[{"start": 0.0, "end": 21.52, "text": "Music.", "newpara": true}, {"start": 21.515, "end": 27.285, "text": "Hey everybody, welcome to episode 366 of the Virtual Couch. I am your host Tony Overbay.", "confidence": 0.98, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Hey everybody, welcome to episode 366 of the Virtual Couch. I am your host Tony Overbay.", 21.52, 27.29, 0.9794909358024597]]}, {"start": 27.285, "end": 31.845, "text": "I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist and let's get to it today, although I am going", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist and let's get to it today, although I am going", 27.29, 31.85, 0.9794909358024597]]}, {"start": 31.845, "end": 37.005, "text": "to do a little bit of business. But today we have Dr. Jennifer Finless-Fyfe on for her", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["to do a little bit of business. But today we have Dr. Jennifer Finless-Fyfe on for her", 31.85, 37.01, 0.9794909358024597]]}, {"start": 37.005, "end": 41.165, "text": "fifth appearance on the Virtual Couch and I did a quick check and Jennifer has a couple", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["fifth appearance on the Virtual Couch and I did a quick check and Jennifer has a couple", 37.01, 41.17, 0.9794909358024597]]}, {"start": 41.165, "end": 45.765, "text": "of episodes that are in my top 10 downloads of all time, including, I did not realize,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["of episodes that are in my top 10 downloads of all time, including, I did not realize,", 41.17, 45.77, 0.9794909358024597]]}, {"start": 45.765, "end": 51.365, "text": "number one most downloaded episode which was from March 19th of 2018, so almost five years", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["number one most downloaded episode which was from March 19th of 2018, so almost five years", 45.77, 51.37, 1.0]]}, {"start": 51.365, "end": 55.825, "text": "ago to the day depending on when you listen to this episode. So, I highly recommend you", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["ago to the day depending on when you listen to this episode. So, I highly recommend you", 51.37, 55.83, 1.0]]}, {"start": 55.825, "end": 60.369, "text": "go back in the archives and listen to Jennifer's previous episodes, all four of them. But today.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["go back in the archives and listen to Jennifer's previous episodes, all four of them. But today.", 55.83, 60.37, 1.0]]}, {"start": 61.085, "end": 65.685, "text": "We cover a lot of topics and one of the things that I honest to goodness love about talking,", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["We cover a lot of topics and one of the things that I honest to goodness love about talking,", 61.09, 65.69, 1.0]]}, {"start": 66.14, "end": 71.725, "text": "with Jennifer is that she is of course a very well-known, well-respected, knowledgeable", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["with Jennifer is that she is of course a very well-known, well-respected, knowledgeable", 66.14, 71.73, 1.0]]}, {"start": 71.725, "end": 75.965, "text": "clinical psychologist and according to her website, she teaches couples and individuals", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["clinical psychologist and according to her website, she teaches couples and individuals", 71.73, 75.97, 1.0]]}, {"start": 75.965, "end": 80.325, "text": "how to strengthen their relationships, overcome relational and sexual roadblocks, and increase", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["how to strengthen their relationships, overcome relational and sexual roadblocks, and increase", 75.97, 80.33, 1.0]]}, {"start": 80.325, "end": 85.485, "text": "their capacity for intimacy, love, and sexual expression. But she also has an amazing podcast", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["their capacity for intimacy, love, and sexual expression. But she also has an amazing podcast", 80.33, 85.49, 1.0]]}, {"start": 85.485, "end": 90.845, "text": "called Room for Two and it is a subscription-based podcast and it is worth every penny. And I", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["called Room for Two and it is a subscription-based podcast and it is worth every penny. And I", 85.49, 90.85, 1.0]]}, {"start": 90.845, "end": 94.845, "text": "have no problem, I think I shared in the last episode and I do it again today or in this", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["have no problem, I think I shared in the last episode and I do it again today or in this", 90.85, 94.85, 1.0]]}, {"start": 94.845, "end": 100.465, "text": "episode that I absolutely listen to it and I believe it has helped me in my own couples", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["episode that I absolutely listen to it and I believe it has helped me in my own couples", 94.85, 100.47, 1.0]]}, {"start": 100.465, "end": 105.825, "text": "work because I really feel like there is no scarcity of help or knowledge if you are a", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["work because I really feel like there is no scarcity of help or knowledge if you are a", 100.47, 105.83, 1.0]]}, {"start": 105.825, "end": 110.345, "text": "mental health professional. So, we hopefully we're all looking for new information or things", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["mental health professional. So, we hopefully we're all looking for new information or things", 105.83, 110.35, 1.0]]}, {"start": 110.345, "end": 115.499, "text": "that can help us and help our clients. I mean, on that note, I feel like I would hope that", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that can help us and help our clients. I mean, on that note, I feel like I would hope that", 110.35, 115.5, 1.0]]}, {"start": 115.625, "end": 120.085, "text": "if you are working with a therapist or a coach that they are continuing to evolve and grow", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["if you are working with a therapist or a coach that they are continuing to evolve and grow", 115.63, 120.09, 1.0]]}, {"start": 120.085, "end": 126.225, "text": "and self-confront and really understand that if they know what they know, then what comes", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and self-confront and really understand that if they know what they know, then what comes", 120.09, 126.23, 1.0]]}, {"start": 126.225, "end": 130.945, "text": "along with that is an absolute awareness and admission that there are for sure things that", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["along with that is an absolute awareness and admission that there are for sure things that", 126.23, 130.95, 1.0]]}, {"start": 130.945, "end": 134.625, "text": "they are not aware of and that they don't know. So it only makes sense that if we're", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["they are not aware of and that they don't know. So it only makes sense that if we're", 130.95, 134.63, 1.0]]}, {"start": 134.625, "end": 140.145, "text": "asking our clients to sit with discomfort and grow and listen and learn and self-confront", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["asking our clients to sit with discomfort and grow and listen and learn and self-confront", 134.63, 140.15, 1.0]]}, {"start": 140.145, "end": 145.905, "text": "and study and just seek knowledge that we are willing to do the same. So Jennifer and", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and study and just seek knowledge that we are willing to do the same. So Jennifer and", 140.15, 145.91, 1.0]]}, {"start": 145.905, "end": 150.705, "text": "talk a little bit about that today too and I really enjoyed that.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["talk a little bit about that today too and I really enjoyed that.", 145.91, 150.71, 0.9253740906715393]]}, {"start": 149.375, "end": 154.585, "text": "And one of the things that I absolutely loved is Jennifer said that we could just jump right in", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["And one of the things that I absolutely loved is Jennifer said that we could just jump right in", 149.37, 154.58, 1.0]]}, {"start": 154.585, "end": 159.465, "text": "and share this from the beginning. But I had submitted what I would like to talk to with her", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and share this from the beginning. But I had submitted what I would like to talk to with her", 154.58, 159.46, 1.0]]}, {"start": 159.465, "end": 164.408, "text": "assistant, but she said that she really hadn't had a chance to dive into the topic that I had shared.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["assistant, but she said that she really hadn't had a chance to dive into the topic that I had shared.", 159.46, 164.41, 1.0]]}, {"start": 164.886, "end": 168.585, "text": "And when I initially set up the interview, this was a couple of months ago, I really felt", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And when I initially set up the interview, this was a couple of months ago, I really felt", 164.89, 168.58, 1.0]]}, {"start": 168.585, "end": 173.42, "text": "passionate about a topic that I wanted to share as well. And I had spent the morning just kind", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["passionate about a topic that I wanted to share as well. And I had spent the morning just kind", 168.58, 173.42, 1.0]]}, {"start": 173.785, "end": 178.105, "text": "of feeling like I'm not sure if I really want to go into that topic, but what if Jennifer spent a", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["of feeling like I'm not sure if I really want to go into that topic, but what if Jennifer spent a", 173.78, 178.1, 1.0]]}, {"start": 178.105, "end": 182.725, "text": "a lot of time preparing. And I had had clinical supervision with my associate, formerly known", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["a lot of time preparing. And I had had clinical supervision with my associate, formerly known", 178.1, 182.72, 1.0]]}, {"start": 182.725, "end": 186.365, "text": "as intern Nate Christensen. And it was fun because Nate and I just talked about even", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["as intern Nate Christensen. And it was fun because Nate and I just talked about even", 182.72, 186.36, 1.0]]}, {"start": 186.365, "end": 190.165, "text": "the concepts of, all right, it's okay if I just want to bring things up and just be in", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["the concepts of, all right, it's okay if I just want to bring things up and just be in", 186.36, 190.16, 1.0]]}, {"start": 190.165, "end": 194.224, "text": "the moment. And of course, I could change my mind in the last couple of months. So,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["the moment. And of course, I could change my mind in the last couple of months. So,", 190.16, 194.22, 1.0]]}, {"start": 194.685, "end": 199.565, "text": "I went into the interview just a little bit more wanting to just explore a lot of different", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I went into the interview just a little bit more wanting to just explore a lot of different", 194.68, 199.56, 1.0]]}, {"start": 199.565, "end": 203.765, "text": "topics. And she was absolutely down for that. And that's what made, I think, this interview", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["topics. And she was absolutely down for that. And that's what made, I think, this interview", 199.56, 203.76, 1.0]]}, {"start": 203.765, "end": 209.438, "text": "a lot of fun. And we talked about everything from ADHD, ADHD in relationships, we talked", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["a lot of fun. And we talked about everything from ADHD, ADHD in relationships, we talked", 203.76, 209.44, 1.0]]}, {"start": 209.485, "end": 212.685, "text": "about how as a therapist, and this is the thing that I was just thinking about so much", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["about how as a therapist, and this is the thing that I was just thinking about so much", 209.48, 212.68, 1.0]]}, {"start": 212.685, "end": 219.889, "text": "the morning that we had recorded, was how do you start with a couple that we know, that", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["the morning that we had recorded, was how do you start with a couple that we know, that", 212.68, 219.89, 1.0]]}, {"start": 220.205, "end": 225.125, "text": "they don't know, what they don't know, and they are coming to us because they really", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["they don't know, what they don't know, and they are coming to us because they really", 220.2, 225.12, 1.0]]}, {"start": 225.125, "end": 228.885, "text": "are struggling to communicate about a lot of different things, but we're trying to sell", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["are struggling to communicate about a lot of different things, but we're trying to sell", 225.12, 228.88, 1.0]]}, {"start": 228.885, "end": 233.465, "text": "them on this concepts of interdependence and differentiation and sitting with discomfort", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["them on this concepts of interdependence and differentiation and sitting with discomfort", 228.88, 233.46, 1.0]]}, {"start": 233.465, "end": 237.084, "text": "and what does that even look like to not need your partner to tell you that you're okay?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and what does that even look like to not need your partner to tell you that you're okay?", 233.46, 237.08, 1.0]]}, {"start": 237.865, "end": 244.685, "text": "And let me tell you, the topic that I had initially suggested that we do a podcast about, we did get to that.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["And let me tell you, the topic that I had initially suggested that we do a podcast about,", 237.86, 242.74, 1.0], ["we did get to that.", 242.74, 244.68, 1.0]]}, {"start": 244.685, "end": 250.385, "text": "And what that is, is I end up working with a lot of couples and I work with people who", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And what that is, is I end up working with a lot of couples and I work with people who", 244.68, 250.38, 1.0]]}, {"start": 250.385, "end": 255.25, "text": "will come to me and they maybe are listening to the Waking Up to Narcissism podcast or", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["will come to me and they maybe are listening to the Waking Up to Narcissism podcast or", 250.38, 255.25, 1.0]]}, {"start": 255.538, "end": 259.885, "text": "they've heard me talk about emotional immaturity or narcissistic traits or tendencies and maybe", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["they've heard me talk about emotional immaturity or narcissistic traits or tendencies and maybe", 255.54, 259.88, 1.0]]}, {"start": 259.885, "end": 263.925, "text": "my couples method using my four pillars of a connected conversation and why do they try", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["my couples method using my four pillars of a connected conversation and why do they try", 259.88, 263.92, 1.0]]}, {"start": 263.925, "end": 269.078, "text": "that at home and it doesn't quite work and is my husband the narcissist, am I the narcissist?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that at home and it doesn't quite work and is my husband the narcissist, am I the narcissist?", 263.92, 269.08, 1.0]]}, {"start": 269.425, "end": 273.565, "text": "So I get a lot of that. So then I end up working with people and we reframe it, we start talking", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So I get a lot of that. So then I end up working with people and we reframe it, we start talking", 269.42, 273.56, 1.0]]}, {"start": 273.565, "end": 277.909, "text": "about narcissistic personality disorders, a tiny percentage of the population, but I", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["about narcissistic personality disorders, a tiny percentage of the population, but I", 273.56, 277.91, 1.0]]}, {"start": 277.954, "end": 282.545, "text": "agree or I believe that we are all emotionally immature in a lot of different ways until", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["agree or I believe that we are all emotionally immature in a lot of different ways until", 277.95, 282.54, 1.0]]}, {"start": 282.545, "end": 287.605, "text": "we get the tools to learn how to communicate, we can self-confront. And so I work with,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["we get the tools to learn how to communicate, we can self-confront. And so I work with,", 282.54, 287.6, 1.0]]}, {"start": 287.605, "end": 290.905, "text": "I mean, for the most part, I end up working with a lot of couples, and then I'll end up", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["I mean, for the most part, I end up working with a lot of couples, and then I'll end up", 287.6, 290.9, 0.9510068893432617]]}, {"start": 290.905, "end": 292.025, "text": "at breaking off with the men.", "confidence": 0.89, "timestamps": [["at breaking off with the men.", 290.9, 292.02, 0.8908524513244629]]}, {"start": 292.925, "end": 301.099, "text": "And then I can have a wife that will say, I just want him to be honest. I just want him to be able to self confront. I want him to take ownership and accountability.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["And then I can have a wife that will say, I just want him to be honest. I just want him to be able to self confront. I want him to take ownership and accountability.", 292.92, 301.1, 1.0]]}, {"start": 301.657, "end": 313.351, "text": "But in reality, it is probably been a long period of time that is led up to the people coming to therapy or finding the right therapist or somebody that is offering the tools, the right tools.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["But in reality, it is probably been a long period of time that is led up to the people coming to therapy or finding the right therapist or somebody that is offering the tools, the right tools.", 301.66, 313.35, 1.0]]}, {"start": 313.693, "end": 325.954, "text": "So, in this scenario that I'm describing, then let's say that the man starts to wake up to his own emotional immaturity and he starts to do his best to take ownership, but it's still hard to sit with discomfort and it's hard not to fire back.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So, in this scenario that I'm describing, then let's say that the man starts to wake up to his own emotional immaturity and he starts to do his best to take ownership, but it's still hard to sit with discomfort and it's hard not to fire back.", 313.69, 325.95, 1.0]]}, {"start": 326.296, "end": 341.051, "text": "So, the wife at some point is saying, well, this is all I want, is I want him to do this, but then when he does it, then how can she, it's not just easy for her to say, oh, okay, it's been a week or two, so now I completely trust him, but if she doesn't, then he gets frustrated.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So, the wife at some point is saying, well, this is all I want, is I want him to do this, but then when he does it, then how can she, it's not just easy for her to say, oh, okay, it's been a week or two, so now I completely trust him, but if she doesn't, then he gets frustrated.", 326.3, 341.05, 1.0]]}, {"start": 341.456, "end": 350.809, "text": "And so I talked to Jennifer about at what point do you just say, you know, hey, let's lean in versus listening to your body and your body keeps the score.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And so I talked to Jennifer about at what point do you just say, you know, hey, let's lean in versus listening to your body and your body keeps the score.", 341.46, 350.81, 1.0]]}, {"start": 351.196, "end": 356.418, "text": "And when there's some maybe the trauma or the complex post-traumatic stress disorder of relationships.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And when there's some maybe the trauma or the complex post-traumatic stress disorder of relationships.", 351.2, 356.42, 1.0]]}, {"start": 356.724, "end": 363.595, "text": "So there's just a lot of factors in there. But when you're really trying to help someone become a better version of themselves, that's one thing.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So there's just a lot of factors in there.", 356.72, 358.51, 1.0], ["But when you're really trying to help someone become a better version of themselves, that's one thing.", 358.51, 363.59, 1.0]]}, {"start": 363.595, "end": 366.595, "text": "And then how do you communicate that effectively to a spouse?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And then how do you communicate that effectively to a spouse?", 363.59, 366.59, 1.0]]}, {"start": 366.595, "end": 371.83, "text": "And so we have a really good conversation around, she works a lot in this model of differentiation.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And so we have a really good conversation around,", 366.59, 369.07, 1.0], ["she works a lot in this model of differentiation.", 369.07, 371.83, 1.0]]}, {"start": 372.315, "end": 376.035, "text": "And then I talk openly about my four pillars of a connected conversation,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And then I talk openly about my four pillars", 372.31, 374.95, 1.0], ["of a connected conversation,", 374.95, 376.03, 1.0]]}, {"start": 376.035, "end": 378.05, "text": "which are based off of emotionally focused therapy.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["which are based off of emotionally focused therapy.", 376.03, 378.05, 1.0]]}, {"start": 378.475, "end": 382.191, "text": "And you will find that people will say that they are in a camp of one or the other.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And you will find that people will say", 378.47, 380.31, 1.0], ["that they are in a camp of one or the other.", 380.31, 382.19, 1.0]]}, {"start": 382.615, "end": 384.915, "text": "And I feel like they go together.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I feel like they go together.", 382.61, 384.91, 1.0]]}, {"start": 384.915, "end": 389.515, "text": "I feel like I am a huge fan of getting people to work on their own stuff and get to a point.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I feel like I am a huge fan of getting people", 384.91, 386.99, 1.0], ["to work on their own stuff and get to a point.", 387.51, 389.51, 1.0]]}, {"start": 390.113, "end": 394.785, "text": "Where they realize that they can't manage their own emotions through their other partner.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Where they realize that they can't manage their own emotions", 390.11, 393.95, 1.0], ["through their other partner.", 393.95, 394.79, 1.0]]}, {"start": 395.395, "end": 398.995, "text": "But they also need a tool to be able to communicate effectively", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["But they also need a tool to be able", 395.39, 397.95, 1.0], ["to communicate effectively", 397.95, 398.99, 1.0]]}, {"start": 398.995, "end": 401.315, "text": "because we have different expectations of marriage", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["because we have different expectations of marriage", 398.99, 401.31, 1.0]]}, {"start": 401.315, "end": 406.155, "text": "and we have different meanings of everything from words and situations, parenting, finances,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and we have different meanings of everything", 401.31, 403.35, 1.0], ["from words and situations, parenting, finances,", 403.35, 406.15, 1.0]]}, {"start": 406.155, "end": 406.938, "text": "from the way that we grow up.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["from the way that we grow up.", 406.15, 406.94, 1.0]]}, {"start": 407.355, "end": 411.638, "text": "So I just, I really enjoy the conversation that we have because we touch on a lot of those different areas.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So I just, I really enjoy the conversation that we have", 407.35, 409.95, 1.0], ["because we touch on a lot of those different areas.", 409.95, 411.64, 1.0]]}, {"start": 411.795, "end": 413.519, "text": "And as a matter of fact, it's pretty funny.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And as a matter of fact, it's pretty funny.", 411.79, 413.52, 1.0]]}, {"start": 413.795, "end": 418.443, "text": "One of my favorite things to do is just be real with Jennifer and get her to laugh.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["One of my favorite things to do", 413.79, 415.63, 1.0], ["is just be real with Jennifer and get her to laugh.", 415.63, 418.44, 1.0]]}, {"start": 418.915, "end": 427.095, "text": "And I have long since said that when I truly embraced that I myself am simply who I am, and I love what I do,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I have long since said that when I truly embraced", 418.91, 423.55, 1.0], ["that I myself am simply who I am, and I love what I do,", 423.55, 427.09, 1.0]]}, {"start": 427.095, "end": 428.553, "text": "and I love people, and I love humor,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and I love people, and I love humor,", 427.09, 428.55, 1.0]]}, {"start": 428.823, "end": 433.09, "text": "and I personally find it difficult to turn off the humor track that is inside of my own brain,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and I personally find it difficult", 428.82, 430.25, 1.0], ["to turn off the humor track that is inside of my own brain,", 430.25, 433.09, 1.0]]}, {"start": 433.175, "end": 437.635, "text": "and that was gonna be how I'm gonna show up as a therapist and as a podcaster as myself.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and that was gonna be how I'm gonna show up as a therapist", 433.17, 435.49, 1.0], ["and as a podcaster as myself.", 435.49, 437.63, 1.0]]}, {"start": 437.825, "end": 441.775, "text": "And if people don't want to work with me or listen to me, that is absolutely no problem.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And if people don't want to work with me or listen to me,", 437.83, 440.49, 1.0], ["that is absolutely no problem.", 440.49, 441.77, 1.0]]}, {"start": 441.775, "end": 444.559, "text": "I think on an interview recently, I was getting lovably worked up about this,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I think on an interview recently,", 441.77, 443.05, 1.0], ["I was getting lovably worked up about this,", 443.05, 444.56, 1.0]]}, {"start": 444.815, "end": 446.775, "text": "and I said something like, and if somebody wants to tell me", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and I said something like,", 444.81, 445.73, 1.0], ["and if somebody wants to tell me", 445.73, 446.77, 1.0]]}, {"start": 446.775, "end": 448.675, "text": "that they don't like the way that I podcast,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that they don't like the way that I podcast,", 446.77, 448.67, 1.0]]}, {"start": 448.675, "end": 452.615, "text": "or they think that I should do something different, or if they wanna tell me how I should do my podcast", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["or they think that I should do something different,", 448.67, 450.2, 1.0], ["or if they wanna tell me how I should do my podcast", 450.61, 452.61, 1.0]]}, {"start": 452.615, "end": 455.047, "text": "or my therapy or my life, well, they can go.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["or my therapy or my life, well, they can go.", 452.61, 455.05, 0.8971741795539856]]}, {"start": 455.623, "end": 458.433, "text": "They can go bless themselves, which I thought that sounded really nice.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["They can go bless themselves, which I thought that sounded really nice.", 455.62, 458.43, 1.0]]}, {"start": 458.433, "end": 463.073, "text": "And Jennifer laughs in this podcast, and I think we have some very real moments as human beings.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And Jennifer laughs in this podcast, and I think we have some very real moments as human beings.", 458.43, 463.07, 1.0]]}, {"start": 463.073, "end": 464.112, "text": "So that's a lot of fun.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So that's a lot of fun.", 463.07, 464.11, 1.0]]}, {"start": 464.517, "end": 467.873, "text": "Now, I'm going to do a little bit of business here, and I would love for you to just stay", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Now, I'm going to do a little bit of business here, and I would love for you to just stay", 464.52, 467.87, 1.0]]}, {"start": 467.873, "end": 471.633, "text": "present for about another minute, minute and a half, but I also am a podcast listener.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["present for about another minute, minute and a half, but I also am a podcast listener.", 467.87, 471.63, 1.0]]}, {"start": 471.633, "end": 475.633, "text": "So if you feel the need to fast forward, then I will not be offended because I really want", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So if you feel the need to fast forward, then I will not be offended because I really want", 471.63, 475.63, 1.0]]}, {"start": 475.633, "end": 476.841, "text": "you to hear the content today.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["you to hear the content today.", 475.63, 476.84, 1.0]]}, {"start": 477.354, "end": 483.233, "text": "But you can find more information about Jennifer at her website, finlayson-vife.com, and I'll", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But you can find more information about Jennifer at her website, finlayson-vife.com, and I'll", 477.35, 483.23, 1.0]]}, {"start": 483.233, "end": 486.873, "text": "have that in the show notes. And I highly recommend her podcast or courses. And on that", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["have that in the show notes. And I highly recommend her podcast or courses. And on that", 483.23, 486.87, 0.9835813641548157]]}, {"start": 486.873, "end": 490.493, "text": "note, here we go while I have you find the show notes on this episode where whether you're", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["note, here we go while I have you find the show notes on this episode where whether you're", 486.87, 490.49, 0.9835813641548157]]}, {"start": 490.493, "end": 494.161, "text": "listening on a podcast app or if you're watching on the Virtual Couch YouTube channel, there,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["listening on a podcast app or if you're watching on the Virtual Couch YouTube channel, there,", 490.49, 494.16, 0.9835813641548157]]}, {"start": 494.713, "end": 497.953, "text": "will be a link tree link. And if you're not familiar with that, I believe that it is something", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["will be a link tree link. And if you're not familiar with that, I believe that it is something", 494.71, 497.95, 0.9835813641548157]]}, {"start": 497.953, "end": 507.125, "text": "like LINKTR.EE slash virtual couch. And that will actually then take you to a an amazing", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["like LINKTR.EE slash virtual couch. And that will actually then take you to a an amazing", 497.95, 507.12, 0.9835813641548157]]}, {"start": 507.193, "end": 511.333, "text": "can go what amalgamation cornucopia of all the links that have everything to do with", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["can go what amalgamation cornucopia of all the links that have everything to do with", 507.19, 511.33, 0.9835813641548157]]}, {"start": 511.333, "end": 514.813, "text": "everything that I am doing. So if you go there I would highly recommend signing", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["everything that I am doing. So if you go there I would highly recommend signing", 511.33, 514.81, 1.0]]}, {"start": 514.813, "end": 518.213, "text": "up for my newsletter. Do that first and foremost and that will fill you in on a", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["up for my newsletter. Do that first and foremost and that will fill you in on a", 514.81, 518.21, 1.0]]}, {"start": 518.213, "end": 521.893, "text": "lot of different things as they come out. But I have an updated Magnetic Marriage", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["lot of different things as they come out. But I have an updated Magnetic Marriage", 518.21, 521.89, 1.0]]}, {"start": 521.893, "end": 529.653, "text": "standalone course that is coming out very very soon and I'm very excited about that. I have a Magnetic Marriage workshop that is available right now.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["standalone course that is coming out very very soon and I'm very excited", 521.89, 526.01, 1.0], ["about that. I have a Magnetic Marriage workshop that is available right now.", 526.01, 529.65, 1.0]]}, {"start": 529.653, "end": 533.573, "text": "It's 90 minutes, it's $19 and it gives you basically just a lot of information.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["It's 90 minutes, it's $19 and it gives you basically just a lot of information.", 529.65, 533.57, 1.0]]}, {"start": 534.14, "end": 540.413, "text": "On how to relationship. And then I have a new, brand new trailer for the very very", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["On how to relationship. And then I have a new, brand new trailer for the very very", 534.14, 540.41, 1.0]]}, {"start": 540.413, "end": 544.853, "text": "soon to be released true crime meets therapy podcast called murder on the couch with my", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["soon to be released true crime meets therapy podcast called murder on the couch with my", 540.41, 544.85, 1.0]]}, {"start": 544.853, "end": 550.011, "text": "daughter Sydney and please go watch that trailer it is literally going out as I hit publish", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["daughter Sydney and please go watch that trailer it is literally going out as I hit publish", 544.85, 550.01, 1.0]]}, {"start": 550.293, "end": 555.413, "text": "on this episode and she is hilarious and we've recorded some episodes and I'm excited about", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["on this episode and she is hilarious and we've recorded some episodes and I'm excited about", 550.29, 555.41, 1.0]]}, {"start": 555.413, "end": 560.013, "text": "this podcast I really am I also have a new podcast coming out based off of my best-selling", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["this podcast I really am I also have a new podcast coming out based off of my best-selling", 555.41, 560.01, 1.0]]}, {"start": 560.013, "end": 564.253, "text": "book he's a porn addict now what an expert in a former addict answer your questions with", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["book he's a porn addict now what an expert in a former addict answer your questions with", 560.01, 564.25, 1.0]]}, {"start": 564.352, "end": 567.933, "text": "my co-author Joshua Shea we've got a whole season in the bank there and we go into a", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["my co-author Joshua Shea we've got a whole season in the bank there and we go into a", 564.35, 567.93, 1.0]]}, {"start": 567.933, "end": 571.913, "text": "a lot of detail that I think is going to help people that are struggling to overcome pornography", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["a lot of detail that I think is going to help people that are struggling to overcome pornography", 567.93, 571.91, 1.0]]}, {"start": 571.913, "end": 576.453, "text": "as an unhealthy coping mechanism. And on that note, my online pornography recovery program,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["as an unhealthy coping mechanism. And on that note, my online pornography recovery program,", 571.91, 576.45, 1.0]]}, {"start": 576.453, "end": 581.33, "text": "The Path Back, is, it's amazing. I cannot say enough good things about that. And I have", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["The Path Back, is, it's amazing. I cannot say enough good things about that. And I have", 576.45, 581.33, 1.0]]}, {"start": 581.533, "end": 586.733, "text": "to be honest, compared to a lot of other courses, it is affordable. The weekly group calls are", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to be honest, compared to a lot of other courses, it is affordable. The weekly group calls are", 581.53, 586.73, 1.0]]}, {"start": 586.733, "end": 591.333, "text": "amazing. That's one of my highlights of the week. And then go check out the Waking Up", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["amazing. That's one of my highlights of the week. And then go check out the Waking Up", 586.73, 591.33, 1.0]]}, {"start": 591.333, "end": 595.893, "text": "to Narcissism podcast, because the numbers there are now on equal ground as the virtual", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to Narcissism podcast, because the numbers there are now on equal ground as the virtual", 591.33, 595.89, 1.0]]}, {"start": 595.893, "end": 601.171, "text": "couch and the feedback though is 10 to 1. I mean people really feeling seen and heard and understood.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["couch and the feedback though is 10 to 1. I mean people really feeling seen and heard and understood.", 595.89, 601.17, 1.0]]}, {"start": 601.649, "end": 605.813, "text": "And they ask questions. Boy do people ask questions. I have a private women's Facebook", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["And they ask questions. Boy do people ask questions. I have a private women's Facebook", 601.65, 605.81, 1.0]]}, {"start": 605.813, "end": 609.573, "text": "group for women that are in narcissistic or emotionally immature or abusive relationships", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["group for women that are in narcissistic or emotionally immature or abusive relationships", 605.81, 609.57, 1.0]]}, {"start": 609.573, "end": 616.453, "text": "that is thriving and that has led to a premium podcast on the Apple podcast app that is called", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that is thriving and that has led to a premium podcast on the Apple podcast app that is called", 609.57, 616.45, 1.0]]}, {"start": 616.453, "end": 621.493, "text": "Waking Up to Narcissism Questions and Answers because I have so many questions and it is a", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Waking Up to Narcissism Questions and Answers because I have so many questions and it is a", 616.45, 621.49, 1.0]]}, {"start": 621.493, "end": 626.613, "text": "population of people that are just dying for answers.", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["population of people that are just dying for answers.", 621.49, 626.61, 0.9431899189949036]]}, {"start": 625.388, "end": 630.798, "text": "And the proceeds from that podcast go to a non-profit to help women in these types of relationships.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And the proceeds from that podcast go to a non-profit to help women in these types of relationships.", 625.39, 630.8, 1.0]]}, {"start": 631.203, "end": 636.518, "text": "And then please go follow me on Instagram, TonyOverBay underscore LMFT. I might be opening", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And then please go follow me on Instagram, TonyOverBay underscore LMFT. I might be opening", 631.2, 636.52, 1.0]]}, {"start": 636.518, "end": 639.958, "text": "up a spot or two for some one-on-one coaching, so I would love for you to reach out to me if", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["up a spot or two for some one-on-one coaching, so I would love for you to reach out to me if", 636.52, 639.96, 1.0]]}, {"start": 639.958, "end": 644.517, "text": "you are interested. And then the last but not least, go find me on TikTok of all places.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["you are interested. And then the last but not least, go find me on TikTok of all places.", 639.96, 644.52, 1.0]]}, {"start": 644.838, "end": 649.558, "text": "I'm recording a lot of short therapy and mental health related clips, and I want to tell you that", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I'm recording a lot of short therapy and mental health related clips, and I want to tell you that", 644.84, 649.56, 1.0]]}, {"start": 649.558, "end": 654.285, "text": "I don't care about numbers. I've always said that. I just want to help. But then, if I'm being honest,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I don't care about numbers. I've always said that. I just want to help. But then, if I'm being honest,", 649.56, 654.28, 1.0]]}, {"start": 654.636, "end": 660.598, "text": "watching a TikTok video go to three quarters of a million views in the span of a couple of days", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["watching a TikTok video go to three quarters of a million views in the span of a couple of days", 654.64, 660.6, 1.0]]}, {"start": 660.982, "end": 666.358, "text": "with a thousand comments of people feeling seen and heard and validated. It is absolutely just", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["with a thousand comments of people feeling seen and heard and validated. It is absolutely just", 660.98, 666.36, 1.0]]}, {"start": 666.358, "end": 670.278, "text": "wild. It really is. It just makes you want to create more because you just want to help more.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["wild. It really is. It just makes you want to create more because you just want to help more.", 666.36, 670.28, 1.0]]}, {"start": 670.278, "end": 674.198, "text": "And I typically don't go into all of this detail, but I know Jennifer brings out the masses. This", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I typically don't go into all of this detail, but I know Jennifer brings out the masses. This", 670.28, 674.2, 1.0]]}, {"start": 674.198, "end": 679.318, "text": "is an incredible interview with her. I'm grateful for any new listeners that are here. You are in", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["is an incredible interview with her. I'm grateful for any new listeners that are here. You are in", 674.2, 679.32, 1.0]]}, {"start": 679.318, "end": 684.244, "text": "for a treat. So with that said, let's get to my interview with the virtual couch favorite,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["for a treat. So with that said, let's get to my interview with the virtual couch favorite,", 679.32, 684.24, 0.976263701915741]]}, {"start": 684.622, "end": 685.798, "text": "Dr. Jennifer Finlayson.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["Dr. Jennifer Finlayson.", 684.62, 685.8, 0.976263701915741]]}, {"start": 686.64, "end": 692.56, "text": "Music.", "newpara": true}, {"start": 693.931, "end": 697.798, "text": "Okay, no, that's good. So, welcome, Jennifer. I think this is maybe your fifth time on the couch,", "confidence": 0.98, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Okay, no, that's good. So, welcome, Jennifer. I think this is maybe your fifth time on the couch,", 693.93, 697.8, 0.976263701915741]]}, {"start": 697.798, "end": 702.598, "text": "the virtual couch. Could be. So, welcome back. Thank you. All right. Let me just close a couple", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["the virtual couch. Could be. So, welcome back. Thank you. All right. Let me just close a couple", 697.8, 702.6, 0.976263701915741]]}, {"start": 702.598, "end": 707.878, "text": "things really fast. Can you talk? Well, you know what I wonder as well? And I was even gonna,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["things really fast. Can you talk? Well, you know what I wonder as well? And I was even gonna,", 702.6, 707.88, 0.976263701915741]]}, {"start": 707.878, "end": 711.318, "text": "When I was thinking about the things, I would just love to know if you have thoughts on,", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["When I was thinking about the things, I would just love to know if you have thoughts on,", 707.88, 711.32, 0.9918600916862488]]}, {"start": 711.449, "end": 716.77, "text": "and you may not, but ADHD in relationships. And I'm very open about my ADHD. And that's", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["and you may not, but ADHD in relationships. And I'm very open about my ADHD. And that's", 711.45, 716.77, 0.9918600916862488]]}, {"start": 717.058, "end": 721.398, "text": "taken me down this path of where I wonder if having 900 tabs open does anything,", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["taken me down this path of where I wonder if having 900 tabs open does anything,", 717.06, 721.4, 0.9918600916862488]]}, {"start": 721.958, "end": 727.558, "text": "as far as the bandwidth of a podcast. I don't do you have much experience with ADHD in relationships", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["as far as the bandwidth of a podcast. I don't do you have much experience with ADHD in relationships", 721.96, 727.56, 0.9918600916862488]]}, {"start": 727.558, "end": 731.878, "text": "and when coaching or therapy? Actually, because like everybody in my family has a little bit.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["and when coaching or therapy? Actually, because like everybody in my family has a little bit.", 727.56, 731.88, 0.9918600916862488]]}, {"start": 732.073, "end": 738.006, "text": "It. Okay. Okay. Although I don't know if I think of myself as as an expert on it,", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["It. Okay. Okay. Although I don't know if I think of myself as as an expert on it,", 732.07, 738.01, 0.948354184627533]]}, {"start": 738.195, "end": 742.198, "text": "though. Yeah. It's certainly a topic I'd be happy to talk about. I just started", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["though. Yeah. It's certainly a topic I'd be happy to talk about. I just started", 738.19, 742.2, 0.948354184627533]]}, {"start": 742.198, "end": 746.297, "text": "doing a little bit of research on it because I notice it more the more that I...", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["doing a little bit of research on it", 742.2, 743.64, 0.9697697758674622], ["because I notice it more the more that I...", 743.64, 746.3, 0.8842212557792664]]}, {"start": 746.918, "end": 750.96, "text": "I do a little parallel processing and understanding what mine looks like in my relationship because", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["I do a little parallel processing and understanding what mine looks like in my relationship because", 746.92, 750.96, 0.917607307434082]]}, {"start": 751.008, "end": 755.088, "text": "there's rejection sensitivity and there's impulsivity and some of those things that can be.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["there's rejection sensitivity and there's impulsivity and some of those things that can be.", 751.01, 755.09, 0.917607307434082]]}, {"start": 756.048, "end": 758.608, "text": "Play a role. So, all right, maybe that's our sixth episode.", "confidence": 0.92, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Play a role. So, all right, maybe that's our sixth episode.", 756.05, 758.61, 0.917607307434082]]}, {"start": 759.116, "end": 761.52, "text": "Yeah. I think it will. I think it will be better. Yeah.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["Yeah.", 759.12, 758.82, 0.917607307434082], ["I think it will. I think it will be better.", 759.25, 761.52, 0.917607307434082], ["Yeah.", 761.74, 761.52, 0.917607307434082]]}, {"start": 761.968, "end": 769.248, "text": "Yeah. Okay. Because often ADHD people marry someone who's more organized and, you know, or more creative,", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["Yeah. Okay.", 761.97, 762.47, 0.917607307434082], ["Because often ADHD people marry someone who's more organized and, you know, or more creative,", 762.69, 769.25, 0.917607307434082]]}, {"start": 769.37, "end": 773.808, "text": "innovative people or they're in that sort of expansive and then they kind of marry someone", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["innovative people or they're in that sort of expansive and then they kind of marry someone", 769.37, 773.81, 0.917607307434082]]}, {"start": 773.808, "end": 778.669, "text": "that's the structure and so then there's that tension that can get played out even though.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that's the structure and so then there's that tension that can get played out even though.", 773.81, 778.67, 1.0]]}, {"start": 779.248, "end": 784.608, "text": "They both kind of wanted a little bit of what the other had but it can play out in conflict.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["They both kind of wanted a little bit of what the other had but it can play out in conflict.", 779.25, 784.61, 1.0]]}, {"start": 784.608, "end": 790.848, "text": "Petey It's like, okay, because first of all, my first thought was, okay, I have seen this organization that my wife has and it does look", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Petey It's like, okay, because first of all,", 784.61, 786.71, 1.0], ["my first thought was, okay, I have seen this organization that my wife has and it does look", 787.01, 790.85, 1.0]]}, {"start": 790.912, "end": 795.665, "text": "fascinating. I mean, it intrigues me but there was that there's a book by Hallowell and Rattay", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["fascinating. I mean, it intrigues me but there was that there's a book by Hallowell and Rattay", 790.91, 795.67, 1.0]]}, {"start": 795.89, "end": 801.248, "text": "called ADHD 2.0 that I now refer to as scripture. It's really, it's incredible but there's one part", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["called ADHD 2.0 that I now refer to as scripture. It's really, it's incredible but there's one part", 795.89, 801.25, 1.0]]}, {"start": 801.248, "end": 805.064, "text": "where I will say this then we can move on but they lay out this concept where", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["where I will say this then we can move on but they lay out this concept where", 801.25, 805.06, 1.0]]}, {"start": 805.288, "end": 809.048, "text": "apparently non ADHD people when they're they almost these switches where when", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["apparently non ADHD people when they're they almost these switches where when", 805.29, 809.05, 1.0]]}, {"start": 809.259, "end": 813.408, "text": "they're doing their thinking switch is also down and when the ADHD person is", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["they're doing their thinking switch is also down and when the ADHD person is", 809.26, 813.41, 1.0]]}, {"start": 813.408, "end": 821.248, "text": "doing their thinking switch is still going thinking thinking yeah and that one so then when I see something more novel then I'm gonna go do that and then", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["doing their thinking switch is still going thinking thinking yeah and that", 813.41, 817.65, 1.0], ["one so then when I see something more novel then I'm gonna go do that and then", 817.65, 821.25, 1.0]]}, {"start": 821.248, "end": 825.022, "text": "when somebody says why don't yeah and that one resonated to me so much because", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["when somebody says why don't yeah and that one resonated to me so much because", 821.25, 825.02, 1.0]]}, {"start": 825.168, "end": 829.368, "text": "well of course I'm gonna go do something else if it's really cool but then if my", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["well of course I'm gonna go do something else if it's really cool but then if my", 825.17, 829.37, 1.0]]}, {"start": 829.368, "end": 832.528, "text": "wife saying, well, why don't you finish what you were doing? Then I don't have a", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["wife saying, well, why don't you finish what you were doing? Then I don't have a", 829.37, 832.53, 0.9933042526245117]]}, {"start": 832.528, "end": 835.528, "text": "good answer for that. Well, because I didn't because something else came up.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["good answer for that. Well, because I didn't because something else came up.", 832.53, 835.53, 0.9933042526245117]]}, {"start": 836.086, "end": 845.168, "text": "But then being aware of that's been nice because then I have to build in that pause. Yeah, it's an interesting concept. I'll say this", "confidence": 0.99, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["But then being aware of that's been nice because then I have to", 836.09, 839.05, 0.9933042526245117], ["build in that pause. Yeah, it's an interesting concept. I'll say this", 839.27, 845.17, 0.9933042526245117]]}, {"start": 845.168, "end": 850.048, "text": "then we can move on to what we're talking about. I have a sister-in-law, we used to work", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["then we can move on to what we're talking about. I have a sister-in-law, we used to work", 845.17, 850.05, 0.9933042526245117]]}, {"start": 850.048, "end": 854.248, "text": "together back when I was working for my brother's company, the two of us were", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["together back when I was working for my brother's company, the two of us were", 850.05, 854.25, 0.9933042526245117]]}, {"start": 854.248, "end": 859.208, "text": "working for him in the summer between school semesters and so on. And she's", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["working for him in the summer between school semesters and so on. And she's", 854.25, 859.21, 0.9933042526245117]]}, {"start": 859.208, "end": 864.408, "text": "just one of these people that's like organized on top of things. She just, she just has a good,", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["just one of these people that's like organized on top of things. She just, she just has a good,", 859.21, 864.41, 0.9312088489532471]]}, {"start": 864.408, "end": 869.128, "text": "and so we would be doing parallel things, exact same thing, which was lots of just clerical,", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["and so we would be doing parallel things, exact same thing, which was lots of just clerical,", 864.41, 869.13, 0.9312088489532471]]}, {"start": 869.128, "end": 871.482, "text": "like stamping and organizing and...", "confidence": 0.72, "timestamps": [["like stamping and organizing and...", 869.13, 871.48, 0.7173154354095459]]}, {"start": 872.257, "end": 885.107, "text": "And she was just so much faster at the me and I'd be like just trying so hard to keep up and I would have to like make my mind stay on the activity because my mind would go to other things, which is a part of who I am.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["And she was just so much faster at the me and I'd be like just trying so hard to keep up and I would have to like make my mind stay on the activity because my mind would go to other things, which is a part of who I am.", 872.26, 885.11, 1.0]]}, {"start": 885.107, "end": 896.95, "text": "Right. I was like figuring out ideas and things, but it would slow me down. And so I'd be like, what is the matter with me? Why am I so much? Why is she able to be so efficient? So on task at all times?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Right. I was like figuring out ideas and things, but it would slow me down. And so I'd be like, what is the matter with me? Why am I so much? Why is she able to be so efficient? So on task at all times?", 885.11, 896.95, 1.0]]}, {"start": 897.107, "end": 899.669, "text": "It's just not really the way my brain worked.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["It's just not really the way my brain worked.", 897.11, 899.67, 0.991967499256134]]}, {"start": 900.107, "end": 904.314, "text": "Yeah, I like it because that would kind of speak to even almost this spectrum concept", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["Yeah, I like it because that would kind of speak", 900.11, 902.35, 0.991967499256134], ["to even almost this spectrum concept", 902.35, 904.31, 0.991967499256134]]}, {"start": 904.427, "end": 908.047, "text": "because if you're a little bit off and if I'm just, I need to make jokes,", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["because if you're a little bit off", 904.43, 905.91, 0.991967499256134], ["and if I'm just, I need to make jokes,", 905.91, 908.05, 0.991967499256134]]}, {"start": 908.047, "end": 911.993, "text": "I need to go get water, I need to find something else to do and come back, I'll do.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["I need to go get water,", 908.05, 909.35, 0.991967499256134], ["I need to find something else to do and come back, I'll do.", 909.35, 911.99, 0.991967499256134]]}, {"start": 912.107, "end": 914.467, "text": "And then they also- The people in my family are much more so,", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["And then they also-", 912.11, 912.95, 0.991967499256134], ["The people in my family are much more so,", 912.95, 914.47, 0.991967499256134]]}, {"start": 914.467, "end": 916.62, "text": "like I look like the organized one. You do, okay.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["like I look like the organized one.", 914.47, 916.03, 0.991967499256134], ["You do, okay.", 916.03, 916.62, 0.991967499256134]]}, {"start": 917.088, "end": 919.347, "text": "How fun is that, right? I mean that, yeah.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["How fun is that, right?", 917.09, 918.51, 0.991967499256134], ["I mean that, yeah.", 918.51, 919.35, 0.991967499256134]]}, {"start": 919.347, "end": 922.246, "text": "Well, I just look like the one who's more on task anyway.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["Well, I just look like the one who's more on task anyway.", 919.35, 922.25, 0.991967499256134]]}, {"start": 922.347, "end": 929.259, "text": "And so, anyway, it's interesting because I love a lot of people that are not particularly,", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["And so, anyway, it's interesting", 922.35, 925.39, 0.991967499256134], ["because I love a lot of people that are not particularly,", 925.39, 929.26, 0.9226130247116089]]}, {"start": 929.787, "end": 932.247, "text": "orderly in their way of thinking and doing things.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["orderly in their way of thinking and doing things.", 929.79, 932.25, 0.9226130247116089]]}, {"start": 932.941, "end": 935.669, "text": "And there's a lot of gifts that come with it. And then things that are,", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["And there's a lot of gifts that come with it.", 932.94, 934.53, 0.9226130247116089], ["And then things that are,", 934.53, 935.67, 0.9226130247116089]]}, {"start": 936.507, "end": 942.727, "text": "my son right now is on his line here, but he forgot his wallet, didn't remember his passport.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["my son right now is on his line here,", 936.51, 939.43, 0.9226130247116089], ["but he forgot his wallet, didn't remember his passport.", 939.43, 942.73, 0.9226130247116089]]}, {"start": 943.707, "end": 949.047, "text": "I don't wanna talk about him. But it's a little bit like, wow, you know?", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["I don't wanna talk about him.", 943.71, 946.03, 0.9226130247116089], ["But it's a little bit like, wow, you know?", 946.03, 949.05, 0.9226130247116089]]}, {"start": 950.587, "end": 955.007, "text": "No, that's not easy. So that's the case. Okay, well, okay, I think we even started with this too,", "confidence": 0.95, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["No, that's not easy.", 950.59, 951.48, 0.9226130247116089], ["So that's the case.", 951.83, 952.67, 0.9226130247116089], ["Okay, well, okay, I think we even started with this too,", 952.67, 955.01, 1.0]]}, {"start": 955.007, "end": 959.027, "text": "was I love your honesty about not being 100% sure what we were gonna talk about today.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["was I love your honesty about not being 100% sure", 955.01, 958.03, 1.0], ["what we were gonna talk about today.", 958.03, 959.03, 1.0]]}, {"start": 959.027, "end": 963.767, "text": "And then I love it because I had emailed Christy a month ago and said, I wanna talk about this.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And then I love it because I had emailed Christy", 959.03, 961.64, 1.0], ["a month ago and said, I wanna talk about this.", 961.98, 963.77, 1.0]]}, {"start": 963.767, "end": 967.887, "text": "And I kind of forgot about that, which maybe is part of this ADHD thing we're talking about.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I kind of forgot about that,", 963.77, 964.97, 1.0], ["which maybe is part of this ADHD thing we're talking about.", 964.97, 967.89, 1.0]]}, {"start": 967.887, "end": 970.447, "text": "And so then I felt like, oh, I need to let her know.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And so then I felt like, oh, I need to let her know.", 967.89, 970.45, 1.0]]}, {"start": 970.447, "end": 973.505, "text": "So I sent some stuff over this morning. So I do have some thoughts,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So I sent some stuff over this morning.", 970.45, 972.25, 1.0], ["So I do have some thoughts,", 972.25, 973.51, 1.0]]}, {"start": 974.189, "end": 978.582, "text": "but staying on this note a little bit too, I feel like maybe that the way that ADHD does show up", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["but staying on this note a little bit too,", 974.19, 975.73, 1.0], ["I feel like maybe that the way that ADHD does show up", 975.73, 978.58, 1.0]]}, {"start": 978.707, "end": 980.727, "text": "is it does bring a lot of discomfort.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["is it does bring a lot of discomfort.", 978.71, 980.73, 1.0]]}, {"start": 980.727, "end": 984.727, "text": "And I really have had to recognize, and lately I'm on this kick on the virtual couch", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I really have had to recognize,", 980.73, 982.63, 1.0], ["and lately I'm on this kick on the virtual couch", 982.75, 984.73, 1.0]]}, {"start": 984.727, "end": 986.64, "text": "talking about what we do with our discomfort.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["talking about what we do with our discomfort.", 984.73, 986.64, 1.0]]}, {"start": 986.955, "end": 991.609, "text": "And so I think that at times I want to then quickly turn to get that dopamine hit of novelty", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And so I think that at times I want to then quickly turn", 986.95, 989.81, 1.0], ["to get that dopamine hit of novelty", 989.81, 991.61, 1.0]]}, {"start": 991.967, "end": 994.327, "text": "instead of sit with feelings or discomfort.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["instead of sit with feelings or discomfort.", 991.97, 994.33, 1.0]]}, {"start": 994.467, "end": 999.567, "text": "And then I'm watching that in my couple's situations where even if they're using a really healthy framework", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And then I'm watching that in my couple's situations", 994.47, 997.01, 1.0], ["where even if they're using a really healthy framework", 997.01, 999.57, 1.0]]}, {"start": 999.667, "end": 1001.655, "text": "to communicate, it's still gonna be uncomfortable.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to communicate, it's still gonna be uncomfortable.", 999.67, 1001.66, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1001.767, "end": 1007.727, "text": "And then I feel like ADHD person is really, really good at distracting or saying,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And then I feel like ADHD person is really, really good", 1001.77, 1005.89, 1.0], ["at distracting or saying,", 1006.04, 1007.73, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1007.727, "end": 1011.999, "text": "but you don't understand to get out of that discomfort because by nature that's what we do,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["but you don't understand to get out of that discomfort", 1007.73, 1009.79, 1.0], ["because by nature that's what we do,", 1009.79, 1012.0, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1012.476, "end": 1015.507, "text": "because if we're doing something and that thinking switch keeps coming up,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["because if we're doing something", 1012.48, 1013.91, 1.0], ["and that thinking switch keeps coming up,", 1014.14, 1015.51, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1015.507, "end": 1017.058, "text": "we're used to following that.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["we're used to following that.", 1015.51, 1017.06, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1017.427, "end": 1020.137, "text": "So I don't know. Yeah, can I just give another idea about that? Yeah.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So I don't know.", 1017.43, 1018.27, 1.0], ["Yeah, can I just give another idea about that?", 1018.27, 1019.83, 1.0], ["Yeah.", 1019.83, 1020.14, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1020.827, "end": 1026.867, "text": "Human beings are always wrestling with anxiety and our ability to stay present", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Human beings are always wrestling with anxiety", 1020.83, 1025.07, 1.0], ["and our ability to stay present", 1025.07, 1026.87, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1026.867, "end": 1031.129, "text": "and be living life within the reality of life.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and be living life within the reality of life.", 1026.87, 1031.13, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1031.627, "end": 1033.046, "text": "So that's a human challenge.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So that's a human challenge.", 1031.63, 1033.05, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1033.667, "end": 1037.627, "text": "People that are more impulsive or ADHD are gonna bounce quickly to a new idea,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["People that are more impulsive or ADHD", 1033.67, 1035.67, 1.0], ["are gonna bounce quickly to a new idea,", 1035.67, 1037.63, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1037.627, "end": 1040.947, "text": "they bounce away perhaps. Yeah. Yeah.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["they bounce away perhaps.", 1037.63, 1038.95, 1.0], ["Yeah.", 1038.95, 1039.95, 0.8457403779029846], ["Yeah.", 1039.95, 1040.95, 0.8457403779029846]]}, {"start": 1041.463, "end": 1045.707, "text": "They move into activity. somebody who's more organized or...", "confidence": 0.81, "timestamps": [["They move into activity.", 1041.46, 1041.95, 0.8457403779029846], ["somebody who's more organized or...", 1041.95, 1045.71, 0.7837150692939758]]}, {"start": 1044.857, "end": 1049.967, "text": "Bruton eyes may well handle it by moving into routine by moving into so that it's not necessarily.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["Bruton eyes may well handle it by moving into routine by moving into so that it's not necessarily.", 1044.86, 1049.97, 0.8968777656555176]]}, {"start": 1051.231, "end": 1055.567, "text": "More that ADHD people are less able to be present,", "confidence": 0.9, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["More that ADHD people are less able to be present,", 1051.23, 1055.57, 0.8968777656555176]]}, {"start": 1056.083, "end": 1062.547, "text": "So so what I mean is that the mind is organizing and managing stress in the ways that it knows how?", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["So so what I mean is that the mind is organizing and managing stress in the ways that it knows how?", 1056.08, 1062.55, 0.8968777656555176]]}, {"start": 1063.411, "end": 1070.107, "text": "Like the other thing I would say is some people are very very anxious and are really struggling with.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["Like the other thing I would say is some people are very very anxious and are really struggling with.", 1063.41, 1070.11, 0.8968777656555176]]}, {"start": 1070.787, "end": 1073.747, "text": "Self-regulation and it looks more like ADHD that it is", "confidence": 0.9, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Self-regulation and it looks more like ADHD that it is", 1070.79, 1073.75, 0.8968777656555176]]}, {"start": 1073.747, "end": 1079.327, "text": "Yeah. And so there may be an ADHD element there but it might be more of an anxiety", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["Yeah. And so there may be an ADHD element there but it might be more of an anxiety", 1073.75, 1079.33, 0.9686737656593323]]}, {"start": 1079.327, "end": 1084.53, "text": "response getting handled through distraction through high, what's the word.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["response getting handled through distraction through high, what's the word.", 1079.33, 1084.53, 0.9686737656593323]]}, {"start": 1085.106, "end": 1091.387, "text": "Frenetic energy. But that's more about anxiety. Well okay and while I'm just", "confidence": 0.97, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Frenetic energy. But that's more about anxiety. Well okay and while I'm just", 1085.11, 1091.39, 0.9686737656593323]]}, {"start": 1091.642, "end": 1096.267, "text": "talking non, I'm giving some theories here but the book also has a great", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["talking non, I'm giving some theories here but the book also has a great", 1091.64, 1096.27, 0.9686737656593323]]}, {"start": 1096.267, "end": 1101.127, "text": "chapter on medication this ADHD 2.0 and it does say that the ADHD medication", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["chapter on medication this ADHD 2.0 and it does say that the ADHD medication", 1096.27, 1101.13, 0.9686737656593323]]}, {"start": 1101.127, "end": 1106.127, "text": "when administered properly is far more, I don't know, efficacious than other medications.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["when administered properly is far more, I don't know, efficacious than other medications.", 1101.13, 1106.13, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1106.567, "end": 1109.767, "text": "And it says that how it can, it's the only thing that can change somebody's life within", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And it says that how it can, it's the only thing that can change somebody's life within", 1106.57, 1109.77, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1109.767, "end": 1114.427, "text": "an hour. But then if the wrong, if it's being taken, I think if somebody with anxiety takes it.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["an hour.", 1109.77, 1110.77, 1.0], ["But then if the wrong, if it's being taken, I think if somebody with anxiety takes it.", 1110.77, 1114.43, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1114.947, "end": 1118.784, "text": "It amps that anxiety. And so I will have people tell me, oh, I'm ADHD as well.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["It amps that anxiety.", 1114.95, 1116.17, 1.0], ["And so I will have people tell me, oh, I'm ADHD as well.", 1116.17, 1118.78, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1119.167, "end": 1123.547, "text": "But they say, but every time I take medication, I just get really jittery or anxious.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But they say, but every time I take medication, I just get really jittery or anxious.", 1119.17, 1123.55, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1123.547, "end": 1125.914, "text": "And when I took medication, I felt like hope.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And when I took medication, I felt like hope.", 1123.55, 1125.91, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1126.085, "end": 1134.367, "text": "I mean, it is all of a sudden, everything came into focus. Diagnostic, right, is the primary factor. Anxiety, absolutely.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I mean, it is all of a sudden, everything came into focus.", 1126.08, 1129.13, 1.0], ["Diagnostic, right, is the primary factor.", 1129.13, 1132.91, 1.0], ["Anxiety, absolutely.", 1132.91, 1134.37, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1134.787, "end": 1140.587, "text": "Also, ADHD really shows up prior to age 12 when it's really just ADHD.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Also, ADHD really shows up prior to age 12", 1134.79, 1138.75, 1.0], ["when it's really just ADHD.", 1138.75, 1140.59, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1140.587, "end": 1146.227, "text": "So it's a fundamental feature. So this same son, you know, it's my child on the autism spectrum,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So it's a fundamental feature.", 1140.59, 1142.15, 1.0], ["So this same son, you know,", 1142.15, 1144.59, 1.0], ["it's my child on the autism spectrum,", 1144.59, 1146.23, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1146.227, "end": 1148.787, "text": "that was a co-occurring reality.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that was a co-occurring reality.", 1146.23, 1148.79, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1148.787, "end": 1153.867, "text": "And yes, when he started taking it, it's like his whole life changed.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And yes, when he started taking it,", 1148.79, 1151.65, 1.0], ["it's like his whole life changed.", 1152.43, 1153.87, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1153.867, "end": 1159.027, "text": "It's like, it was, you know, I became an addict to his medication", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["It's like, it was, you know,", 1153.87, 1156.85, 1.0], ["I became an addict to his medication", 1156.85, 1159.03, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1159.027, "end": 1164.547, "text": "Because when he was taking it, he was able to self-regulate.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Because when he was taking it, he was able to self-regulate.", 1159.03, 1164.55, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1164.547, "end": 1168.867, "text": "He was much more capable socially. He was kinder to his siblings.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["He was much more capable socially.", 1164.55, 1166.87, 1.0], ["He was kinder to his siblings.", 1166.87, 1168.87, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1168.867, "end": 1176.667, "text": "It just helped him get a handle on something. We sometimes wanted to give him medication holidays because we worried a little bit about", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["It just helped him get a handle on something.", 1168.87, 1172.59, 1.0], ["We sometimes wanted to give him medication holidays because we worried a little bit about", 1172.59, 1176.67, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1176.667, "end": 1178.01, "text": "a younger person taking medication.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["a younger person taking medication.", 1176.67, 1178.01, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1178.667, "end": 1182.7, "text": "He never wanted to take them. He's like, everybody gets upset with me when I'm not taking it.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["He never wanted to take them.", 1178.67, 1179.99, 1.0], ["He's like, everybody gets upset with me when I'm not taking it.", 1179.99, 1182.7, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1183.15, "end": 1186.859, "text": "His ability to be social would go up.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["His ability to be social would go up.", 1183.15, 1186.86, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1187.347, "end": 1189.533, "text": "It was a definite indicator that that was.", "confidence": 0.88, "timestamps": [["It was a definite indicator that that was.", 1187.35, 1189.53, 0.8778162002563477]]}, {"start": 1190.073, "end": 1196.897, "text": "Not an issue. I mean, maybe he felt some anxiety because of ADHD, but that was not the primary issue. Yeah.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["Not an issue. I mean, maybe he felt some anxiety because of ADHD, but that was not the primary issue.", 1190.07, 1196.9, 0.9347811341285706], ["Yeah.", 1197.36, 1196.9, 0.9347811341285706]]}, {"start": 1197.423, "end": 1202.723, "text": "No, I love that too, because man, look at it. We're now that I'm going to get to be able to put ADHD in the title with you.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["No, I love that too, because man, look at it.", 1197.42, 1199.62, 0.9347811341285706], ["We're now that I'm going to get to be able to put ADHD in the title with you.", 1199.62, 1202.72, 0.9347811341285706]]}, {"start": 1202.723, "end": 1206.223, "text": "And I'm so excited about it. No, I'm getting about it, Jennifer.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["And I'm so excited about it.", 1202.72, 1204.42, 0.9347811341285706], ["No, I'm getting about it, Jennifer.", 1204.42, 1206.22, 0.9347811341285706]]}, {"start": 1206.781, "end": 1212.515, "text": "I am. But I had this situation where after I was had been on my medication and I didn't get my diagnosis till 46.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["I am.", 1206.78, 1206.46, 0.9347811341285706], ["But I had this situation where after I was had been on my medication and I didn't get my diagnosis till 46.", 1206.78, 1212.52, 0.9347811341285706]]}, {"start": 1212.623, "end": 1221.043, "text": "So a few years ago, and I'm a year or two year into it. I'm supposed to go get a urine test to show that I'm, I don't know, that that's what you do after a year.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["So a few years ago, and I'm a year or two year into it.", 1212.62, 1215.52, 0.9347811341285706], ["I'm supposed to go get a urine test to show that I'm, I don't know, that that's what you do after a year.", 1215.52, 1221.04, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1221.419, "end": 1226.403, "text": "But I was so killing it at work and everything and clients and writing a book and the podcast.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But I was so killing it at work and everything and clients and writing a book and the podcast.", 1221.42, 1226.4, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1226.883, "end": 1229.368, "text": "And I didn't want to take the time. And finally, they were going to cut me off.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I didn't want to take the time.", 1226.88, 1227.76, 1.0], ["And finally, they were going to cut me off.", 1227.76, 1229.37, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1229.485, "end": 1232.803, "text": "And this is a funny thing I've learned since is that there's two time frames with ADHD.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And this is a funny thing I've learned since is that there's two time frames with ADHD.", 1229.48, 1232.8, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1232.803, "end": 1234.094, "text": "It's either now or later.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["It's either now or later.", 1232.8, 1234.09, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1234.418, "end": 1238.001, "text": "So, I was going to do it later. And then later became now when they were going to cut off my supply.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So, I was going to do it later.", 1234.42, 1235.44, 1.0], ["And then later became now when they were going to cut off my supply.", 1235.65, 1238.0, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1238.243, "end": 1244.243, "text": "But this is, I think the story that this is, this relieved my anxiety was I would take it in the morning.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But this is, I think the story that this is, this relieved my anxiety was I would take it in the morning.", 1238.24, 1244.24, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1244.243, "end": 1250.803, "text": "While I went and did the urine test later in the day. And then I get the call maybe a day or two later, and they said, we need you to come", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["While I went and did the urine test later in the day.", 1244.24, 1247.68, 1.0], ["And then I get the call maybe a day or two later, and they said, we need you to come", 1247.68, 1250.8, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1250.803, "end": 1251.513, "text": "in.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["in.", 1250.8, 1251.51, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1251.945, "end": 1257.284, "text": "And I thought, oh no, they found, I must have some sort of something I'm going to die from in my urine.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I thought, oh no, they found, I must have some sort of something I'm going to die from", 1251.95, 1256.52, 1.0], ["in my urine.", 1256.52, 1257.28, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1257.723, "end": 1262.723, "text": "And I went in there and she said, hey, so why is there no methylphenol, the ADHD medication", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I went in there and she said, hey, so why is there no methylphenol, the ADHD medication", 1257.72, 1262.72, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1262.723, "end": 1264.152, "text": "Ritalin? Why is that not in your urine?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Ritalin?", 1262.72, 1263.72, 1.0], ["Why is that not in your urine?", 1263.72, 1264.15, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1264.763, "end": 1270.283, "text": "And I didn't understand. And I was saying, I don't know. I just, I take it NIP.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["And I didn't understand.", 1264.76, 1266.96, 1.0], ["And I was saying, I don't know.", 1266.96, 1268.5, 1.0], ["I just, I take it NIP.", 1268.67, 1270.28, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1270.763, "end": 1277.963, "text": "And then I realized, I said, oh, wait a minute. you think I'm selling it to middle school kids because it wasn't in the and then and so then I", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And then I realized, I said, oh, wait a minute.", 1270.76, 1273.16, 1.0], ["you think I'm selling it to middle school kids because it wasn't in the and then and so then I", 1273.56, 1277.96, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1277.963, "end": 1281.914, "text": "said oh no the last time I took it I think it was maybe one o'clock in that afternoon and then", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["said oh no the last time I took it I think it was maybe one o'clock in that afternoon and then", 1277.96, 1281.91, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1282.274, "end": 1286.363, "text": "and I have the immediate release so then I had metabolized it because I drink a lot of water", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and I have the immediate release so then I had metabolized it because I drink a lot of water", 1282.27, 1286.36, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1286.469, "end": 1291.403, "text": "and and actually that made me feel good because it is something that was out of my system by the", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and and actually that made me feel good because it is something that was out of my system by the", 1286.47, 1291.4, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1291.403, "end": 1296.417, "text": "evening and at that point I felt like okay you know this is this is really helpful yeah yeah", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["evening and at that point I felt like okay you know this is this is really helpful yeah yeah", 1291.4, 1296.42, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1296.849, "end": 1299.189, "text": "Yeah, it's great. Yeah, it can be very helpful.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["Yeah, it's great. Yeah, it can be very helpful.", 1296.85, 1299.19, 0.9172799587249756]]}, {"start": 1299.801, "end": 1305.331, "text": "But ADHD, my go-to is I make jokes about everything internally. So when I really did say,", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["But ADHD, my go-to is I make jokes about everything internally. So when I really did say,", 1299.8, 1305.33, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1305.331, "end": 1308.931, "text": "you think I'm selling it to middle school kids, and that was not funny to say to a psychiatrist,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["you think I'm selling it to middle school kids, and that was not funny to say to a psychiatrist,", 1305.33, 1308.93, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1308.931, "end": 1313.458, "text": "apparently, because they didn't enjoy that joke at all. And I thought it was hilarious. But you", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["apparently, because they didn't enjoy that joke at all. And I thought it was hilarious. But you", 1308.93, 1313.46, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1313.811, "end": 1318.371, "text": "know, you live and you learn a little bit, you know? Okay, so one thing that I was curious to", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["know, you live and you learn a little bit, you know? Okay, so one thing that I was curious to", 1313.81, 1318.37, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1318.371, "end": 1324.648, "text": "get your take on, so I would love to know what you either tell people or what your idea of", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["get your take on, so I would love to know what you either tell people or what your idea of", 1318.37, 1324.65, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1325.008, "end": 1330.611, "text": "the ideal relationship is and the tiny bit of backstory is that when I talk to people and I", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["the ideal relationship is and the tiny bit of backstory is that when I talk to people and I", 1325.01, 1330.61, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1330.769, "end": 1335.491, "text": "think I'm so clever when I say I laid out from the womb till the wedding and I just said that", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["think I'm so clever when I say I laid out from the womb till the wedding and I just said that", 1330.77, 1335.49, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1335.491, "end": 1339.251, "text": "to Christy and I said, man, I'm trademarking that because I never put it that way before.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to Christy and I said, man, I'm trademarking that because I never put it that way before.", 1335.49, 1339.25, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1339.438, "end": 1343.171, "text": "But like, so then I can talk about abandonment and attachment issues in our childhood and then", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But like, so then I can talk about abandonment and attachment issues in our childhood and then", 1339.44, 1343.17, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1343.171, "end": 1347.549, "text": "we show up in relationships and we're trying to be trying to figure out how do I show up so that", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["we show up in relationships and we're trying to be trying to figure out how do I show up so that", 1343.17, 1347.55, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1347.731, "end": 1352.611, "text": "this person will like me because I don't want to be alone. And then I always say we then we're", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["this person will like me because I don't want to be alone. And then I always say we then we're", 1347.73, 1352.61, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1352.611, "end": 1356.642, "text": "enmeshed and codependent and then we go through life and we have experiences and then we say,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["enmeshed and codependent and then we go through life and we have experiences and then we say,", 1352.61, 1356.64, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1357.091, "end": 1361.091, "text": "this is how I feel and this is how I feel and if we're immature, then we jump back into enmeshment", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["this is how I feel and this is how I feel and if we're immature, then we jump back into enmeshment", 1357.09, 1361.09, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1361.091, "end": 1364.537, "text": "like, oh, I can't believe you think that and then we're afraid of abandonment. So, we jump back in.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["like, oh, I can't believe you think that and then we're afraid of abandonment. So, we jump back in.", 1361.09, 1364.54, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1365.329, "end": 1368.531, "text": "And so, then I'm trying to tell people, all right, the goal is differentiated and interdependent,", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["And so, then I'm trying to tell people, all right, the goal is differentiated and interdependent,", 1365.33, 1368.53, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1368.531, "end": 1374.531, "text": "there's going to be invalidation and all those things. But then at that point, I realized I", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["there's going to be invalidation and all those things. But then at that point, I realized I", 1368.53, 1374.53, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1374.531, "end": 1379.651, "text": "sound like a peanuts adult character where I think the people are just like, wah, wah.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["sound like a peanuts adult character where I think the people are just like, wah, wah.", 1374.53, 1379.65, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1379.651, "end": 1384.291, "text": "What are you talking about? Totally. And I don't know why it took me so long, Jennifer. Maybe it's because I felt like I was", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["What are you talking about?", 1379.65, 1381.01, 1.0], ["Totally. And I don't know why it took me so long, Jennifer. Maybe it's because I felt like I was", 1381.01, 1384.29, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1384.291, "end": 1387.731, "text": "getting the validation by people nodding their heads and all. I want that. But then I realized,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["getting the validation by people nodding their heads and all. I want that. But then I realized,", 1384.29, 1387.73, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1387.731, "end": 1393.308, "text": "oh, they don't even know what I'm talking about. And so, how do you or do you lay out the,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["oh, they don't even know what I'm talking about. And so, how do you or do you lay out the,", 1387.73, 1393.31, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1394.298, "end": 1395.919, "text": "here's where we're headed? Or do you just say?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["here's where we're headed? Or do you just say?", 1394.3, 1395.92, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1397.521, "end": 1403.571, "text": "I do a little bit sometimes through like role play or role modeling what differentiated,", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["I do a little bit sometimes through like role play or role modeling what differentiated,", 1397.52, 1403.57, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1404.084, "end": 1411.571, "text": "sounds like and people can recognize it almost immediately as mature.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["sounds like and people can recognize it almost immediately as mature.", 1404.08, 1411.57, 0.9202291369438171]]}, {"start": 1410.538, "end": 1418.523, "text": "Right dealing with an issue but not reactive or punitive or manipulative that like anchored and centered and so.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["Right dealing with an issue but not reactive or punitive or manipulative that like anchored and centered and so.", 1410.54, 1418.52, 0.8956561088562012]]}, {"start": 1419.144, "end": 1420.27, "text": "You know i do think it.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["You know i do think it.", 1419.14, 1420.27, 0.8956561088562012]]}, {"start": 1421.269, "end": 1429.488, "text": "That's sometimes the quickest way to give people a picture of it but it's very conceptual for a lot of people they know that there's something.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["That's sometimes the quickest way to give people a picture of it but it's very conceptual for a lot of people they know that there's something.", 1421.27, 1429.49, 0.8956561088562012]]}, {"start": 1429.992, "end": 1434.648, "text": "This is really like what I actually think is that this is something you feel your way towards", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["This is really like what I actually think is that this is something you feel your way towards", 1429.99, 1434.65, 0.9598912000656128]]}, {"start": 1434.648, "end": 1438.908, "text": "It's something you live your way towards and then when you put language to it, it sounds like.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["It's something you live your way towards and then when you put language to it, it sounds like.", 1434.65, 1438.91, 0.9598912000656128]]}, {"start": 1440.068, "end": 1450.308, "text": "Interdependent down related you use those words But it's very hard to describe in words, especially because most people do not experience it,", "confidence": 0.96, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Interdependent down related you use those words", 1440.07, 1443.55, 0.9598912000656128], ["But it's very hard to describe in words, especially because most people do not experience it,", 1444.25, 1450.31, 0.9598912000656128]]}, {"start": 1450.896, "end": 1456.168, "text": "And so you're trying to use language that we don't have a lot of in our culture and society,", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["And so you're trying to use language that we don't have a lot of in our culture and society,", 1450.9, 1456.17, 0.9598912000656128]]}, {"start": 1456.864, "end": 1466.888, "text": "because most of us are pretty immature and so most of us are living pretty reactively in our relationships so we know those words well and so it's like", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["because most of us are pretty immature and so most of us are living pretty", 1456.86, 1460.53, 0.9898029565811157], ["reactively in our relationships so we know those words well and so it's like", 1460.85, 1466.89, 0.9898029565811157]]}, {"start": 1467.19, "end": 1475.448, "text": "trying to give people a sense of something to reach towards and sometimes the best way to do it actually is to help people see what they're actually", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["trying to give people a sense of something to reach towards and sometimes", 1467.19, 1471.37, 0.9898029565811157], ["the best way to do it actually is to help people see what they're actually", 1471.37, 1475.45, 0.9898029565811157]]}, {"start": 1475.448, "end": 1481.764, "text": "doing that is undermining the friendship because if they can stop doing it what", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["doing that is undermining the friendship because if they can stop doing it what", 1475.45, 1481.76, 0.9898029565811157]]}, {"start": 1482.008, "end": 1488.088, "text": "happens is their brain then has to organize at a higher level if they won't", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["happens is their brain then has to organize at a higher level if they won't", 1482.01, 1488.09, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1488.088, "end": 1490.55, "text": "allow themselves to do the indulgent behavior.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["allow themselves to do the indulgent behavior.", 1488.09, 1490.55, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1491.091, "end": 1495.502, "text": "And that's how people start to feel what more mature feels like.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And that's how people start to feel what more mature feels like.", 1491.09, 1495.5, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1496.258, "end": 1499.886, "text": "Like if I'm not going to manipulate my wife, but I really would like to have sex", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Like if I'm not going to manipulate my wife, but I really would like to have sex", 1496.26, 1499.89, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1499.949, "end": 1505.128, "text": "with her. Okay. Yeah. I need to just be more honest. Okay. But that feels scary.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["with her. Okay. Yeah. I need to just be more honest. Okay. But that feels scary.", 1499.95, 1505.13, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1505.128, "end": 1510.448, "text": "But if I'm not going to be manipulative and deceptive, and I do really desire a", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But if I'm not going to be manipulative and deceptive, and I do really desire a", 1505.13, 1510.45, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1510.448, "end": 1514.568, "text": "sexual relationship, then maybe I need to tolerate the exposure of speaking more", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["sexual relationship, then maybe I need to tolerate the exposure of speaking more", 1510.45, 1514.57, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1514.568, "end": 1516.54, "text": "honestly. Well, then they start to, well, you know,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["honestly. Well, then they start to, well, you know,", 1514.57, 1516.54, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1517.168, "end": 1519.688, "text": "it doesn't mean that the partner's just going to be like, Oh,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["it doesn't mean that the partner's just going to be like, Oh,", 1517.17, 1519.69, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1519.688, "end": 1520.848, "text": "thank you so much for being honest.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["thank you so much for being honest.", 1519.69, 1520.85, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1520.868, "end": 1529.288, "text": "They may push in the opposite direction to get you back, but people start to feel better when they're functioning at a higher level.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["They may push in the opposite direction to get you back,", 1520.87, 1524.28, 1.0], ["but people start to feel better when they're functioning at a higher level.", 1525.12, 1529.29, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1529.288, "end": 1531.688, "text": "They start.", "confidence": 0.72, "timestamps": [["They start.", 1529.29, 1531.69, 0.7215484380722046]]}, {"start": 1530.89, "end": 1536.822, "text": "Acknowledge that something there feels more solid more respect worthy.", "confidence": 0.91, "timestamps": [["Acknowledge that something there feels more solid more respect worthy.", 1530.89, 1536.82, 0.9106075167655945]]}, {"start": 1537.344, "end": 1548.255, "text": "And at a minimum they start to respect themselves more and you know they're actually more of a force to be reckoned with in their marriage then when they were in there more.", "confidence": 0.91, "timestamps": [["And at a minimum they start to respect themselves more and you know they're actually more of a force to be reckoned with in their marriage then when they were in there more.", 1537.34, 1548.26, 0.9106075167655945]]}, {"start": 1548.948, "end": 1556.276, "text": "Petulant or reactive state so i like your question because it's often like how do you show people what we're talking about.", "confidence": 0.91, "timestamps": [["Petulant or reactive state so i like your question because it's often like how do you show people what we're talking about.", 1548.95, 1556.28, 0.9106075167655945]]}, {"start": 1557.032, "end": 1561.56, "text": "But I find the most helpful thing is to help people see what they're doing and how it's", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["But I find the most helpful thing is to help people see what they're doing and how it's", 1557.03, 1561.56, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1561.56, "end": 1563.658, "text": "interfering with their own goals.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["interfering with their own goals.", 1561.56, 1563.66, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1564.279, "end": 1569.86, "text": "Yeah. Okay. And I like what you're saying. And it's funny because I wanted to make the joke and now that we've established ADHD,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Yeah.", 1564.28, 1564.84, 1.0], ["Okay.", 1564.84, 1565.84, 1.0], ["And I like what you're saying.", 1565.84, 1566.84, 1.0], ["And it's funny because I wanted to make the joke and now that we've established ADHD,", 1566.84, 1569.86, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1569.86, "end": 1574.62, "text": "I wanted to say at some point people are listening right now and hearing the want want from both of us.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I wanted to say at some point people are listening right now and hearing the want want from both", 1569.86, 1573.62, 1.0], ["of us.", 1573.62, 1574.62, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1574.62, "end": 1580.68, "text": "That's fine because that is okay. But I also feel like and then if somebody is when you hit on that discomfort for someone,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["That's fine because that is okay.", 1574.62, 1575.84, 1.0], ["But I also feel like and then if somebody is when you hit on that discomfort for someone,", 1575.84, 1580.68, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1580.68, "end": 1585.96, "text": "if I'm going to go back to the ADHD or the rejection sensitivity is man, I do you watch", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["if I'm going to go back to the ADHD or the rejection sensitivity is man, I do you watch", 1580.68, 1585.96, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1586.128, "end": 1590.6, "text": "Do you see that person, not necessarily just an ADHD person, but shut down?", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["Do you see that person, not necessarily just an ADHD person, but shut down?", 1586.13, 1590.6, 0.9434568285942078]]}, {"start": 1590.6, "end": 1595.886, "text": "Or do you see that person try to queue up their yeah, but? Are you watching that happen as well?", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["Or do you see that person try to queue up their yeah, but?", 1590.6, 1594.32, 0.9434568285942078], ["Are you watching that happen as well?", 1594.32, 1595.89, 0.9434568285942078]]}, {"start": 1596.138, "end": 1601.44, "text": "Give me a little more of an example. You mean like, in session when I'm, give me a, give me a.", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["Give me a little more of an example.", 1596.14, 1597.96, 0.9434568285942078], ["You mean like, in session when I'm, give me a, give me a.", 1597.96, 1601.44, 0.9434568285942078]]}, {"start": 1601.44, "end": 1603.48, "text": "Yeah, so I feel like I love everything you're saying.", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["Yeah, so I feel like I love everything you're saying.", 1601.44, 1603.48, 0.9434568285942078]]}, {"start": 1603.48, "end": 1607.52, "text": "And then I'm, I think maybe this is the part where now having been doing couples therapy", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["And then I'm, I think maybe this is the part where now having been doing couples therapy", 1603.48, 1607.52, 0.9434568285942078]]}, {"start": 1607.52, "end": 1612.24, "text": "for so long, I start thinking, I don't want to call it, I say cynically, but the worst", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["for so long, I start thinking, I don't want to call it, I say cynically, but the worst", 1607.52, 1612.24, 0.9434568285942078]]}, {"start": 1612.24, "end": 1613.999, "text": "case scenario of what happens with that.", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["case scenario of what happens with that.", 1612.24, 1614.0, 0.9434568285942078]]}, {"start": 1614.82, "end": 1618.64, "text": "So when I get people then to that place of where, no, it's okay and you're going to feel", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So when I get people then to that place of where, no, it's okay and you're going to feel", 1614.82, 1618.64, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1618.64, "end": 1623.38, "text": "uncomfortable and let me show you what that looks like, that then when that person now", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["uncomfortable and let me show you what that looks like, that then when that person now", 1618.64, 1623.38, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1623.38, "end": 1628.12, "text": "is met with having to really express themselves, that I just, I watched that reactivity or", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["is met with having to really express themselves, that I just, I watched that reactivity or", 1623.38, 1628.12, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1628.12, "end": 1631.103, "text": "I watched that, that hesitancy or hesitation.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I watched that, that hesitancy or hesitation.", 1628.12, 1631.1, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1631.26, "end": 1634.272, "text": "And then I think that can be a hard thing to get somebody to move through.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And then I think that can be a hard thing to get somebody to move through.", 1631.26, 1634.27, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1635.289, "end": 1641.66, "text": "Yeah, it is. It is hard, but I would say when I'm being my most helpful, I'm not trying to get people", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Yeah, it is.", 1635.29, 1636.46, 1.0], ["It is hard, but I would say when I'm being my most helpful, I'm not trying to get people", 1636.46, 1641.66, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1641.66, "end": 1648.62, "text": "to do it. I'm trying to help people see how they're capitulating to their fear, how they're", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to do it. I'm trying to help people see how they're capitulating to their fear, how they're", 1641.66, 1648.62, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1648.62, "end": 1654.66, "text": "moving into a guarded or deceptive position, and it becomes their own courage or their", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["moving into a guarded or deceptive position, and it becomes their own courage or their", 1648.62, 1654.66, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1654.66, "end": 1660.9, "text": "own unhappiness with themselves that pushes them into a clearer position. Now, the person", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["own unhappiness with themselves that pushes them into a clearer position. Now, the person", 1654.66, 1660.9, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1660.9, "end": 1667.9, "text": "on the other side may then get reactive or may want to push away from it, but then I", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["on the other side may then get reactive or may want to push away from it, but then I", 1660.9, 1667.9, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1667.9, "end": 1672.486, "text": "I would go to that person and help them see how they're handling themselves in the face.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I would go to that person and help them see how they're handling themselves in the face.", 1667.9, 1672.49, 0.9961927533149719]]}, {"start": 1673.06, "end": 1676.816, "text": "You say you want to know your partner, but then when he starts to talk straight to you,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["You say you want to know your partner, but then when he starts to talk straight to you,", 1673.06, 1676.82, 0.9961927533149719]]}, {"start": 1677.374, "end": 1678.455, "text": "you punish him for that.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["you punish him for that.", 1677.37, 1678.45, 0.9961927533149719]]}, {"start": 1679.148, "end": 1684.585, "text": "So I'm just helping them see what they're doing because we're so good at lying to ourselves,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So I'm just helping them see what they're doing because we're so good at lying to ourselves,", 1679.15, 1684.59, 0.9961927533149719]]}, {"start": 1684.9, "end": 1689.62, "text": "all of us. We're good at telling ourselves the story that we like about ourselves, not the one", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["all of us.", 1684.9, 1685.9, 0.9961927533149719], ["We're good at telling ourselves the story that we like about ourselves, not the one", 1685.9, 1689.62, 0.9961927533149719]]}, {"start": 1689.62, "end": 1692.498, "text": "that accounts for the most data.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that accounts for the most data.", 1689.62, 1692.5, 0.9961927533149719]]}, {"start": 1693.06, "end": 1697.6, "text": "And so when someone is speaking honestly to you or when a therapist or coach is being", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["And so when someone is speaking honestly to you or when a therapist or coach is being", 1693.06, 1697.6, 0.9730293154716492]]}, {"start": 1697.6, "end": 1702.878, "text": "helpful, they're showing you something that you tend to stay blind to and giving you,", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["helpful, they're showing you something that you tend to stay blind to and giving you,", 1697.6, 1702.88, 0.9730293154716492]]}, {"start": 1703.08, "end": 1704.669, "text": "mind the opportunity.", "confidence": 0.75, "timestamps": [["mind the opportunity.", 1703.08, 1704.67, 0.749220609664917]]}, {"start": 1705.624, "end": 1708.774, "text": "To deal with that truth better. Yeah.", "confidence": 0.84, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["To deal with that truth better.", 1705.62, 1707.87, 0.8408833146095276], ["Yeah.", 1708.46, 1708.77, 0.8408833146095276]]}, {"start": 1708.963, "end": 1713.874, "text": "And that's what helps people get stronger is their minds accommodate more truth about themselves.", "confidence": 0.84, "timestamps": [["And that's what helps people get stronger is their minds accommodate more truth about themselves.", 1708.96, 1713.87, 0.8408833146095276]]}, {"start": 1714.131, "end": 1716.174, "text": "I love your Room for Two podcast. I do.", "confidence": 0.84, "timestamps": [["I love your Room for Two podcast.", 1714.13, 1715.87, 0.8408833146095276], ["I do.", 1715.87, 1716.17, 0.8408833146095276]]}, {"start": 1716.174, "end": 1723.274, "text": "I listen to that often and then I find myself becoming a little pulling some Jennifer cards out in my own sessions.", "confidence": 0.84, "timestamps": [["I listen to that often and then I find myself becoming a little pulling some Jennifer cards out in my own sessions.", 1716.17, 1723.27, 0.8408833146095276]]}, {"start": 1723.274, "end": 1727.574, "text": "Of course, I take credit for them, you know, maybe a lot in even my camp.", "confidence": 0.84, "timestamps": [["Of course, I take credit for them, you know,", 1723.27, 1724.7, 0.8408833146095276], ["maybe a lot in even my camp.", 1726.07, 1727.57, 0.8408833146095276]]}, {"start": 1727.574, "end": 1728.874, "text": "My camp. I always say.", "confidence": 0.84, "timestamps": [["My camp.", 1727.57, 1728.07, 0.8408833146095276], ["I always say.", 1728.07, 1728.87, 0.8408833146095276]]}, {"start": 1729.93, "end": 1738.254, "text": "But I feel like that. No scarcity mentality in mental health.", "confidence": 0.92, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["But I feel like that.", 1729.93, 1730.76, 0.8408833146095276], ["No scarcity mentality in mental health.", 1731.68, 1738.25, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1738.254, "end": 1742.494, "text": "What I tell myself at least, but I think you've said some things like at one point I think", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["What I tell myself at least, but I think you've said some things like at one point I think", 1738.25, 1742.49, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1742.494, "end": 1746.287, "text": "you said something like we put a version of ourselves out and we say, hey, validate this.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["you said something like we put a version of ourselves out and we say, hey, validate this.", 1742.49, 1746.29, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1746.614, "end": 1750.32, "text": "And then the person is saying, but what if I can't? Then it's how dare you?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And then the person is saying, but what if I can't?", 1746.61, 1749.17, 1.0], ["Then it's how dare you?", 1749.17, 1750.32, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1750.574, "end": 1754.814, "text": "But so I really like having that opportunity to say, okay, well, this is some information", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But so I really like having that opportunity to say, okay, well, this is some information", 1750.57, 1754.81, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1754.814, "end": 1759.534, "text": "and yeah, it's an opportunity to self-confront, but that doesn't mean the person absolutely", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and yeah, it's an opportunity to self-confront, but that doesn't mean the person absolutely", 1754.81, 1759.53, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1759.534, "end": 1764.334, "text": "has to. But yeah, when you frame it in a certain way, I feel like then it's almost a welcoming opportunity.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["has to.", 1759.53, 1760.53, 1.0], ["But yeah, when you frame it in a certain way, I feel like then it's almost a welcoming opportunity.", 1760.53, 1764.33, 0.9856212139129639]]}, {"start": 1764.334, "end": 1765.507, "text": "Okay, I'll take a look at that.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["Okay, I'll take a look at that.", 1764.33, 1765.51, 0.9856212139129639]]}, {"start": 1766.034, "end": 1769.414, "text": "And maybe, and that does seem to go well more than it doesn't.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["And maybe, and that does seem to go well more than it doesn't.", 1766.03, 1769.41, 0.9856212139129639]]}, {"start": 1769.414, "end": 1773.574, "text": "Maybe it's just because people are secretly, we want to, we want to grow, we want to be", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["Maybe it's just because people are secretly, we want to, we want to grow, we want to be", 1769.41, 1773.57, 0.9856212139129639]]}, {"start": 1773.574, "end": 1775.574, "text": "better, but it is scary.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["better, but it is scary.", 1773.57, 1775.57, 0.9856212139129639]]}, {"start": 1776.048, "end": 1781.342, "text": "Yeah, it is scary. And I, you know, the psyche is pushing us to be whole.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["Yeah, it is scary.", 1776.05, 1777.73, 0.9856212139129639], ["And I, you know, the psyche is pushing us to be whole.", 1777.73, 1781.34, 0.9856212139129639]]}, {"start": 1781.774, "end": 1785.834, "text": "It is pushing us to accommodate more truth.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["It is pushing us to accommodate more truth.", 1781.77, 1785.83, 0.9856212139129639]]}, {"start": 1786.254, "end": 1789.214, "text": "But we then also have our reactive mind that's afraid of it.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["But we then also have our reactive mind that's afraid of it.", 1786.25, 1789.21, 0.9856212139129639]]}, {"start": 1789.214, "end": 1793.774, "text": "Afraid to go to our shadow, we're afraid to go to the dark parts of ourselves or", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["Afraid to go to our shadow, we're afraid to go to the dark parts of ourselves or", 1789.21, 1793.77, 0.9915385246276855]]}, {"start": 1793.774, "end": 1799.474, "text": "the parts of ourselves that we haven't yet accommodated. And so when our spouse", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["the parts of ourselves that we haven't yet accommodated. And so when our spouse", 1793.77, 1799.47, 0.9915385246276855]]}, {"start": 1799.474, "end": 1803.074, "text": "is the messenger, which they often are because they see us better than we see", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["is the messenger, which they often are because they see us better than we see", 1799.47, 1803.07, 0.9915385246276855]]}, {"start": 1803.074, "end": 1806.954, "text": "ourselves, you know, we try to take them down rather than deal with our darker", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["ourselves, you know, we try to take them down rather than deal with our darker", 1803.07, 1806.95, 0.9915385246276855]]}, {"start": 1806.954, "end": 1811.571, "text": "selves. That's marriage. I mean that's really what marriage is so often. The,", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["selves. That's marriage. I mean that's really what marriage is so often. The,", 1806.95, 1811.57, 0.9915385246276855]]}, {"start": 1812.094, "end": 1817.294, "text": "healthier a couple is, the less pressure it takes to accommodate more truth.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["healthier a couple is, the less pressure it takes to accommodate more truth.", 1812.09, 1817.29, 0.9915385246276855]]}, {"start": 1818.359, "end": 1823.31, "text": "The more willing they are to look at themselves and how they're impacting their partner and do something about it.", "confidence": 0.98, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["The more willing they are to look at themselves and how they're impacting their partner and do something about it.", 1818.36, 1823.31, 0.9807742834091187]]}, {"start": 1823.967, "end": 1830.557, "text": "Not to make the partner happy, but to be a better self in relationship to their partner.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["Not to make the partner happy, but to be a better self in relationship to their partner.", 1823.97, 1830.56, 0.9807742834091187]]}, {"start": 1830.611, "end": 1834.338, "text": "Okay, can I ask you too, Jennifer? I do feel like I...", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["Okay, can I ask you too, Jennifer? I do feel like I...", 1830.61, 1834.34, 0.9807742834091187]]}, {"start": 1834.959, "end": 1841.209, "text": "I don't know if we touched on this maybe the last time we spoke, but how we become therapists and we don't think we're doing it to fix ourselves,", "confidence": 0.98, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["I don't know if we touched on this maybe the last time we spoke, but how we become therapists and we don't think we're doing it to fix ourselves,", 1834.96, 1841.21, 0.9807742834091187]]}, {"start": 1841.209, "end": 1843.502, "text": "but then maybe along the way we realize...", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["but then maybe along the way we realize...", 1841.21, 1843.5, 0.9807742834091187]]}, {"start": 1843.961, "end": 1850.309, "text": "I mean, I love that opportunity to self-confront and I have found, maybe even recently where", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I mean, I love that opportunity to self-confront and I have found, maybe even recently where", 1843.96, 1850.31, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1850.452, "end": 1854.009, "text": "I think I wanted more interaction with my son and he's 19.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I think I wanted more interaction with my son and he's 19.", 1850.45, 1854.01, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1854.009, "end": 1857.96, "text": "And so, then he threw out this offer to go play golf and I immediately reacted with a,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And so, then he threw out this offer to go play golf and I immediately reacted with a,", 1854.01, 1857.96, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1858.482, "end": 1863.209, "text": "pause and I, thank goodness I did a little, I was able to get a do-over and was very present.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["pause and I, thank goodness I did a little, I was able to get a do-over and was very present.", 1858.48, 1863.21, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1863.658, "end": 1866.971, "text": "But you know, my wife and I had a good conversation about it and I loved it because she was able", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But you know, my wife and I had a good conversation about it and I loved it because she was able", 1863.66, 1866.97, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1867.052, "end": 1869.369, "text": "to say, hey, here's what that looked like.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to say, hey, here's what that looked like.", 1867.05, 1869.37, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1869.369, "end": 1873.169, "text": "And I feel like, yeah, when you practice this and there's safety and we're not going to", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I feel like, yeah, when you practice this and there's safety and we're not going to", 1869.37, 1873.17, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1873.309, "end": 1877.409, "text": "perfect at it. I was really grateful that she was able to point out a couple of things that, you", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["perfect at it. I was really grateful that she was able to point out a couple of things that, you", 1873.31, 1877.41, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1877.409, "end": 1882.449, "text": "know, I, and I wanted to immediately defend my ego and say, Oh no, I, you know, I read, read this", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["know, I, and I wanted to immediately defend my ego and say, Oh no, I, you know, I read, read this", 1877.41, 1882.45, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1882.842, "end": 1886.929, "text": "book and masculine the relationship and I asked for a do-over and I was back and that's a good", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["book and masculine the relationship and I asked for a do-over and I was back and that's a good", 1882.84, 1886.93, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1886.929, "end": 1892.209, "text": "thing. And I was like saying, Oh, that sounds good to alleviate my discomfort. But instead of", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["thing. And I was like saying, Oh, that sounds good to alleviate my discomfort. But instead of", 1886.93, 1892.21, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1892.331, "end": 1896.689, "text": "let me hear what it was like, what she saw. And she had a few extra details that I think really", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["let me hear what it was like, what she saw. And she had a few extra details that I think really", 1892.33, 1896.69, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1896.689, "end": 1902.529, "text": "helped with everything from body language to tone that I wasn't even aware of, or I didn't want to", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["helped with everything from body language to tone that I wasn't even aware of, or I didn't want to", 1896.69, 1902.53, 1.0]]}, {"start": 1902.529, "end": 1906.409, "text": "to think, are you finding yourself doing the same thing in your own relationship?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to think, are you finding yourself doing the same thing", 1902.53, 1904.97, 0.9957354664802551], ["in your own relationship?", 1904.97, 1906.41, 0.9957354664802551]]}, {"start": 1906.409, "end": 1910.812, "text": "Because I imagine a lot of people feel like, well, you must already have all this stuff down pat.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Because I imagine a lot of people feel like,", 1906.41, 1907.89, 0.9957354664802551], ["well, you must already have all this stuff down pat.", 1907.89, 1910.81, 0.9957354664802551]]}, {"start": 1910.949, "end": 1911.712, "text": "And maybe you don't.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And maybe you don't.", 1910.95, 1911.71, 0.9957354664802551]]}, {"start": 1912.091, "end": 1914.566, "text": "And maybe you don't. And maybe you don't. Well, let's see.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And maybe you don't.", 1912.09, 1912.57, 0.9957354664802551], ["And maybe you don't.", 1912.68, 1913.27, 0.9957354664802551], ["Well, let's see.", 1913.45, 1914.57, 0.9957354664802551]]}, {"start": 1915.089, "end": 1919.769, "text": "I mean, I'm just thinking about your example and trying to, I don't know if I completely followed", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["I mean, I'm just thinking about your example", 1915.09, 1917.33, 0.9957354664802551], ["and trying to, I don't know if I completely followed", 1917.33, 1919.77, 0.9957354664802551]]}, {"start": 1919.769, "end": 1923.609, "text": "what you're saying, but I think I know what you're saying, which is that you were getting feedback from your wife", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["what you're saying, but I think I know what you're saying,", 1919.77, 1921.41, 0.9957354664802551], ["which is that you were getting feedback from your wife", 1921.41, 1923.61, 0.9957354664802551]]}, {"start": 1923.609, "end": 1926.611, "text": "that was elucidating or showing you something.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that was elucidating or showing you something.", 1923.61, 1926.61, 0.9957354664802551]]}, {"start": 1926.889, "end": 1930.929, "text": "Like she could track your mind better than you could track your mind. Absolutely.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Like she could track your mind better", 1926.89, 1928.89, 0.9957354664802551], ["than you could track your mind.", 1928.89, 1930.09, 0.9957354664802551], ["Absolutely.", 1930.09, 1930.93, 0.9957354664802551]]}, {"start": 1931.04, "end": 1935.729, "text": "And she's saying like you were making this gesture and you were doing this and that's 100% true like.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["And she's saying like you were making this gesture and you were doing this and that's 100% true like.", 1931.04, 1935.73, 0.9679292440414429]]}, {"start": 1936.849, "end": 1940.209, "text": "Spouses can track our minds kids can track our minds,", "confidence": 0.97, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Spouses can track our minds kids can track our minds,", 1936.85, 1940.21, 0.9679292440414429]]}, {"start": 1942.383, "end": 1947.109, "text": "Like my teenager was making fun of me because he's imitating me and my false", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["Like my teenager was making fun of me because he's imitating me and my false", 1942.38, 1947.11, 0.9679292440414429]]}, {"start": 1947.269, "end": 1952.329, "text": "Modesty about something like somebody complimented me and then afterwards he's like, oh, yeah, no, it's nothing,", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["Modesty about something like somebody complimented me and then afterwards he's like, oh, yeah, no, it's nothing,", 1947.27, 1952.33, 0.9679292440414429]]}, {"start": 1953.289, "end": 1957.449, "text": "And the way he's doing it, you know, it's like using my words and it's super", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["And the way he's doing it, you know, it's like using my words and it's super", 1953.29, 1957.45, 0.9679292440414429]]}, {"start": 1957.449, "end": 1961.449, "text": "He's totally saying, I see you, mom.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["He's totally saying, I see you, mom.", 1957.45, 1961.45, 0.9174512624740601]]}, {"start": 1961.449, "end": 1963.769, "text": "You're like, you're not that modest. You know, you, you, you love it.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["You're like, you're not that modest.", 1961.45, 1962.65, 0.9174512624740601], ["You know, you, you, you love it.", 1962.65, 1963.77, 0.9174512624740601]]}, {"start": 1964.089, "end": 1971.129, "text": "So, but, uh, so our kids, our spouses see us, but, but you're asking about in my", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["So, but, uh, so our kids, our spouses see us, but, but you're asking about in my", 1964.09, 1971.13, 0.9174512624740601]]}, {"start": 1971.129, "end": 1973.207, "text": "own marriage, how does it go? Like what's the...", "confidence": 0.82, "timestamps": [["own marriage, how does it go?", 1971.13, 1972.37, 0.9174512624740601], ["Like what's the...", 1972.37, 1973.21, 0.7231719493865967]]}, {"start": 1973.9, "end": 1978.75, "text": "Is that do you have a more specific question? Like yeah Yeah, I do actually", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Is that do you have a more specific question? Like yeah", 1973.9, 1976.79, 0.9973223209381104], ["Yeah, I do actually", 1977.39, 1978.75, 0.9973223209381104]]}, {"start": 1978.932, "end": 1985.11, "text": "Yeah So I mean have you had those opportunities that are things that you weren't necessarily aware of and I'll tell you a more vulnerable", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Yeah", 1978.93, 1979.27, 0.9973223209381104], ["So I mean have you had those opportunities that are things that you weren't necessarily aware of and I'll tell you a more vulnerable", 1979.27, 1985.11, 0.9973223209381104]]}, {"start": 1985.11, "end": 1988.59, "text": "One for me was my wife. She was sharing with me this concept around.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["One for me was my wife. She was sharing with me this concept around.", 1985.11, 1988.59, 0.9973223209381104]]}, {"start": 1989.15, "end": 1994.605, "text": "Sometimes the kids aren't 100% sure she isn't of which version of me that she was gonna get and thankfully I was in a spot", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Sometimes the kids aren't 100% sure she isn't of which version of me that she was gonna get and thankfully I was in a spot", 1989.15, 1994.61, 0.9973223209381104]]}, {"start": 1994.79, "end": 2000.63, "text": "Where I was looking for this feedback We were talking about some things that I were sharing with her about as a couples therapist", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Where I was looking for this feedback", 1994.79, 1996.27, 0.9973223209381104], ["We were talking about some things that I were sharing with her about as a couples therapist", 1996.27, 2000.63, 0.9973223209381104]]}, {"start": 2000.763, "end": 2004.55, "text": "And she said, yeah, sometimes you come in and you're really excited and happy. And in essence,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And she said, yeah, sometimes you come in and you're really excited and happy. And in essence,", 2000.76, 2004.55, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2004.787, "end": 2007.51, "text": "I felt like she was saying, I'm making it rain, throwing out dollar bills, you know,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I felt like she was saying, I'm making it rain, throwing out dollar bills, you know,", 2004.79, 2007.51, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2007.51, "end": 2012.23, "text": "that sort of thing. And other times I might come in and I would say, man, I just feel like everybody,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that sort of thing. And other times I might come in and I would say, man, I just feel like everybody,", 2007.51, 2012.23, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2012.23, "end": 2015.67, "text": "I'm just a paycheck and everybody's taking advantage of me. So, I'm, you know, using", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I'm just a paycheck and everybody's taking advantage of me. So, I'm, you know, using", 2012.23, 2015.67, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2015.67, "end": 2020.07, "text": "extremes. But I was so grateful to be able to say, okay, let me take a look at that. And is there", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["extremes. But I was so grateful to be able to say, okay, let me take a look at that. And is there", 2015.67, 2020.07, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2020.07, "end": 2024.63, "text": "truth in that? And there really was. And then I was able to step back and recognize the days where", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["truth in that? And there really was. And then I was able to step back and recognize the days where", 2020.07, 2024.63, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2024.63, "end": 2029.27, "text": "I, maybe there's something else going on and then I'm coming in and I'm bringing that into the home.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I, maybe there's something else going on and then I'm coming in and I'm bringing that into the home.", 2024.63, 2029.27, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2029.381, "end": 2029.975, "text": "And I didn't like that.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I didn't like that.", 2029.38, 2029.98, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2030.443, "end": 2034.27, "text": "So I don't know. Yeah. Do you have some of those? Yeah.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So I don't know.", 2030.44, 2031.27, 1.0], ["Yeah.", 2031.27, 2032.27, 1.0], ["Do you have some of those?", 2032.27, 2033.27, 1.0], ["Yeah.", 2033.27, 2034.27, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2034.27, "end": 2039.51, "text": "No, I mean, I'm trying to give examples, but absolutely. I mean, I guess I would say that's the thing that's been that I'm probably the most grateful", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["No, I mean, I'm trying to give examples, but absolutely.", 2034.27, 2035.27, 1.0], ["I mean, I guess I would say that's the thing that's been that I'm probably the most grateful", 2035.27, 2039.51, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2039.51, "end": 2043.47, "text": "for about my husband is that he really is a kind soul.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["for about my husband is that he really is a kind soul.", 2039.51, 2043.47, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2043.47, "end": 2047.67, "text": "Like the way that people will describe him is very kind and not nice necessarily.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Like the way that people will describe him is very kind and not nice necessarily.", 2043.47, 2047.67, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2047.67, "end": 2049.78, "text": "Do you know what I mean? He's not a nice guy.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Do you know what I mean?", 2047.67, 2048.67, 1.0], ["He's not a nice guy.", 2048.67, 2049.78, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2050.27, "end": 2057.54, "text": "He really is a kind person and he is willing to be inconvenienced to help other people.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["He really is a kind person and he is willing to be inconvenienced to help other people.", 2050.27, 2057.54, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2058.062, "end": 2063.59, "text": "Okay. That is really who he is, but he's also a very honest person.", "confidence": 0.98, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Okay.", 2058.06, 2058.79, 1.0], ["That is really who he is, but he's also a very honest person.", 2058.79, 2063.59, 0.9638970494270325]]}, {"start": 2063.59, "end": 2067.99, "text": "He's quite loyal and I actually think he sees me through a bit of a rose-colored lens a", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["He's quite loyal and I actually think he sees me through a bit of a rose-colored lens a", 2063.59, 2067.99, 0.9638970494270325]]}, {"start": 2067.99, "end": 2069.765, "text": "lot of the time, which I like.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["lot of the time, which I like.", 2067.99, 2069.77, 0.9638970494270325]]}, {"start": 2069.87, "end": 2080.87, "text": "I won't take it. But on the other hand, he is honest and he will be honest with me and he'll say what he really thinks.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["I won't take it.", 2069.87, 2074.43, 0.9638970494270325], ["But on the other hand, he is honest and he will be honest with me and he'll say what", 2074.43, 2079.87, 0.9638970494270325], ["he really thinks.", 2079.87, 2080.87, 0.9638970494270325]]}, {"start": 2081.207, "end": 2085.663, "text": "He's not saying it usually to get me to think something. just willing to reveal his own mind.", "confidence": 0.91, "timestamps": [["He's not saying it usually to get me to think something.", 2081.21, 2083.55, 0.9638970494270325], ["just willing to reveal his own mind.", 2083.55, 2085.66, 0.8551973104476929]]}, {"start": 2086.221, "end": 2095.809, "text": "Yeah, and I guess while he can get upset sometimes or be mad at me I don't have the feeling like he's trying to hurt me or trying to agenda. Yeah,", "confidence": 0.97, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Yeah, and I guess while he can get upset sometimes or be mad at me", 2086.22, 2089.75, 0.9727983474731445], ["I don't have the feeling like he's trying to hurt me or trying to agenda. Yeah,", 2090.57, 2095.81, 0.9727983474731445]]}, {"start": 2096.682, "end": 2102.911, "text": "Yeah, and so that's extremely helpful. It doesn't mean that when he gives me, you know says things that are truthful that I'm.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["Yeah, and so that's extremely helpful. It doesn't mean that when he gives me, you know says things that are truthful that I'm.", 2096.68, 2102.91, 0.9727983474731445]]}, {"start": 2103.821, "end": 2110.471, "text": "You know, I'm often like, you know, I often will react with it first, you know, no you're wrong and defensively", "confidence": 0.97, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["You know, I'm often like, you know, I often will react with it first, you know, no you're wrong and defensively", 2103.82, 2110.47, 0.9727983474731445]]}, {"start": 2110.471, "end": 2115.991, "text": "But the thing is, he makes himself highly credible because he doesn't have an agenda", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But the thing is, he makes himself highly credible because he doesn't have an agenda", 2110.47, 2115.99, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2115.991, "end": 2122.471, "text": "to hurt me or take me down or even prove his mind to me most of the time.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to hurt me or take me down or even prove his mind to me most of the time.", 2115.99, 2122.47, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2122.471, "end": 2128.379, "text": "It's usually about just, this is what I think, or this is what I see, or this is what I see you do.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["It's usually about just, this is what I think, or this is what I see, or this is what I see", 2122.47, 2127.69, 1.0], ["you do.", 2127.69, 2128.38, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2129.231, "end": 2135.221, "text": "And so that's harder to, I do care about being honest with myself and I care about being fair to him.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And so that's harder to, I do care about being honest with myself and I care about being", 2129.23, 2134.15, 1.0], ["fair to him.", 2134.15, 2135.22, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2135.869, "end": 2139.911, "text": "I don't mean to say that I'm always being honest with myself and always being fair,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I don't mean to say that I'm always being honest with myself and always being fair,", 2135.87, 2139.91, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2139.911, "end": 2147.734, "text": "But I do value those things and so it matters to me to deal with what he's saying.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But I do value those things and so it matters to me to deal with what he's saying.", 2139.91, 2147.73, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2148.031, "end": 2153.311, "text": "But he also really does make it easier, which I'm really grateful for because if he were", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But he also really does make it easier, which I'm really grateful for because if he were", 2148.03, 2153.31, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2153.311, "end": 2157.7, "text": "meaner about it, I could justify not looking at myself.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["meaner about it, I could justify not looking at myself.", 2153.31, 2157.7, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2157.911, "end": 2163.511, "text": "If he were more defensive or had his own insecurities playing out in that, even if he was saying", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["If he were more defensive or had his own insecurities playing out in that, even if he was saying", 2157.91, 2163.51, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2163.749, "end": 2169.751, "text": "exactly what's true about me, it would make it easier to justify not seeing myself.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["exactly what's true about me, it would make it easier to justify not seeing myself.", 2163.75, 2169.75, 0.9018059968948364]]}, {"start": 2170.411, "end": 2177.045, "text": "Yeah. And so, yeah. And, you know, it goes both ways. I'll give my honest thoughts about things.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["Yeah.", 2170.41, 2170.75, 0.9018059968948364], ["And so, yeah.", 2170.75, 2171.64, 0.9018059968948364], ["And, you know, it goes both ways.", 2172.17, 2174.31, 0.9018059968948364], ["I'll give my honest thoughts about things.", 2174.31, 2177.05, 0.9018059968948364]]}, {"start": 2177.231, "end": 2178.765, "text": "I do think...", "confidence": 0.65, "timestamps": [["I do think...", 2177.23, 2178.76, 0.6540077328681946]]}, {"start": 2179.728, "end": 2186.507, "text": "It's why we get along is because there is a basic sense of honesty and that makes the marriage feel freer.", "confidence": 0.93, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["It's why we get along is because there is a basic sense of honesty and that makes the marriage feel freer.", 2179.73, 2186.51, 0.931976854801178]]}, {"start": 2187.155, "end": 2191.638, "text": "Yeah i like what you said i'm trying to manage each other a lot that they feel.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["Yeah i like what you said i'm trying to manage each other a lot that they feel.", 2187.16, 2191.64, 0.931976854801178]]}, {"start": 2191.98, "end": 2202.108, "text": "You know i was working with a couple yesterday and the sex is just always awkward and their time and the interactions are often awkward but that's because they are always pretending.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["You know i was working with a couple yesterday and the sex is just always awkward and their time and the interactions are often awkward but that's because they are always pretending.", 2191.98, 2202.11, 0.931976854801178]]}, {"start": 2202.855, "end": 2208.022, "text": "They really struggle to be honest and so there's a lot of manipulation and management.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["They really struggle to be honest and so there's a lot of manipulation and management.", 2202.85, 2208.02, 0.9282790422439575]]}, {"start": 2208.382, "end": 2215.678, "text": "I don't mean dark mean manipulative, I mean masking, managing what's said, managing what's shown.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["I don't mean dark mean manipulative, I mean masking, managing what's said, managing what's shown.", 2208.38, 2215.68, 0.9282790422439575]]}, {"start": 2215.953, "end": 2222.878, "text": "And rather than I would like to have sex, it's more like, do you want to have sex or what do you have in mind for tonight or whatever.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["And rather than I would like to have sex, it's more like, do you want to have sex or what do you have in mind for tonight or whatever.", 2215.95, 2222.88, 0.9282790422439575]]}, {"start": 2222.878, "end": 2227.188, "text": "And it's just this kind of constant masking of minds.", "confidence": 0.93, "timestamps": [["And it's just this kind of constant masking of minds.", 2222.88, 2227.19, 0.9282790422439575]]}, {"start": 2227.638, "end": 2232.278, "text": "So it always there's always pretending and whenever you're pretending with someone it's super awkward,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["So it always there's always pretending and whenever you're pretending with someone it's super awkward,", 2227.64, 2232.28, 0.9775063991546631]]}, {"start": 2233.21, "end": 2238.618, "text": "There's no intimacy and a lot of couples do a lot of pretending because they're afraid.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["There's no intimacy and a lot of couples do a lot of pretending because they're afraid.", 2233.21, 2238.62, 0.9775063991546631]]}, {"start": 2239.755, "end": 2243.958, "text": "To tolerate they don't tolerate more honesty in themselves or in their partner,", "confidence": 0.98, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["To tolerate they don't tolerate more honesty in themselves or in their partner,", 2239.76, 2243.96, 0.9775063991546631]]}, {"start": 2244.76, "end": 2250.918, "text": "Or their spouse punishes a lot if they speak honestly, so they've learned to not do it, but there's you know that people,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["Or their spouse punishes a lot if they speak honestly, so they've learned to not do it, but there's you know that people,", 2244.76, 2250.92, 0.9775063991546631]]}, {"start": 2251.538, "end": 2256.121, "text": "People claim to love the truth, but the truth is hard.", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["People claim to love the truth, but the truth is hard.", 2251.54, 2256.12, 0.9456639289855957]]}, {"start": 2256.298, "end": 2260.226, "text": "The truth is challenging. The truth pushes us to grow up.", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["The truth is challenging.", 2256.3, 2257.76, 0.9456639289855957], ["The truth pushes us to grow up.", 2257.9, 2260.23, 0.9456639289855957]]}, {"start": 2260.538, "end": 2263.341, "text": "And like you said, we want it, but we avoid it.", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["And like you said, we want it, but we avoid it.", 2260.54, 2263.34, 0.9456639289855957]]}, {"start": 2263.978, "end": 2267.815, "text": "You know, it's like Jung said something like, the information we most need.", "confidence": 0.91, "timestamps": [["You know, it's like Jung said something like,", 2263.98, 2265.63, 0.9456639289855957], ["the information we most need.", 2265.82, 2267.82, 0.8698669075965881]]}, {"start": 2268.643, "end": 2273.693, "text": "Is hiding in the places we least want to look. And that's that kind of the realities about", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Is hiding in the places we least want to look. And that's that kind of the realities about", 2268.64, 2273.69, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2273.693, "end": 2279.293, "text": "ourselves that scare us because they push us into growth. But if we if we avoid them,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["ourselves that scare us because they push us into growth. But if we if we avoid them,", 2273.69, 2279.29, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2279.293, "end": 2283.773, "text": "then they really do run our lives. I agree. And I like that because the more I think we talk about", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["then they really do run our lives. I agree. And I like that because the more I think we talk about", 2279.29, 2283.77, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2283.893, "end": 2288.893, "text": "the sitting with the uncomfortable feelings and tell me if you agree and you don't have to agree", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["the sitting with the uncomfortable feelings and tell me if you agree and you don't have to agree", 2283.89, 2288.89, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2288.893, "end": 2293.533, "text": "with this at all. But I feel like we are so unused to doing that that it isn't as scary.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["with this at all. But I feel like we are so unused to doing that that it isn't as scary.", 2288.89, 2293.53, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2294.381, "end": 2297.993, "text": "As we think it is once we practice it, right?", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["As we think it is once we practice it, right?", 2294.38, 2297.99, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2297.993, "end": 2301.873, "text": "There's a researcher named, well, researcher, writer Terrence McKenna of olden days,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["There's a researcher named, well, researcher,", 2297.99, 2299.85, 1.0], ["writer Terrence McKenna of olden days,", 2299.85, 2301.87, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2301.873, "end": 2305.513, "text": "and he used to say it's like jumping out into the great abyss and finding out it's a feather bed.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and he used to say it's like jumping out", 2301.87, 2303.25, 1.0], ["into the great abyss and finding out it's a feather bed.", 2303.25, 2305.51, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2305.513, "end": 2311.033, "text": "And I love that example because I feel like when we can sit through some of that discomfort", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I love that example because I feel like", 2305.51, 2307.79, 1.0], ["when we can sit through some of that discomfort", 2307.79, 2311.03, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2311.033, "end": 2314.673, "text": "and then, I love what you're saying, find growth, then all of a sudden, well, I do.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and then, I love what you're saying, find growth,", 2311.03, 2312.94, 1.0], ["then all of a sudden, well, I do.", 2313.31, 2314.67, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2314.673, "end": 2318.498, "text": "Would you say the psyche is pushed that way? I want growth and now I'm excited about it.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Would you say the psyche is pushed that way?", 2314.67, 2316.55, 1.0], ["I want growth and now I'm excited about it.", 2316.55, 2318.5, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2318.913, "end": 2322.313, "text": "Yeah, I think the psyche, I mean, Jung talks about this a lot,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Yeah, I think the psyche, I mean,", 2318.91, 2320.56, 1.0], ["Jung talks about this a lot,", 2320.91, 2322.31, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2322.313, "end": 2328.283, "text": "and that we're striving for wholeness, that that's what our minds are trying to do,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and that we're striving for wholeness,", 2322.31, 2325.74, 1.0], ["that that's what our minds are trying to do,", 2326.23, 2328.28, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2328.793, "end": 2335.153, "text": "or that our dreams is the psyche trying to reveal aspects of our lives, ourselves,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["or that our dreams is the psyche trying to reveal", 2328.79, 2333.04, 1.0], ["aspects of our lives, ourselves,", 2333.35, 2335.15, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2335.153, "end": 2340.473, "text": "that we are tending to not wanna deal with, and so it's kind of the psyche pushing towards wholeness,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that we are tending to not wanna deal with,", 2335.15, 2337.47, 1.0], ["and so it's kind of the psyche pushing towards wholeness,", 2337.47, 2340.47, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2340.473, "end": 2346.913, "text": "but we have another part of our brain that wants stasis, that wants control, that wants, it's the ego, right?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["but we have another part of our brain that wants stasis,", 2340.47, 2343.63, 1.0], ["that wants control, that wants, it's the ego, right?", 2343.63, 2346.91, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2347.287, "end": 2353.742, "text": "And the ego, we need the ego, but the ego can be the enemy sometimes because the ego loves control.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And the ego, we need the ego,", 2347.29, 2349.23, 1.0], ["but the ego can be the enemy sometimes", 2349.51, 2351.27, 1.0], ["because the ego loves control.", 2351.27, 2353.74, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2354.293, "end": 2358.27, "text": "And yet we have so very little control. And the more we cling,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And yet we have so very little control.", 2354.29, 2356.6, 1.0], ["And the more we cling,", 2356.99, 2358.27, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2358.441, "end": 2360.755, "text": "the less and less control we actually have.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["the less and less control we actually have.", 2358.44, 2360.75, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2361.273, "end": 2366.913, "text": "And so we've got two pressures in our psyches, but there's certainly one that's pushing us towards growth.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And so we've got two pressures in our psyches,", 2361.27, 2364.33, 1.0], ["but there's certainly one that's pushing us towards growth.", 2364.51, 2366.91, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2366.913, "end": 2374.333, "text": "But you know, a lot of times when the body is in reaction, I had a client who always was having pain and rashing,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But you know, a lot of times when the body is in reaction,", 2366.91, 2369.33, 1.0], ["I had a client who always was having pain and rashing,", 2369.33, 2374.33, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2374.993, "end": 2379.053, "text": "and all this, and she would blame her body. Like, my body's turned against me.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and all this, and she would blame her body.", 2374.99, 2377.03, 1.0], ["Like, my body's turned against me.", 2377.03, 2379.05, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2379.053, "end": 2381.883, "text": "My body doesn't want me to be happy. My body's working against me.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["My body doesn't want me to be happy.", 2379.05, 2380.65, 1.0], ["My body's working against me.", 2380.65, 2381.88, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2382.819, "end": 2387.373, "text": "But this, you know, she started working with a doctor that did this, was also a therapist", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["But this, you know, she started working with a doctor", 2382.82, 2385.49, 1.0], ["that did this, was also a therapist", 2385.49, 2387.37, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2387.373, "end": 2389.773, "text": "and working with a lot of these kinds of meanings.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and working with a lot of these kinds of meanings.", 2387.37, 2389.77, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2389.773, "end": 2395.173, "text": "And as she started to pay attention to her body, she saw that her body was trying to help her.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And as she started to pay attention to her body,", 2389.77, 2393.07, 1.0], ["she saw that her body was trying to help her.", 2393.07, 2395.17, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2395.173, "end": 2400.959, "text": "Her body would go into a physical reaction when there was something going on in her relationships", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Her body would go into a physical reaction", 2395.17, 2397.94, 1.0], ["when there was something going on in her relationships", 2398.09, 2400.96, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2401.346, "end": 2403.939, "text": "that was working against the best in her.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that was working against the best in her.", 2401.35, 2403.94, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2404.073, "end": 2408.836, "text": "And so once she stopped blaming her body and understanding her body wanted her to thrive.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And so once she stopped blaming her body", 2404.07, 2406.29, 1.0], ["and understanding her body wanted her to thrive.", 2406.29, 2408.84, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2409.547, "end": 2412.873, "text": "Well, then it really changed it because first of all, it allowed her to address things", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Well, then it really changed it because first of all,", 2409.55, 2411.57, 1.0], ["it allowed her to address things", 2411.57, 2412.87, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2412.873, "end": 2416.693, "text": "that were going on in her life. It allowed her to stop being in a combative relationship", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that were going on in her life.", 2412.87, 2414.01, 1.0], ["It allowed her to stop being in a combative relationship", 2414.01, 2416.69, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2416.693, "end": 2418.882, "text": "with her body that's really trying to sustain her.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["with her body that's really trying to sustain her.", 2416.69, 2418.88, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2419.433, "end": 2425.445, "text": "And also allowed her to address things and change things. So her body reacts less, way less now.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And also allowed her to address things and change things.", 2419.43, 2422.49, 1.0], ["So her body reacts less, way less now.", 2422.49, 2425.45, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2425.533, "end": 2431.341, "text": "And even when it does, she sees it as a gift to pay attention to what's happening in our relationships.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["And even when it does, she sees it as a gift", 2425.53, 2428.23, 1.0], ["to pay attention to what's happening in our relationships.", 2428.59, 2431.34, 0.9819049835205078]]}, {"start": 2432.089, "end": 2436.339, "text": "Oh, that, I mean, the body keeps the score, the Russell Vander Kalk. And I have to tell you as", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Oh, that, I mean, the body keeps the score, the Russell Vander Kalk. And I have to tell you as", 2432.09, 2436.34, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2436.339, "end": 2439.459, "text": "well, I don't ever get a chance to do this, but I've had a couple of people that have reached out", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["well, I don't ever get a chance to do this, but I've had a couple of people that have reached out", 2436.34, 2439.46, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2439.459, "end": 2443.459, "text": "to me and said that you've said nice things, referred people if I'm working in the world of", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to me and said that you've said nice things, referred people if I'm working in the world of", 2439.46, 2443.46, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2443.459, "end": 2448.739, "text": "emotional immaturity or narcissism or that sort of thing. And I think that that's really come up a", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["emotional immaturity or narcissism or that sort of thing. And I think that that's really come up a", 2443.46, 2448.74, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2448.739, "end": 2453.699, "text": "lot there where if I'm helping people, I've got these tenants where no one wants to say,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["lot there where if I'm helping people, I've got these tenants where no one wants to say,", 2448.74, 2453.7, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2453.865, "end": 2458.168, "text": "my partner is narcissistic. So I feel like I meet people where they're at. Because if they read", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["my partner is narcissistic. So I feel like I meet people where they're at. Because if they read", 2453.86, 2458.17, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2458.267, "end": 2462.979, "text": "material that talks about narcissism that says, don't finish the paragraph, leave. And no one's", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["material that talks about narcissism that says, don't finish the paragraph, leave. And no one's", 2458.27, 2462.98, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2462.979, "end": 2466.579, "text": "going to do that because they don't even know what that means or what that looks like. And so,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["going to do that because they don't even know what that means or what that looks like. And so,", 2462.98, 2466.58, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2466.579, "end": 2470.979, "text": "so I say raise your baseline, that's self-care, get your PhD in gaslighting,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["so I say raise your baseline, that's self-care, get your PhD in gaslighting,", 2466.58, 2470.98, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2470.979, "end": 2474.819, "text": "get out of unproductive conversations, set boundaries and know a boundary is a challenge", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["get out of unproductive conversations, set boundaries and know a boundary is a challenge", 2470.98, 2474.82, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2474.819, "end": 2479.018, "text": "to the emotionally immature. And then I talk about, you know, nothing you will do will cause", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to the emotionally immature. And then I talk about, you know, nothing you will do will cause", 2474.82, 2479.02, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2479.219, "end": 2482.97, "text": "them to have this aha moment or epiphany that they have to come up with that on their own.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["them to have this aha moment or epiphany that they have to come up with that on their own.", 2479.22, 2482.97, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2483.219, "end": 2487.379, "text": "And I feel like what that one's the hardest one for people to break. And I feel like their body", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I feel like what that one's the hardest one for people to break. And I feel like their body", 2483.22, 2487.38, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2487.379, "end": 2491.765, "text": "ends up being the thing that is the thing that I feel like they eventually realize that.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["ends up being the thing that is the thing that I feel like they eventually realize that.", 2487.38, 2491.76, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2492.499, "end": 2497.859, "text": "Every time I try to go back in and try to make sense of, explain, caretake, you know,", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Every time I try to go back in and try to make sense of, explain, caretake, you know,", 2492.5, 2497.86, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2497.859, "end": 2502.379, "text": "that then they start to feel panic attacks or headaches or memory is a challenge.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that then they start to feel panic attacks or headaches or memory is a challenge.", 2497.86, 2502.38, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2502.379, "end": 2505.819, "text": "And so I like what you're saying because I mean, that is, I feel like that's the final", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And so I like what you're saying because I mean, that is, I feel like that's the final", 2502.38, 2505.82, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2505.819, "end": 2509.913, "text": "straw of helping somebody recognize maybe that they aren't safe in the relationship,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["straw of helping somebody recognize maybe that they aren't safe in the relationship,", 2505.82, 2509.91, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2510.419, "end": 2514.179, "text": "when their body is trying to say, I'm trying everything. I'm trying anxiety.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["when their body is trying to say, I'm trying everything.", 2510.42, 2513.18, 1.0], ["I'm trying anxiety.", 2513.18, 2514.18, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2514.179, "end": 2516.638, "text": "I'm trying depression. don't make me give you a heart attack.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["I'm trying depression.", 2514.18, 2515.18, 1.0], ["don't make me give you a heart attack.", 2515.18, 2516.64, 0.9831196665763855]]}, {"start": 2516.939, "end": 2521.699, "text": "And that's what I think can happen. Yeah. Right, exactly. When we're trying to control", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["And that's what I think can happen.", 2516.94, 2518.41, 0.9831196665763855], ["Yeah.", 2518.66, 2519.23, 0.9831196665763855], ["Right, exactly.", 2519.53, 2520.32, 0.9831196665763855], ["When we're trying to control", 2520.32, 2521.7, 0.9831196665763855]]}, {"start": 2521.699, "end": 2523.066, "text": "what we don't have control over.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["what we don't have control over.", 2521.7, 2523.07, 0.9831196665763855]]}, {"start": 2523.699, "end": 2527.579, "text": "Yeah. Especially another, a partner that won't self-confront. You know?", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["Yeah.", 2523.7, 2524.54, 0.9831196665763855], ["Especially another, a partner that won't self-confront.", 2524.54, 2526.74, 0.9831196665763855], ["You know?", 2527.22, 2527.58, 0.9831196665763855]]}, {"start": 2527.579, "end": 2533.539, "text": "Oh. That illusion is often hard to let go of because you want the control, the fantasy", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["Oh.", 2527.58, 2528.94, 0.9831196665763855], ["That illusion is often hard to let go of", 2528.94, 2531.26, 0.9831196665763855], ["because you want the control, the fantasy", 2531.26, 2533.54, 0.9831196665763855]]}, {"start": 2533.539, "end": 2536.739, "text": "that if you say the right thing, do the right thing, whatever,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["that if you say the right thing,", 2533.54, 2534.94, 0.9831196665763855], ["do the right thing, whatever,", 2534.94, 2536.74, 0.9831196665763855]]}, {"start": 2536.739, "end": 2540.599, "text": "they're gonna space themselves, they're gonna become a kinder person or whatever.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["they're gonna space themselves,", 2536.74, 2538.66, 0.9831196665763855], ["they're gonna become a kinder person or whatever.", 2538.66, 2540.6, 0.9831196665763855]]}, {"start": 2541.259, "end": 2547.11, "text": "And often, you know, the body is in reaction to that, but also giving up that project is the only chance.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["And often, you know, the body is in reaction to that,", 2541.26, 2544.42, 0.9831196665763855], ["but also giving up that project is the only chance.", 2544.42, 2547.11, 0.9675900936126709]]}, {"start": 2547.714, "end": 2554.684, "text": "Yeah, yeah. So, okay, this did actually lead to I think what I initially reached out to ask Christy to.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Yeah, yeah. So, okay, this did actually lead to I think what I initially reached out to ask Christy to.", 2547.71, 2554.68, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2555.402, "end": 2561.404, "text": "Bring up was so when I do get a guy into therapy and I was even going to tell you a funny thing", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Bring up was so when I do get a guy into therapy and I was even going to tell you a funny thing", 2555.4, 2561.4, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2561.404, "end": 2565.484, "text": "when we were going to jump on and then I forgot but I was just talking with my intern, my associate,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["when we were going to jump on and then I forgot but I was just talking with my intern, my associate,", 2561.4, 2565.48, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2565.484, "end": 2570.204, "text": "Nate Christensen and he's a big brain guy but he said he just was reading that therapy was initially", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Nate Christensen and he's a big brain guy but he said he just was reading that therapy was initially", 2565.48, 2570.2, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2570.204, "end": 2574.524, "text": "someone was saying that therapy was initially for women and that's why it's all about feelings.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["someone was saying that therapy was initially for women and that's why it's all about feelings.", 2570.2, 2574.52, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2574.524, "end": 2580.044, "text": "That was Freud's, I guess, goal and that, and that, you know, so men, it needs to, okay, and that men", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["That was Freud's, I guess, goal and that, and that, you know, so men, it needs to, okay, and that men", 2574.52, 2580.04, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2580.044, "end": 2583.324, "text": "need to do things differently. And so that's why, and then he went into this thing about", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["need to do things differently. And so that's why, and then he went into this thing about", 2580.04, 2583.32, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2583.324, "end": 2589.244, "text": "vasopressin and that it's about aggression and that men can feel close even when there is stress", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["vasopressin and that it's about aggression and that men can feel close even when there is stress", 2583.32, 2589.24, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2589.244, "end": 2593.324, "text": "or aggression and then how that can, and I thought that was an interesting thing. I thought that was", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["or aggression and then how that can, and I thought that was an interesting thing. I thought that was", 2589.24, 2593.32, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2593.324, "end": 2597.084, "text": "really fascinating, but where I was going with that was, so I get a lot of men that come to me,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["really fascinating, but where I was going with that was, so I get a lot of men that come to me,", 2593.32, 2597.08, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2597.084, "end": 2601.324, "text": "I think because I don't know, maybe it's as simple as I'm a guy. I don't know. But then", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I think because I don't know, maybe it's as simple as I'm a guy. I don't know. But then", 2597.08, 2601.32, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2601.324, "end": 2605.679, "text": "when I can get a guy to feel heard and understood, maybe do a little self-confrontation,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["when I can get a guy to feel heard and understood, maybe do a little self-confrontation,", 2601.32, 2605.68, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2605.964, "end": 2610.284, "text": "I find that there are times where I have examples where the wife has said, this is what I want. I", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I find that there are times where I have examples where the wife has said, this is what I want. I", 2605.96, 2610.28, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2610.284, "end": 2614.853, "text": "want this guy who will hear me and open up and stay present. And then, and now I, you know,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["want this guy who will hear me and open up and stay present. And then, and now I, you know,", 2610.28, 2614.85, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2615.004, "end": 2620.684, "text": "on occasion I can get a guy to that place. And then it's as if the wife now starts to push more", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["on occasion I can get a guy to that place. And then it's as if the wife now starts to push more", 2615.0, 2620.68, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2620.684, "end": 2625.084, "text": "buttons. And when I did some betrayal trauma training with Dr. Skinner, Kevin Skinner,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["buttons. And when I did some betrayal trauma training with Dr. Skinner, Kevin Skinner,", 2620.68, 2625.08, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2625.084, "end": 2627.996, "text": "a long time ago, he would talk about, you know, okay, that they're testing for safety or.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["a long time ago, he would talk about, you know, okay, that they're testing for safety or.", 2625.08, 2628.0, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2628.482, "end": 2632.65, "text": "Things may go well in a couple of years down the road. You know, she may say, I don't, I don't even", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Things may go well in a couple of years down the road. You know, she may say, I don't, I don't even", 2628.48, 2632.65, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2632.924, "end": 2637.943, "text": "know if this is, if I should have come back and if the guy says, man, thank you for sharing, I'm here.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["know if this is, if I should have come back and if the guy says, man, thank you for sharing, I'm here.", 2632.92, 2637.94, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2638.358, "end": 2643.324, "text": "Okay. It keeps her amygdala calm and still testing. But I have found that I'm curious if you", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Okay. It keeps her amygdala calm and still testing. But I have found that I'm curious if you", 2638.36, 2643.32, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2643.324, "end": 2648.124, "text": "see or what your thoughts are on that. If I do have this, this guy show up differently and the", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["see or what your thoughts are on that. If I do have this, this guy show up differently and the", 2643.32, 2648.12, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2648.124, "end": 2653.564, "text": "wife has said, this is all I've ever wanted, but now that more buttons are pressed and I will have", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["wife has said, this is all I've ever wanted, but now that more buttons are pressed and I will have", 2648.12, 2653.56, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2653.564, "end": 2657.084, "text": "a guy all of a sudden now say, well, wait a minute. Now, is she the narcissist or is she", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["a guy all of a sudden now say, well, wait a minute. Now, is she the narcissist or is she", 2653.56, 2657.08, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2657.084, "end": 2661.98, "text": "the emotionally immature and I wanted to say okay I hear you but let's slow down a little bit but", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["the emotionally immature and I wanted to say okay I hear you but let's slow down a little bit but", 2657.08, 2661.98, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2662.364, "end": 2668.044, "text": "it's I don't know if that's just her her body the re can a change happen too fast is it yeah what do", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["it's I don't know if that's just her her body the re can a change happen too fast is it yeah what do", 2662.36, 2668.04, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2668.044, "end": 2677.884, "text": "you think well I you know so a couple things I I tend when I'm working with people to not just", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["you think well I you know so a couple things I I tend when I'm working with people to not just", 2668.04, 2677.88, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2677.884, "end": 2682.124, "text": "think okay let's let's say that you have a narcissistic partner I mean there's a lot that", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["think okay let's let's say that you have a narcissistic partner I mean there's a lot that", 2677.88, 2682.12, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2682.124, "end": 2685.964, "text": "I would even say about that because that's oh me too yes let's just say like somebody that", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I would even say about that because that's oh me too yes let's just say like somebody that", 2682.12, 2685.96, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2685.964, "end": 2686.964, "text": "Emotionally immature.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["Emotionally immature.", 2685.96, 2686.96, 0.9671763777732849]]}, {"start": 2687.285, "end": 2693.804, "text": "He's been emotionally immature, has tended to dominate situations and take too much, right?", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["He's been emotionally immature, has tended to dominate situations and take too much,", 2687.28, 2692.73, 0.9671763777732849], ["right?", 2692.8, 2693.8, 0.9671763777732849]]}, {"start": 2693.804, "end": 2698.004, "text": "And let's say that there's the, let's just put it in this form that the woman is the", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["And let's say that there's the, let's just put it in this form that the woman is the", 2693.8, 2698.0, 0.9671763777732849]]}, {"start": 2698.004, "end": 2704.044, "text": "one who's been kind of burned by that and she's exhausted by it and he's starting to", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["one who's been kind of burned by that and she's exhausted by it and he's starting to", 2698.0, 2704.04, 0.9671763777732849]]}, {"start": 2704.044, "end": 2705.668, "text": "self confront and change.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["self confront and change.", 2704.04, 2705.67, 0.9671763777732849]]}, {"start": 2706.604, "end": 2712.59, "text": "The way I tend to talk to the person in the woman's position in this example is that.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["The way I tend to talk to the person in the woman's position in this example is that.", 2706.6, 2712.59, 0.9671763777732849]]}, {"start": 2713.608, "end": 2725.472, "text": "Your goal isn't just to trust your partner and your goal isn't just to wait until they have become safe i'm not really thinking that frame so much the goal is.", "confidence": 0.91, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Your goal isn't just to trust your partner and your goal isn't just to wait until they have become safe i'm not really thinking that frame so much the goal is.", 2713.61, 2725.47, 0.912502646446228]]}, {"start": 2725.95, "end": 2734.439, "text": "Yes if you're gonna choose this person they need to grow into somebody who's more capable of handling the house while they know you,", "confidence": 0.91, "timestamps": [["Yes if you're gonna choose this person they need to grow into somebody who's more capable of handling the house while they know you,", 2725.95, 2734.44, 0.912502646446228]]}, {"start": 2734.871, "end": 2744.098, "text": "that they need to learn how to be a self without dominating or taking too much and that matters but you also wife have been.", "confidence": 0.86, "timestamps": [["that they need to learn how to be a self without dominating or taking too much and that matters but you also wife have been.", 2734.87, 2744.1, 0.8621477484703064]]}, {"start": 2744.575, "end": 2748.14, "text": "Operating in a marriage in which you are the.", "confidence": 0.86, "timestamps": [["Operating in a marriage in which you are the.", 2744.58, 2748.14, 0.8621477484703064]]}, {"start": 2748.851, "end": 2761.358, "text": "Over function or it doesn't look like it from what i'm saying but i'm in a relationship with a person is over function they're trying to make things right trying to manage that guy's ego they're trying to keep him happy give him the sex that will keep.", "confidence": 0.86, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Over function or it doesn't look like it from what i'm saying but i'm in a relationship with a person is over function they're trying to make things right trying to manage that guy's ego they're trying to keep him happy give him the sex that will keep.", 2748.85, 2761.36, 0.8621477484703064]]}, {"start": 2761.358, "end": 2771.078, "text": "And so they're doing all these things in the fantasy that if they do everything he will be okay and they will be okay and so she has to also grow out of that.", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["And so they're doing all these things in the fantasy that if they do everything he will be okay and they will be okay and so she has to also grow out of that.", 2761.36, 2771.08, 0.9495634436607361]]}, {"start": 2771.609, "end": 2784.05, "text": "And let's just say the guy really does start to self confront and really is dealing with himself yeah there's a certain amount of testing are you really are you really there for me but.", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["And let's just say the guy really does start to self confront and really is dealing with himself yeah there's a certain amount of testing are you really are you really there for me but.", 2771.61, 2784.05, 0.9495634436607361]]}, {"start": 2784.708, "end": 2790.658, "text": "What is also, and I'm not saying this is always the case, for me it means I've got to discern what's happening here.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["What is also, and I'm not saying this is always the case,", 2784.71, 2787.82, 1.0], ["for me it means I've got to discern what's happening here.", 2787.82, 2790.66, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2790.658, "end": 2795.105, "text": "Is this guy really not as developed as he's saying and she can track it?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Is this guy really not as developed as he's saying", 2790.66, 2793.59, 1.0], ["and she can track it?", 2793.98, 2795.1, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2795.627, "end": 2802.748, "text": "Or is it that she wants the too little too late position because then she doesn't have to grow up.", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["Or is it that she wants the too little too late position", 2795.63, 2800.56, 1.0], ["because then she doesn't have to grow up.", 2800.88, 2802.75, 0.8952198624610901]]}, {"start": 2803.675, "end": 2814.541, "text": "I think it's something that's all the husband all the time in this case you know doing everything to make that person okay is also intimacy avoidant even though it doesn't look like it.", "confidence": 0.84, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["I think it's something that's all the husband all the time in this case you know doing everything to make that person okay is also intimacy avoidant even though it doesn't look like it.", 2803.68, 2814.54, 0.8428362011909485]]}, {"start": 2815.477, "end": 2828.431, "text": "They want to be needed they want to be the solution they want to be the one that the guy needs in a sense and so that's that's a need based frame not an intimacy frame.", "confidence": 0.84, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["They want to be needed they want to be the solution they want to be the one that the guy needs in a sense and so that's that's a need based frame not an intimacy frame.", 2815.48, 2828.43, 0.8428362011909485]]}, {"start": 2828.819, "end": 2840.62, "text": "Somebody that thinks they have to follow over themselves to prove themselves to the narcissistic guy doesn't have a solid sense of self isn't clear that being no is a safe thing by anyone.", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["Somebody that thinks they have to follow over themselves to prove themselves to the narcissistic guy doesn't have a solid sense of self isn't clear that being no is a safe thing by anyone.", 2828.82, 2840.62, 0.9452680945396423]]}, {"start": 2841.26, "end": 2851.918, "text": "Yes no part of the reason i chose this guy is because they don't have to be that known by him when he's the only part when he's the only show in town in his mind so if he's growing out of that.", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["Yes no part of the reason i chose this guy is because they don't have to be that known by him when he's the only part when he's the only show in town in his mind so if he's growing out of that.", 2841.26, 2851.92, 0.9452680945396423]]}, {"start": 2852.846, "end": 2855.978, "text": "That's a very different thing than she wants to actually be known.", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["That's a very different thing than she wants to actually be known.", 2852.85, 2855.98, 0.9386665225028992]]}, {"start": 2856.685, "end": 2858.67, "text": "Now a lot of us talk about I don't feel seen.", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["Now a lot of us talk about I don't feel seen.", 2856.69, 2858.67, 0.9386665225028992]]}, {"start": 2858.845, "end": 2860.92, "text": "I don't know that many people that actually want to be seen.", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["I don't know that many people that actually want to be seen.", 2858.85, 2860.92, 0.9386665225028992]]}, {"start": 2861.285, "end": 2868.357, "text": "They just want the good parts to be seen. Yes. And so a lot of times people are complaining about that.", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["They just want the good parts to be seen.", 2861.29, 2863.29, 0.9386665225028992], ["Yes.", 2863.29, 2864.29, 0.9386665225028992], ["And so a lot of times people are complaining about that.", 2864.29, 2868.36, 0.9386665225028992]]}, {"start": 2870.364, "end": 2869.941, "text": "Sorry, I've got all this. Hang on one second.", "confidence": 0.94, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Sorry, I've got all this.", 2870.36, 2869.45, 0.9386665225028992], ["Hang on one second.", 2870.36, 2869.94, 0.9386665225028992]]}, {"start": 2870.445, "end": 2873.125, "text": "I have to tell you, Jennifer, as you were saying this, and this is actually, this is", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["I have to tell you, Jennifer, as you were saying this, and this is actually, this is", 2870.45, 2873.13, 0.9386665225028992]]}, {"start": 2873.125, "end": 2878.405, "text": "so good because I can talk about this. The light then went through your blinds and shone and it was this, you all of a sudden,", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["so good because I can talk about this.", 2873.13, 2874.77, 0.9386665225028992], ["The light then went through your blinds and shone and it was this, you all of a sudden,", 2874.77, 2878.41, 0.9386665225028992]]}, {"start": 2878.405, "end": 2884.254, "text": "you know, the skies parted, heaven smiled upon you, and then you gave the world this gift. Exactly, right?", "confidence": 0.89, "timestamps": [["you know, the skies parted, heaven smiled upon you,", 2878.41, 2880.97, 0.8885643482208252], ["and then you gave the world this gift.", 2880.97, 2883.37, 0.8885643482208252], ["Exactly, right?", 2883.37, 2884.25, 0.8885643482208252]]}, {"start": 2884.325, "end": 2885.974, "text": "Yeah. That's what it was.", "confidence": 0.89, "timestamps": [["Yeah.", 2884.33, 2885.01, 0.8885643482208252], ["That's what it was.", 2885.17, 2885.97, 0.8885643482208252]]}, {"start": 2886.235, "end": 2893.045, "text": "Well. Yes. Okay. Nice. So her ability to actually be knowable, right?", "confidence": 0.89, "timestamps": [["Well.", 2886.24, 2886.83, 0.8885643482208252], ["Yes.", 2886.99, 2887.67, 0.8885643482208252], ["Okay.", 2887.67, 2888.49, 0.8885643482208252], ["Nice.", 2888.49, 2889.33, 0.8885643482208252], ["So her ability to actually be knowable, right?", 2889.33, 2893.05, 0.8885643482208252]]}, {"start": 2893.045, "end": 2896.426, "text": "How many of us really want our partner It'll look into our soul.", "confidence": 0.85, "timestamps": [["How many of us really want our partner", 2893.05, 2894.85, 0.8885643482208252], ["It'll look into our soul.", 2894.85, 2896.43, 0.8106004595756531]]}, {"start": 2897.263, "end": 2903.663, "text": "I'm gonna get it right flies and all the take the scary yeah so.", "confidence": 0.8, "timestamps": [["I'm gonna get it right flies and all the take the scary yeah so.", 2897.26, 2903.66, 0.7970578670501709]]}, {"start": 2904.23, "end": 2909.488, "text": "It's often like i don't trust you i still don't trust you is a way of getting away from.", "confidence": 0.8, "timestamps": [["It's often like i don't trust you i still don't trust you is a way of getting away from.", 2904.23, 2909.49, 0.7970578670501709]]}, {"start": 2909.983, "end": 2919.426, "text": "That anxiety yeah there may be things going on on his side but you don't want to keep his growth from it doesn't have to be.", "confidence": 0.8, "timestamps": [["That anxiety yeah there may be things going on on his side but you don't want to keep his growth from it doesn't have to be.", 2909.98, 2919.43, 0.7970578670501709]]}, {"start": 2920.263, "end": 2926.753, "text": "He must be fully grown up before you deal with yourself. She also needs to be dealing with her own overfunctioning", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["He must be fully grown up before you deal with yourself.", 2920.26, 2923.65, 1.0], ["She also needs to be dealing with her own overfunctioning", 2924.07, 2926.75, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2926.753, "end": 2929.932, "text": "and her need to be needed and her anxiety about her worthiness.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and her need to be needed", 2926.75, 2927.91, 1.0], ["and her anxiety about her worthiness.", 2927.91, 2929.93, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2930.313, "end": 2934.964, "text": "That is so good. And I feel like this is where, and I would, I mean, there is real.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["That is so good.", 2930.31, 2931.47, 1.0], ["And I feel like this is where,", 2931.47, 2932.9, 1.0], ["and I would, I mean, there is real.", 2932.99, 2934.96, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2935.713, "end": 2940.284, "text": "Incredibly emotionally immature or strong narcissistic trait and tendency people", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Incredibly emotionally immature", 2935.71, 2937.23, 1.0], ["or strong narcissistic trait and tendency people", 2937.64, 2940.28, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2940.553, "end": 2943.706, "text": "that are still looking for the buttons to press and the way to manipulate.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that are still looking for the buttons to press", 2940.55, 2942.83, 1.0], ["and the way to manipulate.", 2942.83, 2943.71, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2943.993, "end": 2947.713, "text": "Yeah. So I do, you know, and I know I work a lot with that population. So that, right?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Yeah.", 2943.99, 2944.83, 1.0], ["So I do, you know,", 2944.83, 2945.54, 1.0], ["and I know I work a lot with that population.", 2945.65, 2946.87, 1.0], ["So that, right?", 2946.87, 2947.71, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2947.713, "end": 2952.313, "text": "And that can be really difficult, I like what you're saying because I do feel like some point, because if it really is the", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["And that can be really difficult,", 2947.71, 2948.79, 1.0], ["I like what you're saying because I do feel like some point, because if it really is the", 2948.79, 2952.31, 0.984047532081604]]}, {"start": 2952.313, "end": 2956.723, "text": "narcissist, I would imagine that's a, in this scenario, we're talking about a wife who then", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["narcissist, I would imagine that's a, in this scenario, we're talking about a wife who then", 2952.31, 2956.72, 0.984047532081604]]}, {"start": 2956.984, "end": 2961.673, "text": "grew up not necessarily seeing the boundaries modeled or secure attachment in childhood,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["grew up not necessarily seeing the boundaries modeled or secure attachment in childhood,", 2956.98, 2961.67, 0.984047532081604]]}, {"start": 2961.673, "end": 2965.753, "text": "so she didn't know how to say no or that sort of thing and so maybe that has led to that.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["so she didn't know how to say no or that sort of thing and so maybe that has led to that.", 2961.67, 2965.75, 0.984047532081604]]}, {"start": 2966.175, "end": 2965.833, "text": "Pete and Rachel Yeah.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["Pete and Rachel Yeah.", 2966.18, 2965.83, 0.984047532081604]]}, {"start": 2966.393, "end": 2969.272, "text": "Pete And so, I know that can be hard, but I love what you're saying because,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["Pete And so, I know that can be hard, but I love what you're saying because,", 2966.39, 2969.27, 0.984047532081604]]}, {"start": 2969.893, "end": 2974.313, "text": "I think this is where it's hard for me because I want to at times just say, not to, hey, give", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["I think this is where it's hard for me because I want to at times just say, not to, hey, give", 2969.89, 2974.31, 0.984047532081604]]}, {"start": 2974.313, "end": 2979.13, "text": "give them a chance, but I like this concept of, I call it introducing positive tension.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["give them a chance, but I like this concept of,", 2974.31, 2977.31, 1.0], ["I call it introducing positive tension.", 2977.31, 2979.13, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2979.473, "end": 2985.033, "text": "So now let's have a chance to really use the tools. I've got these four pillars of a connected conversation", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So now let's have a chance to really use the tools.", 2979.47, 2982.43, 1.0], ["I've got these four pillars of a connected conversation", 2982.43, 2985.03, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2985.033, "end": 2986.833, "text": "based off of emotionally focused therapy.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["based off of emotionally focused therapy.", 2985.03, 2986.83, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2986.997, "end": 2990.472, "text": "And that's where I feel like we no longer have to have the guy just say, no, I get it now.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And that's where I feel like we no longer have to have", 2987.0, 2989.07, 1.0], ["the guy just say, no, I get it now.", 2989.07, 2990.47, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2990.553, "end": 2994.613, "text": "And she says, oh, okay. Now I want her to say, well, tell me more. What do you get?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And she says, oh, okay.", 2990.55, 2991.99, 1.0], ["Now I want her to say, well, tell me more.", 2992.11, 2993.87, 1.0], ["What do you get?", 2993.87, 2994.61, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2994.753, "end": 2996.486, "text": "What do you understand? What is different now?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["What do you understand?", 2994.75, 2995.59, 1.0], ["What is different now?", 2995.59, 2996.49, 1.0]]}, {"start": 2996.833, "end": 3002.364, "text": "Because I find that the real emotionally immature says it. I mean, I get, I'm telling you, I get it, I'm ready.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Because I find that the real emotionally immature says it.", 2996.83, 3000.02, 1.0], ["I mean, I get, I'm telling you, I get it, I'm ready.", 3000.13, 3002.36, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3002.813, "end": 3006.893, "text": "And that's where I feel like you'll find quickly how if the guy is really self-confronting", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["And that's where I feel like you'll find quickly", 3002.81, 3004.77, 0.9824637174606323], ["how if the guy is really self-confronting", 3004.77, 3006.89, 0.9824637174606323]]}, {"start": 3006.893, "end": 3008.666, "text": "or able to sit with that. Absolutely.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["or able to sit with that.", 3006.89, 3008.02, 0.9824637174606323], ["Absolutely.", 3008.17, 3008.67, 0.9824637174606323]]}, {"start": 3009.133, "end": 3011.582, "text": "Yeah, okay. Get something to say about it. It's not just.", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["Yeah, okay.", 3009.13, 3009.97, 0.9824637174606323], ["Get something to say about it.", 3009.97, 3011.01, 0.9824637174606323], ["It's not just.", 3011.01, 3011.58, 0.8653577566146851]]}, {"start": 3012.348, "end": 3022.798, "text": "You know, like, well, then I went I apologize. Okay, what did you apologize for? What exactly like if it's deep? It's true self confrontation. There's something there. I can see that I do this to you.", "confidence": 0.92, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["You know, like, well, then I went I apologize. Okay, what did you apologize for? What exactly like if it's deep? It's true self confrontation. There's something there. I can see that I do this to you.", 3012.35, 3022.8, 0.9233192801475525]]}, {"start": 3023.474, "end": 3039.318, "text": "So much ever. Yeah, I tend to say with people is that, you know, we're all we're all narcissistic. I mean, in a sense, we all start out very self preoccupied, even if we are somebody who is always nice and can never let anybody be disappointed with us.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["So much ever. Yeah, I tend to say with people is that, you know, we're all we're all narcissistic. I mean, in a sense, we all start out very self preoccupied, even if we are somebody who is always nice and can never let anybody be disappointed with us.", 3023.47, 3039.32, 0.9233192801475525]]}, {"start": 3039.814, "end": 3045.089, "text": "It's about managing our ego needs and so there is a self-centric element to it and,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["It's about managing our ego needs and so there is a self-centric element to it and,", 3039.81, 3045.09, 0.9798038601875305]]}, {"start": 3045.878, "end": 3052.638, "text": "As we are willing to self-confront know other people's experience of us know ourselves in relationship", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["As we are willing to self-confront know other people's experience of us know ourselves in relationship", 3045.88, 3052.64, 0.9798038601875305]]}, {"start": 3052.948, "end": 3054.638, "text": "We're able to grow out of our egocentrism,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["We're able to grow out of our egocentrism,", 3052.95, 3054.64, 0.9798038601875305]]}, {"start": 3055.432, "end": 3057.638, "text": "So narcissistic people are often.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["So narcissistic people are often.", 3055.43, 3057.64, 0.9798038601875305]]}, {"start": 3058.678, "end": 3063.438, "text": "Egocentric in a particular way Yeah, but I try to make a distinction with people between", "confidence": 0.98, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Egocentric in a particular way", 3058.68, 3060.63, 0.9798038601875305], ["Yeah, but I try to make a distinction with people between", 3061.14, 3063.44, 0.9798038601875305]]}, {"start": 3063.438, "end": 3067.18, "text": "between narcissistic and narcissistically impaired.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["between narcissistic and narcissistically impaired.", 3063.44, 3067.18, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3067.378, "end": 3071.502, "text": "You know, a narcissistically impaired person is a person that is not going to yield.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["You know, a narcissistically impaired person", 3067.38, 3069.28, 1.0], ["is a person that is not going to yield.", 3069.28, 3071.5, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3071.958, "end": 3076.336, "text": "They're not gonna change. They aren't able or willing to actually self-confront.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["They're not gonna change.", 3071.96, 3072.92, 1.0], ["They aren't able or willing to actually self-confront.", 3073.15, 3076.34, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3076.418, "end": 3079.063, "text": "They may give all the verbiage and know how to make it look like it,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["They may give all the verbiage", 3076.42, 3077.72, 1.0], ["and know how to make it look like it,", 3077.72, 3079.06, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3079.678, "end": 3086.184, "text": "but they're not actually in any kind of self-confrontation in the wee hours of the night.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["but they're not actually in any kind of self-confrontation", 3079.68, 3084.21, 1.0], ["in the wee hours of the night.", 3084.34, 3086.18, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3086.798, "end": 3089.918, "text": "And that's very different than somebody who's inclined to go one up", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And that's very different", 3086.8, 3088.0, 1.0], ["than somebody who's inclined to go one up", 3088.0, 3089.92, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3089.918, "end": 3093.438, "text": "but is willing to look honestly at themselves", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["but is willing to look honestly at themselves", 3089.92, 3093.44, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3093.438, "end": 3095.898, "text": "and to start dealing with who they are.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and to start dealing with who they are.", 3093.44, 3095.9, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3096.398, "end": 3101.538, "text": "That's a person, you don't have to be perfect to trust that person, you just have to be with someone", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["That's a person, you don't have to be perfect", 3096.4, 3099.09, 1.0], ["to trust that person, you just have to be with someone", 3099.28, 3101.54, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3101.538, "end": 3106.034, "text": "who's willing and able to do that and it matters to them to be a decent human.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["who's willing and able to do that", 3101.54, 3103.16, 1.0], ["and it matters to them to be a decent human.", 3103.16, 3106.03, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3106.678, "end": 3110.418, "text": "If it only matters to you when you're trying to convince your narcissistic partner", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["If it only matters to you when you're trying", 3106.68, 3108.44, 1.0], ["to convince your narcissistic partner", 3108.44, 3110.42, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3110.418, "end": 3114.238, "text": "that they should be a decent person, that's not gonna go well.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that they should be a decent person,", 3110.42, 3112.05, 1.0], ["that's not gonna go well.", 3112.52, 3114.24, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3114.238, "end": 3118.718, "text": "If they want to be a decent person and you can tell it and they're willing to deal with themselves", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["If they want to be a decent person and you can tell it", 3114.24, 3117.16, 1.0], ["and they're willing to deal with themselves", 3117.16, 3118.72, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3118.718, "end": 3121.725, "text": "and you see them doing it, that's a good person.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["and you see them doing it, that's a good person.", 3118.72, 3121.73, 0.9672983884811401]]}, {"start": 3122.472, "end": 3127.362, "text": "To be challenged with and to be addressing your half of that dynamic with, not because you gotta", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["To be challenged with and to be addressing your half of that dynamic with, not because you gotta", 3122.47, 3127.36, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3127.362, "end": 3132.642, "text": "wait for them to be perfect, because you can see that they do want to grow and they want to be", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["wait for them to be perfect, because you can see that they do want to grow and they want to be", 3127.36, 3132.64, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3132.642, "end": 3137.442, "text": "better and they're willing to be honest, right? Even if it takes some work sometimes, but they're", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["better and they're willing to be honest, right? Even if it takes some work sometimes, but they're", 3132.64, 3137.44, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3137.442, "end": 3143.522, "text": "willing to grow. That's a trustworthy person. The people that get entrenched and stay there and won't,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["willing to grow. That's a trustworthy person. The people that get entrenched and stay there and won't,", 3137.44, 3143.52, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3144.162, "end": 3147.762, "text": "be challenged, well, it's not a good choice to be in a relationship.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["be challenged, well, it's not a good choice to be in a relationship.", 3144.16, 3147.76, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3147.762, "end": 3152.198, "text": "No, and I don't know if I gave you credit for this last time we spoke, but when we spoke", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["No, and I don't know if I gave you credit for this last time we spoke, but when we spoke", 3147.76, 3152.2, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3152.402, "end": 3155.842, "text": "a couple of times ago and we were talking about narcissism, you had mentioned everybody's", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["a couple of times ago and we were talking about narcissism, you had mentioned everybody's", 3152.4, 3155.84, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3155.842, "end": 3156.842, "text": "a little narcissistic.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["a little narcissistic.", 3155.84, 3156.84, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3156.842, "end": 3161.162, "text": "And at that time, I remember feeling a little bit like, well, no, I mean, I don't think", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And at that time, I remember feeling a little bit like, well, no, I mean, I don't think", 3156.84, 3161.16, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3161.162, "end": 3167.718, "text": "I think I framed the question wrong, but absolutely right. And then in that, so I've got the Waking Up to Narcissism podcast, which is now as big", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I think I framed the question wrong, but absolutely right.", 3161.16, 3164.32, 1.0], ["And then in that, so I've got the Waking Up to Narcissism podcast, which is now as big", 3164.32, 3167.72, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3167.842, "end": 3169.014, "text": "as the virtual couch.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["as the virtual couch.", 3167.84, 3169.01, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3169.282, "end": 3172.922, "text": "And in that one, I was very intentional about nine or 10 episodes in, I had an episode", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And in that one, I was very intentional about nine or 10 episodes in, I had an episode", 3169.28, 3172.92, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3172.922, "end": 3174.682, "text": "called Wait, Am I the Narcissist?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["called Wait, Am I the Narcissist?", 3172.92, 3174.68, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3174.682, "end": 3179.202, "text": "And I really did lay out the narcissistic personality disorders, maybe two or three", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I really did lay out the narcissistic personality disorders, maybe two or three", 3174.68, 3179.2, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3179.202, "end": 3180.482, "text": "percent of the population.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["percent of the population.", 3179.2, 3180.48, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3180.482, "end": 3183.762, "text": "But if you start with we're all emotionally immature, and that's where I give you a little", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But if you start with we're all emotionally immature, and that's where I give you a little", 3180.48, 3183.76, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3183.762, "end": 3186.362, "text": "nod, then we can work from there.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["nod, then we can work from there.", 3183.76, 3186.36, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3186.362, "end": 3190.902, "text": "And I have found that is a much better place to operate from.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I have found that is a much better place to operate from.", 3186.36, 3190.9, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3190.902, "end": 3194.41, "text": "And I feel like the people I work with are willing to say, okay, I can take a look at", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I feel like the people I work with are willing to say, okay, I can take a look at", 3190.9, 3194.41, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3194.518, "end": 3198.882, "text": "emotional immaturity, but the narcissism, I think it just carries so much.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["emotional immaturity, but the narcissism, I think it just carries so much.", 3194.52, 3198.88, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3198.882, "end": 3202.908, "text": "It's out in the zeitgeist so much. It carries a lot of negativity. negativity. Yeah.", "confidence": 0.83, "timestamps": [["It's out in the zeitgeist so much.", 3198.88, 3200.2, 1.0], ["It carries a lot of negativity.", 3200.2, 3201.2, 1.0], ["negativity.", 3201.2, 3202.2, 0.6500130891799927], ["Yeah.", 3202.2, 3202.91, 0.6500130891799927]]}, {"start": 3203.619, "end": 3210.229, "text": "Right. And be problematic. Everybody's exes and ours. Yes, yes. That is a fact. Actually, I've been told I on", "confidence": 0.98, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Right. And be problematic. Everybody's exes and ours.", 3203.62, 3206.47, 0.9773978590965271], ["Yes, yes. That is a fact. Actually, I've been told I on", 3206.47, 3210.23, 0.9773978590965271]]}, {"start": 3210.229, "end": 3214.269, "text": "TikTok, as a matter of fact, yeah, so it's a it's a fact. I", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["TikTok, as a matter of fact, yeah, so it's a it's a fact. I", 3210.23, 3214.27, 0.9773978590965271]]}, {"start": 3214.349, "end": 3222.578, "text": "mean, that's what you find out that all the all the exes are indeed, that's the case. That makes me laugh. So in that part,", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["mean, that's what you find out that all the all the exes are", 3214.35, 3217.95, 0.9773978590965271], ["indeed, that's the case. That makes me laugh. So in that part,", 3217.95, 3222.58, 0.9773978590965271]]}, {"start": 3222.709, "end": 3228.229, "text": "I so appreciate that, too. And okay, if you have a couple more minutes, there is now that I feel like, boy, I feel like", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["I so appreciate that, too. And okay, if you have a couple more", 3222.71, 3225.87, 0.9773978590965271], ["minutes, there is now that I feel like, boy, I feel like", 3225.87, 3228.23, 0.9773978590965271]]}, {"start": 3228.229, "end": 3232.949, "text": "we've covered all these fun things today is from a therapist standpoint, I would love your thoughts on another", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["we've covered all these fun things today is from a", 3228.23, 3230.51, 0.9773978590965271], ["therapist standpoint, I would love your thoughts on another", 3230.51, 3232.95, 0.9773978590965271]]}, {"start": 3233.164, "end": 3239.109, "text": "thing and maybe I'm wanting you to validate me or compliment my fragile ego. So, there are some", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["thing and maybe I'm wanting you to validate me or compliment my fragile ego. So, there are some", 3233.16, 3239.11, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3239.109, "end": 3244.732, "text": "groups that I'm a part of and I love and a lot of them quote you, which is amazing and wonderful.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["groups that I'm a part of and I love and a lot of them quote you, which is amazing and wonderful.", 3239.11, 3244.73, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3245.092, "end": 3248.054, "text": "And there will be something that we brought up where someone will talk about, you know,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And there will be something that we brought up where someone will talk about, you know,", 3245.09, 3248.05, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3248.549, "end": 3255.109, "text": "the crucible method versus EFT, for example, and then people will get pretty discouraged about it.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["the crucible method versus EFT, for example, and then people will get pretty discouraged about it.", 3248.55, 3255.11, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3255.109, "end": 3261.589, "text": "Yeah, right? And I have a copy and paste available now where I say as an EFT therapist and then a", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Yeah, right? And I have a copy and paste available now where I say as an EFT therapist and then a", 3255.11, 3261.59, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3261.747, "end": 3265.989, "text": "thousand couples later or whatever. And I've tried to make it into this Four Pillars of a", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["thousand couples later or whatever. And I've tried to make it into this Four Pillars of a", 3261.75, 3265.99, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3265.989, "end": 3269.669, "text": "Connected Conversation, Preston Pugmire, who I know you know, helped me create this course.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Connected Conversation, Preston Pugmire, who I know you know, helped me create this course.", 3265.99, 3269.67, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3270.317, "end": 3276.6, "text": "And so, that was him helping coach these tangible steps and I love it so much. And so, then I feel", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["And so, that was him helping coach these tangible steps and I love it so much. And so, then I feel", 3270.32, 3276.6, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3276.709, "end": 3281.509, "text": "like then I'm all on board with differentiation and clean up your side of the street and not", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["like then I'm all on board with differentiation and clean up your side of the street and not", 3276.71, 3281.51, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3281.509, "end": 3286.638, "text": "looking for that external validation, but I find my copy and paste says that that is amazing,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["looking for that external validation, but I find my copy and paste says that that is amazing,", 3281.51, 3286.64, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3286.926, "end": 3290.608, "text": "but I feel like sometimes what I'm reading is somebody says, this is all I can do is take care", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["but I feel like sometimes what I'm reading is somebody says, this is all I can do is take care", 3286.93, 3290.61, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3290.789, "end": 3295.349, "text": "of me and if my partner doesn't show up then this is not a viable relationship.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["of me and if my partner doesn't show up then this is not a viable relationship.", 3290.79, 3295.35, 0.9811064004898071]]}, {"start": 3295.349, "end": 3299.589, "text": "And so I've been saying now, well I feel like the EFT, emotionally focused therapy, my four", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["And so I've been saying now, well I feel like the EFT, emotionally focused therapy, my four", 3295.35, 3299.59, 0.9811064004898071]]}, {"start": 3299.589, "end": 3304.229, "text": "pillars. That's the conduit to communicate to then maybe help get to that.", "confidence": 0.95, "timestamps": [["pillars. That's the conduit to communicate to then maybe help get to that.", 3299.59, 3304.23, 0.9488668441772461]]}, {"start": 3304.804, "end": 3308.094, "text": "Place of differentiation or but I would love to know your thoughts like do you have just", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Place of differentiation or but I would love to know your thoughts like do you have just", 3304.8, 3308.09, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3308.094, "end": 3311.925, "text": "overall thoughts on the EFT versus the crucible method or those sort of things?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["overall thoughts on the EFT versus the crucible method or those sort of things?", 3308.09, 3311.93, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3311.979, "end": 3316.574, "text": "I mean I do I do I don't tend to like to get into well I'm happy to answer it but I'm just", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I mean I do I do I don't tend to like to get into well I'm happy to answer it but I'm just", 3311.98, 3316.57, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3316.574, "end": 3319.454, "text": "saying I don't kind of like to get in the conversation because I don't feel like I", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["saying I don't kind of like to get in the conversation because I don't feel like I", 3316.57, 3319.45, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3319.454, "end": 3323.934, "text": "understand EFT enough. Okay yeah. And I don't I'm happy to give you some ideas though but,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["understand EFT enough. Okay yeah. And I don't I'm happy to give you some ideas though but,", 3319.45, 3323.93, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3324.564, "end": 3330.974, "text": "just like sometimes I will critique sex addiction programs but I've learned I don't want to do that", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["just like sometimes I will critique sex addiction programs but I've learned I don't want to do that", 3324.56, 3330.97, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3330.974, "end": 3336.357, "text": "because some are very on point and very valuable. So what I do sometimes is I say,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["because some are very on point and very valuable. So what I do sometimes is I say,", 3330.97, 3336.36, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3336.582, "end": 3341.054, "text": "if a program is teaching you this idea, I think it's dangerous. If a program is teaching you this", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["if a program is teaching you this idea, I think it's dangerous. If a program is teaching you this", 3336.58, 3341.05, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3341.054, "end": 3345.134, "text": "idea, I think it's dangerous. So it's more like that. If it's teaching you this, it will be", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["idea, I think it's dangerous. So it's more like that. If it's teaching you this, it will be", 3341.05, 3345.13, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3345.134, "end": 3352.094, "text": "helpful in my view. But I think the fundamental... So first of all, Adam Miller and these were both", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["helpful in my view. But I think the fundamental... So first of all, Adam Miller and these were both", 3345.13, 3352.09, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3352.094, "end": 3356.174, "text": "people that happened to be in my ward and Hardy, I can't remember his first name right now.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["people that happened to be in my ward and Hardy, I can't remember his first name right now.", 3352.09, 3356.17, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3356.9, "end": 3363.174, "text": "They wrote, they co-authored, they're Northwestern students, and they co-authored a paper about", "confidence": 0.92, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["They wrote, they co-authored, they're Northwestern students, and they co-authored a paper about", 3356.9, 3363.17, 0.9168610572814941]]}, {"start": 3363.174, "end": 3369.306, "text": "really laying out the tenets of EFT and differentiation theory and kind of arguing.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["really laying out the tenets of EFT and differentiation theory and kind of arguing.", 3363.17, 3369.31, 0.9168610572814941]]}, {"start": 3369.774, "end": 3375.774, "text": "So it's very well written and well done and worth reading. Did I say Adam Miller? I mean Adam Fisher.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["So it's very well written and well done and worth reading.", 3369.77, 3373.77, 0.9168610572814941], ["Did I say Adam Miller?", 3374.11, 3374.77, 0.9168610572814941], ["I mean Adam Fisher.", 3374.77, 3375.77, 0.9168610572814941]]}, {"start": 3376.192, "end": 3381.585, "text": "Adam Fisher and Nathan Hardy. So that's worth reading.", "confidence": 0.92, "timestamps": [["Adam Fisher and Nathan Hardy.", 3376.19, 3379.65, 0.9168610572814941], ["So that's worth reading.", 3379.93, 3381.58, 0.9168610572814941]]}, {"start": 3382.014, "end": 3389.214, "text": "What I would say in my rudimentary understanding is the question of locus of control or where", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["What I would say in my rudimentary understanding is the question of locus of control or where", 3382.01, 3389.21, 0.9730964303016663]]}, {"start": 3389.214, "end": 3395.094, "text": "is the center of change in these models as they were originally understood.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["is the center of change in these models as they were originally understood.", 3389.21, 3395.09, 0.9730964303016663]]}, {"start": 3395.094, "end": 3405.324, "text": "Now how practitioners use them, it may be very different. Maybe EFT has shifted since its initial idea, but that's what I think is the core issue.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["Now how practitioners use them, it may be very different.", 3395.09, 3398.33, 0.9730964303016663], ["Maybe EFT has shifted since its initial idea, but that's what I think is the core issue.", 3398.33, 3405.32, 0.9730964303016663]]}, {"start": 3405.854, "end": 3415.714, "text": "In the EFT model, it's that we are attached, which we are. We attach at an early age, and then we have attachment styles, all of which I agree with.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["In the EFT model, it's that we are attached, which we are.", 3405.85, 3410.28, 0.9596602916717529], ["We attach at an early age, and then we have attachment styles, all of which I agree with.", 3410.47, 3415.71, 0.9596602916717529]]}, {"start": 3416.118, "end": 3420.492, "text": "But the idea of the model is often that change happens.", "confidence": 0.91, "timestamps": [["But the idea of the model is often that change happens.", 3416.12, 3420.49, 0.9103120565414429]]}, {"start": 3421.51, "end": 3427.12, "text": "Through the marriage by the partner being the attachment object that was needed.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Through the marriage by the partner being the attachment object that was needed.", 3421.51, 3427.12, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3427.802, "end": 3434.56, "text": "Right. So validating feelings, reflecting back, communicating in a certain way. And so the change,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Right. So validating feelings, reflecting back, communicating in a certain way. And so the change,", 3427.8, 3434.56, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3434.56, "end": 3439.6, "text": "the locus of control is in the partner. I see what you're saying. Yeah. Okay. Now I don't know,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["the locus of control is in the partner. I see what you're saying. Yeah. Okay. Now I don't know,", 3434.56, 3439.6, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3439.6, "end": 3442.96, "text": "you know, somebody might say, no, no, you don't get it. And I may not get it. So I'm not here to", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["you know, somebody might say, no, no, you don't get it. And I may not get it. So I'm not here to", 3439.6, 3442.96, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3443.142, "end": 3448.56, "text": "say like, I get it. And I know, I'm just saying that's my view from the first time I, you know,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["say like, I get it. And I know, I'm just saying that's my view from the first time I, you know,", 3443.14, 3448.56, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3448.56, "end": 3454.16, "text": "I read about it where in differentiation theory, yes, one attaches, no question.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I read about it where in differentiation theory, yes, one attaches, no question.", 3448.56, 3454.16, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3454.458, "end": 3456.72, "text": "And we attach and we do things in a certain way.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And we attach and we do things in a certain way.", 3454.46, 3456.72, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3457.393, "end": 3466.638, "text": "And not only do we attach, but we also so we not only do we want to be in relationship to others, we also want to be in relationship to ourselves.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And not only do we attach, but we also so we not only do we want to be", 3457.39, 3462.84, 1.0], ["in relationship to others, we also want to be in relationship to ourselves.", 3463.04, 3466.64, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3467.061, "end": 3474.52, "text": "And but the locus of change is within the self. Now, this is not to say that people don't affect our sense of self.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And but the locus of change is within the self.", 3467.06, 3470.72, 1.0], ["Now, this is not to say that people don't affect our sense of self.", 3470.92, 3474.52, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3474.72, "end": 3475.407, "text": "They deeply do.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["They deeply do.", 3474.72, 3475.41, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3475.767, "end": 3484.67, "text": "They're very, very entangled with other people. But what the change agent is helping people see how they are in relationship to others.", "confidence": 0.94, "timestamps": [["They're very, very entangled with other people.", 3475.77, 3478.2, 1.0], ["But what the change agent is helping people see how they are in relationship to others.", 3478.42, 3484.67, 0.8854230642318726]]}, {"start": 3485.228, "end": 3498.155, "text": "And how they're trying to have a self in relationship to others and the ways that that effort is creating trouble in their relationship to others and themselves and in that awakening to change.", "confidence": 0.89, "timestamps": [["And how they're trying to have a self in relationship to others and the ways that that effort is creating trouble in their relationship to others and themselves and in that awakening to change.", 3485.23, 3498.16, 0.8854230642318726]]}, {"start": 3499.055, "end": 3506.266, "text": "Change their behavior in relationship so the locus of full is within the self it's in the self regulation.", "confidence": 0.89, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Change their behavior in relationship so the locus of full is within the self it's in the self regulation.", 3499.06, 3506.27, 0.8854230642318726]]}, {"start": 3506.725, "end": 3511.56, "text": "And so it's just a different, it's helping people see more truthfully.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["And so it's just a different, it's helping people see more truthfully.", 3506.73, 3511.56, 0.9637458920478821]]}, {"start": 3511.749, "end": 3516.196, "text": "The problem I have with if it's in your partners, like you both have a half empty,", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["The problem I have with if it's in your partners, like you both have a half empty,", 3511.75, 3516.2, 0.9637458920478821]]}, {"start": 3516.88, "end": 3519.356, "text": "tank of gas and you're looking for the other one to fill it up, right?", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["tank of gas and you're looking for the other one to fill it up, right?", 3516.88, 3519.36, 0.9637458920478821]]}, {"start": 3519.82, "end": 3523.46, "text": "Because people are, your spouse doesn't have it to give usually.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["Because people are, your spouse doesn't have it to give usually.", 3519.82, 3523.46, 0.9637458920478821]]}, {"start": 3523.46, "end": 3527.02, "text": "Now I don't mean to say your spouse doesn't affect you and when they grow,", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["Now I don't mean to say your spouse doesn't affect you and when they grow,", 3523.46, 3527.02, 0.9637458920478821]]}, {"start": 3527.02, "end": 3529.38, "text": "it does positively impact you.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["it does positively impact you.", 3527.02, 3529.38, 0.9637458920478821]]}, {"start": 3529.564, "end": 3533.74, "text": "But a lot of times we're trying to like show forth love, make our spouse feel loved,", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["But a lot of times we're trying to like show forth love, make our spouse feel loved,", 3529.56, 3533.74, 0.9637458920478821]]}, {"start": 3533.74, "end": 3541.18, "text": "give them security and while it can help a little I think.", "confidence": 0.89, "timestamps": [["give them security and while it can help a little I think.", 3533.74, 3541.18, 0.8922997713088989]]}, {"start": 3539.971, "end": 3554.644, "text": "It's still got the focus in the wrong place now i don't know if this is how you have to therapy runs or how it is at this point but to the degree that that's the model operating in any therapy like a model therapy i think it's almost a hundred percent that.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["It's still got the focus in the wrong place now i don't know if this is how you have to therapy runs or how it is at this point but to the degree that that's the model operating in any therapy like a model therapy i think it's almost a hundred percent that.", 3539.97, 3554.64, 0.9005444645881653]]}, {"start": 3555.202, "end": 3560.01, "text": "And so the degree that it's doing that i think it's only minimally effectual.", "confidence": 0.9, "timestamps": [["And so the degree that it's doing that i think it's only minimally effectual.", 3555.2, 3560.01, 0.9005444645881653]]}, {"start": 3560.469, "end": 3563.921, "text": "And there can be things that are beneficial about a conversation style.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And there can be things that are beneficial about a conversation style.", 3560.47, 3563.92, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3563.921, "end": 3566.383, "text": "I'm just going to sit and validate what I can.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I'm just going to sit and validate what I can.", 3563.92, 3566.38, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3566.5, "end": 3572.521, "text": "I'm not saying that as a tool, there can't be some value in that idea for helping people", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I'm not saying that as a tool, there can't be some value in that idea for helping people", 3566.5, 3572.52, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3572.521, "end": 3575.313, "text": "to settle down, not react and just listen.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to settle down, not react and just listen.", 3572.52, 3575.31, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3576.041, "end": 3585.126, "text": "But I think as a kind of fundamental kind of model of change, I think it has some limitations. That's my...", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["But I think as a kind of fundamental kind of model of change, I think it has some limitations.", 3576.04, 3583.83, 1.0], ["That's my...", 3584.28, 3585.13, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3585.281, "end": 3591.241, "text": "No, Jennifer, I do love that. And there's a part of me that feels like, okay, I don't want to now throw my two cents", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["No, Jennifer, I do love that.", 3585.28, 3586.8, 1.0], ["And there's a part of me that feels like, okay, I don't want to now throw my two cents", 3586.8, 3591.24, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3591.241, "end": 3594.641, "text": "in but then I realize, oh, wait, we're on my podcast and my people, my people, that", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["in but then I realize, oh, wait, we're on my podcast and my people, my people, that", 3591.24, 3594.64, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3594.641, "end": 3599.881, "text": "sounds very egotistical, but the listeners are so, you know, I talk about my four pillars", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["sounds very egotistical, but the listeners are so, you know, I talk about my four pillars", 3594.64, 3599.88, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3599.881, "end": 3604.561, "text": "all the time and I actually feel very validated by that because I do feel like I look at and", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["all the time and I actually feel very validated by that because I do feel like I look at and", 3599.88, 3604.56, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3604.561, "end": 3609.481, "text": "I think you're actually right where I may not even know what EFT, I think I've slowly", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I think you're actually right where I may not even know what EFT, I think I've slowly", 3604.56, 3609.48, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3609.481, "end": 3612.361, "text": "morphed my own version of EFT into this.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["morphed my own version of EFT into this.", 3609.48, 3612.36, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3612.361, "end": 3617.121, "text": "So, you know, so yeah, right. And so, I feel like the model that then I use is it really", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["So, you know, so yeah, right. And so, I feel like the model that then I use is it really", 3612.36, 3617.12, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3617.121, "end": 3623.422, "text": "is almost as simple as someone expresses something to their partner and their partner then immediately,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["is almost as simple as someone expresses something to their partner and their partner then immediately,", 3617.12, 3623.42, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3623.989, "end": 3628.161, "text": "that has a meaning to them and they can be, they can take offense, they can, so I, you", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["that has a meaning to them and they can be, they can take offense, they can, so I, you", 3623.99, 3628.16, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3628.161, "end": 3632.361, "text": "know, my first pillar is assuming good intentions or there's a reason why somebody says what", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["know, my first pillar is assuming good intentions or there's a reason why somebody says what", 3628.16, 3632.36, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3632.361, "end": 3636.761, "text": "they do. And I feel like it's core is because that's the way that they express themselves", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["they do. And I feel like it's core is because that's the way that they express themselves", 3632.36, 3636.76, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3636.761, "end": 3640.157, "text": "or that's the way that they feel like they have to show up in order to be heard. And", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["or that's the way that they feel like they have to show up in order to be heard. And", 3636.76, 3640.16, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3640.481, "end": 3645.041, "text": "And then my second one is you can't tell that person they're wrong or I disagree, even if", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And then my second one is you can't tell that person they're wrong or I disagree, even if", 3640.48, 3645.04, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3645.041, "end": 3647.62, "text": "you think they're wrong and you disagree, because any of these are going to take the", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["you think they're wrong and you disagree, because any of these are going to take the", 3645.04, 3647.62, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3647.741, "end": 3649.195, "text": "conversation out into the weeds.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["conversation out into the weeds.", 3647.74, 3649.2, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3649.801, "end": 3652.721, "text": "And then my third pillar is, okay, I'm going to ask questions before I make comments.", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["And then my third pillar is, okay, I'm going to ask questions before I make comments.", 3649.8, 3652.72, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3652.721, "end": 3655.001, "text": "Well, tell me what that means for you. Help me understand.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Well, tell me what that means for you.", 3652.72, 3654.0, 1.0], ["Help me understand.", 3654.0, 3655.0, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3655.001, "end": 3656.901, "text": "And that's where that discomfort kicks in and some empathy.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And that's where that discomfort kicks in and some empathy.", 3655.0, 3656.9, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3657.321, "end": 3661.762, "text": "And then my fourth one, I say, stay present and you can't go into a victim mentality.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["And then my fourth one, I say, stay present and you can't go into a victim mentality.", 3657.32, 3661.76, 0.9657204747200012]]}, {"start": 3662.366, "end": 3665.576, "text": "Follow those first three pillars and then say, okay, no, you're right. I guess I'm a horrible", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Follow those first three pillars and then say, okay, no, you're right. I guess I'm a horrible", 3662.37, 3665.58, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3665.678, "end": 3669.976, "text": "piece of garbage. Don't think you're going to rescue me, right? And so, I do feel like I like", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["piece of garbage. Don't think you're going to rescue me, right? And so, I do feel like I like", 3665.68, 3669.98, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3669.976, "end": 3674.699, "text": "what you're saying because I feel like I'm trying to use it as a communication tool to stay present", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["what you're saying because I feel like I'm trying to use it as a communication tool to stay present", 3669.98, 3674.7, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3674.888, "end": 3680.136, "text": "so that then we can self-confront because I feel like it's too easy for the emotionally immature", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["so that then we can self-confront because I feel like it's too easy for the emotionally immature", 3674.89, 3680.14, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3680.136, "end": 3685.496, "text": "to take any conversation out into the weeds. And then they never get to accountability or", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["to take any conversation out into the weeds. And then they never get to accountability or", 3680.14, 3685.5, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3685.496, "end": 3689.656, "text": "self-confrontation. But I think as you're expressing that, why I feel validated is because", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["self-confrontation. But I think as you're expressing that, why I feel validated is because", 3685.5, 3689.66, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3689.656, "end": 3695.496, "text": "I actually think I have taken that off on a little bit of my own path. And so when I come in and say,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I actually think I have taken that off on a little bit of my own path. And so when I come in and say,", 3689.66, 3695.5, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3695.496, "end": 3699.576, "text": "oh, I hear people that talk about the differentiation model or then because I validate it,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["oh, I hear people that talk about the differentiation model or then because I validate it,", 3695.5, 3699.58, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3699.576, "end": 3704.056, "text": "and I feel like maybe they're waiting for me to say, that's dumb. You know, EFT is it. And I love", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and I feel like maybe they're waiting for me to say, that's dumb. You know, EFT is it. And I love", 3699.58, 3704.06, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3704.056, "end": 3708.776, "text": "your concept about the locus of change, because I think you're right. And maybe we're both wrong,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["your concept about the locus of change, because I think you're right. And maybe we're both wrong,", 3704.06, 3708.78, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3708.898, "end": 3710.936, "text": "but we're both right as well. And that sure feels good.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["but we're both right as well. And that sure feels good.", 3708.9, 3710.94, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3710.936, "end": 3717.176, "text": "Yeah. Well, and I do think communication models, for example, can be very helpful for just giving", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Yeah. Well, and I do think communication models, for example, can be very helpful for just giving", 3710.94, 3717.18, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3717.176, "end": 3723.176, "text": "people tools, something to kind of anchor their anxiety to as they're walking", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["people tools, something to kind of anchor their anxiety to as they're walking", 3717.18, 3723.18, 0.993353545665741]]}, {"start": 3723.176, "end": 3728.176, "text": "through a difficult conversation in my online, the strengthening your relationship course, I do the same thing.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["through a difficult conversation in my online, the strengthening your", 3723.18, 3726.6, 0.993353545665741], ["relationship course, I do the same thing.", 3726.6, 3728.18, 0.993353545665741]]}, {"start": 3728.361, "end": 3733.204, "text": "I'm giving them a communication model that is as anchored as I can make it in", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["I'm giving them a communication model that is as anchored as I can make it in", 3728.36, 3733.2, 0.993353545665741]]}, {"start": 3733.516, "end": 3737.456, "text": "their own integrity and self-confrontation before they even open their yap, you", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["their own integrity and self-confrontation before they even open their yap, you", 3733.52, 3737.46, 0.993353545665741]]}, {"start": 3737.456, "end": 3744.896, "text": "know, that they are dealing with themselves first, rather than trying to get theirself, their spouse to buy into a view that's not even true.", "confidence": 0.99, "timestamps": [["know, that they are dealing with themselves first, rather than trying to", 3737.46, 3740.96, 0.993353545665741], ["get theirself, their spouse to buy into a view that's not even true.", 3740.96, 3744.9, 0.993353545665741]]}, {"start": 3745.33, "end": 3754.296, "text": "However, one can do that model. So that's to say your model would work very well if it's two people who are really trying", "confidence": 0.97, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["However, one can do that model.", 3745.33, 3748.78, 0.9685980081558228], ["So that's to say your model would work very well if it's two people who are really trying", 3748.78, 3754.3, 0.9685980081558228]]}, {"start": 3754.296, "end": 3760.456, "text": "to deal honestly with themselves, be fair, and that model can just help them manage themselves", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["to deal honestly with themselves, be fair, and that model can just help them manage themselves", 3754.3, 3760.46, 0.9685980081558228]]}, {"start": 3760.456, "end": 3762.417, "text": "through so it can really be helpful.", "confidence": 0.97, "timestamps": [["through so it can really be helpful.", 3760.46, 3762.42, 0.9685980081558228]]}, {"start": 3763.496, "end": 3766.729, "text": "But what I think is that people can also use models, whether yours or mine.", "confidence": 0.96, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["But what I think is that people can also use models, whether yours or mine.", 3763.5, 3766.73, 0.9602593779563904]]}, {"start": 3767.647, "end": 3771.497, "text": "To not deal with themselves. You know what I mean? Like they can go through the,", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["To not deal with themselves. You know what I mean? Like they can go through the,", 3767.65, 3771.5, 0.9619269371032715]]}, {"start": 3772.377, "end": 3774.057, "text": "butter of the law, but not the spirit of the law.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["butter of the law, but not the spirit of the law.", 3772.38, 3774.06, 0.9619269371032715]]}, {"start": 3774.057, "end": 3778.617, "text": "Absolutely, I said they weaponized the tool and what's interesting then is in the, again,", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["Absolutely, I said they weaponized the tool and what's interesting then is in the, again,", 3774.06, 3778.62, 0.9619269371032715]]}, {"start": 3778.617, "end": 3782.537, "text": "I found myself working with a lot of emotionally immature or narcissistic,", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["I found myself working with a lot of emotionally immature or narcissistic,", 3778.62, 3782.54, 0.9619269371032715]]}, {"start": 3782.672, "end": 3787.257, "text": "traded and tendency people and surprise because I have a podcast that has narcissism in the name.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["traded and tendency people and surprise because I have a podcast that has narcissism in the name.", 3782.67, 3787.26, 0.9619269371032715]]}, {"start": 3787.257, "end": 3793.657, "text": "So I'm not shocked by that, but I feel like even the having a framework has allowed people to then", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["So I'm not shocked by that, but I feel like even the having a framework has allowed people to then", 3787.26, 3793.66, 0.9619269371032715]]}, {"start": 3793.657, "end": 3796.886, "text": "and see that the emotionally immature person can't play in the sandbox.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and see that the emotionally immature person", 3793.66, 3795.74, 1.0], ["can't play in the sandbox.", 3796.0, 3796.89, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3797.237, "end": 3800.577, "text": "That they're so special that when they tell me how crazy their wife is,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["That they're so special that when they tell me", 3797.24, 3799.44, 1.0], ["how crazy their wife is,", 3799.44, 3800.58, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3800.577, "end": 3804.937, "text": "even I will put away my beloved four pillars and now we will join in triangulation", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["even I will put away my beloved four pillars", 3800.58, 3802.9, 1.0], ["and now we will join in triangulation", 3803.45, 3804.94, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3804.937, "end": 3806.114, "text": "and let her know how bad she is.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and let her know how bad she is.", 3804.94, 3806.11, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3806.337, "end": 3809.657, "text": "And I feel like that's what you end up seeing, kind of back to what we were saying earlier", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["And I feel like that's what you end up seeing,", 3806.34, 3807.94, 1.0], ["kind of back to what we were saying earlier", 3808.3, 3809.66, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3809.657, "end": 3812.334, "text": "versus the person saying, oh my gosh, I didn't know what I didn't know.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["versus the person saying,", 3809.66, 3810.8, 1.0], ["oh my gosh, I didn't know what I didn't know.", 3810.88, 3812.33, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3812.658, "end": 3815.926, "text": "Here's a tool, let's use it. And then I do, I feel like that's the part where,", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Here's a tool, let's use it.", 3812.66, 3814.07, 1.0], ["And then I do, I feel like that's the part where,", 3814.18, 3815.93, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3816.417, "end": 3817.979, "text": "oh, and then it's both of the unicorns.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["oh, and then it's both of the unicorns.", 3816.42, 3817.98, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3818.177, "end": 3822.857, "text": "Our brains love to do that. I mean, we all do that. Just start using the words differentiation", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Our brains love to do that.", 3818.18, 3819.54, 1.0], ["I mean, we all do that.", 3819.54, 3820.67, 1.0], ["Just start using the words differentiation", 3820.74, 3822.86, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3822.857, "end": 3827.557, "text": "and self-regulation, you sound like you're really, you know, I know I love ideas too.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["and self-regulation, you sound like you're really,", 3822.86, 3825.92, 1.0], ["you know, I know I love ideas too.", 3826.04, 3827.56, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3827.557, "end": 3831.837, "text": "I'd much rather talk about ideas than actually go through the horrors of self-confrontation.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I'd much rather talk about ideas", 3827.56, 3828.98, 1.0], ["than actually go through the horrors of self-confrontation.", 3829.23, 3831.84, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3831.837, "end": 3832.897, "text": "I mean, who wants to do that?", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["I mean, who wants to do that?", 3831.84, 3832.9, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3833.13, "end": 3838.117, "text": "But, you know, I mean, right? So it's easy to talk about ideas.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["But, you know, I mean, right?", 3833.13, 3835.92, 1.0], ["So it's easy to talk about ideas.", 3835.92, 3838.12, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3838.117, "end": 3842.6, "text": "Christ talked about this. We love the letter of the law, spirit of the law is much harder.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Christ talked about this.", 3838.12, 3839.08, 1.0], ["We love the letter of the law,", 3839.08, 3841.04, 1.0], ["spirit of the law is much harder.", 3841.04, 3842.6, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3843.197, "end": 3843.671, "text": "Yeah, it is.", "confidence": 1.0, "timestamps": [["Yeah, it is.", 3843.2, 3843.67, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3844.31, "end": 3848.737, "text": "Yes, yeah, I love it. Man, Jennifer, okay, thank you. This was so fun because when we look back", "confidence": 1.0, "newpara": true, "timestamps": [["Yes, yeah, I love it.", 3844.31, 3845.24, 1.0], ["Man, Jennifer, okay, thank you.", 3845.24, 3846.76, 1.0], ["This was so fun because when we look back", 3846.76, 3848.74, 1.0]]}, {"start": 3848.737, "end": 3855.837, "text": "on today's interview, it was kind of ADD-like, which is, it was everything, which to me, that felt so satisfying.", "confidence": 0.98, "timestamps": [["on today's interview, it was kind of ADD-like,", 3848.74, 3851.84, 1.0], ["which is, it was everything, which to me, that felt so satisfying.", 3851.84, 3855.84, 0.9594256281852722]]}, {"start": 3855.837, "end": 3861.226, "text": "Right, very good for Nathan to bring that presenter. Exactly. So, thank you so much for meeting me where I'm at.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["Right, very good for Nathan to bring that presenter.", 3855.84, 3858.34, 0.9594256281852722], ["Exactly. So, thank you so much for meeting me where I'm at.", 3858.34, 3861.23, 0.9594256281852722]]}, {"start": 3861.337, "end": 3865.337, "text": "What a joy. And I just looked down, I can't even, I feel like it's been 30 minutes.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["What a joy. And I just looked down, I can't even, I feel like it's been 30 minutes.", 3861.34, 3865.34, 0.9594256281852722]]}, {"start": 3865.337, "end": 3869.625, "text": "And so, thank you and I would love to have you on. I'll do the research now on ADHD and relationships.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["And so, thank you and I would love to have you on.", 3865.34, 3867.14, 0.9594256281852722], ["I'll do the research now on ADHD and relationships.", 3867.14, 3869.62, 0.9594256281852722]]}, {"start": 3870.057, "end": 3872.253, "text": "And then, man, I would love to have you back on and talk about that too.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["And then, man, I would love to have you back on and talk about that too.", 3870.06, 3872.25, 0.9594256281852722]]}, {"start": 3873.424, "end": 3875.89, "text": "That would be fun. That would be good. Alright, thanks so much. It's always good to see you.", "confidence": 0.96, "timestamps": [["That would be fun.", 3873.42, 3873.12, 0.9594256281852722], ["That would be good.", 3873.42, 3873.85, 0.9594256281852722], ["Alright, thanks so much. It's always good to see you.", 3874.34, 3875.89, 0.9594256281852722]]}, {"start": 3876.052, "end": 3877.331, "text": "You're welcome. Okay, I'm taking a sec.", "confidence": 0.79, "timestamps": [["You're welcome.", 3876.05, 3876.84, 0.9594256281852722], ["Okay, I'm taking a sec.", 3876.84, 3877.33, 0.6288681030273438]]}, {"start": 3877.36, "end": 4077.845, "text": "Music.", "newpara": true}]