The comedy4cast network. Let's dog ear that for now.
This is the 2023 comedy4cast Podcast Spectacular, brought to you by the fantastic Patreon patrons.
Thank you! Why not join Darren, Stan, Zach, and the other amazing individuals
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This year's original 20-chapter story is called Big Shot. To hear it from the beginning,
go to comedy4cast.com/2023,
And remember, comedy4cast is all one word, with the number four.
Now, here's Chapter 16, Paying the Price.
Music.
Previously in our story, the mysterious stranger returned to the Venus Arms Hotel resolved
to finally locate Danny Hillcrest at all costs, but instead, the staff trapped him,
in the hotel's revolving door.
Let me out! I don't think so.
You'll just keep looking for Danny, and we can't let you find him.
The staff was convinced that the stranger meant to harm Danny,
but while they waited for the police to arrive, Danny came in through the back door of the hotel,
surprising Miss Falmacher.
Danny! You need to go! Run! First, I needingly have to give you this heavy box.
Ugh!
Copy paper? When I was out puttingly printing my scripts, I used some of the hotel's supply. How much?
All of it! I knew you wouldn't be happy if you found out, so I bought you more!
As our chapter begins, the Stranger is still trapped inside the revolving doors.
If you don't let me out, I can't give Danny what he has coming.
Oh, did he say something for me?
Danny rushes toward the revolving door.
Danny! Don't! Watch out, Hillcrest! He's reaching for something in his jacket!
Everyone flinches, expecting the worst.
But the stranger simply pulls out sheets of paper and slams them against the glass of the revolving door.
Xylophone!
Paper? What sort of a weapon is paper? What does it say, Jules?
Moi?
Your closest. Cautiously, the maître d' inches towards the door and inspects the text.
It is a contract.
On Danny! No, je suis désolé. I meant for Danny.
It is a contract for Danny to produce his movie script. My real name is Perry J. Oshmont.
I work with the Low Channel. I want to make Danny's rom-com movie. You do? Like, ditto.
Yes! I was using an alias so no one would recognize me. Well, you could have picked a better one.
But I need Danny to sign this right away. Don't just sit there, Cap! Let the man out!
Stop the door! Start the door! What am I? Some kind of doorman?
No, really. Am I? Right this way, Mr. Oshmont. You can use my office.
I hope you won't take that whole we-think-you're-a-hit-man thing too personally. Uh-huh.
Well, lead the way. I need witnesses for the contract, too. Come along, Danny.
Danny? No one has noticed that Danny Hillcrest has not said a word in several minutes.
Oh, I noticed. I certainly noticed. Like me, too. We just didn't want to jinx it by saying anything.
They want to make my movie?
Yes. Now come into the office so this nice man can go over the details with you.
They want to make my movie!
Oh, for goodness sake!
Cindy, Detective Haartte, will you help Frozen Boy into the office, please?
Here, Mr. Oshmont. You can sit behind my desk. Danny, you sit there.
But Danny is still in shock. His body is as stiff as a board.
Maybe if we angle him right, we can prop him in this chair like a two-by-four. Like whatever.
Close enough. Now, Danny, this contract allows me to produce your script.
In return, my production company will pay you the sum of $50,000.
Fifty thousand dollars? Ooh, that's a lot of money, Danny.
With that kind of cash, you can make a down payment on a house.
Anywhere. Even far away from Chasm Valley.
And we're only interested in developing pages 83 through 142.
We don't usually get TV movie scripts that are over 500 pages long.
Oh, I could increasingly make it longer.
No, no, that's fine.
Now, just sign here. Like, shouldn't Danny hire a lawyer first to like, read over the contract?
With what money? Don't worry, Cindy. Once I have $50,000, I can hire one. But like...
Here, Danny. Use this complimentary public access pen.
And I need two witnesses.
Why, Oshmont, what exactly did you do? Was it...murder? For the contract.
Miss Vollmacher? Certainly. Cindy? Like, whatever.
I'm not really sure that's two different signatures.
All right. I need to get moving on this production right away.
Oh boy, Hollywood! It'll be just like I pictured it. Skyscrapers and every kiss begins with K!
Oh, I'm sorry Danny, but my production company doesn't have the budget for that.
And I can't ask the Low Channel for more. All the cable channels are on pretty shaky ground these days.
Of course you are. You're all based in LA. What were you thinking?
They want something that will produce buzz for the channel. That's why we want to have this movie out for Arbor Day.
That's a year away!
I guess that might be enough time. No, I mean this Arbor Day.
We need to get in front of the cameras ASAP.
But I had an idea for speeding things up.
I'm thinking the movie could take place in Chasm Valley. What a wonderful idea!
I'll take that as a yes.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to have a long call with my team and Sid Ralston. Who?
Sid Ralston is the Senior VP of Creative Development.
Sid and I go way back. Then tomorrow morning, I'll be heading out first thing.
Let's get this thing done.
I can't believe it. They're going to shoot a movie right here in our town.
At last, people will finally hear about what happens here in Middling Fair.
That's never happened before.
Like, what about the podcast? Podcast?
Like, you know, Lenny's Basically Podcast Show.
No offense, dear, but no one listens to that.
Like, Nomad451 just sent you an instant message. But I don't think I can repeat it.
We should do something special for Mr. Oshmont.
And I think I know just the thing. What does Abby have in mind?
Maybe there'll be cake.
Mmm, cake.
For answers, and maybe even recipes, be sure to come back for Chapter 17, A Fitting Farewell.
Subscribe so you never miss an episode. Just go to comedy4cast. You'll find lots of ways
to add us, like Spotify, Stitcher, and TuneIn. In this episode, as The Stranger, Grant Johnson,
voicegranted.com, as the maitre d, Nathan Alvord,
as Abby Falmacher and Cindy, Bonnie Kenderdine.
And the narrator was played by Gary J. Chambers, garyjchambersvo.com.
Additional voices, as well as story and music by Clinton Alvord.
Copyright 2023, all rights reserved.
See you next time, but for now, that's it. We're done, done, done, done, done.
Music.