Natty Bumpercar: All right. Hey, how does work for the podcast
like in normal life? If you're near someone and then they yawn,
then for some reason, I don't know what you but you yawn as
well. I do. I don't know if you do. I think you do. Do you? Why
is that? It's like a yawn response. Like, why are we why
are we triggered? I'm just I'm glad doesn't happen when we
sneeze, like one person sneezes, and then the whole table
sneezing? That'd be terrible. But yawning, that's weird to
like, why? Anyway, I apologize. I didn't mean to yawn. This is
Natty Bumpercar. And this is a bumper podcast I I had been out
and about and I, you know, I'm, I'm working on the show here. Go
into the different the different countries where the bumper
podcast is on the charts. It's actually we were we've made it
to the charts. And, you know, talking to people, oh, they
said, you need a theme song. Gotta go get a theme song. I was
just like, ah, we okay, we'll get a theme song. And then
they're like, you know, you got to do everybody don't have an
opinion, you know what you got to do? And I was just like, I
don't know, what's, what am I supposed to do? And then they
tell me all these things. And I, at some point, while they're
speaking, my eyes kind of glaze over. And my brain goes to
another place. And if I'm to be completely honest, I don't know
what they've said to me. But I'm sure they've given me great
advice. And then I feel guilty, because these people have given
their time to try to tell me, you know, get to help me to tell
me what to do. And then I don't even listen. How ungrateful is
that? Tremendously ungrateful? Huh? Well, else is going on.
I've been working on the railroad, like, Oh, my live long
days. But mostly, I've been working on the railroad, just
just to pass the time away. Because I'm not busy enough. I I
like to I like to I have a therapist, I was talking to my
therapist about. She said, You seem overwhelmed. seem like
you're taking too much stuff on I was just like, Yeah. And she's
like, but you I know you like to do that. And you told me that,
you know, as long as you're feeling okay, then that's okay.
Are you feeling okay? And I was like, No. And so then she was
like, well, then you need to take some stuff off of your
plate, and stop doing as much stuff. And I was just like,
Okay, that sounds good. And practice, those are good words,
have no idea how to actually make that happen. And then she
said, Well, your session is over, and come back in a couple
of weeks. And by that time, either, you will have figured it
out. Or we can work on it then, or knowing you, you're probably
gonna start three more companies and take on 16 more impossible
tasks. And I was just like, all right, that sounds like a
challenge. That's your it seems like you're saying, Can you do
these things? And I'm going to tell you right now, yes, I can.
I can. I can do all those things. And I'm here to tell you
a bumper podcast I've I've succeeded in doing that. I am
quite proud of myself. And I feel like you should be quite
proud of me as well. Because I have managed to, not only not
complete, not finish any projects, but I have managed to
actually take more projects on. It's very impressive. It's my
superpower. Really, if I had to, you know, figure that I have a
superpower I think it's going to be that I just continually add
on to the pile it's almost like a weighted blanket. It's not you
know, it's like oh, the world is so nice and calm it's not but
you know, just for the sake of this relaxing the world of this
world. Oh spring its spring again. It's not Oh, look out.
The weather's beautiful and my I've had a nice meal again. You
don't haven't really eaten today, but that's my fault.
There's not any reason other than me. Okay, Oh, perfect.
Everything great. Oh, Ah, you know, and then you go, you know
what I'm going to do? I'm not going to take on all a lot of
projects, I'm going to take on the appropriate amount of
projects, which is not because life itself is a project, taking
care of the kids having the job taking care of the dogs, these
are all projects, making sure that the car is working
properly, making sure that you know, there's just there's in
life, there's this massive list, it seems of things you can't get
away from. And you know, those are big responsibility. And make
sure the kids brush their teeth. Did they? Do they floss their
teeth? Oh, I don't know. Look, that one's already asleep. How
do I get him to brush his teeth when he's already asleep? So
then, why in the world? Would I go and look for more things,
more responsibilities to add on to the file? Now? I don't know.
I don't know. I mean, I'm, I'm, I'm asking you a question.
Because I don't know the answer. And I wish I did. Sometimes, I
think that what I do, and maybe we've talked about this before,
I honestly don't remember, and I apologize for that. But what I
like to do is if I just keep adding more stuff on to my
weighted blanket of life, then well, I don't know what I think
is gonna happen with what ends up happening is the weighted
blanket gets so heavy with all the responsibilities that I
can't move. And then you know what I do? I sleep under the
weighted blanket, it's very warm. I must say. The dogs love
it, because I'm not moving so they can just curl right up to
me. I had no idea like, I've had dogs before, but I had no idea
how much the dogs that they'd like to sleep. Like, that's all
they do really asleep. All right, come for podcast. I don't
know if you've ever been in the middle of recording a really
great episode of your podcast, which I understand is not what
we were doing a second ago there. But let's say that I was
recording a really good episode of the podcast. And you know,
you're just really moving and you're talking and you're saying
things and you're like, Yeah, this feels great. And then your
kid bursts in and says, Hey, stop talking to your computer.
And I'm just like, oh, that really, really boils it down,
doesn't it? That really hurts. Stop talking to your computer,
dad. Ouch. Ha. Because I mean, I mean, in essence, that's all I'm
doing really is I'm talking. I mean, I'm looking at a computer.
I'm talking into a microphone. And, you know, I have I have
headphones on so that, you know, there's there's, you know,
there's a few things that are going on. But I felt like he had
gotten me good enough that there was no reason for me to, to try
to retort to try to try to come back. He had beaten me down as
only your children can. What was I talking about? It is that's
the thing. This was yesterday. And now it's today. And I I
don't know. I? I wasn't ready to you know, I yesterday, I ate
oatmeal for breakfast. And today, I ate grits. grits are
just little tiny bits of corn. And there were some cheese in it
and some pepper and a little bit of garlic salt. If I'm to be
completely honest, maybe maybe some cheese, maybe maybe more
cheese than I intended. But you know, that's how cheese works.
And they say how much cheese would you like on this year,
like, keep going and then it's always just a little bit more
than you anticipated or wanted. And that's fine. It's a good
problem to have. It's different than like gasoline in your car.
Right with cheese. They say how much do you get like, fill it
up? Keep going. Let's go. And they're like, What does fill it
up mean with cheese? And you're like, I don't know, but we're on
this journey together. Let's see what happens. So you know, if
you do that at a gas station, you're filling your car up and
we're like, what did you What do you want? You're like, fill it
up and they're like, Okay, no problem and then they do and
then you know the little gas handle thing goes click one
because that means it's full. It's registered that the car is
full and gas and you're like, you know what, let's keep going
there. You can't because then the gas spills everywhere and
And then you know, it's a fire hazard. Cheese, not so much. The
only hazard that Jesus is a fun hazard
for maj hazard. I don't know what it is. So anyway, you know,
I think I was saying something about the dogs being lazy. I
don't know why I think that but I, this is kind of always on my
mind how lazy the dogs are, the only time the dogs get up. And
this is nice of them is when they have to use the restroom,
which is what we call our back yard now because that's, you
know, what happens back there. It's it's, and they get up when
they when they're hungry. And they get up to, to bark,
sometimes to shake, you know, a lot of shaking going on. Little
ear scratching, that's gonna it's gonna happen probably two
or three in the morning. Which is I think why they sleep all
the time. I think the dogs sleep all the time, because they don't
just sleep through the night. And they don't let me sleep
through the night. And I think that the message they're trying
to tell me is, hey, you know what, why don't you just hop on
our schedule here and curl up into a ball, find one ray of
sunshine, curl up in that little ray of sunshine, and pretend
that it's really warming you up? It's not, but you can pretend it
is. My assumption is that my dogs have very good imagination,
and that they can really, you're like, Yep, this is it's woof,
the sun is really giving it to me here. It's kind of like when
the door opens. And there's a couple of birds in the backyard.
And they run over to what I can only assume is to talk to the
birds. Let them know hey, what's going on? I haven't seen in a
while ah, spring is coming up. But then do the birds always fly
off because they don't want any part of that conversation.
Right? I don't know. I would love to have that conversation.
I would love for spring to be here. Because you know what
happens when when spring rolls around? Well, I get to sleep
better because the time change is nice. There's sun and there's
vitamins. And the most important thing of all, and I think you're
gonna agree with me then this thing here but Bob louder is
that there's a lot of cheese
Outro: the bumper podcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp
with Natty Bumpercar and some of his pals. It is family friendly,
clean and ridiculous. Thanks a bundle for listening. If you
love our show, and you'd like to help support the podcast, check
out our Patreon page at https colon forward slash forward
slash www.patreon.com forward slash Natty Bumpercar also
pretty please subscribe wherever you get your podcasts, share it
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medias or leave a rating and review. The bumper podcast is
produced at headquarters in coffee Ken alley. It's recorded
mixed and produced by producer. The bumper podcast features
contributions from Aloysius jpg Rufus T Rufus doodle poodle,
robot trunks and a gaggle of other silly rascals. Our head
talker is probably Natty Bumpercar. We also have an
absurd newsletter. Check it out and subscribe at Natty
bumpercar.com/subscribe Also, you can follow me on Instagram
and Twitter at Natty Bumpercar Hugs and hire. See you soon.
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