Natty Bumpercar: I'm so strange, so strange. So strange
yesterday, I kind of died a little bit, which is I know a
strange way to start a podcast, especially the bumper podcast,
by the way. Hello, everyone. This is Natty Bumpercar. And
this is the bumper podcast, your weekly jump into fun, Ray. And
so let's start it off with with that yesterday. Well, first of
all, so I don't know where anyone is here at the bumper
podcast. I haven't seen pig. I haven't seen Rufus. I haven't
seen producer and doodle poodle, anybody for weeks. And I come
in, and I just kind of click on record and it seems to be
working. I mean, the thing is, Do I even need producer? I don't
know, I honestly don't know. But that is not the question for
today. To question for today is what in the world happened
yesterday? What in the world? Well, I got up. And I took one
of the kids to school. And then I came home back to headquarters
here. And I had a little sip of water because water is good for
you in the morning. And then the one of the other one of the kids
had left, like a little glass of orange juice on the table, and
not very much at all. But I was like, oh, I'll just finish that.
Because as a parent, I'm a vulture, and I just go and I
finish off whatever the food is, it's left around. And then I
went upstairs and I was gonna go back to bed because I was tired.
And it was Monday. And on Mondays. Sometimes I pass out
because the weekends are so much fun. That's what it is. I'm so
tired from all the fun that weekends are. I used to love
weekends growing up. I remember man, I'd be like, Oh, I can't
wait for the weekend. Everybody's everybody's working
for the weekend. Here we go. It's Saturday morning. Whoo. I'm
gonna sleep in and then I'm gonna do fun stuff. And now it's
just like, oh, no, no, as a parent, the weekends got in the
way it gets here. Oh, no. And then Monday comes in. I'm tired.
But so I got into bed. And my hands were weirdly itchy. Like,
I was like, What is going on hands? Why are you so itchy. And
they were kind of dry. And so I was like, alright, I'll just go,
you know, like, put some lotion on him. And that'll that'll fix
that. And then I started to feel and this was happening pretty
rapidly. My my lip was feeling kind of weird. And it's like,
All right, well, let's go check it see. And so I went to the
bathroom, and I was I was looking for the lotion, and then
I shut the mirror. That's where it is. And I saw my face. And my
lip was gigantic, and purple. And my eyes like were swollen
almost to being shut and they were bright red. And then not
only was the rest of my face, very swollen. But I noticed that
my tongue swollen, my throat swollen and the breathing. The
breathing was not good. And so I I grabbed my rescue inhaler, and
I did the did that. Just hopefully I was like alright,
this will open up my airways. And then I was just like,
alright, calmly, calmly. Let's find the shoes. Let's make sure
we have all the stuff the wallet, the phone, the keys are
right. Where's the jacket? Perfect. Let's go downstairs.
Let's get to the car. Let's go to the closest urgent care and I
was doing this all as the everything was getting much
worse. Like the breathing was just like and the like the
tongue it was. I don't I don't like tongues. I don't like to
talk about tongues. I think they're weird and kind of gross.
But the tongue was a lot. It was a lot more than it's supposed to
be. And I also I couldn't talk and so really just around the
corner not I would say maybe is three quarters of a mile away
from the house is is an urgent care. There's one that's closer,
which is a CVS, but I looked on the thing and they were not open
yet. And so I went to the other one. And at a light, there's two
lights in between my house in this place. So at the second
light, it was red light. And so I texted my wife and I was just
like, Hi, I'm having an allergic reaction. We're going to urgent
care, period. That's all I saw at time, then the light turned
her send light green, off, we go to the urgent care, get to the
urgent care Park can't breathe, like really can't breathe,
stumble into the place, lumbar into the place. There's no one
there. And I look around. And I guess they heard me come in. And
so a woman came, you know, behind the desk, and her eyes
got enormous. And she said, can I please have your ID? And I was
just like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, because it couldn't talk.
I couldn't speak at all like, rules. No, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, is how I sounded. But worse than that. And then the
woman who there's another woman who kind of looked in and she
was like, get him back here now. And they got me back there sat
me in the chair and started taking doing my blood. What is
the oxygen levels and the thing around my arm to check my blood
pressure, and all these things? And it was great. But they were
running around like chickens. They were just running around in
circles, like, what do we do? What do we do? It's Monday
morning. This is the first guy that comes in what? It's not a
good way to start a week called labor ambulance call the man
ambulance quickly. And so the ambulance comes, but it took
them about, I want to say eight minutes. I don't know pretty
sure it could have died that eight minutes. And so they get
there. And they're like, should we do an EpiPen? Do we need to
do what have you been? And they're like, get them on the
stretcher. It was all very like, but do this. Gotta do this, get
into that. And I, they got me on the stretcher. And they were
asking all these questions. And they asked me to write down my
phone number because I couldn't say it. And I wrote mine. And
then I wrote my wife's number. And then I said, I was trying to
say hold on do you want me to call my wife but they couldn't
understand it because it came out like this rah rah, love,
love. And so I took my phone, they were like, We don't know
what you're saying. So I took my phone and I pressed the you
know, I was like call wife. And then I handed them the phone.
And then she got a call from a police officer. And you know,
when you get that call, it's scary. And so she you know, I
was talking to him about the situation what was going on?
Should she come back? And I was like, No, I got this, you know,
and then I get whisked to the ambulance. And they put an IV in
me and then it's Benadryl. And then things start to come down a
little bit. They were debating whether to do the epi pen or
not. And epi pen is like, the guy was telling me about it. And
I wish you wouldn't have it's a it's a tube with a giant needle,
he said, giant needle that they jam into your leg and then, you
know, like, whatever. And it's what they do. When I guess
you're going into anaphylaxis, which is not good thing. So
they, they were going to wait until we got to the emergency
room because they were kind of monitoring everything. And I was
I still somehow was getting oxygen. Even though I the
breathing was just like wow, right, very rapid. And we got to
the emergency room on the thing, and then they get me in there
and then they start pumping me full of all kinds of other
stuff. And you know, I was plugged in, I've got tubes, I've
got things in my fingers things. There was this a lot. And I
ended up being at the hospital for like 10 hours. And because
they it was it wouldn't the swelling wouldn't go down. Like
it was very slow, like, my face would get a little bit better.
And I realized that about like, three o'clock that I hadn't
eaten anything since pretty much five o'clock the last day and I
was just like and they're like, What, and that's because
everybody was like What What are you saying what? I'm sure. And
they were like, oh food. We have two two sandwiches. I was like,
oh, not and they gay and then I just like everyone, Apple car
or, or yoga. And they're like, ah, applesauce, we can give you
applesauce and I was like oh Huh.
And I'm texting, you know, people updates. This is what's
happening. This is where I am, this is what's going on yada,
yada. I'll give you updates as I have them. Yeah, and one of the
annoying things was I couldn't go to the bathroom because of
these things tied into me. But eventually I was I was like, I
was like, the bathroom. And they were like, okay, hold on, well,
unclick you unclick I click, I click. And she's like, okay,
it's doors right down there. And, and I started walking out
of the room. They asked me if I could and I said yes. And I got
like two feet out of the room, they had forgotten to unplug,
like, some major thing. And it knocked me back. And it almost,
and the equipment, like almost fell over. And like, so everyone
in the emergency room was like, gasp it says everything. Okay?
And I was just like, they were like, Oh, we're sorry. And then
I, you know, I use bathroom. And then like, a couple hours later,
things were down enough. My face was okay. And they were like,
Okay, you seem good. Okay, called the wife. She and the
kids came and got me. And I Yeah, you know, it's better. Now
I was given all kinds of medicine, I'm going to see an
allergist, see what happened. And because it was very random,
and the only thing that we could figure out was it was this
orange juice, because that was all I had. And we were looking
at the bottle and it was orange juice that had calcium in it.
And then I started researching, and it seems like calcium
citrate or calcium phosphate, or some of the things that they put
into the orange juice that I maybe had a bad reaction to. And
so it was a pretty fun day, pretty much everyone thought
that I was going to be dead or die or whatever. And my main
fear was that they were going to intubate me. So put like a tube
in my throat so that I could breathe, because then my fear
was, well what is my voice sound like? Like, how is this going to
impact how my voice sounds which I use my voice for a lot of
things, talking being one of them, but now it's all fixed
except for the cleanup and the tears.
Outro: The bumper podcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp
with Natty Bumpercar and some of his pals. It is family friendly,
clean and ridiculous. Thanks a bundle for listening. If you
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