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Welcome. You're listening to K Wood, Shu, the

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podcast that pulls back the curtains in your

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mind.

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We like to shed a little light on

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why you're thinking, what's your thinking.

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Everyone has a choice in life in enlightened

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how they think.

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Together, we're going to focus on high functioning

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habits. There is no more time to live

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with any sort of regret. Coulda, Woulda, should.

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The inspirational podcast for the inspired. Let's get

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into today's show with your host Shelly r

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She.

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Hello, World. Shelley Ro here and welcome to

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the show.

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Listen, I was terribly sorry about the last

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podcast breaking the habit of being yourself. I

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was in our home and, and I didn't

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have my proper sound set up, and I

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listened to it. Today noticing that with the

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headset I was using, there was a bit

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of a buffet noise,

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which means I had the speaker too close

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to my mouth. So I pal apologize eyes

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for that.

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Lots going on. And, you know, there's just

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been so much on my mind lately because

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we've been super busy, so share a little

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what's going on.

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And the challenges that,

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you know, you face in life when there's

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change.

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So I just thought, okay. What I wanna

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talk about? I thought, okay. Do it? You

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do Shelly, when you want to

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share, but you're

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uncertain

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go to the book that you love to

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go to. And sure enough today's date

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making a fresh start.

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It always just never cease it to amaze

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me how the universe can answer because guys,

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that is what I'm going through right now

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in my life. It's... It's everything that's going

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on in our lives is right now.

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So we went on a cruise, my girlfriend

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and I back in June.

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For my birthday to Alaska. I never been.

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I mean, I live here I'm a resident

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of British Columbia, Canada,

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and people broke all over the world come

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to see. Our amazing scenery and seeing here

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the history.

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Our men had no interest if there wasn't

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a beach pool well, there was a pool,

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but it certainly wasn't Caribbean weather.

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We had a wonderful time. Just a wonderful

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time. And the glaciers well wonderful to see

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and the history was interesting, and just spend

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time with my girlfriend who was so easy

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to travel with, and we made these... We

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met these amazing people people, especially the couple

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from the New Zealand

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Aussie connection,

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that ended up sitting beside us. We've met

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them out outside on the ship somewhere. And

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then they ended up sitting. Right beside is

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at dinner. So we've we spent kind of

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part of the cruise with them and had

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stayed in touch, and they were just wonderful.

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Such amazing people.

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And

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Sal is Italian board, Australian.

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And his wife is

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it's a kiwi. So

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it was... It's always interesting when people

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again, make fresh starts in their life, things

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change, you know, it's houses pass.

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Divorce happens, children are grown.

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And then you meet a companion, and you

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just click, and it was just was just

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wonderful. We had... We had great fun, dance,

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eat too much food. So anyways, it came

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home to the chore.

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We've been taught contemplating for a number of

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months of listing our house.

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We have spent the last number of months,

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really looking at things in our lives. That's

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why I haven't been podcasting regularly and I

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apologize.

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I've been going through a lot emotionally mentally

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and physically,

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something else has sort of gone wrong and,

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like, are you kidding me? I had my

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hip replaced it just over a year ago,

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and you know, it's, like, 6 months to

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heal properly, and then I was thinking, this

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is great. I can walk better and

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than the left side. I have severe stenosis

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in my back And I guess we've pinched

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a nerve with a deteriorating disk and I'm

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like, are you kidding me?

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So after I went down through my little

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pity potty of back feeling sorry for myself.

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We had to get this house listed because

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we have talked about the fact that, yes.

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The cruise was wonderful, but I came home

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and had to dress for days. It was

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very hard on me physically.

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I sure adrenaline got me through it, but

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then, you know, you have to recover So,

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Keith and I looked each other and went

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we need to be aware of that, like,

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more aware because we do want to travel

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here coming up, we're hoping to go to

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Spain in the fall. That being said, you

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know, we have to take into account what's

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going on in our lives physically.

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My husband

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is going to retire from his full time

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job and work part time on contract. With

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the same company because he loves what he

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does He's a great trainer, and great with

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dealing with the dealers, but the day in

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day stress,

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of

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of that level is just... Can you do

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it yes? Does he want to? No?

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No. We're we're just we're she's now and

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it's like,

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we've had so many people have unexpected deaths

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or things go wrong around us. We're like,

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what if waiting for. I live in an

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area where the housing prices went insane. So

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if we could cash out of this and

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move into the little old house sign paired

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it up in the in the Oak Oregon

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Valley.

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We can look quite comfortably

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and and just keep searching for our next

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house because we just haven't found what we're

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looking for up there.

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So this is really a fresh start for

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us,

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and

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starts and changes are never easy. It has

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been very stressful.

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We're not

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changing our mind. We're not questioning what we're

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doing.

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The process of making it happen is exhausting.

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We had no idea how much work is

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involved in listing house and getting it ready

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to be staged.

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So my husband who was being, not very

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supportive for for a bit. They're rolling his

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eyes at me saying, you know, what I'm

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saying Honey, We... This is week get all

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this done. It was until the realtor kind

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of gave him a come to Jesus talk

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and said, hey, we need this this and

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this done, pictures are being done here. Stage

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arrives here Keith went. Oh,

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Crap. I see what you mean? Yeah. Can

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we get on this now? So we packed

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up so much stuff.

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Because they want your personal life out of

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the house. People wanna be able to walk

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into something very neutral and picture themselves in

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your house.

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So it was really

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shocking for me because the last 2 homes

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we have we have done they bought or

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whatever sold. We're done private.

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We didn't use a realtor tree. It didn't

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have this whole do ad and it's been

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many, many years. So wow.

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Anyways, that was chili 2 weeks

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and it's labor. Like, for me, it's physical.

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So it's it's hard on my body.

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Keith is few tired after work, and he's

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a bit stressed. But, man, he rose to

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the occasion. Once we realize these things have

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to be done, and this is what hap...

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We have to do moving forward,

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the then my husband has has his other

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mode as I like to call it. Then

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he goes into overdrive, and then When you

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need it, I'm greatly appreciative of it. So

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all of this is all about, you know,

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change and start. Over, and that's what today's

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lesson was all I was in. Now we're

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changing

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our work life our living locate mission or

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home,

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how we're gonna see family,

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our financial situation because we won't have an

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income coming in anymore. We'll just have our,

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you know, retirement income, which is significantly less,

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but manageable.

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And I feel confident in that because, as

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some of you know, I took my

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insurance licensed this past year.

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I wanted to

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learn

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more about things so I could manage... My

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own life, my own retirement, my own inheritance,

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my my own investments, that sort of thing.

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And it was it was wonderful. I I

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learned so much in it really changed things.

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And then once I became a licensed life

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insurance agent, things opened up on the company

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that I'm with on the website where I

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could do financial needs analysis. And it's just

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that. Fantastic

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to be able to put all your numbers

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in and find out if you... You know,

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if you're good or if you're not and

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where the shortfall falls are. And so you

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know, when we're starting making a fresh start,

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I had to feel very comfortable

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with those numbers. And so by the time

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I kind of got through... That this spring.

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We were at the point now Where was

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like, yeah, We're gonna we're gonna we're gonna

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pull the trigger and make the change. But

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that's my true change. Sometimes in people's lives,

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it's... Maybe you're changing your relationship. Maybe

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you

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want a new jump

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Maybe you need to create a whole new

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life because that... You just need to change

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the environment that you're in. And if you're

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not happy in your in your environment,

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change it. But make sure first

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that you've changed

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yourself.

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Because remember, wherever you go, there you are.

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So if you are catalyst for some of

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the things in your life that are working

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out. No matter how many changes you make

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in jobs, marriage location that you live, friends,

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you will still carry the damage with you

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and we'll create

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the chaos

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everywhere you go. So the goal here was

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starting over is the learning process, the healing

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process and accepting that life is about change.

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So what I just mentioned about, you know,

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where you are where you go there you

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are. That's a whole another podcast. So we're

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I'm not gonna go into that right now.

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This is just more of

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the fact that we have to start over,

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sometimes we choose like I am, and sometimes

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we don't.

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Now it's really interesting because 1 of my

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closest friends right now is going a huge

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change.

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And I'm gonna talk about as well, just

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the emotional,

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reaction in trauma that can happen with all

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of that. So my god children,

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they... They're Americans, but the parents are Canadians

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because my my friends have lived in the

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states pretty much their entire working life and

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had their children down there. However,

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his company got bought out

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and

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00:09:44,538 --> 00:09:46,540
half the people were like go, and he

271
00:09:46,540 --> 00:09:47,040
has

272
00:09:47,576 --> 00:09:48,850
kind of been forced to retire.

273
00:09:49,488 --> 00:09:50,921
And he's not in a position where he

274
00:09:50,921 --> 00:09:52,926
has any interest in getting another job they

275
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:54,592
too are like us where they were prepared

276
00:09:54,592 --> 00:09:56,337
for retirement and they're like, you know, it's

277
00:09:56,337 --> 00:09:58,162
a few years early, but we can make

278
00:09:58,162 --> 00:10:00,462
this happen. But it also meant they had

279
00:10:00,462 --> 00:10:02,624
60 days or... Yeah. To get out of

280
00:10:02,624 --> 00:10:04,533
the states. Once you're not employed with your

281
00:10:04,533 --> 00:10:06,044
green card or whatever it's called down there,

282
00:10:06,441 --> 00:10:08,668
your visas, they have to leave.

283
00:10:09,225 --> 00:10:10,379
She has been this

284
00:10:10,918 --> 00:10:11,418
huge

285
00:10:11,877 --> 00:10:14,594
packing up queen of organization, which is her

286
00:10:14,594 --> 00:10:16,272
strong soup. Thank Heavens because I'm gonna need

287
00:10:16,272 --> 00:10:16,772
her

288
00:10:17,151 --> 00:10:19,800
grown children are leaving the house. He husband

289
00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:21,788
is retiring, and move out of the home

290
00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:24,493
that they have lived in the entire time

291
00:10:24,493 --> 00:10:26,481
they've raised their children from was 19 years,

292
00:10:26,640 --> 00:10:27,118
20 years.

293
00:10:27,928 --> 00:10:29,837
All the friends she made down in that

294
00:10:29,837 --> 00:10:32,144
area. This is especially for women, I think

295
00:10:32,144 --> 00:10:33,814
more. We get attached to nesting,

296
00:10:34,292 --> 00:10:36,620
and we're we've raised our family and where

297
00:10:36,620 --> 00:10:37,658
we have lived our lives,

298
00:10:38,456 --> 00:10:40,052
and it was really hard for her because

299
00:10:40,052 --> 00:10:41,010
it wasn't a choice.

300
00:10:41,728 --> 00:10:43,299
The change had to have to,

301
00:10:44,053 --> 00:10:45,797
and she had to make it happen and

302
00:10:45,797 --> 00:10:48,175
deal with all the emotional fallout in a

303
00:10:48,175 --> 00:10:50,474
really short period of time. She had 1

304
00:10:50,474 --> 00:10:52,404
of the same experiences that I did. When

305
00:10:52,404 --> 00:10:53,605
we had to sell our a house that

306
00:10:53,764 --> 00:10:55,125
I built down the street 9 and a

307
00:10:55,125 --> 00:10:55,764
half years ago.

308
00:10:56,404 --> 00:10:57,684
We are in the same neighborhood that I...

309
00:10:57,845 --> 00:10:59,697
That we've and now for almost 20 years.

310
00:11:00,335 --> 00:11:01,932
I couldn't go back to the house. I'm,

311
00:11:02,251 --> 00:11:03,928
my friends actually bought it people I knew,

312
00:11:04,327 --> 00:11:05,684
and I couldn't go down there for almost

313
00:11:05,684 --> 00:11:07,280
a year because I was just burst into

314
00:11:07,280 --> 00:11:09,367
tears that house was my dream. I planned

315
00:11:09,367 --> 00:11:11,278
it and built it. I didn't build it

316
00:11:11,278 --> 00:11:13,189
myself, but I managed the building of it.

317
00:11:13,985 --> 00:11:14,485
And

318
00:11:15,577 --> 00:11:17,739
I worked long time to have that independence

319
00:11:17,739 --> 00:11:19,670
and to have that home. I

320
00:11:20,679 --> 00:11:21,156
struggled,

321
00:11:21,554 --> 00:11:22,371
my husband

322
00:11:22,825 --> 00:11:24,017
was like, I'm happy.

323
00:11:24,653 --> 00:11:27,220
And I would not believe that he took

324
00:11:27,220 --> 00:11:28,837
the move so easy

325
00:11:29,215 --> 00:11:30,891
and the same thing happened to my girlfriend.

326
00:11:31,849 --> 00:11:33,938
Her family is like, yes. So house we're

327
00:11:33,938 --> 00:11:35,234
going out, and she

328
00:11:35,768 --> 00:11:37,780
is dealing with her emotional

329
00:11:38,315 --> 00:11:40,623
trauma, but also getting no support from the

330
00:11:40,623 --> 00:11:43,192
family because they just really don't care. Though

331
00:11:43,192 --> 00:11:43,272
like,

332
00:11:44,470 --> 00:11:45,908
I wonder if that's a guy thing. I'm

333
00:11:45,908 --> 00:11:49,456
not really sure, but it is... True broad

334
00:11:49,512 --> 00:11:51,103
stroke, you know, when you talk about things

335
00:11:51,103 --> 00:11:53,249
about the difference between men and women and

336
00:11:53,329 --> 00:11:54,044
Mars and Venus.

337
00:11:54,601 --> 00:11:56,485
Women tend to be the village. We are

338
00:11:56,764 --> 00:11:59,477
nest by nature. There's always the exception in

339
00:11:59,477 --> 00:12:01,973
the outline light liars, but

340
00:12:02,431 --> 00:12:05,065
by nature, in the past and threw throughout

341
00:12:05,065 --> 00:12:06,435
your history, women kept the home.

342
00:12:07,153 --> 00:12:09,646
And men went off and fought wars and

343
00:12:09,943 --> 00:12:12,415
hundreds for food and and managed the world.

344
00:12:13,452 --> 00:12:13,952
But

345
00:12:14,344 --> 00:12:15,061
wear nest.

346
00:12:15,937 --> 00:12:17,610
And her mess was being taken away.

347
00:12:18,248 --> 00:12:20,638
And I understand that. I was devastated when

348
00:12:20,797 --> 00:12:22,086
I had to leave my last home.

349
00:12:22,961 --> 00:12:25,347
I am not devastated leaving this home.

350
00:12:25,904 --> 00:12:28,504
It has served a purpose. It was a,

351
00:12:29,344 --> 00:12:30,782
but it is a lot of house and

352
00:12:30,782 --> 00:12:33,819
a ton of land that we physically cannot

353
00:12:33,819 --> 00:12:35,816
keep up with anymore. We want a maintenance

354
00:12:35,816 --> 00:12:38,224
free yard with with parking. Because we wanna

355
00:12:38,224 --> 00:12:40,766
be rv on the boat or traveling, just

356
00:12:40,766 --> 00:12:41,083
the deal.

357
00:12:41,798 --> 00:12:43,307
And, you know, we we have a dog

358
00:12:43,307 --> 00:12:45,054
and she comes with us and and that's

359
00:12:45,054 --> 00:12:46,502
the life that we like now. We don't...

360
00:12:46,901 --> 00:12:48,837
We used to spend weekends, just

361
00:12:49,215 --> 00:12:51,768
managing the yards and the gardens and then

362
00:12:51,768 --> 00:12:53,619
friends would drop in for caught tails, will

363
00:12:53,619 --> 00:12:56,096
there be a fire pit that night. Wonderful.

364
00:12:56,256 --> 00:12:57,855
I do not regret the last at 9

365
00:12:57,855 --> 00:13:00,092
years at all. But this phase I'm done

366
00:13:00,092 --> 00:13:00,252
with.

367
00:13:01,211 --> 00:13:02,110
So for

368
00:13:03,223 --> 00:13:03,723
for

369
00:13:04,339 --> 00:13:06,971
you, if you are struggling, reach out to

370
00:13:06,971 --> 00:13:09,125
people that can relate. Because if you have

371
00:13:09,125 --> 00:13:11,917
a spouse or children or parents or anyone

372
00:13:11,917 --> 00:13:14,318
that's not under standing your change, get yourself

373
00:13:14,318 --> 00:13:17,099
a little support. So so Tracy has me

374
00:13:17,099 --> 00:13:18,075
and us girlfriends

375
00:13:18,688 --> 00:13:19,959
to kind of hold her hand on this

376
00:13:19,959 --> 00:13:22,624
1 and her friends down in C were

377
00:13:22,843 --> 00:13:23,322
amazing.

378
00:13:23,722 --> 00:13:24,461
They literally

379
00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:27,498
prop her up emotionally during this whole process

380
00:13:27,557 --> 00:13:29,075
because, you know, they lived almost 6 hours

381
00:13:29,075 --> 00:13:31,506
away from us. So we're on Marco polo

382
00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:33,877
on our phones, but we're not physically there

383
00:13:33,877 --> 00:13:34,356
for her.

384
00:13:35,153 --> 00:13:37,148
So in this particular case,

385
00:13:38,105 --> 00:13:41,073
errors are ending, homes or changing, but maybe

386
00:13:41,073 --> 00:13:42,751
you are in a position where you need

387
00:13:42,751 --> 00:13:44,828
to end a relationship or you need to

388
00:13:44,828 --> 00:13:46,906
move like us, or you need to start

389
00:13:46,906 --> 00:13:49,074
a new job or a new career. Now,

390
00:13:49,392 --> 00:13:51,221
am I gonna use my life insurance as

391
00:13:51,221 --> 00:13:53,447
a career? I am not sure at this

392
00:13:53,447 --> 00:13:56,445
point, but I'm certainly leaving that option open

393
00:13:56,964 --> 00:13:59,601
Right now, our time is being absorbed with

394
00:13:59,601 --> 00:14:01,998
the move and the change in our lives

395
00:14:01,998 --> 00:14:03,756
until the end of the year. But in

396
00:14:03,756 --> 00:14:04,475
20 25,

397
00:14:05,049 --> 00:14:06,330
it's hard to say what I might feel

398
00:14:06,330 --> 00:14:07,610
like doing once I'm settled,

399
00:14:08,169 --> 00:14:10,250
and I'm not managing 2 homes, and I'm

400
00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:10,990
not managing,

401
00:14:13,062 --> 00:14:14,657
rentals, you, I've go ahead. The students in

402
00:14:14,657 --> 00:14:16,890
my home for many, many years, and it's

403
00:14:16,890 --> 00:14:17,369
just us.

404
00:14:18,086 --> 00:14:19,921
You know, who knows what the future might

405
00:14:19,921 --> 00:14:22,669
hold ice. And the biggest thing here is

406
00:14:22,967 --> 00:14:25,862
stay open and curious.

407
00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:28,976
I cannot stress that enough. The universe

408
00:14:29,354 --> 00:14:31,843
responds and the more curious you are the

409
00:14:31,843 --> 00:14:33,835
more questions will come up and the more

410
00:14:33,835 --> 00:14:35,609
you will learn, it is fascinating

411
00:14:36,384 --> 00:14:37,579
trek and road to be on.

412
00:14:38,217 --> 00:14:39,369
Sometimes we'll we're

413
00:14:39,908 --> 00:14:41,347
starting a new part of her life it

414
00:14:41,347 --> 00:14:43,824
looks so different that we don't even recognize

415
00:14:43,824 --> 00:14:45,423
it, and it's not even related to the

416
00:14:45,423 --> 00:14:46,462
life we lived before.

417
00:14:47,740 --> 00:14:48,220
We're new.

418
00:14:49,192 --> 00:14:51,665
You have the opportunity to be new every

419
00:14:51,665 --> 00:14:53,659
single day. Life is new.

420
00:14:54,297 --> 00:14:56,131
We are starting over folks,

421
00:14:56,690 --> 00:14:58,419
and that is not a bad thing.

422
00:14:59,419 --> 00:15:01,339
Sometimes it feels like we're starting from scratch.

423
00:15:01,579 --> 00:15:03,899
And that is not my case right now.

424
00:15:04,299 --> 00:15:06,539
I don't feel I'm starting from scratch, but

425
00:15:06,620 --> 00:15:08,307
I had been there in my life.

426
00:15:09,260 --> 00:15:09,736
I have.

427
00:15:11,722 --> 00:15:13,572
We often feel a sense of excitement

428
00:15:14,343 --> 00:15:16,586
about a beginning, but also made harbor, like,

429
00:15:16,666 --> 00:15:18,181
my girlfriend did a lot of dread.

430
00:15:19,298 --> 00:15:20,813
I do not have dread about the move.

431
00:15:21,053 --> 00:15:23,047
Like, at all. And a lot of times

432
00:15:23,047 --> 00:15:24,881
maybe you've been through changes more than once

433
00:15:24,881 --> 00:15:26,967
and your reaction is not again, not 1

434
00:15:26,967 --> 00:15:28,876
more time. I can't do it. I don't

435
00:15:28,876 --> 00:15:29,433
want to.

436
00:15:30,388 --> 00:15:32,935
If you can learn to accept because that

437
00:15:32,935 --> 00:15:34,621
reaction is totally understandable.

438
00:15:35,496 --> 00:15:35,996
But

439
00:15:36,372 --> 00:15:38,600
if you can accept it and move through

440
00:15:38,600 --> 00:15:41,704
it, you're going to become tired, frightened and

441
00:15:41,704 --> 00:15:42,204
uncertain

442
00:15:42,754 --> 00:15:45,075
And if it's gonna happen anyways, it's going

443
00:15:45,075 --> 00:15:47,794
to be very painful for you. If you

444
00:15:47,794 --> 00:15:49,315
can let go and it's a matter of

445
00:15:49,315 --> 00:15:52,538
really meditating and just being aware every day

446
00:15:52,595 --> 00:15:54,025
and just say the words out loud.

447
00:15:55,296 --> 00:15:56,670
I let this go

448
00:15:57,680 --> 00:15:58,792
and keep moving forward.

449
00:15:59,843 --> 00:16:01,360
I think you will find a lot of

450
00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:02,578
times, the

451
00:16:02,956 --> 00:16:04,472
emotional and spiritual help is there.

452
00:16:05,111 --> 00:16:06,308
But if you get caught up in all

453
00:16:06,308 --> 00:16:09,459
the negative emotions, it's just make things so

454
00:16:09,679 --> 00:16:10,179
much

455
00:16:10,639 --> 00:16:12,399
harder. So honor your feelings,

456
00:16:13,039 --> 00:16:15,199
and all your emotions do not ignore them

457
00:16:15,199 --> 00:16:17,335
do not dismiss them and do not block

458
00:16:17,455 --> 00:16:17,774
them up,

459
00:16:19,054 --> 00:16:20,595
but remember the lessons

460
00:16:21,774 --> 00:16:23,855
and clear the weight to your heart. That's

461
00:16:23,855 --> 00:16:25,867
what I'm saying. Just everyday brief. Say out

462
00:16:25,867 --> 00:16:26,106
loud.

463
00:16:27,062 --> 00:16:28,654
I let this go when I'm open,

464
00:16:29,291 --> 00:16:30,747
and then make your decision

465
00:16:31,202 --> 00:16:33,113
because it's time for a fresh start. It

466
00:16:33,113 --> 00:16:34,963
is for me if it is for you,

467
00:16:35,443 --> 00:16:37,360
I hope this helped today. Know that you're

468
00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:37,840
not alone,

469
00:16:39,039 --> 00:16:41,036
know there are better ways and easier ways

470
00:16:41,036 --> 00:16:42,075
to get through change.

471
00:16:42,967 --> 00:16:45,218
And from my heart to yours, I wish

472
00:16:45,354 --> 00:16:47,900
you all the success and luck in the

473
00:16:47,900 --> 00:16:49,491
world if you were going through a change

474
00:16:49,491 --> 00:16:49,810
right now.

475
00:16:50,865 --> 00:16:52,225
Have a great day everyone, and I'll catch

476
00:16:52,225 --> 00:16:53,184
you on the flip side.

477
00:16:54,304 --> 00:16:56,705
We really hope you enjoyed this episode of

478
00:16:56,705 --> 00:16:57,985
could wood, sugar.

479
00:16:58,464 --> 00:17:01,753
Stay connected with directly through living well with

480
00:17:01,753 --> 00:17:05,184
shell dot com and Instagram at living well

481
00:17:05,184 --> 00:17:07,432
with shell. If you would like to speak

482
00:17:07,432 --> 00:17:09,577
with us. Please send us an email through

483
00:17:09,577 --> 00:17:12,437
shelly at living well with shell dot com.

484
00:17:12,754 --> 00:17:15,058
And as always, thank you for pushing your

485
00:17:15,058 --> 00:17:15,558
mindset

486
00:17:15,949 --> 00:17:19,142
towards a better reality. This concludes the most

487
00:17:19,142 --> 00:17:22,175
thought provoking portion of your day. Thank you.

488
00:17:22,415 --> 00:17:23,133
And remember,

489
00:17:23,692 --> 00:17:26,091
willpower will only get you so far, if

490
00:17:26,091 --> 00:17:27,357
you don't have a plan.

491
00:17:30,046 --> 00:17:30,175
You