europe.
But unfortunately, I have yet to make it to, uh, to the Amalfi Coast.
And so that's something that I really am looking for,
I wanna do in the next year.
Good. You need to go see your homeland.
You know, we were planning on it, and, uh, we went to Europe in 2017. Bless you.
Then we went to, uh, Europe in 2019, and then Covid hit,
travel restrictions went on. We were supposed to go. And, you know,
then all of a sudden there was a lot of changes. So I really want to go though,
you know.
Well, next year, right?
There you go. Yeah.
Tell me, we're, we're closing in on Halloween, and, uh,
you, your story is really, first of all,
it's exceptional, in my humble opinion. Secondly,
it's a testament to human resilience. Uh,
let's talk about Halloween, 12 years old. You,
can you talk us through that day?
Absolutely. Um, now this is, this is interesting because, you know, the biggest,
uh, it, some of the dates, okay,
that took place in my life were just ironic. Um, Halloween day, 1987,
uh, my buddy and I were fool around. We were in my garage.
We got caught up doing things that we shouldn't have done. Uh,
we were sniffing gas, and, you know, trying to, it just was a stupid thing for,
you know, a 12 year old kid to do.
It was the only time in my life I ever did anything like that. And, you know,
my buddy without, you know, having any type of like, uh,
what I would consider intent, he flipped a match and my clothes set on fire,
you know, I loved it. I loved the kid to this day, and he admitted it later.
But that's, that's, that's just, it was an accident. Okay? Uh,
I was then, I was a ball, flames, you know, my, my, my pants caught on fire,
sweatpants, my jacket caught on fire, my shirt caught on fire.
I was a ball of flames all over my body. It was, uh, it was, it was quite,
you know, you know, remarkable. Like, I cannot even believe the way,
when I think about, uh,
what it was like to breathe in the fire and hear the crackling flames and
filling my skin melt off of me, it was just,
it's almost unbelievable that I could sit here with these memories. But,
you know, there was a piece that came over me in that fire also, uh,
which was very special and, and revealing. Um,
I like to think that it was the Lord that was saving me, or,
or the presence of an angel. Um, you know,
whatever that presence was, whether it was just a, you know,
your mind blocking out the,
the pain being so severe or whatever explanation that someone wants to
give, it was miraculous because to feel peace in the moment of,
of fire is, is just something that, you know,
for that pain to be taken away, so to speak. Um, but I,
I got outta my garage and my neighbor saw me, and they saw this,
this person on fire, and they immediately, uh, went into action.
And, uh, my neighbor, Mary Ryan, said to roll, roll, roll.
Um, and as she was saying that,
my other neighbors were looking out their back window, Mr. And Mrs. Uh,
Henry and Mary Hartman, and he, Mr. Hartman just ran to his garage.
He's happened to have an army blanket in there and grabbed it. And, uh,
as I rolled, I rolled into that blanket and then put the fire out. Um,
so in the, in the moments that that happened, uh, the,
the split seconds that it occurred, I may have been,
I don't know exactly how long I was on fire. Was it 30 seconds? Was it a minute?
It was a long enough time to burn my body, third degree burns,
87% of my body. Um, but in that amount of time,
my life had changed forever.
I, there are no words for that.
I don't even know exactly what to say to that other than how horrifying,
and I'm sorry that happened to you, but I know that from reading about you,
that you look at it as its own gift. And we'll get into that.
But in that moment, for as a 12 year old boy,
I was talking to my dad this morning, and, you know, he said, oh,
what are you doing today? And I said, I'm interviewing this man.
And he was burned up as a little kid and almost died several
times and kind of retelling the story. And I said, and he said, well,
how did it happen? A house fire? And I said, no, it wasn't that.
I said it was kids being kids.
It was kids being curious and getting into things,
because that's what kids do. And having, and,
and as you said, your friend flicked a match as a 12 year old kid,
as an adult, you think, how horrifying was he trying to light you on fire?
But as a 12 year old kid, the, the mind goes to,
there's not much, there's not much impulse control.
So the mind goes to what would happen if I threw a match right now? It's not,
it doesn't go through consequence.
I agree. I don't think he was trying to hurt me. And, and in fact, um,
I did have a lot of, you know, uh, regret and, and, uh,
animosity, especially later. Like not in my,
when I was fighting to get back on the football field,
when I was fighting for physical rehabilitation,
when I was going through high school and dealing with,
I didn't have time to think about, you know, my emotions or deal with it,
or I was just trying to live a normal life. But then later into my adulthood,
it started to catch up. You know, your mind starts to, you know, it,
it just,
the way that the human condition is you put something off for so long to deal
with it, and then all of a sudden it just like you,
one day you wake up and you're like, what happened to me? Okay, what,
what, what took place here? And you know, I, so, you know,
everybody has their different thing, you know,
and I can't say that I'm holier than thou,
but I will say that I have a lot of faith in God. And,
and I know that God saved my life. Um, you know,
whether or not I believe in Jesus Christ,
whether you believe in and call God something different, you call God Allah,
you, you say, God is Buddha, you say, uh, God is the universe.
I have respect and believe that all people who are good people and love God.
So that's not what I'm here really to, to say. But I believe in Jesus Christ.
And I turn to my church and my faith to try to reconcile a lot of,
of my own emotions. You know? And I'll never forget a day in, uh,
in 2000 and, uh, 19, okay.
And I took my family to the pool, okay? Uh,
which was 30 miles away from my house. So it wasn't like a close pool.
It was like a pool that you had to drive to, right?
And I dropped him off a Saturday afternoon, and there was a church next door,
and I was just feeling like I needed something to get in my spirit. Well,
I went to church, came back, saw where my family was, sitting at the pool,
put my stuff down, sat down on the chair, not thinking twice about it,
who was sitting next to me. It was my friend who flicked the match.
Ironically, haven't saw him in 15 years, right?
Haven't saw him in 15 years. Just, I was praying, who's sitting next to me?
Well, we had, it was awkward for a minute,
but then we had a day where we played catch in the water.
Our kids played together, we talked all day. And at the end of the day,
we never brought up the accident, talked about our lives. At the end of the day,
we hugged each other, kissed on the cheek. I told him, I love you.
He told me he loved me. And it was a moment of healing, like unbelievable.
Now, it doesn't stop there, because here we go, my daughter and I,
then the next week we're thinking, oh my goodness,
what a beautiful spirits working right now we go to,
we go to church on a Saturday. We never go to church on Saturday, okay? We,
that day for the, we went to four o'clock mass,
sat in our pew and in our faith, they have this, uh, you at,
at a certain part of the mass, you shake hands and say, peace be with you,
and you offer somebody peace. Okay? Well, as it would turn out,
the woman who turned around to say, peace be with you at the four o'clock mess,
who was it?
It was his mother and his father sitting right in front of me.
We didn't even know they were there. Kiss on the face had a, a, a moment.
And so call it the Holy Spirit. That's what I believe that is.
Call it the human spirit. Call it the way of healing.
Whatever you want to assign to it.
It was just a beau beautiful moment of healing. And, and so I don't,
I don't really have any type of animosity toward my friend. I love him,
love his family. They've always been supportive.
It was just something that happened that, uh, that was unfortunate. You know.
I would say that that is a perfect example of grace.
Yeah, it was a beautiful grace.
Something that I could have never gotten on my own.
Tell me about what it was like, like in the healing of, uh,
post-fire. You're in the hospital nearly two months, is that correct?
Two and a half months.
A hundred plus blood transfusions, 30 odd surgeries.
How many surgeries did you have?
Well, at this time, I, I know that at one point I had 43 surgeries. Wow. Um,
I've had a few since then. You know, I had 134 br blood transfusions. I had,
uh, there was, they said if I lived for a day, I would die in three days.
If I lived for three days, I would die in three weeks of infection.
I was fortunate to make it through the first night.
I made it fir through the first three nights. And, um, and it got bad. See,
I was burned on Halloween day, but then the infection got so severe, uh,
like 10 days in that I had gangrene in my left hand.
And as it would turn out,
I would have to have the top half of my hand amputated. Well,
as fate would have it, that happened on Friday the 13th. So now Halloween,
Dan burn, Friday the 13th, which is interesting. My, my hand is amputated.
And then three weeks into the, uh, the situation in, in the hospital,
um, I now had three bots of sepsis, uh, sepsis. I had, uh,
my last rates given to me three times. And my heart would not get regulated.
My heart was beating 189 beats a minute for three consecutive days.
They put me in a drug induced coma, and it wouldn't slow down.
They did everything that they could do. My blood pressure was 49 over 20.
My temperature was 106. They gave me every medicine that they could give me.
And finally they had to have the talk with my parents that said, look,
we did it all.
And your heart can't beat at 189 beats a minute, inevitably.
So we can't give him any more medication. It's just,
it's, he's not gonna make it through the night. You know,
it's just physically impossible.
It would be like running a marathon continuously for three and four days.
He just, nobody could survive that. Well, my parents set up a vigil in my room,
and, uh, they, they packed.
They were kept putting ice on my wrist and my neck on my ankles.
They were prayed over me. They, the family, everyone thought I was gonna pass.
So all kinds of people gathered from my hometown, like 70,
80 people and family members, they were praying all night. Um, my,
my, uh, priest,
father Morrow Ella brought in a little Italian lady from the north side of
Pittsburgh. She anointed me with this oil, whether it's from, there's, I never,
I don't know where it was from. It was either from Jerusalem.
Some people said it was from a crying Mary statue. I just don't know. Okay.
So when I talk about it, it's like hard for me. It was a special oil. Okay?
And, uh, and my cousin from Chicago, named Eugene Ranieri,
he sent a letter,
which I found later when I was writing my book with that was attached to
a pink handkerchief with blessed oil. And he said to wipe it on my face,
and I would survive. Now, the little old lady anointed me,
and she prayed in front of my bed. And that after she was done praying,
she hugged my mother. Now, this is at a time when they said,
make funeral arrangements. She hugged my mother and said,
your boy's gonna be just fine. Okay? Now,
that's a pretty risky thing to say in that moment. But she said,
your boy's gonna be just fine. And Eugene, my cousin,
sent in his note that my parents received that day, touch my face,
and your son will be healed. Well, the next morning, they,
now they stopped with the medicine. The next morning
when I was supposed to have passed overnight, my blood pressure was stable,
my heart rate was stable. My fever had gone away.
And the doctor, Dr. Slater, who was just, he's very stoic man.
Someone that just very stoic, man, I love him. Okay? He passed away. Now,
I spoke at his, uh, at the, at when there was a ceremony, uh,
for his passing for the burn unit. Um,
he came in and he looked under my blankets and or my, my dressings,
and said, incredible, okay.
And I'll never forget the way he said. Incredible. It was just with this tone,
you know? And, um, and two weeks later,
I was on my feet taking my first step, you know? So it was just,
uh, remarkable the transition that happened.
And, uh, on Christmas day, now, another, you know, you know,
holiday, so to speak, you know, definitely a holiday, you know, celebration.
That's when Dr.
Goldfarb came to my room and told my family the big news that I would survive.
I was gonna make it, I'd be able to go home. You know? So it was just, uh,
to think back on that time in that hospital,
I did nothing except endure . I laid there, I laid there, you know,
and I endured it. I was able to endure, but it wasn't in my own strength. Uh,
there was lots of prayers around me. And so it teaches us sometimes when,
when life is the most difficult, and you're,
you have the most pressure on you sometimes, you know,
we run ourselves out just trying to put effort in to clear it.
And there's other times that we just have to sit down and be still and let it
pass and, uh, and have faith in the goodness of tomorrow, and it's gonna come.
And, and that's one of those moments that taught me that.
When you would lose your hand, was there somebody,
were you awake and aware of that, or did you find that out after the fact?
No, I was, so what happened is when you're intubated in, in, like,
in my situation, I, they were able to take the, the tube out,
okay. And, you know,
and take and reduce the amount of medication that I was on so that
my, my organs didn't shut down. So, um, I was intubated.
But then they, Dr. Moy, um, who was just,
he had passed away too. Dr. Moy was, um, he was a great man.
I remember he walked with, he had a club foot, which is kind of, uh,
interesting to think back on, okay. Because when he would walk into your room,
it, you, it just was a, it was pronounced in his gate,
like the way that he walked, you could see it. It's not so being there. And,
uh, I, I always, I, I, I'll never forget, they took me into the, uh,
occupational therapy room. And Dr.
Moy came in and I was up in a wheelchair. And, um,
my parents couldn't bear to tell me, okay? And, and I'm sitting there,
I was lucid. I'm obviously, they were giving me a lot of pain medicine, but Dr.
Moy had explained that, um,
there was an infection in my left hand that it wasn't going to
get better. And it was,
that infection was causing me to get ill in a way that was
presenting a risk to my life. And, uh,
and I understood what he meant. And I said to him, quite
like, I said, please save my life and not my hand.
That's what I said to him. And, um, you know, it was,
I'll never forget those moments, that conversation that, um, that,
that exchange, he said it to me in a loving way, but a matter of fact way.
And I understood the seriousness of it, you know, for a long time. I mean,
honestly, when I lost my hand,
it was the most painful 'cause it was so swell that even
in a room, like when I would have to keep it up on a, on a,
a table above my bed. But like when a, a door,
you're in a big hospital room, but when the door would shut,
there's very small vibration. That little vibration will cause a chilling pain.
But what I have learned through the years and in
reconciliation of my own, uh,
trauma was
a very important lesson about them.
And the lesson was that if they did not remove that
part of my hand, okay,
then I would've died.
But my hand was already infected to the point, and burned to the point,
or hit had died even though it was a part of me.
So sometimes as we go through our lives, there are relationships
that are a part of us,
but that relationship died long before we let it go. Or.
It's diseased.
Or it's diseased,
or there is a job that we're in that we're no
longer called for,
or there's a habit that we have that is causing us illness,
or there's, there's,
there's dead or diseased parts of our life that we
have to let go of in order for us to survive and become the best version
of ourselves that we can. Now, mine happened in the physical,
but most of these lessons that we all have to learn haven't happened in the
mental or the spiritual.
And it took me a long time to let go of the notion
of, of, of feeling bad for,
for what happened to my hand until it clicked that
you have to let go of those things in your life,
even if they mean something to you,
if they're causing you harm or they're poisoning the rest of your life or your
future. And I think that's a lesson that we all, as human beings,
need to understand and learn. It's very difficult at times.
As a kid who has a whole future ahead of them.
And you were a football fan and, and into sports and,
and wanting to play. And I think about a 12 year old boy too,
just a, you know, on the precipice of girls and,
and life and do all that kind of stuff. What,
how did you come to terms with that?
I'm sure you had people around you trying to help you through it,
but nobody can really help you through that. You have to be there for yourself,
ultimately. How did you find that piece as you were going?
Or did you not until you were an adult?
Well, I was blessed. Okay. So I was a kid. I developed early.
So at 11 years old, I was already built like someone who was a lot older,
you know? So, you know, that was the year of, uh, going into junior high.
I had my first kiss be that summer, and that was really something that,
you know, that's every boy, every girl remembers their first kiss. And so,
you know, that was sweet. Um, you know, and then I was a pretty good athlete,
you know, and, and I was always playing with the kids older than me. So I was,
I was pretty talented. And, um, and that I had a future in athletics.
And I knew, you know, because my family, where we came from,
and I just loved it and had this aggressive nature. And on the football field,
on the baseball field,
I was a better football player than baseball player at the time. But, um,
but that's, it's something that I loved. So the idea,
when I was in that hospital, see, I went to this,
I went from elementary school in my community to, uh, lar to a big junior high.
So these were the first two months of that junior high. So now,
this was the first time that I was meeting all the kids from all over time,
you know, and we were just becoming friends, and I was having so much fun being,
taking the step from elementary school to junior high. I loved it.
It kind of got in my heart.
So the whole time I was in the hospital, I just had this,
I couldn't let go of that, that love for, you know,
growing up and being one of the older kids now, and the idea of,
of playing sports.
And so playing ball and getting back on the football field was really a calling
card for me. It was really a, a passion,
or it was really the, the, the job or the,
the thing that was set out there in the future that I knew that everything that
I was fighting for,
everything that I was enduring during this time was some that was worth it
to me. I wanted to go and walk into that ultimate destiny.
That was a dream at the time. And, but when you're a 12 year old,
your dreams, you feel you can do anything. And, and the doctors, my parents,
my mom and dad, my brother, nobody ever made me feel like I couldn't,
okay. And I always believed that I could,
and especially my dad, you know,
my dad said to me in the emergency room when he's,
when it looked the absolute worst,
he came up to me and he kissed me on my forehead. He said,
you don't worry about a thing. We're all gonna walk outta here together.
And we did. You know?
So we did walk out of there together, no matter how hard it was.
So walking out of there together was said it was 0% chance.
So the notion that I wasn't gonna be on the football field again,
you could have told me it was a 5% chance. Well,
that was way better than I had the chance of being,
of even getting out of that hospital, what was gonna happen, you know?
So I lived my life as a teenager,
and then as at an adolescent in this state of denial
where I put a brave face on,
and I moved forward every single day the best that I could. And,
and I didn't acknowledge my limitations,
and I didn't acknowledge my disability, and I didn't acknowledge my pain.
And, um, and, you know, I, I had a really good time in high,
junior high and high school. I always had a girlfriend. Every, I always did.
I never remember a, a time where, you know,
there I was treated different than like that. You know,
I had some really special people in my life in junior high and high school.
And then I met my wife Katie, in, in college.
We've been together for a long time, since 1995.
We've been married for now 24 years. And so, um, you know,
but life is an, is a constant up and down and a beautiful struggle. And, um,
the adjustment, I think that I was really blessed to have some great friends,
uh, tremendous support system, uh, teachers who understood me,
uh, coaches who may not have ever thought it was possible,
but gave me a chance to start slow and grow and get,
and become who it was that I would end up being and gave me a
chance to become whole again. And, um,
and I'm very thankful for each and every one of those people, because they're,
they're responsible for my healing in many ways. And, you know,
they have long since maybe have passed and or, or gone in my life, you know, or,
you know, life changes.
But they made a difference to some young boy back in
1987 to 1993.
And that young boy is now a grown man who is, uh,
very thankful for it.
You spoke of your ability to compartmentalize and not really
think about the emotional or maybe the p t ss D of it all,
and that as an adult, you were
faced with that and having to understand it and what it was.
How did that catharsis come about?
Well, you just, um, the thing about it is, as a kid,
when you're on a football field, okay?
And you are faced with adrenaline rushes, okay?
It's a good thing, right? You know, when,
when you're going through physical therapy and you're having to reach your arms
above your head and hands and break the skin under your under to just to
straighten up and to stand,
and you go through these massive adrenaline rushes and tears are coming in
your eyes, and people are celebrating that, right? They're like, wow,
look how strong this kid is. You know? Now, as an adult,
when you're going through stressful moments and this adrenaline comes out,
and you, and that same adrenaline rush happens,
it's all of a sudden manifests itself in terms of anger or depression,
and you don't know how to handle it.
Sometimes the switch goes off and you're in a moment, you're like,
what is going on here? Okay. And so, you know,
you have to be reflective.
And I can say that I am reflective now going through such trauma.
You can't, you have to learn to, at one point, you have to say to yourself,
I forgive myself for what I went through. I forgive God for what I went through.
I forgive my parents for what I went through. I forgive all the pers, uh,
the, the pro. And then only then,
and only then can you start to find some peace. Now,
when you also recognize that this is a part of your character, like I have,
I can't say that I don't have P T S D because it's not,
I don't choose to just, like, if you have a broken leg, you can't say, ah,
you know, I no longer have a broke, uh, my leg iss not broke.
I can't hope myself out of there. Okay?
But what I can do is understand the circumstance and understand that,
you know, someone faced with such trauma,
now their brain lets off different chemicals in different
situations, that you have to understand that and know how to dial yourself back.
So it's a lifetime struggle. And I'm not here to say that, you know,
I have better control today, and I have, and I'm, and I'm a good human being.
I'm a loving husband and father. And,
but I'm here to also say that when you, that people,
we go through things, we have to learn to understand ourselves, cope and,
and understand that, hey, I am who I am,
and I have to keep myself in a position where I am
being good to people always. And, and I accept myself,
and I see those situations.
When I start to get a little bit nervous or stressed,
that's when I walk away, you know? That's when I feel that moment coming on.
That's when I get out of the conversation.
When I feel that s that's when I remove myself from the relationship.
And that's just, um, and that's, and so now at the age of 48,
I'm able to deal with things a lot better than I was maybe when I was, uh, 25,
you know? So.
Do you get the phantom fingers that people talk about who lose
limbs? Do you feel any of that?
Um, not really. You know, they, I did earlier in my life. I,
I had maybe some feelings, but, you know, I'm an athlete, you know,
so I could catch a ball. Uh, I could, I put a glove on my hand,
I could play catch with my son.
That was one of the most beautiful healing moments of my life.
When first time I put on a glove with him when he was seven,
and just playing catch normal at this point, you know,
36 years removed from my accident, it's, uh,
you know, my left hand is, it's pretty, I'm pretty good. I mean,
I could hit a golf ball, 250 yards, you know? And, um, you know,
and I have had some, some really good blessings in terms of,
of learning about myself, uh, what my capabilities and limitations are.
Um,
and learning how to dial that energy that is,
is, uh, that drove me. Because people either have a fight or a flight instinct,
right? You know, that's, that's who we are.
When we're faced with adversity and trauma,
we either are gonna fight or we're gonna run. Okay?
Why have a fight mentality?
When you have that and you learn how
to dial it into your business endeavors, to,
to control it in the way that you approach your work environment,
and you live with passion and your relationships and the way that you raise your
kids and the way that you teach them,
that is a difference maker in other people's lives.
So earlier in my life, when I didn't have that control of,
of my own emotions and di earlier in that day,
in those days, it would be a negative consequence.
But now pushing things and,
and understanding how to live with one hand and understanding how to deal with,
uh, the things that I've dealt with now, it's,
it's really fueled a lot of the growth I've had in my life and that I share with
other people.
When Halloween comes around, do you find yourself getting more anxious?
Or are you now at a point where it doesn't affect you? Like that.
I did for years. Yeah, I really did, honestly, and,
and it was through writing this book that, that really, uh,
that changed my perspective. I shed so many tears in writing this book.
I mean, if you, if you've read the book, um,
it is a really detailed analysis of
everything that I went through. So you read it, it's a sin.
You can almost feel the pain at times, and you could,
you can almost feel what it was like to go through everything. And,
and you realize how raw it was that my writing is raw
and you feel it. Well, when I was writing it in that fashion,
I also felt it,
which would cause tears to come down my face almost every day for two years.
Very lucky to have people that I worked with on the process that,
that helped me. And, and, uh,
and it was in tackling that process that I started to recognize these
days, this Halloween day as a different, as different.
Instead of it being the worst day, it gave birth to this new me.
Okay? Um, that day is the day that I went through a metamorphosis. Uh,
a lot of 12 year olds transfer or go through puberty or at that
age, and they go from a, a boy to a man,
or a young girl to a young woman, and, and their bodies change.
And they, mine was just so pronounced, okay,
that now I feel that it's a gift.
It's a gift that I get to talk to other burn patients and other people who've
gone, gone through, uh, serious accidents, injuries, uh,
people who've battled addiction,
people who've gone through the loss of a loved one, or,
or somebody who's just building a business in his face in a really hard time,
getting where they wanna be.
And I get to tell them and inspire them and talk to them about
what my own dilemmas were, my psychological, physical,
all the dilemmas were. I get to be honest with them.
And I get to tell them that, look, there's another side, okay?
There's another side to this. Okay? There's a place that you're gonna be,
you're gonna go, and here's how you get there. Here's your roadmap.
And that I found that,
that that's why now being in this unique position where I can share these things
and I could be a part of someone's life, and I could tell them,
it's okay if you have P T s D, it's okay. If you feel like it.
Sometimes you're overwhelmed and you can't get yourself to calm down, it's okay.
Because now that you understand that you can now have the ability to master
that and use it for positive change in your life. And that,
I feel that that's a real blessing to have that, to sit in that seat.
Yeah. And the book is called Against All Odds.
Yes. And it's against all odds. A, uh,
a story of faith, courage, and never giving up. And it's a,
it's just an amazing book. When you read it, I think that you will just love it.
We were very fortunate to be published by Wiley, a,
a large international publishing company. I was very fortunate to meet, uh,
you know, lady named, uh, Charlie Fusco, uh, who's my literary agent,
and I now consider her my mentor. Uh, she taught me so much about,
uh, having gratitude and, and the way that when you start to think about,
uh, you know, you let go of that, uh,
unforgiveness and you start to believe and,
and be thankful and have gratitude for all the things in your life as your
perspective changes. And, and those are, uh,
these are all very positive lessons. And, you know, and it's just beautiful.
What, what comes outta writing, the writing this book. But, you know,
the stories that are coming back to me now of the conversations that I'm having
with people who are calling me and saying, I read your book.
I'm getting messages on LinkedIn. I'm getting messages on Facebook,
I'm getting messages on Instagram, random emails from my website, uh,
telephone calls to my business where I'll be on the phone with someone I never
met for an hour or more, talking about this story and how it affected them.
I was talking to a guy yesterday, he is a president of a, a title company in,
in North Carolina. He called me, he says, listen, he goes,
when I read the story about your dad saying, looking in your eyes and saying,
take my strength, it crushed me. He said, it broke me,
is the words he used, because I could just see my son in,
in having that moment with him. And,
and it just showed me the importance of being a good dad. You know?
And then I had another guy call me who, you know, he told me, listen,
he goes, I read your book, and I gotta tell you that I,
I grew up in a good family in a middle class neighborhood,
but then I found myself on drugs. He found, I,
I found myself addicted to, to pain medication. He goes,
and pretty soon I was living at the, uh, at the shelter. I had a garbage bag,
full clothes. He goes, I looked myself up. I said, where am I? He goes,
now, today I make $150,000 a year.
I'm a partner of two different businesses. I'm married with two kids. He goes,
and I came from that addiction to this place,
and I read your story and all those, your story's different.
I identify with what you went through in such a profound way, you know,
and I can just go on and on and on about the conversation. I had a lady call,
she said that she lost her husband. Her husband was a teacher,
and her husband was her life. And, and she loved him so much,
but saw him suffering for so many years. He could hardly eat.
He had a feeding tube in. And she said that, reading your story,
it gave me hope on understanding that there was a spirit that saved you.
Your pain helped me to, in my faith,
to understand that my husband's in the right place.
And that if I can just live through and adapt that,
that my life is gonna be better too. So,
having the opportunity to write this book against all odds and share this
message of hope with people and, and tell, and they get that,
and it's just very, very special.
It's hard to believe people can endure the things that they endure and get to
the other side,
and with you to get to the other side and have so much understanding
of, of yourself, and, uh,
be able to articulate it in a way that it leads others
to that same kind of peace. It's really,
it makes you wonder about the whole web of things.
It's true, because it, you know, the, the fact of the matter is,
is that I'm just a, uh,
I'm just a guy who was born in a small town in western Pennsylvania.
Um, my mom, when I was growing up, was a beautician.
She made $300 a week, okay? My mom and dad went through a, a terrible divorce,
and they loved each other, but they couldn't be married to each other, right? I,
I'm just a kid who grew up wanting to play football. And truthfully,
I'm no special than more special than any other person on this planet.
I'm just a human being, you know?
And I was just faced with some extraordinary circumstances,
and I was given this blessing and grace by God of, of healing,
you know? And through it all,
I felt many times I felt yesterday, okay,
I felt today, okay, I will fail. That's what I,
that life is all about. So I can't say that, you know,
this journey is over or has even been perfect from here on out.
But I could say the lessons that I've learned is that we all fall down.
And the idea that our government leaders are perfect,
or the people in the public eye are perfect, or,
or these people live these per, it's not true. None of it's true.
What's true is they fall every day that you get up every day and you
fight again. And you know, we're all gonna have battles.
And every time you step up to that next level in life,
there's a new set of challenges for you that awaits you.
And when you start to walk, and God's will in your life,
and you start to walk, and you want, and, and the universe is destiny,
and who you are in your best life,
you start to walk the way of, of Christ, or, or, or, or God,
the Father, however you wanna pronounce it. When you start to walk that way,
lemme tell you something, that's when it gets a lot harder.
That's when the temptations are greater,
that's when it's easier to give into your own selfish desires
and wants.
So it's not that you ever arrive to this point in your life where,
oh, I am so enlightened. At least I haven't gotten there. Okay,
I hope to get there someday. But it's,
you don't reach this point where you're so enlightened that you no longer feel
sadness, or you no longer feel anger, or you never talk outta line,
or you never,
but what happens is you now get to this place where you have
a little bit of remorse when you feel, when you said something the wrong way,
or you have a little bit of, uh, of, of,
of gravity to your stuff that says, you know,
I have to reflect on what I did and said in that moment. And, you know,
if you can't check yourself in this world and you can't check, uh,
your own work and your own and your own behavior, and,
and the work environment, the athletic field, no matter where you are,
then somebody's gonna have to check you. You know? And that's the way it is.
And so, you know, that's a,
those are a lot of the lessons that you learn along the way. And I,
I'm committed to a lifetime of learning,
and I hope that the listeners out there, uh, will,
will pick up my book and they'll read it, because number one, it will help you.
And number two, it's, it sends a message. And number three,
every time somebody reads a story, I could feel it in a way. And,
uh, and it also helps a little bit of my healing. So I'm given to you,
but when you're reading this, you're given back to me,
and that's something that I'm very thankful for.
Did you experience in, I know that you died or came close to death,
near death experience during the ordeal.
Did you have any memory of that? Did you see anything or,
or talk to anyone during that time?
Well, it's almost, uh, surreal to talk about, okay? Because,
you know, you just don't, it's, it's hard to wrap your head around,
okay? I remember when I was on fire,
I had a moment where there was an extreme peace that came over me,
and I remember feeling and seeing myself, okay?
I, I don't know how to explain it. Did I have an out-of-body experience? Does,
did my brain just remember it that way? Because it was so profound,
I couldn't testify to either of those things and say that I know with
certainty,
I was in the middle of being on fire burning at a thousand degrees,
and my recollection of it is clear that the pain went away.
And I remember seeing myself, but I never looked in the face of God,
but I felt God's presence.
I also remember when I was in the hospital,
having moments where
it felt like I was walking around the hospital.
And it came up later in life where when I was released from the hospital,
um, my mom and I would've to go back often, and,
and I'd have to find my doctor's office, which was in the hospital,
or we'd walk. It was a big hospital, and I knew my way around . Okay?
So, and my mom and I talk about this with, I don't know how to explain it,
because I'm not crazy, okay? Number one,
and I never had a moment where, you know, I was approached by an angel.
I n never had a moment where I looked in the face of God.
I never had a moment where my grandfather or grandmother came.
That never happened.
But I had moments of peace and quiet and,
and, and in then there was an enormous amount of peace, okay?
I didn't rise up. I wasn't in the heavens. I, but there was amount of peace,
okay? In this moment of affliction that is almost unexplainable.
So whether you wanna attribute it to a special
spirit or, or however you want to, to reconcile it,
I don't think that it really matters, because in the end,
what we learn is that in our most
pain, when we're going through the hardest moment of our life,
when we are on,
have one foot on the side of the fence of death,
and one foot on the side of the fence of life, okay?
If you feel a peace in that moment,
then you can rest assure
that there is a greater force
than just the skin that you're living in. Now,
I came to this conclusion through my faith,
but I also have this recognition that
my life was not saved for me, okay?
My life was saved so that my children could be born.
And there is no other reason that my life would've been saved,
okay? Because if God took me, and if I died at that moment,
then I would've went to heaven, and I would've had eternal peace.
Mark Twain said,
I'm not afraid of death because I was dead for billions of years before I was
alive. And no harm to me was done in that moment.
So if I had died,
I would've been in a moment of peace for, for the rest of time.
So if God wanted me to have that moment of peace,
he could've let me have it then.
But the only thing tangible that has come from me,
from my flesh and blood that will live on are my children.
So it was for them,
because if I was passed and they would buy definition not be
around today. So it was their lives that came through me.
And so I understand,
I've come to a lot of different understandings here through the course of,
of writing my book. And through the course of my life,
I struggled substantially with my parents' divorce, okay?
And it was always a, a, a hard thing to deal with. Now,
my mother, Janet, who is just this very strong person,
she was the baby of her family. Well, in 1977,
her father died when she was just 29 years old, okay?
And 1984, my mother and father broke up,
and it just devastated my mother.
I now recognize that my mother being the baby in her family,
and I've been able to communicate this to her,
that if she did not lose her father in 1977,
then she would never have been able to keep her sanity through
the, her the loss of her marriage in 1984. Now,
my mother and father have a, a love, they talk on the phone every day together,
okay? To this day, they love each other, they're best of friends.
But I also have recognized that God knew I
was gonna go through this accident,
but if my mother didn't lose her husband and her father
and her mother,
she would've never had this ability to get on her knees while I was in the
hospital and say to God, listen, God, you took my father, my,
you took my marriage. You allowed that to end. You took my mother.
You can't have my son. I need him.
And it was with that power,
that powerful prayer that I cannot lose anymore,
that opened up the ears of God to save my life in a situation
that was unexplainable. And I know that my father,
who's my best friend, we've had our times where we weren't,
but he's my best friend. He's the strongest man I know on the planet, okay?
He is. But I know for certain that my father,
if he didn't have that little bit of guilt saying, ah, you know,
I wish I wouldn't have left. Maybe this wouldn't have happened if I was,
if our marriage didn't break, if he,
he wouldn't have been able to ski on his knees with the same authority and to
say, God, I know I made a mistake, but don't cost,
don't let this boy lose his life.
He wouldn't have been able to pray the same prayer and give me the same
strength,
and them coming together to love me in that emergency room wouldn't have
meant as much if it was a daily dinner.
So what I learned is all the suffering that we go through in our lives,
all that suffering is building us for a moment that
we're gonna need in the future, a strength that we're gonna need to rely upon,
or an ability to call on God in a way
that we couldn't, had we not gone through that suffering.
And I've learned that which made me able to forgive
for the divorce and forgive for the loss,
because now I realize that in my own suffering,
I'm able to be here with you. And I'm able to sit here and say,
I'm still standing.
And give you the strength to know that no matter what you've gone through,
no matter what suffering it is, you are still standing.
And if you're out there hearing me feeling bad about your circumstance,
feeling bad about that breakup, feeling bad about that addiction,
you're feeling bad about the losses that you had in your life,
just understand your, you are still standing,
and that's the power and suffering. So it's not otherworldly.
It may be from within, but let me tell you something,
it's true and it's righteous and it's correct. Forgive everyone.
You can be glad for every circumstance you had,
be thankful for all that you're given,
and you could move on and you can tell the story. I'm still standing.
And on that note, just never give up.
Tell everyone where they may find you.
Well, you could, um, go to our website is uh,
www.anthonyano.com,
and that's a n t h o n y, ano,
R A Z Z A N o. Here's my, my book. Here's the, the correct spelling.
Uh, again.
Still odds they can't see it 'cause the audio podcast.
Oh, okay. Okay, okay. Okay. It's on Amazon, Barnes and Nobles, uh,
Walmart Target, you could buy it on my website. Um, I'm sure the,
the website again is www dot anthony ano,
a n t h o n y r a z z a n o.com.
And you have an Instagram.
I have an Instagram, Anthony dot ano, I got a, you could visit, uh, my Facebook,
Anthony Ano and I have a, uh, insta uh,
a Facebook page against the Odds as well.
And I'll put links to everything on hey human podcast.com,
so it's easy for people to get to if they need. Thank you for listening,
everyone. This is a real special episode. Uh, it's a good reminder.
I think all of us are going through something and it's
so hard to remember to,
to hang in there and that we can get back up again,
you know, fall down nine, get up 10.
So thank you for being on the show.
Thank you. I've really loved it.
This is actually one of the best experiences that I've had on a podcast. Yes,
I podcast. I just find that, uh, you're outstanding. And, um,
and if there's anything I could ever do for you, please let me know.
Thank you so much, Anthony.
All right, we'll talk soon. Take care. Bye-bye. Yeah. Bye bye.
Rate review and subscribe to Hey,
human on iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts. Thanks,
bye.