Hey. Welcome to the Stephanie Stevens show where
I help you discover the power of communication
and the keys that unlock the doors to
freedom.
In every area of your life. Well, hello,
my dear sweet friend fancy meeting you here.
Thanks for joining me for a few minutes
of your day. I am so
unbelievably honored.
Hey, I hope you're enjoying the quick connects.
Those are the short little 1 minute or
so. Mini podcasts that I am pushing out
to you each and every day just because
I wanna make sure that we get to
connect daily. And the longer forms take a
little bit longer to do for me because
I wanna really carve out the time and
sit down and be intentional and communicate with
you effectively, and, you know, just really talk
from the heart. So I gotta a carve
out time to do that, which I'm happy
to do. And then move it off into
podcast land where you get to hear to
just So I will get a few long
form episodes to you weekly, most definitely. But
my quick connects, that I am committed to
getting to you each and every single day.
So we can keep on connecting. Also, I'm
really enjoying my time with John
Success paradigm coach so I hope you are
2 of those episodes get a lot of
great feedback as well because it's T and
I, having a conversation. He's got decades worth
of victory experience now in personal mastery
and leadership growth and development. And so he
really does know how to hone in on
specific skills that we need to really grow
whatever it is we're working on our projects,
our businesses, our organizations, our companies, our team,
our family is you name it. And so
he's got a very unique style. I mean,
he's from out east, you know? And so
he can hear it in his talk. And,
of course, I'm from the Midwest. And so
when I was in radio nationally, when I
was spend time down south, I would have,
my southern friends make fun of the way
I said things like so
or roof.
Okay? With the o sound. And so when
I hear John, I sometimes get a kick
out of the way that he says certain
words. So the variety is the spice of
life So it's nice to hear somebody else,
you know, in conversation and to really be
able to hand you something that I think
is really valuable.
In terms of, How we can
remove really bad habits. We've got that whole
series, the 8 toxic behaviors that destroy leaders.
If you have not caught that episode, yet,
please go back and take a listen, you're
gonna love it. And then as we go,
we will continue to have John on, about
once a month or so. If so loving
that. Now today, I wanna chat with you
because we are, of course, here to
master...
Communication. And so in order to be an
effective communicator, there are a couple of things
I wanna touch on today. I've got 3
quick connects in a row that you'll be
hearing now that are gonna dive into the
different levels of listening.
We've talked about listening before, but I have
not drilled down deeply into 3 diff... Different
levels of listening. So I'm going to do
that on these quick connects coming up. There
are 3 in a row that are gonna
unpack level 1 level to a level 3
listening? Why is it so imperative to be
a good listener?
Because if you can get to practice sing
and mastering level 3 listening, my friend your
world will change
because you will be able to meet needs
and hear what people are actually saying so
fast, you're gonna become incredibly effective. You can
hear what's not being said. You can read
between the lines And at that point when
you're engaging that type of listening,
your mind is hearing and processing the words,
but you are also on an un unconscious
level picking up the body language, the nuances,
the pauses, the hesitation, the s, if those
exist, and it's gonna teach you a ton
about what this person is actually really communicating.
So that's key. Active listening is a key
component to being a master
communicator. It's not just about what we're speaking.
It's also about our listening. Something else that's
really important is clarity. So clear
communication is concise it doesn't engage or involve
mixed messages. It's clear and it's consistent. So
in in being so, it avoids
siri
complexities or jargon or rabbit trails. So when
we are in a leadership role and
communicating. We wanna be really mindful of our
audience so that we can adjust our message
accordingly. Rabbit trails are perfect.
And fine. When we're really really casually
talking, you know, amongst friends. We're not trying
to make major decisions, we're not affecting it
other people's lives
necessarily. We're just catching up. It's relaxed, it's
casual, and it's pretty low stakes, but when
we're talking in front of a team or
we're making a presentation or a pitch or
making a really important family decision or a
really important business decision. Clarity of conscience is
key. Oh. Did you like the iteration there?
Say that 3 times fast? Conscience and clarity
is key.
So even if we've got a bullet point
in our minds, the 3 most important points
we wanna get across, do that. Take the
time to do that. Trust me. It will
be worth it when people can comprehend what
you're saying because you are clear and concise.
You're not jumbled. You're not mixed. Then they
can trust you because there's a credibility
in that type of communication. Alright. Something else
we're gonna pay attention to, of course, we're
gonna talk a little bit more about as
we go as body language and tone.
So body language, it's
about 90 percent of communication when you are
face to face. Nonverbal cues, facial expression, tone
of voice. They sometimes
convey more than the words.
In fact, very often, they can convey more
than the words. Take a look at Sarcasm,
for example. You can say the same words,
2 different ways and have them literally mean
quite the opposite.
Right? Nice job is different from nice job.
You hear the difference. Right? And we've right
pretty much all done this. I know I
have Na
communication. It's
technique by which we are saying something that
we really don't wanna say. Right? When we're
snarky or sarcastic,
it means we are communicating something, usually of
displeasure, but we really don't wanna get into
the nitty gritty of saying it. And so
it's kind of our easy way out. Of
being honest sometimes and being really clear. But
this is key body language and tone are
going to convey so much more in most
cases than the words themselves here so we
wanna really tune in, hone in and be
great at reading the body language and decipher
the tone. 1 of the things that really
master community educators and leaders tend to do
is they empathize and understand. So in that
case, we are seeking to understand before being
stood. We're not as concerned with hammering our
point over everybody else's heads that empathetic piece
or component bridges the gap and communication by
acknowledging and respecting other people's perspectives. Now listen,
if you're in charge, and you've got a
team and it and team needs to implement
your mission or follow through on your requests,
then you're listening and you're em emphasizing, and
you're also making the various strong point that
you appreciate the feedback and at this point
in time, this is the direction we're gone,
and here's how it needs to be executed.
K? And then there's that whole feedback in
confirmation. Now the last episode that John Bet
and I did,
We rarely drilled down heavily on this concept
of feedback. We talked at length about how
to give feedback, and we talked at length
about how to receive feedback, both are equally
important
they look very differently, but if you can
become a really good feedback receiver, then you
can become very, very good and effective at
giving feedback, because you know how it feels
when somebody comes to you and is looking
for you to change something or modify something,
and they're coming to you in various ways.
I mean, let's face it not everybody has
mastered the art of communicating and can effectively
or even kindly come and bring forth a
request. Usually it looks more like a complaint.
And that can be really challenging to receive
because our initial tendencies to become very what.
Yet.
Defensive because we wanna protect. So when somebody
comes at us, we have to be able
to move into the mind frame
or mindset
of this is not personal.
This is just feedback and become that detached
observer to whatever it is that they're going
to bring our weight. Because remember, you can
always take it or you can leave it.
And 1 of the things that John and
I mentioned briefly. Don't believe this is true.
We are really not defensive about something we
don't believe is true. Right. So if somebody
came to you and said something totaled,
absurd. You would kind of just maybe say,
okay.
And laugh it off. Right? You wouldn't take
it seriously. You wouldn't be a upset, you
would roll your eyes or even laugh because
you you think it's silly and absurd. And
you know. You're not at all concerned that
it may be true.
When we get defensive, I think we do
that because it is possible that we are
concerned that the person is saying something that
we deep down know is true, but we
really don't wanna deal with. We don't wanna
face or we don't like. And so the
knee jerk responses to just get real defensive
and to put up that wall and say,
whoa what me no. You at the wrong
person. You're thinking of yourself or something like
that. But if we sense that we're feeling
defensive about what they're saying. The very first
question we must be mature enough to ask
is is it possible that this is true.
Just asking. Is it possible? Not saying it
is. I'm just asking if it's possible that
it's true. And entertaining the idea that if
I've heard this before, it may be something
I wanna take a look at. So just
these couple of points I've mentioned are gonna
really keep moving us into these expansive and
master ways to communicate. Impact of good communication
remember can never be underestimated it enhances our
relationships. It improves our teamwork work. It foster
a positive work environment, it reduces
misunderstandings and conflicts.
While it also promotes trust, it helps us
to work better with others. So whether it's
in personal
relationships or
professional settings, mastering the art of good communication
can lead to literally greater success in fulfillment,
which is why I always say, communication is
currency. It is the key that unlocks freedom
in every area of our life because we
are always communicating even if we're not
fantastic auditors.
We are
communicating through our words through our writings, through
our artwork, through our nonverbal verbal expressions. I
mean, look at dance, have you ever been
to a Ballet. If you're somebody who enjoys
that, then no nobody says a word, they
just simply dance they move their bodies in
certain ways that puts chills up and down
our spine because it's so magnificent
in it. Speak to strength and beauty and
creativity. So We are always communicating, let's master
it so that we can be so impactful
and effective. Alright. Thank you. As always my
friend for listening so much love to you,
and I can't wait to see you on
the next episode.
Thanks so much for listening to the Stephanie
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