1 00:00:00,020 --> 00:00:04,940 The comedy4cast Network. Let's dog ear that for now. 2 00:00:07,080 --> 00:00:12,860 It's time once again for the Dog Days of Podcasting, a call for podcasters to 3 00:00:12,860 --> 00:00:16,000 try to put out a podcast every day in August. 4 00:00:16,060 --> 00:00:20,940 For more information, go to dogdaysofpodcasting.com. 5 00:00:21,160 --> 00:00:24,720 We always take this month to provide you with some interesting, 6 00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:27,480 yet totally useless, Odd News. 7 00:00:27,860 --> 00:00:32,820 And this year, to celebrate the platinum anniversary of comedy4cast, 8 00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:40,479 or PAC for short, we'll end each Dog Day episode with part of a classic comedy4cast episode. 9 00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:45,220 So, let's get started with Odd News PAC. 10 00:00:46,120 --> 00:00:50,860 It's another Friday, which means it's time for another Odd News PAC, 11 00:00:51,280 --> 00:00:53,240 hashtag Pizza Friday story. 12 00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:58,220 And if you live in the United States, this one may bring a tear to your eye. 13 00:00:58,340 --> 00:01:00,980 Or at least that's what the statistics tell us. 14 00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:06,240 That's because, according to a recent survey, over half of Americans have cried 15 00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:08,620 over pizza at least once. 16 00:01:08,860 --> 00:01:11,340 But it's pizza. That's a happy thing. 17 00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:15,020 Well, unless you're lactose intolerant, what goes on here? 18 00:01:15,260 --> 00:01:18,459 Let's break it down, or slice it up. 19 00:01:18,599 --> 00:01:23,040 The recent survey questioned 1,000 Americans on their love of pizza, 20 00:01:23,220 --> 00:01:25,400 and somehow they didn't survey me. 21 00:01:25,640 --> 00:01:31,200 Anyway, in a surprising find, 55% of respondents, that's 22 00:01:31,560 --> 00:01:38,140 over half, admitted they had cried over pizza for a variety of toppings. Reasons. 23 00:01:38,440 --> 00:01:42,040 I wonder if watching someone eat pizza with a knife and fork showed up on the 24 00:01:42,040 --> 00:01:43,860 list. Because it should. 25 00:01:44,620 --> 00:01:51,720 Nope, not there. But 16% admitted weeping over someone else eating their last slice. 26 00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:55,940 13% had cried over a pizza delivery order being incorrect. 27 00:01:56,300 --> 00:02:00,820 And 12% had cried over their favorite pizza restaurant closing down. 28 00:02:01,220 --> 00:02:05,960 Those are ridiculously understandable reasons for sobbing. 29 00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:11,040 But then things start to get a little weird with these particular survey respondents. 30 00:02:11,500 --> 00:02:18,919 Almost everyone questioned, 97% said that they would go to extreme lengths to get pizza. 31 00:02:19,120 --> 00:02:24,360 It doesn't say exactly what all these people would do, but we do know that at 32 00:02:24,360 --> 00:02:29,100 some point, 13% of them had ignored work to go get a slice. 33 00:02:29,419 --> 00:02:36,220 And another 13% had pretended to be someone else in order to get their hands on some pizza. 34 00:02:36,460 --> 00:02:40,220 Are you sure they weren't just surveying old sitcom plot lines? 35 00:02:40,580 --> 00:02:45,860 Then there's the 7% who claim they faked an emergency to get their hands on 36 00:02:45,860 --> 00:02:47,720 pizza. Yeah, you heard me right. 37 00:02:47,980 --> 00:02:51,000 They've started handing out pizza in emergency rooms. 38 00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:58,520 Look, the bottom line here is, hey, USA population, There's no need to be sad. 39 00:02:58,880 --> 00:03:03,340 There are over 74,000 pizza restaurants in this country. 40 00:03:03,740 --> 00:03:09,740 Over 78,000 if you count every Little Caesars twice. Pizza, pizza. So don't be sad. 41 00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:11,800 It's hashtag Pizza Friday. 42 00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:15,000 Now, I want you to stand up. 43 00:03:15,710 --> 00:03:22,050 Go outside and sprain an ankle so you can get some of that delicious free emergency room pizza. 44 00:03:22,990 --> 00:03:28,910 And now let's celebrate 20 years of comedy4cast with this classic clip. 45 00:03:29,230 --> 00:03:34,890 In this clip from November of 2008, I make some apologies for errors in previous 46 00:03:34,890 --> 00:03:36,410 comedy4cast episodes. 47 00:03:36,810 --> 00:03:43,430 Yeah, I was doing apology casts before they were a thing. Let's join me mid-retractions. 48 00:03:44,310 --> 00:03:49,890 In my episode entitled 101 Jobs for People Who Don't Like Numbers, 49 00:03:50,370 --> 00:03:53,990 one of the occupations I mentioned was hairstylists. 50 00:03:54,390 --> 00:04:00,310 At one point I said that hairdressing was something you should never put on a Caesar salad. 51 00:04:00,730 --> 00:04:06,770 That was so obviously wrong. What I meant to say was you need to be careful 52 00:04:06,770 --> 00:04:13,790 when you give someone a buzz cut because one's buzz does not grow back quickly. 53 00:04:14,270 --> 00:04:17,089 And I hear it's kind of painful. 54 00:04:17,990 --> 00:04:23,010 Also, in the episode that featured my field guide to poisonous plants, 55 00:04:23,230 --> 00:04:27,730 venomous snakes, and the switch to digital television, I mentioned that the 56 00:04:27,730 --> 00:04:30,430 eastern hognose snake was poisonous. 57 00:04:31,130 --> 00:04:38,250 That was wrong. It's actually the similar-looking cottonmouth moccasin that's venomous. 58 00:04:39,050 --> 00:04:43,950 I apologize to the hognose species and hope that it will consider this public 59 00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:47,770 retraction sufficient and will drop its lawsuit. 60 00:04:48,210 --> 00:04:54,270 I don't look forward to going to court over this one. I think the snakes have an inherent advantage. 61 00:04:54,950 --> 00:05:02,089 What else? Oh yes, in episode 37, I found out later it's actually pronounced water. 62 00:05:02,850 --> 00:05:07,210 Also, I didn't mean to say that the Enterprise should be hauling garbage. 63 00:05:07,210 --> 00:05:10,250 I meant to say it should be hauled away as... 64 00:05:11,670 --> 00:05:16,649 You know, some of these are just for me, folks. The important thing is that 65 00:05:16,649 --> 00:05:19,350 I'm not ashamed to admit it when I've made a mistake. 66 00:05:19,850 --> 00:05:23,529 Now, what's that old saying? If people didn't make mistakes, 67 00:05:23,970 --> 00:05:26,670 blooper reels would just be really short documentaries. 68 00:05:27,089 --> 00:05:29,050 Something like that. The thing 69 00:05:29,050 --> 00:05:32,750 is, you need to be big enough to admit it when you've made a mistake. 70 00:05:33,210 --> 00:05:37,630 If you're GM, you need to look at that Cadillac Escalade and say, 71 00:05:37,630 --> 00:05:42,890 whoops, my bad, sorry, we'll stop making those things right away. 72 00:05:43,050 --> 00:05:46,050 Which reminds me of another mistake I made. 73 00:05:46,210 --> 00:05:54,290 Way back in 2005, I predicted, right here on this show, that we'd all have flying cars by now. 74 00:05:54,710 --> 00:05:57,370 Once again, I was wrong. 75 00:05:58,450 --> 00:06:03,890 Sort of. You see, it turns out we can make flying cars, and they made one a 76 00:06:03,890 --> 00:06:10,029 few years ago, the very expensive, very exclusive Porsche Pondhopper. 77 00:06:10,570 --> 00:06:16,490 But when they ran some tests on this flying car, they realized that they had made a big mistake. 78 00:06:17,070 --> 00:06:23,950 Rich people didn't like it. It turns out they were upset that there was no coach 79 00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:29,150 section in the back, so they didn't have anyone to sit in front of and be all, 80 00:06:29,330 --> 00:06:31,750 oh, look at us, we're flying first class. 81 00:06:32,650 --> 00:06:37,570 And their kids apparently kept trying to get the GPS to give them directions to the Sky Mall. 82 00:06:38,010 --> 00:06:42,470 The point is, flying cars turned out to be a big mistake. 83 00:06:42,810 --> 00:06:46,210 Kind of like actually naming a color puce. 84 00:06:46,790 --> 00:06:52,670 What the car companies, and everyone else, needs to remember is that there is 85 00:06:52,670 --> 00:06:55,050 nothing wrong with acknowledging mistakes. 86 00:06:55,650 --> 00:06:59,710 Look at me. I acknowledge other people's mistakes all the time. 87 00:06:59,710 --> 00:07:01,790 And it doesn't bother me a bit. 88 00:07:02,110 --> 00:07:07,150 In fact, when I walk down the street, I see people point at me and say, 89 00:07:07,330 --> 00:07:10,550 there goes one sorry individual. 90 00:07:11,290 --> 00:07:12,750 Makes me kind of proud. 91 00:07:14,670 --> 00:07:17,770 That about wraps it up for today's Odd News Pack. 92 00:07:17,950 --> 00:07:21,610 But first, a shout out to the Comedy Forecast Patreon patrons, 93 00:07:21,990 --> 00:07:26,690 including our producer-level patrons, Paul Barry from the A Window to the Magic 94 00:07:26,690 --> 00:07:31,870 podcast, and Kirby Bartlett-Sloan from the 20-megabyte Doctor Who podcast. 95 00:07:32,390 --> 00:07:34,590 You too can support Comedy Forecast 96 00:07:34,590 --> 00:07:39,190 and get episodes before everyone else for as little as $2 a month. 97 00:07:39,350 --> 00:07:45,630 Just search for Comedy Forecast, all one word with the number four, on patreon.com. 98 00:07:46,310 --> 00:07:52,330 Script, voices, and original music by me, Clinton Alvord. Copyright 2025. 99 00:07:53,050 --> 00:07:57,110 All rights reserved. Talk to you again next time. But for now, 100 00:07:57,430 --> 00:08:00,230 that's it. We're done, done, done, done, done. Bye-bye. 101 00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:12,330 Music.