And now for an animal joke.
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
I repeat, what do you call a bear with no teeth?
The answer is
going to be revealed at the end of the episode.
But first,
get your ears ready because it’s the Happiest Animal Show on Planet Earth.
The Happiest Animal Show on Planet Earth.
You want to be sad? No!
Do you want to be glad? No. Wait. Yes.
Well, it’s the Happiest Animal Show on Planet Earth. .
Hello and welcome to the Happiest Animal
Show on Planet Earth, the podcast that asks the very important question.
What animal is making you happy today?
Not yesterday, not even last night, but today.
I'm Rob and I'm Laura.
And we are a sister brother pair of zoologists, filmmakers and songwriters.
We are here to explore the wonderful world of wildlife and discover
why animals make us happy.
Today we are celebrating Mother's Day and the moms of the animal Kingdom.
We'll hear a song about an animal with three hearts
and our special guest is comedian and mom Kelly Vrooman.
Here we go.
What animal is making you happy today?
I want to know.
In honor of Mother's Day, we have given ourselves the theme of great
animal mothers and happy Mother's Day to you, Laura, since you are a mother.
Yes. I'm a proud mom of a girl named Maxine.
So, Laura, what animal mom is making you happy today?
This animal is one that sometimes people think is a bad mom.
But it's really a good mom.
Okay, okay. Clues one.
It has hooves.
It's a good swimmer.
Oh. Clue two.
The moms have their babies.
1 or 2 babies.
Usually born in late May, early June around North America.
Okay.
Yeah, I think I know what it probably is, so keep going.
Okay. Three.
It has a reddish brown coat in the summer.
Changes.
More of a gray color in the winter.
Yeah.
And this is probably going to give it away for sure.
This animal will flip up its white tail
when it's feeling nervous or scared or like there's danger.
All right, so you chose the white tailed deer.
I did, I chose a deer.
Whitetail deer.
I was thinking about I know I was thinking of all the animal moms.
And then I started thinking about deer,
because we spent a lot of time in our early career filming deer.
So what makes a whitetail deer a great mom?
Whitetail deer moms know exactly what to do
when their babies are born to protect them from predators like coyotes.
And it's something you might not expect.
They leave their babies.
They leave their fawns hiding in the woods alone for hours each day,
and then they come back and check on them.
But the cool thing is that they lick their bodies clean when they come back
with their little deer tongues.
They're just licking the whole foreign body
all of it up, so that the fawn doesn't smell like anything.
So when the mom deer leaves, the fawn is protected because it's hiding.
It's camouflaged, got little spots to stay, perfectly camouflaged,
and there's no scent.
There's no smell so that predators like coyotes can't find the thorns.
Yeah. You know, I've only. I'm.
I'm actually really impressed by a baby fawns camouflage.
I'm sure I've walked past baby deer
in the woods, quite a few times where I didn't notice them.
I think I can probably only think of about 3 or 4 times
where I stumbled across a baby deer and spotted it.
They're so good at hiding there.
So yeah, you're right.
It is a funny thing
because they look so tiny and helpless and then you think where is its mom.
Yeah.
Well why isn't its mom hanging around right, right.
Yeah.
It's it brings up a good point on what makes a good animal
mother, because it's different for every animal, isn't it?
Yeah.
I was thinking about sea turtle moms and how like
they lay their eggs on the beach and then the.
They never meet their babies. Right.
Their babies just hatch and go off and, and hopefully become a big sea
turtle someday.
But it's funny to think about moms who never get to meet their kids.
So I think it's cool to think about animal moms know somehow
what they're supposed to do, and it's very different than what we do as people.
You know, when my baby was born, I did not lick it all over.
I didn't lick my daughter all over to get the smell off of her.
You know, they would if I had licked my baby in the hospital room all over.
People would have said, what are you doing?
I'm just being a deer.
That's what deer do.
It's what the whitetail deer does, but it's.
Oh, we have all these adaptations
that we all do differently for each different baby.
So Laura, you chose a white tailed deer
as the animal mom that's making you happy today.
We'll find out what I chose right after this.
And now, baby advice
for new moms from a deer mom.
Tip number one congratulate Lations
on your new baby after your baby is born.
Get your baby to stand up right away.
Your baby should be able to stand up on its own
about 20 minutes after being born.
If you are a deer mom, tip number two
leave your baby alone in the forest
for hours at a time for several weeks.
Your baby will naturally blend in with the leaves and trees and be perfectly fine.
If you are a deer mom, tip number three
when you come back to find your baby hidden in the forest, follow
the sound of your baby's cry, a darling little bleat which sounds like this.
Now if you're a deer, of course,
by following these tips, your baby should grow up to be able
to bounce through forests and fields at 40 miles an hour.
Leap over eight foot fences and then freeze when they see headlights.
If your baby is a deer at
and we are back, Rob,
what animal mom is making you happy today?
What?
I ended up settling on was an animal
that made me think of my own mom.
Which is also my mom.
This is going to be interesting, right?
My first hint is that it's an animal that can be found
in North America, as well as, like, Europe and Asia.
Okay, so that's interesting because those are separate continents,
but it's the same basically the same animal.
Okay.
This is an animal that you and I have seen in the wild.
Okay.
The baby only weighs 1 pound at birth.
That's not very big, right?
The mom can weigh up to about 800 pounds.
Okay. Yeah.
Any guesses?
Is this an animal with fur? Yes.
Is it an animal that can have big claws?
Yes. Right.
Is it an animal that can also sometimes climb trees?
Yeah.
And an animal that we filmed in Alaska. Yes.
Yes, it is.
Is it a grizzly bear?
Yeah, it's actually, I chose the Alaskan brown bear.
Brown bear?
So brown bears and grizzly bears are the same animal.
They're the same species, but they are,
found in different places, and they hunt different things.
But it's the same animal.
So why is a grizzly bear mom making you happy?
Some question.
Why does it remind you of our mom?
Yeah.
So, grizzly bear moms.
I think one of my takeaways from our adventure in Alaska
was just how grizzly bear moms
were on top of everything that their, their, their kids were doing.
So we were out with our cameras and there was a group of like 5 or 6 of us,
and we were with a bear guide who knew bear behavior really well.
He could tell just from like, the flick of an ear
if she was paying attention to us, and he would turn around
and tell us to stop whatever you're doing
so that we we didn't scare the momma bear and make them leave.
Baby bear cubs are so cute.
They are just so clumsy and they just sort of like, roll around and they they do.
They kind of get scattered and mom has to bring them back in together,
and then they fall on each other, and then they're back
to what they were supposed to be doing. And now they're eating grass.
And then they forget they were eating grass,
and now they are playing with that fly that's over there.
And now they are back.
And so I feel like Mama Bear is just like, come on, let's get back to it.
Let's keep us in line, keep us safe.
But they are hilarious to watch those little baby bears.
Yeah.
Remember that time that the wolf showed up and,
the wolf was getting too close to the cubs?
Yes, I think the wolf was just looking for for food scraps and,
And the mama bear chased the chased that wolf 100%.
But those bear cubs had no clue.
They don't think of it as dangerous at all.
They were just like, lalala.
Another play button bear doing stuff out on the grass than this.
And yeah, well, this wolf gets closer and closer to them.
It reminds me of our mom because
our mom always knew what we were doing at all times.
She knew everything about our
schedule and what we should be doing, where to be, at what time.
She was, on top of everything.
Did I have my soccer cleats and my shin guards and my uniform?
Both colors.
You know, like, every, everything.
And so I think if we were ever in serious trouble, our mom would protect us.
Just like a momma brown bear would do. Yeah.
There's something about mama brown bears that just the bear.
Mama looks calm, hanging out, eating grass.
But really, that mom is totally on top of everything
that's happening around her and is ready to protect the Cubs at any cost.
Yeah, it is sort of the classic, mama bear, right?
Yeah, a mama brown bear. Great pic. Rob.
And now for a song.
So I was looking up lists of great animal moms
online, and the octopus just kept coming up.
Octopuses lay eggs, and some octopus.
Moms can lay up to 400,000 eggs
and they spend about six months guarding their eggs.
And they stop eating that whole time so that they don't have to
leave their eggs and can guard them the whole time to make sure they're safe.
Octopuses are incredible.
They're weird for so many reasons that I decided
to write a powerful country anthem about them,
and my own personal dream is that Miranda Lambert might sing it someday.
Here it is.
I got blue blood.
I got black ink.
I got a lot of little suckers and they’re tasting things.
I got no bones.
I got three hearts, I got brains on my arms and I'm wicked smar.
I got tough skin, i got color pop, I got camouflage that'll make your jaw drop.
I’ve got crazy eyes, I got a tongue with teeth, I got toxic
venom in my hard beak.
Oh, I'm like a science fiction dream.
Closest thing to an alien you ever seen.
Oh you gotta see me to believe.
I'm a blue blooded, three hearted octopus lady
and I'm the real thing.
I’ve got eight arms,
I got no legs I can lay 400,000 eggs.
I can leave the water.
I can crawl back in.
If I lose an arm, I can grow it again.
I can flatten down.
I can get small. I can squeeze through a bottle.
No problem at all.
I love to hide. I love the reef.
I live alone and that's fine by meOh,
I’m like a science fiction dream.
Closest thing to an alien you ever seen.
Oh you gotta see me to believe.
I’m a blue blooded, three hearted octopus lady and I'm the real thing.
Oh you gotta see me to believe.
I’m a blue blooded, three hearted octopus lady and I'm the real thing.
It’s that time in the show for the happiest fan of all.
We're a fan like you.
Gives us clues to an animal that is making them happy.
Today's submission is from ten year old Henry from Portland, Oregon.
Clue number one.
This animal lives at temperatures of up to 700°F.
Ouch. Clue number two.
It has no eyes.
Clue number three.
It doesn't eat, but relies on energy
produced from bacteria that lives in a large gland.
Clue number four.
It has a shell made up of iron.
And another clue from us.
It lives in the deep ocean.
The answer is a volcano snail.
Volcano snails make Henry happy because they have some amazing features
that make him smile and think how amazing this creature is.
Thanks for your submission, Henry.
To all you listeners out there, what animal is making you happy today?
Grown ups.
If you or your family would like to submit a happiest
animal, visit our website at Happiest Animal Show. Com.
Our special guest today is Kelly
Roman and actor, a comedian and a mom.
Thanks for joining us today Kelly.
Oh, thank you so much for having me.
Welcome to the Happiest Animal.
We're so excited that you're with us.
And happy Mother's Day.
Tell me about your kids.
I have a, three year old and a five year old.
My five year old, girl, Keaton and, my three year old son, Crosby.
They are starting to play together.
It's try to kill each other.
The daily,
And it's not like I actually was able to read a chapter of a book the other day
while they before one of them started screaming bloody murder.
And I feel like it's a new era.
It's a new era I'm very excited for.
That's great.
Congratulations.
I have a three year old who is a daycare right now.
So I can do this.
My one is in TK school and then the other one
is in a preschool and it's just sending them off into the world.
And you go you got this.
And then I know assuming they'll be alive when you go pick them up.
Yeah. Yeah.
So we are celebrating mothers and parents on this episode
today and I'm so excited you're joining us.
So Kelly what animal is making you happy today?
Lizards.
Oh it loving lizards are my favorite.
I love them. Yeah.
Rob does.
Rob is really good at lizard spotting.
He loves it. Oh, great.
It's a it's an old pastime.
That's not like I'm
not a lizard, Scott. Or. Yeah.
Where's Rob again?
Oh, he's out spotting lizards.
Yeah.
So in my backyard here.
Now, I live in Los Angeles, and we we love our backyard.
There's all sorts of succulent
native plants, and there's some native fruit trees.
There's fig trees. There's an orange tree.
When we first moved here, there was a lizard.
And I don't know what kind of lizard, but it's the kind
that can snap its tail off as a defense mechanism.
It scales, hold its tail on, and when it is threatened by a predator,
it can pop those scales apart and pop its tail off, and the tail keeps squirming.
So the predator is then focused on its tail
and not the lizard itself.
So the lizard can escape while its tail wiggles around and the predator
is curious about the tail.
So my beautiful dog Wampa, when we bought
the house, was so curious just to sniff around everything.
And she comes upon this lizard which we named speckles
and speckles,
was obviously terrified of this white fluff ball and was like,
no thank you, I don't want to be your friend.
Speckles released its tail and it was writhing on the ground
as course Wampa fell for it, and speckles was able to escape.
And then over the next year or however long we got to see speckles
tail grow back, as speckles would be up on the walls around a plant.
And we always knew it was speckles, obviously,
because of the progress of its tail regrowing, and you could see
the difference in color from speckles body, which was a darker brown,
and then the new growth of, its tail was like a lighter color.
Fascinating. Yeah.
Yeah.
Whoa! It's great.
I was just looking this up.
I think what you saw was the alligator lizard.
Alligator lizard? What? Yeah.
Look it up and see if it looks like the right lizard.
It's a southern alligator lizard.
Yes.
Yes. It was.
Oh my gosh.
And they are long and look kind of like a snake.
And it.
So it scared me at first because for some reason
I'm not scared of lizards, but snakes will startle me.
It was one of these little southern alligator lizards.
Yeah.
It is truly one of nature's magic tricks that this can happen.
I mean, what other animal, when it's scared,
just can drop a body part, you know, as a as a distraction.
If I could drop my arm and run away and have it grow back.
Yeah, but, you know, it's a little tiny arm.
Yeah. Take a while.
But it's a tiny little arm.
Grows back.
Yeah. It's just like pink and raw at first.
Yeah.
Getting stronger all the time. Right?
It's it's so interesting.
I mean, anyone who lives around lizards and has pets, it's like you've encountered
this where you're your cat or your dog has his, like, stomped on a lizard.
It's not like the tail just falls off, the tail falls off
and then starts wiggling around like a worm. Yes.
I mean, and then your cat or dog is like, I've got it.
I did, yes. And you're like, no you didn't.
No. Throw it away.
It was a good dusting.
I mean, it I know it's fascinating.
It's fascinating.
And I don't want to
deny that or play that down, but I almost immediately puked it.
Oh, so gross to see this thing that should not be moving it like it should.
It should not.
It should be moving.
Right. That's part of nature. It's doing exactly what it should be doing.
The purpose of it is happening.
But to me, I was like,
oh, you should not be doing you're not you're not attached to a body.
You're just a tail now. But yeah.
Oh yeah, I remember grossed out at the idea that my dog would eat it.
She did it.
She just, like, batted it, like, sniffed it, but I, like, immediately,
like, grabbed my dog and ran inside and shut the door.
Like it it it worked on a scale that that lizard never even believed it could.
It scared away a human, and a dog almost made the human puke.
Yeah, it's got it's got a story to tell.
Oh, that's other lizards. Yeah.
It's like, guys, it's so good at this tail trick.
I was
in Hawaii one time, and, you know, Hawaii.
There are several different, geckos there and there.
Just the house, the normal house gecko, a real bland looking kind of brown,
so common.
And, in the house I was staying in, I remember it was night.
I shut the window, and when I shut the window,
it spooked a lizard, and I didn't know it was there.
And so.
But this this tail just dropped from above. No.
Oh, cool.
And this wiggling tail landed in front of me, and I.
I was like, what what what just happened?
And I had I didn't have a reference, so I was, I was like, it's a caterpillar.
It's a, it's a worm.
It's I went through all the things
and then I had to get down and stare at it and realize, oh, no.
And I looked up and there was this gecko.
Was that gecko running across the ceiling?
Yeah.
Even imagining that right now, I almost puked right now.
Like, I think it's one of the grossest, most useful things in nature.
So why does the alligator lizard make you happy?
Okay, so here's why it makes me happy.
When we first moved here, I kind of ignorantly
was using, weedkiller on my yard.
Okay, we had this lizard, we had several lizards,
and they were there, and I always felt like kind of weird,
but I was like, ooh, but I really want to get
rid of these weeds, and I want to have a nice yard.
And I was so proud of having a yard.
And I was using weed killer.
Well, now we have been not using weed killer for about three years,
and I, you know, we pull up the weeds and we use rakes, whatever.
Or we use, like, natural stuff.
And our yard has exploded with lizards
in a good way, like they are now kind of a little more comfortable with me.
We will pass each other on the trail.
No more tails are popping off.
But several things are happening.
Bugs, pests, pesky bugs are not as much of an issue, right?
Because they're eating the bugs. The lizards are eating the bugs.
You know this bugs around. Yeah.
And so I'm, I'm really excited that this kind of sacrifice
I've heard is a little harder with the, with the weeds.
But it's hard to pull weeds.
Well I, I, I do find it very satisfying but it's exhausting.
Yeah. Yeah.
When you get a full root and you yank that root up and the whole root
comes, it's, oh, there's nothing but the way the lizard's tail popping off,
pulling a full root up is the opposite feeling for me.
I opposite of puke, I love it, it feels so good, but it's just as really neat.
Like getting to be exciting.
Yes, I see it's really wrecked
improvement in the wildlife in my backyard.
It's so fun, harmony, to bring animals to your yard, to know that you've done
something that helps animals come into your yard is just a really good feeling.
I love it, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So that's why it makes me happy.
While, certain aspects of the lizard's tail popping off makes me not happy, I.
It hasn't been happening. They trust me now.
My wife grew up in LA, and, it's funny because I feel like people
don't really think of LA and think of wildlife,
but they're, you know, there is a lot of wildlife.
And I really like how, like hummingbirds are really common around that.
Oh, we have my favorite many.
Oh, I love them so much. They're so beautiful.
We specifically planted some plants to attract them.
Yeah.
And to attract those beautiful yellow butterflies.
There's also there are coyotes in the area, which is,
pretty, pretty common.
And so yeah, we always have to be a little careful for our small dog.
Yeah.
But yeah, it's great.
So, like, pretty much anywhere you live, you can do
they can do this to your backyard and attract wildlife and.
Yeah.
Oh, we live surrounded by roads and highways and other homes and big walls,
but we we have made a space that I think animals
are feeling safe and good in.
And chemical free. It's really funny.
What a magical backyard for your kids to your three year old
and your five year old.
It really has become, like you said, a little magical backyard for my kids
to experience this wildlife in, the second largest city in the country.
Lizards, specifically alligator lizards is a great choice.
That is a great choice. Thank you. Yeah.
Thank you.
Thank you so much for being here on the Happiest Animal
Show is a wonderful treat to have you.
Well, thank you so much for talking all about how animals make us happy.
It's that time we've all been waiting for
to find out the answer to our animal joke of the day.
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Do you have a guess?
The answer is
a gummy bear.
Thanks so much for listening.
And before we go, remember, we live on a beautiful planet.
So go out and find what makes you happy today.
Hey, Grown-Ups, we know you're busy, but if you like
our show, we'd love for you to tell your friends and family about it.
It is the best way for our podcast to grow and Grown-Ups.
You can also follow us on our social media accounts at Happiest Animal Show,
or check out other fun things on our website
like how to submit an animal or how to get merch.
Visit Happiestanimalshow.com.
The Happiest Animal Show is created by Laura Sams,
Robert Sams, and Dave Cain produced by Sisbro Studios,
hosted and directed by Laura Sams and Robert Sams,
and written by Laura Sams, Robert Sams with story editor Dave Cain.
And with only a little help from our cat walking across the keyboard.
Now let’s talk music.
Original music is written and performed by zero time
Grammy Award winning songwriters Laura Sams and Robert Sams,
except for the end credits music which was written by Laura and Rob’s
Grandma Max, and the joke answer suspense music was written by David Schultz.
The theme song was written
and performed by Laura and Rob and mixed by Jason Wells of Audio Wells.
The Octopus song was written by Laura, performed
by Laura and Rob, and mixed by the talented Jonny Newsome.
Thanks for listening. You are the best.