1 00:00:00,105 --> 00:00:00,145 - 2 00:00:06,455 --> 00:00:09,465 - Welcome to Balancing Life's Issues, the podcast. 3 00:00:10,165 --> 00:00:11,945 My name is Kai. I'm your host today, 4 00:00:11,945 --> 00:00:15,105 and I'm here with, as always, CEO, balancing life's issues. 5 00:00:15,105 --> 00:00:16,585 Wendy Wollner, how are you? Good, thank 6 00:00:16,585 --> 00:00:17,585 - You. 7 00:00:17,585 --> 00:00:17,665 How are you? 8 00:00:18,205 --> 00:00:20,345 - I'm good. And today we're going to do a little bit 9 00:00:20,345 --> 00:00:22,945 of a preview of a free live webinar 10 00:00:23,015 --> 00:00:24,665 that you're gonna do this Friday, 11 00:00:24,665 --> 00:00:26,425 January 26th at one Eastern. 12 00:00:26,485 --> 00:00:28,585 And you can register for that by going 13 00:00:28,585 --> 00:00:32,025 to bli info.com/free webinars. 14 00:00:32,205 --> 00:00:34,465 But before we jump into the five buckets, Wendy, 15 00:00:34,545 --> 00:00:35,785 I know you're fired up about something. 16 00:00:35,895 --> 00:00:38,225 Damn. Can you, can you tell me about what's going on? 17 00:00:38,385 --> 00:00:39,905 - I mean, we've got a lot going on in the world, 18 00:00:40,005 --> 00:00:41,385 but let's just stop for a second 19 00:00:41,525 --> 00:00:45,185 and say, you know, you get a call as a CEO 20 00:00:45,485 --> 00:00:48,745 and it's from an employee saying that your brand new baby 21 00:00:48,775 --> 00:00:49,985 that happens to be adopted, 22 00:00:50,075 --> 00:00:52,025 which I don't really even know is relevant. 23 00:00:52,085 --> 00:00:54,505 But, you know, I think there's an extra layer maybe 24 00:00:54,525 --> 00:00:57,825 of anxiety, um, that we wanna be mindful about. 25 00:00:57,885 --> 00:00:58,985 Mm-Hmm. and they need 26 00:00:58,985 --> 00:01:01,585 to spend some time in the, uh, in the hospital. 27 00:01:02,085 --> 00:01:04,425 And would it be okay if you work from the hospital? 28 00:01:05,005 --> 00:01:06,865 To me, I would put this in the no brainer. 29 00:01:07,165 --> 00:01:09,185 Um, sure. No brainer. Right? 30 00:01:09,575 --> 00:01:11,665 - Yeah. As a mother, um, as someone, 31 00:01:11,875 --> 00:01:13,105 brand new father over here. 32 00:01:13,195 --> 00:01:16,145 Right. There's certainly a lot of empathy around that. 33 00:01:16,415 --> 00:01:18,265 - Yeah. And, and one would assume, 34 00:01:18,525 --> 00:01:20,705 and this is where I think we're gonna learn that 35 00:01:20,705 --> 00:01:23,305 that isn't something we have to be trained to answer. 36 00:01:23,485 --> 00:01:25,825 But as we learn today, the CEO said no. 37 00:01:26,245 --> 00:01:28,065 And of course there's tremendous backlash. 38 00:01:28,245 --> 00:01:33,145 But one thing that it reminds me of my mission is that, um, 39 00:01:34,045 --> 00:01:36,025 we can't assume that people understand 40 00:01:36,075 --> 00:01:37,105 right and wrong choices. 41 00:01:37,645 --> 00:01:40,505 Um Mm-Hmm. . And they, we need to teach it. 42 00:01:40,605 --> 00:01:42,865 We need to delve into it. Yeah. We need to learn it. 43 00:01:42,935 --> 00:01:45,305 Harvard Business School, you always get a case study. 44 00:01:45,405 --> 00:01:46,705 So here's the case study, 45 00:01:47,125 --> 00:01:49,625 - Here's the case study, and just if our listeners just get 46 00:01:49,745 --> 00:01:52,585 'em caught up real quick, it was the CEO of Kite baby, 47 00:01:52,585 --> 00:01:54,545 which is a clothing company that denied 48 00:01:55,085 --> 00:01:58,665 the work from home request for the mother, uh, who wanted 49 00:01:58,665 --> 00:02:01,465 to take care of their adopted baby in the nicu 50 00:02:01,735 --> 00:02:03,865 that was nine hours away from their home. 51 00:02:03,965 --> 00:02:06,945 And that's the reason for the remote request. Right. 52 00:02:07,085 --> 00:02:08,825 And so there was a lot of backlash, 53 00:02:08,845 --> 00:02:11,345 and then there was a lot of fumbling apologies. 54 00:02:11,645 --> 00:02:15,185 And it's just kind of like, uh, just leaves you 55 00:02:15,185 --> 00:02:16,465 with a sick feeling in your stomach. 56 00:02:16,605 --> 00:02:18,225 And to me, and I don't know if you speak 57 00:02:18,225 --> 00:02:20,185 to this a little bit, it's this idea of like, 58 00:02:20,235 --> 00:02:21,585 brand not walking the walk. 59 00:02:21,655 --> 00:02:25,665 This is a baby company, you know? Um, I 60 00:02:25,665 --> 00:02:27,785 - Think it goes to really at the core that we should, 61 00:02:27,805 --> 00:02:29,265 and I'm not looking to the government, 62 00:02:29,325 --> 00:02:30,825 by the way, just to be clear. 63 00:02:31,025 --> 00:02:32,265 I know people are all over. Well, 64 00:02:32,265 --> 00:02:33,785 that's a parental leave issue. 65 00:02:33,845 --> 00:02:36,705 And, and, and, um, you know, I I, I try not 66 00:02:36,705 --> 00:02:38,225 to get too political, but I'm not looking 67 00:02:38,225 --> 00:02:39,585 for the government to solve this problem. 68 00:02:39,585 --> 00:02:40,945 Mm-Hmm. , I'm looking for corporate 69 00:02:40,945 --> 00:02:42,265 America to step up to the plate. 70 00:02:42,265 --> 00:02:44,905 Right? I, I'm really looking for us to say, what, 71 00:02:45,205 --> 00:02:47,105 how do we make our world? 72 00:02:47,405 --> 00:02:50,105 And, and I think one of the things that's interesting is 73 00:02:50,105 --> 00:02:53,265 that the CEO, um, needs to work. 74 00:02:53,455 --> 00:02:54,665 They need to take our classes. 75 00:02:55,005 --> 00:02:56,545 And I mean that as, as, right. 76 00:02:56,545 --> 00:02:59,565 They need to understand that they are not trained to think 77 00:02:59,585 --> 00:03:02,605 of what do I need in order to keep the employee happy, 78 00:03:02,705 --> 00:03:03,925 to keep the baby happy, 79 00:03:03,925 --> 00:03:06,445 because by the way, uh, you know, this, you, 80 00:03:06,465 --> 00:03:10,165 you saw the separation miles feels, I mean, that baby needs 81 00:03:10,845 --> 00:03:11,885 a parent caregiver. 82 00:03:12,445 --> 00:03:14,325 - Absolutely. And, and I think what, what you're speaking 83 00:03:14,325 --> 00:03:15,645 to is that the denial 84 00:03:15,665 --> 00:03:17,485 of the request wasn't technically illegal. 85 00:03:17,505 --> 00:03:19,685 Oh, right. And you're, we're not, we're not asking, 86 00:03:20,425 --> 00:03:25,125 you know, but, so it is this idea of, of morality ethics, 87 00:03:25,705 --> 00:03:27,165 what's right, what is wrong, 88 00:03:27,185 --> 00:03:29,445 and this feels like pretty black and white. 89 00:03:30,185 --> 00:03:32,005 You gotta, you gotta let that request go 90 00:03:32,005 --> 00:03:33,085 through, you know, what are we 91 00:03:33,245 --> 00:03:34,245 - Learning? 92 00:03:34,245 --> 00:03:35,285 That's even more the reason. 93 00:03:35,745 --> 00:03:37,805 If you haven't taken a work-life balance class, 94 00:03:37,835 --> 00:03:40,005 certainly I hope you take ours, but take one, 95 00:03:40,005 --> 00:03:41,445 because clearly we need it. 96 00:03:41,875 --> 00:03:44,525 - Yeah, absolutely. So, you know, we're gonna get there. 97 00:03:44,545 --> 00:03:47,605 And I know your time is limited, but quick fire. 98 00:03:47,715 --> 00:03:48,885 What should the CEO done? 99 00:03:48,985 --> 00:03:50,565 - You know, look, I'd like to say 100 00:03:50,565 --> 00:03:52,285 that it would be instinct, right? 101 00:03:52,345 --> 00:03:53,925 And it would've been, of course, no problem. 102 00:03:53,925 --> 00:03:55,045 What else do you need? 103 00:03:55,105 --> 00:03:56,285 And then let's send a basket 104 00:03:56,345 --> 00:03:58,365 of stuff along the way so you have food, right? 105 00:03:58,385 --> 00:03:59,925 Mm-Hmm, , that's the right answer. 106 00:03:59,985 --> 00:04:01,125 That's the platinum answer. 107 00:04:01,625 --> 00:04:04,285 But I think for some people, it might be okay to say, 108 00:04:04,445 --> 00:04:05,965 I need a minute to process this. 109 00:04:06,095 --> 00:04:08,485 Maybe that EO that was so out of their comfort zone 110 00:04:08,755 --> 00:04:10,565 that they really didn't know the right thing to do. 111 00:04:11,065 --> 00:04:13,325 And sometimes that's okay, let me hit a pause button 112 00:04:13,385 --> 00:04:14,445 and let me phone a friend. 113 00:04:14,745 --> 00:04:17,405 Let me have my advisor. Right? I I would be okay with that. 114 00:04:17,405 --> 00:04:20,125 Sure. Maybe he really, he, they did not know the right thing 115 00:04:20,125 --> 00:04:23,285 to do, but you don't do what they did. 116 00:04:23,755 --> 00:04:24,925 - Yeah, absolutely. 117 00:04:25,305 --> 00:04:27,725 So, you know, insert balancing life's issues here. 118 00:04:28,275 --> 00:04:31,765 Take a class CEO so that you have the tools Yep. 119 00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:34,645 To be able to react appropriately, even if 120 00:04:34,645 --> 00:04:36,685 that tool is take a second. 121 00:04:36,785 --> 00:04:38,605 Yep. And, and sit on it. Okay. 122 00:04:38,605 --> 00:04:40,085 So let's move to the other side of the coin. 123 00:04:40,355 --> 00:04:42,445 What should, what does the employee do in that moment? 124 00:04:42,825 --> 00:04:45,525 - So, you know, we had this pretty big debate about this, 125 00:04:45,585 --> 00:04:46,685 and, and I know what I'm about 126 00:04:46,685 --> 00:04:48,085 to say is a little bit shocking, 127 00:04:48,345 --> 00:04:52,965 but, um, I am, I, I feel very strongly that we have choices. 128 00:04:53,745 --> 00:04:56,125 And the minute that you crack a foundational value, 129 00:04:56,265 --> 00:04:57,605 the minute you work for a company 130 00:04:57,995 --> 00:05:01,165 that is clearly not allowed, aligned in values, right? 131 00:05:01,165 --> 00:05:03,685 This is not a family friendly, um, Mm-Hmm. . 132 00:05:03,745 --> 00:05:06,925 And I would say, you know, even as shocking as is if my dog, 133 00:05:07,345 --> 00:05:10,245 uh, you know, needed to have treatment, I love my dog, 134 00:05:10,425 --> 00:05:12,565 you know, I would want to be supported by that. 135 00:05:13,185 --> 00:05:15,685 Um, and so I believe that the employee 136 00:05:15,865 --> 00:05:18,925 and all the employees should find other employment. 137 00:05:19,325 --> 00:05:21,125 I think we need to step up to the plate 138 00:05:21,545 --> 00:05:23,045 and we work for companies 139 00:05:23,045 --> 00:05:25,925 that are ethically value no matter what. 140 00:05:26,995 --> 00:05:28,205 - Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. 141 00:05:28,205 --> 00:05:29,765 And it kind of goes back to this idea of, 142 00:05:29,765 --> 00:05:33,445 of value-based work, um, value-based day-to-Day. 143 00:05:33,905 --> 00:05:36,765 And, you know, speaking of this idea, 144 00:05:36,915 --> 00:05:39,205 it's your flagship program that we're delivering 145 00:05:39,205 --> 00:05:43,165 for free on Friday that I'll be hosting, um, to once again, 146 00:05:43,625 --> 00:05:45,125 uh, bring this discussion to the table. 147 00:05:45,185 --> 00:05:46,925 But it's this idea of the five buckets 148 00:05:46,955 --> 00:05:48,965 that you've trademarked, and really, 149 00:05:48,985 --> 00:05:51,085 you say it all the time, we can have it all. 150 00:05:51,345 --> 00:05:52,965 So how can we have it all? 151 00:05:53,265 --> 00:05:54,965 - We can have it all. We're having it all right now. 152 00:05:55,025 --> 00:05:56,485 So there's a lot of messiness. 153 00:05:56,585 --> 00:06:01,085 So it's really valuing the idea that every day of our lives 154 00:06:01,615 --> 00:06:03,765 we're valuing our work bucket, our brain, 155 00:06:03,815 --> 00:06:07,045 we're valuing the people in our lives, um, our family, 156 00:06:07,225 --> 00:06:08,685 our friends, our neighbors. 157 00:06:08,685 --> 00:06:11,325 Mm-Hmm. , we're valuing our financial, right? 158 00:06:11,375 --> 00:06:13,245 We're, we're taking care of, you know, 159 00:06:13,245 --> 00:06:14,805 our financial literacy. 160 00:06:15,015 --> 00:06:16,845 We're taking care of our health. 161 00:06:17,055 --> 00:06:19,525 We've gone for the meditation, the run. 162 00:06:19,765 --> 00:06:22,405 I know you do a mindful journal, um, yoga. 163 00:06:22,945 --> 00:06:25,525 And the last one is that we're being a good person 164 00:06:26,145 --> 00:06:27,765 and we're not doing it once in a while. 165 00:06:27,905 --> 00:06:31,605 That's my to-do list every day, every 166 00:06:31,745 --> 00:06:32,745 - Day, every day. 167 00:06:33,025 --> 00:06:34,805 And the challenge is how can we, 168 00:06:34,865 --> 00:06:37,805 how can we throughout the day just fill up those buckets 169 00:06:38,335 --> 00:06:39,525 every once in a while, right? 170 00:06:39,585 --> 00:06:42,245 Or, or is it all about let's do all my health in the morning 171 00:06:42,265 --> 00:06:44,205 and then I'm gonna do all my finance in the afternoon 172 00:06:44,225 --> 00:06:45,245 and then at night as family? 173 00:06:45,305 --> 00:06:46,645 Or like, how should we be thinking about 174 00:06:46,645 --> 00:06:47,645 - That? 175 00:06:47,645 --> 00:06:48,485 Know, I again, I, I think that sounds nice. 176 00:06:48,865 --> 00:06:51,405 Um, and, and that always sounds orderly, especially 177 00:06:51,425 --> 00:06:53,325 for someone like you who's a little bit more 178 00:06:53,325 --> 00:06:56,405 of the perfectionist, and I wanna check it off and, 179 00:06:56,705 --> 00:06:58,845 but as you'll see, as your family grows 180 00:06:58,845 --> 00:06:59,965 and life gets very messy, 181 00:07:00,355 --> 00:07:02,245 they often do come at the same moment. 182 00:07:02,665 --> 00:07:03,845 And, you know. Right. 183 00:07:04,065 --> 00:07:07,965 So that idea of, I just did a, a meeting with a client 184 00:07:07,965 --> 00:07:09,485 who hadn't gotten their exercise in, 185 00:07:09,485 --> 00:07:11,245 so they took me on their walking 186 00:07:11,245 --> 00:07:12,765 meeting. 'cause that's real world. 187 00:07:13,675 --> 00:07:15,285 - Yeah. Absolute. I - Wanna normalize that. 188 00:07:15,335 --> 00:07:18,005 Bring your baby to work, not just once a year all the time. 189 00:07:18,135 --> 00:07:21,165 Bring your dog right. Let it bark. Like, you know. Mm-Hmm. 190 00:07:21,205 --> 00:07:22,285 . I, I think there's a way 191 00:07:22,285 --> 00:07:25,285 to be perfectly imperfect and it's a mess. Yes. 192 00:07:25,755 --> 00:07:27,125 - Yeah. Yeah. And, you know, 193 00:07:27,125 --> 00:07:30,685 and I think it's gonna encourage, um, you know, the, 194 00:07:30,685 --> 00:07:32,365 these different generations of workforce 195 00:07:32,475 --> 00:07:34,205 that we're in right now, um, 196 00:07:34,465 --> 00:07:37,405 as one workforce is leaving into retirement, uh, 197 00:07:37,405 --> 00:07:39,045 another one is taking the realm 198 00:07:39,145 --> 00:07:40,885 or taking the reins and leadership. 199 00:07:40,905 --> 00:07:44,565 And then you have a younger generation coming in who kind 200 00:07:44,565 --> 00:07:45,525 of, I feel like they want to 201 00:07:45,525 --> 00:07:46,685 see those kinds of things, right. 202 00:07:46,685 --> 00:07:48,085 They wanna see that flexibility. 203 00:07:48,285 --> 00:07:51,565 They wanna see, see the, the importance that you 204 00:07:51,565 --> 00:07:54,485 as a CEO is putting on these buckets, you know? 205 00:07:54,505 --> 00:07:57,805 And then you can show up to work as yourself, 206 00:07:58,145 --> 00:07:59,285 not somebody who's at work 207 00:07:59,305 --> 00:08:00,925 and then at somebody who's at home. Right? 208 00:08:00,925 --> 00:08:02,445 - Yeah. And, and you know, I think one 209 00:08:02,445 --> 00:08:04,925 of the things is going back to is the job getting done 210 00:08:04,925 --> 00:08:06,285 because that's super important. 211 00:08:06,785 --> 00:08:07,925 Um, you know Mm-Hmm. 212 00:08:07,965 --> 00:08:09,445 , we run a real serious company 213 00:08:09,465 --> 00:08:11,165 and we work with Fortune five clients 214 00:08:11,385 --> 00:08:13,245 and you know, we get our jobs done 215 00:08:13,265 --> 00:08:15,085 and we don't do it on time, we do it early 216 00:08:15,145 --> 00:08:16,725 and we deliver stellar service. 217 00:08:17,545 --> 00:08:21,205 Um, so it's not about compromising that piece of it, 218 00:08:21,665 --> 00:08:25,405 but at the, at the same token, it's being very mindful 219 00:08:25,835 --> 00:08:28,685 that we are not missing out on things that are key to 220 00:08:28,705 --> 00:08:31,365 who we are and who and who we should be. 221 00:08:31,865 --> 00:08:33,445 And we're also not lying about it. 222 00:08:33,505 --> 00:08:35,005 You know, quick thing is, years 223 00:08:35,005 --> 00:08:37,485 and years ago, everybody took Thanksgiving the 224 00:08:37,485 --> 00:08:39,085 day after Thanksgiving off. Really? 225 00:08:39,095 --> 00:08:40,845 - Those were all - Like me. Everyone did. 226 00:08:40,865 --> 00:08:42,205 But they lied. Well, 227 00:08:42,235 --> 00:08:43,125 - They were sick. Yeah, 228 00:08:43,125 --> 00:08:44,125 - They were sick. 229 00:08:44,125 --> 00:08:45,005 They were just sick on that. 230 00:08:45,275 --> 00:08:47,245 - Like the day after your birthday, you're sick. Yeah. 231 00:08:48,305 --> 00:08:50,685 - We said, let's just give everybody the day off. 232 00:08:51,335 --> 00:08:53,405 - Let's move. Oh, that's how that came about. , 233 00:08:54,075 --> 00:08:55,075 - Stop - The lying. 234 00:08:55,155 --> 00:08:56,245 - Fair enough, fair enough. 235 00:08:56,245 --> 00:08:59,645 Stop the lion and come to the free webinar on Friday, 236 00:08:59,715 --> 00:09:01,965 January 26th at one Eastern. 237 00:09:02,185 --> 00:09:05,285 And you can get registration info for that at bli 238 00:09:05,795 --> 00:09:08,045 info.com/free webinars. 239 00:09:08,045 --> 00:09:09,445 Was there anything else you wanted to preview 240 00:09:09,505 --> 00:09:11,325 for us before we hang up? Just 241 00:09:11,325 --> 00:09:13,485 - Love partnering with you, Kai. Thanks for all your help. 242 00:09:14,365 --> 00:09:16,245 - Absolutely. So listeners, check it out 243 00:09:16,245 --> 00:09:17,325 and we'll see you next time. 244 00:09:31,515 --> 00:09:34,125 This has been a production of Balancing Life's issues 245 00:09:34,155 --> 00:09:35,845 with your hosts, Kai Sorenson 246 00:09:35,845 --> 00:09:39,165 and Wendy Wallner, produced by me Kai Rate. 247 00:09:39,175 --> 00:09:41,085 Leave a review and subscribe to the podcast 248 00:09:41,725 --> 00:09:43,445 wherever you listen so you can get brand new 249 00:09:43,445 --> 00:09:44,605 episodes as they drop. 250 00:09:45,025 --> 00:09:46,965 Got an idea for the show. Email me, 251 00:09:47,205 --> 00:09:49,725 KI at balancing life's issues.com. 252 00:09:50,525 --> 00:09:51,845 Anything to add? Miles? No.